The Hoely Hour - Men's Appreciation Week!

Episode Date: October 31, 2025

You read that right, folks! We love men!!! What do small gestures and small ankles have in common? They both make Amelia horny apparently. Liz thirsts over parallel parking, and people are having less sex than ever. Happy Halloween! Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

he doesn't he just likes to see it bounce around he doesn't actually typical boy do you get it that was a butt joke all right um so last week liz uh drove the bus the hoe bus um and so this week i'm driving the hoe bus it's a lot less organized and um a lot less uh like singular topic focused yeah but i will say i think that the overall theme is like men's appreciation day men's appreciation day unfortunately wow you've never done one of those i i had to hold back gagging when i was writing this all down i'm just kidding we love been here um but before we dive in uh we threw a surprise party for Liz on Saturday yeah which

was really funny because I the previous week I had been teasing Mr. Liz about not having a surprise party for me I was like no one's ever had a surprise party for me which is not true because he's actually planned a surprise party for me I think I was like also so depressed at the time that I forgot that's fair but he was like well I planned a little surprise for when you um got promoted but I did not get promoted I got a different job title so it was a lateral move and it was a job I hated so I was like well things are slightly better but a surprise celebration did improve it did the experience of course and then surprise birthday I was just like I just kept like yeah teasing him like so you didn't plan a surprise party right and then he's like no and

then I had the birthday blues and then he was like are you sad because I didn't plan a surprise party for you and I was like no not at all like I'm just sad because the concept of time and age uh sometimes I think about it too much yeah sometimes I think about dying too much yep and then when it's your birthday and you're thinking about getting older I don't know all those things compound so yeah it was it was uh they they very much did surprise me I think I think it was so fun i mean it was like it was the best thing ever watching her like realize in stages that there was like it was a surprise party okay i'll set the scene for y'all so me mr liz frank and liz were all gonna go out and get drinks on saturday that was the ruse and uh so i was there 30 minutes

early hadn't even thought about turning off my location a few people there were like i thought to turn off my location before coming here and i was like that's so fucking genius because i'm never anywhere 30 minutes early I'm never checking I always forget I have people's locations that's I just use it to find my airpods oh and I misplaced that's a good way to use it but uh so like I was already like kind of hectic like making sure that everyone was there that was supposed to be there and then like we hadn't figured out whether or not we were going to like jump out and say surprise or if we were all just going to be there so we like figured out a plan to like everybody was gonna be like facing the back wall like looking at beers because this place had like refrigerators

on the whole back wall of beers um and so Liz came in with Mr. Liz and I was like so I'm so glad that you didn't catch on I was like so uncool about because I was just like she's a great actress in the moment I was just like I'm about to fuck this up but we hadn't figured out next strategy for everybody to say surprise so everyone was just standing there with their backs to Liz for like two or three minutes just not knowing when to come out and then Mr. Liz texted everyone to jump out and and first Liz made eye contact with two of our friends and she just thought that they were they just happened to be there yeah I thought they were like hey you guys are here too like because they're the first people that I saw and I was like oh hi and then everyone was like

surprise i was like oh yeah i really wish that somebody got that on camera it was so they did a good job it was so sweet it was a fun night yeah it was like chill but we still got to it it was i like being able to like hear everyone talking you know or like be able to move around freely and it's not too loud so i feel like it was perfect good i'm glad you feel that way it was a very blustery night oh my god so sweet it's like mr liz was a good co-planner with me i had no idea where the fuck to go i hadn't even heard of this place that we went i was very so it was it's a beer place yeah and i was surprised that amelia had suggested a beer place see i would have thought that something was up if i were you and i suggested a beer place i

was like well i do like that place but i don't know if i want to do beer and i had debated asking if we could go somewhere else i was really worried about that i was like i think i'd rather have a cocktail but i was like man whatever maybe i'll feel we'll see how i'm feeling when i get there yeah i want oh i figured mr liz would like adjust you if you were like i don't really feel like going there mr liz suggested amelia say like i really want to try the fresh hopped beer he like gave me a script and i was like what if you had said that i'd be like since when yeah and fresh hopped beer is a real thing it's delicious it's like i don't know there's something that is so i don't know it just tastes so good there's some it's like complex but still like

a nice flavor um and it only is during the fall and that is entirely lost on me there's just like a few weeks where there's fresh hopped beer see i don't like hoppy beer and then i don't like beer that isn't hoppy it's not hoppy but i feel like when beer isn't hoppy it tastes like pee but that i don't like the alternative you know what i mean like our friend got like a beer that the guy there was like oh even people that don't like beer like this and you don't like it i fucking hated it i was like this just tastes like stale piss that's so funny because i was like i don't know if i've really seen amelia drink no i hate beer i really wish i was like a cool bitch that could like hang and drink beer i've always wanted to be a bitch that could drink beer

and that's just never gonna happen for me i'll have to train you i you might like porters oh like i like i started with dark beers and then i moved into i went kind of opposite started with dark beers moved into ipas and then went into light beers that's so cool to me like now i only like light beer ipas are your taste buds burned off like yeah who the fuck likes ipas too many men it's and then multiple ipas like i feel like after one i'm like yeah i don't know it's just too intense it is i just feel too full every time i drink any beer yeah i wonder if you have a gluten intolerance i mean i think it's i think one beer is like the equivalent of a loaf of bread is that what they say oh like in terms of gluten i might be making that up it sounds right to me

yeah everything you say is correct yeah uh everything i say is an essence of correctness it has the essence of being accurate that is that's a bar well i'm glad that you had a good birthday thank you thanks for making it great oh you're welcome i love you make birthdays great i cut my bangs too short and i'm feeling self-conscious about them we're both having a bad day sometimes they're cunt yeah and then i look great right now right now my hair in general is just a weird texture oh i don't know why it looks very silky i think i didn't wash all of the shampoo or conditioner out yeah i hate that feeling i was high when i took a shower last night so I was just very in my head like abstractly thinking about different things and not really

paying attention to the steps in my hair washing routine okay you know yeah I get that I think you're paying your price today yeah it feels a little strange it doesn't look strange it looks good I think it looks very good thanks um I have a few topics today I'm I'm excited I'm gonna start with talking tits because I'm I don't know if I've already talked about this on the podcast it feels like something i would have brought up and this is a stat that i have read previously so stop me if i've already said this okay people are having less sex than ever i you haven't said that but i can i feel like i can societally sense that yeah it feels like um i keep seeing a meme and it's like this is how it feels to have sex in 2025 and it's like uh I think it's an art

installation and it's like the kids pointing and laughing and then the other like kid is like their statues yeah yeah yeah kids like crying that's really funny it's true it's just it's interesting because this is like obviously self-reported so it could also be a function of people not having less sex but just talking about it less or feeling less open to talk about it in general it feels so much more stigmatized yeah what the fuck and then how do you feel do you feel like you're having less sex or talking about it less i feel like i'm talking about it less yeah but you and i are in relationships so it's like it feels like if we were both still dating we would still be talking about sex a lot that's true you know that's true and we've we've

talked about that a few times like it's even like friends i feel like i'm not hearing i feel like i hear less about sex and i'm hearing more about like um people getting pregnant and so that that insinuates they're having sex yeah where there's smoke there's fire they're all pregnant or they're all getting engaged yeah i feel like that's more of what i'm hearing about lately i do feel like when people are in serious relationships though which a lot like i think the majority of my friends are they people just talk about sex less because it's like more there's there's not as much fun shit to report yeah and there's something yeah that's so true yeah there's more interesting shit to report when it's like early on or like a new partner or you're like yeah you're like

having sex with multiple people like it's just that's when you talk about it you're gathering information yeah and then there's just kind of less to report that's so true but it's i don't know cut right in your sex stories because we need proof people are having sex yeah are y'all fucking Gatsby Gatsby said cut the cameras dead ass Gatsby walked right up to the camera and now he's rubbing on it come here so the stats are 37% of adults aged 18 to 64 are reporting having sex in 2024 and that's down from 55% in 1990 wow no one's fucking people don't be fucking like they used to i think in general haven't those statistics in general gone down like over time not just yeah oh yeah no i think yeah i don't think it's been a steep drop off i wonder how much of it

has to do with covid yeah people just interact differently now and it feels like everyone would rather perform the like they'd rather perform for each other the idea that they're having sex and not necessarily that like that they actually are having sex does that make sense yeah that's so high school of everyone yeah i feel like everyone was talking about having like how much sex they had was that in your high school too no because most of my high school was mormons if people were having sex it was like a big deal i used to be so fucking jealous of girls because i i didn't lose my virginity until after high school and i was so fucking jealous i think that's chic yeah so chic to like lose your virginity after high school thank you so much i gave my

first bj to i thought i was not gonna have sex until college oh and then ed sex life had other plans senior year oh yeah see i thought that you were like the coolest bitch ever i had no idea what i was doing having sex was not fun until i was like 22 yeah that's so real and it was just with one person well i was only having sex with one person basically until the pandemic you know i mean like i was i was being safe when everybody was being safe okay don't come for me but like when things started opening up again that's when i like started like fucking you know what i mean i was like oh this could be fun like this you know i could have a good time yeah oh this is enjoyable yeah anyway i don't think yeah i don't think most people are like

i think young women are socialized to not believe that sex is also supposed to be fun for them yeah um so it's just kind of like oh i'll uh i'll do it for you it's not my favorite but i'll do it for you yeah yeah yeah yeah totally and then i don't know what the fuck is going on in young men's head right now no me neither i've never known no never known it's been peaceful maybe it's just a monkey with symbols yeah that would that would honestly answer a lot of questions that i have if that was all that was going on frozen pizza yeah creatine flags as decorations yeah flags as curtains flags as curtains saturdays are for the boys socks with holes in them one pillow crusty sheets blue sheets like navy blue sheets what and they're always crusty they're why

because their mom always washed their sheets that's so true nasty anyways i'm glad i'm not living in that same period of my life anymore same um speaking of young men i'm gonna pivot to my next topic it's not about it's not about young men but it's about young people there were some gen z dating terms that came up on my search for topics this week oh interesting that i have never heard of the first one very easy to figure out the last two chopped no the last two i love chopped chopped and one of my co-workers wrote so we do like um it's called kudo boards um for like birthdays and work anniversaries he wrote on my kudo board like you're probably doing something way cooler than i even know about and then it said like me chopped unk or something like that

so funny and i was like i like that people think that i am just like very involved in the cultural zeitgeist yeah that's such that's such high praise um but i did delete tiktok this week which is huge for me i've been announcing it i had a bit of a moment about it when you told me it just it just i don't know it has i i think if i weren't listening to such a long audiobook it would be hitting me harder so it feels like a good transition good where I'm like I get annoyed when Mr. Liz starts talking to me when I'm clearly listening to my audiobook I'm like can we be done with this conversation so I can go back to my audio so funny you know he's like being so sweet I don't know does does Mr. Liz do this because Frank does this where it's like he'll be quiet

up until I need to be focusing on something yes what is that I don't know or like when I'm I'm like ready to yap he's like looking at his phone or something yeah and i'm like okay well you're obviously preoccupied myself then i'll wait until you want to talk and then when he's ready to hear me yap i'm like no you lost your opportunity because now i'm i'm in audiobook world yeah you know you should have you should have appreciated what you had when you had it does it count as reading if it's an audiobook i know we've had this discussion i think i used to make fun of my ex for saying he read a book when he just listened to it on audiobook but i would like to rescind that you're still you're still taking in the same information

yeah just in a different format so here are the gen z terms i'm going to give you the first one first obviously because it's easy to figure out there are two afterward that i had to look up okay because i had no clue what do you think benching is benching these are all dating terms uh when you can oh you put someone on the bench that you're dating yep okay keeping someone i'm benching him that's hilarious keeping somebody on the sidelines as a backup option yeah i love that i thank god i'm playing um fantasy football oh my god i don't know i've lost the last six weeks i've lost the last handful of weeks this is the first week i've won in like three weeks so jealous at least i was winning last time i checked maybe i should check again

frank is like you have to do some transactions you have to make some trades i'm like no i don't i'm too i don't know how to do that i'm too pretty for that i did i did try to get him to do it for me it's true he could do mine he did he wouldn't even do mine if he does yours i'd be pissed i don't know what the hell is going on i'm like well it is what it is i do that i do the quick lineup me too me too i'm like the the boss they know better than me right i don't know what the fuck i'm doing okay what do you think submarining is submarining okay give me a second to noodle on this it's a pretty word submarining i'm gonna name my first daughter submarining um is that when you have to breathe out of your nose when you're doing stuff

downtown oh that would i guess maybe that would be more like snorkeling yeah that also makes it easier to not gag my gag reflex is fucking insane in a bad way not like gag reflex game go crazy i i don't it's i have a very strong gag reflex i don't like i don't like when it's so intense i'm gagging it doesn't take much that my ent tried looking in my throat and i gagged to my own head too i'm like oh now i'm gagging oh it's i can't stop yeah and apparently because i was trying to look up how to make it so your gag reflex isn't so strong because like i can't get strep tests like i can't do anything i'm not that bad oh my god it's he literally my ent he he tried to push down on my tongue with like a tongue depressor and i was like i like could i

couldn't do it he was like oh you're protective like is that what it's i'm doing i'm trying i guess it's like a survival thing yeah it's like trying to keep anyway but you can like trick your brain into not being not having a gag reflex that's a lot of work i know i'm just gonna keep the gag reflex wait okay submarining yeah submarining submarines go underwater that's so true queen um is it when a bunch of billionaires blow up no it's a dating term i know uh submarine actually there's nothing more romantic than that tell me tell me what it is it's reappearing after ghosting oh you like come up from under the water okay hmm i would have never have guessed that yeah that's that's a niche reference it do be yeah but you know these gen

z they are they're smart you know they got they got their references they do love you know i guess i guess i was thinking sex terms not necessarily dating terms oh okay okay okay the last one is biobaiting biobaiting biobaiting okay bio like life she was gonna think like the latin root um biobaiting when you fuck i don't know it's do you want to keep thinking do you want me to tell you no i want you to tell me overselling yourself in a dating app bio oh did you think like masturbating no these are all so much more that they seem so obvious i got the first one yeah you did bio baiting that makes so much sense i literally was thinking like biology bio biology

yeah yeah yeah yeah i know trees well that's what it sounds like if that's what it sounds like because it's also like biohacking but that makes so much sense you oh here's my fun bio but like then you're really boring in real life yeah it's kind of like personality catfish i was scrolling through so before i dated deleted tiktok um there was one that was like uh it had like i think it had like horror music and it was like what people see on or like what i see on hinge or something and it was screenshots of like just the the worst fucking like replies to to things yeah and the comments were even worse and i was like i really feel like i got the last plane out of Vietnam yeah because absolutely this was not I mean sure I came across some dumb

bios for sure or like responses on hinge but not nearly as bad as what the girls are dealing with oh yeah I really I feel like I stopped doing that as my brand like around the time that it started to get even worse it felt like I was seeing the same shit for so long and then I stopped doing it and now the shit that like will pop up like videos on TikTok I'm just like Jesus what the fuck happened oh my god how did it get worse I I think it's a combination of things I think that COVID really amplified people's like not just screen addiction but addiction to like instant gratification like do you know anything about like sports betting and like how rampant it is sports betting is ruining people's lives well i have seen a lot of like lawsuits happening

right now against like it it's horrible yeah there i listened to um i listened to a podcast that like told a few stories about like people who have like gotten in over their heads with sports betting apps and sports betting in general and like it's just um it it like recently became legal um I don't know what all of the rules are it's not legal in Washington yet I think it's like legal via apps though because you're betting within the app yeah um and you can bet on anything now so I think all of the betting has really like I think it's fucked with a lot of men I think it's ruined a lot of their lives um so that is addictive like gambling addiction is a thing yeah um so i think like the gambling addiction combined with like

porn addiction like there's just so many different things to be addicted to there's a south park episode the most recent one called conflict of interest that's about those apps and how you can bet on literally anything now and i didn't realize it was like such a fucking problem yeah like in terms i knew that like you could bet on anything in sports like you can bet on like what color the Gatorade is that's gonna be I wouldn't I would have no idea about this if Mr. Liz didn't tell me like his friends know about it yeah about it but his friends from back home because it's yeah because you can't do it in Washington I mean thank god I know I mean how that'll probably change just knowing how everything is but uh did you read I sent you an article about gooners

I didn't read it no I ended up so good I was like I feel like there's something that I'm forgetting about that i wanted to discuss well i want to read it i've been meaning to read it i just forgot talk about it next that's what i think yeah okay that's what i was about to say yeah tune in next week for us to discuss gooners yeah so this is gooning this is a men's appreciation episode and we're taking a swift fucking detour next week i i don't i don't know if it'll necessarily be i don't think it'll be as man-eating as you think it's going to be okay the article is crazy i can't remember where i it's not the verge um every time you say the verge i think of somebody like calling somebody a verge like you fucking verge yeah you fucking bird let's get that insult trending

um but if folks want to read the article before it is an article by harpers so one of my topics dovetails nicely into something that I thought about on my way here so I'm going to bring up the thing that I thought of on my way here which is what are some non-sexual things that you find super sexual well do you have an example so yes the reason that I thought of this was there was a dude on a bike when i was coming here who had really skinny ankles and i was like that shit used to get me so fucking skinny and hard that's amazing not anymore you know which is good because you know frank's got some fucking tree trunks on him but like that man he has quads he really does that's for sure he yeah he's some strong legs kind of caked oh yeah oh yeah

yeah he's got a wagon on him um your kids are gonna have the biggest ass they are the biggest asses and the biggest they're gonna be called big dumper oh yeah future big dumpers oh my god wow what an honor when you're pregnant can you wear a shirt that says future big dumper i absolutely will or maybe we'll get a get a little baby a little baby onesie yeah yeah it says future big I like that our kids are gonna have huge heads because we both were in the 99th percentile of head sizes as babies so I'm gonna be like it's gonna be awful big head big butt bigger heart that's that's the onesie right there that's what it's gonna say oh my god no we'll sell it as merch oh my god baby merch nobody will understand except for except for the listeners yeah except

for the listeners and that's all that we really need honestly um well so while you were talking i did think of something like a non-sexual thing that i think is really hot um backing into a car space or backing into a parking spot okay uh anytime mr liz does it i i realize i make an announcement i was like oh he's backing in ladies and gentlemen yeah hell yeah it is there is something about that that's like okay it's big dick energy yeah confidently back into a spot yeah um i don't know it's hot fuck yeah there's something i i really like about that there is like behavioral things that are really sexy and that's one of them there was another what i just thought of when you were just talking now i think savvy like being savvy is very sexual to me you know

just like taking charge and knowing the answers to things that's so sexy trying to think of what else i think is like what's like a physical ass like because i feel like a lot of women will say like forearms like strong forearms the um this was discussed on ride the podcast um i love ride so much but benny and marybeth were talking about uh the the vein in in men's arms oh yeah like the vein that sticks out and then um you just reminded me i think it was when i when we came home after my surprise party um i don't know i was definitely inebriated in some capacity i was either crossfaded or high or drunk but uh mr liz was like changing or something and like he's gotten kind of ripped lately so but his arm vein was sticking out and i was like oh there it is arm

vein yeah i've heard so much about you i was loudly thirsty like you look so good look at that arm vein hell yeah yeah i do love a popping vein is the arm vein is really sexy yeah and when it goes across the bicep uh-huh i i feel like also hands i don't know yeah i hands had a moment on tiktok like in 2020 oh yeah veiny hands yeah veiny hands i don't know just like a a big calloused beigny hand yeah yeah um i've always been an arm girl though me too big arm girly um i'm trying to think of if there's anything else that i'm like like a physical attribute yeah i'm trying to think too like i feel like kind of like sleepy eyes oh yeah they got some some eye bags oh you like eye bags a little bit okay yeah i like a beard like oh what were you up late doing yeah

writing a book yeah oh painting something oh my goodness writing poetry about me I would love to be a muse I want to be a stay-at-home muse my first boyfriend wrote a song about me he played guitar he was in a band oh yeah I was 16 it was like peak life amazing what was it called I don't remember are there any banger lines in there you know you would think with how excited I was I would remember any of it but I do remember him I mean it's hard to remember things when you're that's true but like it well i remember like him playing it for me on my bedroom floor with my guitar and he had i should show you pictures of him he had like the long swoopy hair that was like oh hell yeah and he was mormon he was a bad mormon he cheated on me

16 year old me that was the start of like a long line of being cheated on um it's your fault yeah no one's ever written a song about me rip oh my god i just recently found actually I probably already told you this but um this guy that I used to study with in college like fell in love with me and told me when I had broken up with my ex like the first time in college and like gave me this picture of me that he drew and it's a very detailed picture and I just found it is it like is it good yeah I mean he's he's still an artist like he's like he's very talented in college like I wouldn't call him an artist you know what I mean but it was good for a college boy in my head I'm just thinking about like the Napoleon Dynamite

yeah I drew a picture of you it it was I'm trying to think what else was in there because he he wrote me he wrote me a handwritten note it's also in there um and there was like some other papers in there but I don't remember kept that oh yeah I can't get rid of that yeah no way do you still have that painting from that one person no yeah Amelia got a painting wasn't there a poem on that too no it just said on the back what the what like what the inspiration was for the painting should i talk about it i doubt he still listens to the podcast honestly i i would love to hear super nice guy um and at the moment it was a little overwhelming because i can't remember what he wrote on it so he painted me a heart like an anatomical heart and it was half colored in

red and on the back he wrote you fill my heart up but it was half empty so like me in my state of mind then i was like but it's half empty you know i was like i don't think i filled up your heart at all yeah but um he like had packaged it in this envelope that his like grandma had gotten from his grandpa during the war oh wow and i was like let's not give that to me yeah but i kept it he wanted me to i don't know what happened to it i think my parents when they moved they got rid of it because i don't have it i have no idea where it is and they didn't fly it to florida my mom gave her class ring to like her ex-boyfriend oh my god yeah that's what you would do you would exchange class rings holy shit i wonder if she is his it kind of feels like it's one of

the it's like a letterman jacket it's like the thing that you get in high school yeah what the fuck was i gonna get a letterman jacket for theater some people did have those what yeah oh i would have eaten that shit up oh my god the only reason i played sports was for the trophies what i would have loved a letterman jacket for theater oh my god you can get the letterman's jacket and then you have to buy your own patches for it see they didn't give us the option unless you were in sports well oh which is i mean there i it is a little cringe to buy a letterman's jacket and put a theater badge on it i don't care but the be the cringe you want to see in the world happy mask and the sad mask yeah and i would have done it so proudly and then i would never wear it

ever again but i would say i have a letterman jacket and it would have been worth it for the price and the cringe moving along so dovetailing on those oh yeah non-sexual things that you find sexual um i read about a trend called okay before before i do that this morning i woke up and frank had left a note for me on the fridge that said there's nobody i would rather experience an atmospheric river with than you because i was telling him all about the atmospheric river and why it was so windy and it was just like the sweetest thing like it was like so it was so little and like he leaves notes on the fridge for me like semi often you know but like I was just like taking the time out of your morning to like open a pen and write a note you know it's like

little shit like that that goes such a long way with me and so when I read about this trend I was like this is so topically relevant it's called micromancing and it's doing like little displays of romance like that and like the trend right now is that people are expecting like you know there are still people that love like the big grand gestures but like in mass people are starting to want small gestures from their significant others rather than like big that makes so much sense moments and there's a word for it micromancing i like that yeah little micromance i feel like mr liz does a lot of stuff like that um like he got me it's called a love box he found it at goodwill and i probably have talked about this before but he can send messages to it

through his phone i don't know he found it at goodwill yeah it didn't have a lid um so he like ordered a new lid for it because he was like what is this and then he looked it up that's so cute oh i bet liz would love that um and he was correct but uh when he sends a message the heart on the front spins around um and then i open it up i take a picture of every single one too because i think it's so sweet that's so sweet and he always does the same um cadence it'll be like roses are red violets are blue something something i love that whatever it is and there's like an app for it is that that's yeah he has to send it through the app but it is just like a small little thing that like makes me feel special yeah loved yeah um like when he is out of town for a while he'll

send one every day i love that super sweet it's like that it's this is the thing like i feel like boys i don't want to say men like boys in their 20s are like women are like so fucking impossible to make happy like you guys expect so much and it's like just like send me a note yeah tell me that you're thinking of me yeah put a little sticky note in my bag yeah oh my god i do that for mr liz sometimes i'll write like a little sticky note and hide it in his bag yeah i love that um yeah i i agree with that yeah lots of little i think little things to show that you like one are paying attention and two that you care like go a really long way it doesn't always need to be some big grand gesture or like going on dates or a nice day just like showing i think

just remembering things about other people too yeah i there's something that feels so special about 100 like oh you remembered i said that yeah i've probably talked about this on the podcast there was one day that frank like used both of my middle names and i was like you know my middle names and i was like so touched and he was like amelia like the bar has got to be higher like i signed a lease with you of course i know your middle name yeah you know but i was like no you would you would think that that would be something that you could just expect from people but like i don't know it's it's such like a it feels like an act of service when people remember like details about you yeah you know yeah i think also like you have so many things to remember yeah in general

that it's like sweet when someone remembers something about you totally yeah i was thinking about this as we were talking sometimes it would be fun to go back to early dating stages yeah of course something that is so chaotic about it you know yeah when i have a crush it is a mental illness yeah like i can't sleep i am very excited like that i hate it and i love it oh yeah i kind of miss it totally kind of miss having a little not a little crush i don't know i had a giant crush on mr liz yeah you did it was embarrassing and it's all documented i know that's wild on this podcast i remember the first time you or maybe the second time you talked about him he's the first person i've had that big of a crush on you know what i mean yeah i love that i told him

that too i love the other day when we were talking about it i i've had such like a different experience with frank like i had a crush on frank but it was all like i don't think that i ever really hit like a chaotic moment in our dating where i was just like feeling out of control like there was one moment where like i was going on trips back to back and i was like you're not gonna like me when I come back and that was the first time I cried in front of him um I think that you feel like that would happen to you oh yeah really yeah you'd go on a trip and like a guy would be like I'm not interested anymore oh it would just like it would just kind of like fizzle out or like he would start like he'd be dating somebody else at the same time and then

they would spend extra time together while I was gone and then like you know damn yeah yeah so I was like oh I mean like this is not gonna last because like I'm about to leave I wonder if that's happened to me before i don't know it was it was so bad that i like associated florida specifically because it was i was usually like visiting my parents i associated florida with like being dumped damn but also my ex cheated on me for the first time when i was in florida so like i already had all these like negative emotions yeah with florida we need to sage the whole state yeah i mean for multiple reasons yeah yeah what if we just like you know that bugs bunny video of him sawing florida off we just need to do that i think so too he was onto something damn

bugs bunny was fucking on his shit dog bugs bunny dude he was he was he was he was yeah i was like i don't know where to go from there he was on his shit dog so okay continue what you were saying oh i just like never felt like i just haven't ever our whole relationship has been so like yeah this is the this is it you know what i mean yeah that like we i don't think either of us i mean he will probably actually he was feeling a little bit chaotic toward the beginning of our relationship but i just always felt so like yeah this makes sense did do you think he felt chaotic because he felt like he was competing yeah i think he was worried that he was going to like me and i and then he was never going to see me again like on our first date he was like oh well this is the

last time i'm going to see her you know like this was cool yeah so he i think he he had some moments of chaos but not me i was just like this is fucking dope this is such a normal dude that i like yeah he was like a breath of fresh air yeah this is bizarre cool gust of wind on a hot day but i was thinking about that it's like i never had that like because that feeling of having a crush on someone is like it really is such like a horrible and amazing feeling at the same time i like this person so much yeah i mean it makes sense that you felt that way because you weren't like looking for a relationship if I also hadn't really been excited like that about someone in a long time yeah so it was just very overwhelming and normally maybe this is gonna sound

I don't know it's okay if this sounds cunty but um like normally in dating situations I was the one in control of everything yeah and I didn't really feel in control yeah with Mr. Liz yeah that's so true and that was the first time I'd heard you talk like you were feeling out of control I mean except for like Twitter bae oh god well I think that was like a warm-up yeah it was like a preparation for what was about to come yeah totally yeah he was a stepping stone which and when i i also think like a lot of that too is like me making it something else in my head because when you're not like when you're just talking to someone like over message yeah like you can paint it you don't really know who they are yeah you know you can make them whatever you

want totally so i think that was part of the infatuation um and there's not really any there's not a lot of risk like involved when you're just kind of like talking to someone over message yeah like he lived on the other side of the country yeah totally and it was like yeah like it was during the pandemic so like you were already like kind of like needing that connection I was doing a lot of mushrooms too yeah and and you just like you just said you like you fill in details about people when you don't have any to go off of and like it was exciting at the time it was it was that was so funny but that was another time that it felt like you weren't i feel like i was too old to be doing that whatever i feel like everyone regressed a little bit during

the pandemic yeah that's true i okay yeah i would co-sign that yeah i think we just i mean look how fucking dumb we are now yeah we're fucking idiots ever everyone's a fucking idiot yeah to be clear especially me no of all people no there's a lot of people who are way stupider that's so true i'm so fucking smart at any time have you seen the um everyone is 12 now no really yeah okay uh i'm surprised you haven't come across this yet the a guy on twitter was like i'm working on a theory a unified theory called everyone is 12 now he said working on a new unified theory of american reality i'm calling everyone is 12 now and then the follow-up tweet is i'm strong and i want to have like 50 kids and a farm of course you do you're 12 i don't want to eat vegetables i think

steak and french fries is the only meal hell yeah homie you're 12 maybe if there's crime we should just send the army bless your heart my 12 year old buddy that's so fucking real i think steak and french fries is the only meal that's so fucking funny but yeah anytime there's just like some things that you see online that you're like are you must be 12 yeah everyone is 12 now it's so true i think i've used that insult on people that have like tweeted me hate i'm like are you 12 they are they i think they must all be every day but and i did i think i sent you another screenshot of a study that had reported that um over 70 of twitter accounts are bots yeah which was an increase from before elon musk bought twitter and one of the reasons he tried to back

out of the deal was because that at that point 30 of users were bots wow great way to spend your billions of dollars you fucking idiot you know i don't you know okay here's the thing i feel like i feel as though josh johnson has a bit about this in his most recent stand-up that i think that we assume just like maybe on a subconscious level that if you have a billion dollars you must be smart and that's just not true no no it's it's almost I feel like it's almost never true like typically when someone is that wealthy it's because they were born into already being wealthy yeah maybe not billionaire wealthy but they already had a lot of advantages um predetermined for them with having family money and then um from there most of the time it's because they

found a new way to exploit people oh yeah like that's why Jeff Bezos is a billionaire he found a new way to exploit people yeah and um there I don't know if you know this um I've like had talked to a few people who worked at amazon and hr and um some of them had said like yeah other workplaces don't want to hire people who are leaving amazon because they bring like such a toxic energy oh shit yeah they're like you need to work somewhere else before you can come here because the environment at amazon is so like awful and competitive oh my god do you think that's like on purpose on amazon's word yeah you'll never work anywhere again well amazon like they created an environment of like high tension and competition among employees to make

them work so hard yeah i haven't i know another person who works in like who works at amazon i won't say what department but like there is a specific role where like the last like two people who had it have died so what the fuck i know holy shit yeah i don't think um for the same reasons but like still the fact that that the stats are not looking good for that role there's i don't know there's just it's never gonna be worth it yeah there is um that this is like kind of related and also not at all but um that's salon chain gene juarez have you heard of gene juarez i think it's a salon chain just in washington but i could be wrong about that but there's like a bunch of Jean Juarez locations and every person that works there has a fake name and apparently they do that

so that you can't take your clients with you if you leave that's fucked because they have a hard time finding you whoa isn't that fucked up yeah yeah that's crazy okay every time I've talked to like a different stylist like I don't know I've been to a few different stylists it sounds like the people who own these salons are fucking crazy yeah and like half the time they've never even been like stylists themselves yeah i'm like damn yeah there was a girl on this season of love is blind us who was a salon owner and she was not fucking off her skis yeah maybe i should be a salon owner the other thing that i wanted to talk about um we should wait until next week because i feel like it could actually be a whole other hour um which is the performative male epidemic that's happening

and how the discourse online has shifted about it i would love to to discuss and hear your takes on that let's do that because i feel like also like the performative male has changed yeah since we've been in our 20s totally yeah like a performative man in our time in our day of date when we were still dating they just had to wear like nail polish and like a pearl necklace yeah but now it's so much more egregious yeah it's egregious but also it feels like a way for other men to like dog on men that have like interests and hobbies true you know damn it's like oh you man world because oh you you knit you do that for the bitches yeah you paint performative male it's like not you know what i mean oh they think everything is a performance for women yeah

i think that requires some reflection little buddy but also let's just go to the extreme and say that that is true is that so bad yeah is that terrible for us birds do it yeah you know perform performing for women well the alternative is what performing for men yeah also why can't you just have interest right that's the thing it's like the definition has shifted so much well i i also think that that kind of uh interpretation has always been turned on women like oh you're just doing that so men will like you yeah oh yeah for sure that's such a good or whatever yeah it's like uh actually i don't exist for consumption yeah like right like there's a whole thing about like like and that's why i have micro bangs now

men thinking don't fucking look at me that's so funny micro bangs are unapproachable that's so true they're they're not that micro no they're not they're more like baby bangs yeah baby bangs yeah but they are there is something um that is not very friendly towards men yeah about bangs i just the the whole conversation that's happening for a while about like women wear makeup for men was so fucking funny because it's like they can't fucking tell the difference no they can't tell the difference and they also aren't appreciating how much effort i've put into a cat eye yeah you don't know how hard that is no and i've been doing it for so long and sometimes i still fuck it up okay see i don't even try because it always ruins my day that's my day yeah that's how i feel when i

try on shorts oh yeah that's so real i'm like uh i want a good pair of shorts that aren't too short i don't know if you feel this way but the older i get the less i want people like the less i want to show off my body not in like a not in a way where i feel self-conscious yeah and not in a way where I think like my body looks bad it doesn't I think I actually will check myself out in the mirror hell yeah I'm like you know what great tits hell yeah um hell yeah like I like what I see but there's just something now where I'm like that I don't know I don't want to wear short shorts yeah I want to be comfortable yeah um and I just also don't necessarily want to show off my body as much i'm just like yeah no i don't want you to look at me or approach me

yeah i've also noticed that like i mean this might also be a function of being in a relationship but like i don't take selfies anymore no me either i used to take so many i used to have like full photo shoots of like when i was feeling hot now i'm just like if i have to like find like a selfie to like submit for something i have to go back so far yeah i have like no pictures of myself unless i'm like at something even then like i was thinking about my surprise party i didn't take any pictures yeah me neither i was like oh i probably should have taken a picture of everyone here that would have been cute i didn't even didn't even cross my mind yeah well there is something um so i'm subscribed to a lot of like social media newsletters and stuff like just to

read what other people in my like industry are saying or observing um and one of the things was how people like are just on instagram aren't posting on their timeline at all like almost never people do people post yeah actual photos yeah and it's so much harder to find like your friends posting even if you go to the friends tab like you can go to like people i'm following tab and then you can also go to your starred section but they make it so much harder to navigate to that yeah and community used to be the essence of social media platforms and all of them have lost it to advertising to algorithms like to keeping people in the app so they could sell more ads that's literally like what happens to every single social media app and um like people are still

taking the pictures and documenting these things but they're not sharing them anywhere yeah and it's because like it all of these platforms have just been absolutely gutted yeah bastardized by advertisements like pictures have just like turned they've gone back to what they used to be yeah it's just like the way we communicate right now like yeah it's now like sharing memes with each other yeah um there's also like a discussion to be had about like um people are now kind of more flocking towards private spaces to have conversations like and create community so more like discord or reddit where people are not like the whole structure is around your specific community and not like openly being like advertised to and shit like that yeah um and i think we're

gonna see a lot more of that i think we're gonna see more and more of that as um the creation of like ai content starts poisoning these other platforms which i kind of think they fucking deserve it like i think facebook is gonna be the first to go oh yeah i'm surprised it kind of hasn't oh also if you guys are worried about your data you should delete the facebook app from your phone and especially the messenger app oh yeah they're like the most egregious with like data collection that's where i make so much of my money facebook yeah oh interesting facebook they stopped paying us on instagram now i have to cross post on facebook yeah and that's to get people to post on facebook they're trying to like revive facebook but like they pay out the ass i think facebook is

only good for um facebook marketplace and like the buy nothing group yeah but even then i haven't checked the either of those in a long time damn you sound so free i hate facebook facebook sucks it is a disaster oh and then when i was monitoring our facebook account for my job um someone sent a bunch of like dick pictures and videos oh and everyone can see my desk and my computer i'm like i don't want to be scrolling and there's a penis why are they sending that to a company just because i don't know and then you can't block them yeah so whatever i just marked it as spam that's crazy yeah i had to put it in a separate window and like make it really small because i was like i don't want someone to walk by my desk and see a video of someone jacking off

yeah like what's what's liz doing over at her i don't know like i'll check on twitter like the trending things to see if anything crazy is happening um and then sometimes when you click like one of the trending like hashtags or topics to see what it's about like some sex worker will be posting i don't know like taco tuesday i was like oh nope gonna close that yeah and it's on all of them like yeah yeah they'll piggyback on what's trending jesus christ well all that to say um i think a lot of platforms are going to make that transition or i think a lot of uh people are going to be leaving these platforms and um moving to spaces like substack and just where they're having more of a curated experience like substack discord i'm part of a few discord groups we have

a discord we do that's a great we have a discord we should there's a lot of people on our discord yeah not a lot of conversation no we should revive it let's do that it makes me so fucking happy that that exists i think you can post polls it'd be fun to post polls there yeah yeah and then we'll go on it and you can talk to us yeah then that's cool because we don't hear enough of us yapping about shit huh any reason to distract me from doing my work is one i will welcome absolutely and now that i don't have tiktok i'm gonna have so much free time that's so yeah that's so true what am i gonna do with all my free time just talk on discord to the angels you heard it here first do you want to sing us out liz yeah

we love you You are children. Thank you.