The Hoely Hour - He's Giving Dog

Episode Date: February 13, 2026

You’ve heard of horoscopes, but have you heard of judging people based on what role they played when they played house in preschool? We discuss what our ideal version of Heated Rivalry would be and list out what we thought was normal in our 20s that definitely wasn’t. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

i made that shirt for frank hold it up i bleached dyed it myself and everything it says i love my super hot beautiful girlfriend i just said in my head it's already the summer and then amelia said because the sun's out and the sun is out but it's fucking cold it's it's beautiful just to see it you know that's so true it does feed my soul in a way me and frank were like cloud in the sky dog out for a walk and we got outside we're like fuck that it's cold we just went on like a really quick like cold and breezy basically jogged around the block very brisk it's so cold it's very it's a humid cold which doesn't help yeah um i'm going to mexico this week basically for the first time well i suppose

i was in arizona over the weekend yeah um but people would never know dear listener forgot her phone i forgot my phone which is fucking insane so what happened is um mr liz was driving me to the airport uh i had been stressed all day traveling is stressful yeah fuck getting ready for any trip so i was already like stressed and i'm really stressed about work because it's our our busy season um so I had like I was thinking about work the whole time I was like surely I'm going to forget something but I had previously packed I was like I'm gone I'm gone for a day and a half and um I was like if I forget something it's not that big of a deal for some reason those trips are more stressful because like you are in the mindset of like I don't really need to think

about everything and then you forget the important shit yeah I was like okay I have you know I think i have the basics of what i need and then um i was like distracted getting into the car and i should have noticed when we got into the car because mr liz drove my car my phone didn't connect to the car oh and i should have noticed but i was like hmm yeah that's like funny yeah normally it connects and will automatically start playing mr liz is like can you turn it down i'm like calm the fuck down and he always does it when it's an audiobook and i'm like i'm not going to like mute my audiobook you have to wait until it connects and that like fully connects and the screen turns on so i could pause it right was he an animal i i started telling him i'm like

can you not freak out when my audiobook starts playing and he's like i'm gonna freak out so anyways it didn't connect and i was like well that's funny and i was a little stressed and then I started to become less and less stressed and then as we're getting ready to exit I was like I don't I don't know if I have my phone and then he was like are you serious and then he pulled off to the side and he tried calling it and I was like I know I don't have it because it didn't connect to the car it's not anywhere I would have put it and then he's like what do you want to do and I was like I don't I don't know yet like take the exit I'm gonna message my friend from your phone so I messaged her on Instagram this is like as we're all as we're leaving and then I was like

it's Liz I forgot my phone and she's like oh my god I'll pick you up from the airport thank god and well because Mr. Liz was like we can try and get it and make it back on time um you could take my phone and how early were you at that point like uh damn you can take my phone that's some like big healthy relationship energy yeah i was like wow yeah and i was like i appreciate the offer but also i'm i was kind of like what the fuck am i gonna do with this phone you know i'm not logged into any of my stuff that's fair i wouldn't be able to like i don't know my ticket number for my flight yeah like if anything i would have just taken it so i could like watch something on the plane right and then i was like i took a deep breath and i was like what would you

do if you were in my situation because i was like i have my id i have my wallet i did not have any other electronics no laptop no switch i was like god fucking damn it that isn't really you're like about to raw dog yes i literally raw dogged the flight luckily it was a short one thank god so that was i got i like felt so lost when i wandered in i was like i walked up to the ticket counter i'm sure my eyes were red because yes listener i did cry i would cry too especially after i was like i'm so fucking stupid i can't believe i forgot my phone because mr liz was initially annoyed that i didn't forget my phone and this is like this is such a specific like traumatizing thing for me because like growing up with adhd and not knowing that that's what you have and

like feeling like you're incompetent and stupid because you forget important things like i lost my id constantly and it wasn't on purpose like i would just lose important things and it made me feel stupid every time so the fact that i forget my phone like the thing that i need to like travel with for the most part like as something you're so dependent on for day-to-day stuff especially while traveling though right i just like and then i started crying and i was like i'm so stupid thing though about that is like I feel like when people hear that somebody forgot their phone and they like feel so lost and they like panic it's like oh well people did it for years and years true and also we haven't had to rely on like not have it like we've been able to rely on our phone for

everything for so long that that's just how the world works now yeah like you have like your ticket on your phone you talk to people that way you call ubers that way so it's like yeah it's not built a world to be dependent on it and it could be life or death because it's also kind of a security thing for yeah I was like if something happened to me I wouldn't have like an in case of emergency thing right like and then also you were coming off of being stressed the whole day yeah so I like had a mini meltdown I started crying Mr. Liz gave me a big hug and he was like it's okay you're not stupid like it's gonna be fine you're not you're not gonna be gone for very long and you can just message me from Anna's phone when you get there yeah when you get to

Arizona so uh my friend was waiting for me at like outside of the gate and I was like oh my god thank god she was like yeah I mean there was no way I was gonna know where you were but I and I at the last minute I wrote down her address and I had to write down Mr. Mr. Liz's phone number oh my god you're like going to jail I know it was so funny so funny so yeah it all worked out I I ended up like not really even needing it because we we didn't go anywhere I stayed with my friend we went down the street to her sister's house and then i left good so good i'm glad that it worked out because that is so nice it it it was only traumatizing for the first few minutes because i was like wandering through the airport i didn't know what fucking time it was i i was like how and

i forgot to put my watch on of course right so i was like i don't even know if my flight like what time it is like when will it how long until i it boards i was i was so confused i was looking at Frank's location at one point and saw that you were home on like Sunday morning and I was like that was a really quick trip and then yeah you texted me back you're like oh my god Amelia I didn't have my phone I will so I got a magazine and a little notebook before I left so I could write my feelings of how stupid I was in there um I ended up only writing a couple things down but like the magazines I got psychology today magazines you're so evolved like I would have definitely gotten like 17 or something yeah there wasn't i they don't they don't even make 17

magazines what do you mean you didn't know that they haven't made 17 magazine in a long time that's the worst news i've heard in so long and like the world is burning down and there's no there's no cosmo girl there wasn't even a cosmo yeah they don't sell cosmopolitan i found that out trying to find yeah i was like what the fuck a copy because i was what am i supposed to read i felt like such hot shit because i was in cosmopolitan and i was like i want to get a copy and they don't fucking sell it anywhere i was like oh i guess never mind this isn't even like a thing anymore thanks jeff 15 years ago yeah thanks it's definitely jeff bezos's fault yeah everything is somehow well did does he did he buy conde nast probably or i would if i had

all that money because i don't know if they bought if they bought conde nast but i do know that he bought vanity fair for lauren sanchez as a wedding gift that's the most insane shit i've ever heard of my life as a wedding gift wait was it vanity fair i might be wrong i just feel like buying a publication for someone is like a chore like i feel like when people buy me a plant i'm like i love getting plants but it's also like fuck i have to take care of this thing now if somebody bought me a publication yeah like what do you want me to do you want me to have another job yeah i don't want to have a job thanks honey wow um yeah not i not to like keep saying this but genuinely i mean this like not having a phone was so nice i it was like having a detox or something like i almost

resented having a phone again yeah because it i don't know it's just stressful to have this like little constant our brains are not meant to be like looking up every single thing and having so much access to like constant information and yeah it it it was surprised i like was like i wonder if I'm gonna have withdrawals from my phone I did not good it is like I sure I've told the story on the podcast pictures I will say that well so when I studied in Italy I threw my phone into the washing machine by accident halfway through oh shit yeah so I didn't have a lifeline to home and yeah that's crazy for the first like few days I was like what the fuck do I do this is crazy this is the worst thing ever and then like once that wore off I felt the same way that you

did when I got my phone back I was like I don't fucking want this shit like yeah I don't know I was so much more present like everybody else was taking photos so i didn't have to worry about it i had like a film camera so i was like i won't know what these look like until i get them developed like it felt very like i was just there so analog analog is gonna be in i can already feel it damn i think it was just nice like not i i don't know if you do this but like with social media apps especially right now everything is like i'm constantly being like bombarded with just like the worst fucking thing you've ever heard you know that's and that is just what it's like right now yeah it's just everything is just the worst you're being dumped on like all of the worst

things possible and reading everyone's stupid fucking take and everyone's mad and it's exhausting yeah and I was like once I came home I was like you know what maybe I just don't need to like I don't need to constantly be seeing everyone's opinion and I can limit my news intake I can be informed without having to like be watching it happen in real time like to the second um i was at a baby shower for everyone listening and um it was in arizona where it was like everyone everyone in scottsdale is always wearing like pastels and stuff and then i roll in only having like a black wardrobe i saw that in the picture everyone was wearing like bright pink yeah and i knew that was gonna fucking happen i knew it was gonna happen but i was looking through my wardrobe

up and I was like everything I have is like what I wear to work yeah because what I wear at home is just like I'm lounging around but I'm not one of these cute Scott Steele girls going to brunch yeah and that's because it's not sunny here right I was gonna say nor should you be and that's just like also not me uh like I don't have colorful clothes um because I don't like how they look on me so I was wearing all black the same thing happened at this friend's birthday in Hawaii everyone's wearing like colorful clothes and I was wearing like I didn't even think about it I was wearing an athletic dress and I was like yeah I'm in my athletic dress yeah and then uh someone called me the Wednesday Adams of the group and I was like you're not wrong that's so funny they

were like you would wear all black to a baby shower and I was like I'm sorry that's really funny i don't it was just so funny the pictures it was like you were such like a you stuck out like a sore thumb it was so funny everything's like beautiful and colorful and pastel and i'm like in my all black outfit my sunglasses honestly it's it was true to you and that i looked like a vampire pale skin all black outfit you're the seattle representation speaking of the seattle representation let's fucking go um suck it patriots speaking of suck it i would suck bad bunnies dick clean off okay i have not seen the super bowl you have i know i have not had a second to like i know you i understand

you have to watch it yeah it's so it was what it was in the top three for me and a lot of people i bet it was so fucking good it was the the couple of clips i've seen look super fun so i'm looking forward to sitting down and watching the whole thing i saw this post on threads that somebody was like there's no guillotine in the world that could stop me from the amount of head that i would give bad bunny it's like that is so genius he's so great and then also turning point usa did their own halftime show have you heard anything about that i have heard about that i saw a couple clips and i thought initially when i saw one of them i was like what is this from and i thought it was also like a parody of like it felt like it of country music i've just been watching like it's

it's on the tv right now i was watching anthony fantano react to it because i don't want to give them any more streams and it's yeah it is very funny oh oh my god yeah the guy who was singing about like cold beer yep like it really truly felt like a country parody and also like telling his daughter that girls little girls are not little boys it's like really we have to like shoehorn in just some like egregious transphobia when there's at this point the transphobia just feels like a bit it does like are you being serious yeah surely you can't be serious right but it's so true they literally try and tack on like transphobia onto just like anything yeah i'm like how how are you even connecting these two there's no connecting and i saw another thing

that was like um like a conservative person had posted a um trans man in the women's bathroom and they're like what is going on there's a trans man in the women's bathroom and someone reposted and it was like isn't this what you guys wanted like are you i was about to say are you dense but yeah yeah they are stupid this is why we brought back the r word yeah exactly i keep thinking that i'm like god like we really just needed something this was the closest we could get to a slur to describe to describe you that's crazy uh so okay so i have a few topics today yes i can't wait um i want to do them in a specific order because i think the last one is going to take the longest first question just a little icebreaker moment okay so okay heated rivalry right

yes period that's it i was thinking last night yeah that's the end of the thought i was thinking last night like what would my ideal version of heated rivalry be like what sport or like what like like hobby that like that isn't hockey what would your heated rivalry be like what would i want to watch yeah like what would be the sexiest like like gay love story to watch it has to be a gay love story like everything is the same but it's a different activity than hockey um well for me personally i do prefer more of a an enemies to lovers romance this wasn't really an enemies to lovers to me this was fuck buddies to lovers that at no point were they enemies yeah i mean they were enemies in the eyes of the media yeah well their teams are technically rivals but

like there was never any like they never were fighting on the ice like yeah it kind of did feel like at least in the first scene when ilia was like you're not going to beat us and shane was like yeah well we'll see about that shane was a poorly written character an asshole yeah you're an asshole yeah fuck you he said that like 900 times i'm like did they does shane have a did they give this man any sort of like personality backstory i don't think that they did but maybe that was on purpose maybe because he hadn't really like found himself he's shy yeah he hadn't really found himself yeah um okay so answer the question if you have one i i can't think of like another type of hobby that i would prefer you know it's more of the rest of the storyline

that matters to me okay and i do just i like a slow burn enemies to lovers that's fair the other day i was thinking in great detail about the kylo ren and rey storyline of i i consider that a slow burn romance and if you're listening and you're like what the fuck like i don't i didn't see that at all because a lot of people thought like the kiss and the final uh movie was like out of nowhere but if you're watching the whole thing from the perspective of like a dark romance it absolutely makes sense hell yeah if you're because people are all like caught up with the force and the politics and whatever but like there's clearly a very they're a dyad in the force sure go off queen they're like soulmates in the force all right so they're dyad in the force

and in the second movie they're just like you're like well they're trying to kill each other but it's because fighting is the only physical thing they can do and that's hot okay okay i'm following your train of thought right now so like a little bit more like enemies to lovers yeah backstory yeah i want them to have like a clear connection like they're both like interested romantically and sexually in each other but there's some thing that is like majorly dividing their like creating major conflict between them yeah okay i like a very hard to resolve conflict that makes sense so if we're thinking about star wars which we are right now it's like kylo ren he wants to he wants to be the ruler he wants to start a new like empire or whatever um and that

is not what ray wants ray wants like fairness and equality and so when he's like come with me we can change everything she says no because and he's like confused because he's like i can tell that you like me we're a dyad you've been like making eyes at me from across the room all day we can see each other via the force we can touch each other through the force when has that ever happened and um she it's because she's like i can't like that is not what's right or fair and he needs to realize that she's like i don't want to take kylo ren's hand i want to take ben solo's hand so what i'm hearing is you want heated rivalry to be more star wars yeah basically okay that's the answer that i was looking for it's it's the dark romance plot point

if it weren't i'm trying to think of like what would be like a exciting activity i'm sure you have an answer to this well i think my answer would be rugby rugby because like i love the build of rugby boys lacrosse surfers look yeah you see that feels a little bit too soft for me like lacrosse there is some like i get i don't all the lacrosse boys that i know frank played lacrosse he's gonna listen to this and be like wait but all the lacrosse boys that i know are very like uppity oh that's funny i because i feel like lacrosse boys are just future fraternity boys yeah that is the pipeline like sometimes they can be uppity but i think that like lacrosse is like there's something like kind of pretty boy jock about it you know yeah it's very suburban well

the thing about rugby players to me is like they're all so large and like there's so much like the majority of the sport is just like concussing yourself um and i'm not like condoning that but i just i'm not condoning concussion i just think in terms of like a storyline like i love that the idea of there being like a lot of physicality okay on the field and off the field there's also a lot of physicality well i already thought hockey players were hot i would send you videos of hockey players stretching yeah and they are hot hockey players are hot just by association yeah yeah okay well so your answer was star wars and mine is rugby which I honest to god kind of feels like on brand for both of us I like when

there's a magic element involved that's true you do yeah that makes sense because it helps me um further distance myself from reality that's so true that's such a good point when I die I want to be reincarnated in another universe where being a witch is like a real thing yeah you know yeah i want to i want a wand and i want to fly on a broom that would be so fucking sick imagine i think i would be a i guess if i grew up flying i wouldn't be afraid of it but thinking about it now i'm like that's scary window cleaners that is the craziest job nuts that it's a job yeah and i looked up how much they make in seattle because i'm in a high rise at work and i we see people cleaning the windows all the time yeah and i'm like good money they just

they just no they don't make that good good of money that's shocking in my opinion because like crane operators make six figures yeah they're not even making six figures that's crazy these people are just like repelling down the side of a building we've been watching um seinfeld like every episode of seinfeld like in order and there's we just watched an episode where george are you familiar with steinfeld a little so george is he just like i mean the whole the show is about nothing obviously but george saw a security guard standing at the front of a store and was like i'm sure he wants to sit down and like took it like upon himself to like get this man a chair and then like the store ended up getting robbed because the security guard fell

asleep in his chair and like i just felt very connected to that because it's like i hear that these window cleaners aren't making a lot of money and i'm like i want to write to the city like i want to change that also who's paying them is the building paying for yeah i think so yeah so i don't know if the city would be able to do anything but it just feels like for like jobs that are so risky the city should be in charge of like a like a salary minimum demanding yeah like crane operators there's i'm pretty sure there's a salary minimum because it's so dangerous yeah i think window cleaners should be making six figures yeah so that's now what this podcast is about sorry it's so scary to me i know it's scary to me too okay moving along how long have we been

yapping oh great we are right on track okay so i realized last night that i so you know in preschool you would play house and there was always the mom or the parent the baby and the dog those were like the three roles yeah i think that you can tell dads you can tell what everybody was just by looking at them you were the dog yes see what i mean and were you i feel like you would have played the big sister that's what i would have preferred yeah yeah i didn't really want to be the mom yeah well so i put together a list of how many people is this one two three four five six seven people and you're going to tell me if you think that if they would have played the parent the baby or the dog i do like this okay okay i'm locked in okay the first one ben

shapiro if he would be the mom the baby or the dog ben shabibo i think would want to be the mommy ben shabibo he wants to be a mommy okay i can see that see because he just wants to be the boss yeah that's fair okay okay candace owens clandice owens um i think that she would also be the mom i'm still laughing about ben shabibo yeah candace owens is she is giving mom yeah they would not be playing house together just for they wouldn't there would be some conflict and we know that they would not want to want two moms in that household and ben is just like he talks so much that i can't imagine he would be a very good dog or a very good baby yeah that really only leaves mom yeah it does feel like there are some he's also very naggy like i made a video on this today

and for mitch mcconnell i said i think that he probably wanted to be the dad and they were like not you're gonna be the baby and then he would just start barking yeah it feels like some people are that slippery slope yeah and ben shibibo feels like he would be that slippery slope to me like it feels like he would want to be the parent he would get he would get demoted to baby and then would just start acting like a dog and then they'd find a reason to kick him out of the play group yeah i feel like this isn't really fun right we're gonna go play a different game without you yeah it only includes two people there's actually no babies or dogs in this one and we already have the parent role filled so can you go find something else playing a single adult

women yeah anyways continue um caroline levitt caroline levitt i think that she would be the dog you think so yeah i could see it actually i know you're right i could totally see her wanting to be she's very obedient she is but also just like without knowing anything about her personality just looking at her i feel like it's like oh that was she she looks like a horse girl like she was a horse girl so i and i feel like the horse girl to dog pipeline is strong totally yeah totally i feel like submissive people play the dog yeah you know that's real yeah or want to be the dog that's interesting and they don't want to be part of the family drama especially because like being a wolf is like such like an alpha thing yeah whoa okay

Jeff Bezos Jeff Bezos like what would he be I think he would be the baby but I think I just think that because he's bald yeah I haven't given anyone the baby yeah he does look like a baby he's also getting baby just in that I don't really think that he does much I do think he would be the baby yeah yeah you are right yeah he's more to be pampered yeah you know he wants to be taken care of by his minions donald trump donald trump uh also plays the baby i think so too that's what i said big baby guy he's giving baby yeah allegedly he wears diapers i was gonna say he poops his pants like a baby yeah he poops his pants like a baby he is a baby you know incontinence is not funny unless

is donald trump and then it's hilarious you know it is kind of funny yeah in general i mean but there are some like health problems that lead to incontinence yeah but i do feel like people that have those health problems could probably laugh about it you know it's like oh yeah i shit my pants sometimes like i would probably lean into that i mean at some point you do have to laugh yeah if you're shitting your pants you do have to laugh at yourself a little bit that's so real kid rock kid rock the headliner of the turning point usa halftime show dog yeah oh absolutely that does feel like the easiest one yeah he's giving dog that he's not giving anything else no i i think dog is also the least effort you need to put into your role yeah you don't have

you don't have to think of a dialogue yeah you can go do whatever you want you don't have to create backstory bark yeah for someone who lip syncs his performances yeah and has a song called is probably that he's gonna he's a dog for sure ball with a ball to bang to bang sounds like exactly okay last one erica kirk i think erica erica kirk seems like she would want to play the dog but then um she'd be so fucking annoying and like bossy that she they'd be like you can't be the dog yeah you're trying to control the whole thing yeah it feels like erica kirk would want to be the dog but then would also want everybody else in the scene to be a dog yeah so i think she's like mom dog being i think she would end up being uh a baby okay yeah she doesn't give me mom

yeah maybe she would be mom i don't know yeah but she definitely seems like someone who would want to be the dog but then she would be too bossy and then she would like have somebody like i don't know like assassinate like her dog husband and then like take over like the dog kingdom allegedly okay i don't think that's the end of the game but seriously i don't think that she i kind of don't think that she like loves charlie no at all no absolutely not i think that she's been trying to become famous like her entire life yeah uh and this was finally her chance liz and i a few weeks ago made lists of what things that we thought were normal in our 20s that are absolutely not normal and I have three how many do you have I just started listing random

things okay I only just did three because I feel really strong about this list okay so do you want to start first since you have more yeah um my first one something I thought was normal in my 20s was kind of hating your boyfriend that's I kind of hated every boyfriend I had oh my god that's so real they're like such an inconvenience yeah you kind of hate that yeah it's like why is you like you're like this fucking big idiot i wish i could change parts of your personality so i could like i would like you more that's so funny that is such like a 20s experience yeah just kind of not liking the person you're in a relationship with yeah okay love it okay thinking that anxiety is a sign that someone is right for me oh like always being on edge about the person

that i'm dating it's like oh this is for sure the guy for me because i care a lot not normal yeah like i wouldn't feel this strongly if it if it wasn't like right a karmic soul connection or some dumb shit exactly no you are just running on adrenaline uh-huh you're creating anxious situations your body is in fight or flight yeah yeah this this man is putting you in fight or flight yeah yeah that's not normal that's not love that's not love um another thing i thought was normal in my 20s throwing up from drinking on a bi-weekly and sometimes weekly basis damn i threw up all the time it was disgusting yeah that's i mean your teeth are still recovering yeah um well and i drink a lot of coffee so that might have something to do with my animal

i don't know listen drinking throwing up from drinking all the time is not normal and even now i'm like i'll have maybe a drink on the weekends and it's like a beer or like prosecco or something it's sometimes i'm fancy sometimes i'm feeling fancy and i want a nice french 75 a bougie cocktail but it's more now it's more about drinking for pleasure but before it was drinking so i would black out yeah everyone around me was blacking out totally that's that's why we think it's normal in our culture yeah it is i'm like how is this fun i can't think of anything worse than being around a bunch of drunk college kids i just watched this blacked out college kids i follow this guy on youtube who um approaches strangers and gives them a disposable camera

and like has them send back it's so cool and he did a bunch of um like the final week of college for seniors like he did he got like 12 cameras back and i'm the majority of them i'm sure he couldn't show what was on them but like the pictures were so like i was like i'm like i miss that you know it was like shit just like didn't matter back then you know we were getting fucked up all the time and then just like we were able to function you know you can't do that anymore we've got responsibility and our bodies are breaking down what the fuck okay my next one is uh treating my depression as a personality trait oh not normal like it's i i do identify with my depression and anxiety but like how i would talk about it in my 20s i was just like

yeah i'm a depressed girly like that was also like how everybody was talking about yeah mental health and it's just not normal yeah you know because it's not like a cool thing i guess it's like cool i guess like trying to make it into a cool thing kind of like reduces the sting of it a little bit it made it i feel like i feel like the way that people were talking about it as being like a quirky little personality trait helped make it feel more normal to talk about yeah that's fair even though it was like maybe kind of cringe and also like maybe not the healthiest way of thinking about yeah um um yeah depression anxiety or whatever um at least it it started kind of leveling the conversation absolutely making it so shameful that's very true it's like people

talking more and more about like going to therapy and like how going to therapy was like a cool thing yeah normalized it too yeah so okay so it wasn't normal but it was normal for the times yeah okay i'll amend that i mean same with like drinking till you black out it's not normal but it was normal when I was 21 right surrounded by everyone else who was doing it yeah uh I have two more that are or I guess I have a handful more um getting a good job right out of college oh my god that was gonna be normal yeah then that shit doesn't work like that yeah I just like had kind of a delusional mindset that like whatever I wanted would just happen yeah I'm like oh well surely I will just get that job well up until that point like everything's laid out for you

you like go to elementary school and then middle school and then high school and then college yeah I and I lived a very like my life was not very like complicated or had not challenged me in very many ways yeah so it was just kind of like yeah I can kind of get whatever I'm thinking about yeah whatever I put my mind to and it's not that I had any like crazy desires or anything but yeah the idea that you're gonna get a high-paying job right out of college is like unrealistic and it's becoming even more and more unrealistic I think it should be realistic yeah but I definitely was like I'm gonna get a job at the Disney Channel or something yeah just something delusional so funny that is such a 20s thought um not thinking about the logistics of how something will happen

oh yeah um i mean that's like that feels like a bottom line just like that that sentence is very like feels normal in your 20s yeah that is so it's very 20s yeah uh the other couple of things um i thought that almond shaped nails looked good on me they do not i don't think oh and i look at pictures now i'm like no they don't look good on me oh um interesting i think they look good on other people totally but i think that i just had never considered that like different shape nails look different on different people i just hadn't considered that i don't know i i i only think that about me i don't look at other people and think they shouldn't have almond shaped nails yeah yeah yeah it's just when i look at pictures of myself i'm like so funny why did i think that that looked

that fit me that's fair maybe it did talk you're looking at me with short nails i'm like um i keep looking at amelia's nails because they are so shiny and beautiful are they fun yeah they're like a blue chrome they're my mexico nails oh thank you that's a good good nails i got thank you uh the last one the last thing i thought was normal in my 20s that is not normal was um to be wary of the women your boyfriend is friends with wow that's a good one because and i've been thinking about this kind of like a lot like it it's not normal to always be worried about like your boyfriend around other women yeah and there's a few reasons i think like why people are like they might have a partner who is not trustworthy who doesn't have normal friendships

with women and is always like there's also kind of this like co-dependent dynamic between certain men and women where like the the man is only friends with women they see as potential dating options and the woman entertains that friendship because she likes the attention even though she has zero intention of ever being in a relationship with this person and this kind of like codependent dynamic like can really interfere with other relationships like romantic relationships yeah so I think there's like I'm not saying there's no cause to be wary I'm just saying that like it shouldn't be like you your partner should have normal friendships with women yes that you don't feel worried when like they're hanging out with them

because they see women as people yeah but that's also such like a like a person in their 20s thing to just not see the the gender that they're interested in as people yeah you know when I turned third actually no really like when I started dating Frank really was when I started to be like like no I want to like I want to meet all your girlfriends and not in a way that's like I don't feel like I need to be like saccharine to them which is how it was before I used to feel like I had to be like the nicest bitch on the planet so that they like wouldn't feel like they like so they wouldn't they couldn't step on any toes guilty if they which is not how the other woman it's just not how I mean that is like I understand that way of thinking yeah and I would

say Mr. Liz was the first person I dated where I was like oh I don't need to be wary yeah but I also had to learn that right I had to learn that by meeting his friends and like understanding how he views his friendships and engages with his friends yeah and there have been circumstances where like I know I've joked about this before but it it is true like everyone's in love with Mr. Liz like people just are kind of obsessed with him and it would make me uncomfortable and feel insecure when I could tell like a woman he was friends with had romantic feelings for him and he was unaware of that yeah you know and um there were times where like well I guess this only really happened once there it kind of happened twice one person was trying to like flirt with

him and he was just like not he either did not notice or was just like accidentally saying things that would just shut it down because he's not interpreting the conversation that way yeah yeah really fun that is really funny and then another person just kind of straight up crossed a line and made him really uncomfortable and I like a younger more insecure version of me would have been very bothered um but instead I was like well you know how how do you feel like yeah like don't think about me in this circumstance like this is your friendship yeah I was like well how do you feel about it and then he was like i it makes me uncomfortable like now i feel like it ruined our friendship because like i think as women you can we can relate to like

finding out a guy is only being our friend because they like want to sleep with us yeah or like see us as someone that they like could maybe date one day as an option they see you as an option um and it does suck because you're like this is not a real friendship then this isn't a genuine in friendship right so yeah yeah and then he was like I don't know what to do and I was like well you can say that it made you uncomfortable you also don't have to talk to them at all so yeah but yeah I don't know it's not normal to think to always be on edge about that yeah and I also think there's like I would have to probably do more research about this but there's also just kind of this marketing or something where women are taught to think that like men

are a resource and well no you know I think that might be inherited because men did have to be a resource for women because women didn't have as many rights and freedoms so they needed to treat men like a resource for survival yeah so when you have this mindset that men are a resource and resources are limited then other women are not safe to be yeah yeah it's like a survival thing at that point yeah yeah and then also when you're when you're trying to find a partner through the lens of having somebody as a resource I think it also like blinds you to such like egregious red flags like when I stopped feeling like I needed a man was when I really started paying attention to like people's hearts you know instead of like well what can this person provide

to me because it's like i don't need i don't fucking need anyone to provide some people do and i'm not knocking them for that but like it did make me look at it through a different lens to be like no this is just like another person i'm choosing to live my life with yeah just so happens that he also like is like he provides you know what i mean but like when you're looking at it through a lens that isn't that you see people so much clearer and like it just it really changed how i dated to not like need a man you know and as we're talking about this i'm also kind of thinking like uh viewing men as a resource is kind of the other side of the coin of wanting women to be trad wives like if you want a traditional wife a traditional wife is not going to be someone who

is guaranteed to love you right like and that's like kind of the expectation now that's so unrealistic of like I want you to be in love with me and loyal to me and let me cheat on you because that's just like how men are made and like take care of me and not view me as a paycheck or a resource but like if you want someone who's going to be a trad wife you have to be a resource that can provide all of the things that they need to be able to live a traditional wife lifestyle yeah i was just i was thinking about erica kirk because she definitely saw her husband as a resource yeah he had money yeah and really little teeth yeah um i'm like he couldn't have gotten a lip flip yeah a lip flip veneers like there are options for him yeah

yeah not anymore i'm not a big fan unfortunately please keep that in exhume the body and give them veneers yeah i think my favorite thing is when people make ai pictures of him and they make him clearly like way better looking than he actually looks which is so insulting if somebody made an ai picture of me that was more attractive i'd be like why did you feel the need to do let's let's be real he was not a good looking person no i think everybody can agree on that anyways um my last thing that i thought was that was nor hello i feel like the ghost of charlie kirk is like coming to enter yeah well he we do have microphones that's so true and he loved those he loved my he's charlie we are charlie kirk the last thing

that i thought was normal in my 20s was romanticizing burnout i just needed to close the the loop on that because that was one the last i mean that was like a big girl boss era thing we were part of the girl boss era kind of that tail end but like i would say 2008 to 2012 was like peak girl bossery yeah yeah and then you're so right trickle off you know yeah it was also like i felt like i needed to let everybody know all the time how busy i was now if i tell people it's because i'm really fucking busy yes you know but now it's because i'm mad yeah like i don't want to be busy yeah before it was like oh my god i did so much today i want to be living a slow life yeah because i i just want peace i want peace in my day-to-day i want to be using my free time

doing shit i enjoy i don't want to be busy no no and i am i think covid made me less of a busy body wow well because i started staying you know we had to stay home yeah and then you start staying home and realizing how fucking awesome it is that's so real it had the opposite effect on me because i was like i don't have to go anywhere so i guess i'm just gonna get a lot of shit done you know what i mean i feel like i started off getting shit done and now i am unable to get shit done yeah it's yeah that makes sense and also is so fair yeah i'm just gonna like take it slow but we also do we like as as people in corporate america we do so much bullshit all the fucking time yes i think that's why it's so hard for me like i'm like are we like

i can't be the only person who feels like i'm pretending yeah but i think everybody maybe not everybody but a lot of people do feel like they're just doing like corporate theater you know oh yeah um and i just i don't take my corporate theater role very seriously no once upon a time i did yeah and maybe that is also something that you think is normal in your 20s that is not yeah the older i get i've been talking to my mom more about just like how did she feel about work you know even though we had two totally different jobs like she was a teacher um and i work in marketing like yeah they're very different but i was just like just your general attitude towards working for like 40 50 years of your life like how does that change over time

yeah and I was like did you love your job the entire time you were doing it and she was like no right I did not that's why I left the classroom it's also really interesting though because there's so many other factors like because I mean like our parents aren't from like a wildly different generation but like times have changed so much my mom was in advertising and worked with all men and so like god yeah you know it was like she had that lens of like what was working like and i'm sure that it's similar with your mom like it's like oh well it was just like different for women yeah even 20 years ago which is crazy you know like shit times have just changed so it'd be interesting to see like uh i'm sure that there are like psychology studies on that like how like

female perceptions of like working has changed over time you know i'd be curious about that anyway i guess we'll never know i guess we'll never know because i'm not going to read that paper i anytime one of my favorite little do you ever do a little joke to yourself or like between you and frank yeah um one of my favorite little bits that i do is uh if mr liz mr liz loves to ask a million questions and then expects me to look them all up for him um and sometimes we'll be discussing something and he'll like wonder something aloud and then i'll i'll say there's no way to know that's really funny there's no way to no way to find out that's yeah it would be i wish we had a way to find out sometimes he will direct

to me he will literally say will you look that up that's will you look it up or he'll like try and fact check me in real time and i'll look something up damn it is very satisfying when i'm right oh that's the best feeling i'm not always right and that's fine yeah but then i'll be like i i'm not trying to like be right or wrong okay i'm trying to talk yeah is that too much i'm just a girl yeah i'm just a girl i'm just a baby i'm not an encyclopedia i also can't even remember what I've read versus what I've watched versus like where did I learn this information I don't know it's just kind of all bouncing around in there and you get what you get okay I never claimed to be right I feel like sometimes I say I'm so sure that I'm right about

something and I say it out loud and I'm like that I just got that fact so wildly wrong but it's already out and he's already challenging me on it so I'm like I'm doubling down on this incorrect fact do you ever say a take just to kind of test it you know you haven't really thought about the take and then you say it out loud and then yeah you're like you know what actually i don't think that honestly i feel like having a conversation with your boyfriend is a sport yeah it just is you know with mine specifically no with any boyfriend with any boyfriend yes it's a sport you're sparring especially a especially a boyfriend like our boyfriends are very like um i don't know they're like deep thinkers yeah not all the time but like they are asking a lot

of questions right and that's how they like operate every day yeah so then they're asking you a bunch of questions and i'm gonna answer them whether i know the answer or not uh-huh i'm gonna do my best i'm gonna answer it and pretend i know and it is really it is fun to well because some people have boyfriends that don't talk that's so true which that would be crazy i mean i don't know what i would do i love that for some of you guys but i could never do that couldn't be me it couldn't it could not be me um well we've been talking for an hour and you gotta make dinner phone yeah i do it is my dinner night are you making stir fry probably fuck yeah i'll either make stir fry or chicken lettuce wrap sounds pretty good

god i fucking love chicken and i made them the other week they're very easy trader joe's has a recipe on their website if you're ever like i don't know what to fucking make go to Trader Joe's website they have it all listed out and it's all the stuff at Trader Joe's so like I want to work for Trader Joe's corporate that would be so fun it would be but I also think there I have read that they have been problematic Trader Joe's corporate the the Joe Joseph that doesn't surprise me they also used to call their Chinese food Trader Ming's yeah like what are y'all doing there was a yeah they did did they stop doing that finally yeah yeah they did that with like yeah traitor jose uh-huh yeah bizarre like it's just we were in

such a different i mean that wasn't okay then but for for it to pass through enough hands to get to the shelves and it was it went on for a little too long yeah it did i think they really did um well traitor mings i forgot about that that's just great like that's crazy right yeah i think it's there was no reason to do that there wasn't that's the thing that's why it's like it's still this is the least authentic like it's not you're not trying to like cosplay as like genuine chinese food yeah i know what i'm buying i don't need to have a different it's trader joe's just be trader joe's anyway lego would you like to sing yes good we love you our children That's all I know

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