The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - 325: Thomas Araujo and the Brother-Cousin-Uncle Confusion

Episode Date: March 17, 2025

My HoneyDew this week is Thomas Araujo, aka Dope as Yola! Thomas joins me in the studio to Highlight the Lowlights of a friend's wild family entanglement that he's been dealing with for the past couple of years. He dives into the betrayal, how everyone is still involved despite the chaos, and how the family dynamics have left everyone wondering if things will ever return to normal. Thomas also reflects on his own relationship with his biological father and stepdad. CATCH ME ON TOUR https://www.ryansickler.com/tour Nashville, TN - March 28-29 Madison, WI - April 12th (Special Taping) SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://youtube.com/@rsickler SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON - The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! Get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! AND we just added a second tier. For a total of $8/month, you get everything from the first tier, PLUS The Wayback a day early, ad-free AND censor free AND extra bonus content you won't see anywhere else! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew What’s your story?? Submit at [e-mail] Get Your HoneyDew Gear Today! https://shop.ryansickler.com/ Ringtones Are Available Now! https://www.apple.com/itunes/ http://ryansickler.com/ https://thehoneydewpodcast.com/ SUBSCRIBE TO THE CRABFEAST PODCAST https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crabfeast-with-ryan-sickler-and-jay-larson/id1452403187 SPONSORS: BetterHelp -The HoneyDew is sponsored by BetterHelp, get 10% off your first month at https://www.Betterhelp.com/HONEYDEW The Farmer Dog -Get 50% off your first box of fresh, healthy food at https://www.TheFarmersDog.com/HONEYDEW

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please contact Connex Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor, free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. I'm headed back to Zanies in Nashville. Friday March 28th and Saturday March 29th Madison, Wisconsin. I'm excited to announce I'm shooting my next special at your club comedy on state I was there not too long ago had such a great time such a great club That I'm excited to work with them and bring you my next special two shows Saturday April 12th. Get your tickets now at RyanSickler.com. The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler.

Welcome back to the Honeydew y'all. We're over here doing it in the night pan studios. I'm Ryan sickler. You know where to find me. I just want to say thank you. Thank you for supporting anything I do, especially this show. If you love it, drop a comment, help that algorithm out. And if you've got to have more than you got to have the Patreon, it is called the honey do with y'all and it is this show with you all.

And I promise you, you're not hearing stories like this anywhere else. It's five bucks a month. And we've added a new tier to the Patreon where you get the way back a day early as well. Ad free, no censorship, all that stuff. And also bonus content. You're not getting anywhere else. All right. That's the biz.

You guys know what we're doing over here. I always say we highlight the low lights and these are the stories behind the storytellers. I'm very excited to have this guest back on the Honeydew. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Thomas Iraq. Yeah, welcome back to the Honeydew Thomas Iraq. I like the clap, the slow clap. Yeah, bro.

You look sober as you can be. We like to clap you in, man. Yeah, thanks for having me, dude. Thank you for being back. Before we jump into what we're going to talk about, plug anything you'd like, please. Every Tuesday, 1230, the Dope as Usual podcast. Check it out.

We're on all platforms. It's just Marty and I, and we interview some awesome people. And I can say the teacher's not in the room when it's just me and him. There's no guests. Like when the teacher just steps out for a second, do terrible things. So that's why we're censored a lot.

But yeah, come check us out. We have the more stuff I could, oh, it's now in Zoomies now, our clothing company. Is that right? Yeah, we're Zoomies now. Yeah, dude. Oh, dude, that's a big deal. Yes, I'm really excited.

We're doing great. We're doing great. And that's like, that's a new thing. I haven't seen you in a minute in a while. Yeah, that's great, dude. Yeah, dude. And then the dopest shop, the one we did the photo shoot with, doing great. And that's like, that's a new thing. I haven't seen you in a minute in a minute in a while. Yeah, that's great, dude. Yeah, dude. And then the dopest shop, the one we did the photo shoot with doing insane. I think we're like number four in the world right now. It's incredible. That's good for you, dude.

Yeah, dude. Other than that, I've just been burnt. Basically, Spicoli's life in mix with doing business stuff. That's my life now. If you haven't seen Thomas's earlier episodes, raised by a white man, stepfather. Partially, yeah. Partially, who was an off and on inmate. Yes. But mostly, mostly on. Mostly on.

And back on, actually. And back on right now. Yeah, he is, he is. White man who, in prison, what, he is. White man who in prison. What is was Nazi fair? We got to be honest man. That all yeah. Sensor that it's the tattoos.

It's the tattoos that were so confusing, but like yeah, white is right all the way down his body. You know, like so very white will say in prison. Very pro white. He's like a Ned Flanders with no shirt covered in racial things. Is that really what he is? Is his demeanor like softer? Like you would never. He's a super nice guy, but he looks very like with a mustache. He got the little like, if Freddie Mercury was American look, like he just looks like you're a little feminine,

but then takes his shirt off and like, oh, we got lightning bolts everywhere and Vikings and Jesus Christ. I see. He was the man. Other than that, he was very cool, very nice person. And he was a- Different man outside the penitentiary. Yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

We talked about, I used to go there and it was very different until he got to us. I'm like, all right, now that's the guy I know. And then back to Stoneface. And you still don't speak Spanish? No, I know some words because of him. He's fluent, man, which is the best part about the whole story.

That's the best part of all of that. Because until I said it here, I didn't realize how ridiculous it really is. It's insane. No, it really is stupid. It's dumb if you think about it like, you got the past, you just got the past, I'm your son.

I also see how useful that would be in something like prison though, too, no matter what you're wearing. If you could talk to everybody, or hear and understand. Yeah. Oh yeah. We met the flea market. He would be talking in Spanish to the fools at the flea market. What the fuck? And so did I. So yeah, So yeah, I don't know what's up with him. I don't talk to him anymore. But yeah, he kind of raised me a little bit. He tried.

So you got a while past. Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of stuff that happened that I think is funny to me and said it out loud. You're like, that's not normal. I know it's not normal, but it's pretty funny. That's how we deal with everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because I didn't realize that not everybody gets beat up. Like, it's children and stuff I didn't realize that like, not everybody gets beat up,

like it's children and stuff. You know what I mean? Not everybody gets... But when you go through it, you think it's just normal. And then you start telling people like, what happened to you? You're like, wait, what? Like anybody outside where you're from, you're like, you have both... PTA? Your parents went to PTA? This is incredible. The first time I saw like a stable home was kind of made me kind of sad like is this your life? I'm fucking this was it. What was it was that a sleepover? Yes. I went to a sleepover and I was like You have a lot of different get more than one soda here. This is crazy I mean, I mean like the same way I'm watching shit like y'all are getting hugs

same way. I'm watching shit like y'all are getting hugs. You know what I mean? Wait, not constantly. Somebody came in your room and said, I love you. Really? And not just came in like shut up. Or trying to beat the shit out of you. Oh God. I just remember my mom came in the room. My mom was dropping elbows man. What are you talking about? Oh yeah. She said, she. I'm covering up when that door opens up and she's like, I love you. And I'm like, what is that? It's a trick. It's dead. You sold me. It's finally happened. She used to tell me, I'm going to give you away

if you're bad here. I'm going to have the cops come get you and you're going to go to a foster home. Oh, I used to get threatened with foster home, dude. Oh, I remember she told me that we're going into a party. When have we ever been bad? What's wrong with you? All the time, they're're gonna come take you away.

I was in, this one's burned in my memory. It's fourth grade. My mom and dad are splitting. My mom had cheated on my dad, but it's an ugly thing. They're finally gonna go separate ways. And my mom was just an evil person. And she would say shit like that. And we're just little kids like,

what's gonna happen to us? She's like, I don't know, you might have to go to foster home. We're like, what? I mean it. Oh man, who knows? Who knows? My dad would have never let that shit happen.

But my mom's using that power, terror, anger, you know, all this. And then we're just like, the three of us are like, you know, you two are having problems. Why are we going to fall? I'm outside. We had a basketball hoop right here. My mom and dad's bedroom windows right here. And I'm in a driveway shooting hoops fourth grade with the neighbor across the

street. And I'm just talking. I'm just like, yeah, man, my mom just told us we might have to go to a foster home. He's like, what? And we're both freaking out. And my mom, it's summer, the window's open. My mom hears it, calls me inside, beat the shit out of me, dude. I was like, you know what? That foster home might be an all right idea.

So she beat you, don't be telling the truth. That's what she did. Beat me for telling people what she said to us. Like, oh, incredible. I bet you're not supposed to say this out loud. Your mom sounds very logical. So what happened? That was it?

I don't know. They split and everything. And no, I know. I'm talking about that day. She just beat the shed. You go back outside. That was the end of my play. No, I don't know.

I was on the bench after that, man. I was like, up to her. Second stringed. There's like of my playing. No, I don't know. I was on the bench after that, man. I was like, I'm to her. I'm to her. Second stringed. There's like two kids playing? Yeah, no. I just, I didn't realize. That's all.

Well, you also have a wild upbringing. I have your list here. Oh, you're talking about that. Tell me this story right now that's going on in your world. Okay, so I'm just gonna say it because I've been dealing with it because it's almost like a family member because you know when you have a friend,

you're like, hey, this is your uncle so and so. If you have kids, I don't have kids, so I'm trying to use an example like that. Like we're, I know his mom and his dad, they know every, we're intermingled as friends, right? Since, for 20 years almost. So I'm just gonna put this lightly, and I know I'm not gonna say any names,

because it is, if Jerry Springer was alive, he would be fucking DMing the shit out of me, and be like, I need him, I need him on the show now. I just watched that documentary. I only saw a piece of it. I was on the plane, I saw a piece of it, that was it. It's fun. Okay, so, basically I have a friend, right?

Since we were kids, he, I didn't know, but he has a cousin that married into the family, so they're not related by blood. Let me say that like eight times. There's no blood relation. We're little kids. We're kind of pure. We haven't even done drugs yet.

Like nine or 10. I haven't done drugs yet at least, right? And he and his cousin start dating and no one knows. He didn't even tell me. I didn't know too. We were like 18. But these are little kids we're talking about. We were 10 years old at the time.

They were like, oh, new family member. We're married to each other. We like each other, but don't tell anybody because we're cousins now. It's weird. But like, if you love each other, you love each other. I had no idea they kept it under wraps I know this for every day no two of them every single day he never told me

I found out at like 18 19 it's like I'm dating this girl like who who are you dating bro you know I've never seen you with a girl because he was with her but didn't tell anybody so we just thought he didn't date anybody do you see how it works out? We're like, ugh. I do now, visually. Right? He's always hanging out with his cousin, man. Always, right?

So we don't know, but he's at his family's house. So it's just like he's at his family's house. Little did he know, he's chilling with his girlfriend, too. But to keep that under wraps, it's like a soap opera. From 10 years old to then, I mean, that's a solid relationship they got going on here. That's what I'm trying to say. That's why I never felt weird. I'm like, dude, you guys really like each other. They must. They must. Because we always thought, how come now I think about,

you guys never dated anybody in high school, but you did now that we know. So anyway, at like 18, 19, everybody finds out and their family's all pissed off. So they kept it from their family too? And nobody knew. Under the same roof? Well, they don't live together, they're cousins. But okay, just coming over all the time. They're coming over, oh, hang out. I'm like, oh, hey.

So to me, I'm like, you guys really like each other if you're willing to hide this for this long. So what, 10 years goes by, they're still together, they're married, now they have kids. Like the family's completely like, well, you guys are together now. So they have kids. My friend has kids, I've seen these kids all the time.

And then about a year ago, we find out that his cut started cheating on him, which is like, come on, man, since 10 and now you're cheat. This isn't, we're so intertwined. If you get divorced, you're still seeing each other at Christmas. You're related. Are they married? Yeah, they're related too. So it's like, this goes back. This is Jerry's favorite.

It's forever. That's not the worst part. We come to find out she's cheating on my friend with my friend's little brother. Wait, she's cheating on her cousin. Which is her own cousin too, Mike. Wait, she's cheating on her cousin. Which is her own cousin too, Mike. Okay, right? All right, hold on, yeah. So now we're making the joke. Let's crease that.

Okay, sorry, sorry, go, go. The girl, female cousin, married to male cousin, not blood related to your buddy. Which is, I just knew her as my friend's cousin. Right, of course. We're kids, I'm like, which cousin? But now it's his wife, before this this they have children two kids. So it's very like oh wow You guys are dedicated then the female cousin starts starts cheating on male on my friend

Also her husband so when I follow her children, yes who his brother? With his little guy that's hard to. Keeping it in the family to the max. So wait, man. She just needs those jeans, I guess, dude. Because she's like, I need these. So their kids now go from uncle to stepdad? Is this my uncle or my stepdad? Whoa, dude.

Which is also and my cousin? Yeah. Ah! Yeah. That's funny to me. It's so stupid. Man, there's a lot of. Ah, yeah. It's funny to me. It's so stupid. Man, there's a lot of titles here, man. It's so dumb.

There's a lot of titles. It's bad. It's really bad. How did it get exposed? Because that's all. So first of all, they're keeping this quiet. He thought something was going on. Oh, she's keeping it quiet before.

She's really like doubling down. Yeah. Hey, other cousin. Do you want to start a brother? Is not even his little brother, which is the craziest part. He's just like a little kid. We're you know, you know what I mean? He's like four years younger than we were. So he's like, oh, your little brother, we're out of high school.

You're you're barely starting high school. So we didn't hang out all the time. And now we're like, what? He's like 34. And now this is hang out all the time and now we're like what he's like 34 and now this is it's all happened like a year ago and I've been just Dealing with little things and and they break up and get back together. So I have to be like they got back together That's two people in the same family that betrayed you. I Couldn't never two people the patience this fool has is insane. I don't know if it's patience. It's

patients got kids but but man I already said all your way your see I said all the stuff when he told me Like I already said all that yeah, so now it's like oh you're back Okay, she's great. And then again, he's like, no, something's going on again. And put a little hidden camera. He's like, something's going on. He put a little camera in the back of their and their daughter's.

See car seat. So she's like, something's going on. And you put a camera in there. And she went and picked up his little brother the whole day, So she was like, something's going on. And he put a camera in there. And she went and picked up his little brother the whole day and they're hanging out and kissing, going on a date and all this stuff while he was at work. So he gets it, loses his mind. They end up having a brotherly fight to the death damn near.

My friend wins. And then everything's back to normal. And they're back together again. So you just pick whoever beats up each other. Like whoever wins this fight, I'll take. I'll take the brother, whoever fights best. Is basically how that went down. So I'm sitting here just going, I can hate her, right?

I'm allowed to hate her, right? I don't like her at all. I hate this woman now. It's like I've grown up with you too. So it's so touchy and weird. You grew up with all three of them. All three involved. And I was hanging out with them all the time. So it's not like I wasn't going over there too. But for none of us to go, hey, weird, why you guys look at each other like nobody, nothing.

But the deception to, and also the dice roll to be like who are the younger brother and her who's making that first fucking move Cuz that's not a stranger. Well, a little bit had a little crush on her It felt like growing up or something. He definitely did right Where he knew and was secretly like But like who rolls the dice and reaches out first. And then someone's like, I don't know. I'm going to butcher this, but, um, we love Nick Swartz in here. Um, and it's a joke, something like, and again, I'm going to fuck it up, but it was something like before the internet and stuff. When,

if you were a freak, you know, how did you find out other people were freaky? You know, and he, and it was something like, and I'm going to make some up, but the premise is like, you know, like, you find out other people were freaky, you know, and he and it was something like it I'm gonna make something up, but the premise is like, you know, like you're like man. Why don't we just go eat some shit together? I'm just kidding man, unless you are Hey you want to shit on my face like I'm just kidding I drink piss unless you are Okay, I haven't asked, but I would love to ask like, yo, what was it like going, oh, this is, she went for it or he went for it is probably scarier than just streaking through a stadium. Yes. To reach out to your husband's

Yes, to reach out to your husband's brother, the uncle to your children, or you reach out to your brother's wife, the mother of your niece and nephew, like it's wild. And your cousin. And your cousin, I forgot. You have to remember that layer of it. I keep forgetting that part. If she rejects you, be like, now my uncles hate me

and my aunts and my other cousins because I'm a creep. But everyone knows this now, obviously. Everyone knows now. How's the family even dealing with this? I feel like they're just rolling the dice and seeing how every day is going. I'm just in the outside going, hey man, how's it going? And are we sure she's just keeping it in the family.

Cause it seems like if somebody would do that, that close to home, literally in that low, they'd be doing whatever they want. Question everything. Yeah. And the kids like the secretive stuff. That was wild. And now it's got me the question like, yo, they have a little, a smaller brother than that, he's going to watch out for this lady cause she's going through the whole line of brothers. It seems like, oh, there's even a younger brother than that. He's gonna need to watch out for this lady because she's going through the whole line of brothers,

it seems like. And there's a younger brother. Now the joke's like, hey, you better be careful. Watch out for her at Christmas. Make sure you stay visible because she's trying to get it, dude. I don't understand. She's the creepy uncle.

She's the creepy uncle. And it's okay. I know he's not gonna be like, why'd you talk about it? Because at this point he's like, I'm mad. I talked he's not going to be like, why did you talk about it? Because at this point, I'm mad. I talked about it a little on the show just because it was so. Because, you know, you do a show and sometimes like this is exactly what's happening and what I'm dealing with right now, and it sucks. And sometimes you just have to talk about it

because I've been dealing with this for like almost two years, it feels like. There's a lot going on, like also you as a man to have to feel like, man, I brought this person. Well, no, you know what? No, you didn't bring her in. She was a cousin. She was already at Christmas. I keep forgetting that part.

That's the worst part. It's not someone you brought in. She was in that house. She was already there, dude. Turnkey. It feels like the standards are just very low. Like, are you related to me? I can't do it then never mind You're not really I need you. I need you to be here always it's basically what for better for worse. I need you to help

Because at this point if it goes bad, which is already has gone bad It definitely you have to wait a generation for this to be like not awkward at this point What about the parents of both the boys? I haven't talked to them. Have they talked to their kids? Have they said, what the fuck are you doing? They said, fight it out. That's the most Matt Brown Mexican third world shit I ever heard in my life, dude.

Yo, fight it out. Fight it out. I'm kidding. They just said like, oh, you guys need to deal with Yo, fight it out. Fight it out. I'm kidding. They just said like, oh, you guys need to deal with this and fight it out. And that's when they fought it out. And they fought it out. And the craziest things are like- You fucking kids just watch you beat up their uncle, their cousin. Like it's a lot going on. Possible you stepdad. Possible, yeah. Oh my God.

And the thing is my friend, like. Holy shit. He moved out. Of the house? Of the house that he pays for and like, his brother goes over there. No. Still?

Yeah. No. It's like you're paying for a place for this guy to stay too. Not just stay, he's clearly fucking your wife. Not even them, he's over that, he's over that. They moved out, they're done. Recently they're just, like the past two months

were like, you know what, this is not gonna work. The marriage is done. Yes, so he's trying to get away and get a new spot. So she stayed in the house. But he still pays for the spot, and when they were broken up, he got a new spot. It's like, he's over there every day. You're paying for this guy to stay at your house now.

That's hurting my head, not even my heart, it's hurting my head. dude. Not even my heart. It's hurting my head. That will fuck me up. That'd be, that's dark and deep, dude. Isn't it crazy? To do to your own brother. There you go. You took the non-blood cousin over your blood brother

and your niece and nephew are blood, bro. They're your blood. It's so much worse every time you circle and oh, yeah And these are at another layer start putting that plus sign on this. Yes, it is fucking it's a problem There's a max is and I can only imagine if something had where she had a baby with the other brother because now it's all my god What is gonna happen? That's my cousin my brother my step. What is that? Also, that's my uncle my dad my stepdad my cousin, my brother, my stepbrother. What is that? Also that's my uncle, my dad, my stepdad, my cousin. Oh God.

I was just gonna give up. I just give up because it's too hard to keep up with. I don't even understand how you could show your face around anywhere. Oh, she's fine with it. She is? Curse the lamp. You're the lamp.

That's the worst part. I had to recently go on Facebook and just go block I can't see you how are you fine well I just got Facebook recently with all this what you guys do on Facebook just updates about I'm cooking this all the people I went to high school with like you guys are is updating cook chicken cajetory nobody cares so I had to go on Facebook and now I see all them, and I see all their family. I'm like, oh, I gotta start blocking people.

And it's all just this intertwined fucking spiderweb of family. And it's been a long time since I've known them. Yeah. I was the same age as him. Like, I know these people well, too, and I gotta go, hey, I don't like you anymore of what you did.

Have you seen them since they split? Yeah. You saw her separately too. How did that go? Cause I saw those kids. How did that go? Oh, I just pretend nothing happened. Oh, hey, how you doing?

Oh yeah, for sure. And I just left. We don't know you're fucking your uncle cousin. Yeah, your uncle cousin. Or whatever the fuck it is. I don't know, I just kind of just tried to like, to not be mean. I'm just to like, to not be mean. I'm just trying my best to not be mean and just be.

Listen, that is, that's very nice. Yeah, that one is a wild one. It's not even hot in here and I'm sweaty. Just thinking about being in the situation. But yeah, that's new. That's what's been going on lately. And that has nothing to do with me, which is insane. The first thing ever that doesn't have anything,

I'm just looking at it. Well also at it like I don't even know. Just I'm trying to put myself in your shoes. Like, I don't have any hindsight on that. I don't have any advice to give you on that. Obviously is get the fuck out. But you can't you're intertwined because you now have children in there. And that's your brother. This is not a hey, you know what?

You cheated. We're divorced. I'm a go live my life over here. See you later. Nothing. Every, every holiday. Fuck you. I'll see you Chris. Fuck you. I'll see you off the Christmas. Come on. We're out of here. Motherfuck. Four times a year,

at least they gotta see each other. Y'all those baptisms and shit, man. Fuck y'all seeing that baptism. We're out, man. It's insane. That is fucked. It sucks a lot. Every holiday. Oh, we've talked about this for hours before.

How? Oh man. How? Can't deal with it. How can you even get fucking pumped to go over there? You know what I mean? For a holiday. Everything just tastes like shit.

Just staring at each other. You know what you're going into. Every time. And you don't even have your brother to vent to To be like man, this can you believe what you're doing to me, man? Yeah, god I hate you and I love you that's my chair man god damn It's weird. You like the house I pay for for you For you And the little brother doesn't have a job which is the craziest part about all this is he a single man does he have

Kids as well. No No kids. He has no job. I mean that's also you're really talking about a type of person It sounds like they don't want to do anything and lives at home. No job I'll just fucking take my brother's wife. And not even that, when they moved out, I've read they live next door to each other. What do you mean? Their parents live not even half a block,

not even one house, two houses over from where they decided to live with their children. Where they followed it out. And so where his little brother lives at home, they live next door to each other. Wait, his little brother's 35 and lives at home He's five four years younger than us. So 31. Okay 31 lives at home two doors away from the house He now walks over to the fuck his brother's wife. Get out of here, dude. That's crazy

It's even worse and even if it falls apart, he's like whatever I'm just gonna go home houses Hop one fence and he comes home. Dude, that's a wild story right now. It's, there's layers. It just keeps going. As soon as you peel the onion, it just more and more in there. I used to have to stop listening at a point. We're like, you know what, how about this?

Just leave, pretend this didn't happen. Are these the only two siblings from these parents? Like, that's why that's okay. It's like, at least, at least it's okay because you have more help, I guess. But, but is that family turned on the younger brother too? At first? No. At first. Oh, they fought. What was that? First he was denying it and he's like, look at the video tape of with her. And they're like, fight it out. Everybody. He still lives there. So it's so awkward. It is the brownest, most white trash shit

I've ever seen in my life. Right. These are all the court, like all the recipes on white trash. No doubt. This is trailer trash, white trash, inbred bullshit. But with Mexicans. Yup. A hundred percent. Wow. Shocking.

That is a fucking wild story. Yeah. It's over now. So that's why I'm like, you know, let's talk about it. Cause this is too good. It's insane. And those poor kids. They're young enough to, they don't have any, can't really speak.

Are they? Okay. Yeah. They can talk, but they can't really talk. So it's like. Well, if those motherfuckers aren't talking in a couple more years, I think we know we fucked them up. Oh, I can imagine. They need to knock it off before they're like competent and go, I'm confused. Is this my, oh yeah, we talked about it too much. No. I'm saying like it's cousin, uncle.

I'm thinking like too, like I I'm the guy, your friend, who was cheated on, I mean by his wife and his brother, I don't know that I trust anyone again after that. I'm not coming to any family events and stuff. Like that's when, you know, they're like, be the bigger person and take that. Listen, sometimes I don't wanna take the motherfucking high road.

I don't wanna take it. Sometimes I wanna take want to take the motherfucking high road. I don't want to take it. Sometimes I want to take that low motherfucking road down here and just trudge along that way sometimes too. I would be the honestly every right to if that happens to you. You need new tires. Not going to cut them. It's going to let the air out every day because you live next door to me. So a little bit every day.

I forgot about that. I'm going to fuck her makeup up. I'm going to do a bunch of stupid shit to her when she doesn't know it's me. Always take the batteries out of shit. When I leave, oh, I would be a menace to her like a ghost. I'd be like a ghost terrorizing her and him every single day.

So where, how far away now does your friend live from that? Oh, even across town. Okay, but does he still see the kids and stuff? Yeah. She's not doing it. So wait, when she's unavailable Uncle fucking Roberto is watching the fucking kids is that is my brother's watching my kids. I don't know man

I didn't even I would be so pissed. Well, even if I live in the house with the parents away from me though No, what I'm saying is a that if my kids are with their mom. Oh, and she's at work. And she's at work and the dude is to watch my kids. The dude's your brother. The dude's your brother and he's getting the quality time that you don't get. Man, fuck that. And you just do this over the fence and go, what are you guys doing?

I can hear it. I can hear my kids Every day Jason I can hear for three days a week. I can hear him, but I can't see you Yeah, I'll get to play with them or hug them and shit. It's really terrible. That is fucking What spiderweb of shit right there? It's just I hope that's all I hope it's oh man. That's it Cuz I can't I can't do that anymore. That ain't gonna be it dude. There's no way she's cheating on that younger brother, too I don't know what you know what I don't know who I don't doubt it I do not doubt that at all

And if it's in house, that's gonna be even crazy if it's in house if it's in house the rest are all married So it's gonna get even crazier So so far she's only in house. I'm dating in the family only. This is the white trash. This is the basic formula of white trash. This is how Jerry Spier got an idea. Like, you know, what would be fun? This every day. So the only marriage, and I don't mean to say that that lightly that she's ruined so far is just hers The younger brother was not involved with anyone or no We may we thought he was gay since we were growing up. Oh, no

We really don't got mad about that. We we never said it's a good pretty I we made a bet with Mike your little brother's gay, dude Well, I was like 18 my watch by the time he's 18 he's gonna come and he never did. How wrong were you? He never did. How wrong were you? I remember making fun of it like he's gay dude, I know he is, nothing's wrong with that man.

But I'm calling it, like I know it. My sister's gay, I have hella gay cousins, I could see it. He's starting young, I could see it on him. Turns out no, not at all. Not at all. Not even a little bit, he's a schem young. I could see it on him. Turns out, no, not at all. Not at all. Not even a little bit. He's a schemer. A schemer more than anything. So he gets his ass beat and then still goes back? Yeah.

That's fucking just all kinds of disgraceful. It's like the worst parts of every movie all the time. Two lions go at it and the loser's still going over and the lady's taking him back. No, no female lion, whatever take that Something's on something. There's drugs involved There's something where it's like you'll have blackmail on you remember that you like drugs and I have drugs something's going on now I'm wondering if if both those kids are really his Because if it's why I'm his brother, I know because they would look alike. It's in the bloodline. All that would test out, wouldn't it? Oh man. Yeah. I thought about this. We talked about

this a lot too. Like, oh, you have to look like you. But so does your brother. Yeah. I'm getting, I'm getting tests everywhere. Yeah. It's really sad actually. We talked about it before. It's like, no, they both look identical to you, but I don't know. What's he gonna do? He's just living his life, gonna keep working and doing his job and being a dad.

Going day by day. Just moving along, which is great. Which is the best thing he could do. I mean, it's kind of the only thing he could do. I'd be in prison, I think. I'm over here thinking I would not just be like, well, I'm gonna get up and do it. No, hell no.

I'm raining hell down on that fucking house. What do they call it when they drag people in the cars with the ropes? Yeah. Two ropes. I'm going over, my mom and dad's getting a meal. I'm gonna go over, I'm gonna whip some ass, and I'm gonna go back over and have another motherfucker.

Oh yeah. No, I couldn't take that. There's, there's a level of, uh, I don't even know what to call that level. We know when they plead by guilty by insanity or I think that qualifies. That's yeah. I do feel like he's gone to prison, but I feel like it would be a softer sentence if it's your brother and your wife. That's just betrayal on so many levels. And your cousin.

You can't about that part, man. That's when you're in court going, and your cousin. Thank you, and my cousin. Man, all bad, dude. It's not fun. But yeah, I forget, yeah, highlight the low lights. There's no fucking highlights there at all. It's not fun. But yeah, I forget. Yeah. Highlight the low lights. There's no fucking highlights there at all. There's nothing.

There's nothing good except it's over. And that's it, man. You can't even you can't even joke about it. Like, there's no joke about it at all. We haven't said one joke except the obvious. There's nothing you can say that's good, dude. He doesn't have to pay, I guess, alimony, right? Man, if he's gotta give her money

that his brother gets to have too, that would make somebody kill somebody. I'd understand that. That is something that would make a human being snap. I'm not justifying it in any way, nor do I condone it in any way. But I get it. I would. If that happened and all that, I would.

If this is a movie, everybody be like, all right, we get it why you didn't. Then you know who suffers again the most? The kids. Because now dad's in prison and those two are dead. And they got no uncle. You don't have any uncles or cousins. No. Three people, the whole family, every title in the family. Their luck, they go to the same prison. Oh, wait, no, he'd be dead. Nevermind. I just thought about it.

It's just dad in prison. He's killing those two. I worked at UPS. Shout out to UPS Baltimore, primary one, Joe Avenue. I worked there. I know you always say the address with the two. I worked there. And a guy, I don't remember the full story, but he worked as, he was hired by the state because he had served 18 years on a 20 year life sentence for, and I can't remember which one, he shot, he came home and found his best friend and wife fucking in, in their bed in his home and he shot them. Kill them both. No, he killed the guy. I think he's tried to kill both.

The guy died. The lady didn't. He went to prison for 20 years and back then temporary insanity and all that crime of passion didn't even exist. Oh, it wasn't even a thing that, that they had brought yet. This is like from, I don't know, the 70s maybe. Or crime of passion is what I think it was. And so he served 18 to 20. He got hired by the state to... It was a massive building. It was a hub and it had a cafeteria with like 30 vending machines.

But I mean, these vending machines were carousels with cake, cool shit and cheese steaks and all. And he his job was to stock all of it for the whole building all day and night. That was his job. And he was. But that's what he did. And I would sit and talk to him all the time. Like, what happened? He's like, I came home, my best friend.

So I mean, you gotta go do some time. I like that you brought up UPS, by the way, where's the guy? You gotta go do some time. He did, he shot, he did that crime of passion shit. He did it. Oh man, every day in there going, she didn't die. Just pissed in prison knowing that she lived through it.

Or you're doing Two two sentences for each person instead of just the one I guess at least he got to shoot it He got 18 out of 20. He did he got to shoot two people Oh, man, then he was like it was Pat. What's his Social Security? Pat he's from Baltimore. It was great. It works for the city. This dude knew everybody's dirt and shit. He talked to you and be like, wow, that's crazy, man. You're fucking cousin, uncle, all that's going on. And then somebody walked by, like, what's up, Larry? His wife's cheating on him right now.

You know, he's one of them guys. Oh, he knew everything. He knew everything. He knew everything. He knew everything. He ran numbers for us. He did all our fantasy football for us. Oh, he's doing the same shit?

He was doing the same shit off the books. But he was- Just out of prison? Yeah, just out of prison. What a criminal motherfucker, dude. Just gossiping and gambling? Gossiping and gambling and filling up the vending machines, bro.

And he knew everybody's business. I'd play my numbers with him every night. I'd go get my football bets with him and shit. I'd do all that. And he was professional. He had he had little pieces of paper so he could circle him. This big, huh? Ha ha ha ha.

Oh, I said they used to write everybody play. This dude would do the lotto or lottery, the daily lottery, and he would use the numbers on the TV. But if you gave them the money, they would just cash out at 100 percent, not take the cut. The state does. You see what I'm saying? We're playing the same game. You're just giving me your money.

Have you ever had one of these guys not pay you? No. Oh, okay. No. I'll tell you why. The odds are in their favor every night. Almost every night, no one's winning. Through the casino.

Right. Yeah. Everyone in that building from the top supervisors down are playing that lottery number and almost every night of the week, no one's winning. And then every now and then you'll win 2,500. That's nothing. They already made 40,000 off of it. You know what I mean?

Like killing it. Right. Coming in with football, everything, dude. We all played. And then he would leave around, I don't know, by eight o'clock, nine o'clock at night. I'm in there until two or three in the morning. It would just be a napkin right here at the edge of this table, just like this, right there.

And it would just have the three, the daily three digit and the daily four. And he would just walk by at night, look at it, like, I fucking won. And then the next morning you go see Pat and he give you your money. And there was never a problem. This sounds incredible. I would want to go to work. He was fun to sit and talk to dude. How'd you kill? How'd you kill him? Tell me about all the old prison stories of Baltimore prison. That was it.

And he was an older dude. You, this guy shuffled a little bit. He was like, you did not fucking fucking killed, killed one almost to do. Baltimore prisons just sounds cold. All prisons sound cold man. over here. We got some son It's even worse cold metal you ever fucking smack your shit Do we used to go by because maximum security is right off 83 the Joe Paul's press Well, you can see it either little slit window and you we all go by like prisoners Throwing jolly ranchers when you go by and shit. Yeah.

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are you in touch with your biological father? Is he alive? Yeah, my dad? You are, okay. Oh yeah, yes. So the stepdad was just someone your mom brought in, not because your dad wasn't around, just because they weren't together.

Oh yeah, so my mom and dad broke up when I was like four. A little, right, okay. So my mom got with that. My stepdad when I was like, nah, 10. 10 to like 16. Okay. 10 to 15 maybe, or like nine to 15.

So yeah, no, my dad's always around. My dad is awesome, dude. My dad's super, imagine just me that just likes hard drugs. Nice guy. Oh, he likes hard shit. Super cool, except he's mad offensive. So like, I am nervous. I haven't had him on the show. Like, I am nervous. Oh, he looks super cool. He's mad offensive. So like I am a nervous.

I haven't had him on the show. Like I am nervous. Oh, really? He says some shit. I apologize for him all the time, all the time. He says like in public. Have you ever had to do that in public? Like as a kid all the time? Like what? Give me an example. When you're the restaurant Chevy's.

Yeah, I do. I love. All right. So they make their own. Yeah, they make everything. We had one in my town. Got a machine. Yeah, I love Chevy's. All right, so they make their own. Yeah, they make everything, right? They make their own tortillas. We had one in my town when I was a kid. Got a machine, I loved Chevy's. Yeah, the little press. I love it. So we're sitting there and our waitress,

my dad's like, my dad was like in Mario Lopez's shape when he was young. He was like kind of good looking. Good looking, like he was in shape. And then, you know, I get it. He's a younger guy, he doesn't have a girlfriend. You know, he drives a truck, He probably makes a lot of money. He's a diesel driver, mechanic.

He's got two kids he doesn't have to take care of basically. So he's like, I have money. I don't pay child support. He's a fucker. So we're at the restaurant, you know, with my uncle Mario. They're both young. He's all working out and this, our waitress comes up. She's a pretty white, like a young white blonde girl.

I'm about seven. I'm like, no, what are you gonna do? I know something's gonna happen. I'm about seven. I'm like, no, what are you going to do? I know something's going to happen. I'm gonna have to say sorry. Something. I know it. And you know, we're ordering chips and salsa. I'm like, all right. My dad says something in Spanish to my uncle. I'm like, what the fuck you say? Something slick. I know it is. Then she comes back. Can I get you anything to drink? And my dad's like, oh yeah, how about a blow job? You remember this?

I know that's bad, I've heard it in movies before. I just know that's like, I know that's sex. I'm a kid, I'm like, that's sex. So how about a blowjob? Looks right in her eyes, she goes, what? He goes, a blowjob. And she goes, uh, looks at us like you're kid, what? And he goes, a blow job. And she goes, uh. Looks at us like you're kid, what?

Not like she was like, ew. She was almost like, your kids are here. I swear she was like more of a like, she wasn't down, but she wasn't super offended, right? You know what I mean? And my uncle Mario was like laughing. You said it, like they're kids. My dad had me at 19.

So he's a child, right? He's only 25 at this time. So still a grown ass man. Enough to not know to say that. She goes, what? And she says it like that. And he goes, the drink? Do you have it on the menu?

She goes, oh no, no, we don't have drinks like that. He goes, oh, I'm sorry. I was just, it's a drink always get no, I think just water. And he walks away and he started dying laughing. My sister's two years older than me. She's pissed. I could see that she's upset because like once again, I have to do this shit every time I'm in public, even I got older because I have little brothers

and my dad doesn't parent them. And they'd be, you know, those Mexican kids that are just loud and jumping on the on the table. Yeah, that's my brother.'t parent them. And they'd be, you know, those Mexican kids that are just loud and jumping on the table. Yeah. That's my brother. I do know that. All right. Behind me is CPK on my neck and shit.

Yeah, I know that. I can't do it. I was like 19. Just brawl right there, huh? Oh, you guys good? Are you guys good? You good? Oh, so.

Got a crowd out of my shirt. But you know, like I'm the one embarrassed. And I'm looking at my dad like, dad, tell him something. Hey, so annoying. You gotta cry out loud, I'm not sure. But you know, like I'm the one embarrassed and I'm looking at my dad like, dad, tell him something. Hey, get down. I have to apologize to tables constantly when he used to go out like, I'm sorry. Stay down.

And I'm just- You're parenting. Dad, pay attention. But he's like, oh, it's fine. They're kids. I'm like, nah, but tell him to shut up. Anyway, oh, I got one for you real quick. I just went to the movies with my dad

for the first time since Scary Movie 2. What fucking year is that? Is that the 90s? There's like 2003, before eighth grade maybe. That's the last time I went to the movies with my dad. So I don't know him. I'm an adult now. I get it, I'm 35 now.

I'm not a little boy. I get it, I might look like a kid,. I'm an adult now. I get it. I'm 35 now. I'm not a little boy. I get it. I might look like a kid, but I'm an adult. I went to the movies recently. My older sister, I know she's a, she just talks so loud at movies that it's embarrassing. You know, when he was like, yo, who is that? That's my sister.

I found out two years ago that's her. I didn't know that. So I'm like going to the movies. But is she just having a regular conversation or is she yelling shit about the movie? No, she's talking to us full volume though. Hey, you know what she was in? Are you stupid?

What she was in. And she goes, it's the previews. Still. Yeah, I know people think you could just talk over that. So I went to the movies. I didn't know. I went to watch a movie with my little brother, which is 11, my dad kept having kids.

My sister, which is 17, my dad, he's 54, he's a grown man. And my sister, she's like 35, all grown except for this little boy. I'm sitting there, the movie starts, and my fucking dad is worse than my sister, times 100. I had no idea. He entered his old man stage. So every time a fucking word popped up,

oh, 20 years ago, dead silence, full volume voice, right? Full theater and shit. Full volume, no, no. I think 30 seconds in he goes, are we the only ones in here? Full volume, like there's multiple people in front of us and everybody's looking back at us. I'm just, ah, my dad's saying so much that my sister is shutting up because she's like,

I can't control. She's like, I can't, I can't talk. He's too loud. My little brother's playing a video game on his phone, takes pictures with a fucking flash on it. I'm like, yo, what is happening over here? My little sister starts talking full volume and I'm just, I'm just doing this waiting for Craven to start sitting there. Oh my God, dude. Every time six, 20 BC, uh,

present day, my dad full volume ask, like letting us know, it's present day. Like, like we can't read this shit. So anyway, yeah, my dad is doing better right now, but I did not know that we were that family. I had no idea, dude. It was so damn, it was like watching the fan, it just litters. And then you find out like, oh, you guys lit. Now I look like I lit it.

That's a good one. That's a good one if you're with litters. Yeah, I didn't think of that. I'm constantly looking, like looking at people when they look back, oh man, it got bad. Anyway, that was off topic, but I just found out. My dad is, he's an old man, full volume speaker, dude. Just found that out.

But yeah, he says offensive stuff all the time. Well, what made him get clean? Like when did he finally get clean? Okay, so growing up, like I said, my dad, he was ish there, right? So my dad was really cool. He's always super nice, always happy. He's the funny person.

He's always making everybody laugh. But just because he's saying his thoughts out loud, not because he's trying to be funny. Do you really think that? Fuck, that's hilarious. So it's like we're laughing at him, but with him too. And he was on drugs the whole time, like on crank my whole life, like when I was a kid.

So I didn't really see him, but I always knew like, if he's around, let's hang out, right? So I didn't know he was on drugs. I just knew that he did drugs. I didn't know how bad it was, but you know, my dad works his ass off, but you know those tweakers that are fucking, but they're working constantly still.

That's my dad with the fucking job. That's how I know. That's how I know he's tweaking. Working on his truck for two days. Like who, fuck that. He's on drugs, man. Like I didn't know like he's been out there for two days. He hasn't came in. That's crazy.

You know, working on the truck, weird. But I didn't know he's out all night doing cra- I was a kid. Anyway, he got clean when I was like 14, right? So when I was 14, he moved to Portland, Oregon to work with my uncle and got completely clean. On his own, or did he go to like a rehab or? No, we had to do an intervention.

You did? Yeah, I remember what happened. I've been part of a couple of those. How'd you get them? Oh, dude, he walked in and went, huh. Early morning, late at night, when'd you get them? Afternoon. Yeah?

Right when he got off one of, I got back from working on our truck. Who was there? How many people? Our whole family. Really? My grandma, my scary grandpa. Were the cousins that were fucking all there?

Ah! Were they there too? Yeah, yeah they were. They were, everybody came. I mean, my friends always with me. So if I met my grandmas, my friends are there cause there's nobody there. So tell me how. You know what I'm saying? Like, so I always had my friend there if I met my grandmas, my friends are there cause there's nobody there. So tell me.

You know what I'm saying? Like, so I always had my friend there. She wasn't there obviously, cause I could bring my friends little cousin. But my friend was the ringleader of it. Who was like, all right, we need to do this. Aunt Tanya that ended up cheating on my uncle and selling his entire business for his best friend.

And then lost the whole business. No. No. This is a goddamn scandalous family. Oh my God. My uncle hired me to marry this lady named Tanya. She's my aunt Tanya. My uncle Haime, he cheated on her all the time. He's a bastard, right? But the fourth one time she does it to him, she does it with his

worker. That's his friend. My uncle owned a business. So the one that my uncle's always like, he's my friend, but he's just kinda, he doesn't really wanna work. The one you don't suspect. He doesn't really wanna work. And then turns out she's like, we're getting a divorce and he's moving in and you're gonna pay. So he had to pay for the house for two years.

Oh. For my, and he quit and he had to give up the business to my aunt, so now his worker owns my uncle's business and runs it into the ground. Oh God. They ended up selling it. I'll never be back. It was a moving truck, a moving company.

He had like four trucks. They sold all of them. She got hooked on drugs. He got her hooked on drugs. Lost the kids, everything. And my uncle's sitting there just like this, well, I guess I have to start over. Holy shit.

It's sad, but it's also like you were a bastard too. This is the lady that set up the intervention. Yeah. Yeah. Four years later, she's hooked on the same drug that she's. Yeah. Crazy. Right. So yeah, she set up the intervention and then she's there. Counselor there a counselor there for it too? It's her.

Huh? It's her. No. There's no counselor. You know how Mexican fools don't go to the doctors and diagnose themselves? Same shit. We had the whitest person in the family, my aunt Tanya,

and she's a white lady and she set it up and my grandma sat there and spoke in broken-ass English to my, even though she could just be Spanish. I don't know why she did the English shit. It was weird. And then I had to like stand up and say something. But I said the same thing I said at my dad's AA meeting when he graduated. I'm like, Dad, I really want you to be better. I just did the whole thing. I'm like, dude, I don't know you're untried. I just know you don't fucking come around. He doesn't look like he's twack. I said, but he's a little fucking,

but he's always like doing something. And then we had a whole intervention. He's like, all right, I'll move. And then he moved and just got, became an alcoholic, stopped doing drugs and just started drinking in replace of it. And my dad, I watched my dad chug a fifth before. It was all right, I'll move.

It was I'll move and I'll get clean, but I'm gonna drink. Drink instead. Yeah, so it didn't happen for like four months. He was just good and clean. And then the way I smoke weed, I describe, I smoke great is the way he fucking drinks, man. My dad's a monster.

But yeah, I watched him put like a straw in the fifth, like a plastic straw so he could chug it. And I watched him chug a whole Jack Daniels, like the fifth. And that's when I was like, damn, there's something's wrong with this guy. I watched him look at me and get off, he was talking shit to me

and then went and flopped on the bed. Nah, face down. Like four or five minutes after he, I watched him choke, he's like, watch this. Like he's 50, he's like, check this shit out. I'm like, dad, what the fuck, man? I was like 16 at the time. It was weird watching my dad.

Like I always had to coach him. Like, hey man, don't drive right now. Come on, give me your keys. I'm like, 11. I'm like, come on, man. Like I just talked to him, he's my older brother because he does the dumbest shit, dude. But he got clean when I was what, 17 or 19?

And he's been clean for like eight, 17 years. Oh yeah, even drinking and everything? Not a drop, nothing. Okay. And a fucking year and a half later, or a year and a half ago, like I was telling you, like he, someone, my little,

because I have my little brothers and sisters now. They're in high school, my little brother's 11. So my little brother calls me, dad's acting weird. I'm like, fuck, what kind of weird? And he said one thing, I'm like, oh no. Cause I used to have to chop my dad from going to the store, take him to the store, or I'm fucking against him,

and like, you don't want me to be happy, I'm like, oh my God, I'll take you to the store. Guys, don't want him to drive, cause he will drive and crash. He's done it many times So I'm like, what do you mean exactly? He's like he's being mean. I'm like, what'd you do? He goes nothing. Oh no So he's in the garage. Oh my god. He's working on a car for two days Yep, he's in the garage like no, that's not good. But I'm an adult now So my dad talks to me like he's my friend now. After I've grown up, he's been sober. So we talk. He's my dad. How many years again? Like 17 years old. Oh, wow. 16.

And then I'm talking to my sister, which is just about to graduate high school. And mind you, ready? Tony Hawk is coming and Jason Ellis. So I'm like, I'm excited. They're coming like three hours. I'm at the warehouse, like, oh my God, I gotta get my shit prepped up, getting stoked. And I get the call, I'm like, oh, no fucking way. So like when Tony Hawk said, I'm texting them, doing it, I'm like, damn, I have to, I drove, after the show, I drove straight to my fucking back to Merced, so I had to deal with this guy lost

in the city, like a baby and shit. I'm like, they don't know what to do. They've never experienced my dad drunk because they've, you know, they're only 16, 17. They never seen this. So I'm like, damn, I got to deal with, so the whole time during that episode, I'm like, fuck, I got to deal with this motherfucker again.

I thought we were done. And was it just alcohol though? Well, when I went to find him, I couldn't find him. So I'm like, oh, he's not at his spots. Then I don't know where the hell he's at because he might as a tweaker. He's a drug addict, dude. And, but he's also a functioning one.

So he has a diesel, he has a business, he works for eight days straight and then comes home and crashes because he's on drugs. So I'm like, all right, this is different. He's an adult now. Before he was a little boy basically doing that shit So like I'm dealing with this I drive there. I'm trying to find him in this My town I finally find his ass and my uncle's like he's got his gun. I'm like, oh god is this

This is how I go Poor bastard Marvin Gaye, his dad took him out. That's why, no lie, I was nervous to walk to his truck. When he finally stood up for his mom after his dad, and then his dad killed him. And no lie, my dad's great, but I'm like, if he's blackout drunk. Does he even know what he's doing? Does he even know what's happening?

Right, yeah. I'm like, I'm gonna wait. So I was like, I'll wait till the morning. I waited till the morning, went and tried to talk to him. Anyway, I'm on the phone with him cause I can't find him after I talked to him, like trying to, I offered him, he hates driving. He's been driving since he was 14 by himself on the road.

He's like, what, 54? 40 years he's been driving, doing diesel. He's on drugs, had kids young, he can't do nothing. I'm trying to explain to him, like, dude, you've never had fun. Have you ever been on vacation? No. All right then.

Have you ever not worried about everybody else? No, Mike, and this is my dad's shitty drunk, so I'm trying to be positive and agree with him so he doesn't freak out on me and start taking off and giving something. And then I'm like, it's just so long, because it's a long story, because there's people in my dad's life that I remember

That I hate like his friends if I see their faces I feel like a kid again like I fucking hate you cuz I know you smoke meth with my dad Mm-hmm, and I know you're the motherfucker that gets it for him. I know I Delivered a pizza to one of his old tweaker friends one time and I remember he saw me and I saw he just put his head Down he took the money out cuz I'm like I'm big enough to fuck you up now Oh, I like it. He wasn't with your dad. Just yeah You're the guy I told to stay away from my dad now that I'm older I can beat the shit out cuz I was a little Boy, like can you please stop hanging right my dad, right? You know, I beg these guys like please stop doing drugs my dad

He's doesn't come around You know, I go to their houses and try to find my dad at tweaker spots. Like it's annoying, dude. It's more annoying than it sacks. Like, oh, fuck, I got shit to do. Like I got to deal with you and be sad about it. And tweakers are probably, I'm thinking about it too, just like- It's functioning. They're active. You know what I mean? Oh, they're always going there. Where they're on the bed or in a chair.

I know where he's at. If I can know where he's at. Tweakers are out there, man. I'm so happy, dude. My dad will start sprinting. He'll just start running away. Yeah, they're active. He'll just start running down the block. And I'm like, dad, you're going to get arrested, dude.

Stop running and screaming. It's at a point where it's just dumb. Anyway, I'm talking to him on the phone. Like, the day later, he's like, talking about how much he's drinking. I'm like, oh, yeah, that's cool, man. It's all right. Because I haven't smoked yet.

I'm like, what? He goes, I've been drinking a lot. I'm like, oh, no. Soon as he said, I'm like, ah, this fool's on drugs again. Because then he disappeared for like four days. But like my little brothers and sisters don't know what this is like. He's showing up to meetings. He takes the baseball games. He's like a dad, right? So now they're like, yo, dad's yelling at me and he's in the garage and he's been gone for four days now. So they're freaking, they don't know what to do. So I'm trying to like do things in life and run these businesses and like text my sister,

so this is what you're gonna do. You're gonna take the keys, you're gonna hide the fucking keys, I know it's where his spare says, we're gonna go hide it, because he will crash his truck. He will wreck his truck, he'll fucking hit a tree. My dad, he's just, once he's drunk, it's it. You can't even talk to him. He's like, he's another person.

He's not even fun no more. Oh God. Ugh, anyway. Yeah, that lasted for like a year and a half, man. It just died down like two months, three months ago. He's clean again? Yeah, thank God, dude. And what made him stop that? I feel like this age, it's health.

Like I told him, dude, no, no, he's... Drug addicts don't die from drugs. They have everlasting life. Once they stop doing drugs, it's when they die. That's a great point, actually. It like hardens their insides. If you've been on them for that long, you got to keep on going. Maintain. No, it's a fact, man. But I kept telling him, you're getting old, dude. He has a stomach bypass surgery because he's not even fat, but he thought he was fat.

And you're drinking and chugging beers and doing drugs. You're going to die. And I told him, I got married last year. I asked him, you cannot come if you're fucked up. Do not show up if you're fucked up. Did he come? My dad showed up sober, didn't drink a drop. All right, all right.

I'm like, all right, man. He came, he had his little camcorder, like an old man. Camcorder, he's got a camcorder. He had it. Ha ha ha ha. It's the same one my little brother had, because he bought a vintage one, because he thought it looked cool.

My dad brought the same fucking camera. So I was there, I'm like, damn, my dad's my dad. All right, this is insane to me, right? Because me and Marty did Ted Talk and that fool didn't show up because he was fucked up and crashed his car. Crashed it and then called me in the morning, like, hey, what are you doing today?

I'm like, nothing important. Like he was like, I'm not gonna, he was trying to be like, I can't make it. But he was all fucked up, I'm like, uh, I'm not gonna he was trying to be like I can't make it But he was all fucked up like no nothing do nothing crazy. Nothing today. I'm like not a thing And I talked to you later And I told Marty was like I felt like I was at football games again like oh So the Ted talk I lied to like three fans. Like, where's your dad? Like, I think, I don't know where he is. I think he's coming right now.

At Ted Talk. I'm all like professional. Like, he's got to be here. I think he's I just saw him because the fans are like, yo, I heard your dad's coming. It reminds me. God. It's the greatest fucking thing in Talladega Nights. You've seen Talladega Night? That's it.

And his dad finally comes to the fucking championship race and the guy at the window goes, and they play that heartfelt guitar. He's like, sir, I've been waiting a long time to give you these. And he slides them out and he hits them and he slaps them on the side and he goes, two tickets!

Who needs all of them? And he's sold them! Sold them! It's the Leroy! Incredible. And then he watches from outside the fence, just acting. He goes, two tickets! Who needs all of them? Sold them at the Libra. And then he watches from outside the fence, just acting. Drinking the beers he bought with the money. Yeah, see, my dad's not a degenerate, but that's the vibe I hate, dude.

Yeah, that's the vibe. Sometimes I'm like, I'm too old to be lying for you, man. Come on. But since, he's been good. He's been good since, so. I'm glad you're here. I don't know, man. At this point, I already told you, you're only 35, dude. You got a while. You got a long way to go ahead of your

brother and you lived a while one so far. Thank you. Thank you for coming on here and doing this. Yeah. Thank you for sharing this story. I'm all pissed off, dude. Uh, promote whatever you'd like one more time, please. Drug-free lifestyles. Monogamy. Don't be a bitch. Yeah, don't be a cheating bitch. Also, yeah, check out the podcast, Dope As Usual podcast on every platform. Yeah, we drop Tuesdays at 12.30.

Pushtrees and Zoomies, dopeshop.com. Oh, my paper Tuesdays at 12.30. Push trees and zoomies, dopashop.com. Oh, my paper company's finally launching. Yeah? You're doing a lot, right? Good for you. That Zoomies is a big deal, dude. Dude, they're cool, man. They're awesome. I'll see them everywhere I go.

It turned out it was a fan that watches my content, got the second buyer of America, and he's like, the first thing I wanted to do was get you on. I'm like, no way. That's awesome. All of them, like the Laweed videos. He's like, first thing I wanted to do was get you on like no way that's all often like the weed videos like he's like I'm a fan and I like your company congrats yeah man so that that's all I'm doing right now I'm just working dude all right Ryan sickler as always on all your social media Ryan sickler comm we'll talk to y'all next week later.