The Hoely Hour - E79 The More You Hoe!

Episode Date: March 25, 2022

Is Usher good at sex? Amelia has the answer! Liz and Amelia share a very special voicemail from a self-proclaimed "total catch" (who is apparently in jail now?) HOW IS HE SINGLE?! Why is everyone obsessed with your uterus? If someone is gonna be in there, they better pay rent. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Do you hear that? That sound, right? That means that summer's officially here. It means that grown adults just sprint into the street for a frozen dessert shaped like a cartoon. But this summer, Mint Mobile has a better treat. Every plan, including Unlimited, is $15 a month. And unlike ice cream, it won't drip down your wrist or look nothing like the picture. Does anyone have any cash? Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. Upfront payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months, or $180 for a 12-month plan required.

$15 per month equivalent. Taxes and fees extra. New customer offer for initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes. me slow when network is busy see terms okay and then you sing that beautifully actually i want you to know that thank you so much i've been practicing since the early 2000s welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia samson and i'm liz ball and i'm a dumbass and forgot my entire laptop today so we're using amelia's full size monitor i kind of dig it though i pulled out all my stuff and i was like i forgot the thing the the main thing that i need

so you were very calm when you said it to me you were like i forgot my laptop i was like we're definitely we've been struggling today has been actually yes everything that's gone wrong has gone or that could go wrong has gone wrong oh yeah like the construction outside we were late to like getting started because both of us needed to take a nap and then i was at a point where like if you you know when i say this like i was so tired that i did not want to put shoes on putting shoes on was an inconvenience to me wow that sounds like me when i was depressed maybe that's what's happening i don't know maybe i'm missing a nail oh my god i broke too that's that shit that's how it be it'd be like that it took us an hour and a half to get

fully set up yeah i'm an hour and a half now into my second adderall we also spent a second adderall did i tell you i got prescribed a second i got prescribed night adderall because nighttime adderall yeah because i like work during the day and then i do all the shit that like i don't really care about at night and i'm out of adderall how is that's gonna how's that gonna affect your i have immediate release for she's prescribed i almost said our psychiatrist name um she's prescribed it to me for like 4 p.m onward so it doesn't fuck with my sleep because it's just four hour stuff but i take it at seven because that's when my xr wears off i sound like a complete addict i probably am um but it helps me focus so here we are so one of my friends um

works at uh i don't really know what you call it but anyway she like helps diagnose people with things and since like autism has like become such a thing on tiktok yeah yeah everybody comes in like wanting an autism diagnosis and i think that that's so interesting that's such an interesting cultural shift because like before it was like don't vaccinate your kids they're gonna get autism it was like the scariest thing in the world like you would rather your kid have whooping cough than autism yeah and now it feels like people are like hoping to get a diagnosis to like explain the things that they have always been insecure about um but people are saying things are autism and adhd that aren't exactly that's why i'm like i'm not gonna like self-diagnose here right and i'm

not gonna assume anything right but then there are things it's all spectrum too it's like oh yeah you know just like sexuality baby there's no standard way of being a person no wouldn't that be nice and also kind of sad it would be yes it would help guide it a little bit people want rules they want there to be rules and that's why everyone gets so mad oh my god on the internet about everything um speaking of being mad on the internet uh i so uh i'm sure some of you might know amelia and i made a tiktok um we're doing a voiceover of a male hosted podcast we made it y'all it's called good bro bad bro and as a podcast who also puts videos on tiktok i was like okay maybe they're just posting hyperbolic stuff because it gets clicks yeah and we put our most

like eyebrow raising conversations on tiktok for the same reason yeah um so we were like okay let's I not we me yesterday when I was high I was like I'll give it a chance I'll listen and respectfully it is the dumbest shit I've ever heard I was pretty disappointed because I was like they they'll like start to say something that like you're like oh where are they gonna go with this because this could be a really good point that's the worst and then they'll like flip it and then they'll be like and that's why women are fucking stupid god it's like tripping right when you get to the finish line yeah you're like no you almost made it um and then they kept saying stuff like that was like transphobic and homophobic and misogynist but it was like it was

they're also 24 so i was like you know what for a 24 year old man i i it's not great it's sop standard operating prestige yeah they're trying um but i think they're also like all the women in our comments have like blue hair and they're unattractive i'm like that's such a boring they're republican men call all liberal women like blue-haired commies i'm like yeah and that they're like not attractive so then i went to their comments and i was like looking at the profiles i was like as a bisexual person smash in the comments smash every single one did not pass on anyone people in our comments started fighting with each other about what does and does not count as a hobby and i hate to be the person to deliver this but as um our favorite person kyle prue said

we're not gatekeeping activities no we're not doing that we're not doing that we're not gonna gatekeep activities no and um also we're all working 40 hours a week you don't need to have a hobby it's very it feels very insecure to get on someone else about what they do as a hobby uh-huh it's like what are you gaining by doing that like why does that feel good also one of my favorite comments is like and that's why you'll be single forever and i'm like one i'm not two why is being single or alone a bad thing right like to me that's just you saying like you don't know how to be alone it's just like they i love my company right you'll be alone you'll be single forever it's like yeah fingers crossed i'm just kidding i'm lonely inside uh uh like jokes on you

this is the last man this is he knows you've told him yes and then he said this is for you boys i'm not joking i love that he said this one's for you boys i love that and that's why i love him he's a little cutie he's taking it seriously as a responsibility literally the last man standing that is a responsibility in terms of me and my vagina these these boys recycle the same insults in places that very clearly don't make sense to recycle them oh no i got a comment today on i posted about cellulite a few weeks ago and i got a comment today that was like it was a picture of me from the back and like it's a full body photo you know but it's of my ass and someone commented and they were like i'm gonna do an

impression if you really loved your cellulite ass you would have zoomed in on it hello and so i went to his profile zero pictures of himself and i was like this is rich i am convinced these people are guys that wouldn't match like you wouldn't match with no hell no and also like so bold to be like if you really felt good about yourself and then like not have any photos of yourself it was all just like recycled if you really felt good about yourself you'd zoom in on your ass yeah i'd be like if you really wanted to see my ass you would pay me for it so you stupid fuck um anyway i texted you last night uh a idea that i convinced myself is going to happen i would love to hear your rationale i'm gonna walk you all through it i texted amelia she's at a movie

a premiere of a short she was in and i knew that but i was gonna text her my ideas anyways because she celebrates them and that's all i need down um i'm convinced that kim kardashian's gonna run for president so i'll walk you through it this woman was on tiktok i should have saved it i saw it on twitter she was explaining that um like the statement kim kardashian made and how strong relationships she has with political figures and other figures with a lot of money like jeff bezos um her statement on encouraging people to work hard in like the capitalist socialist society that we live in is uh she was basically reaching that she thinks that that was she said that on purpose she knows what she's doing she said that on purpose

and um thinks it is in the long term going to be like a political statement and i was like bro she like celebrities are doing presidents now so that's true that's true and the level of influence this woman has just in in terms of like yeah influence and power um like she is very financially influential and she appeals to a lot of people she would get crucified absolutely and then i was like there's so many pros and cons to this because i would love to have a woman with a sex tape in office oh hell yeah um because women are exploited in that manner all the time and this was my one issue with the criticism from the trump presidency was the

criticism against melania for being like in like nude magazines it's like who gives a single fuck there we have a recording of this man saying that he wants to grab a woman by the pussy and we're concerned did you hear the woman this woman like who she was doing like a man on the street interview with like someone on tiktok and he was saying her whole point was like well no one accused obama of sexual assault like saying that like she thinks that he has and women like liberal women just don't want to speak up because he is a liberal president hello so she's just like checkmate liberals instead of like this man isn't accused of assault because he hasn't assaulted anyone so it also says a lot about our her general perception of men is that they assault

women yeah right right that's it's honestly checkmate and also it's just such the whole straw man fallacy of like like doing like a well look over there to like ignore what's going on over here it's like we're over that now girl then my blood is boiling last night i was listening to a podcast talking about the royal family and how it operates like a cult almost yeah um it and i was like bro the kardashians though so we'll see i would love to see if in the near future that i'm correct and she does end up running for some sort of political office maybe like senate well because arnold schwarzenegger was a governor so oh yeah yeah that was a weird time yeah and um it's not it's not too far-fetched i mean she was married to kanye yeah who was like

had a whole political campaign i like i i like the idea of him being like i'm gonna run for president and then in the background she's just like okay yeah how can i get in on that you know who actually would be better in office me she's like people shit on her but like taking a bar without going to law school is like really fucking hard well also i i sincerely believe she is very smart her dad famous lawyer her mom is a fucking mogul like brilliant woman the way they get around paying taxes i'm just like how do you think about a level of intelligence she just her mom is running the whole show oh yeah so yeah i don't know i i think she's just a smart person and smarter than we think she is and a lot of that has to do with people being prejudiced

towards women with vocal fry yeah yeah and people just like have an idea about the kardashians without actually like putting any effort into figuring any of it out you know i might be one of those people but also like i'm not gonna watch your show i'm sorry i just i don't want to i love them and shamelessly i'm mad at kim though i just keep up on twitter with whatever's going on i finally saw the clip of her saying what she said on vanity fair and it's annoying yeah like it's annoying to read but it's annoying to hear it's i it was so much worse when i heard it yeah because she was like so aggressive right actually i don't like using that word for women she was just like well it was very um yeah she was kind of like shamey about it yeah anyway get

off your ass and work nobody wants to shut the fuck up kim shut up who who who yeah who were who is this directed toward yeah who do you think doesn't want to work right that's true it could have been like a verbal subtweet like yeah honestly maybe it's like courtney doesn't want to work but courtney was on the other side like that is so true i like the idea of courtney saying that being like satirical yeah maybe yeah because yeah that's a whole thing with her i'll bring up the first it was another conversation we had at the bachelor party and i said i wouldn't talk about anything else from the bachelor party but this isn't incriminating it came up and honest to god do not remember how it came up but i put it in my notes in my phone

and i had to reach into the deep recesses of my subconscious to remember what the fuck this note meant i wrote usher bad at sex question mark let it burn deep down you know what's best for yourself but you this is a this is a musical podcast at this point um we break into song a lot but we were discussing as i dug through my subconscious i remembered we were discussing how okay i have a metaphor when i was studying in italy they told us all of the restaurants that were around like the major tourist spots are all very very bad because they don't have to build up clientele because they're all tourists so they don't have to like do a good job and they don't have to be like good to anyone that's coming by because they're just like passing through

we were having a conversation about how someone like usher probably doesn't have to be good at sex because there's no drought you know what i mean like people are like and usher was just an example i mean this is like for like any hot celebrity with like you know clout but like you don't have to actually put in any effort to be good at sex because you probably won't have sex with that person again if you're this like sex icon that's just like fucking around and i hadn't really thought about it like that you're not building up clientele you can literally just lay there but they always have people sign ndas before they have sex with them like justin bieber lots of do you remember when that woman like in brazil recorded herself leaving justin bieber's room

and it was like his back was to the camera but you could see his tattoos was that the one that you're talking about yeah i think so and then she was like but like fucking love that i thought that was funny however any that's so true i i don't know i have i'm i'm thinking about the idea of how weird it is to want to sleep with someone because they're famous yeah yeah i think it's like a conquest kind of thing i was out this is actually a something that i was thinking about as like somebody that's been recently on dating apps and sees a lot of dating apps how attractive it is to me to see someone that doesn't work at amazon so it's like when you heard it here first yeah hit me up if you don't work at amazon boys that i feel bad for guys who work at amazon because

that they're like i had to take it out of my dating profile yeah i believe it but i don't know it's a good job a job's a job we're all doing our best working at amazon is fucking hard not knocking you for that but there's just a million of you because it's seattle you know so like whenever i come across anybody that doesn't work at amazon i'm like oh what's that and then there's like there are a few different specific brands of amazon boy like where they like think their dick is enormous because they work there and you're like oh yeah yeah every guy and then the fuck boys work at microsoft like word yeah there are different like there's like a lot of like the eddie bauer and rei crew too whole different breed of man we have a lot of nordstrom that's a

different breed of man i've never met a nordstrom man i've only obviously met um the men that work in the women's shoe department at nordstrom are very strategically sexy interesting because i will buy all of the shoes from them that's probably on purpose it is it's remarkable remarkable marketing huh but i was thinking like the benefits not benefits or but like the the perceived benefits of sleeping with a celebrity is like if i'm thinking deep about it and not just like i just want to say that i did like somebody that is passionate enough about something to pursue it and get like notoriety for doing that thing is really sexy you know yeah it's like oh my god like they put in so much work into getting this thing done i can understand why

that would there would be draw there but unfortunately i really think a lot of people just sleep with celebrities because it's like they want to say that they did yeah but then they have them sign ndas but also how would you feel as a celebrity well like knowing that that's why people want to sleep with you is because it's like right a sort of conquest yeah i mean it's like kind of a gross feeling like feeling and it's like on such a small scale for me i was talking about this with moscow feeling like a conquest with him like that was such like a like okay cool you conquered it you know and like okay bye like that's a really shitty feeling oh yeah you have to get into a mindset as a celebrity of just like well if i'm if i'm opting into this i have to know

this like might be the outcome which sucks but it's like drake having to put hot sauce in the condom you know allegedly it's like it's one of those things it's like they have to think differently about these interactions that they have but i don't think usher there's no way usher's good at sex and i'm i will die on that hill i would die on the hill there's no way he's bad at it oh interesting i think that he just are we good bro bad broing right now we're doing maybe two sides of the argument he he comes up i this is actually probably how it came out off we were listening to early 2000s music and yes oh my god this is all coming back to me about how like sexual he is and just how he carries himself and i was like i bet he's so fucking good in bed and

then somebody else was like i bet he's not because and that's such a it's just such an interesting point i would trust you over a man though does this man fuck men i don't think so so that's i would trust you over him because you have had sex with men so yeah so that's my that's my devil's advocate debate is because um the best sex you've had do they carry themselves in a sexy way yes I'm because I'm also thinking on my past experiences while you're answering too because I'm like okay um Mr. Liz is absolutely the best ex I've ever had and he was very hot the second I saw him like yeah I just always thought he was hot I thought that when I looked at his profile yeah it's always interesting to think about I always think about like

i mean we it's no secret the best sex i've had is man r.i.p right when i met him i was like i'm going i'm going to fuck this guy and all of my friends that are dating someone say the same thing about the first impression that they had so it it has to be like an in-person vibe yeah right because like i'm not trying to fuck any of my friends boyfriends you know what i mean and they're all like most fuckable person i've ever met and i'm like okay good like that's great so it has to just be like a pheromone yeah huh chemistry brain chemistry kind of moment yeah maybe it do we have any scientists listening tell us tell us okay this this was from an account called at dre christina d-r-e-k-r-i-s-t-i-n-a she plays two voicemails and i'm gonna add it in i'm

gonna add in the first voicemail here uh and then we'll discuss yeah hi they're all good Thanks, Dimitri. Sorry I had to leave such a rushed message with you when we met the other day. I just want to quickly give you my phone number, and I had to get the heck out of the area. In any event, I figure I'd better leave you a more detailed message and explain why I approached you. I am single. I have no trouble meeting women. I mean, women approach me six, seven times a day. But I'm very particular about what I like. You're extremely elegant. I couldn't take my eyes off of you, and your friends were very jealous.

Even if they say they weren't, they were envious of the fact that I approached you, and I was very taken by you. Elegant women are very rare. I'm Greek, and I'm very particular about what I like. So I'm giving you an opportunity here. I don't know if you pick up the messages on the weekend, but I'm working on a movie script, so I'm pretty much around all weekend doing that. I left you my number, 416-9184.

This looks like a landline, and if it is, you may not get the message until Monday. But when you do, call me, and then we'll get together for coffee and chat and let the romance begin. You look very taken aback by my approach, and I hope that isn't timidness. I hope it was just a little bit of shock at being approached so directly, because I don't really date timid women, because I'm a very direct, very passionate, very assertive man. and I want a woman who's very independent and strong so anyway we'll talk about that but I just wanted to formally introduce myself now I have I leave the ball in your court you call me as soon as you have the courage to okay Olga talk to you soon bye I have can you first of all can

you imagine listening to your voicemail and hearing something like this like what like yes because i am not surprised that a man did this but also like the layers the levels the there's a lot to there's a lot to break right here the very clear like devout following to red pill forums i have a lot of women approaching me but i'm very picky six or seven times a day i'm like no yeah they're probably like can i take your order i'm like are they just people on public transit saying good morning like but but even so like how many times when you're out in public do men approach you because i'm just gonna operate under the assumption that you and i are both more attractive than this man yeah because i also think that women are more attractive than men

and i also think that men approach women more often 100 so those are just the assumptions i'm making and maybe i'm wrong but i do think generally men approach women more often than women approach men because women are usually considering their safety and if it's not like an appropriate time i feel like most people are like i'm gonna mind my own business until you know you're out doing something and then you're like hey yeah you're cute i just like there his whole like getting approached six or seven times a day um i'm gonna be i'm gonna be uh over the weekend working on a movie script it's like there's just so much shit that's like he's just like dropping things that he thinks is gonna work yeah oh yeah i'm working on a movie

script this has never worked and this is the issue with guys that follow this kind of like know how many dudes i know have worked on a movie script yeah or said that yeah like it's on it's so it's what fucks me up so much about like this kind of mentality of like what works for women is it doesn't and then that's because they don't ask women right works for women exactly but then they use that to fuel like the fact that like women are like useless and like don't know anything and like they're low quality they just they use this negative like response to their shit to perpetuate their hate for for women and it's fucking gross and thinking in the larger picture of things like the ideas and hatred towards women that they have that's learned they learned that yeah and

it's so deeply ingrained in every corner of the world like yeah um just what we even talked about last week the nomadic lifestyle changing from nomads to landowning people yeah and land becoming valuable and essentially that leading to hating women's sexuality like men have been taught to be repulsed by women yeah and um all these thoughts are unoriginal and that's i think that's what i think is like like challenge your mindset like when when men are like body hair is disgusting i'm like body hair on women existed so commonly before this and like you're gonna beat your chest and say like we need to do things like how we did them in the past right like women weren't shaving their armpits like you were marketed that idea yeah i was just about to say

that you didn't even come up with that no i don't know challenge just challenge yourself a teeny tiny bit just a little bit it just takes like a little tiny like extension of thinking to like challenge what you believe and see that what you believe is flawed because like like you're saying it's and it's the same thing with cellulite like the beauty industry has created issues out of something that isn't to make money and body hair is the same thing like oh yeah it was to make money hello you fucking moron women do student no shut the fuck up shut up like what this is not this is not something that like we've created such a pageantry out of just like being with a partner it's insane like at what point do you no longer know the person you're trying to date

i it's weird it's it is and it's it's exhausting to think about too it's really interesting how men like this like the one that left the voicemail like like they try to make themselves come off as like so confident oh yeah just peacocking so hard it swings back to the other end of yeah you're so wildly insecure yeah um but i also love that he called her elegant yeah that is i'm obsessed it's iconic i love it i actually think that's like an understated compliment like elegant you're so elegant i'd be like i've never once been called i know i'm like my i'm constantly slouching i am folded in half like a fucking panini i yeah i whenever people are like um what do your friends call you it's never amelia because it's like far far too elegant

of a name i call you amelia i know but like what you could you can just not if you wanted to you do call me amelia i think you're like really the only person that is consistently a part of my day that calls me amelia yeah everyone else calls me mealy i don't know but it'd be weird if you said me say mealy mealy yeah that doesn't feel right no well and then my daughter my brother's daughter's name is millie my friend's kind of name is and i do love her well so we're one in the same um that i guess it would be like if you called me elizabeth yeah i was just about to say that elizabeth is an elegant name it is and i am not an elegant person you don't strike me as an elizabeth at all but it's because i've known you as liz yeah it took me a while to realize that

your name was elizabeth i'm gonna be honest i i identify with liz deeply hi there olga it's Dimitri calling again, the guy from the street. I left you a message several days ago. You said you were interested. Now, here's the way I work. I don't like leaving second messages, but I like you. You're a very elegant woman. You're very attractive.

But, you know, I don't play that game. I know your friends tell you not to return calls. You're playing games like you see on stupid TV shows. So here's how it's going to work. It is now 4.30 on Wednesday. Now, I'll assume, I'll assume that you've already left work, because, you know, some people leave early, and I'll grant you that.

But if I do not receive a phone call back from you by 3 o'clock Thursday afternoon, I'm no longer interested, and you can erase my number. I don't play games like that. I'm completely single. I'm very intelligent. I'm great in bed. i make great money believe it or not i'm a complete catch i've only been single four months

i had a long distance relationship you know when a year it's very tough to maintain it like that and it didn't work out there's nothing wrong what the fuck it's like the how are you trying to convince yourself that you're a catch are you trying to convince her that you're a catch i think might be a little bit of both it's that i have so many i have an array of emotions right now um because i feel some secondhand embarrassment for sure um i'm also sad for this man they're like he's trying so hard he's trying so hard and like that's none of us want to be alone you know right but like we all want a partner i know and he's trying he's trying so hard and he's being so gracious misled by these fucking dumb ass creepy guys he's listening to these fucking

idiots with like honestly it it is really frustrating as two women who host a sex and dating podcast just seeing men like march on the internet and doing no thought or external research or like we try our very best to be inclusive and everyone knows that we are often like complimented about it people express that they that's why they like listening because we do try to be inclusive without speaking on behalf of people that we do not represent so like well said And I just it's so frustrating seeing these dumb ass guys who, to be quite honest, they're they're ugly and they're ugly guys. And it's not as exciting to say after being so gracious with everything. I know, but they're just like these ugly guys who are mad at women.

And like, I think that we are open minded enough to to be like, it doesn't matter how you look. yeah because i've dated guys that like are more attractive than me or less attractive than me um and it doesn't the reason i like them was not because of how they look but it's just like when who you are as a person is so like hateful um the way you look is just mirrored by that and i can't help but notice it like i notice when people are ugly when their personality is ugly 100 otherwise it's not something i think about no i feel the same way about acne like i don't notice acne unless the person sucks oh that's interesting i don't know maybe i just walk around with like uh rose colored glasses on just like i assume every like until you suck like

you're beautiful to me yeah right so i was i noticed this as a kid watching legally blonde in theaters i remember this so clearly chutney was like when she was being awful to l i was like why is he with her she's awful and then when they oh you mean um vivian vivian who's chutney chutney is the one who murders the dad oh my god yeah um or doesn't murder the dad oh chutney's the daughter yeah chutney's the daughter spoiler alert why am i forgetting linda cartellini it's linda carnellini who plays chutney it is uh-huh you didn't know that no she was iconic linda carnellini well damn i love her vivian not chutney we don't like chutney yeah vivian you're like um selma blair is vivian yes selma blair bombshell stunning but when she was being when she was

written as like a bitch i was like ew and then she got nice to ellen i was like she's really pretty all of a sudden because because even Elle Woods says like well she could do some mascara but she unfortunately is like or she's not unfortunate looking or something like that and then you're like yeah she is pretty yeah but when she was written mean she wasn't to me so yeah and like so I noticed that as a kid it's like if you're an awful person it shows on your face it just does like did you um well especially to children too that's how they're perceiving children are like the most that's why when kids like have an opinion about things it's so scary because they're just like unfiltered like unbiased opinions what are you gonna say to me like are you gonna hurt my

feelings get out of here somebody tweeted yesterday that they were um out in public and a kid oh it was um uh what was her name schnitt oh my god why am i oh ellie schnitt ellie schnitt she was out in public and this kid was just like staring at her and then just like exclaimed to the whole restaurant I don't like her hair it's just kids are just that way you know what I mean I'd be devastated oh my god I would be so I would be I would be it's a child so I know they're telling the truth exactly that's the thing it's like having this thought as a kid of like this person is not as pretty when they're being mean feels like the most unbiased honest way of looking at things you know it's like I can say like oh you're ugly about somebody that I don't like but like

that's actually they if when somebody is mean they look worse it's just the way that it is it's that's so true yeah that's so true so that's why like when i see these podcasts with these like fucking guys with rat mustaches saying like this is how you should get women and then they're also not treating women in these conversations as like empathetic beings yeah i think that's just what's so frustrating it's just like watching these like fucking misogynistic stupid red pill men claiming that they have the secret to sleeping with women yeah and they give you the same regurgitated bullshit advice that doesn't work it doesn't work and like maybe it's occasionally worked for them when women are like intoxicated in the club or something but they're like the

games that they're playing i highly doubt those are the things that they do and that works for them like no like i said no one's asking women no of course not and then when women say what they like and want it's minimized and they're like no that's not what you want well because that would be that would be because it goes against everything that they've learned exactly it goes against a patriarchy it goes against what men like to tell each other and how they impress each other that's it there's a lot of like you know dick measuring going on like they're always they're always trying to impress each other yeah they want to fuck women to impress men that's weird yeah that is that is objectively strange as fuck right but like this is what i was saying

before too i mean i see this on like dating profiles all the time of people being like women fucking suck this is what i want you have to be under 130 pounds and da da da da da it's like you've never seen clearly doesn't right you have no idea what that looks like but you this has never worked for you and you're using the fact that it never worked for you to further fuel your hatred for women but it doesn't make any fucking sense because women are not a part of the equation anywhere in that you're just like it's this like sphere that they're living in of like trying to take advice from people that aren't it's not working for the people giving the advice but they're taking it as gospel and for what like what are their credentials like what what gave these

guys like the like messiah stature that these people like treat them as having there they have no credentials if we're gonna stay if we're gonna mention a statistic or something we cite our sources we like say what we're reading or where we got this or who we got this from right like if i'm crediting the source you can go look into it and if we ever give advice on anything we're like this is like how we would handle it and that's none of these guys are giving advice that way no no no this is how you have to be bro this is yeah this is fact and that is the thing that really sucks well and then i'm like okay they're 24 like their brain's not done developing i think it is really disheartening seeing men be like this is how you get women and not and at the end

of the day everyone's goal is companionship yeah it's not just sleeping with someone and even if you're sleeping like that is your goal that's fine but at the end of the day like people do want companionship where they know that the person that they're with is trustworthy they can be accepted in themselves around them like we also seek the same thing in our friendship so it's not far-fetched to say we don't want the same thing in a romantic partner someone that we are like being physically intimate with right so i don't know i that's just not the way to accomplish companionship no it's not it's it's just like yeah i'm just like this is how you have game boys like i the the game only appeals to men right talk to women if you're trying to date women talk to women

about how to date women that it it just is such an obvious fix it why is it even why is it even contentious like why do you need to be listening to these guys that what somebody used the phrase bitchless behavior and it's it's my favorite fucking i love saying it i love saying it it's you have no bitches you have zero bitches you are in bitch debt yep you can't even get a bitch loan at the bitch bank we were a little all over the place with that but i think the same sentiment stands is just like we keep seeing this kind of like red pill shit regurgitated and i don't know it's it's old it's tired i want to see something new let's get creative fellas yeah you know and i do try and have some like understanding because i was a fucking idiot when

i was like 24 not that that's an excuse but i'm trying to be like understanding like you don't have the parts of your brain it's true it's scientifically true that collectively our brains aren't like fully done until 25 i really just love like the slight burn of like so your brain isn't all there it's not okay think about how you felt between like so like 25 to 26 oh totally you change so much but so compare 26 to just 24 the issue and yes that explains a lot of these guys but like they almost i think it explains women too because i was a dumbass but they don't they don't change like these people that think this way and what scares me the most is that they are the silent majority they really are like there are so many of them guys that i respect hashtagging

red pill in some of their posts and i'm like hello no yeah it fucking sucks and it's like oh how many of that is it it's an iceberg like we're just seeing the tip and those are the ones that feel bold enough to fucking exclaim it online and start podcasts and be polarizing for the sake of being polarizing but there's all this shit underneath the surface i hate it like if what you want is to be loved and accepted for who you are go to therapy please it's just too much work well because when you feel that way about yourself you're not gonna like do all this like pageantry bullshit to try and like win approval for someone that you're not right because you are okay being yourself and like it sure rejection fucking sucks no one likes being rejected it's a

bad feeling but like at the end of the day if you feel good enough about yourself that you can walk away from that without one feeling upset at the other person for wanting to end a relationship with you and then two like sure yeah you can be disappointed and sad but not being mad at them specifically and then to value yourself enough to be like this hurts but I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me yep that's like that's how I feel now like if someone doesn't want to be with me or if I don't want to be with someone like it doesn't matter what our differences are I think both of us deserve to be with someone who enthusiastically wants to be with us 100% yes and the only way you can accomplish that is by cutting this pageantry bullshit yeah and

and it's really like that you have to think about and i think this is really what you're saying is like you have to think about the type of person that you are attracting is that by being like this shit person is that the actual kind of person that you want to be with and maybe it is like maybe these guys want someone that's just like whatever you say and i want to know who that works for who does it work for where you put all this shit in your bio that has nothing to do with you or who you are but only what you are demanding another person be for you i just don't this isn't sims my guy i don't think it must not i'm sure i'm sure there are plenty of women who do the same thing it must not work it can't it must not because like unless they have like fucking case

studies existing on these like forums or like good bro bad bro has like shit that has worked for people that have listened to their podcast you do a social experiment explain what if we make a fake dating profile with that kind of shit and see what happens like a catfish profile yes but we're like almost anti-catfishing because we're scaring them away yeah but what pictures would we use i don't know we'd have to find someone who would be okay with us using their pictures hmm we'll figure it out but i think this is worth literally experimenting with people have asked me to do this on tiktok a lot like i think we should do it i think it would make sense it's just i get caught up in like the who who or who am i going to use pictures of but we'll figure it

out maybe squints oh poor squints hey can we make you a red pillar he would be kind of into it honestly he's such he's such a good like ally to women he's like do whatever you fucking need to take him down i like i would say mr liz but i think he'd be like absolutely not yeah i was gonna say i was gonna suggest mr liz but no he doesn't he gets nervous when i just talk about karaoke one last real full thought that i wanted to share is about some fertility frustrations uh i wrote down fertility annoyances because uh i know i've been very like public with everyone about my health stuff and what i'm going through right now um i actually so for our patreon listeners i am having my surgery today and for our regular listeners on fridays i have already

had it but um i'm having a leap procedure which i believe i said when i talked about it before it's like a potato peeler potato peeler to the cervix she's taking 10 of my cervix and leaving me 90 she explained it wow four millimeters whoa um but she also explained type 16 hpv it is just one lesion that grows larger oh and type 18 has multiple lesions so there's no way for them to know if they fully got a lesion with like type 18 it's much more complicated to deal with so i thought that was really interesting information you have 16 i have type 16 okay so she was like thank god it's not 18 because that shit sucks and she's really candid with me she's like fuck that i love her oh my god she is amazing and like she wanted she's the one who recommended that i be

unconscious for this because she's like if you are not moving i can like get everything well or not she can be very precise if i'm not moving if i'm not awake so that's why she wants me unconscious and it's because i have anxiety so i also think once i see like oh they're prescribed like prozac or lexapro or whatever like yeah they're like maybe you shouldn't be you have to like fast the day before um i can i have to stop eating at 7 a.m can you oh okay yeah can you drink water and stuff um i can only drink water and gatorade that's good yeah and then up to like two hours before but um yeah so I'm doing that on Thursday and I feel really good about it yeah good I've been trying to also like kind of um mentally and emotionally align myself with like okay having

this done I want to like have the idea that like just these negative experiences that I want to let go of i'm gonna make part of this so i want to say goodbye to like that things that weigh me down or like bad habits and stuff like that and i really do believe in the power of like thought oh my god so um that's just kind of what i'm trying to like put in my head because it makes you feel more prepared yeah for something to be like yes i want i'm ready to say goodbye to this part of my body yeah I honestly I'm acting like I'm dying and I'm not well no but I think it's good to like kind of make a ritual around it yeah making that that's the word I was looking for making a ritual does make it feel like this is such a like connected body experience and another

reason like the biggest thing to circle to my main point um with like the fertility frustrations so I had someone reach out to me with a handwritten letter about um this person is a medical professional and they wanted to tell me to preserve my fertility so here I am opening this letter thinking that it's going to be like legit medical advice and like don't worry this is so common here's what you can expect and i'm thinking of you just like words that are like calming and affirming and like scientifically reinforced and instead this person wrote to me to say you don't know what you're gonna want in your future who you'll be with so um you should consider like the best way to preserve your fertility if possible and i was so disappointed

and sad oh my god i would have been so fucking sad it sucked i was just like i already have my own mom freaking out about it and i read this letter to my mom and she's like well that comes from like such a place of love and i'm like i'm not she's like such a generational difference oh yeah and then she was like would you be upset if i said that and then i was like no but you're my mom and you're not a medical professional so of course i expect that from you right yeah yeah and she's like would you be upset I'm like of course I'd be upset and I was like it's so the main frustration to me is that first of all I'm not in a place to have children that I would want to be in like in the situation I want to have children I want to have a partner

right and I also want to be like physically ready there I want to I love doing my research yeah you know that about me right yeah i want to be prepared to like take on having to be in charge of a person for the rest of my life totally totally that's what you are signing up for yeah you know like i've even today i was thinking about amanda bynes conservatorship like hers is you know what conservative her conservatorship is what they're supposed to be like yeah she had a drug abuse problem she was getting in so much legal trouble and having her parents be able to help intervene legally with their adult child like a good parent would want to do that yes and then when it's when like they're good to handle it on their own they're out of the conservatorship yep yep and

that's what happened she's like i'm doing well i have a kid that's good parenting maybe she's married i don't she has a kid yeah amanda bines has a child yo yeah damn or she maybe she's about to have a child i don't know holy cow anyways but just that was the biggest frustration i'm like people are prioritizing some a hypothetical person that does not even exist so that was the biggest frustration to me i'm like my health is my priority right now my life is the only thing i am in charge of yeah this is the like for you to prioritize my fertility and some like a child that doesn't exist there's something that is just like it makes you feel objectified in a different way like not in a non-sexualized way you feel like okay i'm just like this baby vessel right

and I'm not a person I think too you were at a tipping point when you got this letter because like yeah I didn't I was waiting yeah for my results too to see if I had cancer yeah and you had been hearing this from multiple people of like are you still going to be able to have kids and then you hear it from a medical professional and it's just like like why is this you of all people right why is this the feedback that I'm getting from everybody about something that is so scary to me like I don't I'm not thinking about kids right now I'm just not like can we talk about this like when we know that i'm okay yes hello it's just like it's just so out of line and then when i told mr liz he's like why wouldn't they think you were already doing that like

considering that yeah because i had i had made it clear to like anyone who talked to me about it like if i don't have kids i want that to still be my choice i don't want to not have kids because I'm unable to it's nobody's business but yours exactly and that's what we've been saying is my body my choice and this is just a thing that like women always have to worry about with like oh like you don't want kids like well you're gonna change your mind it's like yeah my therapist and I talked about this literally last week and I was like my mom is backed off talking to me about it and then she was like yeah because you will be able to have children for at least another decade and and then i was just like i don't know what i'm gonna do if i still don't have them yeah because

i didn't want them like how i don't know it's just really frustrating and i'm like why have we made women believe that they have to have kids to have a fulfilled life like how many shitty parents do you know how many fucked up kids do you know so many like yeah some people aren't meant to be parents and they shouldn't be yeah but i mean this goes back to the conversation about like why like women's sexuality stopped being celebrated was because like then there would be like all of these babies that like nobody would know who they belonged to women's women are only valued like we're still getting the aftershocks of that mentality that you're only valued as a way to carry on the name that's it and carry on the wealth absolutely that's it and

it's like that's not that's becoming less and less the case that like and people prefer having sons because they know that a boy is going to have an easier time right and i don't believe that's true like societally yeah but emotionally no we've we've really fucked over both genders here by even making gender a construct in the first place i like i always wonder how i would have developed as a person if i didn't have all of these external like made-up ideologies pushed on me totally there are a lot of parents now that are like not a lot there are a handful of parents now that are raising their children with no gender like constructs at all and seeing what they choose and i think that that's a really interesting take i think it's interesting too i

love that i think regardless of that i would have gravitated towards super girly stuff no matter what like i have always loved really feminine things um and i still do so i think that but i would have liked to see how like my sexuality would have developed growing up if that had been like accepted yeah and understood rather than just like you're either gay or you're straight because there are actually other sexualities so newsflash they're like and then whatever we could talk about this another time i feel like i could go on about this for like another hour um but you had a sex i have a sex fact of the week sex fact of the week wait did we do more you we did not i was thinking about that um follow us on tiktok twitter instagram at the holy hour

we are now officially doing very well on tiktok so please help us keep that going because we're turning some people on the podcast be nice on in the comments oh that's such a tall fucking order on tiktok i know but everyone that's listening we know you'll be nice in the comments um uh holy hour podcast at gmail.com for your some best stories subscribe to us on patreon join the discord you get ad free and early access to episodes on patreon and really cute conversation on discord and that's the discord the discord's free you don't have to be part of the page yeah yeah it's in our link tree um and it's cute as fuck they are having a movie night today i feel like they're always having a movie night when we're recording whether that's monday

or tuesday i know it always ends up it always ends up when we're recording we would love to join sometime and but like we've said before it does low-key feel like you know mom and dad like i know i found out some of the people i manage they um have like other chats with each other i know i'm like that's so sweet and i like low-key want to be part of them but also i understand like you don't want the manager in the chat when the cat's away the mice will play i know i'm happy for them i think they're so precious anyways i have my sex fact is more of a marriage fact i have some divorce facts and i because i can't remember um i was like scrolling through something and then it was like 50 of marriages end in divorce and we've all heard

that statistic but i was like is that even still true so it i went down this rabbit hole of like learning about divorce facts love this i was wondering why you went down this rabbit hole you texted me you're like i'm reading divorce facts i was like is this well yeah i was just like okay we've all heard this but i think that number has decreased so i wanted to do some research and um i didn't cite my sources but i just googled them and some of them were like the top you know when you can like press like related questions yes is like that okay it's all on the first page of google yeah you just look up divorce statistics i do actually always end up down those rabbit holes and those questions you wouldn't have asked otherwise yeah and i think i put like

the year in there like 2020 to 2022 or something so that's some good googling yeah these are updated stats um so 75 of the time women file for divorce holy shit um the main reasons people file for divorce are infidelity substance abuse and like fighting or arguing um the final straws that lead to a divorce are usually cheating and domestic violence like and or so they're not mutually exclusive um and divorce rates are decreasing though divorce rates for people 50 and up are increasing i have a thought about that can i share yes i feel as though it's because people are getting people are not getting married as quickly like as they used to which would make divorce rates go down then the older generations are realizing that they can get divorced because

women are more uh independent now i'm thinking of this in terms of like heterosexual relationships obviously um but like the women are like more independent than they used to be or they're feeling more empowered than they once did and so like obviously those older generations are feeling more well and also a lot of them are like okay now that the kids are through college let's get divorced yeah yeah so they've always wanted this but they stayed together for the kids until like college was over right i think i've said this on the podcast before my parents are both on their second marriage um and both of them have the same sentiment of like they didn't want to get married again if unless they knew 100 it wasn't gonna end in divorce because going through divorce

fucking sucks oh yeah so they're much more willing to like sit and chat about things well and another statistic i read is that i didn't write down is um if you are on your second marriage it's more likely to end in divorce really uh-huh because you've already done it i guess yeah i think because i think it's the idea of like divorce is so scary especially to our parents generations um like it's so taboo and scary and then after you actually go through it and you're done and you're alive you're like well i've done it once yeah and if it's like if you it's not gonna work out with someone it's just not gonna work out yeah yeah so i think just knowing you can leave maybe that's why maybe um so but it sounds like your parents were very intentional so that's

probably when they got married that was the other thing when they their first marriage they were very young that's another statistic um that i wrote down that people who get married in their 30s are less likely to divorce so that's pretty cool um and people file for divorce between january and march i'm wondering if it's like okay this is the last year we like got through the holidays yeah oh i hadn't considered that like that or like um let's give it a year or something and then like the new year starts and you're like i'm done yeah but also those are like those are sad girl hours that's like seasonal depression at its finest exactly that's what i was thinking i was like that's when i'm starting to lose my shit because i haven't seen the sun

in four months real we also never see the sun here yeah oh my god today was amazing we saw the sun today y'all yeah we saw the sun for a little bit fucking stupid fucking law this last weekend sucked ass yeah so much rain so much rain it's gonna start raining again dumping dumping rain not even i'm used to the seattle sprinkles uh-huh but occasionally it's just absolutely dumping and there's no way that you're really gonna know that no you're like oh it's raining tomorrow like it'll probably sprinkle here and there and then at some point we'll have some sun anyways um i have a few more stats oh uh the average marriage length is 8.2 years and that's the last statistic i wrote 8.2 years

i wonder if that's like because there are some marriages that are like 72 hours like kim k's first marriage well that was technically her second marriage to chris humphries i know too much about these people um and then there's like the the big end of the range that's like 30-year relationships and then it just averages out to being like 8.0 that would make sense you know what i mean because it's just like i wonder what the sample size looks like also there's several states that didn't participate so this is this is like countrywide but i think there are some laws around information like that so like that makes sense one of the states that isn't allowed to participate is california those are really interesting yeah so now you know some

divorce facts that's a really happy divorce fact of the week the force factor the more you divorce the more you divorce the more likely you are to divorce in the future damn wow i want to end on a thought okay and i want you can cut this out if you're editing and you decide you don't want to put it in but there was a passing conversation that liz and i had on on um texting i'm putting that oh okay i didn't know if you were like trying to have me move so i was like scooting away from you it's like we're just gonna have our legs touch i love this but there um an idea was brought to me and i texted liz about it and i want to float it by y'all um the jumbotron but i would want to call it the jumbotron that just came up with that literally

right now jump ho jump ho tron of like if you ever want to like send a little cute little message to somebody that listens to the podcast too we can read it we can read it um would you be interested they would we would charge money but it wouldn't be a lot um because we want to do this full-time ft um but anyway let us know you know because like i would love to like propose to someone for you no i'm just kidding do that yourself but like oh i'm like yes i may have no i mean i'd be into that but like i feel like they probably wouldn't you know what i mean it's like well you had the holy hour house proposed to me like never talk to me again um but then we'll marry you oh we would marry you yeah we'll uh we'll get ordained oh yeah oh i see what you

mean i was saying we'll actually marry we'll be a we'll be in a holy matrimony with them oh not like be the minister but like that i'm saying we should officiate that's yep that's what i meant can you imagine us officiating a wedding it would be hilarious the two of us up there we will be intoxicated oh hell yeah actually i don't maybe i'd be too nervous choir robe we'd come out looking like moira rose hell hell yeah oh just like the pope yeah all day all day pope with blonde wig i'll do it we'll do it hit us up jumbotron that will be a steep price we have to fly to you but we'll do it we we want to go on business trips and that sounds like we can write it off on our taxes mm-hmm so hit us up we'll uh we'll get ordained and then we will also

marry you if you ask nicely no one's asked me yet so well i'm just waiting we're here for the taking all right um well we love you our children yes that was actually like pretty good i kind of felt really good about that yeah