The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Andy Roy

Episode Date: February 17, 2020

My HoneyDew this week is Andy Roy! Andy is a former professional skateboarder who talks about coming up through the ranks to become pro. Along the way he made some bad choices that lead to addiction, a life of crime, and ultimately prison. Andy shares stories about prison life, gnarly places to inject heroin and a desire to get his teeth knocked out in a fight. It’s a Dewzie! Sponsors: - Hurry to http://upstart.com/honeydew to find out HOW LOW your Upstart rate is! - Go to http://omaxhealth.com and enter code HONEYDEW to get 20% off CryoFreeze and sitewide.

This episode is brought to you by OMAX and Upstart. More on that later. Let me tell you about some dates. This Saturday, I'm at the Ice House in Pasadena. Josh Potter will be out there with me, plus some other special guests. March 19th through the 21st, I'm at the Phoenix House of Comedy. March 26th, La Jolla Comedy Store. April 3rd, I'm at the Rec Room in Huntington Beach.

And April 23rd through the 25th, I'll be in Vancouver. Go to ryansickler.com, check out the date, sign up for my email, and you'll get all that info there. You're listening to The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler. Welcome back to The Honeydew, y'all. We're over here at Studio Jeans, doing it at your mom's house. I'm Ryan Sickler. If you go to the Starbucks in this neighborhood, I'm Brian Sickler.

Website, ryansickler.com. Ryan Sickler on all social media. Go sign up for my newsletter over there on the website. And I've got some dates coming up. I'm coming to Phoenix. I'm coming to, oh, God, this year, where am I going? Baltimore. I'm going to be in New York.

I'm going to be in Minneapolis. I'm going to be in Edmonton. I'm going to be in Vancouver. I'm going to be coming to some other towns too. So go over to the website. Check out the dates now. I think Phoenix, I'm in March. So get over there.

Let's get that going. All right. Uh, the website here, the honeydewpodcast.com that's where you find links to everything, the merch, the social media, all that stuff. And, um, again, I'm, I love all the messages. I can't keep up with them. So I'm beyond flattered. I love that you guys are digging this show. It's, it it's growing the audience is growing everything's happening uh so thank you for supporting the show uh i know everybody out there is going through some shit so you know what we like to do here i like to highlight the low lights as i always say these are the stories behind the storytellers and today our storyteller i'm very excited to have here uh please welcome andy roy yeah yeah yeah andy roy's

here everybody welcome to the honeydew andy roy thank you for having me yeah thank you for being here our our good friend uh stephen randolph said hey man this dude's down and you gotta have him on and we've been trying to make it happen so thank you yes of course and before we get into anything as we have a lot to talk about, please promote, plug, everything you'd like. All right. Like I was telling you earlier, my girl gave me a list of stuff to say, and I left it. Here, come up on that mic. My memory is about as long as my downstairs, and that ain't very long.

You know, so Rip Ride Podcast. I got a Rip Ride Podcast. All right, you got it. You go at rip ride podcast with andy roy um andy roy 18 is my instagram uh i do these dear andy this advice column um you could go on my link or whatever bio some stuff i'm like computer illiterate so i don't know like all the names or whatever my girl like helps me out with all that. She did help you out. Yeah, she does everything. She did her job.

Yeah, I'm out. Yeah, I have no idea. Do you have a website, a main website you can go to see all this stuff? AndyRoy18, I think, at Yahoo.com, right? I don't know. He said it right. He said it right to me. I'm asking you.

Yeah, do you know? AndyRoy18 at Yahoo, right? Dot com. Yeah. And there's like a link and a bio and Instagram 18. Yeah. All right. Yeah.

That's it. Yeah. All right. Well, thank you. Good luck. Good luck, everybody. Look at that. Andy, thank you. Good luck. Good luck, everybody. Look at that. Andy Roy, 18.

If you could just type that stuff on a keyboard. There it is. There you go. Bam. There you go. All right. Come up on that mic here. And please, let's just talk about your history.

Where are you from originally? I was born in Antioch california that's contra costa county where's that that's kind of by san francisco okay and uh i was born there and i then i moved to modesto i know modesto it's horrible i just lived there for like uh like maybe five years i was like 11 or 12 okay you know and then i moved to santa cruz and then uh santa cruz this is where i pretty much grew up yeah everything changed you know like from i got into surfing skating and uh it just took off from there you know and then uh and then from skating i just kind of spread out like

sacramento san francisco so skating is where uh santa cruz is where you picked that up that's where you first started. That was it, man. As soon as I got to Santa Cruz, it was on. So talk to me about that because you were in the scene back when Tony Hawk was big back then. Were you back in the day? Because you're my age. So were you like the Christian Hosoi, Mark Gator? Were you in those days?

Because I remember the Vision. What was it? Search for... Animal Chant? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I used to watch those all the time. Yeah, that was the Pal Peralta. Yeah, Pal Peralta.

Yeah, Bones Brigade. Were you skating with the... That's right, Bones. Were you skating with all those guys back then? I was the generation right behind them. Behind them, okay. So I looked up to all them. You know, like I seen them in the magazines.

I was like, those dudes are rad. So you're like Bucky Lasik? Yeah, yeah. I skated like against him you know like we were amateurs together like we turned pro like about the same time so i was telling these guys that um i'm originally from baltimore and i used to play soccer yeah so this is what's funny so my cousins were in highland town and there was this great soccer store there it was called sports elite back in the city and we would all go to get our gear there

but out back in what is considered a yard in a baltimore city row home is a concrete slap slab with they built the fucking half pipe so there were only a few kids back then that we could even do that that were in the city and my cousins used to tell me all the time ryan there's this fucking kid i'm like there's no fucking kid inner city kid from highland town skating his ass off down there and man was i wrong it was bucky fucking it was he would be down there skating all over and yeah he's a baltimore guy yeah yeah dude he's like one of the best skateboarders yeah and i love him because i'm a i'm a diehard and went to his website one day and the Oriole bird dropped down.

I was like, this motherfucker right here. I love him. Yeah, he's all about where he's from. You know what I mean? Me too. He's proud of you. Look at this right here. Right there. That's right.

I'm not fucking around. Hey, and you got the Ravens, man. Oh, my God. They're headed towards the Super Bowl. I'm a 46-year-old man. I'm excited like I'm 15 for this football team right now. No, you got to have passion, man. Anything you're into. That's it. That's how I am, man. That's how i am that's it you're right i'm into dude i'm like a little kid

i'm all about it you know all right so you're skating with this generation of guys all you're in santa cruz and like what so walk me through how do you go pro what happens to you get sponsored like how does that all happen all right well. Well, I started surfing first, right? And all my friends surf and putting on a wetsuit, like putting it on and it's all tight. And then I feel like people are checking out my ass or something. You know what I mean? Like, I just felt like it was spandex. I just felt weird. And surfers are real, like, territorial.

They're, like, kind of pretty. But I don't know. It wasn't my get down. So I skated also. And then once I like got in, got a skateboard and, uh, dude, that's what I wanted to do. You know what I mean? So skating happened and, uh, I just would skate just on the street. Like I'd build a ramp. That's what I want to ask you. You were a street skater first? Well, it's like, you could step outside and you could just go, you know i mean that's what's rad you don't have to wait for like the like

surfing like a swell or you know what i mean people don't real i'm telling you it it is it's so ingrained here still skating i see people use skateboards out here in los angeles as a legit mode of transportation often i see guys on long boards carrying 12-packs down the hill with confidence in their 30s. I'm like, God damn. People skate out here. I see girls. I love when I see a woman in her 20s, 25, headphones on and fucking skating. But she's going somewhere.

She's not just – like we only skated to fuck around. I never used a skateboard to get somewhere else. Right, right. You knowated the fuck around i never skate i never used a skateboard to get somewhere else right right you know what i mean yeah i never did that i used it at the ramps or on the street in that area to learn tricks i never used it i would ride my bike right yeah yeah dude my skateboard went everywhere with me you know what i mean like i would feel naked without it you know like that thing came everywhere like i that's just mandatory that's like the first thing uh it's just like once i found skateboarding like because this is what's so fucking rad uh you could come from like a fucked up family um just whatever it is i because

i don't think it's a sport right i think it's like art like whatever. Like whatever that's coming from the inside, you let it out on that skateboard. Like if you come from a broken home, you could grab that skateboard and let it all out on that skateboard, on the curb or the ramp or whatever. You know what Seinfeld says about the skaters? You ever hear that? You know what? I think. This is why our worlds collide.

I love it. He had such a great point. He talked about the way you guys take your childhood traumas out on those. Basically, what he's saying is that those kids over there, they're working at those tricks. They work and work and work and work. Just the way we go out and work on those jokes and work on those jokes. And he's like, those kids are going to be just fine. Those kids are going to be all right because they're out there putting the work in.

Yeah, it's fucking great. Because when you do a trick like you tony hawk anybody like you have to you're not gonna land it first try you're gonna it's you have to eat shit to make it finally you know and to be that like ingrained like just i'm gonna get it the concrete is not soft do that it's painful you know so like to just to get up and do it again until you make it you know what i mean like yeah you're you're gonna make shit happen for sure you know so like i don't know like uh i would just skate outside around uh my house like up and down the street transportation

go check out the waves and then there was a skate park derby skate park and it was like this little snake run with the ball and uh it was rad man and I didn't know how to skate it I got there and there's like all these local dudes you know they're older they're like probably like I was like what 12 13 14 and these dudes were like in early 20s maybe like 19 18 and they're older than me and they were jamming around you know they were just ripping it. And then I tried to get in there, and I just got in the way. Like, dude, they ran me over. They spit on me.

Did they? Yeah, dude. It was just like, dude, this little kid, you're just in the fucking way. So I just waited until it got dark when they all fucking left, and then I just skated in the dark. I taught myself how to skate in the dark. I pushed around the ball,

and I figured out how to go down the snake run and hit the hip and then until i got it down then i showed up and then they seen that like i wasn't getting in the way so they they let me in you know but it was tough back in the day like it wasn't friendly balls to show back up yeah that's the other thing you know half of it is just showing the fuck up you could have have been scared and gone anywhere else, but they were they at least they appreciate. But that's what I'm saying. That's that culture. Yeah. Like if you're going to be if you're going to put the fucking work in and you're going to put the time in, then you can fucking be here.

Right. And if you're going to fuck off, then go fuck off somewhere else. Exactly. Yeah. We take this shit seriously. Right. And it was pretty rad. Because once I figured it out, they started being cool.

You know what I mean? But like, it's a tough love, I feel like, you know, and it just kind of makes you who I am now, you know, like them just being tough on me and like spitting on me, running me over. Just it just it taught me how to get in there and get some air. Fucking love you, man. That's a childhood hug I never got, bro. Yeah, dude got they would sock me in the face whatever dude you must really love me that's thick that had some thickness to it yeah i feel your love yeah yeah dude so like that i don't know like that i just seen these older dudes what they are doing

i was just like dude i want I want some of that right there. I want to do that, but I want to do it gnarlier. You know what I mean? So then I figured that out and just did that work at Santa Cruz Skateboards. It was a skateboard company. His name was Steve Keenan, and he was the team manager for this skateboard team. And he seen me skating derby, and I started getting all right at it or whatever, and he started giving me his old used wheels

or his old boards, which were still in good condition. And he'd hook me up all the time. Was he a pro at this point? He was a team manager, and he was a photographer for Thrasher Magazine where he had covers of magazines. He actually grew up with Lance Mountain and Neil Blinder and all these cats. Those are the guys I know, yeah. Yeah, so he had been around a long time.

So he was a team manager, flowing me stuff. And then after I figured out Derby, there was an empty swimming pool that's been around since the 70s. It was like 74-something on. It was called Buena Vista. It was out towards Watsonville. This burned down house, this house burned down, and there was a pool. And they emptied it, and people skated it all the way to, it's still there now.

And people skate it. You know, it's a trip. And so they had a contest there. And, well, when I first started skating there, my friends would take me after school, high school. I went to a continuation school, like where I got done at 12, right? And they would take me out there. And it was the same dudes that were spitting on me and the same thing. They were just like, oh, here's this little shit again. You know what I mean? Yeah. So I just waited till they split. And then I skate in the dark and then I figured it out. Right.

And then I just like, dude i i love this pool like dude i just went there every day every day for months and uh they had a contest there on fourth of july like anybody could enter all these older cats uh pro skaters could enter whatever how old are you at this point i was like 17 okay yeah like 17 and uh I entered, and I won. Like, I won the fucking contest, right? And that dude, Steve Keenan, was there. And he's like, dude, here's my number. Give me a call.

I want to give you some stuff. So I hit him up, and he's like, hey, come in to our warehouse, and you can get some skateboards. We want to hook you up on the flow team or whatever. So I went in there. He gave me a big duffel bag go get what you want dude i'm just like a kid he gave you an empty duffel bag and said go fill it yeah with skateboards t-shirts stickers wheels dude it's crazy so i filled it all up i i thank you very much he's

like you're on the flow team right like so i get home and i show it to my mom i'm all look what i got mom like this company gave me all this stuff. And she's like, where'd you steal this from? You know what I mean? Yeah, of course. No, mom. What do you mean they gave it to you? Like for skating?

You're out at night. You're coming back with new shit. Right. No, no, I'm skating. No, you're not. It's crazy, you know? So, yeah, the skateboard company gave it to me. And I could go in there once a month and pick out what I want.

So would you say at this point you're a hip pocket, or are you signed by them? No, I'm just like not even on the real team yet. I'm just like a flow guy where they just give me stuff. They're appreciating you right now. Yes, right now. So then a few months later, they hit me up, and they're like, hey, there's an amateur contest coming up. You and your friend that also got on the flow team with me Jason row rest in peace We got if they go if you want to come to this contest, it's amateur

It's all the best sponsored Northern California skaters, you know And if you make top 10 will put you on the real team where you go you get to travel you get the Get ads in the magazine, you know? And so we went, it was in, it was in Washington, I want to say. And I ended up getting eighth place. Okay. You know, you needed top 10. Yeah.

Top 10. Dude, I was so nervous after my run. I puked like I threw up cause I was just so nervous. Like people watching you, you know what I mean? And all these dudes I seen in magazines were there skating like rippers, you know, and I got eighth place, and they put me on the team. And then from there it just took off. Like they started letting me go on tours, giving me ads in magazines,

and they ended up turning me pro because I was in high school. My mom was just like, like when you graduate it's either you're working you're going to college or you're moving you're you're not living here and I was like fuck and I know I dude going to work I'll break out in a rash I do not want to work you know I mean like like fuck that you know so I'm trying to figure out whatever so they put me on this tour and they they're like after this tour we're going to turn you pro so I'm trying to figure out whatever. So they put me on this tour, and they're like, after this tour, we're going to turn you pro. So I'm like, Mom, please just let me do this skateboarding,

and it's going to work out. So let me ask you, what does pro mean in the skate world? What happens as, what do they do to make you a pro? Like, do you have a contract with them? Like, how does that work? Well, back then, like in the late 80s and early 90s you had to skate contest amateur it was called NSA National Skateboard Association and uh it was uh districts so I would skate against all the northern California skaters and if I made the

cut like top 20 then you advance to uh regionals okay and then that's when you met the down south dudes the Omar songs the Danny Ways that you Danny Ways. That you didn't even know about. Yeah, didn't even know. And then you ran into those dudes, which were gnarly. And then if you made the cut from there, you went to the finals. And then you met the back east dudes, you know, like Tom Boyle, Neil Hendricks, Mike Frazier. Like these, you know, and then you get them all together. And if you make like the top ten or whatever, you do super good in those finals,

for a couple years, they ended up turning you pro. OK. You know what I mean? Like you had to earn it back then. Now it's pretty easy to get to turn pro. You can take a couple of photos in the magazine and they turn you pro or whatever. Do a couple of crazy tricks. But back in the 80s and 90s, it was like you had to earn it.

You know, so it was crazy. So they're about they're telling you they're going to turn you pro if you run this gauntlet basically right and you're trying to convince your mom to let you do so yeah so she she goes okay all right do your thing like she just like she thought it was cool that i got to travel you know like i never got to travel so go go get that you know and it was neat though. I got to go see the United States. Because I was real close-minded. I was a little shithead.

I was very mean. I just would like to push people's buttons. I like to fuck with people. And it was usually people bigger than me. I would drink and see all these stars. That's how many times I've been knocked out so how many you're on i don't know it looks like a galaxy i can't that one that big one there's more there than the twinkle twinkle little star book i read my dog yeah that one's a big dude i landed way over there like i got knocked out let me see put it back up i i can see

six i mean you got like five little ones and one big motherfucker yeah so like i would i'd drink and then i'll just go pick the biggest dude you know because they're always the tough guys right and like i go up to him and go hey you got a little peep you know you're big but i bet you got a little you know i just do whatever i could to get under you know and i'd be like if you knock me out when i wake up i'll shake your hand if not we're fighting you know and i love black eyes anytime i got a black guy guys but no i want like i do that's the one i use all the time black guys no black eyes you love a black eye on you? Yeah, black eyes with black eyes. Dude, they were like trophies to me. Every time I got one, I just thought they were tough.

What was it about? Do you come from a split home? My mom took care of me. I met him once or whatever. So there's a lot of anger and rage and shit going on. My mom was super good. She took care of me. I'm the same way man you don't realize till later like you're like oh man i was so fucking angry yeah you know like you said you like to push people's buttons yeah dude i would fuck with people but i crazy but you want you like the punishment then

yeah i just take it you know i mean because it only makes you tougher you know what i mean like dude and if i got two i thought that was like a score you know so you were picking these fights to in order to get the beat you weren't trying to win or were you trying to win like dude whatever like i didn't mind like if i got trophy i was that that's cool no big deal to me i got a black i was all stoked like this is sick dude you know what i mean and uh and two two like i always wanted a knocked out tooth dude what i i had never nobody has ever looked me in my face and told me i've always wanted to knock down tooth not one person i've met a lot of people in my life it's not one of them cool to have a missing tooth right just a missing tooth and i i was in san jose at my

friend's house todd prince Prince, JJ Rogers, these older dudes that I looked up to and they were drinkers. We'd all drink. And I woke up in the morning and I'm like, Todd, dude, I always wanted a missing tooth. I just think it looks fucking tough. Right. I got my wish that fucking night. Right. So we went, I beat up this dude over a girl. Right. And I went back to go get him again at a punk rock show. And I went there with Todd and my friend JJ and everybody and we were drinking and I was fucking with that dude that I got in a fight with before. The bouncers didn't like what I was doing. So they, you know, they were like, dude, you're out of here, whatever. I kept fucking with them. So after the show, we go outside and my friend Todd and he's from Texas. He's a fucking big boy, and he was like 10 years older than me.

He was known for knocking people out. He bought a slice of pizza, a real hot slice of pizza. I walk out of the show, and he takes a bite, right? He's like, and I just slap it right in his face. That burn it is. I run across the street, and I'm like, aha, motherfucker, how'd that feel? He's just like, I'm going to fuck you up, Andy. And I was just like, aha, how's it feel?

Oh, you got a piece of pepperoni right there. You know what I mean? So he came across the street, and we started fighting, right? And then the bouncers, seeing what we were doing, came out, split us up, and they started fucking with me, right? Got me on the ground. So when they split us up, Todd got pushed away. And then he fucking got loose and he ran up and fucking kicked me in the mouth.

But he had steel-toed boots on. And knocked my fucking tooth out. And I got my, right? So I got my tooth knocked out. Did it break your jaw? No, but it split my lip open. Like you could fit a finger inside my lip. Come on.

It was that wide open. So I was like, that motherfucker split my lip open like you could fit a finger inside my lip come on wide open so i was like that motherfucker split my lip open i was with this girl and she's like your lip your teeth are gone and i'm like what so i go my yeah i'm like all right so i look in the mirror and i'm like and dude i got a missing tooth i got it you know what i mean but i was mad did you find the tooth no i couldn't find it yeah it's so dude i got my wish the opposite of every i've been in a lot of fights i have never one time gone in without the intention at least to the goal was to win the fight not get a black eye or not tooth i'm trying to come out unscathed. Right, right. Yeah, dude. This is the opposite of every fighter I've ever heard.

Dude, I floss with shoelaces. I was just like. You know what I mean? I was so stoked. Dude, I loved it. You know? So you kept it out for a while? Dude, for like, just till recently.

It was like 20 years. 20 years. Oh, for real? Yeah. So I fucking loved it, dude. I was so excited. It was i mean and you could go down on a girl and then you on their downstairs area you could suck their little thing and then like with your tongue like a punch mac you know i loved it like dude that was what that little little gapper was for you know you? That gapper. You know? So, dude, that was amazing.

It gave me two decades of pleasure. Yes, it did. I loved it. I loved it. Oh, man, that is too much. And so, like, dude, I could go on. So I ended up, all right, so we'll stick with the teat thing right now, right? So I had it for 20 years.

And when I went to prison, so then when I got into it. Hold on. Let's go back because you're about to go pro. Let's go back. All right. Yeah, all right. I'll keep us back online here. You're about to go pro, and then we'll get into drugs and prison.

Okay, okay, okay. All right. So I get to go pro, right? At what age are you pro? I'm getting ready to turn 19, right? At what age are you pro? I'm getting ready to turn 19. Okay. Right? So I was on a tour.

They're like, I wasn't getting along with one skater. They're just like, come back home. I was in Georgia or something. They're just like, fly back home and work on your graphics. You're going to turn pro. And what are you doing? Because back then wasn't X Games or anything like that. What are you guys like festivals or what are you doing?

Or were the X, were you just starting that? No, not yet. So, like, during the summer, we'd go on tours. So, we would. Like a Vans tour or something? No, like skate shops. Okay. So, skate shops would call the company Santa Cruz Skateboards and they would, we'd do demos.

So, they would set up ramps in the parking lot or they had a ramp in their backyard or a skate park, which was rare, though, back then. parking lot or they had a ramp in their backyard or a skate park which was rare though back then and we would come as a team and skate a curb uh ramps that they built it whatever yeah pretty much demos you know and we'd just go around the united states and do that for like a month two months sometimes 18 19 to do that it was so much fun like dude it was crazy like uh it was just rad dude i went it's it's the best thing ever because then you get because i was real close-minded right i fucking didn't like nobody i was just like from santa cruz and it was a real localism there you know i mean if you weren't from santa cruz you're a kook or whatever you know i mean that's how the surfers were not who i hung

out with once i started traveling it was like there's cool people everywhere you know what i mean like there's rad people they're different whatever hillbillies and alabama dude tennessee they're fucking crazy like but it's rad you know i mean like you it's just it's neat there's other people out there that are rad too and that are just as crazy and like to have fun too you know so traveling was great that was like the best part of it is to get in the travel and skateboard so when do you start to get in a little bit of trouble so uh and why what happened in pro like after i turned pro i was traveling a lot and i would come back from trips and i would hang out with my friends from

high school and you're living in Santa Cruz? Santa Cruz. Okay. And my friends were drinking. They would start getting wasted and they'd do blow, right? And we'd do some lines or whatever. And these guys were not skaters? They were just people I grew up with in high school.

They surfed, you know, and they skated, but not like serious. They weren't pro and taking it for real like you? Nothing. They were just hangout dudes, you know, have fun and just party or whatever. But I would come back from skateboard trips, hang out with them, drink, have fun, do some blow, whatever, and then I would take off on trips again.

And I'd come back and do the same thing. Well, I came back from one trip, and they started smoking it. They were smoking Coke, a crack or whatever. They would cook it up with baking soda and cook it or whatever, get a nickel and then stick to the nickel and smoke it or whatever. And I kept going back and forth.

And then I came back one time and there was this dude, CT, resting. He died. He started doing heroin. He brought heroin. Not pills. He had heroin. Powder. Tar heroin. died uh he started doing heroin he brought heroin because i know not pills yeah hair powder tar tar heroin because i don't even know how you how do you do tar hair they were smoking it on foil so they would get it heating it underneath yeah they would get a lighter and a straw

and then they would you know and i was just like dude i had no idea what like there's consequences of this thing, you know? Like, because you get drunk and we just party. But these dudes were taking it to a whole other level, you know? And is anyone shooting or just not yet? Not yet, you know? And there's just, like, five dudes that are all doing it, you know? And I would come back, and then I went on a trip, and I broke my foot.

And I was out for, and then I went on a trip, and I broke my foot. And I was out for like six months. So I went back to hang out with them, and I was hanging out there like every day. And after three days of smoking heroin, like you start getting, you can feel the withdrawals if you don't, you know, if you don't do it. Three days, yeah. And I was like, I had money, you know, from, you know what I mean? So I had some checks and dude, I went to my mom's to go visit her and I didn't bring them with me or whatever. Didn't think nothing of it and got to her house, you know, went, went to go to sleep

that night and I couldn't sleep. I was just like tossing and turning. I was sweating and I'm like, what the fuck is going on? I couldn't, like like it was irritating i felt like uh red ants inside my skin just like crawling all over and i'm just like can't sit still hot cold runny nose whatever i'm like it's the fucking heroin i wake up in the morning i'm like mom i gotta go i fucking drove all the way back from modesto because she moved from uh uh they after they lived in santa cruz they lost uh they had a business and they had some problems they moved back because my stepdad was from modesto area so they moved back

there so i go visit them but i'm like mom i'm going back to santa cruz and i fucking flew back and went and got some and felt better and then it fucking from that day on it was just a nightmare you know and every day you're using now? Yeah, and I'm spending my skateboard checks trying to hide it, you know? And your foot's busted, so you're not making any. There's no money coming in. It's all going out. But then I healed, you know what I mean?

And then I just kept going, but I'd bring it with me. And were you able to skate while you were on this? Dude, I loved it. Yeah, I could skate. I could do whatever. You really could, huh? I'd get energy from it. This is what it fascinates me about.

Because I remember, I think it was Andre Agassi was talking about how he did meth. Right. While he was playing. And he said that, I'm pretty sure it was Agassi. He said, if it's not, sorry, Andre. Yeah. But I don't think he ever won a championship during it. But he said he had never been more focused.

Really? Really focused. It obviously wasn't a good thing but it did help him focus right so you're at this point you're still smoking it like this smoking it and like right before you get on a board and go or yeah dude i could like right before and like it but everyone i've ever seen do i've watched people in baltimore city fall asleep walking oh how are you scared how did you get energy i do i don't know it just do like some people got like a chemical imbalance like some people do it i mean these people are just like standing up sleeping dude i lived at this sro in san francisco and i called her the

hunchback hooker she's a prostitute right and she would fucking get loaded and she would just be like yeah and keep going and so she would have like a hunchback. But I would get energy from it, you know what I mean? It would make me crazy. Like I came out of my shell, you know, and I'd just like go nuts and crazy. But, yeah, some people just get smacked back. You know, I would get like that sometimes, but like it really gave me energy, you know? So now how long are you using heroin while you're smoking before you start

shifting the way you do it or before it starts affecting performance like what happens well it's just like the more deeper you get into it like uh there's just gonna be times where you can't get it you know and then if you got dates to go travel skating or contests or take a photo or something you know and you can't get it because these heroin dealers or whatever, you're on their time. They know they got it. They know you need it. They're going to just take their fucking time, and you're going to be waiting, and they know you're going to be waiting.

You know what I mean? So it's going to sometimes happen to where you can't get it, you know? Like I started running for Antihero Skateboards. It was like my buddy I grew up with skating, Julian, and I just got on the team. We went to Florida for a contest. It's the first contest of me riding for Anti-Hero, and I bring heroin with me.

You would fly with it and everything? I would fly with it. Where do you hide it? Well, I would cheek it, like put it in between my cheek and gum, you know, my butt crack, or I would get it, like put it in between my cheek and gum, you know, my butt crack. And then, or I would get chewing gum. So not up your ass, but just tight in between. Yeah, just in there, you know, store it or whatever.

But you're not bringing the foil or just getting foil somewhere else? No, I would. What I would do, I'd get the tin foil and I'd wrap it around my toothbrush. Like it was my fucking cover for my, to not get messed up. You know what I mean? Because I didn't know if it would like set the alarm thing or whatever. I thought it would, you know?

And, and then I would wrap the heroin super good. You become very creative. You know what I mean? Crazy. Let's check this bag right here. This toothbrush cover. It's got heroin residue.

Yeah. All right. You can go. Yeah. So, and you never got pinched on that or anything no never never um and how many times would you say you have i brought to australia but this is before 9-1-1 you know i like i don't know what it's like i mean i i've done it after but i'm just but just throw out a random number here how many times would you say you've gotten heroin successfully through TSA? Every time. Probably like 20 times.

Like, if not more. And you're not freaking out inside? I mean, I did a little bit, but like... Did you smoke heroin before you went through and did it? I smoked it on the plane. You smoked heroin on a plane in a bathroom? Yeah. I would flush the... Because the toilet there is kind of like a jail toilet

where it sucks it real quick, you know. So when you take a hit, you push the thing. Hold on. Oh, yeah. Come on. Walk me through. Walk me through. Walk me through.

So I'm in there, and it stinks. So, like, you got to be creative once again. There has got to be a club for – like, they got the Mile High Club for sex. There's got to be a heroin club if you've done it on a plane. Yeah. I went to Australia once. You get up out of your fucking seat. Yeah.

On a domestic flight, you've done it? Yes. Yeah, absolutely. Domestic is like a normal flight, right? Yeah. And you just go in the bathroom. I fucking went to Australia once, and I brought it with me. And it was a 20-something hour or 19-hour flight.

I almost smoked all my shit. By the time I got off the plane, I ran out. And they didn't know? They didn't know. They didn't smell. I fucking ran out. I got sick by the time I landed. Like, I wasn't even fucking making it there yet and have fun.

Smoked all your fucking shit. Yeah. That's how long that fucking flight was, man. Like, I fucking couldn't even, like, fuck. I had one hit left, dude, fuck, I have one hit left. Dude, by the time I landed on that fucking down under. So you're in there and you cook it and then you flush and blow the flush down in there? Right.

And then suck it right through, you know what I mean? And it doesn't stink? No. Or does that go away pretty quick? No, it lingers, you know what I mean? But, like, you get get like a baby powder like i get like a little small one and squeeze it and it kind of like kill the the smell a little bit like there's little things that you could do you know what i mean like to to cover it up but uh

so i'd like it was like what would they do if you're over if you're halfway into a flight to australia they find out you're're halfway into a flight to Australia, they find out you're smoking heroin in the bathroom. Other than making the rest of that flight happen and arresting you when you get there, there's nothing they could do then. You can't stop that flight. No, no.

But as soon as you land, you're going to be going back. You're getting right on a plane for 20 more hours and going right back in custody. Yeah, but there was like, I went to Florida to that contest. We got there Wednesday. The contest started on Friday. And then, and if you made the cut, it went till Sunday. So I brought, I thought enough with me.

Well, I ended up running out on Friday. And Friday, I made the cut. I got seventh place. I ran out. On heroin. On heroin. On heroin. It was the biggest contest of the year.

I can't even believe it. Yeah, it's crazy, right? Do you ever wonder if you would have got first or third or anything if you weren't on heroin? Or do you think that regardless, heroin didn't hinder that i don't think like either way you know i mean like yeah i don't even think like it was a difference you know where you would have still got seventh yeah like it would have went either way well i ran out and i made the cut right i got seventh place so in the thing so i ran out so now i'm sick and i gotta skate on saturday that fast the withdrawal like so if i woke up in the morning and smoked it you got till the next day

okay then you're gonna start feeling it yeah you'll get through a day you know what i mean if you smoke the nut like you have to have a good little nut. You know what I mean? So I ran out, and, dude, I started getting real sick. My bones were getting sore. I remember going to sleep, and I was tossing and turning. I was sharing the bed with my buddy, Cardiel, and I kept tossing and turning. He's like, dude, what's wrong with you? I'm just like, dude, I'm nervous.

The contest's tomorrow, whatever. I would go in the bathtub, and I would soak my body because warm water, I would take I would, like, take a bath, and it would, it would help a little bit, you know what I mean, with your bones and stuff, and I remember, I didn't even think I slept, because you don't sleep at all, like, you're just toss and turn, so the next morning, I had to skate the, like, the finals, or whatever, and I was like, dude, I told my team manager, dude, just get me a beer, get me some chewing tobacco. And I was just trying to drink to like kill the fucking misery, you know. And I was just drinking a bunch.

And, dude, I had to skate through this contest fucking dope sick, you know. And I ended up getting fifth place. And I won best trick. And I won best trick. You know, trick you know it was crazy i was like put slayer in the trick dude it was uh where i it was like a ramp and then it was like a higher one and so i like ollied up onto this one going like backwards and then i aired back into the thing and it was like a real steep ramp or whatever you know but uh i just played slayer like put slayer in and i just would drink beer and fucking try to just overcome.

There's nothing I could do. I just got to fucking skate or whatever. But it was fucking miserable. And then my team manager was like, dude, if you get top five, I'll buy you a crack and a hooker. I'll hook you up, right? So I got fifth place. Dude, I'm like, fuck yes. Dude, let's go get the hooker, right?

And I was like, I'm going to get the hooker and I'm going to ask her where the shit's at. Right. And, but there wasn't none and it was all crack. So I didn't get what I wanted, but I got the hooker or whatever. But so, uh, but it was just stuff like that, dude. So you just run out and it's just like, there's just going to be those times when you can't get it. And it's just, it gets worse and worse. i'm sitting here thinking about how talented you are at skating

so i mean there really is no reason at this point for you to think i should stop this because i'm coming in fifth and seventh anyway it's not stop it's not hurting me right i mean i mean there's no incentive to stop if you're you know if you're lebron james on heroin you're dropping 35 every night why do i need to stop smoking heroin i'm look at what i'm doing yeah the only thing was like now i was young so i was like dude i got plenty of time like dude i'll clean up and then you know i mean but then next thing you know five years went by you know i mean and this it just ended up getting worse and worse. So what happens? Five years go by. Are you still smoking all five years? Are you into pills?

Are you needles? What do you, does it shift? I remember Jay Adams. I don't know if you know who Jay Adams is. Lord's of Dogtown. You know that movie, right? Didn't he just pass recently? He passed away.

A few years ago? Yeah, he had a heart attack or whatever. We lived together. He was a real close friend of mine. He moved to Santa Cruz and we became real close. And he's the first one to inject me with a needle, right? Like, I was always scared of it. I didn't know, like, dude, that's how people OD, freaking out.

AIDS, anything. Yeah, all that stuff that comes with it. And he's just like, dude, you're wasting it by smoking it. That's way better this way. And he's like, he was staying at my house, and he was like, come here, Andy. and he's just like dude you're wasting it by smoking it that's way better this way and he's like he was staying at my house and he was like come here andy and he's in the bathroom and he was doing his thing and i go in there and he's all let me see your arm i'm like boom and he just goes had it already ready right boom bam got me and uh i was just like it hit me and it was like no tie off or anything tie off or anything? You just stuck it in your arm? Yeah, like, you know, like you could do it like that.

You can. So it felt so good. You know what I mean? It was just a whole different, like when you first, when it first hits your bloodline or whatever, it's just the crazy like pins and needles in your head or whatever, you know, and it's just a whole different trip. You know what I mean? And then that's just when it's just you're it's just a whole different trip. You know what I mean?

And then that's just when it's just, you're taking a whole, to a whole nother level. You know what I mean? You're, I have no more veins. My veins are done. Really? I shot at my pecker. I shot it. You shot?

I started running out of. Stop. Yes. Don't even say another word. Yeah. You shot heroin in your dick? Yes. I had not.

Dude, I shot. This dude's forehead once. Wait, let's go back to the dick. The forehead's not that impressive. Okay, are you shooting it in like a fat vein on the side of your dick, or are you putting it down your dick hole? No, no, not the dick hole. I wish it was that easy.

I wish it was that easy. Dude, I closed my eyes and just like, oh, fuck. And then boom. Left and right over here. My spine is dead. I wish it was that easy. I closed my eyes and just like, oh, fuck. And then boom. Left and right over here. My spine is dead. So you have to find a vein. Do you do a hard dick or a soft dick? Well, you've got to squeeze it and turn it purple.

You know what I mean? You've got to soak it soft. You've got to stretch it out and squeeze it and wait until the blood. Cut the circlet so it swells up and get that vein going. And then, you know, and then bam. And you stuck a needle in your own dick. You got to go real slow, though. You got to, like, because if you miss, you get the abscess.

And then you know what an abscess is, right? No. Like, I don't know if you've seen, like, if you've been to sketchy neighborhoods where people, like. The bumps, you mean? We've been to sketchy neighborhoods where people like... The bumps, you mean? Where, like, if you've seen people that got short-nosed sleeves on their shirt and they got divots in their skin, that means where they had an abscess because each year, that's where they miss, right?

Or they just muscle it. It's called muscling it. Where they just get the... When they run out of veins, they'll just stick it in their muscle and they'll go... But if that needle's dirty or something like that, or you do it too fast, it could get infected or something, and it swells up, and it just eats your muscle.

And then it swells up, and then you pop it, right? And this yellow, like you could lose body parts from it if it gets too bad. Damn. Like I know people that died from from them you know you've rest in peace to handful of people here today already yeah seriously yeah and uh it smells it's just like oh fucking death you know what i mean it's crazy but uh and you're risking your dick yeah dude and i was just i was very good you know i was really good at how many times you shot in your dick i just done it twice okay i have so many questions all right yeah the first time you do it who does someone

there show you how to do it is or you just do no i already told you or you just figured it out my buddies like i've done it before my my dick and i was like he's done it in his pecker they're not it's so you shoot it in your dick soft butcker. So you shoot it in a, your dick's soft, but you stretch it, you shoot it in. Does it make your dick like instantly hard? It awakes. It wakes up. It wakes up for sure.

You know what I mean? Get the fuck out of here. But then is the feeling the same as in your arm or anything? Like, do you feel that same euphoria? You do. You got, it's the same feeling. You know what I mean? And it's just that you get that tingling. So why pick that?

Is it because you're running out of veins? I couldn't go nowhere else. are your veins like collapsed or what yeah because after you do it so much they just they just die they just collapse and you can't like so how does blood flow through your fucking body dude like i have to sleep on my back i cannot sleep on my side either way because my hands fall asleep and i have to stand up walk around till they come back all right so you're shooting heroin in your dick where are you where tell me exactly where you are when you do this the first time i'm in my friends it's a trailer park oh my god yeah dude that's crazy yeah and stopped in california where it's miserable like And you're in a trailer in the bedroom? A trailer in the bathroom.

In the bathroom. My buddy, RT, he died. He's dead. His kid's name was Danger. He was a convict dude, and he was a mean dude. He was very mean and a bad person. So I would run around with him, and that's where the home invasions would happen

too like i seen him yeah we got a lot getting ready to do that you know what i mean but uh it just like as the longer i was in this addiction it just you get into deeper situations where like after i stopped getting those skateboard checks, I had to start stealing. And I wasn't, you know what I mean? I didn't like to steal. Like, I remember I was with these Serenios, these gangbanger dudes that were selling it. And I became friends with them. And they're like, I was sick.

And they're like, well, you got to go steal some foil in the store. And I was like, fuck, no, I'm not stealing no foil. I just felt like once I stole it, they would see guilty like this dude's like i would just get caught you know well like you're not smoking until you get a spoil like we don't have none so i had to go in there and still like dude i just like had to learn how to steal you know i mean like shit that i never done before i always had cash before now i'm getting to that level where I'm going to have to start robbing and stealing. Are you skating at all anymore? It started not happening.

You know what I mean? I'm just hanging out with dudes that are. Shooting heroin in your dick. Yeah, exactly. And hitting people on their forehead. You know what I mean? It's a whole other world, man. It's fucking crazy.

You only did it twice. So what about the second time? And how soon it was in a port-a-potty one you've done it in the dirtiest places you could use toilet water before dude i flushed it like three times oh my god i use spit i've used the river water yeah like it's like like uh you know how it gets the mist on a leaf? Yeah. Like, I use the water that's landed on a leaf and cup a little bit of water. So why did you stop shooting in your dick? Did you start to have problems?

It didn't last very long. Like, the veins, it was just too hard. It's already collapsed. It's a dangerous area. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know, and it was just like, they collapsed there. I don't want that thing to shut down and not work no more.

You know what I mean? Yeah, I do know. It's my fucking pecker. Like, yeah, that thing collapsed there. I don't want that thing to shut down and not work no more. You know what I mean? Yeah, I do know. It's my fucking pecker. That thing's done. I'm done. It's over. It's a wrap. Absolutely.

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or meet their financial goals. Free yourself from the burden of high-interest credit card debt We'll be right back. slash honeydew to find out how low your upstart rate is. Checking your rate only takes a few minutes. That's upstart.com slash honeydew. Now let's get back to the show. Okay, so skating's starting to fade away. Now you're starting to run with gangs a little bit. And what happens? I just, I remember. And you're shooting all the time now?

All the time. Is it always needles? Yeah. You're done smoking it? Yeah, done smoking it. You never did pills? I would like to take them here and there, but it wasn't my thing. Because that's like the suburb way of going about it these days.

It's the pills, then it goes to the heroin. Right, because they can't run out of the scripts, and now I've got to go get the shit downtown. Yeah, I just thought that was like the weak way, pills. It's like, ah, whatever. But I just knew, like, well, I started hanging out with these guys that would go steal. They'd meet downtown in Santa Cruz, and they would go boosting or whatever. They would go to Ross Dress for Less and Walgreens, Walmart,

and still like portable CD players, electric toothbrushes, the Oral-B, the $100 ones. So we would meet up down at the bus station and then we go take off and we go still like go to rostress for less we go one way the other people go the other way and uh wear real baggy pants jacket and uh i would put two pairs of shoes in my waist two in the back, like four pairs of pants. And what, are you going in the dressing room with all this shit? Yeah, right in the aisle. Really? Yeah, like just where the angle.

You're not worried about cameras or anything? Well, some, you know, like they're not, they don't work sometimes. You know, there's just like, we just had certain stores down. And I put four pairs of pants under here, put my hand in my pocket, and then walk out. I mean, put it in the car or whatever, stash it in the bush and go back again, you know. And then we'd go to the taquerias,

and the paisas, the Mexicans, would buy them. They'd eat it up, and then we'd sell them to them. And then we'd get their orders, what they wanted, you know. Really? Yeah, and we'd just hit up all the taquerias and make our money, go steal every day. So it was just like, that don't last forever. You're going to end up going to jail. So I knew that was going to happen, so I asked my friends that been to jail.

I was like, dude, what's it like? I remember I asked my friend, I'm like, dude, what's it like in there? I'm like, can you draw me what it looks like? So he drew it out. Like, all right, this is a top tier, and these are where the sales are. So I knew I was going, you know. You really did? Oh, yeah.

Like, you do bad things, bad things are going to happen. Of course. That's just how it goes. And where's your mom at this point now? She was back in Modesto, back home, and I'm just running the streets, you know, staying wherever I can. Skating's done. It's just done.

They're not trying to bring you back, or they did, and it just was. They tried so many times, and I'd avoid them. I just, like, hid out. Like, I didn't, I lost weight. You know, I was just all tore up. Like, I was so embarrassed that I just didn't want to be seen. They tried to track me down, and I would just hide out, you know. Like, I was just in that world.

Like, it's a fucking dark evil place you know and i did it on the streets of santa cruz stockton modesto and there are fucking evil people that you know i mean that don't care all right so after robbing ross's and things like that what does it escalate to next those gangbanger dudes and my buddy rt i remember uh i was staying at rt's house and i was with my girlfriend we're sleeping and i heard some noise in the middle of the night and i woke up and i look up and all three of them are gearing up they're like putting all their gear on dark clothes he had a mask on they're making sure it fit and putting bullets in the gun and rifles these dudes are gearing up

to do something bad you know they took off and I remember I went back to sleep woke up in the morning they had came back and they just had probably 80 pounds of weed and a stack of cash and they just had probably 80 pounds of weed. Jesus. And a stack of cash.

And they hit a weed farm. So they had a big case in a place and just fucking hit it? Yep. Damn. And then I eventually started doing it with, you know what I mean? Like, that's what you do. You got to come up with money. What were you running?

Like kicking in doors, drug dealer, you know? Not regular people, just drug dealers? Just drug just drug dealers you know i mean like people who have money or product that you know there's product you know i mean and you you have a certain amount of people you never worried about getting shot or any fucking thing oh absolutely absolutely uh i had a friend that did a whole invasion and he picked the wrong house he had a bb gun his buddy had the gun he had a bb gun that looked like a gun and it was some they brought it was a weed house but it was some like some heavy hitter white boy dudes and they seen that it was a bb gun they snatched him up broke his trigger finger caught him and fucked him up oh they didn't kill him they didn't kill

him oh man they didn't kill him They cleaned up what they had going on, and they got them arrested. They cleaned up their deal, and he knew not to tell on, you know, because they don't do shit like that, but it could go wrong real quick. So how many of these robberies did you see?

I've done it a few times. I've done it a few times, and it, dude, my friend... I'm nervous listening. Yeah, because you go go in and you you clear out these rooms you got to go in and make sure every room's clear and uh and then you

put the people in in the living room and you throw a blanket over you zip tie them up and you know this is exactly what happened to my friends they they had a bunch of weed and they were running their mouth about it running their mouth about it running their mouth about it and i remember they came to work the next day and they were shook they were fucking yeah shook and these dudes came in they had been casing the place for a while they heard them talking about it telling everybody and their friends how much they had and um my one buddy was in the back playing playstation and they were like you need to get out here and he's like i'm playing you need to get out here and you know like I'm playing you need to get out here and he you know what the fuck was going on he's like whatever and then a dude was like a fucking rifle shows up at the

door and he's like get the fuck out here and they stripped them all naked yeah including his sister there were like four of them they did the same thing like laid him on the floor and I think they I don't know if they zip tied him but they made him all lay there while they rocked they they took everything yeah they didn't just take there. They took everything. They didn't just take the weed. They took the TVs, the PlayStations, the laptops, everything, and took their time.

Took their time with it, walked right out, and they were like, if you all get up or call anybody, we'll fucking come back and kill you. We know where you are. And they were just done. That was it for them. They were done. They were out of it after that. Yeah, that's when you talk too much.

You know what I mean? When you're in that light, when you're doing shit like that yeah there's bad people you know what i mean and anything could happen do you know and and if you're not that person that is going to take it there then you shouldn't be doing it because your situation's like that you know what i mean so what made you stop you got caught it's just like you get caught no i mean i didn't get caught doing that but like you know the i had done it once before and it was the word got around that it might have been certain crew and it was my crew you know what i mean and just like just yeah man you gotta watch your back i was gonna say probably extra paranoid now that there's a target on your back all the fucking time and they could catch me sleeping when i'm sick or something you

know what i mean it's just like it's just a fucking dark evil fucking uh world when like drug addicts dude they have no feelings they have no fucking sensitivity like dude they don't they'll stab you in the back they'll rip you off you'll lose your dope and it's in their pocket but they're gonna they're gonna help you look for you off. You'll lose your dope, and it's in their pocket, but they're going to help you look for it. You know, like, well, let's find it, but it's in their fucking pocket. You know what I mean? It's just people just take it. You can't trust no one, like no one.

You know, it could be a dude you've been robbing and stealing with for months or whatever, and if you got the opportunity and he's in that situation, he's going to get you too, you know. So what snagged you and got you into prison? I was getting petty thefts. I was just, like, stacking them up, you know, just getting caught, stealing, yeah. And commercial burglary, you know what I mean? Just, like, over a certain amount of.

What's commercial burglary? Just, like, over, like, just over, like, 500 bucks or whatever, you know, and then they take it as a commercial burglary or whatever. And I would just I was stacking up petty thefts or whatever. And Modesto like Santa Cruz, I had like I paid that with the priors of six, six, six. I would get like five or six of them in Santa Cruz. I got two in Modesto and i got 16 months in prison they're just like you're fucking gone you know what i mean and uh so tell me to first just walk us through prison like that your buddy drew it out for you you knew you were that was

county jail so i started roll back it up a little bit so okay i started going to so i went to jail. I got caught stealing. I can't remember what I stole. It might have been, I think it was CD players, like portable and toothbrushes or whatever, electric ones. But I went to jail, and I go in this jail, and I went to this tank that all my buddies were at, right? You're going to go to D unit or whatever. That's where you want to go. And so I went there.

It's all whites and serenos, you know, gangbanger dudes. And they sent me off to the honor farm. When you first start going to jail, you get to go to, like, Camp Snoopy. It's, like, a real nice place. And they have, like, a mild lap lap track they got a softball field they got volleyball they got pool table ping pong lattes yeah contact visits they feed you real good you can fuck while you're there dude like you could yeah people were hopping the fence at night and meeting the girl in the park you know like, like they had the dogs from the cameras.

But it was real laid back. You could, yeah, you could get yours, you know, or get little quick hand jobs in the visiting, you know, if you're sneaky enough. And where is that? That was in Watsonville, like the outskirts of Santa Cruz County. Yeah, Santa Cruz County. But it was like more towards Salinas going south or whatever. But you were also on heroin. So I imagine you're cold Turkey.

I had to kick and it was miserable, man. It was fucking miserable. How many days is your first jail? I, I got, uh, I think I got three months.

I got three months. Yeah. In jail. And you're cold Turkey on it. Yep. And you got to kick it in there. It's miserable. They don't help you anything.

They're right. They give you like some little, like some anti-anxiety stuff that nothing that works you know what i mean there's no methadone or no no i i heard they do that now or whatever but dude i'm just kicking dude and you can just see people coming in and dude i had i remember uh dude i i was on methadone and heroin right and j Jesus Christ. You know, like, this is the garbage disposal, pretty much. Yeah, I hear you.

I got caught stealing and I got arrested, dude. And, dude, the methadone's worse than heroin. Like, dude, that shit. That's what people say. I've heard that. It gets into your bones

and it's, you just want to die. Like, dude, I didn't sleep for 45 days. 45? 45 fucking days. Did you start tripping? Dude, yeah.

Like, you, 45 days? Like, you would, you would close your eyes for like a couple minutes you know what I mean but not no sleep you know what I mean you just fucking are so miserable and you're in a harsh environment where like anything could go jump off you were awake for 45 straight days in jail

45 days I am not exaggerating. And all the withdrawals on top of that as well. Because I was kicking both of them. And that methadone, it gets into your bones and stuff. And, dude, it's fucking, you just want to die. Like, dude, it was insane. But, like, so I would go to these honor farms, you know.

And then there's a lot of fun activities you could do there, you know? I started making Fifi's, pocket pussies. What? Right? And I would sell them to the Pisces. So how do you make one? I once heard Scott Weiland before he passed. I'm going to have to ask you.

Yeah, will you? Can you have me on again and I'll bring you a present? Pocket pussies for everybody, God damn it. Yeah, I'll make them for all you guys. Pocket pussies for all the guys. Blue band everybody. You guys will never use your hands again. Pocket pussies for everybody, guys.

You'll never use your hands again. You can make a virgin, a butthole, a bar slut, whatever you want. Dude, this is amazing. You got models. I love it. Dude, you can glue it to your gooseneck of your bike and fucking, if you want. Yeah. You know, like going uphill. Have you done that? Get up and ride it. You can glue it to your gooseneck of your bike and fucking if you want. Yeah.

You know, like going uphill. Have you done that? Get off and ride it. And then when you're going downhill, you can just make love to it. Coasting. Love to. Yeah. Fuck it on the way up the hill. Make love to it on the way down.

Yeah. I want to make these and rent them. Rent them. You know what I mean? I don't want to rent a fucking pocketbook. You can hump while you're riding a bike lease it yeah who wants a pot i won't put my dick in the dirty pocket it's a recyclable you you clean them out so i make them no bro you gotta make one they gotta be one-offs yeah yeah don't be bringing don't be bringing those used ones

they're all they're all freshmen i promise you. They're good. Wait. I remember hearing Scott Weiland talk about how they did it in prison, too. They would take a rubber glove inside a sock, turn it inside out. You could do it that way. What are yours? You could use a towel. What do you call it? I would use a Fifi. A Fifi.

Yes. I would get a towel or a t-shirt. You just fold it to about so much into a square, and you get the rubber, the glove, and you stick the end part out, just a few inches, like a half inch out. That's the pussy. You know what I mean?

That's the birth canal. Roll it up, and then you pull that thing over, so if it was inside that, and that thing's hanging out, you over got it and stick your wiggler right in there and just go to town you know what i mean but you use like a rubber band or a shoelace or whatever you know i mean what do you use for the bar slot who was like a twist you can make it tight you can make it a little looser like whatever you want you like

you'd be like buttholes you could do a little fucking real puckered starfish. You know what I mean? A real fucking clamper in there. Let me tell you something. I got to be honest with you. This prison shit sounds pretty all right. Dude, I had a blast. Let me tell you, dude.

Like, I fucking had fun. Dude, I would go in the showers at this honor farm. And, dude, they had, if you didn't have your own soap, they had this powdered soap. And, you know, like drop the soap. Well, I would go in there and there was like five heads, shower heads. And I would go in there and I was so much fun. I'd push them all. And I would tuck my shit between my legs.

And I would like a merry-go-round. I would run around. Because there's Andy and there's Andrea. I'd always do that. I'd tuck my stuff. And I'd be like, comego-round. I'd run around. Because there's Andy and there's Andrea. I'd always do that. I'd tuck my stuff. And I'd be like, come on, guys, come on. And I'd grab a big old thing of the powdered soap and throw it on the ground. Can you guys pick that up?

Because, you know, powdered soap, you're going to be down there for a while picking it up. And no one would take showers with me. Like, the biggest dude that was in jail, he was a monster. Which is, by the way, which is everyone's fear is getting ass raped in prison yeah and you're in there willing yeah the seven footers going to the shower and i'm like oh you're taking a shower i'm like i'm gonna go get my towel and he's like oh fuck dude i'm not going in there andy's taking a shower like i'm like god damn it you know you wouldn't take a shower with me. Because it's called sex playing. We would fuck with each other, you know?

So, this honor farm was amazing, right? Like, they had a birdhouse. Right? Like a koi, what is it? I don't have any of this. I know, it was beautiful. Like, it was like, and this was. And the state's paying for this? Or we're paying for this?

Yeah, yeah. We're paying for this. We got a koi pond I can't even visit. A pussy I can't fuck. God damn, a fee fee. Somebody else is fucking my fee fee right now. So me and my buddies got an idea. This bird land's got like peacocks.

They got ducks, all this stuff. Well, there was a greenhouse, and we wanted to go have a jack-off contest right and uh all you get magazines in there you could have and you get you get naked magazines you just can't get the penetration magazines but we would play boy but not hustler yeah but i mean we get all of them you know but uh so we're gonna have a jack-off jack-off contest whoever could jack off the quickest so one guy goes in the greenhouse does their deed one guy won one thousand you know the other guy keeps point right so we go into the greenhouse and

there's a guy that works in the greenhouse so each person individually goes in and jerks off in the greenhouse right so we go in there and then it's not an old-fashioned circle jerk no no you go one at a time and it's you could see could see, like, when the sun hit, you could see, right? Sounds beautiful. My buddy goes in there, and he's fucking getting it, dude. He's, like, getting it, and he fucking knocks one out in, like, 30 seconds. Come on, man. Dude, I'm like, dude, that's fucking. That's shit you do when you're, like, 13 and 14.

Yeah, well, you got to pass time, and you got to make, you got to, yeah. I guess so, I guess so. Well, dude, you'll come up with whatever you can when you're just trying to pass that. You know what I mean? So my other buddy goes in there, and he's in there for a minute. Like, dude, he's taking some time, right? And he's like, fuck. He comes out, and he's like, fuck, man.

I can't. I can't fucking do it. I can't do it. Right? Well, he's got blue balls. That's his luck. He lost, right? I go in there, and I get, like, I think I got 40, 50 seconds.

My buddy won, right? So we go for it. I mean, you still go pro, right? Top five. Yeah, yeah, right? Yeah, yeah, right? So we fucking, we go, and I'm sorry, no. We keep doing this.

Well, the guy that's watching the Birdland area finds out we're jacking off in the greenhouse. And he's like, fuck no. Like, you guys aren't fucking jacking off in the greenhouse. So I go. And where's everybody finishing, by the way? Just on the floor? They shoot it right on the ground. It's like rocks.

You know what I mean? That's why he got mad. He's like, you guys aren't jacking off in here no more, like no more yeah i'm like dude yes we are so i got the fucking he locked it one of the last 10 so i know the lock we got locks to our locker right so i went and got the serial number off the back and i went up to the module and i asked the guard like hey uh um i uh lost the lock of my combo. Can I get it? And I gave him the serial number, which was the one to that. And so I got the combo and we snuck back in there. Well, he fucking went and told on us.

And when we were jacking off, I came after I was jacking off, right? I come out and I hear all this clapping. Everyone's all and I'm like, what? And they're all, hey all a dummy you fucking look at the sun like when the sun was fucking hitting the greenhouse you could see my silhouette of this fucking getting it right and the yard was right there so everyone could see it you know what i mean you fucking dummy we could see you fucking like a big shadow of you guys fucking tugging on it you know i was like well fuck why didn't you guys say something motherfuckers yeah dude fucking it was fucked up so they caught wind we got told on and so now the sergeant's a lady and she's going around asking everybody who's jacking off in fucking greenhouse like who in

birdland who's been jacking off you know and we stopped doing that of course. And it was rad. And there was a koi pond, right? Koi fish. And I didn't want to bother my family for money on my books. So I would do different stuff to make money. Like what? So the Paisa, the Mexicans were all, dude, I'll give you $10 if you stick your fucking wiggler in the fucking koi fish pond and make it nibble on your pecker. And I'm like, you fucking betcha, buddy. And I fucking unzipped my shit, and I stuck my wiggler right in there.

And that koi fish goes, and it sucked right on it. It just clamped onto my fucking head. Did it hurt? It just tickled. It was like a little tickler, dude. And it sucked onto it, and it tried to take my little person. I stretched it a little tickler, dude. And it sucked onto it and it tried to take my... The only person I know in my life. It stretched it a little bit and I fucking jumped back up.

You never got a fucking dick sucked by a fish. And I got ten bucks, dude, and got a kiss by a koi fish. You know what I mean? Oh, my God. It was fucking... So I do fun shit like that. It was fucking... That was ten bucks, dude.

Oh, Jesus Christ. That's a pack of smokes or soups or something. Yeah, that's a lot in prison. Yeah. Wait, you're still at the fun farm. Yeah. All right, so when does the fun end and shift to prison? Yeah, so that ends as you start getting more charges.

Because you're getting out each time, right? Right. What's an average stay at the fun farm? Three months, you say? I've done a year there. You can do up to a year. Anything after a year, you go to prison. So my charges started stacking up.

When you say stacking up, they're still coming in? Yeah, I'm getting felonies still. While you're in? I would do that too. I remember we did speed in jail, and I was up for three days. Like, my buddy was getting speed shot on a postcard, like a happy birthday card.

But it's soak it, you know? Like, they would put it in need. And then dry it out? No, and you just put it on your tongue. Like, you rip a piece of it off, put it on your tongue. And so he would get this card. It would be, speed would be already in it. Soaked on it, but you can't tell.

You know what I mean? Yeah. So then Melty, you know. You guys would sit there and just eat the card. And fucking being up for days. And it was fucking nuts. I wish prison minds would put their minds to the fucking positive shit because it this world will be unstoppable right it'll be unstoppable i'm telling you yeah all right so

your felon your felonies are stacking up and now how old are you when you when they finally say you're going to prison i was in my mid-30s yeah really yeah and how old are you now i'm 48 so not that long ago. Yeah. I've been out of trouble. It's been 10 years since I've been in trouble. Are you on forever probation? No, I'm done. I don't got nothing.

I should be. I'm clean slate. You know, like I have nothing. Yeah, it's been 10 years. All right. So mid-30s, what is the final straw that you're in court and they tell you? I got 16 months was my last time and uh or my first time uh for uh a pay theft with the prior in modesto that was my first time right you stole it put you in prison um what was i just feeling i gotta know

it might have been it was makeup what kind of makeup? What the fuck are you thinking? You get orders from people, you know, and some of that stuff's expensive. A request, like a lit, you know? What are you, like, hitting up Sephora and just robbing them? Yeah, yeah, and you get the expensive stuff, you know? And you got caught? I got caught. Where? Out in the, they have like the, what is it called?

How'd they catch you? What's it called? How'd they catch you? What's it called? The little fake cops. Mall security? No, they're. Rent-a-cop. They're kind of, not Homeland Security. I forgot the name, but there's a name where they pretend they're shopping and they're not.

Oh, undercover. Yeah, they're like undercover, whatever. They seen what I was doing and went outside, and I took off booking it. And I was in Modesto, and I was wearing a blue flannel. Well, a bunch of Nortanios seen I was wearing blue. They wrapped me up and caught me until the cops came. So whatever, I went to jail. Because that's not their color?

Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, usually they go, like, they don't care, you know, whatever. But so I got 16 months, dude, and I remember going, and I was getting ready to jump on the Grey Goose, the bus, to go to prison. And I didn't know what to expect. Yeah, I mean, well, you're in, okay, so hold on. So you go to court.

Yeah. And then the judge says. Well, they're like, you could do drug court, you know, or you could do 16 months in prison. Which drug court? Where you go for a year and a half to this gnarly drug court for you know or you could do 16 months in prison which drug court where you go for a year and a half to this gnarly drug court like every day you gotta go to meetings all this shit they were gonna so i said i want prison like i could have got out prison yeah i could have got out that day the guy that got out that day yeah so you know i was just like no

because i i knew what your teeth knocked out. You want black eyes. And you picked prison. I'm going to go get tattoos and stuff. I want to go get free tattoos. Yeah, I wanted to ask you, which one of these or how many of these are prison tattoos? They all are. I made all the same myself. I made all the same.

Wow. This is all homemade ink. Who's the baby here? I made it all. Oh, that's like a baby cherub. And who's this? My kid. Wow.

I mean, that looks great. It's hair grease. I don't know what your kid looks like, but it looks like a baby. Hair grease. You know what I mean? Like, it's stuck pretty good. All single needle from like a CD, you know? Good God. Yeah.

All right. So you could have gone home that day. You said, I'll take prison. They take you right from there, don't they? No, no. You wait like up to a a week but you're in a holding cell no i'm in a jail cell okay you know i mean and uh so i'm not letting you go home before no no you get to go and uh i remember when they called me downstairs and put me in the they called the bullpen it's like a little cell where you're with other guys that are going to prison.

And there's a white boy in there, and he's just like, oh, you're going. You're heading. So none of these tats are on you at this point. I got some. You know what I mean? I had my head tattooed, and I had some. Just black flag. Yeah, yeah. That's prison?

Yeah, I got this in prison. How long did the. I mean, that's all black. Like, how long did that take? It's a cover-up. I had a girl's name under there. I had to get it covered. there. There you go. Good one, good one. Good choice, good choice.

Yeah. So this dude's like, just was running down like how it goes. You know what I mean? Like, if you get in a riot, you want to be in the middle, let the people stand in the front line. You know, he's just running everything down to me. And I remember when we got, you go to reception. It was Tracy DVI.

It was a reception where you stay there for 30 days and you see a parole board and then they tell you where to go. And so I'm sealed up with him. He's telling me, well, on the way there, we catch wind that it's on site with Pecker Woods and the Nortenos over a tobacco debt that white boys didn't pay. And it was on site. On site means as soon as the Norteno. I knew Pecker Woods were white boys immediately.

So it's over a tobacco debt? Yeah. And that's like a big deal then. They didn't pay it. They didn't pay it. So now it's gonna be a riot. Just got a whole like you're and this is how many days are you in prison when i i wasn't even there yet i like i can find out that it's going on yeah that's what i'm going into like dude's on site you mean a white boy another white boy's coming in yeah so and what

they were doing was so you're there it was it was locked down. You're locked down though, right? Cause the, they knew what was going on that the guard and stuff. And, uh, so they take you out five at a time to go to the shower. Right. And, uh, it's mandatory. You wear your shoes on the, to the shower. Cause, uh, if anything pops off, you got your shoes on, you're not in your shower shoes and caught off guard, you know, like you gotta be ready.

You're not in your fucking shower shoes and caught off guard, you know, like you got to be ready. But what was going on, they were getting the the the the toothpaste lids and they're wedging it in the the door. Right. So when the woods walk by, they could pop the door open and get you while you're fucking walking by. You know what I mean? So this was going back and forth, and this is what I walk into. I'm just like, this is, and just seeing this, like the gates. Where's the car, Paul? Yeah.

Where's the car? I want to stick my dick in a fish's mouth. I want to go back to the fucking Camp Snoopy. Fuck, man. Jesus Christ. Now you're on a whole other level, dude, where you're showering with fucking grown-ass men. You tucking your dick and running around in that shower? I started doing that, though.

Later on, I did. The Mexicans got mad. They didn't like that shit at all. Like, yeah. Now you're with grown-ass fucking men that don't fuck around. You know what I mean? But I was still testing the water, you know? Like, all right, well, you can't do it right there, you know?

Because white boys are just like, we just do whatever the fuck we want. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, we got stuff we got to go by. But we just have a little bit looser. We have more fun with it like they're real strict we're not you know like they got a whole different program or whatever other clicks or whatever but uh dude it's just like yeah you don't know like just seeing like these big tears it's like four tears dude like doing like every like uh in the morning and at

night like every click, like, was saying, like, good night to all my woods out there, and they say their deal or whatever. And, like, yeah, it's just like you're with grown-ass men now. Like, who was the baddest motherfucker in there? Dude, one of my cellmates was Mayhem. Mayhem was his name? He was the mean motherfucker.

White dude? Yeah, white boy, yeah. And he was his name. He was a mean motherfucker. White dude. Yeah, white boy. And he was one of the people you just don't fuck with. Yeah, he's just a fucking monster. You know what I mean? He had mitts, man. Just huge fuck. Yeah.

And you know what? You can't underestimate anybody. There's some yards where there's noands policy where it's only stabbing. What do you mean? Where you don't fight with your fist. You fight with the shank. The prison rule among the inmates, the rule is it's shank only? Yeah.

And the guards let you do that? No, they don't let you, but that's what goes down with the convicts. You know what I mean? Like, it's just you don't pay a debt. You could fucking over a 24-cent Top Ramen. you don't pay a debt you could fucking over a 24 cent top ramen you don't pay it and fucking get stabbed for that you know i mean your words all you got i watch this prison shit all the time and one of the things i didn't know that scared even more scared the fuck because i like i said i'm not built for prison if they said i was going

away i'd pass out yeah yeah but um there was a guy who, they said, never borrow money, don't do any favors. And this guy went into, like, where, what is it called? The commissary where you can buy food? Yeah, where you can go to the store, yeah. And I guess he asked the dude, like, hey, can you spot me and I'll give you the money back? And the guy was like, okay. And then some other badass dude came and bought his debt. Said, I'm going to pay that debt.

And now this motherfucker is his right it was him yeah and that's why they said don't ever do that because something that guy's gonna be like yeah no problem take the yeah you're a fucking problem now yeah and i was like fuck that shit now you owe them and they could tell you to go do whatever the fuck you need to do yeah and if they're not with the click or whatever you know what i mean because you have any fights were you ever in any kind of trouble? Yeah, I've gotten into fights, dude. In prison.

I've been stabbed in the ass. You've been stabbed in prison? Yeah, yeah. How'd they get you? He had a shank. You know what I mean? Were they trying to kill you? Yeah, that's what they try and do. You know what I mean?

See, there's them. After somebody tried to kill you? Yeah. But I mean, like a single hit on you? No, just between like everybody's going yeah it's just like it happens but uh it's just like how do you go to bed that's why you go like you sleep with your shoes on like you know like there's this like some like you don't eat or drink after another race right it's not like it's not racist it's just like what race

is that you know i mean it's just like you don do that. What do you mean you don't eat or drink after a... Like you don't eat or drink after a black. You know what I mean? Like, you know, there's woods and skinheads. There's serranos, norteños. So if a black guy or a Mexican guy... Like a white boy. Like we couldn't... You don't share a cup, you mean?

What do you mean drink after? Like if you're black and I'm a Beckerwood and you want a drink? Oh, okay. I don't anyone drink. Oh, thank you. You know what I mean? Or they'll kill you for that. That's like a rule. No, you don't get killed.

It's just like a, you get told like, Hey, if you didn't know, like a fuck, I didn't know or whatever. Your first time there, like,

all right, check it out. You're going to do 123 burpees, like some pushups, right? You get disciplined the first time, you know, and the second time you do it again, then you're going to get taken in the first time you know and the second time if you do

it again then you're gonna get taken in the shower for 23 seconds and get uh chest shots you know like just no face shots because if you get black eye then they knew you're fighting you get taken off the yard and put in the hole you know i mean so you only get like body shots for 23 seconds that stands for this is what they do what you know i mean but so and then as you keep fucking up then you get beat up, and then worse, and you get stabbed. You know what I mean?

The more you fuck up, the worse it gets. I remember watching another one, too, where there was literally, it was all bunks, and they were like, this is the line. This is an imaginary line.

This is where the Latinos stay. This is where the white people stay. You don't fucking cross that line. There was a new dude that kept coming in, and he would go on the other side of the bunk bed. And they were like, no, that's our fucking. Yeah, that's our area. And the Latin dudes will go over to the white boys like, listen, we're telling your boy, don't let it fucking happen again.

And this dude kept fucking up so much that the white boys finally said, listen, we don't have your back. If you're going to keep doing that shit, we're going to let them do whatever the fuck they want to do to you because you're not gonna hang us up with that and that's what i'm saying all these little rules i'd be so scared of every rule in there i wouldn't know what the fuck they are well when you go in there so you go in there the first time when i went in there i i go to uh the gym it's a gym right where it's just a huge gym with triple bunks, right, and as I'm waiting to get my, my gear for the bed and everything, white boys come up to you, like, hey, what county you're from, because you're, it's, it's done by cars, like counties, you know, I'm from Santa Cruz

County, that's a car, right, Santa Cruz, there ain't that many dudes, you know what I mean, like Stockton, there's a whole bunch of them, Modesto, there's a whole bunch, you know, I mean, but So there's one dude for each car, you know that runs the county that you're from but all together The woods are together, you know, like if the race thing, you know, so I'm from Santa Cruz County Then they think that you get to your bunk whatever and dudes from Santa Cruz County. Then you get to your bunk, whatever, and dude's from Santa Cruz too. He comes up and he gives you soups, balls, whatever, if you don't have none or whatever. And then he runs everything down to you. This is what goes down here.

This is the telephone. That's for the woods. This gives you everything that you can do and what you can't do. You know what I mean? So you are told what you can and can can't do you know what i mean so you're you are told what you can and can't do you know i mean you fuck that up then there's consequences you know and disrespect you know uh if you're eating at the child table you don't reach over someone's plate of food you know what i mean right right you bump into someone excuse me you know like uh you don't cough and not cover you know it's just like uh when you shit like with your celly

you know because you have to shit with your fucking celly there like as soon as that turd hits the water courtesy flush you know what i mean it's like there's this common sense stuff like you're blowing out heroin on an airplane yeah right exactly yeah i know i'm learning the rules i'm learning you can talk through yeah yeah i'm gonna help you out just so just in case if you go you could hit me i'll go with you i'll get in trouble just so i can help you out i appreciate it yeah so how long are you in prison uh 16 months that's your longest did you go back i would do like a couple i've done violations but once you hit prison is it always prison after that you you go back? I would do like a couple, I've done violations. But once you hit prison, is it always prison after that? You never go back to jail, right?

Well, you go to jail first and then they ship you to prison. Every time. If you catch a new case, like a new term, you know what I mean? It depends. Nowadays, you have to do something violent. The jails and prisons are so crowded that if you're violent, then you go to prison. But if it's drugs or stuff like that, you're just sitting. And you'd rather be in prison than jail.

Really? Yeah, definitely. Why? Because there's more action. There's more. They feed you better. I'm looking for less. Okay.

They feed you better. It's more wide open. You know what I mean? Like, it's the grown-ass men. Like, you know, jail's got, like, the winos, drunks, like kids. Would you say there's more of a structure in prison? Yeah, absolutely. And it's just a free- men like you know jail's got like the would you say there's more of a structure in prison yeah absolutely free for all in jail yeah it makes sense it's messy in jail you know i mean so just the hodgepodge of everybody in these cells waiting

to go somewhere else in prison as a full structure yep like i uh i caught a violation when i was on parole when i got out and uh i was in santa cruz i wasn I wasn't supposed to get a pass and I didn't get a pass and I got arrested and they have a contract with Santa Rita, like for violators. If you get violated, you go to Santa Rita. And I was like, oh man, it's all blacks there. And all my buddies would always tell me, you don't want to go there. Like you don't, it's not a nice place. And that's where I get to go. I'm like, fuck. Right. So I'm like, Oh my God. All right. I'm going to go see parole board. Then hopefully they'll sit me off the San Quentin. I'll get to go to San Quentin cause I'll have homeboys there. Right. So I fucking, uh, I get to the parole board

and they go, or they look at my case. I caught drinking it was a 5b where you're not supposed to drink i was drunk i was on drugs and i uh didn't have a pass so i got four months for that so i'm like all right but i'm going to santa rita it's like one percent whites in there so you got nothing coming like nothing and uh like fuck all right hopefully when i go to the prison board dude i give me my time and i go to san quentin it'll be stoked and uh san quentin's a good good yeah is it yeah absolutely then santa rita santa rita it's a jail but it's it holds 5 000 inmates so it's as big as a prison right and there's one percent white so it's not very nice it's not a nice place. It's just as bad as a prison. So I go to the parole board and it's yard time and I look and it's just

like, where's the white boys at? There's no white dudes out there at all. Holy shit. Like, this is the real deal. You know what I mean? Like, you don't get that. There's not a white phone. There's not like, dude, you have to go through them to get to a phone. Usually there's a

Woods phone. You know what I mean? Not this place, dude. It's their jail. The blacks run it. That's their deal. Oakland, San Leandro, whatever, Hayward, like all those counties, whatever. But so I go to a parole board, and I get four months. And I'm like, yes, I get to go to San Quentin.

And they're like, anything under four months or less, you stay right here. And I was like So I I ended up problems there did you well you just got nothing coming and they Found out I skated right and so I had my mom like print out copies of magazines and Because they didn't believe me they don't believe it because you could, you know, in jail, you could be whatever. Anybody you want.

Yeah. So I showed them because their kid skated or whatever. So I give it to them. Can you sign that for my kid? You know, and then they started liking me. You know what I mean? So I got like a little pass. You know what I mean?

You work it, you know. Whenever you can. Yeah. So it's just shit like that, man. So when did you finally clean up and say, fuck it, I'm not going back? What happened? The last time was that violation I got. I was just done.

I was just over it, man. I'm tired of it. It's old. You know what I mean? I just get told when to shit, eat. You know what I mean? There's no freedom, yeah. The store, Bob Barker owns, you know Price is Right, dude?

He owns the store. What do you mean? Him and no freedom, yeah. The store, Bob Barker owns, you know, Price is Right, dude? He owns the store. What do you mean? Him and his wife own the commissary company. So all the shoes, everything says Bob Barker. Bob Barker? Nuh-uh. Bob Barker's the prison shoes? Yeah.

Come on, dude. Yeah. That's real. He makes a killing. That's $4.26. Anybody out there know that? Yeah. Come on down. There's so much on the honeydew, yo.

Come on. You're the next convict. Come on down. The price is much on the honeydew, y'all. Come on. The price is right. You know what I mean? You're telling me that you're wearing Bob Barker shoes in prison? I tried to take them with me, but they wouldn't let me. Yeah, no. The Barkers stay here, bro. The Barkers stay here, man.

They look like fake numbers. Get the fee feedback, dude. This pussy's not going anywhere either. Somebody can use that. Holy shit, man. You have a hell of a fucking life story, dude. It's just fucking crazy. And you're clean and sober now?

Yeah, I am. You are? I just had a year, January 8th. Oh, congratulations. Yeah. The only time I've ever been clean and sober this long was when I was locked up. You know what I mean? So I'm on the streets, and it's awesome.

Good for you, man. Yeah. Thank you so much for coming on here, this has been a fantastic fucking story. Yeah, yeah. I did want to ask you though,

because going back to your heroin days, like you talk about doing anything, Steven had mentioned, you sold some of your pro skateboards for drugs, and things like that too? Yeah, like I, I would give all my boards,

my pro models, all my boards, my pro models to my mom. And when I was hurting, I fucking took them from her and would sell them. Sign them and sell them and stuff? Yeah, whatever I could do, you know. So now I'm trying to get them back on like eBay or whatever and get them back for her. You see them out there on eBay?

I do sometimes, you know what I mean? So I try and get them back for her. I feel bad, you know what I mean? So it sucks. So being sober is great like things are so much better i'm taking um classes to uh be an interventionist like uh to help you you know try and get you know like that don't want to go like talk them in or you know like yeah just trying to give back you know like help people out that's fucking great man because i just don't want no one to go through what i've been through you know i mean it's miserable i don't wish drugs like heroin addiction on my worst enemy you know i mean it's just not cool man and if i could help out a kid not go down the road i went down would that that would

be the best feeling ever you know what i mean like it's fucking crazy how people are dying out there you know that fentanyl stuff or whatever oh man like they're dying like i know i'm from baltimore i have my families i have cousins who've been hooked on bullshit and and that fentanyl my buddy owns a a business in baltimore's telling me that this shit's coming in so strong now from overseas that the the dea guys are touching it and getting fucked up right like that's from overseas that the DEA guys are touching it and getting fucked up. Right. Like, that's heroin's, like, fucking smarties compared to the shit they're doing now.

Yeah. All right, so I want to ask you, because I ask everybody this now, I want to know if you could go back to your 16-year-old self and give yourself some advice, what would you tell 16-year-old Andy Roy? I would be yourself, dude. Be yourself. Life goes by pretty fast, dude. Take advantage. Live life to the fucking fullest, dude.

Get yours. Don't follow no one else's bullshit. It don't matter what anyone says. Chase what you want to do. Because you can do whatever you want in life, man. Get yours. You know what I mean? Because if you want something bad enough, you can get it.

But because that's what I did. I just wanted to hang out with friends. I've seen these tough guys and them be bullying or whatever. Like, I'll hang out with them because people are scared. You know, whatever. Like, that shit ain't cool. You know what I mean? Like go fucking do positive shit and, uh, see the world travel, like just make shit happen. You know? Cause like I said, if you, if there's something you want, dude, you could get it, you know, like you just gotta put your

mind to it. And, and there's the world's so big, there's so much out there to do. And the world's so big. There's so much out there to do. I missed a lot of traveling and meeting people and, like, just seeing the outside world, man. Like, I don't want to sit in one place and rot. And that's what I did for so many years. I want to see everything. And I would just be like, be yourself, man. And stay away from the fucking drugs man you know like i mean look

if you can figure out how to smoke heroin on a 19 hour flight you can figure out how to do anything dude i had eight teeth left right check this out i had eight teeth left i pulled four out i pulled four out with fucking pliers right come on four my buddy's neck face shot with i closed my eyes and he'd get a bb gun and try and shoot shoot it out and i go come on and he fucking miss and hit me in the neck but he pulled two out with pliers and then i pulled two out with pliers were they halfway coming out um you have videos of it yeah i've snuck it in a spitfire wheel like i got my own professional wheel and so i i uh i told him like dude give me my own wheel and i'll pull out a tooth with pliers and we'll stash it in one of the wheels and you could

sell it and someone that buys my wheels somewhere out there today is a tooth in a wheel dude my girl sold i pulled the tooth out and she goes dude we can sell it on ebay and i go there's no one's gonna buy my rotten tooth someone bought it for 350 bucks i swear to god so anyway i yeah then it was like a little nut wasn't barely up to right so i i pulled out i got 12 teeth pulled out in prison at once so i got right and then i had only eight left or something by and then I went down to seven so I pulled them out and one morning I got in a fight with my girlfriend and she she hid my retainers right and uh so I wanted to go skate and I couldn't find him so I just left without my I just had eight teeth you know I mean eight teeth and I go to the skate park and I get into it with this dude and he wants to fight I'm

like all right come on let's go and I go it gets my face and I get into it with this dude and he wants to fight. I'm like, all right, come on, let's go. And I go, he gets my face and I go, all right, I'm going to give you the first shot. You get the first one, right? But after that, I'm biting a chunk of your face. With these eight teeth. Yeah. And he's like, huh? I'm like, I'm just going to bite.

That was my thing. I don't want to fight no more. I just want to bite fucking the trunk off someone's fucking face. You know what I mean? I bit a finger, a dude's fingertip off before. But anyway, so I hit this guy. But anyways. So he's like, all right.

So I go, give it your all. And I had a separated shoulder. I couldn't really fight. So I'm going to just bite a Hannibal Lecter. You know what I mean? So he swings. I duck, of course. And we wrap him up.

And we dip. Like, I dip him. And we're stuck. And we're stuck upside down. And I'm trying to get to him. We're like, his face is here. My face is there. And I finally get to his face.

And I just bite into his cheek, right? And I'm starting to get that fucking chunk. And my fucking one tooth pops out. And it lands in my mouth, right? And I'm starting to get that fucking chunk. And my fucking one tooth pops out and it lands in my mouth, right? And we're face to face. And I spit the tooth out and it hit him in the face. And it bounced back and hit me back in the face. And tinkled down.

And I was like, fuck. And then he jumps up going, he just bit me in the face. I had a ring of blood around my face. He bit my face. I told you, motherfucker, I my face. He bit my face. I told you, motherfucker, I'm going to bite your fucking face. Right? But my tooth fell out like a pinball.

It, like, fucking landed in my mouth. It's going back. Like a pinball machine. And fell on the ground. I was like, oh, man. Yeah. Well, I have learned a lot of shit on this episode, man. Have me back, and I got to wait a lot more.

I know you do. We are scratching the surface, I'm sure. Dude, thank you so much, Andy, for coming on. Will you please, one more time, promote whatever you'd like, whatever the hell you can remember. All right. RipRide Podcast with me. I do it at PizzaNista, AndyRoy18 Instagram.

I do Dear Andy. Link my bio with that stuff. AndyRoy18 at Yahoo.com. You can look, find me with all that stuff. And that's it, man. That's it. That's me. All right, brother.

Well, thank you for coming on. I really appreciate it, man. Pleasure to have you on. I am Ryan Sickler on all social media, RyanS sickler.com talk to y'all next week yeah Bye.