The Hoely Hour - E82 Getting Your Wiggles Out

Episode Date: April 15, 2022

When you want something between celibacy and a hoe phase, it's called "getting your wiggles out." Amelia shares some dating life updates, and a listener shares a sex story straight out of National Geographic. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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Initial plan term only. Greater than 50 gigabytes. May slow when network is busy. see terms i feel like i haven't seen you in so long i don't know i think you just last week when we recorded that does feel like a while ago why does that feel so long ago i don't know i just feel like so much has happened right a lot has happened a lot has happened a lot has happened with you and that's how i measured time welcome to the holy hour i'm amelia samson and i'm liz ball nice we're back to not fucking up yeah i was just thinking that too last week was a struggle i said my name is amelia samson instead of i'm amelia like who the i almost just said it again

don't know what's going on with me uh back with the housekeeping follow us on instagram tiktok twitter at the holy hour email us at holy hour podcast at gmail.com uh send us your spicy stories there uh subscribe on patreon for early access and ad free episodes and join our discord cute as fuck you're gonna be sick of me saying that but it's true follow me on all social media platforms at amelia samson and i am liz ball so hard on instagram and tiktok and liz t ball on twitter and then um we are still doing we're selling consent is my kink merch and donating 100 of the profits to rain um that's the whole month of april so go check it out and then to kick off may we'll be launching even more brand new merch i'm so fucking excited me too liz threw

the designs on some stuff last night and sent me pictures and i was like geeking the fuck out i'm losing my mind i'm i'm just designing shit that i want to wear to have a hot girl summer i'm exclusively going to be wearing our merch all summer y'all i got verified over the weekend on tiktok i thought you pull back on that one yeah i was like oh i hit the microphone and i'm screaming those are two bad things for recording i don't know if you guys know this but we have a podcast and it's not good if you hit the microphone with your hands we did not know that episode one go back and listen no don't don't i because i don't want people to listen and think of that because i'm thinking of that i think it's pretty obvious people that listen

people that listen and then listen they like listen the first episode and then skip forward they're like your quality got so much better it's like yeah we thank god we stopped using one mic and stopped hitting the table that the microphone was on we stopped recording in an echoey room and we learned what gain really does and you've always known because you studied this in school we also stopped blacking out so that did a lot for our quality too I think that definitely helped not blacking out every episode yeah I think about episode three a lot we were like sprawled out on your couch I don't remember a fucking thing we talked about that was like peak summer 2020 we're just like we were so chronically indoors but how we both were dealing with being chronically

indoors was so different like yeah you were really going through it you're having a hard time and i was just doing so many drugs yeah i was drunk like 100 of the time i was high on either mushrooms or weed so this episode beyond us just fucking around i keep grabbing amelia no i love it um uh we have a ton of amelia updates they have they keep ending and like they've taken like a backseat to like obviously our consent is my kink stuff and then um the week before that i think we already had like planned yeah so amelia has a shit ton of updates i remember she was telling me that when we weren't recording and i was shooketh there's a lot that's happened i know it's really just your dating life is just popping off it's really just been in the past two weeks a

lot of activity a lot of activity a lot of someone say paranormal activity some may say it's the amelia's fucking a ghost jesus amelia how many times can you hit a microphone in 30 seconds span okay we're back so me and squints are no more sad but also necessary you also had always anticipated that yeah it was uh the necessary nothing but respect for that man it was like a very like amicable mutual conversation of just like this got a little bit more serious and either of us wanted it to you are bad with time management him not me i'm great with time management but if i do say so myself except i'm late to everything but that's just because i get cocky about being on time i'm like i have so much time he gets busy with

something and then hyper focuses on that which is not conducive to a relationship and he recognized that and we called it quits um i would like to stay his friend not sure if that's possible we'll see um good dude but that's over and uh so there's a new a new cast of characters to introduce to the podcast a new cast i like that new cast members what was the name that we decided for this guy the poet the poet and that's for us to know why the poet he's a good one he's really afraid about me talking about him on the podcast he didn't say not to but he's always like i mean that's understandable but also as a reminder like in our earlier episodes we were very explicit but also we were trying to find our stride so we're just figuring it out yeah right and we've also

learned a lot i think and grown as like not really journalists because we're not doing any journal any hardcore journalism over here but we are providing a level of like curiosity and questioning and research and also joking around about sex so yeah we're not talking so much shit anymore but yeah so the poet he him and i um we i would like to throw in a disclaimer if you're like new to this it sounds like i'm jumping i'm homie hopping i'm like just jumping from dude to dude i'm just dating a bunch of people now it was just me and squints before like i was just dating squints exclusively so um now i'm now i'm not and i'm going back to my hoe phase is that the right i'm getting my wiggles out i'm getting your wiggles out i like that i don't feel like this

is a hoe phase i i feel like you already had your hoe phase i think so too i feel like now it's just a normal dating phase it's i'm dating my my best friend katie that i've talked about on here asked me what i am taking away from that relationship with squint good question yeah she's like what did you learn and i was like i'm realizing that i i am ready to start dating more intentionally like oh things that i don't because i when i started dating squints i was dating intentionally because like he's such a he's a good dude and i was like this is somebody i could like spend a lot of time with but there were things that were like very obviously not going to be long term both of us knew that but we still dated for like a year um I don't want to do that

anymore like I I really want to date people that I enjoy being around well and you two never really had like an exclusivity conversation no it was just kind of assumed yeah like kind of messy you kind of got there too like in your own time yeah and then it also like you met him or I know you knew him previously a little bit but your paths didn't cross until you were dating a bunch of people right right so it became intentional as you were moving along yeah it was fun to have just like one person and that was something that I learned I didn't think that I was going to be like a one-person gal until squints because it was like it's just nice to have like a companion you know that's something that I've always wanted and I think that I had to like be reminded of that

and so now I'm like trying to date people that I can see a future with not like maybe not marriage I won't know that but like somebody that I can see myself spending time like a lot of time with and not getting like bored of or like annoyed with or like seeing past things that like are like red flags to me just because like I want somebody you know I'm like done with that so me and the poet actually been on tiktok he followed me that's your new personal dating app yeah it's a good it's a good way i'm trying to there's been like five or six now from tiktok like not people that i've like had sex with it's been a fruitful um fruitful experience for me tiktok dating on tiktok has been um but so the poet lived in la and now he um lives in seattle

so we finally hung out and our first date was so much fucking fun it was just like so comfortable and easy and like he's just like he's so funny and he kept saying like I know you're not supposed to say this on a date but like I'm having a lot of fun we're like I really like you and I feel like that's not a cool thing to say on a date but like I really like you like he was just giving me a lot of affirmations that like squints knows this like a big pain point with squints was that he never said like he never complimented me on anything like he never told me that he liked me like if he complimented me on anything it was like in like a jokey tone so that's another thing that I'm taking away from that relationship is like I'm realizing what I didn't realize was important

to me until like this point in my life so it's been fun like dating the poet and it being so like kind of like carefree and easy and like i don't know it's just it feels very like effortless which is really fun i'm having a lot of fun with them the sex is good we had sex nice did i tell you that um you started to we and then yeah i think you started to save it oh for the for this we um yeah the first time we tried it was unsuccessful i think there was too much alcohol involved the second time wait you did tell me that first time you didn't tell me about the second time yeah we had we had sex on sunday nice was he over on saturday saturday okay yeah i haven't heard about this yet yeah yeah it was really good it was really good it was like he's just very we

just communicate really well you know i was gonna say like something that comes naturally to him was a pain point for someone else that you were dating yeah so i think that also just like that reflects something i've always believed which is just that everyone has different needs and your needs are going to be different than the person that squints ends up with exactly that's the thing is like you'll end up with someone who can meet your needs because we all have different needs and we all have different strengths i think that's something that's and the comedian was the same way like i would write letters of recommendation for like whoever they date in the future you know what i mean like they i have nothing bad to say about squints at all like he

just wasn't a good match for me what if we did give letters of recommendation to men like i'm sorry i'm not dating you unless you have a letter of recommendation from a previous re-referrals you need to ask the people you're dating for a letter of recommendation and you need to ask future landlords for a letter of recommendation for why you should be their tenant because you're the one giving them money damn they should they should give you a this is a good idea recommendation this feels like a better there's a new app coming out do you remember lulu there's a new app coming out that's like rate your ex and it's that's like that's what lulu so lulu from what i remember came out when we were in college i think it was my senior year

so you were probably a sophomore or junior um and you could like rate i think they had the guys had to have a facebook account or something because the app would like find them on facebook and you would rate the guys on like their i think their looks and like their dick which is all of this is fucked up yeah like if the sex was good and stuff like that yeah and then you could leave comments so you could write about whatever and then they took that part out they're like this is problematic so they took that part out and then they you were like you could only use like certain keywords yes remember like pros and cons like tag them yeah and overall the concept is fucked up super fucked you shouldn't be rating any person no and it's like that leaves so much

room for like people that are like you know upset that you broke up with them but like that's it to just like completely fuck over your chances for dating in the future and like it blows what about stalkers like yeah making fake profiles and things like that and that i don't know i used to look my ex up on that all the time when we were dating because i knew he was cheating on me he was and so i was always like looking his name up on lulu never found anything um you should have left a review i should have as another girl i should have cheated on his girlfriend with me and his dick wasn't even nice and then show it to him gotcha bitch this says your pp's bad so uh but yeah now this rate rate your ex thing is coming out i don't i know nothing about it it's

like in beta right now but um that's not a good it sounds like a really bad idea i feel like we're going back in time i know half the time totally i'm just like there's too many people with too many bad ideas and access to the internet we are living in an uh an alternate reality now as of 2020 so it's like community this is just the worst timeline in some ways yeah personally great timeline uh terms of societally awful politically awful it's just terrible we did start the podcast during this new timeline though that's pretty dope that's fair we did do that we did um so yeah the poet's a new name you're going to be hearing i love this for us i'm really excited i'm a big fan i'm a big fan the good thing about us talking about this now is i have a new

rule y'all and i should probably fucking tell you that i have a new rule for myself where i will not bring up a guy until i go on three dates with him so does this mark you've been on three days we've been on four now oh wow okay yeah saturday was our fourth um you're going on a date tomorrow i am with who i'm breaking my rule now oh sorry no it's okay no we can yeah but that's okay this is you never know this is somebody that's probably he doesn't get a nickname no he's he is just roommates he's roommates with um two of my best friends from growing up and i happen to match with him on hinge um i'm sure i'll have a lot of really fun nicknames for him because if he sticks around if we go on three dates he'll have a cool nickname because he does a lot of really cool shit

okay um let's hope he makes it he's i like that i like that there's a three-day threshold okay so you want to give an update about mr liz oh yeah well because there's not a lot to talk about and certain things i like to keep just between us because it's not just my relationship it's our relationship and like i he doesn't listen to the podcast anymore so i don't think he would necessarily care what we're talking about but i had texted him so i haven't been able to have sex obviously because of the surgery i had and i see my doctor tomorrow morning to get that all clear to use like tampons and stuff and have sex so yeah stoked for that finally stopped bleeding um today thank god for that good mazel anyways uh as you could imagine not being able to have sex

is has made me very horny yeah i believe it but i so i keep having sex dreams about mr liz and but they're more about like pleasing him so i told him that and then i was like i would like to be able to like make a move but we i because i had mentioned this to you too but like we plan when we have sex and that works for both of us it just is it's easier for both of us to do it like that um rather than like not have this kind of like clear communication or idea of when we're gonna to have sex or if because no one wants to get turned down especially me i'm sensitive and delicate this is always uncomfy yeah and just in my experience i am not used to being the person who's not in control of like a sexual dynamic i wouldn't say he is either in i've just never been

in a situation like this where like you know i'm on ssri is just kind of having to mitigate when we don't want to yeah it's easier to just plan it because then you're in that headspace right to work around yeah maybe it's a little less exciting than spontaneous like the spontaneity of like oh we were just in the mood and blah blah blah yeah um i think it's inevitable though i mean like for relationships to like take on a different like the sex lives in relationships to take on a new life a new lease on life yeah and honestly i think in any relationship the biggest thing that you're gonna have to come to terms with is like you are going to change you're gonna change as people and you're gonna change as a couple so anyways so true uh grow together

while i was texting him i was like i just kind of feel like i i want to be able to make a move but i don't know if you'd even want me to and like i just don't feel confident doing that and i don't know that i just wanted to share that thought with him and then he was like i thought he was gonna be like i'm sorry or just tell me some excuse or whatever because that's the kind of thing i'm used to hearing from men and never from him yeah so it's always it's surprising every time every time he is amazing i'm like holy shit what this is wild um he'll always respond with like an unexpected answer and he's like well i was thinking it'd be really fun if we had like a sexy weekend away and um you could just initiate

whatever you want whenever you want and i was like oh it was like a cartoon like oh my god my eyes fell out of my head my tongue rolled across the floor but i just was like that's so innovative and like also like thoughtful yeah it's just fun it's like i love that we were able to talk about this and he like came back with just like a really great solution hell yeah because it's a way to feel empowered but not have to because i'm a bottom i don't want this responsibility all of the time so i was supposed to say it's very switchy it is i like that which is not very common for us no like i'm interested to hear how it goes though like if you like like being a top a little bit i kind of love that or like a power bottom power bottom that's a better way to put it

i'd rather be power bottom than like a switch i think heard i don't know just the more the more bottomy i get to be the more i just would rather be there yeah i feel that i feel that nice i love the idea of a power bottom it's like it's a happy medium maybe that's kind of what a switch is i don't know maybe tune in yeah tune in to find out if you don't when you're doing that yet oh no i'm hoping it'll probably be somewhat soon i thought that would just be a fun little like update about my actual relationship because yeah i don't talk about it as much i just i really love that you and mr liz like how you guys talk and communicate with each other is like undoing or working at undoing like all these years of people making you afraid to bring things to them because like

every time you bring anything to him every single time at least that i've heard of no like i feel so much better it's literally been every time every single time so i that actually reminds me i either read or heard something recently that was like the perfect relationship isn't being with someone who doesn't trigger you at all it's being with someone who you can be triggered by or around and it's safe so yes i think this is a perfect example is like a lot of things trigger me and it's not things that are specific to him or what he's doing or how he treats me it's just like an experience reminds me of a past experience like a lot of situations will trigger me especially at the beginning of our relationship and just talking to him about it is so easy and then i mean i still

get nervous but of course he's not gonna be like an overnight thing he literally surprises me every time with how he responds you are chipping away at like all of the years of like dating like shitty dudes really because like i don't know there's nobody is just like i mean maybe some people are but like more often than not people are afraid of confrontation because somebody made them that way yeah so like i don't know practice it's it's a it's a practice thing like practice makes perfect on communication and like every time you guys work through something difficult it just makes it easier to bring something up the next time you know that's dope it's been cool to watch you like not have to like get pepped up to like or like hyped up to have a conversation

you'll just be like this is bugging me and then you're like oh we talked i'm good now i'm like that was like 10 seconds between texts you don't need me at all anymore i've been watching the show doll face i haven't seen it it's on hulu i highly recommend it but i like that it they're women who have great friendships with each other and they also like represent just kind of this anxiety spirals that we put ourselves in and they temper each other with logic and patience and like and then they're just they're like i'm sorry that i made you feel like this it's because of xyz and let's just like talk about it and be friends i love that yeah i'm like yes i love seeing like this kind of representation of friendship yes that's how i

feel like my friendships are totally yeah especially like female friendships because i feel like more often than not like in media and also just like how people talk about female friendships is like they're so catty like everyone's talking shit about each other like men just like punch it out and then they're fine and like women have to like be passive-aggressive i know it's like anyway um we could save that for another episode yeah i have a lot of things to say about that we have some listener emails we want to read one of them will be more of a discussion and the other is like gonna be our sex fact of the week because it's really cool and exciting it's exciting and it's cool and we're stoked to share it so i'm not gonna read the subject line

of this one because it'll give away the story and also this is our first time reading it just had such an interesting subject line hey amelia and liz i just wanted to say how much i love the pod and both of you ladies i love listening and feel like i'm right there with you both it's opened up conversations with my own friends too recently i was talking to one of my girlfriends about dumb and awkward sex stories we have and i remembered this doozy fresh off a breakup i was going through a bit of a phase where i didn't really know what i wanted out of dating while i probably just needed some casual fun good old catholic guilt played into being wary of casual hookups i was on the usual apps for a time but had little experience with hookups or anything

of the sort i saw one guy pop up and thought he was cute i did some digging he was a cop and had a cat and was into some of the same same nerdy stuff i was into i figured it'd be worth a shot and liked him he matched back and i made some dumb cop joke to start off the conversation we hit it off and decided to meet up at starbucks and probably make our way to his place to hook up as long as i felt comfortable our text combos got pretty detailed and raunchy fairly quickly over a few days he mentioned being into rough sex which i was totally fine with and he especially mentioned that he could get very animalistic and vocal to which i thought sure sounds fun and exciting oh god coffee went fine and we ended up going to his place he initially showed off all his police gear

including his gun which now i feel really weird about but glazed over at the time good lord oh man i was honestly super nervous and freaking out because i'd never really had just a hookup before i didn't really know what to do once we were on the couch but i went in for a kiss and we started making out right away so he starts going down on me and he's getting very into it which is totally working for me and i was really starting to get somewhere suddenly though things got weird he starts rubbing his entire face all over my lady bits acting like it's a goddamn pie eating contest no full-on bulldog eating a roast beef sandwich oh no she's really painting a picture for us he's getting more and more vocal especially when i put my hand in his hair and

try to pull back to guide him a little better god bless your heart i've been there yeah like no the clip is just this way buddy a millimeter to the left i assume he thought he was doing the right thing and was trying to show his animalistic side to me and then it started the pie eating contest turned into grunting and then he puts his lips right over the entrance of my vagina and straight up growls while shaking his head side to side over my lips i had no idea what the fuck was going on he did it two or three more times and then pulls up to look at me he goes wow it's taking a long time for you to come i guess i'm into it though so i'm going to keep going in some weird low-pitched growl voice imagining like i'm the devil

i'm batman wow it's taking a long time for you to come i'm going to keep going i didn't even know what to do he went back down below and kept randomly growling and smushing his whole face into my crotch i don't know what happened how it happened but i did eventually finish maybe 15 minutes later that isn't a scenario i'd fake an orgasm yeah we ended up then having god-awful frenzied doggy style rough sex because i felt guilty i came but he didn't he seemed thrilled with the encounter and said we should do it again i basically squeaked a yeah sure and then got the heck out he ended up completely ghosting me the next day anyway

and i felt super gross about the whole encounter luckily i got over the guilt pretty quickly and now it's just a very awkward sex encounter i can joke about he sent a few hey stranger texts after a few months went by which i promptly ignored again thank you so much for this pod and the community you've grown i can't wait to see where this all takes you oh my god what the fuck yeah this was amazing this fully delivered oh i i'm just imagining like hooking up with someone and then they start basically doing like ape grunts i i just want to know when when he has gotten the permission to do this in the past like when he's gotten like the the um you know there have been times where i have been hooking up with men and i've been mad at whoever introduced

them to their kink because now i'm like dealing with the consequences and i didn't know how to say no because i was 21 that's so fucking true and also the ghosting the next day maybe he was used to women ghosting him so he was like i'm going after he grunts into their vagina can't ghost me if i ghost you yeah well i mean she did get off so i know for her see i was just saying i was like i would have faked an orgasm but like good for you for like getting yours because you had to get something out of this situation and i'm glad you got an orgasm at some yeah it's like at what point are you like i'm gonna cut my losses here you know i just i'm so i feel like the first time i hook up with someone i'm perfectly content with not orgasming i'm like me too we'll suss it

out we'll see if you deserve it me too but then like there's something about like being around a dude that like i can't fucking stand where i'm like i better fucking come you know which is why i'm sick like i also think you can come easier than i can yeah i i do a lot of the time i have an easy time but like with like um fake dom i was like you're going to make me come and when i told him that he didn't make me come like i am so dry because of you i just had to listen to 30 minutes of your stand-up routine about that recently god that guy was the fucking worst um but yeah uh i was like i didn't come and he was like oh sorry sorry uh-uh so i mean the fact that like the um the growling cop was like well it's taking you a long time guess i'm gonna have to keep going

that gets you a couple of points i'm afraid you're still in the negatives i'm afraid of what this man does yeah in general yeah like i am not surprised in the least that this person's career is a police officer wow i just it does take a certain personality the fact that he was like look at all my cop gear and my gun like that is so fucking strange i would get the fuck out of there you really you got you got a ticket into heaven for putting through putting yourself through this whole scenario and with grace at the end of the day maybe he's a nice guy maybe he's a nice guy well like what none of this sounds particularly great like no like the you know first date he's just gonna be like there's my god he's just like motorboated her her vagina like a bulldog with a

roast beef sandwich is that what she said yeah lord i love that descriptor because it's a little upsetting but also really funny there have been just like a bulldog just like i wish i had this part on video i know me too i'm so fucking sad y'all you guys aren't getting a video this week because my camera died and my phone's full and that's just too much technology to figure out right now and also this is going to be a fucking nightmare episode for you to edit so the video would be a fucking nightmare to edit anyway so sorry i wish y'all could see what we were doing right now we're getting so into this story um i love that he's like wow it's taking you a long time to come i guess after just like blinding you with this just like

yelling abnormal behavior like like yowling into your pussy can you imagine that why why isn't this working just like just like is this thing on like yelling yelling into it like um when you have like a paper towel roll yeah hello down there why haven't you come yet and what's even animalistic about i don't know any animal that does this to each other yeah no no no animal does that that we're aware of at least no i'm trying to think no just yelling into each other's vaginas i can get pretty animalistic like what animal that's not animalistic it's just like uh what's the right word scary

it's just like um archaic i would say like it's a it's a clear vagina i'm i'm pounding my chest it's it's a clear lack of um sex education yeah what is what is yelling you know what if that's your kink that's totally fine but you need like more of introduction than just like i like rough sex and it's animalistic and those are two those are not descriptive enough for like what you're actually into because you got to make sure that people are on board with that because this girl just walked away with kind of like an embarrassing yeah and you know if it were a different person potentially traumatizing story it's also not going to make you come no i want to know where he learned that i haven't seen a porn oh yeah yelling into a vagina

is not going to make you cum. I think we're ready for our sex fact of the week. Yeah, our sex fact of the week email that we got from someone that's written in in the past that gave himself the name Sad Boy. He has a fun little update for us. Hi, Amelia and Liz. This is Sad Boy again. There has been a major development with my wife and I, and I thought I'd say something for all the listeners. When last we left it, my wife and I had never had sex where I reached an orgasm. we have been working on that in a slow and steady process but there is another complication that i didn't disclose before my wife has vaginismus which means that her muscles do not relax during sex and it is incredibly painful we've never had any form of deep penetrative sex but i don't

attribute any of that to my own issue however a development has taken place my wife and i have just discovered that she is pregnant this is your sex fact of the week which is that male orgasm is not necessary for a potential pregnancy pre-cum the lubrication that comes from a penis while aroused has sperm in it and that can still do the job so i suppose we can say that this is a reason to wear a condom at all times if you're worried about pregnancy but also how incredible fertility and the female body can be thanks for everything we both love you so much and now you can be grandmothers since we are your children thanks dad boy formerly sad boy so cute i love this actually i have things to say about this first of all congratulations that's so fucking exciting

so to speak fucking exciting ayo um dad got dad's call back wow that was good it's been a while um i when i was younger i was always afraid of getting pregnant from pre-cum from just we've all heard the stories oh from dry yeah it was the dry hump pregnancy it's a lot different it's a lot different we did name a episode that but i did learn that they're a dry hunt pregnancy yes but i did learn that there is there is there's sperm in pre-cum a lot there there's less of a chance if you pee before sex oh interesting because um that clears the passageway clears out the clears out the hallway yeah um the hallway and then uh if you have like recently came if you are having sex you can there's a lot of there could be a lot of sperm in

the pre-cum if you've recently had sex so that fueled a lot of my anxiety around getting pregnant through my genes when i was dating a mormon you had a lot of men lie to you about everything girls especially how you get pregnant sperm burger that's also a callback well wow this is a cute little full circle episode um i was gonna say that i appreciate that these listeners know that i wanted to skip the part where i'm a mom and i'm just a grandma i don't know if i vocalized that on the podcast but please we're grandmas we're grandmas we did it what what grandma name do you want to go by grammy i'm gonna be should i be nana yeah grammy and nana that's us we love you our grandchildren

should we sing grandchildren this one yeah hell yeah all right ready okay well thanks for listening we love you our grandchildren nice i feel good about the notes we hit