The Hoely Hour - YAPPY HOUR: Coldplay Is For Cheaters

Episode Date: July 25, 2025

E235: Is watching porn cheating, or is it just a solo side quest? Speaking of cheating...there's nothing quite like getting exposed for infidelity on a jumbotron while “Fix You” plays in the background, amirite? Amelia’s also on a GLP-1 now, so buckle up for her wellness era with significantly less appetite and significantly more opinions. And we read a listener email so heartfelt it made Liz cry. How dare you (we love you). Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See https://pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

all right you just missed a beautiful rendition of the intro song that I was singing before Liz hit record I'm just no just know that it was Simon Cowell would be proud um hey what were we what were we just talking about that you were like oh um the whole idea of like porn being cheating oh yeah yeah yeah yeah okay so we were having a conversation that you'll hear in a couple of weeks in a few weeks so we're all over the board yeah um no we were talking about uh someone i know like this was a very long time ago she walked in on her partner about to jork his peanuts to pornography frank has started to say jork his peanuts like because you say it love saying it we it's a regular phrase and in our house did you come up with it

no no i did not the first time i saw it was uh britney broski was saying it oh my it's so fucking jorking my peanuts or or maybe i saw it i don't know where i saw it but it was related to britney broski is her last name actually broski no oh i just thought about the fact that that's a wild last name to have like in a good way yeah i don't think it's her real ass name what's your real name and i just strip a name oh what is that make it rain on it like a windowpane lil wayne i could i should have known that those are some lil wayne ass rhymes i love him uh so okay i can't imagine walking in on somebody about to watch porn yeah what's what's the exchange like if i walked in on frank about to watch porn yeah um i would probably just turn on

a heel and pretend i didn't see it what and when you're imagining this how are you imagining walking in on him you know like what's the scenario bed yeah is he at his computer desk i don't i i mean in that specific scenario i was expecting it i was thinking of him at his desk because that's where he spends the day because he works down there yeah but i would first of all those stairs are so fucking loud going downstairs to his office so there's no way he wouldn't have heard me coming he'd be able to yeah tuck it away yeah tuck it into a pant leg little tuck yeah talking about his waistband yeah as one does um but i don't know i think i think honestly i would probably just turn on a heel what would you do i think it depends i think i'd be like oh

continue yeah i just have to tell you yeah i was just letting you know i'm going to the grocery store do you want anything have a good whack yeah i don't know if if they were watching porn i don't know how i'd feel but if they're just jerking it yeah i'd be like oh why what circle back do you just have because of how you feel about porn in general you need some help need a mouth yeah maybe how i feel about porn in general like i have such complicated feelings around porn which is something i never thought i would say yeah back in the day my and the complication of my feelings comes not from the porn itself but just now that I know what it does to people's brains and yeah like how people become addicted to porn and kind of seeing the fallout of how

it has negatively affected younger generations being able to see like really explicit pornography like how easy it is for them to become addicted to it how addicted they are to vaping and like how addictive like sports betting is I don't know there's just a lot of really like exploitative things and that like affect people's brains and I think porn is one of them but then I also want to be supportive of sex workers and it's just complicated it is complicated I do think that there is a way i think it's on the responsibility is on the consumer of the porn to a to a degree and the responsibility like is what about the responsibility of like young people who aren't old enough to technically be watching porn yeah i hadn't considered that yeah so that's more of

like what i'm thinking about yeah that does complicate things it's a very nuanced conversation yeah and yeah and it is very exploitative of the people who are sex workers like that's really complicated too and they don't have as many like legal rights surrounding their job the same way that like you do at a corporate job I just yeah I don't know and if like if your only options are poverty or sex work like is that fair no that shouldn't be your only two options to not right be in poverty like yeah yeah but that's the good thing about only fans is like it has made a lot of people very rich a lot of rich people who join it though are then like it has made a small percentage of people very rich but for most people it doesn't yield any results yeah you just never

the same way like an mlm is exploitative i don't know there's a lot of complicated complicated things like logistics and like emotional that i don't even know how to start to unpack but do what do you think about the concept of like porn as cheating i see i've never seen it as cheating but maybe that's because i've always watched porn in relationships so maybe it's just like i've just i think it depends on how you treat it like not you specifically but like yeah i guess how you feel about it and then how your partner treats porn yeah right if it's like they're watching porn uh like as a replacement for like your sexual relationship i could understand why that would be a feeling of betrayal yeah but i mean like that is kind of how like porn porn

addiction comes on like yeah you have a really inactive sex life because your porn addiction keeps you from being able to be sexually satisfied with your only intimate partner yeah and your brain cannot differentiate between like this is my real partner and this is what I'm observing in pornography yeah and then when you're watching when you have a porn addiction you are watching it all day usually oh I mean if it's pretty bad and you're you can click through whatever you want yeah you you can look you can have an idea and be like I wonder if this exists and find it yeah that's so true i wonder like just on like porn sites too like you can find porn anywhere now which is like crazy like like twitter yeah it's insanely unregulated like vehicle of delivering

porn to the world apparently a lot of people see like essentially pornography on tiktok and i'm like what i get a violation on my comment for calling a police officer a pig yeah what the fuck i said oink oink and they were like your comment violates our terms and conditions i'm like okay well i just saw someone's fucking labia yeah and i'm in trouble right get fucked yeah there's a tiktok is really like the whole thing that happened with um i think her name was ren oh yeah the little girl who's like mom was putting her in like like vaguely sexual situations knowing that there were like creeps saving the video and like doing things with the video it's why isn't that illegal yeah i mean like there are more and more regulations that are

popping up around like child safety but like not enough the way that these child safety laws are being written around regarding like content creation they're written in a way where it can also be used to limit people's freedom of speech yeah so it's kind of like a like when these laws are passed not they're not always written in good faith so it kind of sucks but in general like the laws regarding like child labor laws even in film should be treated the same way as content creation yeah like your kid is gonna get older they're gonna become an adult and be like all of this video of me is online and available without my consent yeah and these kids are starting to be they're getting old enough that they're able to talk about their experience

having a parent as a content creator yeah and how exploited they felt like and that's overwhelmingly what they say about it because if you think about it like a lot of people don't have the choice of if like they're they're viral or not like like a child they're not gonna have the choice to consent to being made into content right and normal people like us you know sure we have a podcast but we're not like famous yeah right we're not i'm not making a living off of podcasting yeah yeah this is like the whole thing that happened with ruby frankie um yeah i was thinking a lot about the eight passengers fame um and like in the documentary her kids were like it started out being fun and then it turned into like a this was making them family money and we had to like film

and if I didn't say what she wanted me to say it like turned into a whole thing of like me being yelled at and me being punished and then it just like snowballed from there and it's it's like having your child be I mean there's a lot of shit going on with Ruby Frankie that was you know separate from the YouTube of it all but like having your relationship with your family be like how you get money there's no way that that can end well I'm thinking about what how we got here though I'm thinking about the initial question of like is watching porn cheating and I think ultimately I'd land on no yeah um but it would definitely need to be something that warrants like a conversation with your partner totally I think now like people's perception and

understanding and interactions with porn have changed a lot in the last five years especially so i think it's worth talking about like how do you treat porn how do you interact with it does it affect your like romantic relationships or sexual relationships yeah like these fucking an 18 year old boys should not be needing viagra no like yeah yeah it should be we should look at if there's an addiction happening absolutely so that's more of how i i see it period um someone dm'd me about this is culturally relevant someone dm'd me and said we should talk about this on the podcast the cold play couple oh my god so if you have been living under a rock or if you're listening to this in the future and you don't remember this moment um and this is such a like

i feel like we're gonna forget about this in like a week this couple was seen at a cold play concert um they were put on the like screen almost like a kiss cam and um the man was kind of like holding the woman from behind and they're swaying and they both react like they don't want to be seen the absolute worst way they could have reacted yeah yeah the woman like turns around tries to hide her face like is very reactive and then the man just slowly sinks so he's no longer visible in the camera and then the singer was like oh they're either having an affair or they're just very shy yep because what else are you gonna do that's really funny yeah and apparently this is this is just what I've read I don't know if this actually happened but anytime they showed another

camp another couple on the screen um he would ask if they were having an affair if they're a real couple that's so funny um there were definitely some funny tweets to come out of it but I think that this is gonna be Liz's hot take okay I'm sorry and maybe it's maybe it's too woke which I don't think is a real thing I don't think you could be too woke maybe it is a little too woke but I I think that the way that the general public reacted was a little bit annoying like the way that people were like freaking the fuck out about it I'm like these aren't this is the most exciting thing to happen to a b2b sass data company since the beginning of time yeah like what a boring industry to be working in this is the most exciting thing that's ever happened to a b2b company yeah

a b2b tech company like and i i think that people like treating them like these these are not pop culture icons. These are not people that the world knows. Like they're just two people that work at a tech company. And I also think the overwhelming criticism of the woman involved was so like critical and horrible. And like they're just a couple having an affair. They didn't fucking invent cheating you know like yeah it sucks but it's also none of your business yeah do you know how many people are cheating on their spouse every day i don't think that this straight couple is that special i didn't realize that people were like pressed about it oh yeah they're like dming his wife and her husband and the company i'm like you don't work there like it

just was so parasocial and I also think like I saw so much more criticism of the woman so if you don't know the man is like the CEO of this company um called astronomer astronomer and yeah it's a b2b like data visualization company and if you've tuned out I totally get it um and he was also on the board of directors i don't know if people like saw that but like not only is he the ceo he's on the board of directors so this man has an absurd amount of power and control and sway in this presumably profitable company and business to business companies typically make way more money than a regular company um because businesses have a lot of money to spend yeah um there's also not a ton of b2b companies so they can yeah there's not a lot of premium

um and then the woman who was involved in this affair is the head of people or something like that yeah yeah which is essentially yeah comes to the head of hr oh she's chief of people okay um so essentially yeah in charge of the hr portion which is hilarious yeah having someone who is the head of HR having an affair with the CEO and someone who is on the board of directors is a pretty big conflict of interest but people are criticizing how she looks they're like I saw a lot more around her specifically trending on Twitter of course it was in three spots I was like this is insane and i just think like it seems like another kind of like misogyny slop moment to me like oh who in the public eye like what woman can we hate now yeah like we saw it with

amber heard we we've seen it with blake lively we have seen it with um hayley bieber like yeah it's just what woman in controversy can we hate now the most yeah and I don't know I something that I think is like a little like it is it was still present in the Diddy case but like you didn't have as many people like criticizing Cassie because I think that the video of Sean Combs aka p diddy like violently assaulting cassie did you see that yes like it's undeniable yes so you don't have as many people jumping onto this hate train of like you know blake lively and amber heard and making it this big spectacle because there wasn't like this physical evidence of watching this woman and get the shit beat out of her yeah i watched the fall of farve documentary last night have you

seen no what's up it's uh it's about brett farve who was the quarterback for the packers and he was married um is married still to the same woman and started brett farve a welfare queen yeah wait what you knew about his whole welfare thing um i've heard a little bit about it but keep going um oh this was a this was a separate piece of oh okay this was the majority of the documentary was about um there was a sideline intern who was like stunning like she was like in maxim and like playboy and all of that for just like being a hot girl at college you know it was like one of those things she like got like shown on like game day during one of her college games and like it her career took off from there and so she was like she was working as a sideline

reporter and somebody came up to her and they were like what would you do if Brett Favre asked for your number and she was like I would not give it to him like I look a lot like his wife and like I really like my job so I'm not going to do that and this is when he was on the jets and um he ended up finding her email and emailing her from like two separate email accounts that were very clearly him and just started harassing her like texting her all the time calling her um saying like i'm gonna send a car to come pick you up ended up sending her a dick pic like out of nowhere they had never met oh my god they never met in person and she was like talking about this with the guy who started the editor-in-chief of deadspin do you remember deadspin it was like pre-barstool yeah um

she was talking to him about it like just like as co-workers do and he like off the record and he was like well i'm going to share this story and holy shit yeah and you can't do anything about it and aired it out and she ended up getting fucking dragged and he got nothing for it for being the one to harass this young woman send her like explicit photos you know without any sort of reason to think that that was something that she would want to receive from him yeah that's sexual harassment and two other girls came out and did the same thing like said the same thing that he did to them and nothing happened to him he like went on to have this like illustrious he like ended up being um the quarterback of like you know other teams he like went to the vikings

after that it just he nothing happened to him and her life was ruined for being on the receiving end of it which i was just thinking about like i mean that's kind of like monica lewinsky in the Clintons yeah that's the thing that's the same thing with this astronomer CEO it's like why he's in the position of power yeah I don't think enough people are like acknowledging that like yeah she was a c-suite executive but how much more power he had like it's an inappropriate relationship and I'm obviously it was consensual but like you do need to consider the power dynamic of that what's happening yeah yeah and of course nobody does also like swerve this is a little bit less serious of a thing about this whole thing but like what happened to cheating in private

yeah ultimately too i think my my conclusion besides like i think the public reaction was a little obnoxious because it was so much i'm like who fucking cares about these people yeah i don't know them i don't care about their affair but my ultimate takeaway is like if you're doing something shady and you're cheating you're gonna get caught yeah at some point right you're gonna get found out yeah this is just to me it's just like divine intervention is a thing it's just insane like to be the ceo of a company you must know a lot of people so like to be so yeah like very bold yeah about just like you know holding this woman that's clearly not your wife in public at a concert like the odds of somebody seeing you that knows you is already so high and then the

jumbotron obviously like you know blew that up but it doesn't make any sense what the fuck they were thinking you know like of course i think they it had never crossed their mind what would we do if we got caught yeah i mean that is a very public way to be caught yeah um and i definitely feel bad for their like respective families yeah um that is very embarrassing but like the public reaction to it also made it so much harder for the people who are kind of like the victims of this scandal totally but you know i'm surprised that there are so many you were seeing so many people pressed because i was seeing so many people like loving this you know like i saw somebody post more of what i mean loving it in a way that i think is like obnoxious right but i

mean like there was like posts like every year there's a ceo sacrifice oh yeah i did see that one that one was funny like the submarine the um submarine submergible or sub submerge i don't know um luigi and and this like it really brings people together like there was all these um that is true but like i guess i didn't see as much celebration of like this ceo's life blowing up and i saw more criticism of how this woman looks it's like that's so fucked up like and from other women too some of it was like i would be i wouldn't even be as embarrassed as the about the cheating scandal as i would about my gray roots growing in she should have gotten her hair touched up before doing this like what yeah bullshit like that and then like luckily there are comments

that are like your internalized misogyny is way worse than this woman having an affair like absolutely it's embarrassing disgusting and then another one was like this man lost potentially like half his fortune and his family and his wife just for a woman who looks like this and it's like a unflattering screenshot of honestly an objectively attractive person yeah but like she's not the issue why are you criticizing this regular woman's looks yeah like sure she's the other woman in an affair but also like i i'm sorry i don't think that's that special no i don't think so either people fucking cheat yeah all the time right and it is fucked up but also like they what if they didn't want people to know not because they were having an affair but because

like they're they work together at a company i can totally understand being like yeah we don't want people to know that we're seeing each other yeah like sure it certainly didn't end that way right i do think that there's like i think people have affairs at work because there's that added aspect of like nobody can know about this and nobody can know about this you know it's like you you have like the one-two punch of like i'm having an affair and like i shouldn't be dating someone at work yeah so it's like exciting in that way um they're spending a lot of time together i saw uh somebody there was a one of those like betting apps like posting about people betting on whether or not he was going to resign and like the like entry was like up to like four thousand

dollars he's still gonna be on the fucking board yeah probably rich people are gonna ranch yeah and now the the longer you work in a corporate environment the closer you do get to meeting like executives and it totally depends on like the company too if it's like smaller and just i was thinking i was trying to apply like what would happen at my company if like two of the executives we knew like if this happened at my company like it would i'm sure all hell broke loose i feel so bad for their social media manager just i because i can guarantee it's probably just one person yeah and they're just like uh so i made a key i made a tag to track the keywords about you guys having an affair and they probably didn't even have a pr team before this they probably had to

outsource a pr team like yeah i'm sure their pr team was like two people yeah right just knowing how like sparse like a b2b marketing team is like yeah you guys uh must have had a really fucking crazy time i do think that this whole thing could have been avoided if they did not react the way that they did absolutely i think absolutely like you don't know like it's it's hard to know what you're going to do in a situation like that that's why you need to Think of all worst case scenarios. Yeah. They got too cocky with their affair.

Just like pretend to give her the Heimlich. Yeah. Or, you know, like hug her. You're like, oh, this is my bud. Like there's so many ways to avoid this whole fallout. Well, yeah. Like you're saying, like no one would have seen it. Yeah.

If they hadn't reacted crazily. Right. Because it is funny when you're watching it and you're like, oh, why don't they want to be seen? Are they having an affair? or like maybe their relationship is secret for some reason whatever yeah so I did see some pretty funny tweets as a result one of them was like the other guy cheating at a the Coldplay concert phew that's funny oh man yeah and I did see someone say like this is the whitest thing that's ever happened and i totally that's so real and it made me think of our first episode that we

recorded hashtag cold play cry oh my god the cold play crying to cold play is gonna mean something different forever absolutely whenever i think about my cheating ex i'm gonna put on some cold play it really it's it's it's cheating music now yellow was it what does that even mean it was all yellow i don't know i i need to listen to the song again maybe that's what i'll do on my drive home i don't think it makes sense like i think that it's like coldplay has some bops they really do the scientists really do phenomenal song and it's reminding me of my old ipod my ipod video which i would sometimes so i had a bunch of illegally downloaded videos including many seasons of family guy and south park and in the

middle of class i would just start watching family guy south park um i also had like all of dane cook's stand-up oh my god and all of one of dave chapelle's stand-up sets wow it was quite a time to be alive i miss old media oh my god it was so exciting to have something like an ipod video stole my ipod what the fuck tragic bitch ass we should go full john wick to figure out who it was he went through my bag and someone was like oh yeah this kid was going through people's bags and just taking stuff and i was like you just fucking stood there where was your bag it was whoever told you it was yeah it was like in a class where we had to like set our bags up against the side of the wall because it was in the auditorium so we all set our bags down you know

and i'm like you fucking accomplice bitch yeah you didn't say anything you just let this motherfucker steal my ipod all you can hope for is karma being one time someone stole my phone and they texted my mom some mean stuff what the fuck yeah my mom was like hey i saw that um you did like you got a i didn't get a good grade on something and it was also added incorrectly but she's like i saw that you didn't get a good grade on this thing is there anything i can do to help and they texted back do my homework bitch and what a heinous use of honestly the kids in las vegas fucking suck that doesn't surprise me shitty kids even the mormon ones so especially the mormon ones yeah just kidding and i wish that i knew who those two kids were because i would

literally physically assault them even now as a 30 year old adult woman yeah i would assault you easily would punch you in the face yeah and it would probably do them a favor i think more kids should have been punched in the face yeah by grown adults yeah or by other kids you know like there needs to be more like prison justice but in elementary schools i should have i didn't i don't think I uh had it in me to do any prison justice yeah no me neither I still don't I think if I could go back in time and give my younger self advice I don't know I would give myself some advice to be a little bit more scrappy because I have always given off the air of being scrappy but now I think I have that dog in me I didn't always have that dog in me that's interesting

they were kind of always like like priming the canvas for it though you know to one day have that dog in me yeah um paulie's like huh oh baby um i also think i i i the advice that i would give to like younger women dating i i would say like don't ever post a man on your social media until you're married yeah like no I'm not gonna tell the world about you I'm saving myself to marriage yeah I'm saving my I'm saving the grid for marriage yeah um and that's like no shade to Mr. Liz I just like that's just the perspective I have now where I'm like well I don't think any because I think that girls and women are more likely to change their lives around like the man that they're dating if they're in like a heterosexual relationship they're just more

likely to compromise and make themselves smaller to make a relationship work and I just think that that's not worth it it's just like no I come first and then our relationship comes second yeah but I do feel like there are relationships that like you know there are men that allow their their partner to thrive in a way that they don't have to sacrifice themselves yeah Yeah. I just think like, you know, don't get ahead of yourself. Don't get too excited. Yeah.

Because then you have to go through and do all the deleting. Make them work for it. Yeah. Yeah. Then you have to delete stuff. Archive stuff. It's better to just not even post them. The amount of shit that I had to archive.

It's very profitable to pretend to be single as well. Oh, my God. Absolutely. So. That's good advice. Mm-hmm. Pretend you're single. Get your bag.

Yeah. If you're a man, pretend you're married and have kids because you'll get paid more. and get a lot of attention from women i mean that sincerely yeah changing topics i started okay i started taking a glp-1 if you don't know what that is ozempic but it's not ozempic it's the it's the um drug that's in ozempic that i'm taking semaglutide is what it's called because um i have we've there's some anecdotal evidence that it helps with lipoedema so i'm microdosing it which is i mean we'll see if it does anything but this shit fucking rocks your system like i believe it yeah tell me how you feel oh my god sorry i didn't react on mike but i already knew

this yeah no this wasn't news to me yeah um i the day after so apparently day two is always the worst day um and i kind of like a period yeah i found the end hangovers and exercising why is that it's always it's always day two yeah i don't know because maybe because your body can't get it's like especially in recovery mode i have no idea who knows yeah that's a really good question yeah scientists if you're listening to this let us know why does the second day of everything suck more hit our line we want to know um but it is it's nauseating like and i'm only taking a small amount yeah um I have heard that I haven't and it's not entirely surprising because it's an appetite suppressant and it's also like it slows down your digestion so like you get you stay full

for longer but like I don't eat a lot of protein as is and apparently protein is like king when you're taking these things so I've just been like I've been housing peanut butter um but like I haven't weighed myself I had to weigh myself for the first time in like five years because like I needed to like know my starving weight yeah and that wasn't great like that sucked because I'm not in a like whenever I go to the doctor and they weigh me I tell them not to tell me um because I just it's just not good for my mental which has been really interesting I've actually talked to my therapist about a lot of like being somebody who has struggled from an eating disorder and being on a GLP-1 is like you're not supposed to do it but I'm taking such a small amount that it's

like and I mean I think it's also important that like you're not taking it because you're like I must be thin yeah it's like for medical purposes right which is it like that's the drug's intent totally it's like your mobility is being affected by a condition you don't have any control over right so yeah totally this is something that is like experimental and you're gonna see if it works yeah and I'm going low and slow and it's just it's tough because it's like the weight loss will be in an effect of it and I just like I'm very like acutely aware of it being like addictive in that sense like oh my god I've like lost five pounds in like two weeks like I'm gonna do this for forever and I don't want it to become that because that's not what it's

about like you said like it's about this problem that i have that has been like i can't get help for i'm still waiting to hear back from uw surgery for after two months to try to get it managed and so i've just like i'm trying to figure out different avenues i have been thinking about this a lot especially lately like with ozempic glp ones in particular like i there is so much judgment that people pass on other people taking GLP-1s yeah but like even if they are taking it explicitly for weight loss like that is the society that we have built and have to exist in yeah and why would you fault someone for wanting to comfortably exist in that world yeah and like there are no rewards for doing it the hard way no like no one's gonna give you a gold medal

yeah for losing weight the old-fashioned way because not ever not all bodies are made the same first of all yeah and like I don't know it's just such a complicated like people choose to do whatever they want to their body for different reasons and sometimes that's none of your fucking business absolutely and at the end of the day like yeah you're not gonna get a fucking award for like doing it the crazy way or the hard way right whatever like that's it's people just it's we say this like every episode there's nobody's leaving room for any nuance in these conversations like there have been like for me speaking from my own experience I can say that there are like there are people that aren't able to be effective in the gym because of what their body is doing to

them like I haven't been able to do a leg day which without like feeling I'm gonna throw up from pain yeah and I thought that that was normal like I thought that people just like leg day sucks like that for everyone and it's not the case and like so it's tough for me and I'm sure a lot of people that have like different things going on with their mobility as it like as a result of like different weight accumulation that like need to rely on something like a GLP-1 to like be able to take care of themselves better but people don't think about you like that they're just like oh you didn't try hard enough well and there's also like this kind of like perspective from like we do see all of these celebrities taking ozempic simply to be very thin we see them get

facelifts and everybody claps like yeah uh sure none of us want to exist in this world but like like in the the these unreal beauty expectation standards like i know that the substance was supposed to be a commentary on this but like it's it's fucking true like you want everyone to just be immune to existing in a world that has set these beauty standards and i think the more and more conservative culture becomes like the more those are the expectations and i think it ebbs and flows like we definitely see it swing back and forth like we did have a stretch of our like late teens to 20s where things were a lot more inclusive and um it was just a more accepting culture to be part of and then the reaction to that is like ultra conservative um and i mean

there are still a lot of flaws in like america we don't have nearly as social like we don't have nearly as many social resources as other like developed countries yeah that we should have and um yeah the reaction to perceived like social uh support and systems is to become ultra conservative so the beauty standards and expectations are really absurd and a lot of like a lot more conservative clothing it's just very interesting to watch culture be at the time like yeah exist how it is right now it feels almost like a balloon that's about to pop yeah and i mean i hope so it'll be interesting because like it no it feels like it happened really fast that it turned so conservative um it did and i and i think there are a ton of factors at play

in that like i don't think it was just the trump the first trump presidency like i think compounding a global pandemic which no one alive today has lived through before like that has that's going to have incredible long-term effects that we haven't even seen finish playing out yet yeah so i think that compounded on top of like a trump presidency the first the first term um and then like even with joe biden like even when he went went into office after the trump presidency he was still incredibly conservative um compared to past presidencies even even republican presidencies like he still was incredibly conservative and the government collectively did a lot to stomp out some of the social services that we like we got to

see and experience what life could be like with more social support like we did do there were a lot of really great services available to people during the pandemic to try and help support them yeah and those were ripped away and made even worse than before the pandemic um under the joe biden presidency so i don't know like collectively the government i just have a tinfoil hat on right now but i just like i'm like yeah they don't really give a shit about anybody and i do think like a lot of young um liberal people are trying to get the old guard out of absolutely democrat uh yeah the democratic party because they're not doing anything it's just it's because i mean it's all performance liberal politicians have

no spine i know i said this last week like when we were talking about uh jasmine crockett crockett i don't i always i know so many people named jasmine that i always throw their last name into it whenever i think about jasmine crockett jasmine crockett like she is the one person that's like really and i i think aoc more and more now too i don't know aoc recently voted to uh continue supporting aid to israel so fucker i didn't know that yeah it was trending today i know well kind of a psyop i do but like just sucks just in terms of like not worrying about hurting people's feelings like i think liberals like i i feel very proud to be like identify with a party that cares about what how other people feel and also like the amount that

liberals worry about hurting other people's feelings contributes to why we lose so often like we're just worried about shit that is that needs to come secondary to like the welfare of is like not being too inflammatory yes like that's why you see them being like i have a glock um yeah and shit like that and acting like essentially republicans because they're not appealing to what people actually want in any capacity their solution is like oh we should go on more podcasts and not like yeah oh we should address the things that our constituents won't shut the fuck up about and keep criticizing us about publicly yeah like i don't know whatever i i do think that like there are a lot of like liberal content creators are taking the reins i

think on calling things out like for what they are like philip defranco does a really good job at this where he's just like this is bullshit what you're doing is bullshit this is fucking stupid and i don't think that we saw enough of that until recently i saw somebody i don't know who he is i want to assume he's republican because he had an american flag behind him in his video um which feels like a dog whistle at this point but it's so sad it's so sad that the american flag feels like a dog whistle but he was showing clips of trump on different interviews talking about young women um and like how he talks about his own daughter like the shit that he said about ivanka like he's also there was an interview where somebody um wendy williams asked what him and

his daughter have in common and her answer was like real estate and golf like we both love real estate and golf and then wendy williams was like what about you donald and he was like well i was gonna say sex and the audience was like oh but it's like what do you mean by that yeah and like what do you mean by that we why why didn't i know about that clip until yesterday you know like there's just we're we need to call these people fucking weirdos that's tim walls was like at the on the forefront of this you know like these people are fucking weird files what'd you say or pedophiles i think that uh the right has like bastardized so many important terms including being like calling people pedophiles yes like yeah yes i don't know pizza gate was really like

oh yeah i just learned about that really yeah that was a that was a weird time um i thought it would be fun to read a listener email that we got it literally made me cry so i want to preemptively thank this listener for writing this email because it was so thoughtful so someone wrote into the podcast um the title is sexomnia and growing with the pod hey girlies i'm a little behind in the podcast at the moment so if you do choose to read this on the pod I probably won't hear it for a while but it'll be a fun surprise if you do I recently listened to the episode where you talked about sexual disorders when I heard about sexsomnia I was shocked because I didn't really think it was an actual thing you see my boyfriend

has some trouble getting hard and maintaining an erection sometimes due to him taking SSRIs even though he's been off of them for over a year now sometimes after we begin having sex but but are unable to continue will be in bed for the night and he'll come on to me in his sleep it has only happened a handful of times in the year we've been together but he's given me the go-ahead to reciprocate if i want to as he usually wakes up pretty quickly sorry i should i don't know if i should be laughing i think that's kind of funny no i think it's funny too it's like if he's like if he's like clearly they had a conversation where she's like hey uh so you're when you're sleeping you start to do stuff you know what should i do yeah and then it's like

you know wake me up and say i don't want this or you know if you're into it then yeah why not train you know i think i would say the same thing yeah me too um anyway i just wanted to share this with his consent because i thought it was pretty interesting and didn't know it was an actual thing i also think that's really interesting hearing a first-hand account is fascinating I also just recently listened to your 200th slash 201st episode where you were commenting on how much your lives have changed and you were wondering how ours have changed too and mine absolutely has changed so much I first found this podcast via Amelia's TikTok and randomly decided to give it a listen I think you were still under the 50 episode mark when I first started listening but

I did start from the beginning and caught up pretty quickly at the time I must have been around 15 or 16 and I was sexually active at the time. I have to say I am eternally grateful for this podcast for teaching me so much, particularly about consent and being comfortable with both myself and my partner. I don't think I would be the person I am today without you two. I am now going into my third year of university and listening to that episode really put into perspective how much I've grown. It also highlighted the incredibly positive effect the podcast has had on my development i'm now studying psychology and hope to potentially one day become a sex therapist or in general just help women similarly to how this podcast has helped me

so the absolute biggest thank you to you guys i'll remain a loyal listener until the day you decide to stop recording which i'm hoping is a while from now just wanted to share in case you ever doubt how much you mean to a lot of us have a lovely day and apologize apologies for any spelling slash grammar mistakes sincerely and almost day one listener i i started reading this and then i paused and i was like i asked mr liz if i could read it to him and then as i was reading it to him i started crying oh and he's like he's like see cutie it is so important that you are doing this podcast because sometimes I feel like like I'm like is anyone listening like I don't know yeah obviously we enjoy doing it right the last time that we got a message that felt like

this was a time that like you and I had literally just finished a conversation being like what the fuck are we doing yeah and now we're about to I don't know if we've like really said this but we're about to take a few months off yeah and it's not even like a few months and you guys won't even be able to tell yeah um because we're still going to be introducing weekly episodes some of them will just be um recapping like our top performing episodes we have a few pre-recorded ones that will also be going live and it's just so we can take a creative break because we haven't like sure we've taken maybe a month off yeah um max yeah but we've never really taken a an extended break and we've been talking the last five years that we've been doing this right which is insane yeah

and like we've been talking for a while now about giving the podcast a facelift and like we like have like mood boards and like inspiration boards like set up of like what we've wanted to do and we just haven't had the time to do it so that's what this is but i bring this up to say a we haven't said that yet so that's probably a good segue and b like i've said this in the past but like we get these emails from y'all when we really need to see them and like i don't know about you but i really needed that email when we got it because it was like you know like you were the one that was like encouraging us to take a break which is a great idea and i'm totally on board but at the time i was like what do you mean i don't know like what if like what what if we don't come

back like what if you know like what if people stop listening what if nobody's listening to begin with you know and then we got this email and I was like this is why we do it like and we love doing it I I just it's crazy to me that a like 15 slash 16 year old was listening to our not safe for work podcast like for in my mind I'm like yeah a teenager would never fucking listen right yeah but I mean now this this girl's in her third year of of college yeah studying to become a psychologist yeah yeah uh did I did I remember that sex therapist yeah sex therapist oh did it stop recording of course it did just for old time's sake or the camera used to have that issue a lot yeah um but anyway thank you so much for writing thank you for sharing that

we also got another like fun email so we'll have to save that for later when's later who's to say yeah well maybe i'll read it when i'm recording by myself cool all right well you want to play us out more than anything i want to play us out we love you our children thank you farewell Thank you.