The Hoely Hour - The New Testament E1

Episode Date: June 29, 2020

Different sex drives, public sex, and dates with dictators who just really love chili. The girls give candid updates on their love lives and read stories and questions from listeners in the first episode of The New Testament! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

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May slow when network is busy. See terms. um so we don't know if this is going to be like a mini episode or what we're really going to do with this we'll see yeah but we want it to be kind of like a touch base corner like update updates on um what we've kind of experienced since guys have started listening to this podcast should we call this like the new testament the new just yeah upgraded holy bible like um we want to read like your guys's stories and like give advice and stuff and also give you an updated version of the stories that we've told yeah the new test yeah some updates yeah this is the new

testament baby hell yeah new testament episode one so let me crack this that'll be our like intro music yeah wait let me get a lighter welcome to the new testament of the holy hour ah that was a really good crack yeah that was a good the white claw really came through for our intro song okay update corner so i know i mentioned that i haven't had sex since september and i finally had sex for the first time last night and it was not good it was so bad i'm so sorry but like he we talked about it he knows it's bad and also he listens to this podcast so hey there is nothing worse than a guy that like gives you bad sex and then they're

like oh god you're a fucking animal that was amazing I just laid there at least he at least I didn't just lay there but yeah at least he like knew it wasn't good right I know you didn't just just like I'm already tired I just want this to be over yeah I immediately texted Amelia I was like had sex it was not good she sent me this text like bad worse it was so bad it was so bad I was like are you okay are you okay like what kind of bad um and so the guy that I hooked up with like we've been talking for like a few weeks now so we were kind of expecting like we would hook up he didn't pressure me at all but he knows it was bad we talked about it being bad after and like I think that this is like totally fair like I think guys get in their own head and that's

totally what happened with him he was like in his own head about it my neighbors are celebrating something good for them yeah good for you guys you're having a good time please wear a mask though yeah um yeah we talked about he was too in his own head and he did listen to the podcast and he like so he knew some of the things that I liked and like kind of a little bit about how I was in bed and I think that that kind of probably like made him overthink his performance um and then you know like he also knows that I haven't had sex since September so I think that there was he was just putting a lot of pressure on himself but it was just like not good and I'm I'm like bummed that it wasn't good but you know at least like he was honest with me like we could

be kind of candid about it but the self-awareness of recognizing that it wasn't his best performance as well just like being able to say like yeah like that wasn't I'm so sorry and not just being like knocked it out of the park again good one yeah yeah high-fiving yeah high-five myself um but so we had been like we like ate dinner and like um we had been drinking like beer and like white claw and i was like i was sober by the time we were like hooking up um and also i don't really like to have drunk sex i like lose all feeling down there yeah i just am not as like i i don't have as much sensory down there okay but it's the opposite when i'm high when i'm high it's like mind-blowing anyways that's that's for another time um so we were this is so embarrassing

I feel like it's more embarrassing for him but it was still really weird for me he was like very like gurgly like um like not burping but like kind of oh you could hear it in his chest like it was becoming a burp while he was going down on me i was like i'm gonna tell everyone you burped into my his digestive system was like this is food he's like it's dessert time baby oh my god oh yeah so i was like well and then i literally made him stop i think that was like i was like i was like we have to stop and then we were gonna do something else i was like he like seemed so flustered and I was like do you want to stop and then he was like actually

yeah can we so then we stopped and mid it was a sad day for both of us yeah but you know I give it is what it is I give him a lot of credit for what it's worth being able to recognize that like he wasn't going to this wasn't going to end up well for either of you and so like let's just cut our losses and just call it a night I would rather like it be bad sex we ended early than like bad sex and like only he comes I yes I just feel super disrespected when that's the outcome when they come and then they're like that was great thanks and then it's like so like I think that being able to just be like well like it's gonna take a while for me to come and then I'm probably not gonna make you come because this is bad sex so like let's just like call it a day yeah I don't

know I think that that takes some strength because that must have been kind of embarrassing for him well and he's self-aware enough to like not you know like I don't know how to explain this like with the dry hand job guy he slut shamed you and then was still like give me a hand job and still ejaculated like and then I never said how that story ended too afterward I was like laying on the bed all sexy like my turn and he was like oh like can you get dressed yeah he was like this is awkward because like you're so awake now but I think I'm gonna go home oh my god I'll be better at making myself come anyway I'll walk you out I can tell that you don't have um a lot of sexual competence probably take a few seconds to find the sexual competence of a saltine cracker

i think saltine crackers are sexier honestly just like dry mouth i'm not i wish i could take that back well yeah so at least this guy like he had the self-awareness to be like yeah this is like not good sex it'll be so shameful if we just like keep going for the sake of just doing it yeah and nobody likes that nobody wants to have sex just for the sake of having sex like this isn't going well for either of us let's call it I am sorry that it was disappointing though because like it had been there's been so long it's been so long and that's why and like not to be like too candid but that's what this whole podcast is I guess it's just like when you haven't had sex for so long and you're finally in like a place where you're like you know

what I'm happy with myself and I am all I want is just like kind of a casual sexual relationship that's all I'm really looking for so when you get to that place where you're just like comfortable and confident and that you know what you want you you don't need the like bells and whistles you don't need the romance like I just want to get yeah like I just want good sex yes so I think that there's we talked about this on episode one like this narrative around boys treating sex that way at an early age just like well I just want to have sex and women are the emotional ones that's just and whether that's true or not that's what we were like spoon fed for so long yeah so being able to recognize that it's like I don't need to be wined and dined every single time like sometimes

it's okay to just want sex guys just want sex often so why can't we also just want to have sex for the sake of having sex and I and it's like I just want to have good sex that's that's it like I'm perfectly fine in my own company I like don't need the romance right now I don't have like I don't know I just am not in a place where I want to be in a relationship that takes like time and work and I don't want to do that right now so yeah that's I think that's the only reason is like that I'm a little disappointed is just because I'm like I was like raring to go for so long yeah um but I mean we talked about it and like I think we both were disappointed but I would rather us both be comfortable with each other than like you know be like I'm never gonna talk

domain like i'll i'll give it another college try we'll see yeah we obviously asked you guys for like uh submissions for stories or if you wanted advice on something so we're gonna try and put some of those into these episodes and break them down into like minisodes or something you know if this is something you guys like then we'll keep doing it yeah yeah it's a test baby test okay all right so here's one my partner and I are on two different pages when it comes to intimacy I woman in preferences literally don't care about sex lol like I know that's so bad but I think it's because growing up you are taught through society that it's all about the guy finishing and the women are just there to do that and I still kind of feel this way I also hate

talking to him about it if I please myself or not sometimes I do but could also go like two weeks without but my partner who is a male would like to have sex every day twice a day if possible lol never happening how do I get more comfortable with being intimate I feel like it's such a bad question to ask two years later and it sucks even more because from the moment we started dating he is always wanting to please me asking me questions on what feels good or what doesn't why don't i ever finish and that's so opposite of anything i've ever experienced before i feel like this was just one big ramble sorry one funny note the first time we had sex my nuva ring came off on him i screamed i'll give that back so that was chill i love that last

sentence i probably freaked him out like why did this thing did you just lay an egg what the fuck is that you should just lay an egg um this is interesting we actually kind of touched on this in our first episode too talking about how um sex ed has like throughout growing up yeah sex ed has been very disappointing and talking about the realistic points of dating and having sex yeah Like, you're not prepared for, to be pressured into sex, but also, um, everything has prepared us to believe that we are supposed to just be a vessel. Yeah. Yeah. Like, we're interchangeable.

Yes. I know. it's like interesting to read this sentence where you're talking about your partner asking questions on like what feels good and what doesn't and um asking like you know like how he can get you off that's something that I feel like needs to be normalized more and I think a lot of women have the experience of like why the why is he asking me this because we're not used to that I think because a lot of guys and also I'm a little bit I hate this about myself but I don't want to always have to tell someone what i like and what i want you know i want it to be like a natural um like

i want it to click naturally yeah i like i maybe that's weird too i don't think it's weird because there's a personal thing i think we've all had sex with someone who were just like oh damn this is like really good the chemistry here is off the charts and like i know what he likes and he knows what i like and we don't have to talk about it yeah like i think that's like everyone's ideal situation where they don't have to have a discussion about it but if you're with if you've been with this guy for two years and if you see this continuing you do need to have this conversation yeah absolutely you should be enjoying sex i mean it's not some people just don't this is i think could be like oh this is like a endless conversation that we could have because there i

think that there's a lot of things that contribute to whether you like having sex or not and it could be like your past or it could be like you might have a hormonal imbalance it could be literally anything but like being able to have that conversation with someone that you've been with for two years is important and necessary if if you want to at least try to enjoy sex sex should if you know yeah it should be something that you can also enjoy it should be enjoyable for both of every time there are a lot of different things that could be going into why your desire for sex isn't isn't the same and I think it's worth looking at how do you sincerely feel about this relationship because you might think in your head you're gonna marry this guy but at the end of the

day if you deep down know it's not a good relationship you ultimately know it's it's going to end um but also i would say it's worth if you examine your sexual past and there are things that are painful for you to think about that's worth exploring and if you have the opportunity to see a therapist that will definitely help you um just like deconstruct those those ideas and feelings around sex to a point where like it will be kind of hard but at the end of the day you'll be able to process it yeah and then have a more enjoyable relationship with sex and maybe have a better sex drive um and it could be a hormonal imbalance so there's also like supplements for women yeah to to help you like with hormonal imbalances or with having a low

sex drive i've gotten ads for like um supplements for like women with low sex drives and i was like a little yeah like they had viagra for forever yeah and it's covered by insurance or something oh my god yeah don't get me yeah yeah we're about to be mad here but um yeah there's a lot of different aspects and i think those are all worth looking into like yeah um it's there's nothing wrong with you no my god i i have actually honestly had this conversation with a lot of my girlfriends where we've talked about we've like tried to give advice to each other about this exact thing like why don't i want to have sex with my boyfriend like he he is always wanting to have sex and it's definitely worth exploring um i feel like men just always want to have sex

anyways yeah they're always ready to go i have this conversation a lot of my guy friends like they they are just like a light switch but um we're a little we're a little different I think there might be like an evolutionary reason for that who knows I'm not a scientist but I think there might be there probably is probably there's like gotta spread their seed and then go hibernate for a little bit I don't know um and women are like are you um mentally capable of like keeping up with me okay because this like a lot of sexual attraction for me is like are you clever are you witty the mental stimulation yeah the the mental stimulation and the emotional stimulation are huge factors into sexual attraction yeah so maybe it's worth having a conversation

like not when you guys are having sex like outside of having sex have like a heart-to-heart about the things that you want and also like i don't know try experimenting totally do you maybe you're into role play yeah if you have kinks or something like now is the time to explore that and don't do not feel ashamed of any of your kinks like no yeah i've sold pictures of my feet to strangers on the internet so yeah i'll tell that story sometime i'm looking forward to that one yeah i think also if if you look at this and try to figure out like ways like avenues around trying to get to the bottom of this issue if you don't want to actually do the work then that's another thing to definitely look at like if you're not willing to explore if you're not willing to have

the conversations then i think that there's probably a deeper issue there um which then warrants some discovery in itself not i'm not saying that your relationship isn't right for you i'm not saying that that's something that only you could know but i think trying to figure out within what could be causing this too is is definitely worth um dedicating some of your time and energy into so we've had a couple of guys reach out to us um that we've talked about that have ended up listening to the podcast yeah do you want me to go first yeah so um since i mean have i only had one guy reach out to me that yeah i did okay so uh reese if you're listening i'll still fuck you up i'm thinking reese is eventually gonna hear it because we have a very strong line

of people like one of my close friends is good friends with one of his close friends so i think it's gonna work its way down the line you don't know me you don't know i exist yet but we have beef yeah my guy fuck you up she's gonna find a time machine and yeah i'll show i'll pull up to your middle school evergreen 28 year old adult woman punches 13 year old in the face and i'll be like you know why he would he's so mean just do a little one of an underhanded little ball yeah ball bop you know why yeah just enough you know what you did yeah you spit on him and hop out of your time machine i'll be like what you're like respect women

you better be careful when when 2020 rolls around my guy we respect we out here respecting women he's the only person whose name we've actually used i know i you know i don't know what reese does now i don't know what he's up to these days i don't either i didn't really know what he was up to before but he was a model for a sec there because why waste a face you know like that but anyway so besides um the potential of re-tearing everything I heard from Texas he I keep talking to you like I haven't already talked to you about this a million times but I got it was thrilling it was very exciting I was so nervous so Texas deleted his social media so I was under the false assumption that he would never find out about the holy hour but I have been

linking it wherever I can and part of that was linking it on snapchat which he recently added me on and so um like an hour after I posted it I got a screenshot from Texas of the podcast and he said I'm about 12 minutes in and I texted Liz and I was like what the fuck do I do I was like oh I got it I'm gonna just distract him make him listen to episode one first and then he'll be too busy to listen to episode two but then I went and looked and minute 12 was where his story started and there was way too much identifying information in there for him to not know exactly who I was talking about so I was like all right well enjoy and he was like well no wait I like I want to talk about this after and I was like this could be anything and while all of this was happening like

we were working so Amelia and I were messaging each other on teams and she was like oh my god she's like sending me screenshots of the things he was saying because i don't i can't do more than one app during the workday so we just message each other on teams instead of texting our it department ever looks through our iams we're gonna we'll be on a list or something we would be we probably already are um yeah so we're messaging each other on teams and i i was freaking out because I like I don't know I was like this could go one of two ways it could have gone so south I could have gotten like an email from his lawyer with like a cease and desist it could have been anything so I was freaking out and then once he answered I was in a two-hour meeting and so I

couldn't look at my phone and Liz was IMing me like what did he say I was like I don't know I'm too afraid to look but he texted me and he was like novel coming your way in five minutes god my heart dropped into my butt when you said that I was like I really thought it was gonna be like hey listen like this is kind of creepy I was like he's either gonna be stoked or he's gonna be like uh that was kind of weird yeah it was it was one of the two there's no area for anything else there's no space so he um sent me this actual novel it was such a long text that probably the best text I've ever gotten it was so thoughtful he like broke down like how he feels about the podcast which was all very kind and then the second point was like all of these dating app

things that dudes see a lot of which I let him know in my response like we were actually talking about having a guy on for the dating app episode but um pandemic pending we won't have guests for a little bit and also like not to let you not to let you guys in on the secret but we're really bootstrapping it over here like I don't know how to add a third like person to this like microphone situation wait that's true it only has we only have one microphone and then it like picks up on both ends like a back and forth and that's why it like yeah it's not like we both have our own microphone so Texas I'm shitting my pants at home and Amelia's shitting her pants I was having a breakdown as I'm reading this text because it's like at the like I was saying in the in the

beginning he was just breaking down like things that he liked about the podcast itself and then as the text went on he was like um I definitely didn't see you in that restaurant he didn't he wasn't like was that mean that you were talking about because of fucking course it was who else lived here we have one mutual friend moved to Texas and was on this hot dudes reading Instagram page like that would be a weird thing to have two of in my life yeah um so he's like I don't remember seeing you in that restaurant I definitely don't remember seeing you on hinge like I don't just swipe but like I did ask our mutual friend who you were once you followed me on Instagram because I thought you were cute and I was like tell me something I don't know I'm just kidding

and then he was like um my job is still in Seattle so there's a non-zero chance of me coming back um but also I have a million miles on Alaska and I would love if you came down to visit me and then he said i won't wear sweatpants for nothing which was a callback to me talking about guys not showing up just show up in sweatpants without the intention of having sex and i was like and he used so many big words in this text which liz is a writer so she probably didn't even like notice because you are so good with words but like i was like oh because he went to yale so it's like that's the yale talking using that yale dictionary oh oh my god oh my god he like knows so many words i love an ivy liga oh you know what i want to go up to this question

uh or not a question it's like a comment so i had sex in my college business classroom now i've been looking for more discreet slash open places discreet slash open is like contradictory but i guess they're like there are just like something that's public but discreetly public like a corner of a library yeah so i have had sex in my college library shut up uh-huh and it was like um the door so i could rent out we could rent out rooms and stuff yeah so i rented out a room and the door had no window and I knew that but that like you're still in a public place yeah so that's why it was like super hot and I know he's listening um it's uh Frodo John Misty oh my god of course I should have known that uh yes and it was so good oh fuck I hate that it was

so good actually no I don't sex in public just hits different yeah it totally does like the up the anticipation of being caught is like really sexy I think that's yeah yeah like I like I vividly remember that experience and it was like the middle of the night too because it was during finals week and like the library was open 24 7 because all of us are trying to get our final projects done and yeah I like had reserved the room and we were waiting for our turn to go in and then I like lied about whatever project I was working on just so we could fuck in there and yeah we were there for like maybe 30 minutes 45 minutes oh I'm so jealous I've always wanted to do shit like that it was phenomenal I had sex like on a lake at night like nobody was around

which was still like yeah it's so hot we've had like I had sex like in front of like big open windows and hotels and stuff and even just that like kind of aspect of like voyeurism is kind of like the possibility of like maybe somebody's watching us right now I don't know but not I've always wanted to have sex like in a library or like in an in someone's office like I want to like have sex on like a big important businessman's desk just like a big conference yeah table yeah like I own this fucking company and now we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna bang on the conference table yeah I don't know what's so I don't I really can't put my finger on it it's just the danger of it is really sexy to me I don't know like travel sex hits different you know oh yeah when you're

not having sex in your own bed if you're like anywhere else like if you're at an Airbnb in another state and you have sex there's just like something exciting about like not being in your usual place yeah like we're at this romantic Airbnb and we're gonna like have killer sex yeah yeah or like something in public even if it is discreet it's just like the potential of like maybe getting caught even though you know you're not going to but the fact that you're in public is like the exciting part yeah look at us go this could be such a good story later yeah i think just anywhere out of bed like even having sex in the kitchen is like yes anywhere that's not in your bed like not the usual or just going down to the floor i was having sex recently and i was just

like do you want to fuck on the floor and he was like okay and it was yeah just fun doing that get crafty like the floor next to the bed was even like adventurous knock everything off the dresser yes have sex there like i don't know yeah have you ever had sex on like the kitchen counter yes yeah that see even that hits differently it really it it's just like the i i think it's because like the idea of like you can't stop yourself uh-huh from like ripping each other's clothes off and just having sex oh god i love that that's why it's so hot it is and it's rare it's a rare find it really is i had sex in a bathroom at a party in college that was fun that was like that's pretty it was like one of those like college parties where there was like

a line for the bathroom like wrapping around the place and we're like we're just gonna go to like speed up the time and be like a quickie in the bathroom it like wasn't very quick but it was like the danger of that like somebody could just like bang down the door right now i love that i just love that i don't know i have 1.5 updates so uh with no shoes aka frodo aka father john misty should we call him father john frodo father john that's perfect i was about to say i father john he has way too many nicknames but yeah he has too many nicknames we're gonna give him one my friends have been referring to him as no shoe no shoe no shoe man okay so maybe we call him that i don't know like father father john frodo i think that's really funny it's good

let's call him father okay so i have an update on father john frodo um we have not talked in six years and I didn't I didn't expand on this in episode one but the way things ended between us was really hard for me um he tried ghosting me and we had been like hooking up and like talking and we were clearly dating we've been dating for like six months or something and then he tried ghosting me and then finally I was just like I don't care what you're doing you're gonna come over and we're gonna talk about this because you can't just like disappear try and disappear when he came over and ended things he was like well you're graduating and I'm moving away I just like I didn't I didn't think that this would could keep working and I was like that's fair but how long

have you even been feeling like this like if you've been thinking this for a while and he was like I don't know like two months or something that's a long time and then I was like if you had been feeling like this like why didn't you talk to me about it and then he said because the sex was so good like he didn't want to stop having sex with me or yeah and it was like essentially along the lines of like I've only been with you because I enjoyed having sex with you and obviously he listens to this and like I don't know if that's what he meant but that's how I interpreted it and that's how I've carried it for the last six years but that really fucked with me for a long time and I'm not gonna like dance around it like that's a super painful thing for

someone to hear like I clearly cared a lot about him and I wrote the best poem I've ever written it's the one that you wrote the other day no no oh my god that was not about him oh my god that was just like a good poem like just inspired after I'm a poet guys no I like I clearly like had such like strong emotions for this person that like I yeah he like inspired a lot of creativity in me um and that's I think that like is a lot for me like I'm a really creative person but for someone to inspire me to do something that's pretty big yeah anyways um I I was really devastated when he told me that and I've had to like carry that knowledge with me and like work on that in therapy and like you know we've all experienced something where someone has said

something to us or treated us a certain way that has affected how we treat relationships down the line and this has really greatly impacted how I treat sex and how I feel about sex like there needs to be a lot of trust for me and um it's especially because like he betrayed that trust so much and um so after he listened he reached out to me and he was like well first he called me and I was getting the mail so I came back and I saw that he had called me and I missed it and I was freaking the fuck out I was like oh my god he listened to me talk about our sex life yeah like we haven't talked in six years and um I thought there was no fucking way he would listen to it so then I'm like freaking out to Amelia and um he then he dm'd me on Instagram after I didn't

answer the phone you know that he did that just so he knew if you saw it yeah probably so he dm'd me and he was like hey I want I wanted to let you know I listened to the podcast and was very flattered blah blah blah I'd love to catch up with you and I was like oh my god I totally didn't think that you'd listen to this and then I was like you know what I'll be like honest with you because we're probably never gonna see each other again like I was really devastated when you ended things because i remember specifically you saying that you were only with me because you enjoyed having sex with me and that was really hard for me to deal with and um like you know speak your truth guys like i don't need to protect anyone else's feelings no um especially like this is

something that i've had to cope with for a long time now yeah and it's affected how i treat sex even now um you're only responsible for your feelings if somebody's hurt in the process of you being honest with them about how you're feeling then that's yeah that's on them to work through well his actions made me feel that way so it's it's i'm allowed to own that experience totally so we i was like still i was like fine with like facetiming him um i did feel more like it was for him than for me you facetimed i thought you were just on the phone no we facetimed oh my god yeah he looks the same um but we facetimed and he was like honestly i mean i i've always like known how i dealt with things was was not great and like i know i hurt your

feelings um and yeah he's it's weird to me that he waited six years to talk about it or like he could like anytime he thought of me if that's how he had felt like felt guilty he still waited for me to like publicly address that like address his existence I get I don't know I don't even know how to phrase this like he's had six years to reach out to me and then I was like did you not think to let did you not think about like how I had felt or like how you had dealt with this situation until I was talking about it on a podcast and then he was like no I've always like felt bad i was talking to somebody about this the other day how like i feel like it's never i think men and women but in this in this situation men always know that they're that

they've wronged someone i think everybody has that level of awareness that they know that they've wronged someone but the difference is owning up to it isn't that an interesting phenomenon that's like everybody knows when they're doing something wrong but it's a different level of maturity to actually admit and apologize for the wrongdoings and people do not do that enough yeah like people people can't just own up to their mistakes and a lot of the time that's all that we need like we don't need you to right your wrongs we just need you to acknowledge that you hurt us and I think that a lot of people think that just not acknowledging the hurt makes it go away like well if I apologize then it's maybe they're not upset and it's going to point out

the fact that I did something wrong and so I just won't say something like there's I don't know what the line of thinking is but I'm always the first like I always want to squash a situation when I've upset someone and a lot of people don't have that and it's hard for me to fathom not wanting to just get rid of the like cloud hanging over everyone you know if he was feeling like that for six years yeah why not address it sooner don't you want to rid yourself of that bad energy and just be like I'm sorry that I hurt you and move on even if you weren't pressed about it which he knows that you were but even if you weren't shouldn't he want to just make sure that he like does the right thing and apologizes to you before he moves on with his life it's something that happens way too often

and it always like if they do if someone does apologize it's always because you have been the one to initiate it in some aspect but uh the my 0.5 update is so I haven't edited the third episode yet but I do talk a lot about my twitter bae and um it's been about a week since we recorded that episode and I've had a lot of time to like think about it and continue processing how it made me feel and I decided earlier today that I was just gonna share like how it made me feel when he ghosted me because you know I'm not trying to get anything out of him or out of the rest of this situation I think it's I've processed it enough to be like well that really fucking hurt my feelings and also like do I want to continue having a like a situationship with someone who

can't just like be honest with me I had texted him and said like I I was like I'm gonna talk to you about this before it like comes out in our podcast and considering like the guys who have reached out to us I want to address it to you if I'm gonna be so public about it I like I want you to know about it first so uh I said that I said that he hurt my feelings and then I also ended it kind of like yeah it was still fun like I still think like he's hot and like cool but I don't know it's it's been weird I know I think I said this to you before when we were talking about it but I think that it's so important in any situation to move forward knowing that you did everything that you could have done to the to the point of you feeling okay about where you leave the

situation yeah like you've like you did what you did you sent him a gift then you told him that like how how this is now like I'm okay with it and then he chose not to respond to that i gave him like two weeks two weeks yeah and then you could have just rolled over and been like okay like you win i guess we're just not gonna talk but instead you took the power back again and told him how you felt and how he hurt you and you ended it on a good note and if he doesn't respond to you that tells you so much about the type of person that he is not that he's like a bad person like it's not black and white like that but he's clearly immature he doesn't know how to handle basic human emotion he doesn't know how to be courteous and considerate with how you

are feeling about things of course the easiest thing to do is to ghost somebody of course but that's not the kindest thing to do it's not the most mature thing to do it's you you are you have no regard for how the other person is feeling when you decide just to be like well I'm just gonna walk away so I don't have to have a conversation about it like if that sucks that's not fair yeah well and i think like my my experience with father john frodo shows that you are always going to carry guilt about this like just address it yeah it's totally fine and like there's no shame in addressing it i don't know like if someone hurts your feelings like you're fucking allowed to tell them that yeah i mean that's that's your piece and like i and i'm

not blaming him as a person I don't think he's a bad person but like his actions hurt my feelings I think that he is without divulging too much information he's at like such a turning point in his life you and I have talked about this totally that's such a turning point when I think yeah so he's like like two and a half years younger than me or something um and I'm a pre I'm pretty realistic like I'm like okay you don't live anywhere near me um this is like mostly only sexual and that's perfectly fine with me like I have no intention of making this develop into something else um and also like you're at a fucking different time in your life even though it's only been I was his age two and a half years ago I that's not that long ago but you change so

much between then and now and I was just like the shit you're going through you need to like fucking experience that on your own like you have to go through your own shit you're you're 26 like I remember like when I was 26 again not that long ago but my life and my personality were so fucking different than they are now yeah like I'm sure it's such a time yeah figuring out who you are yeah yes like that that time span of like going between like 26 you're like realizing you what you thought you knew you wanted is completely different you're like oh fuck like i graduated and i thought like i was just gonna get a job in my field right away and that's never true no and no one prepares you for that no um and like the the emotional

roller coaster of that and like you're like starting and ending serious relationships you're figuring out who you really are and most importantly who you want to be and then you're like how the fuck do i become that person like that all really happens very heavily at 26 and 27 your life just changes so fucking much and like i'm in 28 yeah even 28 things are starting to settle down for me guys but not not completely i think they're still figuring it out the length of your 20s are the time god i'm like are they over yet i feel like i'm ready to be 35 i'm just like fuck all of this it's exhausting i keep thinking i know myself and then i don't which is a weird thing as a human to experience shouldn't we know ourselves the best and we do not

no i know 20s are a wild ride so i'm gonna read a story she sent me a picture of this guy too and he actually okay i'm gonna have to show it to you okay so this story says i went to a pool party with a friend and it was all her boyfriend's friends so i didn't know anyone i showed up and this guy started talking to me who had a mark under his nose it pretty much looked like he drew on a hitler mustache with a mark with marker as a joke i ignored it because he seemed like the kind of guy who wanted you to acknowledge it but uh because he thinks he's hilarious and i don't want to give him the satisfaction he started talking to me and was flirting a ton he was kind of a tool like i expected but i didn't mind the conversation some drunk guy at the pool walks

up to him and says dude you have something on your lip haha and hitler abruptly says it's a birthmark i was so glad i didn't ask about the stash since it wasn't a joke and clearly did not he clearly did not enjoy people noticing it he ended up getting my number from my friend and asked me to go on a date with him at that point in my life i was going on dates with anyone just to see who was fun what kind of guy i was looking for all that jazz he picks me up in a mustang another plus one for being a tool and we go we go to a sushi restaurant we sit down and he clearly doesn't know what to talk about because he ends up asking me if i like to cook and if i make chili he then goes on to ask me what my chili recipe is and then proceeds to explain each ingredient and each step

in his special chili recipe riveting hitler talked to me uh about chili for fucking 15 minutes i didn't kiss him at the end of the night and we never went out again lol fast forward six months and i start going to this climbing gym near my house guess who i see almost every time i go hitler i feel uncomfortable saying hitler so many times and he's gonna like appear in a mirror god i hope not anyways um almost every time i'm there he is there and every time he pretends he doesn't see me so we're doing the awkward dance of pretending we don't know each other and staying on opposite sides of the gym so yeah that was my time i went on a date with hitler and the mustache ended up not being the worst part about him wow that's saying something and then she signed it

with her real name because she like didn't care who knew um but she did send me a picture of this guy let me pull it up i'm so excited i think she sent it to me on instagram because i like i messaged her and i was like oh my god thank you for sharing this this is hilarious i feel so bad for him that he was given this mark under his nose i'm sure he is also disappointed i'm sure he is sherry's upset about it amelia put her hand over her mouth it's so much worse than i thought it was gonna be he has to there's options why didn't he grow his facial hair out grow your facial hair out or go get it like i would you guys it's so bad i would go under the knife to get it removed honestly yeah it's that is a full hitler stash like it's what is that is it a mole you guys

well if it's a birthmark it's probably just a discoloration he's really handsome otherwise that's really sad like because that's like a that's a plight like that you are that oh it makes sense why his conversation skills are off oh i'd be so aware that i have this thing like it it literally looks like a legit hitler and it's like it takes up so much it's like from like directly under his nose right to his lip and then like and then it's like the span of his nose too so it's it's it looks like it looks like he drew it on to look like hitler that's so sad poor guy that's not even something that could be like ha ha isn't that kind of funny it's not that's sad oh my god wow it's too bad that both hitler and charlie chaplin had the same facial hair

yeah because that is also a charlie chaplin mustache was charlie chaplin trying to look like hitler though no he just had that i think it was a look for the time um yeah i mean it's something that hillary was like can you imagine like taking like something fashionable of the time and becoming such an awful person that like no one will ever do that again killed the look yeah otherwise just wear a bowler hat all the time so then you just to lean into the charlotte like you can't wear like a constructed jacket at any point your options are to wear a bowler hat yeah or grow a beard okay well thanks for sharing your stories with us we love you so much what do we call them i think like the people that send in stories are the choir

the choir preaching to the choir preaching to the choir anyway love you bye bye that was my impression of our theme song