The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Chad Daniels - HoneyDaniels

Episode Date: January 29, 2024

My HoneyDew this week is comedian Chad Daniels! Chad Highlights the Lowlights of his relationship with his estranged father. SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://youtube.com/@rsickler SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! You now get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! Sign up for a year and get a month free! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew What’s your story?? Submit at [e-mail] CATCH ME ON TOUR https://www.ryansickler.com/tour SUBSCRIBE to The HoneyDew Clips Channel http://bit.ly/ryansicklerclips SUBSCRIBE TO THE CRABFEAST PODCAST https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crabfeast-with-ryan-sickler-and-jay-larson/id1452403187 SPONSORS: Microdose -Get 30% off your first order, plus free shipping today at https://www.microdose.com and use promo code HONEYDEW

The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler. Welcome back to The Honeydew, y'all. We're over here doing it in the Night Pant Studios. I'm Ryan Sickler, ryansickler.com and Ryan Sickler on all your social media. I want to start this episode like I start them all with saying thank you. Thank you for whether you're new here, whether you've been here. Thank you for supporting this channel. Thank you for supporting this show. Subscribe, all that good stuff, guys. And if you've got to have more than you've got to have the Patreon, it's called the

Honeydew with y'all. And it is the wildest. It's the wildest show on Patreon. I'll put it up against anybody else's show because it's your stories. And nobody's got stories like y'all. All right. You can get that. You get the Honeydew a day early. You get it ad free at no additional cost. Make sure you're checking out the new show, The Way Back.

It's all your favorite guests and podcasting. We've got a ton of them banked. That's every Thursday right here on this YouTube channel. And if you're looking for a new podcast to listen to, I'm telling you, you've got to listen to The Crab Feast. The podcast has been dead over five years. It did over 1.1 million downloads last year. Thank you for that. And I'm telling you again, everybody you know and love in podcasting, except for today's guest, apparently, who I don't know how the hell we didn't get him on there. But different stories, all of it.

All right. So dates, Ryan Sickler dot com. That's the biz. You guys know what we're doing over here. We're highlighting the lowlights. I always say these are the stories behind the storytellers. And I'm very excited to have this guest on first time on the honeydew ladies and gentlemen please welcome chad daniels welcome to the honey thank you thank you so much

from the twin cities that's right listen we don't even need to sugarcoat it thank you for your patience we've had 40 minutes of uh technical difficulties which is i'm sorry it's the first time we ever had that no problem for your patience i've enjoyed sitting here talking well i like looking at all the pictures and yeah so i got to see every single one of them twice a lot it's good chad daniels welcome uh before we get into it please plug promote everything and anything you would like well socials is that chad daniels because there's a uh kid named chad Daniels in the Bay Area that beats me to everything, you prick. He won't give it back? No, no.

He won't? No, I've asked. So, yeah, and then chaddaniells.com slash tour for all my tour dates. I got a real big one coming up. I'm just finishing up this one and then it starts again. So I don't ever take a break. It's like this is all I do. So people are like, when are you going back on tour? I was like like back on tour, bitch. I've been on tour for 25 years.

Yeah. Well, 20. You don't ever take a break? I take the summers off, I guess. Yeah. But it's never, you know, like a huge break to start a new hour. It's just whenever I'm at that spot, when summer hits, that's it. Because I go up to northern Minnesota, enjoy the lakes and relax. that's it because i go up to northern minnesota enjoy the lakes and relax all right yeah so i know you and i um talked for your you did an epic special uh back uh what about three years ago maybe during the pandemic wasn't it yeah i don't know if we need to call it a special i don't know how special those were but anyways people like to toss that turn turn around quite a bit there's no fucking special in this. I know that.

But I got to talk to you a little bit and really get to know more about you there. But I would like to talk to you here because you have an interesting story that resonates with me. But before we get into it, you originally – are you born and raised in Minnesota? Yeah, Fergus Falls, Minnesota. Okay. Born and raised. So until February, I lived a mile and a half away from the hospital in which I was born. Just till this year? Yeah. Oh, wow. So you stayed local the whole time.

Yeah. You never lived here or anywhere else in New York or anything? I didn't. I lived in Minneapolis. And then I guess I was away from Fergus Falls for maybe 10 years total. But when I had both the kids, we moved back up. My ex-wife is from there too. And we were like, well, let's get everybody closer to family. And yeah. So then I've been there raising the kids. And as soon as my daughter went to college, I was like, I'll get you later.

15 minutes out of here. Yeah. That's where you went. Yeah. So what's growing up like? You've got mom and dad. But I know things shift for you a little bit. But before we get there, tell me, what's uh growing up like you got mom and dad but um i know things shift for you a little bit what but before we get there tell me what's dad do what's mom do mom is when i'm real young

she's a uh teller at a bank and then she old school yeah yeah yes exactly yeah uh then she became uh she worked at a power company so she was the person that you would go give your bills to. Oh, pay the bills to. And she was wonderful, right? People would come in. They'd say, hey, I can't pay this month. And she'd be like, well, it's winter. Let's figure something out.

I mean, she would never send those to collection because she didn't want people to have their electricity. Yeah. So she's a great woman now as she's gotten older she's reposted some shit on facebook where i've been like where's the bill lady where's the woman who loves everybody why don't you quit sharing your fucking friends nonsense so so that has that's been a bit much there's been a a shift in the seniority. Well, I went to her door once and I'm like, what the fuck is going on with you with this Facebook thing? She started crying. I'm like, that's not going to work for me.

I have a teenage daughter. You think I haven't seen tears before? Enough. And so she was like, yeah, I know. I just, you know, I want my friend. And I go, nah, if I said that to you when I was a teenager, you'd have fucking smacked me. So don't even think about it.

Wow. All right. But great, great, great woman, all in all. Her parents were around quite a bit, almost always. When my sister and I would get dropped off so my parents could have a weekend. Because they had me when I was 19. Wow. Time out.

They had me when they were 19. Gotcha. That'd be pretty cool if I came out as a 19-year-old. Like, goddammit. You. Time out. They had me when they were 19. That'd be pretty cool if I came out as a 19 year old like, god damn it. You're already driving. Jesus Christ. I had been fucking kicking and kicking.

Let me out, bitch. So, pretty ridiculous. Just born an instant adult. Get the fuck out of here. Oh god, you're kicking me out already? I just got here. While you're 19. get the fuck out of here oh god you're kicking me out already i just got here well you're 19 get the fuck out of here so uh so when they were 19 so they still had life to live so we'd end up at my grandparents quite a bit and that was my my mom's parents my dad's parents um when my dad was two, he had a sister.

So his sister was born when he was two. And then his dad split. He was an over, like long haul trucker. And he took off. He's like, this is too much for me. Two kids. The second one's too much. And then his mom had a mental breakdown.

And so then he grew up with his grandparents. He was raised by his grandparents, which is kind of weird because now we're talking about the mid-50s, right? And you're looking back at now a generation – he's being raised by two generations ago, which is wild to think about. Because mid-50s, you're a little kid, you know, things are starting to happen. But these old-ass grandparents knew none of it. And so that's kind of a weird time, I think, things are starting to happen. But these old ass grandparents knew none of it. And so that's kind of a weird time, I think, to grow up. But so that was that. And they grew up in the same town, northern Minnesota, about an hour away from where I grew up. They were both great athletes. My dad was a, my mom and dad were both two sport athletes. Yeah. What'd your mom play?

She played volleyball and basketball. Is she tall? She's not. No. No. All right. No. But she was a setter, just real good, real, real athletic. And then my dad played football and baseball. So you've had extended family all around you for forever then. Yeah. Okay. Yep. It's been nice. And I think that's why we ended up bringing the kids back closer to their grandparents because it's just how we grew up yeah and are your um well we'll talk about your dad a minute your mom she's a great a really good grandmom yep yeah yep good yeah still around still lives she lives but she goes and sees the kids hangs out she lives three

blocks away from no wonder you so you walked over to get there yeah yeah yeah you have to try it's like i'm gonna take the dog for a walk and go scream at your stupid grandmother that's nice that's nice guess what when people storm the capital it's pretty similar to storming target isn't it maybe we don't need to think one of them's awesome and the other one is fucking hurtful. Target's a pretty big corporation. Oh, so funny. So then what's your, do your parents stay together or do they split? They stayed together until I was 15. Okay. But even as a child, you're just like, oh, these two should not.

This is like, they're hanging on for dear life. And are they arguing or just not around each other? I just remembered a very interesting. So first of all, I remember witnessing a couple of things. My dad for my mom's birthday one year brought her to go watch softball games. Wait, you're say it again. For my mom's birthday, she was like, what are we going to do? Do you have anything planned? And he brought us all to go watch softball games. Not professional, just like random. Or anyone you know.

Right. Just like random softball games. And I remember he. That's so weird. I know. He just took you to random softball games. Like, this is what we're going to do. We're going to watch these people play.

Yeah. And I was 10 years old. And I i wrote because we just moved into this house and i remember he called my mom thunder thighs and i was 10 and i was like dude uh-uh you know like what am i gonna do right i'm like just yell at him and just waiting for the hand to go under my chin. That was his big move to like quiet you. And so I was like, well, here it comes. That was what he said to shut up a hand under the chin. That yeah. So he would, he would take me like under here and just put my, the back of my head against

a wall, not hard, not like through it. Just like that was, that was the, we're, we're done talking. That was that. This is your final one. Yeah. was that was the we're done talking that was that this is your final one yeah so you know cut to me figuring out what i like in the bedroom and uh this poor woman fucking chokes me and i'm like your fucking hands off my neck right now this poor woman chokes me do you not like that it's like i don't know what's going on. I'm crying. I don't.

Not supposed to talk, but I need to tell you this stuff. So, yeah, dude, it was. I just started going to this MNRI, it's called. It's basically reflexology and the nervous system and everything. And she was like, she grabbed my wrist and she would pull to see how my, you know, my arms would extend. And she goes, well, your arms are a little tight. You're a little guarded. And like, oh, am I? Huh? I mean, I've been grabbed by the bicep over 10,000 times in my life. So anytime an arm goes towards my arms, I'm just like, suck it in. So, um, he called her thunder thighs. I'm like, well, happy birthday.

This seems great. Well, just so you know, I know he called you thunder thighs, but we are going to watch softball. I mean, what a stupid ass. God damn it. So what's your, what's your relationship like with them the first 15 years of your life um fine i mean besides the this is how you stop talking and this is whatever um it was fine i mean he taught me how to mow a lawn to make sure the stripes were right he taught me how did he teach you it's uh you go you go one one pass to give yourself space to rotate it and then you go now it's down and back no none of this optical illusion bullshit where from above it looks like you're falling into something it's down and back down and back and then did he tell you after because i learned this one too

then you next time you go the opposite way and it's supposed to like really cut the yard oh i didn't when i used to cut grass they make us go this way and then next time i come back to like now go this way i'm like all right all right, all right, you guys got your ways. Like checkerboard it? Well, you're saying against it. I see what you're saying. Yeah, it doesn't look checkerboard because it's grown back now, but now we cut this way every time,

so now we're going to go cut it a whole different way, yeah. I remember we had one of those metal window well things for a basement window, and I was trying to get as close as i could with the lawnmower and the blade hit it and nicked it and i'm like well this is uh i suppose i should get my affairs in order because i think i'm about to die i mean it's like you handed me this fucking machine with a blade i'm a kid put gas in it yeah i think about it all the time and it's like and you didn't think something like this was gonna happen you know the fact that like my little sister hasn't been run over is incredible so were you guys just hustling i'm gonna ask you this real quick were you just hustling

like shoveling snow and stuff was that a big job for you guys growing up yeah we were outdoor stuff yeah just going and cleaning neighbors driveways and and shit for Miss Anne or whatever. Yep, yep. Trying to just make – $20. $20? Where the fuck do you grow up? I'm saying that now. I'm like – I never got a $20.

Oh, yeah. I'm like shoveling. I get five or six or three. That's what they throw you. You shovel and you go – They'd call my parents and be like, can you send Chad over to shovel? And then I'd go shovel. I remember this one lady, Dorothy, shoveled out right like she was a shut-in shoveled her out sidewalks

driveways back patios so she could go smoke all that stuff brought me some lemonade and i'm like i'm like bitch can you at least take the ice out it's the middle of winter can you heat up this lemonade or something unbelievable okay back to your wait i do have one more question i wrote it down here because i think about this a lot did you ever or do you ever remember seeing your parents affectionate hug kiss one another at all hold a hand yeah i remember uh that they kissed when when we're like okay this is coming to an end, right? Trying to explain to my sister, our parents aren't going to be married anymore, whatever. And they kissed underneath the mistletoe during Christmas at my grandparents' house. And my

sister looked at me like, Hey, maybe I'm like, don't do it. Don't get your hopes up kid. That kind of stuff. So it wasn't a ton. I did hear my dad once. So I have a girlfriend now and she is like, uh, sometimes she'd be like, why don't you, how come you never, you know, approach me and try to like woo me into the bedroom? I'm like, well, I don't know if you're feeling it. I don't know. The thing that I would hate most on planet Earth is for a woman that I love to just take it as a womanly duty. You know, you know this shit happens all the time. And I would not be able to handle that if they're just like, well, I did that for you. Well, fuck, that's gross. I agree.

I don't get off on any of that. Like, unless you're into it, I'm not into it. Right, exactly. I don't care what it is. I don't care how much I like it. Right. Including sex. If you're not into it, I'm not into it.

Yeah, of course. So I'm just not into that shit. And I was talking about it. And then I go, oh, I remember this thing. Our basement was being redone. And so my sister and I had to sleep in the living room on the couches. And then my parents would stay up and watch television in the same room. And then I remember my dad once said, my mom said something. She got mad at him. She yelled at him. She goes, enough. And then then my dad goes if you don't have sex with me tonight

i'm not going to your parents house this weekend you heard that and you're a little kid and you're like well i know what all that stuff is and this is horrible and then the worst thing about it is then he was there at my grandparents and so i'm like, you guys fuck. That's disgusting. Bagged my mom, bro. Yeah. And in a weird, forceful way. And so I just, that has turned me off to the idea of even if my girlfriend was like, hey, I don't feel great right now, but we haven't seen each other in a while. I'd really love to do this for everybody. There's no chance in hell I'm doing that. And I know maybe that, I don't know, that puts me in some category in the big book of you know mental stuff

but i don't know i can't handle it i'm with you on that i'm totally with you on that you got to be into it yeah yeah i don't that's like taking somebody to a fucking football game like you fucking believe this game like all right you know yeah like i don't want you there you know what i don't want a blow job on my birthday because this seems like an act of service no thank you yeah all right so you and your dad now your dad your parents split it you're 15 yep and what happens when they split you go with mom do you go with dad what happened went went with mom dad lived about a mile from moms and saw him i'm gonna guess twice a year so it's very strange a mile yeah i hear this so it's so funny i hear it from so many people about my mom did the same thing she moved a mile it was like a mile and a half away and was like nah

that's your mom did yeah my mom oh so this is flipped okay mine mine's flipped my dad dies at 16 but just before that my mom was like i'm out and she bounced and moved i mean right down the fucking it's about a half down the street not Not three towns over or leaving Maryland and going to Minnesota. It's like, I'm going to go right there. Where you have a chance to run into them at the grocery store, at anything, in traffic. It's so strange. It's wild. So your dad's like, I'm out.

Yep. But doesn't want to see you? Or is this your choice? How does that happen? I mean, it had to have been his choice, I would imagine. But then what he would do you don't remember your mom ever like you're not going over there for any protective reasons no no no it was nothing like that um then my dad around the holidays would always find a woman to court and really woo her and then she would end up buying us the big ticket items for christmas nah he hustled these ladies like that.

Yeah. Like give me – what do you remember getting? So I got a TV. Your dad hustled a woman into getting you a TV? I got a stereo. You know, when CDs were at their prime, it was like the speakers, the sub, like all this stuff. And how do you know they're getting it? Because is he not working or like? Because he would say that like this one lady, Daniil was her name.

Daniil. Pretty cool name. That is. I've never met a Daniil. I'll tell you something. As a young man, I'm a teenager and I'm like, she's good looking. And then I'd go to his apartment to unwrap these gifts that he didn't buy and then there's like candles burnt down that the wax is over the table and you're like well i know what this is for this is fucking disgusting don't bring me to this house of sin to give me this christmas present and then uh i'll get a tv and he'll be like, well, just so you know, you know, Daniil pitched in on this. And then you'd see her roll her eyes. And you're like, okay, I know exactly what's happening right now. And then you'd see him again in like February or something and be like, where's Daniil?

I'm like, that didn't work out. It never does. November to January. Worked out for you. Yeah. November to January is about when. Is that right? You would notice that pattern? Yep. And they would all get you something. you. Yeah. November to January is about when. Is that right? You would notice that pattern?

Yep. And they would all get you something. Always. Always. And it was always big ticket. Yeah. Man, that's a good little hustle your dad got going on over there. It's pretty slick.

And is he in touch with your mom at all? They don't ever communicate? No. He left her in bankruptcy. Oh, shit. I mean, he was a real gambler. So I didn't bankruptcy. Oh, shit. I mean, he was a real gambler. So I didn't know. Oh, is that right?

I didn't know to the extent. It was alcohol, drugs, gambling. When I was in sixth grade, I came home from school and my dad was home, which is weird. He was a liquor salesman, which is like pretty good for an alcoholic, right? Just like, hey, here's a box of stuff for you to ruin your life with. And so I got home and he had a VHS tape and he goes, you got to come down here and watch this. So I don't really know what I'm watching, but it is a man who's doing standup comedy, but he's got a bucket on his head and he's doing

impersonations. And I was like, all right like all right he goes i work with this guy he's so funny last night i brought him down to minneapolis and we got this tape at scott hansen's comedy gallery and uh i'm gonna manage him and so your dad's going into management yeah my dad my dad's saying was i don't want a white picket fence i want white pillars that was his big wow that was his saying yeah and then he came up with these ideas of like here's what we're gonna do we're going to put an ad in the paper and then people are going to give us money to go down to minneapolis to buy their christmas presents for them because they don't want to go down there i'm like everyone wants to go down there this is buy their Christmas presents for them because they don't want to go down there. I'm like, everyone wants to go down there. This is going to not be good at all. And

so he got like two offers, lost money on the deal because of gas, like all this stuff. He was always trying to, you know, get rich quick. And so he shows me this, say he's going to manage this guy, start picking stuff out, Start, you know what? I know you want these jeans that we can't afford. We're going to get them. Like all this stuff. So cut to, I am now a standup comedian. All this time has passed.

I've heard stories about my dad, all this stuff. And I'm working with this guy. And at the end of his set, he puts a fucking bucket on his head. And I go, I've seen this before. And I start thinking. And it is the dude from the tape. And so afterwards. And by the way, I'm headlining the show.

He's opening. And so I go, do you know Steve Daniels? And he was like, yeah, I used to work with him. I go, that's my dad. He showed me a tape of you when I was in sixth grade. Not realizing how big of a slap in the face that is. It's like, remember when you were doing this when I was in sixth grade? I'm better at it now.

You know, that's such a shithead move. I was probably 28. For 22 years, this dude's clothes, there's been a bucket on his head can you imagine that's in your rider i need a bucket at the club i ain't travel with the bucket so you guys sell beer by the bucket right okay leave the beer out of one of them i'm gonna need that fuck out 22 years with the bucket closer so he's real mad oh so he did get offended by it? Oh, terribly offended. Yeah. Which part? I'm more offended that you're closing with a bucket on your head for two decades. So then he ends up coming around on the weekend.

And he goes, well, I suppose you got some questions about your old man. And I go, no. I go, well, I mean, you're going to tell me some stories. So my dad, let me pause this story because I got to tell you something else. I was just about to ask you, yeah, because there seems to be like you're not talking to your father. Oh, yeah, I'm not talking to my father at this point. He's out of my life for a while. At what age does that happen?

The last time I saw my dad was 26. Until now? Until, yeah, because, well, I think he's dead. All right, we're going to circle back. Oh, dead. All right. We're going to circle back. Oh, yeah. We're going to circle back. This is going to be one of these Quentin Tarantino movies. He was still dating some hot ladies at Christmas and now he's gone?

Yeah. All right. We'll come back to that. So that, like when he was dating the hot ladies at Christmas, I was in high school. Okay. So when my dad would come home on payday, he would have one of two things in his hand. He would have crab legs or he would have the chicken chow mein in that two sectioned can where the top you'd break the little film and then the top would

be the gravy and the meat and the bottoms, everything else. And so if he had chicken chow mein, I would send my sister downstairs because it was about to be World War III, right? Because it's like, that's the cheapest thing you can buy right after ramen. And a crab leg. Yeah. And so you're like, well, he doesn't have any money and it's payday. Uh-oh. So we'd go downstairs and if it was crab legs, it was like fucking party central. So I find out how he's

losing all of his money on payday is he used to go into the bar after he'd get his check. Cash his check, by the way. Never put any away. And he would make these bets on something like a fly landing on the bar. Wait, he's not betting on sports on the TV? Oh, no, no, no. He's betting random people at the bar. He's like, I'll give you 10 to to 1 odds 10 to 1 he's throwing out

on 50 so it's 500 if he loses on which fly land or if the fly lands on one of us if it lands on you you get 500 lands on me i get listen if you're making that bet you better have wiped yourself down in shit or something to win this bet and he's just losing constantly right and at one point this guy goes people were this was i'm sorry i've never heard i know i broke on those guys i have a cousin who went broke on getting sports gambling not even sports that's what i'm saying i've never heard of just throwing out these bets like bet that guy uses a pencil instead of a pen how much i'll give you yeah never heard of just throwing out these bets like bet that guy uses a pencil instead of a pen how much i'll give you yeah one on that exactly like those kind of bets

just going around and pissing away your fortune that guy that guy pulls a pen out of his pocket and it's fucking chicken chow mein dude i mean it's crazy to think about i'm i'm a father and i could never even imagine that shit never never yeah so he's telling me all these stories um that so he tells me all the gambling stories and stuff and i'm like okay this is starting to make sense do you let him still do spots i've never i haven't seen him since that weekend oh i haven't seen him since that we just came back to hang out he's not working with you oh yeah he yeah. He was working. This is the same weekend. So the Thursday night is when I said, I know you.

Got it. And then Saturday is when he finally tells me these stories. Got it. Okay. And so I hadn't even heard of that guy until I was golfing in the town where they worked as liquor reps. And I said, they go, what do you do for a living? I go, I'm a standup comedian.

They go, oh, do you know so-and-so? And I go, that name sounds familiar. And they go what do you do for a living i'm a stand-up comedian they go oh do you know so and so and i go that name sounds familiar and they go uh bucket and i'm like i do but don't tell him don't tell him i'm here yeah i mean wild you probably heard of microdosing but if not just know that all sorts of people are microdosing to feel healthier and perform better. You know that just right feeling when your body and mind are really at peace, like after a workout or a nice long shower where you're relaxed, focused, and a little energized. Being in the zone, well, microdose can help you get into that zone easier and stay there longer. For me, half a microdose gummy during the day helps me stay centered and fresh. It doesn't bog me down, which means I can get everything done on my list. They're even great at night, help you wind down, be present in the moment instead of worrying about things from that

day or about what's coming up tomorrow. All right. To learn more about microdosing THC, go to microdose.com and use code honeydew to get free shipping and 30% off your first order. Again, that's microdose.com code honeydew. Microdose.com code honeydew for 30% off. Now, let's get back to the do. So, yeah. So, I got to know some stories about my old man through him. Um, if we go back two years before that, well, let's, okay.

Let's go back to when dad, you and dad stopped talking first. Okay. I'm 15 and I get confirmed at Lutheran church And my mom always had on top of the refrigerator, there was a Bible. And my mom always had these unique bills, US bills in there. So it would be like one was printed with blue ink or one was shifted a little. You can see the lines where they're supposed to be cut, but it was shifted. So they're almost like error cards when you collect baseball cards. Yeah, I know.

I think they're worth money, aren't they? They're worth more because there aren't any of those. Right. Yeah. And so one of them was a dollar bill with both sides printed on the same side. And then the other side was blank. Oh, okay. Okay. Right. So you got the front and the back on the same side and then the other side was blank and so oh yeah okay not okay right so

you got the front and the back on the same side it didn't flip clean yep yep okay and so um my my mom has those in the bible my dad shows up with a present must have not been fucking anybody at that time because he had to do it and it is a frame and i open it i'm thinking it's like going to be a picture of a sports person or something it is those bills that my mom had collected when she was at the bank those bills framed your dad stole your mom's bills to give me framed them yeah and gave them to you for a Christmas present? Yeah. For a confirmation present. Get the fuck out of here. In front of your mom? In front of her.

No. She watched me open it. Did she just go nuts? She, my mom is such a good woman that she, a good person, that she just took it all in stride. But I could see in her face, her face dropped. And so immediately, as soon as he leaves, I go, I don't want these. These are yours. You can have them.

She goes, no, no, this is good. This would be a good present for you. I go, I'm not taking them. She goes, go ahead and take them. It's fine. I'm like, okay. So I've never had it up. I took them out of the frame and just put them back.

Do you know what they're worth? Have you ever had them? No. However. That's got to be, that one that's got nothing on the back has got to be worth a chunk. I mean, I don't know anything about anything. Interesting. You sound like my dad at this point. Because now, fast forward, I know this is going all over the place, but I'm 26. My son is two years old. He's never met my son. Don't even know if he knows I have a son.

two years old he's never met my son don't even know if he knows i have a son but that christmas he is calling on a landline non-stop and so it's like it's your dad it's your dad it's finally i go what i haven't and i hadn't talked to him in i'll say five years at this point so i just want to ask the reason you stopped communicating with him is because he gave you this fucking horrific gift the reason you stopped communicating with him is because he gave you this fucking horrific gift. The reason I stopped communicating. This is going to get crazy. The reason I stopped communicating with him is because he had me unknowingly help him steal a car to leave town to avoid the authorities. Dude, we'll get there.

We'll get there. How much time you got? We got all day, bro. How much time you got? We got all day, bro. How much time you got? You were patient with me. I'm going to be patient with you. It's insane. Okay.

So where am I at? We're jumping to 26. 26. My son's two, blah, blah, blah. He's calling like crazy. Yeah, he's calling. And I go, what do you want and he goes i was just at a coin show in las vegas that's where he had moved las vegas and he goes i was

just at a coin show and i saw a dime that had both sides printed on one like indented on one and the other side was flat and it went for millions. He goes, let me come get that bill and I'll split it with you. And I'm like, it's not yours. You took it once when it wasn't yours. I'm not giving it to you again. This goes to whatever. And he goes, let me get it. So he kept calling. I go, here's the deal. I go, I hand you this bill. P.S. You have a two-year-old. That he's never seen his grandson. Let me come get the bill. Yeah, it doesn't mention it once. Yeah, right.

Let me come get the bill. Congrats. How you doing? Hey, by the way, just right in, I was at a coin show. Yeah. That sounds like an addict. Yeah, I mean, for sure. You know, all that pre-conversation he's already had in his head, too.

Right. And now I'm just spitting this out. And another thing. Like, what? Another? We haven't talked in 15 years. What are you talking about? Right.

So I go, you come get this. And then that's it. I don't want to hear from you again. You're giving it to him. I'm going to give you this as a deal that you do not contact me again. And he's like, okay. Okay. All right.

His own kid. That feels good. So he shows up at my place. This is when I'm the 10 years I did not live in Fergus Falls. I was about an hour South of Minneapolis. He shows up and he goes, uh, it's got this pretty nice car. And I go, that's, that's a nice car. And he goes, yeah, I went in to get the loan and they must've thought I was like a different Steve Daniels. Cause they had, the address was different, all that stuff. But I let him think it.

I got the car. I'm like, yep, I remember you. You know, it's just like, hey, dad, you're the fucking worst of humanity because now there's a Steve Daniels that has to eat this loan and explain everything and whatever. And so he comes in and and he's like, so where is it? Where's the bill? And I go, I'll give it to you. Relax. And I go, Isaac, this is Steve.

Steve, this is Isaac. Yeah. Because then, then he goes, uh, Isaac, my son, he goes, who's this man? And he started to say, I'm here. And I go, he's just a guy. He is just a guy. And I just stared at him and he goes, wow. And I go, well, you've fucking got to earn it.

There's certain things in the world you have to earn and being a grandpa is one of them. Right. And so he goes, all right, well, I'll just take that and get out of your hair. And I go, no problem. But first we're going to arm wrestle because he used to make me arm wrestle all the time and just fucking knuckles to table, destroy me. And I'm like like guess what bitch your son's been your son's been lifting and he's in his prime and i know this is probably really

catty and really small but i just fucking all right let's go fucking over the top oh i just i thought i was gonna pull his elbow right out of the joint. But. How good did that feel? It felt pretty good, you know. And what did he do? What was his response? He goes, oh, oh, I guess you've been exercising, huh? I'm like, get the fuck out of here. So then I just gave him the thing. He split.

And that's the last time I ever heard from him. My sister had heard from him. Kept his word at least for that? Yeah. That's the thing he kept his word on. Well, I think he died. So pretty easy to do. I see.

Yeah. I see. Pretty easy to do. He did a methadone clinic for a while. Oh, you do know that much. Well, he had – so his sister kind of had been in contact with him and told us afterwards. But I guess he got in a car accident or something and my sister knew some of it. I didn't want to – I didn't give a fuck.

I didn't need to know any of it because like I'm concentrating on like shifting this two generations of bad dads. I'm concentrating on fixing that. So I don't need you to be around that kind of shit. But you were saying your sister, had she maybe heard from him or something in the time you didn't? She had heard from him. Yeah, a couple of times because she went to she went to rehab as well. And so she had heard from him in there. And he called her and he's like, well, I heard from your aunt that you're in rehab.

And he goes, what are you doing? I was like, how are you being this judgmental? Not how are you doing? What are you doing? Yeah. So I will tell you this. You get – and this is going to sound like I'm making excuses, but I really believe this. You get drugs, alcohol, financial problems from a gambling addiction.

That can turn a good person into a real pile of shit really quickly. I do remember my old man, when it would snow, he would drive around with me and we would find people that were stuck and he would, we'd get out, he'd bring a shovel, we'd get out and we'd push him out. So there was goodness there, but I think that that gets wiped out once, you know. The disease sets in. You're just spiraling down. Absolutely. And that's true with Dix. He's hitting them alcohol, gambling, I, drugs. You're not long on this planet with that lifestyle at all. how could he how could he yeah he talks somebody into giving him uh a rental place into giving him a van he moves everything out of the van takes the seats out that are there and he puts in a card table and like a disco ball he wasn't that's what he did wasn't allowed in bars so he's like drive around and have my own bar so he's driving

a group of people around partying in this van and he gets nailed for his eighth dui that's pretty fucking legendary that's how they pull him over pretty legendary yeah it was a full page spread in the paper i was a sophomore spot yeah yeah. Steve's spot. Yeah. It got in the paper and everything. I was a sophomore in high school. That's crazy. And I was a smart ass because you're just dealing with everything by deflecting. And a couple of the seniors made a bunch of copies of the article.

And for morning football practice, it was plastered all over the locker room. And was like jesus no they do not really do that and i had a geometry teacher mr pearson who was always really strict with me because i was a smart ass but that day he came over as i was doing my work in class put his hand on my shoulder gave it one little squeeze and then that was it just Just that silent little. How about that? Yeah. Isn't it funny that just one little thing like that could really fucking change shit about a person too. Yeah.

You got this thing going on with your dad and then you got that moment right there with that dude. Like poof. And he was, after that moment, like, you know, I'd get offered twins tickets or Vikings tickets or whatever just because of the job. And I couldn't go. He was always my first call hell yeah just like hey man if you want to go go for it that'll squeeze yeah did he ever take you up on it oh yeah fuck yeah dude i love that go back to telling me about why you stopped talking to your dad we didn't tell that story. You said the car. Oh, the car. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So I'm 21. I get a car, which, by the way, took me a very long time because when I was in high school, my dad had stolen my identity to get electric phone, an apartment. When do you find that out, though?

When I try to get electric phone an apartment. When do you find that out though when I try to get electric credit? Apartments and everyone's like fuck you dude. You owe us money already. I'm like that's impossible I lived with my mom so she had to write a letter Witnesses that said I lived with her all this stuff and so Finally get that taken care of and I get a car and it starts acting up. It's a used car. Two days after I get it, it starts acting up. So I bring it back to the dealership and they go, all right, there's an engine issue.

And I'm like, should you have told me that before I bought it? So then they have to rebuild the engine and they go, we'll give you a rental car. I'm like, all right, no problem. Hadn't heard from my dad for a long time. He's living in Fargo, North Dakota, no problem. Hadn't heard from my dad for a long time. He's living in Fargo, North Dakota, which is about an hour away from Fergus Falls. And he goes, somehow he's just in the network of my family and knows stuff. And he goes, hey, I heard you got a car. I'm like, yeah. He goes, yeah, but the engine problem, right?

You got a rental car? I'm like, I do. And he goes, well, well listen i know i haven't talked in a while i would love it if you and your sister could come up and go to lunch okay you know because you always it's your dad so you always want to give him that chance to make things right and he just didn't have it in him so we go to lunch and he goes sisters with you two sisters with me and uh he goes oh i gotta put my stuff in your car do you mind and i was like i guess and he goes out and he's gone for i'm gonna guess 20 minutes i'm like did you get lost yeah wow couldn't find it okay so comes back still has his bag then he calls me maybe two weeks later and he goes, you still have that rental car? And I'm like, no, I gave it back because my car got fixed. And he goes, all right, I need you to come get me in Fargo. Okay. Well, he had just done a little bit of jail time for

writing bad checks, but he was going to go to prison. And he's like, I won't last in prison. He knew it. And so I didn't know this until I drove him all the way back from Fargo to Fergus Falls. Anytime I would go one mile over the speed limit, one mile per hour, he'd be like, slow down. I'm like, okay. You know, not knowing what's going on. So I go, where do you want to go? He goes, bring me to Moore Ford. And I go, all right.

So we go in there and he goes, all right, drive around and find your rental car. I'm like, what are you talking about? During lunch, he had taken my keys and made a copy of the key because he knew this whole thing was a scam for him to be able to get into that rental car and run away from the cops. So I finally find it. So that 20 minutes or whatever, he's gone. He was getting a copy of the key. Yeah. Come on, come to lunch with your old man.

Drive two hour round trip. Okay, so now he tells you to find the rental car. So find the rental car. He gets out. He takes, I remember this because I'd never seen it before. He takes his driver's license. What are the odds that it's still there? Anyone else could have rented that car. Well, I think it's.

Oh, like one of their. One of their used cars that they just let him use. Like a little loner. Yeah. Gotcha. So he takes his driver's license and scrapes it because there's frost on the windshield. And I remember that. I'm like, ooh, all right, I'll keep that. With a dad like that, it is not often you go, all right, this is a learning moment, right? So I keep that. He gets in the car. I'm like, how do you have keys? He goes, so I made a copy of the key. I can't go to prison. I got to get

out of here. He goes, follow me out of town. So I follow him out of town and I get out of the car He drives that car right off the lot right off the lot. No one says anything. No. Oh, no, no, it's nighttime. Oh, okay Yeah, it's closed. It's been closed for a while. Okay. All right, so we take off and I'm thinking like oh He wants me to follow him out of town. Give me a hug obviously cuz he's taken off He's like I get out of my car and he goes get back in your car so i roll the window down he's like do you see anybody behind you i'm like no he goes all right i'm out of here i go oh i go why did i follow you out here and he goes well just one car in front of me and a cop if that and i was like okay you're running you know how some parents they like uh back when there were remote controls and they

before remote controls and they were like hey go turn the channel that's what some parents use their kids for not me i hit the jackpot my dad used me to steal a car and then run interference on a potential cop so he could get out of town is that literally the last time you saw him until the building until the 20 until? Until I was 26. That's how he left. And then you don't hear from him until the bill. Yeah. Do you know if that bill is worth anything?

I have no clue. I mean, for all I know, my dad is alive and fucking living in a mansion somewhere on that bill. But good. I mean, it doesn't matter to me. Maybe D.B. Cooper and that shit, bro. So I want to talk to you about um well you have two kids right two yep and only the oldest met your father your youngest has never met your dad right and do you tell do you still tell them story like are you honest about your dad you gotta ask

absolutely do you have pictures of them around or anything like that they have seen pictures so it's funny we're going through a picture album and then there's a photocopied piece of paper and there's a driver's license that has my dad's picture on it and then a bunch of credit cards. And this was sent to my mom by the

what's it called? Child. What do you have to pay for child support? Yeah. Jesus Christ. He was supposed to be paying child support. So it was like a child support collection person found out, listen to this piece of shit. You haven't even heard the worst of it.

This was crazy. I love it. I mean, I don't love it for you, but I can't believe there's another one. Oh, yeah. He's already ruined your credit. Oh is why it's all police this isn't even about me he had a classmate that after graduation died in a motorcycle accident he called their family to find out, to tell them, you guys are supposed to be getting benefits. What's his social security number? Stole his identity. No. Yeah. And had, so it's Thomas Rice had his ID said Thomas Rice, all his credit cards.

And so they had found him. Oh, that's what your mom got. Yeah. She got this- Under Thomas Rice, all his credit cards. And so they had found him. Oh, that's what your mom got. Yeah, she got this piece of paper under Thomas Rice. And then you looked at when he went in to get the license. And it was June 19th, which is my dad's real birthday. But then the birthday on there was Thomas Rice's birthday. So he had all the other information. So once he got his social security number, he was able to become Thomas Rice.

I guess he ended up getting a really good job in Las Vegas. You know the people that offer you vacation packages? He was that guy. And he worked his way up to making over six figures a year and still- Tommy Rice's button pulling in six figures. Tommy Rice, six figures a year and still tommy rice's button six figures 150 g for tommy r and he still fucks it up because he's in vegas it's so crazy to me it's like you have stolen a dead person's identity and was he getting those benefits too was he fucking catching those benefits i don't think there were benefits okay so he just said that to get the social security

numbers he told them there were what a piece of shit no shit i mean you're talking about parents that have lost a child and now they're waiting on benefits the only possible speck of sunlight in this situation and it's benefits that never come and their sons living out in las vegas selling vacation packages yeah yeah their new son their new kid god damn how do you find that out because your mom showed you like how do you guys put it all together because there was a private investigator that was looking for him for child support that went out and found out that this person on paper, this Thomas Rice, my dad, was making six figures at this company. And then maybe that's what spooked him. And then maybe that's why he took off. So, I mean, I don't know all of it, but I mean,

what the fuck? Holy shit, dude. That's wild. How do you even keep all that together? As far as what do you mean? All these stories and stuff like and then you're like yeah you seem very even keeled about like yeah i'll come out and meet you yeah because you're always wanting to give a chance right so what was it that shifted in you personally finally where you're like fuck this i think it was having a kid yeah yeah that's what i wanted to ask you next about the father you want to be yeah having a kid it was like all right listen we're 0 for 2 the last two generations. It's time to correct that and completely shift it.

And your mom was understanding about not introducing the kids to your dad at all or barely? Yeah. I mean, I don't – But you also seemed like you were okay with it. You said you had to earn it. Oh, yeah. It wasn't like you ever shut the door and said, fuck off. No.

And he just never took the opportunity. No. Yeah. My mom was always supportive. Whatever we wanted to do in that realm, she was like, yeah, that's your choice. That's what you do. All right. So what was it you said you, again, you took from your dad?

You're like, I'm going to take that. What was it? Oh, he scraped off the windshield with his driver's license. Right. Okay. Other things. Are there any other things you i know you only well you did spend 15 years yeah i mean is there any similarities he taught me how to shoot hoops he taught me how to throw he taught me a lot like a lot of sports stuff that i still use today that i i appreciate what about parenting stuff anything um yeah i suppose i suppose being funny with your kid like being goofy with your parenting stuff, anything. Yeah, I suppose being funny with your kids,

like being goofy with your kids, but also I'm the dad. I mean, you know, I've never ever grabbed my kid's arm or under the chin or anything like that. Yeah, like grabbing a neck and putting you against a wall to let you know like, hey. Yeah, and I forgot about that

until my mom and sister brought it up. Oh, i thought it was when the chick choked you no no because they brought it up when i was like early 20s or something and uh and they we saw something like that happen and i and i got up to go deal with the guy that did it to the kid and i go god damn i don't know what got into me. And they're like, you don't? And I'm like, oh, I don't know what you're talking about. And then they told me, they're like, that's how he used to always do that to you to shut you up.

And I'm like, oh, okay. I must have choked it down pretty hard. How was he with your sister? A lot better. Very protective. But he's still absent and everything. Manipulative and all that stuff. So I had gotten in big trouble once for stealing all my sister's money out of her piggy bank. And it wasn't me, but it was him.

Oh, no shit. And then I collected all this money. But it was him. Oh, no shit. And then I collected all this money. I had a paper route. And I collected all this money where I had to give most of that money to the actual paper company, the newspaper company. And I had it all in this incredible Hulk lunchbox gone. And I'm like, I know, I don't care if you stole it, but a lot of that wasn't mine.

Now I have to pay. You stole my money. Now I have to pay back for the rest of this shit that's wild he would steal that it was crazy it was crazy i'm not a violent person but i do think i'd punch him in the face i was gonna ask you if he called you today if he was alive and said he'd like to see you would you say yeah i think so would you punch him uh i don't think so but i mean because he's too old to be an old man right that's that's the thing i taught the doctor drew about that he goes look you at some point even though you have shitty parents you gotta just let it go because if you don't then you look like the younger person badgering

this old person that just visually looks feeble and everything and you become this asshole going after that person that person that old little fuck isn't the person that did all that shit to you back then. You know what I mean? Not now, they're not. Yeah. I will tell you that I struggled with forgiveness for so long. And then after I got a divorce, I realized forgiveness has nothing to do with the other person.

Yeah. Nothing. It is all about you just fucking letting go and cooling it and having a better life. That's it. Yeah, I didn't learn that until I was in my, God, my mid-30s maybe it was. And someone said to me, you can't forgive someone who isn't asking for forgiveness. If I'm not coming to you and saying, I'm sorry, please forgive me, what forgiveness do you get? I don't want that. I ain't asking for that. It is for yourself. It's all for yourself. I forgive me. Right. What forgiveness do you get? I don't want that.

I ain't asking for that. It is for yourself. It's all for yourself. I didn't realize either. I'm like, oh, I forgave this person. And then nothing fucking changed. Right. It was my mom.

Nothing changed. Right. Except for some words I said, and it was, oh, thank you very much. And that's it. And nothing changed. Yep. And then I was like, oh, she didn't even want that i wanted that yeah i wanted that for me next day bro next day you'll laugh i go to a dodger game and a fucking one of

the players throws the ball out left hand up boom grab it caught a ball i was like i've never caught a ball in a fucking game before fucking things things are going to turn around. My mom didn't change one fucking bit. I turned around. I gave that ball to a little girl in the crowd. I go, here you go. She had a little Dodger cap. There you go. And they were like, thank you so much.

I'm like, you're welcome. Things are going to be good with my mom. Nah. Didn't change one bit. Oh, shit. That's great. Dude, thank you for doing this. thanks for having me on of course this has been long overdue man it's been great to sit down who doesn't want to go back and revisit

fucking tragedy bro i'm tired of everybody's instagrams i want to hear all your low lights yeah i love it it's like blues for me you know what i mean that it's those i i always grew up my dad introduced me to the blues and i loved those songs where like these people could take the worst fucking thing about something put it in music and then you're over there cheering for it like yeah fuck yeah it made me feel good also makes you feel like you're not alone you know oh yeah i sit and listen to some there's definitely people out there that think they have a shitty dad and after this, they won't be like, they're going to call their dad and tell them they're sorry. And I'm not woe is me because, listen.

I can tell. I had a really good life. I always say that with both your parents, you get a total of 100 points. And it just matters on which the thing is. And my mom was like 98 points. Yeah, I mean, you can't get much better than that. Right.

I've had therapists tell me, too, the truth is that you just need one you truly just need one person who loves you and believes in you and cares about you and if you got one you're good yep still waiting bro um all right could be me it could be you maybe we'll see how you answer this question okay your first time here i had mentioned to you before we recorded, advice you'd give to your 16-year-old self. So I'm curious because 15 is a pivotal moment for you with your dad, at least for the first chunk. You stopped talking at 15, right? Yeah. 15 to 26 and your dad leaves.

Yeah. What advice would you give 16-year-old Chad Daniels? chad daniels um i would say for everything every time you have one of those thoughts where it's like oh fucking life sucks you gotta immediately find two things that make you happy fuck yeah that way at the end of the day you're always always plus yeah that's great man nobody's ever said anything like that do you Have you trained yourself that? When you think something negative, you try to positive hit two more? Yeah. So when I got divorced, I went through some therapy and I was out in the woods and I told my therapist, local guy, I was like, I saw a deer today out in the woods.

And he's like, yeah, that's where they live. But I've never seen one. And he goes, this time. Wait, growing up in Minnesota? No, I'd always seen them. Okay go, well, I've never seen one. And he goes, this time. Wait, growing up in Minnesota? Oh, no, I'd always seen them. Okay. But not on this particular walk. Gotcha.

And so, because I'd walk every day just to gather my thoughts. And then he goes, you know what? This time, there's a thing called a Seton Watch, where named after a guy that invented it, Seton. You sit down and then after 50, and you very still, and after 15 minutes, look around and nature has come back after the noise and so i start looking around and i bet you i saw 20 deer that day no shit and i and he so he was like it's it's what you look for it's the stuff that you look

for that you're going to see so that includes the negative shit too if you're always looking for problems you're gonna find and you your program in your mind is a computer. What program do you want to run in your computer? So I tell my kids, always look for that. And then I tell my kids, don't borrow worry from around the bend. It's like if you're going to spend three days worrying about that shit, why not just wait until it happens? Then you've at least had three extra days of not worrying.

If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. Dude, thank you for doing this. Thanks for having me. This is fun. Great episode, dude. This is fun. Promote everything one more time, please. Plug it all.

Okay. Dad, if you're out there, you know where to find me, that Chad Daniels on socials, chaddaniells.com slash tour. I mean, there's a bunch of stuff. Just go to chaddaniells.com. there's a bunch of stuff. Just go to chaddaniels.com. There's a bunch of stuff on there and I have a special coming out. It's a mixed reviews. It's already on YouTube. I did two specials in one night. Uh, this one is the first one out. Next one will be out pretty soon. So pretty excited about that. Cause I did

each of them is one take and it's just pretty much as it was. So I left. I almost have a stroke on stage trying to remember a flight from where I was going, and I couldn't remember it, and I said the wrong thing, and it ended up being towns 40 minutes apart driving, so you'd never take a flight. And then I just had a meltdown on stage, and I just left it on. And you left it. Yeah, so I think it's very fun.

Great. Good for you, man. Thank you again. Thanks. As always, Ryan Sickler on all social media. RyanSickler.com. We'll talk to you all next week. Thank you.