The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - 381: Ned Fulmer on Cheating, Scandal & Losing It All | The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler #381

Episode Date: April 13, 2026

My HoneyDew this week is Ned Fulmer, host of The Rock Bottom Podcast. Ned Highlights the Lowlights of being diagnosed with multiple sclerosis while also finding himself at the center of a very public workplace cheating scandal. After rising to fame at BuzzFeed as the “wholesome husband,” Ned opens up about losing it all and what it’s like to navigate an affair both privately and in front of the world. We talk therapy, accountability, and how self-reflection helped him build a healthier path forward, including co-parenting after separation. 🎟️See me live. All tickets at www.ryansickler.com/tour 🎤Check out my new standup special “Live & Alive” streaming on my YouTube now! http://youtu.be/PMGWVyM2NJo?si=SrhXjgzR1pe6CyYE 👉 Subscribe for more standup and new episodes of The HoneyDew, The Wayback, and more! http://youtube.com/@rsickler ✅ Subscribe to my Patreon “The HoneyDew with Y’all”! Get The HoneyDew audio and video a day early, ad-free, for just $5/month! Want more? Upgrade to the $8/month premium tier and get everything above plus The Wayback a day early, ad-free, censor-free, and exclusive bonus content you won’t find anywhere else! http://patreon.com/RyanSickler 📧What’s your story?? Submit at [e-mail] 👕Get Your Merch👕 http://www.bonfire.com/store/ryansickler/ 🎧 Listen to my Podcasts 🎧 The HoneyDew - http://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-honeydew-with-ryan-sickler/id527446250 The Wayback - http://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-wayback-with-ryan-sickler/id1721601479 Patreon - http://www.patreon.com/ryansickler 📣 Follow Me📣 ▪ Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/ryansickler/ ▪ TikTok: http://www.tiktok.com/@ryan.sickler ▪ Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/RyanSicklerOfficial 🕸️ryansickler.com/ 🍈thehoneydewpodcast.com/ 🦀Subscribe to The CrabFeast Podcast🦀 http://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crabfeast-with-ryan-sickler-and-jay-larson/id1452403187 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Buffalo, New York, I'm headed your way. I'll see you guys Friday, April 24th and Saturday, April 25th. Hey, guys, exciting announcement. We are doing a live way back at the Netflix is a joke festival. It's Monday, May 5th, it's 7 p.m. at the hotel cafe main stage. It's our first live ever way back. We're going to have a special guest. We're going to have prizes. We're going to have gifts. We're going to do some fun stuff with you guys as well. So get your tickets now. for the Netflix is a joke festival live way back Monday May 5th 7 p.m. at the hotel cafe. Boston, I'm fired up to head back your way. I'll be there Friday, May 15th and Saturday, May 16th. Albuquerque, New Mexico. I'll be there Friday, June 5th and Saturday, June 6th.

Tulsa, Oklahoma. I'll be there Friday, June 19th and Saturday, June 20th. All tickets on my website at ryan sickler.com Hey guys we have a new segment on the way back called After the Beat. We got a new landline and an old school answer machine and we want to hear from you. Call 323-452-3732

and leave a message. Hit us with things like craziest high school moment. Worst job. Dumbest injury. Worst trouble. Maybe something you got away with. Or maybe you're looking for some old school advice. on relationships, jobs, even am I the asshole?

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We're over here doing it in the Nightpans Studios. I am Ryan Sickler. Thank you guys for supporting this show. I'm very excited to get this thing going today. You know, before I say that, actually, come see me on tour. Get all your tickets on my website at Ryan Sickler.com. That's all we're going to do for the biz right now. I'm very excited to introduce our guest here today.

You know, I say these are the stories behind the storytellers. I'm very excited to have this guest here with us. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Ned Fullmer. Welcome to the honeydew, Ned. Thank you for having me. Thank you for being here, Ned. Before we get into whatever we're going to chat about today, right there, promote everything you'd like, please. Sure, you can follow me at YouTube.com slash Ned Fullmer and check out my podcast, The Rock Bottom Podcast.

All right. Well, we met today. We did. I've read a little history about you. And as I said to you and I walked in, I like to ask and just make sure the stuff, if I read on the internet is true because we had Kevin Neal and I said, hey, man, I read that you had a brother who was murdered at 12 and he's like, that's not fucking true. Which is a horrible thing to put out there.

Pretty big thing to get around. So Ned, let's just start at the beginning for you. Where are you originally from? Tell me about your family. I grew up in Jacksonville, Florida. My dad was a doctor. My mom worked in arts education. And both of them were from New York and Boston.

So I kind of grew up like a fish. out of water in the south what's bringing them down to jackson my dad's job he like got his med school paid for by agreeing to go like wherever just to do public health yeah so kind of random talking to you about duval over there before uh yeah because you guys jacksonville used to be in the raven's division and i was telling you jimmy smith would just beat our ass yeah so i was a very like something else impressionable youth in that time you know eight nine 10 11 years old and it's just for for better or worse I'm a jaguars fan for life now well you got a good squad now that's for sure okay so how and how many siblings you have I have a younger sister okay so the four of you guys

are in Jacksonville and that's where you're growing up that's where you high school all that's the entire time yeah I lived in the same house the entire 18 years of growing up and my parents still have it actually oh yeah okay And then what next? College? What do you do? You had all to do what? I was a bit of a golden boy. I did really well in school. And I went to Yale University actually. Oh shit. You went to Yale. Okay. Yeah. And then after that I did you do well at Yale. That's hard to say. Did you do well at Yale? I did okay. I think my first year was pretty good. And then I started getting more into the, you know, extracurricular like theater and film stuff. Kind of had the detriment of my science classes. I got it. They also had the sign classes like up a big hill.

It's like really, you got to really want to go there at 8.30 in the morning. It's like a 20 minute walk up. It's cold and shit too. Come on, man. Come on. Where's my Zoom class? Yeah, that would have been way better. And so then I, you know, I wanted to be in the entertainment industry and wanted to do comedy, write comedy.

And I had a mentor that said, hey, instead of moving to L.A. right away, you know, get involved in YouTube stuff. If you want to move to Chicago, like move there first, you're never going to go to L.A. and then Chicago, you're probably going to go to Chicago and then L.A. So I lived in Chicago for about five years after graduating, doing a bunch of live shows and writing and started getting involved in making YouTube videos. So were you doing stand-up, improv, a bit of all of it? Improv and stuff.

Yeah, Chicago is the improv. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, were you doing like I.O. West or Seventh City? Yeah, I-O, Second City, the annoyance. I mean, I say West, because that's out here, but I-O. I-O. Improvalent picture. Okay.

And then you're also younger. So, your wheelhouse, so for us, it was always do that and then try to go get on TV. Yeah. It was still, in Chicago, it was still like, oh, the S&L Scouts are coming every summer. Well, years ago, I had a friend from Chicago, and we would watch TV. While we're watching it being Chicago, Chicago, Chicago. But then the fucking commercials will come on. And then she would go, Chicago, Chicago.

I was like, God damn, all that Chicago? I was like, wow. And already what I knew I thought was a lot. And there's just like, bam, bam, bam. I'm like, damn Chicago. But also you've got the, is this the early part of the YouTube starting to get in? So you've got that option as not just TV. You also have this newer thing over here.

Yeah. I remember very distinct. like making this sitcom on campus and then as a you know experiment I split it up into parts and put it on YouTube and when we screen it on campus it's like oh my god wow 200 people are here watching this show and then when we put it on YouTube it's like whoa 20,000 people watched this clip like it was just this um real shock of what these online numbers were like and people were going to tell me to let you talk but I got to ask you one more question at this in Yale to, or do you, are you hearing anything about this, this, are they teaching you or educating

about the YouTube or any podcasting or anything back now? Oh, not really. No, no. It was all geared towards traditional entertainment. Maybe. Is it, is it too, like, low, you know, brow for Yale to have a podcast course? A podcast course. I'm sure they do. They have all sorts of stuff. I remember when I was just back for a reunion, they had a new, like, tech startup area. So that was, that wasn't there. 2009. All right. I'm going to shut the fuck up now. Okay. So you're you moved to Chicago. That's right. You do it. Yeah. All right. And you're doing live shows and and then when do you sort of like stumble or venture into this YouTube lane? Well, I mean, I was doing YouTube in Chicago, but it really kind of picked up when I moved to L.A. and started working for BuzzFeed, which was like a big media

a company really growing a lot in that mid-2010s type of time period. I got married in 2012, and then in fall of 2012 and also into 2013, I had a succession of like two really big health crises that basically made me quit my job. I had to go on disability leave from the... Tell me, what happened? So wait, real quick, how did you meet your wife? We met through a mutual friend. Out here in L.A.? No, in Chicago. Oh, I'm sorry, in Chicago. I met very young, like, when I was 22.

And did you come together out here to LA? Yeah. So then you're just getting settled and trying to get some roots and then health shit hits. Yeah. What do you find out? We got married in June of 2012, and then that October, I guess, I split my knee open so badly, it got infected and got a septic knee. And I was working in a chem lab at the time because my degree actually was in science. and it.

Oh, so you wanted it, bro. You went up that motherfucker hill. Yeah. You went up that. I did. I went up that. That's what I'm talking about. That's right.

That's what I'm talking about. Now, technically I have a Bachelor of Arts in Science. Don't right. Not a Bachelor of Science in Science. You know what's weird? I got a Bachelor of Science in mass communication, bro. That makes no sense. It doesn't at all.

I wanted to be a fucking, I thought I wanted to be a physical therapist. So I started taking human, human anatomy and physiology. Yeah. And then is it got the. I was like, I, I, it's intense. White fucking flag. I'm lost. A lot to memorize.

I'm gonna fucking kill people. I was like, let me just go to TV and movies and film. And so I went over there. So my degree is Bachelor of Science. That's so funny. Because I went heavy on the fucking shit of her. Yeah, I have a BA because I went heavy in the arts. They're like, you have to take two more advanced science classes to get a BS.

I'm like, hell no, I hate doing that. Okay, I'm sorry, go ahead. I'm doing screenwriting. So it was, yeah, I figured that I could always, like, do arts with a science degree, but I couldn't necessarily do science with an arts degree. Okay, so you cut your knee, you go sept, your blood goes septic, you said. Yes, yes, so I was in the hospital for three weeks. I had a friend to happen to this happen.

Yeah. It's just serious, people don't realize. Were you also not up on your tetanus? No, I was. You were? I was. And it still got you. Yeah.

And they said, like, 50 years ago, you would have died because the antibiotics. straight up weren't invented yet. Also, I'm older. Like, when I think 50 years ago, I'm thinking the 40s and shit. Here's the thing. That's like the 70s. Yeah. I know.

That's fucking crazy. This is weird. Yeah, you're like 70s. That's modern medicine, baby. That is modern medicine. I'm here for that. I'm here for that. If I'm here for that, it ain't that old.

Right, right. So you're in there for three weeks. Yeah. And because I was working at this lab that had all these blue collar requirements of like, you must be able to lift 60 pounds to come back to work. So. Did you cut to me on the job? No, no, it was playing paintball with my friends in rural New Hampshire on like a guy's trip.

So I haven't played paintball since then. I don't blame you. Yeah. So we're not on workers' comp. I was basically, no, I was on disability leave, but I wasn't allowed to come back to work. So it was this really like strange kind of depressed sort of time where I'm like doing physical therapy on all these pain killers, like off work, and it's just a really kind of depressing and tough time. I had to quit all my shows and all my, you know, basically everything I was doing.

And then that was in October. Then in February 2013, I find myself back in the hospital this time with like an MS episode, which I didn't know I had. What explain? So MS is multiple sclerosis. What do you mean an episode? What happens? Well, like for many of the cases in relapsing, remitting MS, it can like spike up and then go kind of dormant for a while. So this was, I must have had it and didn't know it, but then it spiked up. And the way it spiked up was like I couldn't, you know, my hands were numb and then my arms were numb. And then my back and my chest were numb. And then my, like, I got weakness in my legs to the point where like I couldn't like hold my body up.

And like I would like, I fell over. And that's when I went to the hospital. So you end up, it's just been in you this whole time lying dormant and this is the first time it's introducing itself to you. Right. Right. And you go in and there like you have MS. Sort of. Yeah. You have to technically have it like two different moments in time to be definitively diagnosed with MS. But I was diagnosed with the precursor to MS called something else. And so then when's the next time you feel something? Fortunately, I didn't feel anything. But they did like a new.

a scan revealed new disease activity that winter. So that's when I officially had MS. I see. And is that a brain on the brain scan? Yeah, it's your, it's an MRI in your brain. It reveals these little spots called lesions. Like the white matter or something like that. Yeah, kind of.

Yeah, it's like your, you know, your brain has the axons and the dendrites and all of these, you know, neurons and they're covered. You're talking to the right guy. Yeah. All right. Yeah, there you go. anatomy and physiology. That's for science, right?

You talked to the right. Your neurons... Or synapses and bi. Exactly. I don't matter for all the lobes and cortexes and shit. I know. So there's like insulation to these wires called myelin. And that's what MS is is like kind of eats away the insulation.

Kind of like a rat chewing at your, chewing at your wires there. So it's your own body. What age are you when you are officially diagnosed? The second one. I guess I'm, it was all on 2013 February and then December. So 12 years ago. I guess I was 25. 15 years ago. So you're a very young man to find this out. Yeah. And at this time, can they tell you what like varying degree you have and what the progressions showed? Like, are they able to help you with your future? A little bit. But part of living with MS is dealing with that fear of like, I know it's going to get worse someday. I know I might be in a wheelchair someday. But I don't know when or how or what, what, how bad it's going to be. But also, you can get hit by bust. No, look at it. Let's be positive.

of, Ned. Okay. Let's be positive. That's what helps me is realize there's a bunch of other ways. There are. There are. However, just 50 years ago, a medication, or excuse me, a, what is it, a, for your blood, that shit was created to save your life.

Yeah. How old right now? 38. I mean, maybe if when 30 years, if this rears its ugly head, by then they got a shot for this shit or a chip they put in your fucking skin. I mean, even though, instead of you just walking out in front of buses and shit, and shit and two years later they make it. Could you imagine?

Two years later like, MS. It's cured. God, dang it. But I really needed to get to the other side of the street. So how does that fuck with you? Well, it was a lot of fear. And it was this really sudden shift of being able-bodied

to being essentially paralyzed. And fortunately, they inject me up with a whole bunch of steroids. They, like, do this thing where they put two tubes in your natural. in your neck. Yeah, yeah. They pull the blood out of you, strip the plasma, and then put it back into you

with artificial plasma. Because the plasma is like where all the antibodies are. So supposedly that's supposed to help you. And did. Does your family then go get tested to see genetically if any one of them has it and who the hell gave your shit to you? No, I guess we didn't do that.

I don't know that it's like so explicitly genetic. You know, it's not like blue eyes or brown eyes or something. It's like I think your male children are slightly more, but it's not like 50% chance. It's like, you know. Okay. Yeah. Maybe, you know, goes from 1% likely to 2% likely or something like that.

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Just head to Ridge.com and use code Honeydew. do and you're all set. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Now, let's get back to the due. So when are you healthy enough to sort of get back to life and work? Yeah, it took about, I mean, I was in the hospital for another three weeks. So it was kind of like this back-to-back thing that really just disrupted my life.

So maybe like March. And then at that point, I'm like quitting, I've quit all the show, like I was in a musical or I was in an improv. It's like, I've quit all of my nighttime shows. I'm sort of coming back to work, but then I'm like, what am I doing in this job? So that's kind of when I formulated the decision to like move to Los Angeles to just try to be in a larger entertainment market. Okay. And at that time, you and your wife come here? Yeah.

And do you have kids yet? No. when do you start trying to have kids? And are you also terrified that, A, you could not be able to take care of them and, B, this might be something you give them? Yeah, for sure. I mean, I think for many years, the way I dealt with it was just to like push it way down and just kind of be in denial.

Because once I was able to walk again, I was like the sensory symptoms that I have ongoing are just kind of like numbness and tingling in my hands my brain is more or less able to ignore it which is great and awesome um you know for five six years i was on an injectable and that that that was basically the only time i had to think about it was like once every 48 hours you're doing that yourself yeah yeah and it's like really painful and i'd sometimes like cry and like smash my pillow and just be really like upset and frustrated but i i didn't you know i think i really pushed it down and so much so i didn't talk about it. I didn't tell anyone about it. I was new in LA and it's new starting a new job at BuzzFeed and like I didn't want anyone to know. I didn't want to like be people to sort of

just have that be the only thing they knew about me or I didn't want like the, you know, because I was also had this thing where I was like off work and I had to come back to work. And it's like I didn't want my bosses to like know that I was potentially going to go back to the hospital and miss months. I just wanted to. to kind of do my job. So yeah, it was, it was a real interruption in my life that fortunately, I guess, led me to Los Angeles, but really, you know, it took,

it's taken me the better part of a decade to become a lot more comfortable with it as a diagnosis and as something that I'm like comfortable talking about in conversation. I just know how I am and I found out I have wild health shit too. I didn't find out I had a genetic blood disease to us 42. So when you feel numbness, do you fucking have a little bit of a, like, you ever sit on a toilet too long and you get up and your legs don't work? Do you fucking, are you worried that they're just going to stay like that?

Yeah. Here they come. Here they come. They're coming back. No, for sure. I mean, if it gets worse, it's like, oh, no, is this some new basis? line that I had to get used to. It's timing out longer before it, I recover.

Yeah, because it fluctuates, right? Yeah. It'll fluctuate with temperature or stress. I was going to ask, is there a time you notice more that it shows itself as stress? Hot, cold, temperature, like alcohol, stress. Hot, cold, huh? Most people, it's hot, but I find it for cold as well. Okay, so now you and your wife at the time is also in, is she also in entertainment as well?

No, she's more in like the design. and, you know, loves, like, vintage stuff and curating, like, decorative accessories. She worked for, like, a vintage reseller as a buyer in L.A. All right. And so what happens to you guys? I start working for BuzzFeed, and then we suddenly become famous. And why? Well, it's right place, right time, I guess.

But, I mean, BuzzFeed was experimenting with doing a bunch of things. different viral videos and I was part of that, you know, crew making stuff and trying to test stuff out and have things spread on the internet. And she was comfortable jumping into that world and doing making content and stuff. She became more and more comfortable when she realized that it was like a lot more easy of a way to put her stuff out there than like client work, which I think was. Okay. So she's not dropping this and going to this. She's not dropping this. implementing me i'm bringing my shit with me and i'm gonna promote yeah totally and i there was at one point like i designed a show all around like her redesigning rooms and you know kind of put that out there

as like a content so that people could start to see her in that way and so i know you guys did couple stuff together and you were you know working as a married couple in your content yeah they're not separately you would work together yeah it's early on i made i think in one of the very first try guys videos, I make some reference to like, oh, I have to leave the shoot early because I have a date night with my wife. And then it became this catchphrase of like, my wife, my wife, my wife. And then we'd like lean into it and like make more jokes about it. But then it really became seemingly something that I was known for. And when I looked at what I was posting on social media, the stuff, like as a couple or being like all cutesy, like would get way more engagement than stuff with just me or

just doing whatever um so i just did more of it so as a content creator is working in the public eye and stuff as a merry couple together did you find it difficult to like did you ever just go to fucking dinner to go to dinner or do you always fucking doing something with the phone or a camera or whatever and and like where do you guys try to draw that line so it's not so blurred where you can have something for you guys that isn't for every fucking one. else. I don't think we drew that line very well. I mean, I think we had pretty blurry boundaries. Eventually, we started to, like, taper off the types of stuff we would feature our kids in as they started becoming, like, less of a baby and more of a toddler. But, you know, in general, like,

I always felt this, like, pressure to post and to show, you know, the more, like, rosy side of my relationship and family and it it you know over time it became just really exhausting and kind of made it further and further away from like the truth of what was happening in my life and in my relationship and I think that like disconnect um really was something that was hard for me to deal with and what was really happening I mean it was not as perfect as Show it on Instagram. I don't think anyone's relationship is. No, that's what this, that's what we all say this whole show is about.

Like, I got sick of everyone's. Yeah. You know, I say their ESPN top 10 play. I'm so tired of your highlights. Yeah. And we all have the worst times in our life, you know. This episode is brought to you by Tell Us Online Security. Oh, tax season is the worst.

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have children and then you've got to start drawing lines. And this is also like I don't envy you guys either. new, you know, territory and it's a new frontier with all this shit and how will they do that's maybe 100 years from now. People would be like, oh, this is the best way to do this with your kids on social media. Right. People are still trying. I've had Chris Hansen sit right there in that fucking seat and tell me about Roblox and wild shit that these predators are doing with our kids just by seeing them online.

And I wanted to ask, did you ever have any weirdos or stuff? Because once you put your life out there, people can figure out where the fuck you are these days where you live where kids go to school did you ever ever have any issues with that somebody came to the old try guys office one time to like drop off a gift because they like found the location which was my old rental house was it a real gift or was it like a fucking no it was a weird gift i mean it was a real gift not a hand or anything like that okay i just well make sure probably like a long letter or maybe something a handmade art um and you know that's that's sweet and it indicates like that our work had reached people, which is always the goal as an artist to make stuff that

affects people. But, you know, a little, it does make you feel a sense of lack of safety when someone shows up to this, you know, the office. Never had anything with the kids, fortunately. Good. That's, yeah. So are you comfortable? I said to you out there before we recorded, you were, I guess, caught cheating in a public way. Is that accurate? Is that right? Are you comfortable telling us what happened and how that went down? Sure. It's a pretty well-known story, so there's nothing to hide, really. Okay, fair enough.

As I said, I ask everyone if it's true or not now. Yeah, because I'm sure everything that's online about this isn't also 100% true. Well, that's true, yeah, for sure. So I'd like to hear it from you. Yeah. I was having an affair with my producer, who was employee of the production company that I owned and operated. We got caught together on a, you know, making out on a dance floor after a hairy styles

concert. Where? On a business trip in New York. Oh, in New York, not out here. Yeah, sort of. And got by who? Like fans who recognized me or her. Oh, so you were spotted.

You weren't just a rando up there. Yeah, you know. And so how does that get? okay who finds out first then because this this is interesting that you don't know does your wife find out first or do you find out first that this is out there um it's sort of well it wasn't out there to start it it really i think i pretty much all the important people in our life found out simultaneously by this person sending it to you know my ex-wife her ex-fiance say, other people that we worked with in our office. Yeah, I think they just kind of sent it everywhere. So I, you know, that was like, for me, that was immediately the moment where I'm having

to tell my ex-wife everything that I've been happening and what was, you know, the extent of, you know, what this photo meant and what it was. It was a photo, not a little video clip or anything. Yeah, it was actually, it was like a screenshot. screen grab from a video. So I have questions for you, Ned. How old are the kids at the time? One and four, I guess.

Okay. What's this? We fall 2022. So two and five, two and five. And when and how do you find out this photos out there? Like the next day? Is it that same night? You know, the first thing was Ariel, my ex-wife's Ford,

me an email of somebody like sending like a you know a DM through an email uh just like describing how they saw uh us and that night yeah pretty quickly yeah so that's kind of something that um i knew that it was like we're going to have to have a like conversation about it and at that point i've been going on for a while so in a lot of ways i was kind of relieved uh to be able to talk about it which is a fucked up thing to say but uh was was the truth it's like you know i sometimes think subconsciously i must have wanted to get caught because then you're are forced to stop living a double life and start to come to terms with why you're doing it and what it means for your life and at the time you're in new york so you know you still got to go all the way back to

california to have this conversation it's not like you're driving home and we're talking tonight. Yeah, well, it was an awkward thing that actually she was coming to meet me and we were going to go to a wedding in New Jersey for some family friends. So I tell her all this is on the phone. No, I wanted to talk about it in person, which maybe was a mistake because she really was very, very upset and wanted to immediately get on a plane and go back to Los Angeles. while I went to this family wedding. So she did come to New York? Mm-hmm.

And she already knew then, and you're like, please come so we can talk? No, no. No. You waited until she got there. Yeah. And then you told her. Yeah. Because I was under a delusion that it wasn't as big of a deal as it was.

There were some. Why? What made you think that? Well, there were ways that we had talked about certain. like boundaries and things that would be okay versus not and you know this was not but it was close and I was you know delusionally thinking like oh well since we've talked about these other things that this is probably fine and I think there's there's a lot of different ways that when you're cheating or when I was cheating specifically that I lied to myself to to make it seem more okay in my mind

now I'm going to ask you questions and if you're like now I don't want to answer that or you don't want us to put it in, that's fine too. But the lady you're cheating with. Yeah. Is she married or does she have family or is there anyone in her life? She was engaged. She was engaged. Yeah.

And part of what was so destructive as her fiancé actually caught us like early on and then we stopped for a while and then. And he didn't tell your wife? No. No. How early on? Pretty much right. the beginning when you say caught you how did he catch you um like saw some stuff on her phone and did he call you or confront you yep what did he say i he don't did you see oh was it to your

face or did he call he called me and did he already know you were you friendly sort of i mean we friendly with your wife you guys we she we had even worked together back at buzzfeed so we'd known each other for the better part of you know eight years or so um I don't I don't really remember But he was very upset And so it was like oh And you stopped for a bit But you didn't stop

Yeah eventually we started You know Seeing each other again And how would you How would you get away with it? We went on a lot of business trips Okay You're not sneaking here there

You're going on business trips She's the producer that is like Setting everything up and I don't know Guys Ridge Wallet is back. I've been a fan of Ridgewallet for a long time. This is my third one. And when I found out they had NFL teams, you know I jumped on the greatest team in football, the Baltimore Ravens. I used to have my wallet. I was a guy that would sit, you know, in my back pocket. My back's

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what is that fucking like that's got to be the worst fucking thing ever yeah it was a real like is the music with her too no she's okay they're their home in l-a being watched no she says like oh i saw this like like where you like this person sent me this message were you like in new york with your sister or something like uh and i was like no i was with this person like oh oh and you know then said like how long i'd been going on for and what the extent of it was and you know that was really when it was i think she you know was like turned this car around and you're in the car dude were you going to the wedding driving to the hotel to kind of get ready for and you just took her to the airport i just yeah turn the car around took her to the

to to an airport hotel man yeah i got to say i've really feel terrible for your wife right now i don't mean to make no high along but i mean also like i got to get on a flight now fly back to six hours to l.a thinking about this shit like and what's going to happen to my life and my kids and do i stay do i go is that the only thing he's lying i mean you know And you go to the wedding? Yes. Okay. That's, I mean, listen, you should.

You shouldn't just bail on this wedding. I don't know, actually. I don't really fucking know. I mean, I didn't go to most of it, but I went to the actual ceremony. Were you in it? Like, were you in? No, it was like a family friend. Yeah, yeah.

So then you go back to L.A., obviously. You go back home. Yeah. Is she there or you kicked out of the house? Like, you know, how does that go first? I lived in a hotel for. You did. couple days and and what's going on with your uh the ladies situation and is he coming after you

again because he already fucking said hey man i he definitely did that weekend um he tried to show up where you were well he threatened me and called me and stuff but um he basically i tell my ex-wife that I want to work through things and cut off contact with the affair partner. And how would you do that if you're employed together? So are you quitting a job? Is she quitting a job or how is that work? I didn't. I don't.

You didn't even. You're like whatever. I was like, I don't know if I have to work from home for the next year. I don't know. It doesn't. And can you tell me about your ex? Is she, well, let me ask it. like this, is she a Latina or is she just fucking processing?

You know what I'm saying? Are you having anything thrown at you? Are you in danger of being stabbed? You know what I'm saying? Or is she like, when she said turn this car around right now, did she say it like that or were we in a different octave? You know what I'm saying? No, she's not a Latina, but it was very, it was devastating for her.

And it was really emotional. That, you know, is she, I don't want to make her now try to look like it. But I'm saying her reaction, whatever is justify. I'm being, is she yelling or is she like a quiet, like just leaving and not talking? No, yelling, you know what I mean? Crying. And that was really like the thing for me that was like, oh, this is, you are totally like, this is in no way. Okay, this is really hurting this person that you care a lot of.

out. And obviously you're married and you have children, so you fall up in things before naturally normally, but this is something you're seeing a whole new, like, oh, fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So you want to try to work it out.

Does she at first? Does she? Because you did say you're asked. She doesn't. She doesn't know for a while. You know, I think it took us the better part of two years to really decide whether. we were going to continue working on it or not. All right, let's talk about that two years.

Yeah. How do you co-parent together? And what are you doing? Are you back in the house? Are you like, what do you, what's the, you know, what's the setup? So I live out of the back house for a some time. Like we have a little ADU. So it's kind of, you know, mommy and daddy in separate bedrooms.

All right, but you're on the property. And if there's an emergency or something, they're right there. Yeah. You're allowed to go in and put them to bed or anything? Yeah, we're doing it a lot together as we're doing therapy and working through it. You just stay the fuck out there when it's time. Yeah, at the evening. Yeah.

Okay. You know, and then there's about a month goes by, but then it starts, it goes from like a private thing that we're working through to a very public thing where I, you know, very publicly get fired from my job. And that kind of creates this shit storm of. This whole time we're talking about right now wasn't public and wasn't... No, no. I thought immediately it did. I'm sorry. I got you.

But yeah, it was about a month. Okay. And how does, okay, but because you get fired, that's what propels the story into the media. Yeah, I started like getting cut out of content. And people are like, hey, that's weird. And then, you know, it kind of all blows up. And that's a whole new level of now. Me and her weren't sure if I was getting fired or not or what was happening.

And then it was kind of really a surprise for for both of us, which was tough to deal with. Okay. So now this is out there everywhere, which has got to make your wife also feel like great. Yeah. Now the world fucking knows about this shit. Yeah. So is that a whole new level of? Yeah, it was a, you know, and now there's trolls like saying like, oh, I slept with him too.

And she's like, well, now I don't know what's true or not. So with the advice of our therapists, we go and like, I wanted to ask. You guys were in therapy at the time too. Yeah. Okay, good. A couple's therapy and individual therapy. So I actually go to like a to live at like a like a facility, like a, you know, sort of like a rehab type of place. Okay.

To just be like what's this call a therapeutic separation to have some time of not. Not because they're telling you you're a sex addict or any of this stuff and you need to be over here. but this is a safe place to go get your shit together for a bit. Right, right, right. Okay. And although being around, like, addiction and people who are working through, like, eating disorders or alcoholism. Gambling. Yeah, there's a lot of stuff.

Or just, you know, people that are super depressed or, like, suicide. Like, it was all really interesting and powerful and, like, healing for me to be able to so openly talk. about how I fucked my whole life up. Visit BetMGM Casino and check out the newest exclusive. The Price is Right Fortune Pick. BetMDM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly. 19 plus to wager. Ontario only.

Please play responsibly. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact Connects Ontario at 1-866-531-2,600 to speak to an advisor. Free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. And it was, you know, kind of being able to view even just like having an affair through the lens of like addictive cycles and stuff. It was really helpful for me to understand like why it was so hard to, you know, not see this person and things like that. So it was a really, really helpful and really healing time.

And there was such a shitstorm on the internet that like I just needed to completely like unplug from everything. So to actually be in a place where my phone is literally like in a lockbox. I see. Not able to be like. I forget about like just how accessible every fucking thing is in the world these days from the palm of our hand sometimes. You know? And even by habit I'm looking at the weather.

I'm still looking at something, you know? Yeah. man okay so now it's public you lose your job um we do our our stay where are you headed next when you get out so after and i'm sorry and how is do you have in-laws out here how who's helping with the kids and stuff um yeah in-laws and friends um we're all pretty helpful during that time period all right so you had a good support system for the children that's always important okay yeah and it was we were getting this kind of therapeutic like process of you know the couples therapists each of our individual therapists um and part of that is to basically write out all the things that i did and

all of the like secrets i had been keeping and then to kind of communicate that in one sitting so then she knows exactly what's like true and what's not and that's kind of like a baseline that you can rebuild your sense of like sense of trust off of because we knew or at least I think both of us even if we weren't sure we wanted to be romantically together knew that we wanted to be like have a friendship and a co-parenting relationship so that was really helpful and it was about three months of time so that's I mean I'm going to be honest with you that's pretty quick for a lady who was I'm talking about your ex caught off guard by all of this Like that's impressive that she could, you know, Latina were looking six, eight months.

Man, my mom. Might be forever. It might be a grudge. I mean, the group therapy at the place that I went to, I continued to do for like six, nine months. So what are the personal consequences? And, you know, God, I mean, I haven't thought of this either. Like, your children are young, but someday they're going to read that shit. They're going to see that.

I hadn't thought of that either. Like, what is, it's a new world for this. this kind of thing too. How do you deal with that? It's devastating. I mean, it's, it's, everything I knew about my life kind of collapsed in the span of a weekend or a month. That's wild to think of it said that. So like, you know, no wonder I didn't, it wasn't like I had anywhere to be to go to like eight hours of therapy every day. Why do you think you cheated? I think I cheated because I was selfish and I was unhappy and I didn't have the tools to understand that unhappiness and that emptiness and it was easier to, you know, kind of fill that void with something external. And then once it started happening, it kind of becomes like a runaway train where it's like, you know, you're, you're, you're,

body chemistry and all of those things that make people like fall in love with each other and like all of that kind of gets hijacked to there where it just feels like you know you're living or dying based off of uh anyways were you in love with this other lady you just mentioned love were you in love with that lady i i thought i was at the time for sure and now looking back on it i think to myself, like, how can you really love someone if you're in this kind of, it's, you know, a relationship built on secrecy and sneaking around and not anything that's like kind of. You're loud and proud about or look at my wonderful partner. Yeah. Or it's just, you know, you don't have that grounding of what I think a true loving relationship needs to be built on. Certainly you don't have that sense of honesty.

I felt a sense of aliveness and a sense of my, like, was feeling good about my life for the first time in a while. But it doesn't, that's like kind of a temporary, like, now afterwards in like rebuilding those pieces of my life, I've kind of had to just build that from the inside out without any kind of external connection. to do that. But yeah, I mean, I think that my whole life I did everything that was expected of me and had all this achievement and success. And then you look back one day and you feel super empty about everything. And you're like, what else is there in life? That's what happened to me at least.

Without maybe naming anyone, anyone turn on you that surprised you. and vice versa. Anyone really come through where you were like, like, for example, maybe her dad was like, hey, look, you're the father of these kids and blah, blah, I don't know, I'm making that up, but I'm asking. Is there anyone both ways? Anyone really like, man, I really thought I could, you know, lean on this person even if I fucked up and no and the other way around. Yeah. I mean, for sure. But my friend group and a lot of our friends, like as couples, were really, really supportive of just, hey, like, we understand you're working through a lot and that there's, you know, that Ned that you fucked up. And also, like, we love both of you and I hope you do and kind of figure it out in the way that's best for you. And I think her parents, like, shared that sentiment of, you know, we're going to take our lead from our daughter and are they together. Because your parents were together. Are they together her parents? Yeah, both are. What's it like? You're a dad. What's it like the first?

time you see her dad after all. Yeah. Do you remember that? Not easy. Yeah, not easy. I apologized. And is that why you went over to see him? Are you seeing him at like something else?

You're like, can I please have a conversation? I think we were all on a family trip to Big Bear together. Oh, God, dude, in the same car and shit? No, but in the same house. And that's where you talked about it? Yeah. Once there was a moment where they were alone, I went to talk and apologize. Oh, was her.

mom and dad together you did this it was yeah and how did that go i think um they accepted my apology and and took their cues from their daughter um so i think you know they were hurt but also supportive of the kind of work that we were doing together to build a new sense of family life um how long goes this now Three and a half years. Yeah, three years. And you don't have to answer this at all, but I'm curious, has your wife started dating and how has that been meeting that person if you have?

You know, I think that's her story to tell. Fair enough. Have you started dating again? Yeah, I've started dating. You have. What would you say is the biggest lesson you learned from this? I mean, honesty and authenticity that it's like much more. important to be truthful about like painful things and is to try to you know hide something so that

someone feels better like you know this this all would have been it still would have been painful but if if I had had the courage or the kind of awareness to be able to say like hey, this XYZ isn't going well for me and I'm feeling this and I want to do this. But I think it's hard to be knowing that at the time. And sometimes you just have these negative feelings and don't really know what they mean. And this was how I dealt with them. And it was horribly painful and destructive for so many people. I mean, that's not just my ex-wife, but all of the people involved, you know, people at my office that I used to work at.

I forget about the whole work thing, too. Yeah, there's all those people there. Yeah, it's kind of like a small family, right? like um and and then there were everyone out like the public that had been following our story and our relationship um you know then they felt a sense of betrayal as well i'm sure and there's a lot of a lot of pain all around and i had to come to terms with the fact that i had caused it and it was because i was selfish and like keeping secrets and talk to me about the relief i know you said even though it's fucked up, like, the, you finally, you know, it's over.

Yeah. The secret's out. You can let this go because do you think you would have ever told? I was, oh, I think for sure because I was like, there was so many moments where I almost tell her or try to like tell her just so many like just skirt around it, but tell like almost. Yeah. I mean, I was losing my mind. I mean, you've got two young kids, a wife, this job. I know this business is fast-paced boom-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo production.

You've got to hear in a new company that's just taken off. Yeah, I'll bet you're fucking losing your shit. So there's a small part of you that's just like, okay. Yeah. Yeah. And I remember before it happened, we like released this very adorable cookbook together called the date night cookbook. And we're on a press tour promoting it.

And we're like doing all these. really cute things during the day and like taking selfies with fans. You're taking part. You're taking part. Yeah. Appreciate that. You made that chicken porn? I love it, bro.

Anyways. Yeah, I mean, it was just the biggest disconnect of like, forget about all that too because you're just cute and cuply during the day. Yeah, you're built you built that together though too. that too i think about that like yeah yeah it's right you you took it off and then you built that together okay so let's talk about that too obviously these things fall apart and stuff but do you two even consider working together again in any capacity um sure there's like some projects even some projects we're still doing where it's like maybe it's she's more on camera and i'm more behind the scenes or

stuff like that. But I think we both knew that that kind of on-camera being cute together was both not possible anymore and not something we wanted to do. I mean, that disconnect between being cute

during the day and then feeling like isolated and alone at night. It's like really challenging to deal with. And as hard as it was to have it all be out in the open at least then there wasn't anything that I was like hiding anymore and I can just kind of

exist as myself and just to just try to build up myself as wet best as I can. It's all so fucking interesting in a horrible way to the get caught like this. Like what a world we live in these days too where, you know, obviously when the cold play thing hits, are you, are you also the internet's a forever. a dick, I always say. Are you just, are you going to be trolled forever? Probably. When this comes out, there's no doubt, according, I'm guessing for you, there's going to be some people in there dropping shit about that. Yeah, I'm going to get, do you still, anything you do, anything you do now, do you still, even if it's a hundred comments or there's still three or four in there that's

some shit about that? Yeah. Yes. It'll forever, huh? It'll follow you. Yeah. That's a new thing in the world, too. You don't get to, you can't even like start over somewhere else. because that digital footprint follows you. I never even thought of that. Yeah. You know, some doctor in fucking Louisiana loses his license. He's moving out to Washington State and starting over as a dentist. You can't do this shit anymore.

Like, you know, that guy used to fucking be? You can't do it anymore. Yeah, no, you have to just be like this is who I am now. And hopefully it connects with people. And if not, it is what it is. I'm going to continue to ask you a few questions here, Ned. That's cool. Through this process, do you learn,

that maybe you're not suited for the married life. Do you maybe prefer multiple partners? And you know what I mean? Like, or are you scared to hurt someone? So you just casually date. Like, where are you in the realization of who you are as a preference moving forward? Would you ever be married again? Things like that.

Yeah, I definitely have noticed in my dating life that I'm much more like, I'll, I'll, say what's happening even to my detriment. I think someone broke up with me because I was like, just, you know, just so we're clear. Like, I know you're dating other people and I'm dating other people. She's like, yeah, I know that, but why do you have to say that? I'm like, well, because it's important to me. A case my dick starts burning, I want to know who the fuck on your side gave that shit to be, unless it's my side.

So I think I'm a lot more upfront and, whether, you know, if some of the people I've dated are E&M or in more that like Polly type of circle and that's like being being a lot more upfront and transparent about what it is where you're at and where they're at, I think it's been really healthy and helpful for me. I'm still not sure if that's like for me. I mean, that's, that's, you know, it's there's only so many, like, I'm a pretty involved dad, and that leaves, like, not that much time to date or whatever. So, like, some people are like, oh, I have four partners. I'm like, how?

What? How do you do that? Well, you're a young man. Would you consider marriage again? I would. You would? I would. Kids?

More kids? Or are you done with kids? I mean, I'm not out here searching for kids, but I'm, you know. But the door's not closed on the right person. I'd be open to the conversation. I think so. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

And these days now, you and your wife, I call it my daughter's mom and I, professional. We're very professional. We work very well together and stuff like that. Are you guys on good enough terms to do that now? I think we're a great team. And I'm really grateful for all of the work that we did together and that work that I did in that, like, crisis time, kind of going to the, you know, the therapy facility. and just kind of really working through it. Because, yeah, now we're able to, like, go on trips together.

Like, we spent all of August in Greece together having this wonderful experience for the kids where we're just, you know, living in a three-bedroom apartment with two separate bedrooms. And the kids go to school in Greece. And we're kind of each taking little trips here and there, but mostly able to, I don't know, provide this new sense of family, even though it's different. from the others i guess we've realized that maybe we're better as friends and co-parents than romantic partners um tell me about you do something with AEW i did you wrestled i did i did i wrestled in a real match yeah actually for real yeah again too was a tag team was a one-on-on-on-one

they coddled me quite good yes it was a three-person tag team even they're coddling i'm still watching these guys get fucked up. Right. I felt like I had it was in a car accident the next day. Like my back was fucked up for about two months. Like what happened to your body? Yeah, my whole training was like getting slag. Yeah, it was like my whole back was stiff for,

well, two days for like my entire back. But yeah, there's one muscle in my back that was like months. It's still probably not quite right. Anyways, yeah, the whole practicing is like getting slammed over and over again. your whole brain is telling you to not hurt yourself. Why did you do that? I just, I knew it was going to be a good... Did it come your way or is this something you sought out?

It's something that I sought out. You did want to do this. That's AEW formed in my hometown of Jacksonville. Oh, is that right? I figured they might be a little as the upstart, a little more approachable than WWE. And I knew that was, you know, for the new season of stuff I was doing like the kind of unscripted challenge style content that I love to make.

I wanted to do like big spectacle, high intensity stuff. So I did something in a fighter jet like stunt plane. Listen, no offense. That's cool. But you're just sitting there in a plane. I know they're Jeep, whatever. That's the same as a boot to the motherfucker. Well, that's true.

That's true. That's true. So do you have a wrestling background at all? Did you high school wrestle? anything. Maybe for one day, yeah, in high school.

And you just went in there and they, so what did you get to do that? What I learned was it was about wrestling, yes, but they're basically all just theater geeks with muscles. Yeah.

Like they just love a show and I love a show. They love the dress, the robes, the boas, all of it, the glasses, the hair. Yeah,

it's been fantastic for a long time. I also knew that I was a villain. Yeah. Even if you didn't want to be, you are now, maybe it would be fun to wear a sparkly outfit and be a villain. And when you get in, do people recognize you and booing you and shit?

So here's the thing. Because I was from Jacksonville, they cast me as the hometown hero, actually. So I prepped all of these like being a villain lines. And then at the 30 minutes before they're like, nope, you're going to be on the good guys team. I was like, oh no. But in Jacksonville, you guys do is say do, all. And everyone, you know, loves. I think a few people recognize me and were booing me. Okay. All right. Mostly it was the other guys, like the heels were very good at getting booze.

So made our job easy. All right. Well, dude, thank you for doing this. I'm sure it's not easy to sit there and be that vulnerable. And again, tell the fucking world everything about what happened in your life. But I appreciate it. Yeah. Thanks for spending some time with me.

Yeah, bud. My question, last question is advice. After everything we've talked about, what are you telling 16-year-old Nev Fulmer? You know, I think I would tell 16 year old me to really try to stay true to yourself and to not always try to people please or to kind of do things to get other people's approval. I think that's always something that's been really hard for me. And something that I'm learning now as I'm getting older and practicing boundaries and getting better at it. But that's like, that's, I think, what I would tell my younger self is to, you know, stay true to yourself and don't be afraid to say hard things, even if they're going to be uncomfortable to say or hear. All right. That's great. One more time right there. Promote anything you'd like, please.

Sure. Check out the Rock Bottom podcast. It's stories of people's lowest moments, how they overcame them. Can I ask you as your wife done it yet? Have you when your wife done an episode? Okay, good. All right. Which was, well, I don't know. People didn't seem to like it. Listen, listen, did you guys?

That's really all that bad. It's funny. Like, she's not so tapped into online. She's like, oh, how's the podcast doing? I'm like, everyone, it's not going well. Like, where have you been? Like, I'm getting destroyed out there. You look great.

But, no, I mean, we had this idea to kind of tell her story through the rock bottom show. But I think it was, I think we like just skipped ahead. It was both reactivating that really painful moment for people in a way where people were like, oh, maybe you should keep this private. And like skipping all of the steps of how we dealt with it and like how we're able to sit in a room and chat and laugh and be friendly. Well, look, no offense when I say, I do think more of us should keep our shit private,

myself included. However, kudos to your wife and you also because you started on a camera and sort of did that thing. So even though it was a fucked up thing and it hurt you guys and a lot of people, the fact that you two could sit down together and do that, I think is pretty impressive. Yeah. A lot of people would have dodged that and said, now, fuck off. I'm not doing that or whatever. That's got to be uncomfortable to sit and do. So good for you guys.

Yeah, we figured the only way out of it was through it. and then we're always going to get questions and just to have this uncomfortable hour, two hours, where we just talk about it all. Who knows? Who knows how people are allowed to respond however they want? There's no right answer. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Thank you for doing this, too. Yeah, thanks for having me. As always, Ryan Sickler, on all your social media, we'll talk to you all next week.