The Hoely Hour - THE BROELY HOUR

Episode Date: September 26, 2025

It finally happened: we had the boyfriends co-host with us. They answer questions about the male loneliness epidemic, advice for couples moving in together, and what they'd bring to a deserted island. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

finger in the butt oh but it wasn't gay no no it's brotherhood brotherly fingering it's not gay if it's a surprise we're live we're live we're recording hit it all right do we have to use code names what's uh you're mr liz uh-huh and you're frank yeah okay wait frank like the hot sauce yeah how many times have you been on the podcast uh two or three are you excited frank yeah you hyped up mr liz super hyped hell yeah sick take it away you know i've had stuck in my head all day is jojo siwa her saying dream guest on my podcast dream guest on my podcast that was good everyone do their best jojo siwa impression i only know how to do the dance and i don't know how to do the dance

i only know how to try to move that way i don't know what she sounds like dream i don't know if my podcast she's she's insufferable apparently also a trump supporter really yeah not surprised yeah she's going through a fifth of your life crisis yeah whatever that is someone twice her age oh she is and a man during pride month too i didn't realize that he was twice her age i don't think he's actually twice her age is she lesbian or something he's 30 now she's 30 something yeah she identifies as queer now but okay it just so happened um coincided with when she became a trump supporter publicly so people are complicated yeah like caitlyn jenner yeah you know yeah it's an interesting uh case yeah it is expand on that no maybe we shouldn't manslaughter yeah manslaughter

she killed someone yeah is it manslaughter because the person she killed was a man or is it woman slaughter because she's a woman damn you know that that's there's sexism embedded into the penal code yeah into the penis code i knew someone was going to take the bait it was me put that shit out there oh so this is the first first time we've had both boyfriends it's the first broly hour there's a lot of a lot of heat in this room a lot of breath we're gonna start lifting weights and grunting later hell yeah i'm already feeling my testosterone raising yeah right now wait do you grunt when you lift no i sent off the the hunk alarm i just i just cuss a lot i'm like

fuck this fuck this like after the set i'm just like very like beside myself it's not like a cool looking thing i'm like pissed off i would have such a crush on you if you were at my gym i promise you you wouldn't it's the gym that i used to go to uh right around here that went out of business had this like crew of high schoolers that were just so juiced up and one of them between sets squatting would bang his head on the squat rack to like get himself hyped up it was so alarming it was the this mix of just like broccoli headed teenagers in uh like coke uh what are they called just like cookie monster uh pajama pants just on roids and then um you know like the elderly crowd and then just 30 something is just being like i just want to get in and get out i i think they're

a valuable part of the ecosystem of gyms juiced up high schoolers it's so funny because it's like kevin garnett the basketball player used to bang his head against the basket before the game started and we had to all act like it was this cool thing it's like he's a grown-ass man yeah see high schoolers do it i'm like hell yeah go go crazy be a little ignorant yeah hell yeah with the broccoli hair i can't do what age what age is it no longer okay to be ignorant like that 21 no honestly i think pretty pretty much any age yeah yeah i'm capping it at 26 well i think that this leads into a good question that we got from uh one of the listeners um someone wanted to know if they said did they have a right wing phase and how did they get out of it

never i feel confident that yeah my mom would throw shoes at me if i even like joked about it Did you still have, like, a dumb guy phase? What do you mean by dumb guy? And am I out of it? Like, treating girls, like, not the best. Oh. Being a little objectifying. Just, like, a typical manosphere phase that I feel like teenage boys tend to have.

Like, a nice, or I would say a nice guy phase is also adjacent to that. Girls don't want to date nice guys. No. which is like i'm not just pandering but like truly like it's just a miracle like it i had a girlfriend in high school who was super cool so i never had that problem and then literally i'm my mom would beat my ass if i hell yeah talk like that i always had a pretty good like co-ed group of friends so it was never never really got like polarized one way or the other hell yeah we picked some good ones it happens though sorry to this listener if you're dating someone who is in a

right wing phase i just give up i think you see a lot more with like younger guys these days it wasn't much of a thing in our generation it feels it was like frowned upon to act like that the manosphere yeah oh yeah yeah like like i think it also depends on where you like live you're right because i went to college in arizona and there was all kinds of frat boys who there's definitely a distinct group in my college that were like that i wouldn't say that they were like egregious i would say at most they didn't really care about politics at all or anything saturdays are for the boys yeah they did have that that was a flag man saturdays are for the boys it's insane how many people own that flag this leads into a good question that i have um

has the holy hour made you better partners uh interesting question well mr liz doesn't listen but to know that there's an audience of people that do frank frank listens religiously okay oh i mean like i i'll miss a couple weeks and then i'll go on a long saturday drive and i'll try my best to catch up that's so sweet but i think the way you frame the question it's like is it make you a better partner in a threatening way yeah i thought i interpreted it as does it make you a better partner because we are so wise um i guess i've never thought of it that way mr liz doesn't think i'm wise that's i've never said that you didn't need to your laugh said it all um yeah i don't know which is probably a second question in a row i'm not really like

giving juice to but i suppose i suppose it's like more of like did it make you a better partner because off the bat you feel like oh i have to behave right or they're going to talk about it on this podcast i know that a lot of dudes that i was dating viewed it that way and that always annoyed me because i'm like no you have to actually be interesting yeah and so few of them were i don't even think about it and that's not to like dismiss it i just it's like it's like it's like a thing you do yeah i'm not like like it's it's even with like the social media stuff you do it's like sometimes i don't fathom that it's that many people because i just i'm like oh it's just a thing you do but i try not to think about it totally i only think about it if it if something

happens where i think like oh this would be a good story to tell liz oh hell yeah it would go well podcast any juicy tea hell yeah yeah uh we also got a question for my brother um he said what's the gayest fart they ever smelled oh that's a that's a deep that's a yeah what's the gayest you go first i gotta think about this so i i was given this question earlier so i was able to have some time to ruminate on it fuck dude they're sandbagging me um it was at jujitsu which is already pretty gay so we're off to a good start there and i do make a lot of probably like not woke gay jokes about i mean so does so does the whole sport so okay they did it first yeah you're just part of the gang i mean a bunch of sweaty dudes

trying to kiss each other yeah or not kissing the fuck i don't know that's what you just don't kiss me we should go watch anyway this is where you smell yeah was it your own no thankfully okay um um this this dude was essentially like uh sitting on my face and farted i'll have what he said did you get pink eye no but i was like oh god that was that's disgusting what did it make sound or did you just feel the air you know i didn't it just made sound i didn't you know i didn't smell it actually so maybe this doesn't answer the question but did you hold your breath yeah and i uh like just tapped and was like okay you just i mean he knew what he knew what happened he knew what happened he was very apologetic secret weapon yeah that's a good

strategy actually it's like these nba players that would be like there's a few of them that are like yeah i would get as stinky as i could before the games so that like people wouldn't want to guard me that's so smart that's from like that's kind of crazy but i mean yeah i think for me the gym i go to is very like proudly like open like very openly like this is a queer gym it's it's the thing and um so we have a lot of of of gay lesbian queer people at our gym and uh there was one guy in particular who was like you know very a gay man and um he was doing a man at the gay gym he was doing like pull downs across from where i was doing something else and he was ripping the hardest ass to where like i like i was like

gagging each rep i couldn't believe it i was looking around at everyone i'm like this you guys is everyone like it can't just be me that smells this but it was and he knew what he was doing because i was i was very much making a fuss about it so that's literally the gayest fart i've good answer yeah you both answered because i was going to ask well what made the fart gay yeah but i feel like you both answered that very astutely yeah could have given me advice but it was farting all over me it's probably all the protein it's probably true uh what are your thoughts on the male loneliness epidemic oh we're getting into it now i i think i think it's gonna take off like no other with ai chatbots oh have you guys seen the new japanese one

oh i don't like that rock one yeah the grok one i haven't but i've been hearing a lot about it it's like straight out of blade runner 2049 whatever that movie is the new blade runner it's like uh uh waifu ai girlfriend oh no so i think we're gonna have a whole generation of of men that just that's their that's their relationship i was talking about this last week that there was a 14 year old who killed himself because his ai girlfriend told him to and it was like a denaris targaryen did i say that right targaryen targaryen chap tarjay targaryen tarjay babe yeah and he believed that this was his girlfriend so it just feels like it's already kind of taken on this like scary life of its own it's really cooked yeah and like i think another thing with it is like these

guys don't i think if i were to like sit in front of a male that's like i'm lonely the only advice i'd give him is like just go outside just go walk around and just talk to people with no expectations and see what happens yeah but everything is kind of like confining us to stay inside now and like get more and more angry and it's only going to compound and i think it'll be like one of the great poisons to our society unfortunately yeah agreed because like angry oh go ahead oh i mean i was just thinking about the generation of of young men that were like coming up through covid and so if you have four years where you're like quarantined and losing out on those key moments to learn how to be social and then you enter adulthood you know post-college where it's i

find it's way harder to make friends like after college oh yeah when you go from like being in a group where um you're fit like uh you know physically close to people so it's easier to just like keep relationships that way but that also like you're in classes and clubs and sports with people who all have the same interests by default and you go out and like the world where everyone else has their friend groups and whatnot so if you haven't learned or practiced that during covid and then you hit reality now i could see how that's that's pretty rough yeah absolutely that's really relevant to another question someone else asked which was they they want asked if it could be a group discussion of if we think it's harder for men or women to make friends as an

adult i i think it's harder for men i would think so i would agree i i i lean i lean towards men yeah it being harder for men i need to think about that it just it was like the first instinct that came to my mind when i like like i don't know i felt that but like i need to think about why i would say i just it's men i just feel like you always hear like john mulaney had the joke about like your dad doesn't have friends he has your mom's friends husbands and it's like it's so i mean my dad has like lifelong friends but like i don't know the last friend that he made like alone just thinking from like a you know that generation perspective but i also think like women are so much more likely at least just from like you know a woman's perspective just to be

like very like lovey and all over someone that's like new like oh my god you're perfect oh my god we should hang out sometime we should get coffee we should get drinks and like i find it very easy to connect with other women yes and i just think i i don't think that men have the same landscape that women have to just be like radically honest with each other and like be able to build community as easily because of like how patriarchy has taught men to not like feel their feelings or talk about their feelings or like be honest but I know that's not always the case but I think that that's just more largely the case does that make sense yeah but I do feel like you when you move to to seattle you made a big group of friends like very fast like you have like a lot of friends

but going off what she was saying look this is a real discussion when we're bouncing around so like that's super true but i i'm lucky i had that in college because of the fraternity i joined and it was literally like all about what you just said of like we get to like it was a lot of like dumb bullshit that we were doing like like running our heads through walls and shit like stupid stupidity that like you have i think you have to experience or get out of your system but it was a lot it was also like the one place i remember like i think my like pledge master told me this and he wasn't saying in derogatory way he's like this is literally the only place where like we can get young 18 to 22 year old men together and let them be vulnerable without it being labeled as like

societally gay and he's like so you get that and you get like being the dumbest fucking person alive and you get to experience that in these formative years and so then when i went here i was like well i know how to fucking talk to people yeah that makes sense i'm lucky like it's like if i didn't do that i don't know i'd be some fucking weirdo who knows yeah that makes sense yeah you do really need to like be proactive like when making friends as an adult you need to be proactive about putting yourself outside of your comfort zone because like to your point when you're like 18 to 22 you're all in a walkable community you are all in the same classes you live together like it's very easy being in like forced proximity to make friends with people yeah oh yeah and we

were forced to be around each other so like it's funny you saw us together recently we're all super close to like 12 years later but like if we like i don't know if we'd all be friends if we weren't literally forced to be with each other all the time y'all got trauma bonded too which we were talking about that'll do it that'll do it finger in the butt oh but it wasn't gay no no it's brotherhood brotherly fingering it's not gay if it's a surprise brothers with benefits um this is a fun question someone said uh they're on a deserted island together and can only have five things they agreed on so yeah the two of you are on a deserted island you need to agree on five things to bring i feel like five is a lot so let's go to three because i feel like what the

fuck i think that would be easier okay okay but i hear what you're saying i'm just saying it's gonna be a long discussion if it's hypothetical do we have like electricity i'd like to think there's toilet paper toothbrushes and all that you're on a deserted island nothing no electricity what kind of sick shit is this you really gotta think maybe a volleyball um i think one thing that i know we would agree on is sandwich materials but that's like that's all five of them you guys are such like rule nazis can i not say that um uh i feel like a brita would be smart i know i'm not part of this discussion but like things

like that you know like yeah they have to agree okay we can count sandwich materials as one whatever we'll give them that one materials you could have a whole infinite sandwich material yeah yeah as long as you guys agree gabagool some mortadella i love mortadella yeah you really do okay good maybe uh a yacht no that's not bad i don't like how you're thinking we got sandwich materials and a yacht i was thinking about this all wrong um everything else i'll need hbo max subscription to watch what that wasn't don't worry about it succession replay yeah and just like that sex in the city yeah game of thrones what else they'll never come back that's so true probably a knife to cut the sandwiches and then

to like hunt crab and whatnot yo i feel so bad killing a crab i thought about it recently did you did you kill a crab recently no but i was at the i was getting some fish to grill on our barbecue at the it's in salmon bay i don't know the name of it not to like not give him you should check it out it's a good fish market and like i just like i didn't tell you this i just stood there staring at this dungeness crab in the tank it had its claws tied up and it was just like that makes me so fucking sad and i was like dude you don't even know what's about to happen to you like this is so i was so like when their claws are like that well they're all like piled up on top of each other i'm like what are we doing what's the point i don't know sorry i didn't

mean to make this yeah i guess but like why do they need to all be so sad before they die you know give them good life catch them out of the if you catch them out of the ocean i think you know that's probably a better way to go they don't know that they're about to die no anyway now that it's super dark you think you have one more item um let's list we have the yacht sandwich materials a knife an hbo subscription and one more thing um what are we missing we'll be able to watch hbo on the yacht they'll be catching that to make the sandwiches yeah yeah that the yawas part um a wise sage yeah someone who can tell us how to survive on that yeah right that's one of your items an old an old wise chinese sage that speaks to us in like

weird platitudes but uh they just live at the top of the mountain on the island that we have to hike up to it's a real pain in the ass but it gives you something to like look forward to every day hell yeah i think i think we cook i'm with it that's those are all good answers there are some some uh serious questions on on the instagram um what what is the best advice you have for couples who are just moving in together frank you're telling me of me um curious what you're gonna say let's say uh delegate who's gonna be more in charge of each thing in the house start it off and just be like like i'm the dishes person and i like kind of maintain the kitchen and like you maintain the living room

and like you take care of like the bathroom um trash cans and it's like we'll occasionally like do the other thing as well but having it delegated that way saves a lot of bullshit yeah some sort of chore agreement that's what my therapist recommended to like um she was like my husband and i like decided right away like who was in charge of what chores and then it just helps with like accountability you're like oh that's not my chore i'm gonna do my chore totally totally not not having to think about it like division of labor and then there's just less resentment totally you know it's like oh the trash isn't out it's like well i'm the one that takes it out so no problem i'll take it out i think too this question wasn't for us but i'll answer it i think

what helped me a lot was like voicing my fears to you ahead of time yeah yeah i remember that yeah because then it was like i'm not holding it all in and so i'm not dealing with it alone and you're also just like good with helping me like mitigate my concerns when i say them out loud so i think that that just helped a lot i was on a lot of subreddits before we moved in together yeah it's weird it's like it's a it's a scary thing if you think about it totally i was just like fuck it let's get it over with like let's just like not in that way but i was like let's like if not now then when let's just go yeah we'll figure it out as we go yeah we went we went pretty fast six months in yuha lesbians yeah six months yeah i did not realize it was that fast fast yeah

it was pretty fast we found a deal i was also getting death threats at the time so it just kind of felt that's fair yeah yeah it did speed it up yeah what about you mr liz um i definitely agree with the chore list and at least some sort of like uh defining expectations of like uh like what's a a deal breaker like living situation wise like or expectations you know and getting that like out and open or written down is is helpful totally good answer it's a great answer i don't think it's that hard is my my my final take i think it probably is for a lot of people though i don't think it has to be yeah i think i think if there's some prep like a little bit of preparation involved beforehand like mentally yeah think of your relationship as

an anus and you need to prepare it with preparation h oh that fucking bombed no that was i bombed no i bombed it happened no no it's good it was good no nobody laughed it's okay i was expecting you to say bleach i just wasn't expecting the preparation h it's a play on but it's for hemorrhoids though you're not prepping for something um this one seems more like um they need some personal life advice so they asked why do you think men struggle with selective listening and how can their partner help them why are you looking at me like that well because it's a question for you guys what um if someone is uh selective listening they're just being immature and straight up avoiding and

using that as an excuse how can their partner assist oh man i'll just leave them break up with them easy peasy co-signed by mr liz i would be like i'd just be up front about it be like hey it's really bothering me when you do x can you please not do that and that works every time no no follow-ups they just do it what do you think frank so what is selective listening like you only hear what you want to hear okay well sometimes you say things and i just i'm like like my my ram is full and so like i only get some of it you know you know what i mean i think selective listening though is when you whether you're like realizing it or not like you're choosing not to like take in that information because you don't want to deal with

it versus oh i don't do that versus legitimately like just you know you're tired or whatever oh yeah you don't yeah but what would what advice would you give i i i'm i'm like not you don't know i don't even i like i didn't know this is like i don't even know what to say like because you didn't know it was a thing no i i just i forget shit that you tell me all the time i have like bad short-term memory but like i remember what i think is like important things but like sometimes it's just like it just cash miss okay wait selective listening also known as selective attention or selective hearing is the act of consciously focusing on specific parts of a conversation or message while filtering out other information oh you're a dick if you do that so if

you're if you're not like paying attention to the main point of the message you're hyper fixating on one thing i feel like that is i i feel yeah it's like deflecting it's manipulative in a way yeah it's absolutely manipulative i think if someone then you can start talking about that thing instead of paying attention to the bigger problem i hate what people do that i think if someone is doing that you just need to be very direct to them about what they're like the point that they're ignoring and then be like hey i need you to like hear this and if they're still dodging that then there need to be some ramifications like what jail jail jail spanky saying this is a deal breaker for me if you can't figure out how to pay attention to what i'm

actually saying i wouldn't be friends with someone that does annoying that that's very annoying yeah i think it's just i think that it's something that is like i don't know if a partner can help them do that like i think it's something that an immature person will do um it's something that they need to grow out of yeah this is i don't know if it's always yeah yeah i don't know if it's always ill-intentioned it's it's because they feel ashamed yeah they feel too bad right about whatever you're saying or they just don't want to deal with it yeah it's probably a combination of both just deflect that is just deflection i think at the end of the day um this person wants to know what have you guys learned from dating us that blew your mind oh

blew my mind uh what are you laughing about over there he's going first no i'm trying to think my mind is so blown it's hard to put back together yeah good answer uh i would say that amelia knows the lyrics to literally every song ever that blows my mind is that along the lines of the question they're asking yeah cool there are no wrong answers that shit is crazy to me that like you'll just know like the jingles to commercials from 20 years ago the lyrics to every song different renditions of it it's uh it's pretty shocking yeah it's the theater kid in me having to memorize songs so quickly yeah that must be it you're really good at it thanks cutie but it blows my mind still blow your mind you know what i mean

oh my aching quads i think your uh dedication to journaling is pretty cool i'm always very impressed by that especially when you're able to like look back on something like oh this is how i was like feeling on this day like what i'm not always consistent but i try and like somewhat regularly journal that's so great that's such a good thing to do it's helpful to be able to like look back on something i usually only journal for processing yeah not necessarily like this is what happened on this day i try to do a little bit of that but most of it is just talking through what i'm thinking that makes sense i used to document every day for like years when we first started dating you stopped doing that i noticed a little bit before oh but uh i was more inconsistent but

like i think like the year or two before i moved here and then the year or two while i was here i have it all like logged damn it's crazy look back at prompted you to start doing that and then why did you stop no idea i i don't know why i think before i was just like what is it gonna look like to like like get ready to move somewhere then when i got here i'm like i need to write this shit down because it was a lot happening and i was like i look back and then i think i think life got steady and i was like well we're good but who knows i'll publish it someday yeah to an audience of like three you never know you and our three kids what would it be titled um shit i don't know i don't know that's a tough one frank's hot tails

prince hot tails frank's hot tails hot tails instead of frank's hot sauce that's good that's good that's very good that's good um another question uh how did you know that you wanted to date slash be with me and amelia oh fuck yeah these are the questions tell everyone uh just how fun and easy it was to talk to you and hang out with you it's like this is this is awesome keep doing this she's blushing it's a good ass answer uh i think what no no nothing um i think there was like after the third date we had i was like i had that like thing where i'm like i'd be so sad if i never saw this person again and i think that's when i was like wait that's i want to keep doing this but before the the first

two dates you were like fuck this bitch no i see how it is we'll fight about this later just kidding that was a good answer yeah i think so i think that's what it was how did you know that you wanted to be with frank um i realized that i loved being around him and then when i wasn't around him i wanted to be and i was like that's new that's so sweet it's true i was just like i i preferred to be around you we were hanging out like every day when we first started dating yeah i was just like i don't want to wait till the next date we made can you come over i know i don't want to wait we're such good buddies yeah we are we still are yeah that was the other thing we were just like it just felt like hanging out with a friend yeah that i wanted to fuck

i was very team frank yeah so and i'm a big hater so is mr liz yeah yeah both of you were team frank before i was team frank she was on a frog kissing marathon there for a second last week mr liz was like it was kind of fun meeting the boyfriend of the week that was true i was i was like it was it was it was of the week give me my note card yeah we're like and who is this guy yeah it was a while to this day i don't know most of their real names me neither it's like i just only know them by monikers i i'm exactly like the listeners i'm like who is that it's weird having not been there because i feel like it would be entertaining as a third party yeah i thought i'd be like oh enjoying that but just hearing the stories from you i'm

like damn that must have been funny it was a time it was a time i had some especially bad times like right before I met you yeah so I earned you I love it what about you how did you know I was thinking about it and I was think I think um it's probably similar to Frank where I just started to like Mr. Liz so much that I was like hmm if this is an exclusive then I'm gonna have to leave because I'll be too sad yeah I don't want to get too like entangled and with someone if they don't want to like exclusively start dating and you weren't trying to be exclusive with anyone at that point yeah that's how I

that's I think that's especially how I knew is I wasn't trying to be in a relationship and then yeah you like someone so much that you're like I actually only want to see you yeah people the do-si-do on you bring up the question okay somebody asked

do the boys have any interesting slash wild slash cringy dating stories question mark exclamation mark um this is third third party dating story but when i uh first moved in to seattle i lived in a house with four other dudes and three of the rooms were downstairs in the basement all of them quite small but one of them was so small and the only way to fit a bed into it was to put it in this little nook that just fit a twin bed we referred to that room as the missionary

only room because that's all you could do yeah that's all you could do the twin bed that was literally touching both walls um and the guy that lived down there um on two separate occasions i was just like in my room hanging out and heard him bring someone back and then be like do you want to see a magic trick and then he would do some sort of close-up magic that then ended in them hooking up he's getting his fucking shit slobbered on after what i want to know did he just think the magic trick was really cool or was he like this is my in to impress the ladies like she's already in your house right already in the house already in the basement bedroom like you're doing something right you know you don't need to do close-up magic exactly so i don't know

if it was like a funny way that he pulled out or put on a condom or something i should ask him what the trick was you still don't know what the trick was i don't know what the trick was i should talk magic like like in uh south park i think i get it sometimes you gotta like get your mojo as a man even if it's like signed sealed and delivered you gotta like you gotta have that moment of like i still fucking got it you still got it his thing is the magic trick what's your thing babe i don't have a thing i would ask you if you would like to kiss is that is that what you did with your first kiss well he wrote me a limerick and yeah for yeah what was the limerick oh should i read it we've done this before i'd like to

yeah put it up pull it up not yeah okay in college i would just be like do you want a bottle of water at these parties where there were no there's no water anywhere damn which sounds fucked up but that's not the point there was always like there's already rapport there but it was like were you like creating scarcity of water so that when you brought it out that makes me sound creepy now like oh my god i'm so parched no i just feel like all the taps in this house party yeah that'd be we had a lot of sinks but i've got water bottles in my room if you want to get out of here how many people do you think pissed in that sink at the parties you wouldn't believe it i think i would the amount of piss and puke everywhere i was texting um i was texting my

former roommate um anna uh about when we lived in we lived in this area called the courtyard because there was a courtyard in between um a bunch of like connected houses and it turned into just like a dumpster zone because there were a few groups of fraternities that also lived in some of the houses in the courtyard and they like brought a couch out and abandoned it in the courtyard and we would walk outside and people would be asleep on that couch it was in rain and snow um people definitely peed on it and was this like in a college town yeah yeah okay that's see i i love like i love the funny thing about college to me is like wherever you went you lived in like a different like community especially if you did greek life too the school i went to didn't allow

a greek row it was abolished in like the 60s so yeah we didn't have a greek row either but so but none of the houses were near each other but ours was in the the hood of long beach because it had been there since like 50s or 60s and so like we had none of that but we would just go outside and see crazy hood shit like i remember we were sitting on like our roof once and um we're i'm sorry am i rambling no i'm sorry i was trying to find the limerick we're sitting on our roof and um we're at the corner dude right it's like commercial corner and uh there's a a mortuary where they like burn people right cremate them sorry crematorium well it was it was a whole thing they'd cremate them and do all the stuff and so there's always hearses going in

there and then it was connected to a jack-in-the-box drive-thru and we're sitting there and i'm at the combination jack-in-the-box mortuary no so so so and and these cars would speed down uh atlantic avenue which lived on and we're watching a car speed down and we're like oh he's trying to make like he's trying to bang the corner into the jack-in-the-box drive-thru and he missed it and jumped up and like got a hole into the mortuary and i'm like this is the funniest shit i mean it's sad but they're already dead he delivered himself you're already dead the people in there yeah maybe now he is too but i think it like that's the dichotomy of like college town or or that you know and i'm like i kind of wish i had the

college town feel too in a way yeah you know yeah i don't know i don't know why i went off on that i just that triggered something in me the piss couch took you back the piss couch dude yeah do you have the limerick on your phone maybe my messages are indexing so i can't search through them damn apple get your shit together my friends had an indoor piss couch because the same girl peed on it at least twice after getting blackout drunk oh god i i never peed the bed when i was black even at my worst i always made it out of bed here's the limerick okay there once was a girl who just took a piss okay for context i was expecting this to be sweet like two and a half years ago the piss couch is about yeah that was a bad segue i'm gonna do a little bit of explaining

so i had written a penis limerick for the podcast patreon and i was telling frank about it on our third date and then i went to the bathroom and he was like you better hurry up or i'm gonna have like i'm gonna write a limerick while you're gone and i was like okay well don't let me down losing my chance and so you had you kissed on the third date yeah this was before we had ever kissed this is how he asked me to kiss for the first time there once was a girl who just took a piss her name is amelia what a miss like m ms not like i was a miss yeah anyway following important distinction on the night of thursday i thought this is how i would say that now would be a great time for a kiss game and i was reading it and i was like i just started laughing and i was like

like okay i was like oh this might be it might be over for me wait did you kiss at the bar yeah oh yeah i immediately after that was red yeah i hopped over to her side and was like we should just start doing this what bar were you at the back door uh yeah back door i call it outback i keep forgetting outback steakhouse we're at outback steakhouse if you had your first kiss that outback steakhouse i think that would be the most on-brand thing ever too honestly we should have them sponsor your wedding oh yeah yeah we should we should tongue kiss next to a blooming onion yeah i'm down uh so that was that was how uh how did that come up i don't know well we were talking about the magic trick oh right yeah you gotta do something to make

you feel like i i still got it yeah and and you did man that's so funny did you have a move it's an open question i didn't have a move i am think that the limerick uh reminds me of i went on a date to um add a ball and you know the upstairs section there i don't even know what that is we've been it's like a pinball but they have a cool um kind of patio upstairs patio that's nice when you get inevitably overwhelmed by how loud it is downstairs and there was a jenga set on each block there was kind of like a cutesy like truth or dare thing written on it and my date was just like no no no for each one and i was like lame so not fun icky vicky yeah nice babe that could have been so fun and flirty that is really that's like what yeah they were all like

so tame and a little bit flirty i was like oh this is like perfect like kind of transition in the date moment and then just each one just no yeah well you learned everything you need to know yeah exactly no wonder no wonder i was a shining star on our first date i i came out with um jello shots because i was like he's either gonna be cool and fun and take these jello shots with me a plate of tachos to my face in front of you yeah well so um on our first date we went to twilight yeah um and mr liz ordered a plate of tachos which is tater tot nachos loaded uh fully loaded tachos fully loaded and it's good smelling and i i had eaten before our date because i had previously like been on a date where the person i met up with like he didn't clarify he just

wanted drinks so i didn't eat anything and i was starving yeah it sucked um so then i was like oh i'm gonna eat beforehand because i don't i was assuming it was just gonna be a drinks thing so he crushed a whole plate of tachos to himself and i'll do it again i believe it what do they top them with cheese sour cream onion chicken hot sauce chives chives yeah the works i fucking love that that sounds really good fun fact about twilight what is it i got fingered in that bar oh my god and we have talked about that on the podcast i was recounting i was recounting to my friend the other day the the how fucking chaotic that evening was it was very chaotic it was there was a lot happening i was handing out shrooms like candy to everyone just openly yeah like in

front of the bartenders didn't do any but there's coke being done in the bathroom really yeah this is how i learned there was blow in the bathroom you didn't know that they were doing blow well now that i know who was doing blow you think they were in there shitting and laughing the two of i think that's the only way they were still awake but okay the most can i say the most fucked up thing that happened in my opinion sure absolutely so this is my 30th birthday by the way yeah okay uh pajama party okay so we all show up to this dive bar in pajamas like the normal divey crowd there is like okay you know cool but whatever um one of my friends got like blackout drunk uh and she's she is at the time was in a lesbian relationship now same

but a different partner but she's she's it was a different yeah she's still a lesbian yeah but now dating someone else however she started she started calling this dude the f slur to his face like tagging him on a straight man and this okay he started had a breakdown and started crying she triggered his like ptsd no this is so fucked up because i don't know who i know like apparently i found out later had been like beaten up by some cops while they were calling him that and frank has his hand over his mouth i do not think it's funny to be assaulted by police officers and i don't think it's funny to be this is very openly an a-cab podcast it's like five foot two little lesbian made this man cry in the bar i was like we're done we're out of here

he and he needed to be essentially like carried out of the bar by the guy that fingered me i've been involuntarily cucked oh no i'm in the cuck chair he was so apologetic that he had to leave and emilia was like i don't care like i don't know you it's like okay stop stop stop facetiming me it's gonna be fine you have that effect on people thanks babe well when you want to emilia's the only person i really facetime yeah it's my favorite that we haven't facetimed in a long time no you never facetimed me well you do live times you yeah you should change that i know damn i didn't know i could

so rude our buddies if i can't get a hold of amelia i'll facetime you yeah well okay i mean it's like when i'm trying to call my mom and she doesn't answer so i call my dad that's why you too mom with you yeah mom's not answering her phone our friends that facetime me just to go ew when i open it up so mean that's really funny how many chins you got i'm like come on dude what else what else where we at now what happened at your 30th birthday we all went around and said how much we love amelia and why yeah oh that was at the cried the the dinner before the party your mom hand painted a beautiful picture of you oh yeah it's still it's in our store our stairwell it was kind of the opposite vibes of mine it was

a very wholesome start to the the birthday my third was what i needed and then we did um karaoke and okay i'm remembering i got really drunk you did two people hooked up that ended up dating for quite a bit of time who recently broke up at your birthday oh i didn't realize that was the first time they hooked up like since high school they were underage when they were hooking up the first time yeah that's weird i don't know why i took it there your 30th was great release the epstein files yeah on that note um your 30th was fun too i don't know what do we do we had people over to kebab you didn't want to do anything yeah you got the horse you got the horse statue we all did mushrooms the chinese coated horse we did mushrooms oh and then that's what we did the

sons with bad aura oh yeah yeah yeah yeah oh it got fucking weird now i think about it my 30th that was so much fun yeah we all yeah we all did mushrooms and then liz got so high so fast and i thought we were i was unwell you were like i might have to go home we were here we've been here for 15 minutes i was having a panic attack yeah we should i'm it's it's time again we're just doing saturday i won't saturday i'm gonna be in tacoma i'm driving to port angeles oh damn you're all alone you guys had your excuses ready you want to come do shrooms in port angeles with me no tsunami warning oh shit no it's it happened it's been called off all right it happened okay um that's fine but that was like a good call back to port angeles though yeah he heard one port

angeles fact listen that was fun we had kebab and uh mushy's yeah what more could you ask for i think uh you had the fun the most fun 30th birthday of this group i just wanted to eat meat with everyone yeah you had no expectations which is a good way to have yeah nothing just want to hang out with my buddies what did you do for your 30th uh actually did go to port angeles for my 30th and then well a whole bunch of things happened where i was like uh there's like a real pain in the ass like i woke up and my leg hurt so bad and i thought i had a blood clot no and yeah and i have this like varicose vein in my calf and it was very painful oh god and i like called my mom who's a nurse and i was like do you think i

should do anything about this and she said like it's not it's unlikely that it's a blood clot but it's possible and it's not worth not finding out yeah totally yeah i went to urgent care and they gave me an ultrasound and they're like yeah it's not a blood clot we don't really know it's a baby yeah you're pregnant but that was like the morning of me trying to get ready to go on this like drive ski trip so that was my morning and then such a great way to bring in like a new decade is like having a health scare nothing says getting older quite like a good health um seth or my friend who's gonna come got snowed in in bellingham so he ended up showing up like a day late and then my other friend got stuck somewhere i don't remember why

uh well eventually made it out there yeah it was good once you once you did it was fine okay fuck yeah it was fun hanging out with like just your friends and there's not a lot of pressure yeah um liz tried side country skiing for the first time that was on your 30th that was still when i had like my leg injury so i couldn't really like be very mobile yeah and you still did it good for you what happened to your leg i also did start crying i had like a pinched nerve in my leg and it would like get exacerbated pretty easily you won us like 100 bucks at pull tabs though oh that's right i did that was fun we did pull tabs i won 100 bucks and it paid for our bar tab fuck yeah you have a varicose vein in your calf can you see it yeah probably

see this guy oh shit what what a way to ring in your 30s you'll never believe where i have a varicose i probably will god tell tell it on the literally in between my two balls does it ever hurt i didn't know that's what i thought it was supposed to look like that no i was having like really bad like testicular pain like a year ago to the point where i was like concerned and like we couldn't like make sweet love because i was like it hurts it was like nauseating and i went to the doctor and they did an ultrasound on my balls which is the weirdest fucking yeah they got them all gelled up it was just like god bless her this like very sweet like colombian lady like older and she's like i'm gonna put the the stuff the the it's

gonna be cold and they're like you know applying i don't know how he got here but and then they did it and like you have a varicose seals and you have a big varicose vein in between and now i just like you know we'll just put like squeeze and look at it that's good that he moved it away well did they solve the pain um they pretty much were like there's nothing you can do about this what yeah they're like it'll go away in time apparently a lot of guys deal with deal with this but um they're like there's not much you can do and you should not get surgery they're like if it gets worse maybe that's an option but like you don't want to fuck with this so here's some pain meds and it was just like high dose ibuprofen i cannot imagine having the pain i

had on my leg on my balls that sounds miserable it didn't get that bad thankfully because they're smaller veins but like you said varicose fan i'm like dude that's not okay that's it's the worst damn yeah well i'm glad i don't have balls we we have it pretty tough us us men i think that's what i want the listeners to get out of this that's the takeaway men have it harder you can't get a varicose vein on your this whole this whole like patriarchy thing isn't as fun as it sounds and as easy as it sounds oh we know it's not fun oh it has a question oh great would he rush set would he rush b site or a site on dust 2 i don't know what that means i feel like he spelled this wrong let me see oh would he rush b site or a site on dust 2 okay rush b obviously that's

a counter strike question always rush b yeah you heard it here first are you guys trying to close us out yeah we're at 55 minutes someone said okay wait liz has strong opinions we stand how does mr liz handle disagreements on these pick your battles folks uh if you think i have strong opinions wait until you meet mr liz do you yeah who has the stronger opinions between the two of you probably me but i'll i won't say anything about it after a certain point whereas i think you'll be more vocal about it that's funny i i know i'm right i don't need to convince other people i guess i didn't realize i'm someone who has strong opinions what when was the moment you realized this relationship was real and did that scare you probably when you agreed to be exclusive

with me and it didn't scare me it relieved me i was like fuck yeah nice good answer and then we signed the lease i'm like that's two years she's not getting back locked in locked in i'm like i'm not helping you move out if you want to leave and now you're stuck with me sucker yeah really suckered yourself into this um probably on the car ride back from portland when we had that long weekend date i was like oh this is so like easy and nice i definitely feel something like real here and it wasn't scary oh nice you cuties what the fuck should we leave you guys alone me and mr libs are gonna go make out now on that note well thanks you guys thank you thank you this was so fun yeah thanks for letting us

yeah making it happen early hour early hour baby oh you know what we should do you should put this at the intro you should do like an old welcome to the broly hour i'm mr liz and i'm frank i think just keeping it the way no absolutely we should we know we absolutely just recorded that so we're good we can use it yeah you got you fooled you don't want to do it haters us being true to ourselves i had this dream huh i had this dream and it's now died well thank you for being here yeah this is the best love you guys do you want to sing us out no this is kind of like we hang out all together we all hang out together this is what we do yeah we just have microphones in front of us this time we gotta take the super bowl story though oh yeah not right now not on

the podcast sorry it's not for listener ears all right well anyway this is like that shit drives me nuts when people like i got this crazy story i'll tell you off mic