The Hoely Hour - Gooning With Ur Boys

Episode Date: November 7, 2025

Article's from today's episode: The Goon Squad by Daniel Kolitz for Harper's Magazine. https://harpers.org/archive/2025/11/the-goon-squad-daniel-kolitz-porn-masturbation-loneliness/ Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

yeah i do think the female orgasm could solve a lot of world peace though i agree like just if you experience one you'll see that that there is beauty in the world hey everyone uh liz is still checking levels here so uh don't forget to tip your waitress try the veal um i'm here till tuesday don't do the veal don't do the veal they're baby cows yeah i was like you're you don't eat red meat well frank's bio is try the veal oh on instagram and apparently that's something that like people say on microphones at restaurants i didn't know that at all wow yeah i just learned something well that's why i'm here um you do be teaching me i do be you also be teaching me i feel like i probably learn more from you than you learn from

me i don't think that that's true at all you're very well educated on so many topics the nicest thing that anyone's ever said to me you remember everything thank you i have a terrible memory you don't you know so much about so many things that's it has to be within recent i i know a lot about things that are very interesting to me same i don't remember shit that's not interesting to me well amelia also reminded me something i forgot that i did before we were recording um apparently i bet one of her friends 40 dollars that his relationship would end and it did and i do not remember this at all he came up to me he was like hey so you gotta tell liz that i owe her 40 bucks because she was right about my relationship not lasting

i was like what she said that apparently i did so fucking funny oh also maybe it was a version of that maybe it was a nicer version probably not probably not i think you know there was um the state that you were in that night you were you were feeling very honest when i threw up in the bushes in front of my house it was on my birthday yeah so as god intended not that that's an excuse i probably would have said it sober yeah just not not not to him yeah um it would have made everyone else bet on it yeah i can't wait to tell mr liz that when he gets home so fucking funny um mr liz also said something pretty funny this weekend that i ended up texting amelia so I feel one kind of stupid for not realizing this but when I was in therapy I was telling

my therapist how like I was and I was just like blabbering at this point it was pretty early on where before I start like getting into anything important I'm so happy to hear that you do that too well because I'm like I don't know sometimes I don't come prepared yeah right and then something unlocks it's also hard to be like okay here's what I have to talk about today like how do you i can't naturally transition there's just like not a lot happening in my life and that's good yeah that's why it's like i'm going inside that's so true going internal um anyway but i was explaining how or i yeah i had been talking to mr liz over the weekend and i was like just kind of rambling and then um he like started kind of like rambling back which he doesn't always

do he's more of just like has something to say yeah in between like occasionally and i i was like oh that was so exhilarating and he was like what do you mean and i was like i wish you would talk to me the way i talk to you where i just like explain my whole thought process about a topic and he was like uh what did he say well you were like that's why i like talking to amelia because well he called it something yeah i'm trying to remember what it was so the story that you told me if i may yeah you were like this is why i love talking to amelia because she just like also speaks in stream of consciousness that's what he called it he's like just a stream of consciousness and then i was like yes and then when i was explaining that to my therapist she was like

well you know that's like an adhd thing right and i was like i didn't know that either huh and she was like yeah and then she's like i wonder if you've processed like everything that's happened in your life before you got a diagnosis well i was like actually i have not really thought about that so then i was relaying this to mr liz after and um he i was like that's why i just love talking to amelia so much because she's just like does the same exact thing and i like learn from her it's like emotionally and mentally stimulating for me like it's so fun to talk to her that's exactly how i feel talking to you too and then he was like yeah you and amelia are an adhd super collider but i was like that is perfect that might be what we renamed the podcast adhd super collider

yeah i would actually that would be funny that should be that should be our band name yeah i think that would be a good band name what instrument would you play in our band um i think it'd be vocals oh i didn't know that was on the table maybe this is just but i would want it to be like hyper pop vocals you know what i mean i think maybe this podcast is a band but it's just spoken word spoken word band yeah we're musicians at the end of the day i like that um i was gonna say flute because that's what i played in high school but i don't remember any of the notes besides b flat because that's what we would start in oh b flat and i was actually pretty good at the flute fuck yeah i i didn't play it in high school i played

it in middle school that's what it was oh yeah well i remember being good in middle school good enough and i always had a zit on my chin we all did the flute's it yeah oh my god hashtag flutes it dude it's so fucking gross like tell us if you got one if if you played the clarinet you knew how fucking disgusting it was underneath the reed yeah oh my god the reed and then you have braces oh you have to get make your weed oh yucky uh anyway we're talking about nine things right now yeah as we as we get into the first topic well i uh i didn't really sleep last night y'all because of what we've decided our first topic is which is uh i so i was on antibiotics and steroids both of which can give you a yeast infection oh yeah individual each

other for that yeah and i was on both so and i've been like feeling like a little bit of like a fire down under but it hasn't been like anything intense you know but i'm just like i feel like maybe i'm getting a yeast infection so let me get on top of it the yeast itch yeah the one that doesn't go away no matter how much you scratch and so i got monistat seven because i did monistat one once and it burned my vagina out of my body wait i didn't know that you've done monistat one girl and i don't okay i don't know if we've exchanged these stories before and you know sorry if you're a listener of five years i'm sure you've forgotten too if we have talked about monistat one and yeast infections but i did monistat one that should be illegal it i don't

know how it is yeah every review online is like about how horrible this product is so like if you don't know monistat one is supposed to treat a yeast infection in one day and then there's a few others i think there's five and seven there's three and seven okay three and seven um and with i don't it was when i was working retail and i only i didn't have two days off in a row so i was like i gotta get this shit done and over with so i got the monostat one day um did it overnight i wake up and my vagina is so swollen oh no it looked like a balloon oh i was like no waddling i was like oh my god what the fuck is happening and i go to the bathroom and i like look and i like i think i also had to get a mirror because i was like what the fuck am i looking at

and it I was just like holy shit I had a terrible allergic reaction and like it regardless of if you have an allergic reaction it burns oh yeah so then I have to scramble to get my opening retail shift covered so I can go to urgent care so I'm like begging my co-worker she's so nice I was like I'm so sorry I really need to go to urgent care can we just swap shifts and so lucky that she was awake yeah I able to do that I think well because I woke up super early because I was so uncomfortable right and then I go to urgent care and I'm just like fuck this sucks and I hate when like I don't know I don't want a man doctor to see my vagina oh yeah I had a man doctor look at my butthole once I don't I don't know I don't if I don't have a choice I don't

have a choice but then he's like asking me like if i he think if i think i have an std and i was like no i know that i don't and i was like this is definitely a yeast infection like i've had a yeast infection yeah it's a pretty common like you know what it feels like when you've had it's like i'm having an allergic reaction to this medication and then he was like well maybe and then i was like no there's a common denominator here are like very similar to my experience see men just don't they they aren't able to recognize what's going on in their own bodies so they assume that nobody else can true oh my god go off clean thank you um yeah no my when i did one day i was just like writhing in pain when was this this was years ago this was like

maybe five years ago i did the one day and i was like what this surely can't be normal like this can't be an experience everyone has burning yeah it was burning it was itching i was like it was like my body was contorting without me meaning to because it was so painful and then i looked online and everyone's like this should be fucking illegal this is fucking crazy so that degree burns on my pussy yeah episode title yeah um uh but then so i did the seven day because i was like first of all this isn't like so bad that i'm like i need to get rid of this right now yeah i've done seven days and it hasn't been that bad oh my god but i was also in like middle no high school you know what i think the issue is though is that when i did it last night i didn't lay down

right away which you're supposed to do to like stop at the leakage i like did it and then i realized that i needed to put a diaper on polly which is like a 20 minute experience because like dog diapers are just fucking awful um so i was like upright for a while like i was sitting down so i think that because once i stood up after doing that was when it really started bothering me and then i had to like you know i i pushed through for like an hour and then i was like i need to get in the shower so i did but i woke up this morning and i was still burning seven day it's like it's a low it makes me wonder if like they've changed something about it since i've last used it it i don't i was so upset there but all of this to say if you guys have a yeast infection or even

bb like because both of those things you can just get like yeah it's not that there's anything necessarily like going on down there maybe it could be like your diet or in amelia's case she was taking medication um anything that could fuck with your gut biome yeah has the potential to give you a yeast infection which is crazy but anyways you can just go to like urgent care zoom care and get diflucan which is uh it's a teeny tiny pill and it gets rid of all the is it just one pill yeah that's fucking crazy yeah single pill what the fuck they should why they should really make it over the counter it it needs to be it needs to be but of course it's crazy it's a female problem it's a vagina problem and so i mean you can also like i've given i gave a yeast infection

to my ex before i knew that you could do that i guess i didn't know you could do that either yeah it is transmittable um but the uh i don't that feels incorrect i think we should is it fully transmittable look at it not every time i'll look at that check we need we need a producer on set to do fact checking can you imagine that would be so funny we would never be able to get a word like look it up because we don't know well listen you know if donald trump can lie on 60 minutes with no fact checking all right okay yes a woman can pass yeast infection to a male partner through sexual contact including vaginal oral or anal sex while the risk is not 100 and many cases are mild it is possible for the yeast to transmit and cause an infection in a man it's called balanitis

fascinating which sounds like um balanitis what does that sound i mean itis makes it sound like a disease but is there like a an island that sounds like that balanitis it does kind of sound like the bowel no i don't know when i'm listening back to this i'm going to be like you fucking idiot it's so and so um well i didn't know that a yeast infection was a fungus it is so that makes a lot of sense it is indeed which brings me to my next most fun fact which has nothing to do with sex but has everything to do with fungus i have been dealing with acne on my face on my chin specifically these little itty bitty dots on my chin and my forehead that don't ever come to a head but they're there and you pop them and they come back the next day looking exactly the same

and every single dermatologist that i've taught i almost said dermatitis i have itis stuck in my head now every single dermatologist that i've talked to about this is like no no and they like put me on tretinoin or like say that i should get on accutane and i'm like i'm not taking i'm not taking accutane and also like should be able to just figure this out this can't be like a unique problem and so i was on reddit and somebody posted a picture of their chin and i was like that looks literally exactly like mine so i went to the comments and the top comment was like uh dandruff shampoo and like all of the comments underneath it were like oh my god yes like this that cleared mine up in two days because if it turns out not every case obviously but

it's fungal acne i also didn't know that dandruff was fungus yeah i thought it was dry scalp there are three different kinds of chemical that they put in dandruff shampoo it's bringing a tear to your eye she almost sneezed um it's ketoconazole there's like some sort of sulfate and then like another thing but um all of them can help with fungal acne if you have what sounds like what i have look up pictures of fungal acne and look up the symptoms my look up like a normal picture picture of fungal acne yeah and a lot of the a lot of the um google images are like fungal acne versus like um blamed acne and it's like it's super helpful to see the difference because like also i don't know if this is a common

occurrence with fungal acne this is the grossest fucking thing this is so gross but what really tipped me off on mine was that um the when i would pop them like it's like it smelled oh interesting yeah like bad um and it's because of the bacteria that's caught in there so anyway um mine's basically cleared up now i just have like scarring after using it for two days i mean you're i was gonna say your skin looks beautiful thank you so much i used it on my forehead because i was having like a lot of forehead acne i'm pretty sure that was fungal well doesn't it spread it does but as we've just learned ever about yeast infections balanitis well it makes sense that your your gut biome's just fucked up right now

so not only are you having a yeast infection you're having skin problems yeah i just pointed to emilia's crotch well i thought you were going to tell us talk about how i don't shit ever which is also true everything is just kind of fucked up in my gut you should take some probiotics well i've been shitting every day for the past week i don't want to brag is it because you've been taking probiotics no it's i don't know what it's because of but i'll take it i'll take it regardless I recommend the probiotic might be the ozempic which is supposed to slow down how has it been by the way um it's been fine I'm down to like I was doing two small injections a week but then I am now doing like a normal microdose once a week so I'm doing 14 units

now where I was breaking it up between six and six before when I was just doing 12 I was just like what would happen if i just did all 14 at once and it's been fine so and it's a lot easier to remember so here i am i've lost 10 pounds not that that's been the goal in fact i didn't want that to be something that i paid attention to at all but i have lost 10 pounds healthy mindset to have yeah um and the pressure in my legs is like a little eased so yeah it's going well thank you for asking no i was i hadn't heard an update so i was curious it's a b-name you need um so i have something for you uh it's not an actual gift it's um what we had lightly touched on last week about the about gooners fuck yeah in the goon squad i did start reading that article by the way oh okay

good yeah i didn't read the whole thing um well i'm gonna give you a little recap of it so uh and we can pause and discuss as you would if you would like okay um but this was an article for harper's magazine but you can read it online it's called the goon squad it's by daniel kolitz the article begins with the viral story and suicide of nautica malone a man who committed public sex a public sex act at a bikini coffee stand that happened in washington the story from this yeah um his subsequent vigil dubbed gunerol was co-opted by an online subculture that's like not funny but it's so funny um and then here's i'll also be reading a few quotes from the article but it said days earlier malone had pulled up to the drive-thru window nude from the waist down

hand on his penis the view count was still climbing when malone drove a few towns over and shot himself in the head that was so tragic because like you like that might have been what pushed him over the edge but there had to have been so much shit that led up to him like jacking off in a barista like at a bikini at a bikini barista stand well and he probably i wouldn't be surprised if he had done something weird already oh yeah and um but like this like online group referred to as gooners like kind of co-opted this man's story um but there was no evidence that this i think it was like 40s there's no evidence that this 40 something man was a right um i don't know um gooning is defined as a new communal and goal-oriented form of

masturbation akin to edging with the aim of reaching a trans-like goon state this is so like topically relevant for no not november i'm gonna be saying goon and gooning and goons a lot so honestly i'm i'm really upset that gooner roll is so funny it is very funny like it's not it's not but that's that's so clever i fucking hate that okay continue the gooner goons to reach goon state so the gooner goons which means jerking your penis to reach goon state a supposed zone of total ego death or bliss that some liken to advanced meditation the attainment of which compels them to masturbate for hours or even days at a time oh my it doesn't even sound fun that's like taking the most fun thing out of out of the out of the event that's like kama sutra for

masturbating guna sutra guna sutra thank you i could do it too see the subculture first gained attention through goon caves rooms dedicated to porn consumption which users proudly shared online is this a little gay yeah it is a little gay and we'll get more into that okay cool um they posted photos of their goon caves to reddit and these photos were astonishing one of course noticed the screens sometimes three or four of them sometimes upward of a dozen each lit up with porn the rise of gooning is linked to the evolution of porn from hidden magazines to the ubiquitous free and extreme content available on tube sites and social media the very air suddenly was misted with pornography

um the author finds community central hub on discord where he observes communal masturbation in stream rooms picture this you work for a masturbation factory in hell you log on to your scheduled workplace zoom call what what do you see you see what i saw in the goon verse oh my god a key source goon cultist that's like their name um provides a prehistory of the practice tracing into games on 4chan and early streaming platforms um and then a quote says like maga it is a big tent movement in which many eccentric tendencies have converged the author creates a gooning questionnaire and receives extensive data from about 100 respondents revealing that the extreme goon state is rarely attained with the average session lasting two to three hours like why like

okay i'll let you keep going in other words the goon state so central to the subculture's branding and self-conception is only rarely attained descriptions of the goon state from respondents emphasize a loss of self and intense blissful sensations i feel like just do drugs i'm sorry this just sounds like how like a female orgasm feels that is so accurate like they think that they invented something like if a man were able to experience the intensity of a female orgasm they probably wouldn't be so mean start wars addicted oh addicted to jorking off yeah i do think the female orgasm could solve a lot of world peace though i agree like just if you experience one you'll see that that there is beauty in the world yeah like the birds sing

every time after i yeah they come flying in and help me like get ready for the day like in cinderella little hummingbirds doing my hair yeah it's beautiful yeah um uh someone described it as it's like i'm i'm in anti-gravity or covered in liquid tingles all over me brain fuzzy skin tickling all over the community is bound by rituals like feeding which is sending curated porn to sustain a session and wank battling which is competitive porn sharing competitive competitive porn sharing they've made this into like a whole like how is it competitive to see who can share the most um i competitive porn sharing i think is like like it's your job to like curate porn for a user for their session for another user

so you're like finding porn and making like porn compilations let's just keep going let's just keep going and then we'll circle back so upset there's just so many details to this that i think most people don't like aren't aware of like i wish i wasn't i thought it was just uh like i thought it was just like being addicted to porn but these people identify as porn sexual i mean i'm fucking joking like i just feel i know you're gonna keep going i just i feel like people are so desperate to be interesting also Pornhub makes porn compilations for you I think this is so this is so much more meticulous than that Amelia it's crazy like after this definitely read the full article but they will make like so instead of listening to a compilation of like an artist

like album it's like a whole specific vibe of like clips of porn and I don't know what that entails but i'm like thinking of like me making a music playlist see you know yeah but i would just i feel like when i'm watching porn like if i'm about to have an orgasm and it switches to a different scene i would be it's like somebody like when you're like about to come and they switch up what they're doing you know and it like you lose the orgasm but so compare this to compare this feeling to like scrolling on tiktok yeah like it's the same thing that's crazy to me it's just different that it's like sex it has a sexual component yeah and i guess you're not trying to come right away so i mean that's the whole point is you're kind of edging yourself

what a fucking i mean i i i don't like to judge but i do think some things should something should be judged yeah um okay let's keep going okay um by far by first popular of these rituals is feeding a sort of porn meditated cyber sex in which one gooner sustains another gooner session by sending them curated porn okay so like i guess also like you had a collection that you really liked that's you sharing like your favorites for like so fucking funny it's gay really like making a playlist for someone like a music playlist yeah that's so fucking funny i think it's gay as hell for some these virtual porn meditated interactions create a complex such sexual valence sparking a limited primarily virtual strain of bi curiosity among those

who identify as straight um and i'm gonna read you like a screenshot of a discord conversation between two users oh my god so one user is fuji final season is approaching been gooning the past months do you want to get back to stroking together i miss you so much and then beta loser i don't know these are made-up screen names beta loser response 100 me too baby i'm really sorry for quitting last time heartbreak and then fuji said heart heart why are you apologizing you did what you had to do all good yeah habibi oh all good yeah habibi is that what he's saying i don't know but i mean i don't know what you'd be correct i just don't know what any of them are saying at all but this is that is you know if it's helping these men explore their sexuality

then that's a positive it's just like such a complicated path to like yeah being gay or bisexual yeah or whatever um this quote says squint very hard and you can almost seeing goon world the realization of the 90s dream of the internet as intercorporal judgment free gender fluid sexual playground that's true yeah yeah it has kind of lost that it's lost it's je ne sais quoi yeah it's just been like poisoned by like advertisers and ai yeah and that's only going to continue anyways bring back gooners hashtag bring back gooners um many respond many respondents cite a deep loneliness and a craving for the sense of community that these online spaces provide and then one quote but i suspect what these gooners really might be after

is the sense of community that these spaces offer this being something this being something the modern world has become increasingly deprived of a significant number of gooners identify as pornosexuals a type of volsal which is voluntarily celibate um whose sexual needs are entirely met by pornography which they sometimes personify you know i wonder if that's like a like a sect of asexuality like if you don't need to be you don't want to have sex you just would rather watch it yeah like i feel like that's that's i mean everything's on a spectrum yeah so i wonder if that kind of fits maybe we're being too judgmental you know that i think that there are some positives in this for sure but it's fucking

weird it is weird like it's weird and complicated for like kind of no reason the existence of it is really fucking strange and it can also be true that it's helping some people find themselves yeah yeah um unlike unlike a vole cell the pornosexual does so because their sexual needs are entirely met by pornography which not a few of them conceive as a kind of entity or goddess fascinating okay a pornosexual named what is it spishak spishak a pornosexual named spishak explains his fear of real world into intimacy citing the exhausting ambiguity of not knowing what a partner is truly thinking yeah like totally I can relate to that but at some point like you can't just like always be worried what someone's thinking yeah I mean I think too like this

sometimes I want privacy in my in my own head yeah you don't need to know my thoughts yeah yeah there could also be an autism component to like yes for some people here too but like I mean like thinking of porn as like a goddess you know what I mean yeah like it just it it this i mean that's how people treat ai it feels like everything that you're sharing here is just one step past acceptable you know what i mean like like the general vibe of all of this is like okay like i'm glad that they have a community but then also it's it crosses that line into being really fucking weird like immediately yeah you know what i mean well and as i'm reading this the quote says what if she's bored by spishak's doing but too polite to

tell him worse what if she's uncomfortable with the entire situation how could sip at sip shack possibly know but like as i'm kind of thinking of this i think he's more worried about himself feeling uncomfortable and not knowing how to vocalize that oh yeah like oh well she won't know what i'm thinking like what if she's too afraid to say she doesn't like this or want it like yeah but also like she could just tell you why would that make like it's okay for you to say no to things that make you uncomfortable too yeah i don't know yeah yeah um the preferred for the preferred porn format for many is pmv porn music video a hyper edited over stimulating montage of clips synced to music the pmv is a free base pornography porn purified of anything

that might disrupt its swift passage to the brain pmv artists like the influential noodle dude are treated like major artists within the community and have begun to grapple with the ethics of their work so like noodle dude is like it is like their version of taylor swift oh my god um the subculture has an offline component with real real world meetups like wristband guys parties which attempt to enforce rules of consent and healthy gooning so there's different colored wristbands for this event that you could indicate what you're interested in so all of these guys get together to jerk off together or goon they goon together gooning with the boys um and you get a wristband that indicates you know if you're if you're you don't want anything you're strictly

there to hang out and observe um you could wear another colored wristband that indicates that like you are curious about physical touch um and then i don't know what the other ones mean those were just kind of the examples that were given okay um which also feels kind of gay oh absolutely you know um and that's fine the goal said wristband guy is to foster conditions for a long healthy goon life so what was kind of like the juxtaposition between like wristband guy and the rest of like the the gooning community like he sees it as like a way of community of like oh you're just like you know jerking off with your boys like it's a place for us to get together and hang out and jerking off should be fun you know so that's why he has these and he

also encourages like take care of yourself like make sure you're hydrating and and whatever so he wants to like also include this kind of like take care of yourselves and like be good friends to each other it's like a burning man of gooning yeah absolutely um he said that when he hosts these like parties usually like you know 120 people will rsvp but like 12 will show up that's so awkward can you imagine if only like two show up showed up they would just have to like grapple each other off yeah well there's also the host wristband guy all right so three um a central troubling theme of gooner porn is spiritual degradation and self-annihilation encouraging viewers to ruin your mind and give up on life and then a quote from the article

if there is any coherent message to the sprawling folk art practices of goon world it is this kill yourself not literally but spiritually a porn producer who creates humiliating content for this market admits to questioning the ethics of feeding this addiction um it's a quote from the article says it's almost like a drug and we're almost like pushing that drug on addicts and honestly i question the ethics of it sometimes the article ends with a harrowing anecdote from a gooner about a friend who descended into a squalid isolated life illustrating the potential for severe severe real illustrating the potential for severe real world harm his room was littered with trash the bed was littered with trash the floor was littered with trash trash the floor

was also stained with piss and the walls were stained with cum and then like the the person who is like regaling this story like he says that like this guy disappeared offline and he like never saw him again so he was he like watched him kind of descent into madness like the more he saw like hung out with this guy virtually like the more his surroundings became just like trash and like you know living in squalor yeah squalor squalor living in squalor like i just feel like just like doing a little ayahuasca would do these guys a whole lot of good yeah i don't know do mushrooms yeah i will also you throw up i think maybe they would want that yeah i think they need to like they want an ego death right strip the ego from the bottom as

kendrick says that from jerking off no making porn compilations for each other just like this feels like the final boss of the internet like this is truly everything that the worst like the worst of what everything could become exists online yes yeah and that's one of the downsides of it i also i just can't get over this like no do you want to get back to stroking together hell yeah dude saturdays are for good and that's fucking awesome that's i am so like i'm so upset for gooning with the boys yeah i can't like i feel exhausted from that like i don't even know because it's like my oh even the guy writing the article like continuously says like i fucking hate knowing this yeah right i i wish i could go back to like 20 minutes ago honestly but

like it is fascinating to know that this is what is happening within these communities for sure like shit you would not even think about you know like my whole thing has always been to just let people do whatever the fuck they want if they're not harming anyone and then i hear things like this and i'm just like surely this isn't like this this feels like a pipeline into like violence for some reason to me like you know like the incel community is like you know notoriously violent yeah but this is i feel like beyond the incel community yeah to a point where yeah you are like only sexually attracted to pornography you do not have any attraction to real people and but that just feels like it's it's like giving they're so it's like a it's just addiction

it's straight up addiction yeah um there's a quote in the article let me see if i can find it that i really liked even this late in the game i struggled to understand how anyone could find this any of this pleasurable let alone addictive but then by the gooners own private admission despite their constant protest to the contrary on their preferred discord servers most of them are not actually addicted to porn in fact the research is far from settled on whether porn addicts in a clinical sense exist in the first place certainly they like porn a whole lot certainly they are aroused by the concept of being ruinously in its thrall certainly many of them are using porn to cope with some fairly serious life problems but what your average gooner is up to is basically

a kind of sad confusing role play like those lunatic trolls who emerge now and then to threaten the children of right-wing media targets the gooners are just having fun playing around saying the things one gets to one says to get ahead in their particular community most of the gooners i spoke with had no interest in completely surrendering their surrendering their lives to porn and many looked asked and many looked askance at the truly devoted ruined your mind pornosexual contingent those gooners the other gooners insisted are crazy they give gooners a bad name okay doesn't that sound like that literally sounds like maga like pointing at the gripers oh yeah yeah yeah no for sure like um but i can't entirely get behind the few bad

apple's theory nor can i so neatly separate the gooners as a whole from the rest of us think about it for a second what are these gooners actually doing wasting hours each day consuming short form video content chasing intensities of sensations across platforms parasocially fixating on micro celebrities who want their money broadcasting their love for those micro celebrities in public forums conducting bizarre self-experiments because someone on the internet told them to in general abjuring connective other directed pleasures for for the comfort of staring at screens alone does any of this sound familiar do you maybe know some folks who get up to stuff like this it's true that gooners are masturbating while they engage in these behaviors you could

say that only makes them more honest i think it's so true like you could compare this to any like deeply online community it's just one of them is kind of more socially acceptable than the other i guess but like it's also like like people do crazy shit to their skin because some influencers like this worked for me yeah that's true and they're usually peddling something but i don't think like i don't think that this is inherently bad but i do think that it's not good yeah you know like it's in comparison to shit well the next line is granted day in the life tiktoks or unboxing videos won't poison your soul to precisely the same degree as gooner porn right so it's just hard to not see goonerism as just an intensification almost a burlesque of prevailing

cultural trends that's a great way to say it yeah burlesque of prevailing cultural yeah that's great writing i love good writing yeah i know you do i know you'll send me articles i wish i could do it someday you are a good writer what the fuck i like do not really write anymore i know i love when you do thanks yeah whenever you're like i wrote something can you read it i'm like even if it's an email i have ideas i'm like maybe i'll write about that yeah and i never do well it's more work related too so i think that's also a thing we're like oh yeah do i want to be writing a thing about work not really no you don't even if i do think it's interesting fucking hell dude that i'm i'm like i am tapped in a way that i would be sorry for poisoning your

brain it's okay i forgive you you and the listeners i don't know if they forgive you sorry to everyone i forgive you um we got such a great email and i want to read it to you i'm excited am i gonna cry you might okay um the subject line is holy wedding spelled like the podcast our podcast the holy hour i don't know where this is gonna go i'm excited though she says hi girlies first i promise this email will be much shorter than the other one this was from somebody this is from um she signed it as portuguese girl i don't know if you remember yes okay she said well basically i got married to the guy i talked about in my last email it was amazing drag queens married us it was great and I wanted to tell you because your

podcast and the emails you guys share have normalized so many things about sex love and relationships for me I had so many uncomfortable conversations because you guys normalized so much even for fun stuff I had drag queens at my wedding because you and your listeners have normalized that my relationship should make me and my partner happy it doesn't have to follow any rules so we chose to have drag queens marry us and not to invite people that wouldn't fit the vibe aka non-queer allies that included my mom my mom and his dad but it is what it is anyways it was a long road but i love my sex life again and i have been loving my polyamorous marriage this podcast definitely gave me some ways to deal with some hard hurdles that came along thank you never doubt

your impact conversation is a form of resistance hugs portuguese girl oh that makes me so happy i also really love that like you first of all congratulations and now i want to have a drag queen marry me not marry me I mean I would I would marry a drag queen yeah but you know marry let's get frank on it yeah yeah yeah yeah um but married by a drag yes that's the right way to say it to and by yeah both can yeah um but I love that you called out in this email like how the like the listeners have also helped how you feel because like that's what we want like that's we've been saying from the beginning and it's so hard to like it's hard to make it a reality when y'all aren't like on board with making it a reality to make it a community yeah and you guys

from the jump have made this a community yeah you're our gooners i'm just kidding um we'll never refer to them as that nope that was the one and only time you're still our angels but like a goon munity this doesn't this this is so like cliche and like cheesy but like this doesn't work without y'all you know like oh my god what we want this podcast to be wouldn't be what it is without you guys and so the fact that like the discord exists and like there are we're getting emails like with y'all talking about each other in this way is like so beautiful to me and you it's beautiful to us but i just i don't know i just like yeah if we didn't have them we'd just be two bitches with microphones yeah and it's so easy to forget that like people are listening yeah

well yeah because it's just you and me recording yeah right texting each other all day yeah anyway we love y'all it's like it's cool well i think that uh should we do a little rapty do it'll be a short one let's rapty do and then we can move our converse our other conversation in next week yeah our performative male conversation yeah this will continue to be relevant but um well then we can do more homework on it yeah and if i i think if i talk anymore after that gooner conversation i'll fall asleep at the wheel on my home yeah i'm i'm tapped i don't know that exhausted me in a way that i didn't expect we don't need to talk about like i guess two different like subcultures of men you know not in one sitting yeah men's rights appreciation week was last week okay don't get

fucking greedy now um would you like to sing us out sure okay fucking neil armstrong i almost called you lance armstrong like the biker with one testicle could be both yeah he might sing like that also yeah especially with the one testicle that's that's i didn't know i was about to do it either biologically accurate it just came out of me okay let's let's okay yeah let's try do that again do it again yeah why not we love you you've got a friend in me oh my god oh my god in like a good way i just wasn't expecting that Thank you.