The Hoely Hour - E78 Gout Dads!

Episode Date: March 18, 2022

Was Kim Kardashian coming out as a fascist on your 2022 bingo card? The girls let Kim know how much a stay-at-home parent is worth. Have you heard the term "pushing rope"? Hint: it is not the same as pushing P (which we still don't know what that means). Liz shares the linguistic history of how misogyny has developed in language over time and why women's sexual independence is treated like a taboo. Let's talk about power dynamics and specifically, Amelia's creepy math professor. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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$15 per month equivalent. Taxes and fees extra. New customer offer for initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes. me slow when network is busy see terms did you see one of the comments we got when i was wearing the carhartt beanie it's like girls that wear carhartt shit and don't do carhartt things i'm like are you gatekeeping fucking carhartt now gatekeeping having a warm head welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia samson and i'm liz ball before i forget which i did liz is dropping this at the beginning of the episode but i'm saying this at the end follow us on tiktok instagram twitter at the holy hour email us your stories get ad free access to our episodes on

patreon early and ad free our email is holy hour podcast at gmail.com no the if you don't know that by now you might be new here we secured our email before we secured the name it's just holy hour podcast at gmail.com send us compliments if you want to we fucking love that love that um but yes patreon uh join our discord they're having a movie night currently i don't know what they're watching tonight but it's cute as fuck i fucking guarantee it oh my god so many people reached out to me about weed i know i saw that so many people were like oh my god wedding cake's amazing and then someone else on patreon sent us a message of like i think you'll like this snack love that so i will be checking that out oh yeah the discord's the place to be if you're not on it

you should be it's popping because you're cute and everybody on there is cute yeah we're back we were both on vacation yeah we had it's been two weeks since we've recorded amelia has gone on a cross-country trip i'm fucking tired you were in california i went to la and then i went to see my parents in florida and then i went to philadelphia for my brother's bachelor party you've been everywhere yeah you were gone for like what a week 10 days oh okay there's a lot of places to go in 10 days but i tested negative for covid yesterday nice so that's all around a successful trip yeah i would say uh-huh i would say and then really really fun i went skiing in colorado she only cried once i only cried once and uh for some context i have only gone

this is my second time going skiing and if this is your first time listening welcome one two my happy to have you yes thank you for thank you for coming here and being with us today um but the first time i went skiing with mr liz uh it i just trusted him which might have been a little ignorant on my behalf but he um we were just kind of trying to like scrape it together and not have to pay much money so my my ski boots were rentals they were very uncomfortable um and my toes hurt for like a week and then uh we borrowed someone's powder skis um so they're wider they're harder to ski in uh and then he also took me to the top of mount hood which i think all the other things would have been okay but being at the top of mount hood

having never skied before um and not knowing what i was doing it was really hard and he it started off by him punching me in the face to catch me from basically tomahawking down mount hood to my to my death so this was a much better experience i was the star of my beginning skiing speed demon i saw they called you oh i was so proud i was following on twitter like that's my fucking but i did cry because on day two we got a lot of fresh snow and i didn't i've never skied in powder obviously um that's what the ski people call it fresh that's what like the little like cute snow bunnies call it is shredding that gnar yeah i was shredding the gnar no uh i've never i've never been on on it's hard it's like you move slower and like fresh snow and it's all

fluffy that makes sense it's fun but like i kept getting stuck and then i didn't feel confident like turning the other way so like all of these like people who are like stoked that it's fresh snow are like flying past me and then our snowboarder friends were like all right we're getting cold so we're gonna leave and then like so Mr. Liz is just waiting for me at the bottom of this hill and then he's like you need to turn the other way I was like I can't do it and he's like it's I felt like a kid doing math with their dad I was like I like turn around and I kind of finally make it down to him and then I was like this is hard I feel like I forgot everything I learned yesterday and then i just started like i was weeping i was like oh man i would have been

so fucking frustrated yeah when you're just frustrated and you're like i just need to cry for a second yeah and then i was good the rest of the day i even went off a jump i'm honestly you went off a job yeah i'm impressed truly like you only crying well i would have cried like thinking about i will cry if i think about skiing for too long so i'm honestly so proud of you thank you i had a lot of fun 20 out of 10 experience as an outsider you know what i mean that's my fucking girl you're you being proud of me is the only reason i did it help i know that's why i'm telling you all i need is that's why i'm fucking telling you i said truthfully when mr liz is cheering me on i feel so cool yeah i bet he showed me a video of me i was like can i see the video of

me skiing because he's been doing it his whole life so he like can just like take his phone out and record me while i'm fighting for my goddamn life on these fucking snow sticks and then and then i was like can i see it and i thought i was like absolutely shredding and then i look like a baby deer you know that you felt good is a fucking win i compared it to my first ski video and there's a obvious improvement everyone starts somewhere yeah he was like you're doing really well for only two days of skiing and then our other friends were hyping me up i feel like i've talked about this for too long i'm just bragging now you deserve to brag yeah i i did very well for for what was expected of me hell yeah

uh that's great i'm glad you had such a good time it was it was nice we went on two completely different adventures these past couple of weeks i think the i don't know if you felt this way while you were um taking a little break but it was nice to not think about anything else word i had so much shit to think of my brother's bachelor party was a success he was so fucking happy because you're like the the sister of honor right or what the the best man ended up the best sister i'll take that the best man did so much fucking planning but he just like wasn't communicating it to me because it's like he's like this is my job he's like my second brother so he was like it's fine mealy chill out i got it um but he did such a good job planning our airbnb host

canceled on us a week before did i tell you this oh yeah yeah so we found a really really great place and the people that live there like very clearly did like lots of drugs it was like a really cool spot um and i learned so much about shit that i never wanted to know about about my brother but it was his bachelor party so i was like just like chilling and like being like the cool sister I feel like your brother and my brother are like in that they're like why would you do this to me yes when it came to starting a sex and dating podcast the entire Liz the entire weekend he kept going um like whenever anybody would like do something that he didn't approve of or like did something that like he wasn't happy about he'd be like that's not very sex

positive of you or he'd be like that's very sex negative like he kept bringing up the podcast and he's like yeah I have to keep remembering that my sister has a sex podcast like it was it kept coming up it was so fucking funny that is really funny actually and it's one of those things where like they keep a joke gets funnier the more you bring it up it was constant the last day he kept saying it there's a word for that in comedy what I learned it's called um the game so the game is like you keep doing this thing or repeating this thing and it's part of the joke I probably just completely fucked up that description well no i think that i mean whatever it was explaining it on tiktok oh shit we know one of those anyway we do moving on um but yeah no it was a success um

but this brings me to the first thing that i wanted to ask you about that i learned at the bachelor party okay it's a phrase that i had never heard i brought it up to squint today and he was like yeah everybody knows that i'm like if liz knows this i'm going to jump off of the roof i'm excited do you know what the term pushing rope is no thank god okay i've only heard of pushing p oh yeah that's like pushing positivity it's the stupidest goddamn thing oh that's what p means that's what that's what i saw in urban dictionary i thought it meant cool like p just meant like cool i don't know who knows i have no idea you this way ahead of me i was asking the kids at work i was like you know what i'm just gonna own it i don't know what the fuck this means

couldn't we had to try and explain it to a client and they're like uh we don't know what you're talking about but we trust you it sounds like percocet pushing percocet yeah speaking of which my dad uh got bucked off a horse did i tell you this no oh my god this is um speaking of percocet um my dad got bucked off a horse and uh broke three ribs and and like fucked up like a lot of his spine to his spinal tissue when i was in florida oh my i know what the fuck i know yeah and he was like i'm fine and then every time he would move he'd be like ah like i'm like dad you're clearly not fine like go get an mri and he did and he broke some ribs um so he's so he's taking percocet uh he's he's on a fucking another level only him 72 years old and just like getting

bucked off horses i wouldn't have even guessed your dad was 72 i know because he's like he acts like he's like 18 he listens to this well he also looks that's a compliment dad he looks significantly younger than that yeah he has a really young soul he did like a heart test like a cardiac test and uh he has the heart health of a 50 year old good for him um my dad has gout so my dad has gout gout dads gout dads i was trying to hit the mic i think that's the episode title gout dads nice my dad has gout you know what all dads are the fucking same okay they all clip their cell phone to their belt they love new balances um does your dad wear new balances and he also no

he doesn't clip his his phone well they have gout they definitely do have gout um they care about the thermostat yes so much they go to great clips or sports clips yeah my dad is bald so but he would if he had hair that's what he would do and uh uh what else do dads like um golf oh my dad does really like golf my dad fucking loves golf that's because it's just like outdoor drinking with the with the boys yeah i respect that that sounds like a good time well see when my dad broke his back he was with the guy that he was riding horses with is a literal spine doctor so that was like oh yeah that's good and my mom was texting this guy like what is he going to live and my dad was texting him like when

can i play golf again he's like i'm confused are you hurt is he gonna die like is he all right um that's funny golf gout there's another g for sure golf gout and gas oh my dad loves getting gas at the costco my dad loves costco gas yes golf and costco gas in the thermostat we've we got it okay back to back to pushing rope so oh yeah so apparently that's the term for when you like wait can i guess yes um pushing rope i would guess it's if you're trying to push a poop out you know when you have like a ropey kind of poop yeah it's not it's neither hard nor soft you're like that part of that part of it you're close with that definition okay uh oh so pushing p oh sorry i guess they mean the same thing pushing rope slash p uh is it when your dick

isn't completely hard and you're trying to put it in yes wow gout dads that is what it is i did not realize there was a term for it but it's like if you're trying to push rope through a hole it like kind of like buckles oh yeah it's pushing i mean we've all been there they're like i know it'll get hard when it's in there what they said that's what all the guys at the back they were all saying when i was there like we have to have you sign an NDA but this is all I'll say about what we talked about at the bachelor party they were saying that it's like there there is the expectation that you put it in it's gonna get hard but if you're drinking that's not always the case you know and other reasons as we've

talked about but we were talking about it in terms of drinking it might not and then you're just pushing trying to push a rope through I thought it was such a funny phrase it just is such a perfect visual i you just made me have like a flashback i cannot remember who this was oh god i was we were having sex and they were like sitting down and i was like on top and i like bent my pelvis in a weird way and it bent their dick and it they were hurt and got soft was he like ah yes oh god that happened i cannot i cannot remember who it was you like blacked out you're just like we're just not gonna i just think that i've had not that i've had a lot of sex it's like i've had a lot of sex with like one person on a few occasions like at least three

or four people where it's like consistent sex for a year heard so then you're like which dude was it yeah which guy's dick did i break yeah i hope one of them that deserved it it might have been my ex i honestly can't remember i was like yeah i hope i don't know it might have been but i do feel like we continued when he felt better well that's good that's at least a champ about it i think so but that sounds painful af i have been reading a book i do know how to read as some of the uh male tiktok commenters might be confused about i do know how to read um but i've been reading this book called word slut by amanda montel and she is a linguist which is like someone who fucking studies language i love that what a cool title to

have i want to be a linguist um she also co-hosts a podcast with her friend isa um and it's called sounds like a cult because she also wrote the book right there cultish um which is about the language of fanaticism oh hell yeah so this book wordslet is more about how um the history of language and like the english language is like inherently misogynistic essentially what is it um and just how certain words that used to be like non-binary uh have become ways to insult woman women so i thought that was really interesting but um i thought this was some interesting food for thought uh in my college socio-linguistics classes i started learning about some of the subtle ways gender stereotypes are hidden in english like how the term penetration

implies and reinforces the idea that sex is from the male perspective like sex is defined as something a man does to a woman the opposite might be envelopment or enclosure can you imagine how different life would be if that's how we referred to how we referred to sex if women were linguistically framed as the protagonist of any given sexual scenario could that potentially mean that a woman's orgasm as opposed to a dude's would be seen as the proverbial climax the ultimate goal questions like that blew my mind wow i thought that was so interesting too like just these little words that you're not paying attention to like penetration you're not thinking like oh i am being penetrated yeah but it those types of words do place men as a protagonist of

sex damn damn holy shit it's so important to recognize like how much internalized misogyny we have as women too not recognizing that that's how these words are being used like i would have never have i've always thought of penetration as like the other way around always yeah and i like never because that's just like how we've been socialized to think about it men perform penetration on women we're not being penetrated yeah or like men aren't being enveloped or enclosed which is i like that so much more it sounds like safe and like like a hug yeah we're hugging a hug a little wiener hug um but there was another part of this book that i wanted to read um also she calls it word slut because she explains like linguistically like the word slut is it has all

the components that we like as just people like it's fast and it has it's short it's a short word and then it has like the slut like a nice t at the end and the the like it rolls off your tongue yeah um i love the word slut slut slut whore i like it too whore slut there's a section where she explains cunt and the word cunt not what it is but um it's she explains why we like it to say cunt so many times what is largely considered the english language's most offensive term for women didn't actually start as an insult at all cunts roots are also up for debate but most sources agree they can be traced back to the proto-indo-european world sound k like cu which indicated femininity the

same cu is also like cu is also related to modern words cow and queen the latin terms cuneus meaning wedge is also connected to cunt as the old dutch word cunt like k-u-n-t-e which gives the word its dramatic final t for centuries cunt was used to refer to women's external genitalia without any negative nuances whatsoever but like so many other terms referencing femaleness it didn't stay that way what particularly in what's particularly interesting about cunt's pejoration so she explains that pejoration is when a word starts out with like a neutral meaning and becomes negative um is that it is directly linked to human history itself 10 000 years ago when homo sapiens lived nomadic lifestyles wandering from place to place men and

women all had multiple sexual partners and female sexuality was considered totally normal and great it wasn't until human beings stopped moving that women with sexual independence started gaining a bad rap because once owning land became desirable people wanted to be able to pass it down to their children and in order for men to know who their children were female monogamy became a must to create a system of inheritance societies became patriarchal and any remaining notions of goddess-like sexual liberation went kaput with the end of women's sexual liberation came a general disgust for female sexuality dooming dooming words like cunt forever or until the end of patriarchy at least but i thought that was so interesting to see how um the repulsion of

women's sexuality has become like this where we are now essentially which is just like a constant fight to be treated like a person yeah um and like why uh there are just like a lot of men you'll see them in our comments that just they don't care about women no they don't treat them like people they don't care about them and it's because they've inherited this idea that female sexuality is bad yeah and it has very old roots as we can tell from this book because it goes on to explain like just that's linguistics have played a huge role yeah in in something that we're all experiencing yes 100 it's been so interesting to see how men online react when women have a voice you know how these words have been started like have been being used as insults for like pussy

is another one i was watching um she talks about that too the history of curse words um hosted by nicholas cage on netflix which is super fucking random um but uh how like that was just kind of a word that people used and now it's like used as an insult cunt is the same and it's like whenever there's any sort of like semblance of like women being thought of as like an equal in any sense it's like shot down in in history like over and over again and as she's saying in this too like whenever the patriarchy ends maybe that'll change but like who the fuck knows when that's going to be probably not in our lifetime which is sad maybe um see it's just like little tiny tiny little baby steps um and we are lucky in a lot of ways obviously being white women in

america oh yeah um and still we get so much like hate thrown our way from just being like just like existing on specifically tiktok i know that we were like talking about how like this will this ties into like the hate that we're getting from just like being people um and how words have evolved around our experience as women and how like we've internalized that as well like cunt is such a i grew up thinking that that was like the actual worst word ever you know it's like you can say anything but cunt and once i started saying it i was like cunt cunt it's just like such a it's such a fun word to say i couldn't stop saying it cunt cunt fucking slut they said cunt in australia and yeah and it means like buddy yeah um one thing that she does mention

i haven't even really gotten through this book and i can't wait to finish it because it's just so interesting and you learn so much but she does point out like some words are being reclaimed um And we have, I mean, I think a lot of our listeners are pretty aware, but I think that we should all acknowledge that we have black women to thank for that. Black women have done an amazing job at reclaiming words that the patriarchy uses to insult us. Like, bad bitch. Yes. Like black women are the first people to make the word bad mean something like badass or cool or like sexy. Yes.

So she lists a few words that are just, you know, we can thank black women for changing them. She also goes on to mention that since the late 1990s, black female recording artists have used the phrase bad bitch to refer to a confident, desirable woman as opposed to a mean or hostile one. um kudos to trina's 1999 song debatis bitch and rihanna's bad bitch hip-hop is also responsible for the word ho um and she spells it h-e-a-u-x a french you're looking and thus chiquer and more pleasant alternative spelling to hose that my female friends and i began using in 2017 i love it because that was really funny yeah but um i just love that like here we are the holy hour reclaiming a fucking word used as an insult against women i love that for us i love it too look at us high five got dads love it i'm like let's just um and not to talk your ear off

too much more but i do think that one other piece of this that is so meaningful and helpful that i did come across um was uh so like why do we go along with this type of language you know why if we as women are so often like villainized in linguistics and um just in language we're like repulsive if that makes sense yeah um she says i'll offer the simple answer i'll offer the simple answer first in our culture men run the show women are taught to follow their leads to please them and thus we go out of our way to fit into semantic categories set up for us prude or whore bitch or sweetheart princess or dyke but there is a slightly more complex answer too which says what's really going on is that women happen to be better at a thing called listening cornell linguist sally

mcconnell ginnett once argued that women on the whole have become better at picking up on thoughts feelings and perspectives of the people they're talking to theoretically that should be a good thing but where this gets tricky is that this generally ends up giving men more space to project the particular metaphors that make sense to them all over our culture's collective vocabulary as if their perspectives are the only ones that count mcconnell ginnett explains it like this the more one talks and the less one listens the more likely it is that one's viewpoint will function as if it were community consensus even if it is not the idea here is that on some level women are aware that dudes have come to understand their viewpoint as the only one that exists and wouldn't pick up

on the metaphors that represent women's positions even if they tried if they did sissy might mean the word we use for good friend instead of buddy and pussy might be what we call i don't know a warrior badass queen but as mcconnell ginnett says the more attention one pays to perspectives different from one one's own the more likely one is to give tacit indeed sometimes unwitting support to these other views simply by being able to understand them thus women's experiences wind up getting squashed under their own generosity as listeners stop listening women stop listening entirely and just talking over men and gaslighting them gaslight girl boss gatekeep gatekeep all day yeah that's all you need that was a period at the end of the fucking sentence

damn thank you for reading that i want to meet her me too maybe we will i have kind of a gross topic i want to hear it's it's not on the list oh it's not on the list no okay sorry i'm nervous no it's no it's i i'm nervous it's not anything you should be nervous about so um i was thinking the other day i actually think about this frequently but i was thinking about how i wanted to talk about this on the podcast because i feel like maybe this is just a me issue but it's probably not you masturbate in the middle of the day yeah sometimes same i have realized i am wildly uncomfortable for the rest of the day if i masturbate in the middle of the day really i get like swamp vag interesting i'm like wet for the entire day and not in like a i'm still

like turned on kind of way i'm just lubed up for the entire i have to take a shower after i masturbate really every single time i hate it you don't have this issue clearly i want to know if anybody else does can you let us know i feel like i would feel like that if i were having sex i don't have the issue when i have sex it's very very strange unless i'm having sex with a condom then i'm like lubed up all day and i like i hate that fucking feeling on the condom right but me squints i'm only sleeping with squints we haven't used a condom in a while and i don't have that issue you don't need a brag just kidding i'm over here not on any hormonal birth control oh you we cut this out of a past episode but um anyone that has morena it's seven years not five years baby

it's good to know it's new info if you have morena it was a five-year uh birth control method now they've extended that to seven anyway i'm not having sex with condoms with squints because we're only sleeping with each other and um i don't have the issue but if i masturbate maybe i just make myself so wet but i get swamp vag so i wanted to open this up to the audience please do you get swamp vag tell me if you get swamp vag i get swamp vag when i'm working out that's fair yeah and swamp ass yeah same whenever i work out yeah those were the days just be getting sweaty anyway all right new topic i haven't talked about this on the podcast yet i know i'm when you texted me at because you're like have i talked about this and i was like well any more detail yeah i mean

so this is this is also a good what the fuck this is a good like not only have you not talked about this on the podcast you haven't told me this story seriously yeah fuck maybe as i tell it maybe i have i'd be surprised if i haven't okay um but this would be like a good this is a good it to be fair you do have a lot of shocking stories that's true i do this this is like a you've been through some shit i really have i really i did something in a past life i don't know what it was um but i'm sorry no no no no the universe was gearing you up to talk about it on this podcast that's true everything has led up to this lifetime exactly amen um but this is a good like commercial i guess for um we're going to do uh sexual assault awareness month again next month

in april um consent is my kink merch was what we did last year we're going to be selling those again we'll talk about this more in the future but this is um a good kind of peek into the kind of conversations that we're going to have because this is about power dynamics um last year we talked about this in terms of we named him charles manson because he was running an entire cult that's probably why i didn't talk about it because that was like a heavy fucking topic at the moment um when I was in college I was really bad at math I'm still bad at math but in college I was bad at math and I was taking the class was math 114 if you if you like um took an exam and got into math 114 which miraculously I did that was the only math class you had to take if you passed it the

the class name math 114 I feel like is giving me a flashback yeah I know I know I only took math my freshman year because i was like i'm never that's the first thing i'm removing from my hard drive of my brain of my noodle of my noodle my noggin i took math 114 um and my professor was this young gent um who was so hot he looked like um oh what's the fucking james dean like the actor not the porn star i said so amelia sent me a picture of this guy and i said he looked like nate jacobs for i could totally see that for my euphoria sluts out there yeah in that picture he definitely did um but yeah he looked like he looked like james dean i was like a kind of like a teacher's pet with like all of my professors because i had like just gotten to college and

we had like all of this like narrative fed test from high school teachers about how hard college was gonna be oh my god also low-key i can kind of see that from you just because like of how close of a relationship you have with your parents yeah so that's and it's the same thing I would suspect with like your therapist like you picked her because you felt like you were talking to one of your parents whereas I'm the opposite I'm like I don't want to sit in the back of the class you want to talk to somebody that's like a friend yeah yeah totally that's interesting that's good insight well I this guy I was really close with like a few of my high school teachers and so he was kind of like that like I felt instantly connected to him because he was just like

young and cool um and during uh parents weekend in October so it was a month after we started school he like asked to meet my parents and I was like okay because I thought that that was just like a thing that they did you know oh I wasn't like because we had a small class it was like 20 people so I was like maybe he's like meeting everyone's parents this weekend I didn't think anything of it so we like came and met my parents and like sat outside with us and like my mom was like that was interesting he wanted to meet us and I was like I think he's doing this with everyone I didn't think anything of it fast forward to we had like a well I'm not gonna fast forward yet I was in his office a lot late at night like getting extra help from him when I say I'm bad at math

I'm like I have like a learned helplessness even if I understand it I'm going to fuck up somehow like I'm just bad at math I can relate to that it's just it makes it's never made any sense to you should try having a dad who's a math teacher because i didn't know he's a math teacher yeah you could spend your entire your entire childhood just like crying at the kitchen table oh hell wow i didn't know he was i didn't know he was a math teacher yeah it doesn't make a lot of sense it does it does make sense i could see him being a math teacher um sort of he could he would try and help me but i just like did not get a lot of stuff and then you get mad at me we're both just like more artistic brained uh-huh and that's great i mean i love that for us just let me

fucking read shakespeare and write an essay about it hell yeah three minutes anyways i thrived in film class mostly because it was the easiest class ever um anyway so i was in his office all the time and like he would always like we like had a friendship kind of like since i would be in there so late we would spend all these hours together he would like put his head down on the desk that i was working at like all my shit out and he'd be like i'm so tired and i'd be like oh you gotta go to sleep it was just like that was the kind of like rapport we had and then during finals week um he had like a big class study group the night before the final where all of us were in there and he was like pale and like looking like really tired and just like

tapped and so I emailed him when I got back from that study group with a question about the test and then at the end of the email I was like you look really tired I hope you get some sleep see you tomorrow yeah he emailed me back and he was just like our relationship is getting inappropriate i would appreciate if you didn't email me like this anymore it was literally a question with like a fun little close at the end you know yeah it's just like a thoughtful thing i hadn't that's like when my boss was emailed me like when she knew i had a rough day and she was like i'm thinking of you today like it's just like a it's a thoughtful thing it's a thoughtful thing and so i was like bitch fucking relax all of my roommates i was like i lived in a suite and like

i called all of them in i was like did i fuck up like is this like an inappropriate thing for me to say and they're all like no so i emailed him back and i'm like i am so sorry like i was just you just look tired and he emailed me back and he was like it's fine i just can't wait to not be in a position of power with you anymore and i was like como se va so i took the final turned it in What the fuck are you talking about? The next day, I, like, didn't even look at him. If I were 18, 19, I would have no idea what the hell was going on. I was so fucking confused.

Like, what do you mean a position of power? Yeah, right. So I asked my roommates, I'm like, is he hitting on me? And they were like, no. Let's just say no, you know? Because, like, in that moment, like, I had nothing to compare it to. Yeah, because he's a teacher. Right.

So I took the final, turned it in. And before I got back to my dorm, he had emailed me. And he was like, Loved being your teacher. I would love to see you now that I'm not your teacher anymore. And I was like kind of hyped because he was like so hot. And like I didn't see an issue with it at the moment because I was just kind of like, oh. Oh, because you're still a fucking child.

Yeah, right. Exactly. In my opinion, if you're 20 and under, you're a child. Yes. Agreed. Agreed. And he knew that. I was trying to think how old.

He must have been like 30 at the time. we're literally still a teenager the word teen is still in the age you are so i kind of entertained it in the moment and i was just like i would love that i like love you as a person i didn't say love but like i did i like enjoyed being around him he was just like fucking cool and you had built like a bond exactly yeah i had spent so much time with him yeah and then you're like stoked like the hot teachers into you yeah and like there's something cool and sexy about it but totally it was like very like cinematic and like every girl in my class was like felt the same about him they were all like oh my god he's so fucking hot like da da

da and like he knew he was hot shit so I was just like nice because I got zero attention from boys in high school so I was lit and um he emailed me back and he was just like um all of those nights where I would like put my head on my on your desk that you were working at and say I was tired I like wanted you to come home with me yeah and then he would be like i'd have to take cold showers after like to calm myself down that's yeah he would like recall outfits that i had worn he was like i had these like purple fishnets that i would wear don't i don't fucking know and we all talked about we all had like a quirky girl we did i was still in mine mine was um they weren't fishnets but they were tights with rips in them because i was edgy oh hell yeah they were like

it to look like i fell through a bunch of bushes and maybe you did nobody will ever fucking know mind your fucking business like i'm so cool anyways anyway he called he like brought up the purple fishnets brought up the purple fishnets and then he brought up like yoga pants that i would wear and like he was just like this is all very objectifying oh yeah he would he would talk about shit that i was wearing he would like it got to the point where like very very quickly that i was very uncomfortable it everything you've told me he hasn't said a single thing about who you are as a person why he likes you it's only like i want to fuck you a child he knew i'm certain that i wouldn't pick up on it because i was so young yes like i loved getting compliments about

my appearance at that age i was like oh of course because i was also very insecure listen we all do yeah but who doesn't like to be told they're cute right now if my if i was in my if i was 28 like getting my like phd and a professor hit on me i'd be like okay that's kind of like what's that but like he would still kind of be like maybe we shouldn't do this back then i was so clueless about like how fucked up this was yeah someone in their 30s like he clearly was aware because he acknowledged it and then going after i bet this isn't even the first time he's done that no definitely not and going after someone who he knows is too young to know that something is not right that they're being groomed that it's inappropriate so yeah exactly he and then I

started to pick up on like I'm not really pick up I was starting to just get like uncomfortable because like I was so inexperienced I was still a virgin at this point and I just like didn't really know how to like interact in this kind of way and I was starting to feel like because whenever I would tell anyone about this they'd be like uh Amelia this like isn't normal yeah he would like ask me what I was doing and I would say like oh I'm studying in the library and then he would like come and wait outside the library for me and he'd be like I'm waiting for you out here you know I'd be like I'm stuck in a study group and then I would just not leave the life even if I wasn't in a study group I would just like wouldn't leave the library because I would

be so fucking scared and then he ended up transferring schools like very abruptly and then i added him on snapchat like two years later because i was kind of like i wonder what he's up to and it was like when snapchat was like a thing yeah and he at that point you can drink so you've like yeah been through some shit uh-huh yeah got some got some hair on my back what um don't know what that meant hair on your chest that was yeah that was a stream of consciousness um but he texted me right when i added him on snapchat and he was like i would appreciate if you would leave me alone yeah what the fuck did you do nothing nothing but i'm certain that he got in trouble at his new school for doing that exact thing and was like very very on guard and that was it i had

never heard from him again i still have his number i should i kind of want to hit him up and just be like what are you doing wait so i are professors not allowed to hook up with students maybe not their own student no i mean there are no i think if they're currently your student they're not allowed to because there's like a you could get like a certain grade um a professor got a geology professor at my school got fired because of that he was like hooking up with a student and like giving her a's um i heard a rumor a spanish teacher at my school was doing that with the men she was a woman she was my spanish teacher in college yeah oh damn i i don't have any one i can ask i i honestly don't know if it's true or not damn was she hot no okay she's like

some weird granola lady well i was just thinking because like i could see people like starting rumors she's definitely um i mean for her age i mean she's like so fit oh hell yeah but to me she was just like kind of crunchy understood but not in like a cute way yeah you know yeah yeah it's always like hot crunchy and gross crunchy god i went to school in bellingham washington like everyone is fucking crunchy um do you remember hearing about mary kate letourneau the teacher in high school she was a high school teacher i think i mean i've heard of a few circumstances she was um hooking up with like a 14 year old and she ended up getting pregnant with his baby she was like in jail a couple stories like that they ended up getting married

and like having multiple kids she recently died like a few years like maybe like a year ago how old was she she had cancer she was like in her 50s i think have you ever noticed how like people who are really terrible always get cancer yeah damn like a lot of like serial killers die because they got cancer it's such an easy way out i know fucking rotten prison anyway anywho so yeah i'm just surprised i had never talked about that but he was he was an interesting case it was like kind of a bragging right for me for a while because i was like a kid and i look back on it now and i'm like that's so fucked up that power dynamic and he was such a dweeb like looking back on it now thinking about how he was total dweeb like what if what if a man his what if he hit on you now

you'd be like you're a fucking weirdo yeah he was like a like definitely a weird dude he was hot like definitely he was a beautiful man he took care of himself i bet he was like he there's either he's either the type of guy who was not hot in high school so he's like kind of fucking weird yeah um or he was super hot in high school and then women his own age are like your personality sucks and you're fucking weird and creepy yep so then he's just going for younger people he is has control over probably i think that he's definitely two things i can i think he recently got hot for sure he's also his mate he was getting his phd in math history which is like what are you planning on doing i think that's kind of interesting it is but like what are you doing

you're getting an advanced degree in math history like what are you gonna do you're just gonna be a professor go back in time and if your only option he wants to time travel to be the same age as you i'm waiting for you no but like if if your only like career path is to be a professor which really all you can do is write a book or be a professor with that phd that's all you can do don't fuck it up by maybe hooking up with students oh my god i should see if he does wow um what a niche i just because there are there are new hot people who are amazing yeah i love a new hot person hell yeah people are who are new to being hot are funny and interesting i feel like you can go one of two ways when you're new hot

yeah when you're new hot you just end up becoming like a heartthrob word and marrying someone really great or you resent all the people that uh didn't want to date you in the past damn and then you become some weird red pillar oh my god word i was um i had a huge crush in college on this guy who i ended up making out with once it was like my crowning achievement who was um overweight growing up and he lost a bunch of weight and like got a bunch of money and he was just like swaggy and like really like confident and just like always like spoiled everyone around him because he like didn't have anything and now he does but he still had like the heart of somebody that like never got attention and it was but not in like a way

that's like i want attention like in a way that's like he like appreciated the little things and it was the creme de la creme of like personality combination yeah you know like good for you like you went through it and it shows and i appreciate you as a person though so to put a little a little uh this is fascinating bookmark or what would we want to call this you're we're wrapping this up oh yeah put a little fork we're putting a fork in this convo stick a fork in it we're done that's what people oh i'm i meant like um to end the episode like what would we call this a little oh a hat a little to put a little to put a little top hat to cherry on top yeah a little cherry on top of this of our um gout dad episode i just love that um i want to talk about what

miss kimberly kardashian was quoted saying i believe it was vanity fair yeah um they were like kim what's your advice to working women and she's like my advice is get your ass up and fucking work thank you kimberly it's essentially just like the another rich person with generational wealth telling us all to stop being poor yeah my advice is to don't be poor have you thought of that none of this toxic work i so i have kind of there's kind of like a catch-22 with this because i think it's fucked up because i agree she has the generational wealth she has a lot of money to hire like child care house cleaners this is exactly what i was gonna say yeah like she is so wildly out of touch because like she she can work her ass off because she has time to work her ass

off yes so the way she is able to afford that time is because she has enough money to pay for child care to pay for people to do all of the daily shit that takes us so much time like cleaning our house doing our hair and makeup if we even want to fucking do that um making our food for us doing like daily communication and chores just and like even driving if you imagine how much you could get done if someone was driving you and you're you could just be on your phone doing work yeah and i mean i i have no doubt that kim probably does do a lot of shit of course i think her lifestyle is very demanding 100 however it's completely out of touch to think that anyone who doesn't have what she has is lazy yes this is also the other thing too is like she got

to do the boss bitch climb before having kids and not a lot of people get to do that i was thinking about that too and even like even like i don't we don't know what types of fertility care kim has access to but like those types of things like she could get a surrogate if she fucking wanted yeah you know she could get her eggs and she did she she did get a surrogate for her last i think last two kids honestly i have no idea oh i watched this shit religiously yeah see i didn't even know she had a surrogate but yeah see shit like that yeah you're not sacrificing your body your time your energy it's just like see this is my issue is because like as well as it was the same thing with kylie like everyone's so quick to like jump on the kardashians about shit and

she i mean kylie's a general you know what i mean like kylie was like listed like the like the first self-made billionaire under 30 or something i don't know yeah and she's not self-made she like came from like a really rich family and also she works hard but like the fact that like kim now has said like get off your ass and fucking work and we're all like kim we're dying kim people are dying yeah like it's like truly it's she's living a completely different reality than the rest of people well and she totally like i think her announcing or like basically confirming she has a relationship with pete davidson is a way to distract us all from being criticized from her fucking out of touch awful interview with vanity fair the devil works hard but chris jenner works

harder like well you should announce that you're dating pete davidson and then chris is like pete say some crazy shit to kanye oh my god wait hold on but that text thread incredible i've never been more attracted i woke up this morning i woke up for an 8 a.m meeting i had a sex dream about pete davidson this morning oh i'm so jealous oh and then i woke up and the meeting got fucking canceled and i was like i could have been fucking pete davidson right now you bitches but this liz had the great idea for our sex fact of the week what did you want to call this the more you ho hey the more you ho like the more you know you get it 90s kids yeah okay more you ho to talk about um what a stay-at-home mom would make well stay-at-home parent is actually the headline but

um if we're talking in terms of kim k stay-at-home mom fucking i love her i've defended you kim we were all rooting for you kim yeah we had your back with the kanye shit oh jesus and while i don't defend anything kanye's done i'm i'm just not gonna have your back anymore not that you need no we were really holding you up you're fucked now kim um but anyway liz had the idea to talk about what a stay-at-home parent would make and so i i've looked up investopedia.com i'm sure these numbers are different everywhere but this is the one this is the one that we saw i'm congested as fuck tested negative for covid i already said that according to 2019 data from salary.com if you are a stay-at-home parent and paid for your services you would be looking at

a median annual salary of 178 000 that's only the median that's the median so max would probably be around like 300 000 the median that's insane it says why because many stay-at-home parents work around the clock if you have young children work can often mean nighttime feedings greeting early morning risers and late night meal prep in addition a stay-at-home parent wears many hats and must employ many skills as a tutor negotiator nurse party planner and chef for starters it's so true you have a million my friends that are focusing all of my friends that have kids right now are working and then they come home and they take care of their kids and i'm like i can't tell you i'm tired of her uh my mom was getting her master's after having so like my brother and i

were both very young so she'd go to work go do her master's and then come home and be a fucking mom isn't that incredible when i talked to her i'm like how did you do that i simply would not and she's like i don't even like she's like i can't even tell you right you just don't even know yeah yeah my mom when she had my brother she was like an advertising executive boss bitch like running the show and she had a like a infant at home and i'm like i complain multiple times a day about having to work with a cat meowing in my face so i can't even imagine please when i do my to i have two dependents they are so dependent on me it's uh women are magic and i stay at home parents there are so many incredible stay-at-home dads as well but only just speaking from our

experience stay-at-home moms like kim k respectfully go fuck yourself on your your fucking comments she hasn't even apologized for it and she probably won't she probably won't i don't have any of the any of them apologize for anything ever yes what the pepsi thing did anyone actually think that anyone apologized for that um i know actually see they used their show as an opportunity to address like how remorseful they are for shit but like jordan woods we haven't had a conversation about how jordan woods was crucified for tristan fucking over chloe that's a conversation for another time but they are kind of pr masters like they it's all and they all they evade taxes by just having a fucking church oh a kardashian

church should we should start a church this is church could we evade taxes probably nice this is a joke government they're like well they spelled holy wrong but but it sounds like a church but we do have music that's a church song yeah our word is gospel so we do have a holy bible we've not published it we've not written it but it does exist in theory yeah it's kind of like the book of mormon where yeah an angel just we are you guys are the angels you come to us you are yeah right it's all symbiotic there you go government but here's i'm gonna file this audio in my tax returns don't tax me don't tax me bro yeah don't tax me bro i wonder how that guy is the how the don't

tase me bro guy is doing anyway this is going off the rails should we end it um all right we love you my hands are hold on liz my hands are especially we can do it like a catholic church where you're just like oh is this a catholic thing it's kind of like you're just like oh i don't really want to hold your hand because you're a stranger at church oh maybe i'm catholic did you ever do that nope oh and then that's when you do the peace be with you and also with you my child peace be with you and also with you anyways we love you our children Oh, yeah.