The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Chris Duffin - Kabuki

Episode Date: May 3, 2021

My HoneyDew this week is Chris Duffin! Chris Highlights Lowlights about growing up homeless in the woods of the Pacific Northwest! The shit this dude has seen! We talk everything from murder, exposing a child sex ring that involved prominent figures in the police department, and raising his two sisters on his own. Chris not only has incredible inner strength, his physical strength is record setting! Chris is the only person on earth to squat and deadlift 1000+ lbs for multiple repetitions and holds the Guiness Record for that feat! SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://www.youtube.com/rsickler SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! What’s your story? https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew SPONSORS: RAYCON Raycon’s offering 15% off all their products for my listeners and here’s what you’ve gottado to get it: go to BUYRAYCON.COM/HONEYDEW. There you’ll get 15% off your entire Raycon order, and it’s such a good deal,you’ll want to grab a pair and a spare! SKILLSHARE Explore your creativity at Skillshare.com/HONEYDEW and get a free trial of Premium Membership.That’s Skillshare.com/HONEYDEW.

This episode of The Honeydew is brought to you by Skillshare and Raycon. More on that later. Let's get into the do. The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler. Welcome back to The Honeydew, y'all. We're over here doing it in the Nightpan Studios. I'm Ryan Sickler. You can follow me on social media, Ryan Sickler, ryansickler.com. to the honeydew y'all we're over here doing it in the night pan studios i'm ryan sickler you can follow me on social media ryan sickler ryan sickler.com uh please subscribe to the youtube

i see how many of you are watching uh the community has grown like like i said i don't know when these episodes will air but within a year we've built it to like a hundred thousand and i don't know what other people are out there doing that might not be shit I really don't know but I fucking think it's pretty good so thank you for your support I love to see the community going the guests the stories are just fantastic and the Patreon if you

want another episode a week go subscribe to the Patreon it's five bucks a month if you sign up for your year you get a month free and again I don't know when this is going to air because we're recording ahead because Ash is moving to Austin like everybody else. Beginning May 1st, you're going to get the Honeydew for

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And, again, I know that's a lot of money for some people right now, especially after what we're all going through. And if you have it, hey, I'd love to have you. And you do not need to be a Patreon member to submit your story. All right. You guys know I record here at the Santa Monica Music Center. We're working with Outreach of the Arts right now, teaching the kids how to podcast.

They got a great show we're still working on here now, and very excited to bring that to you, as I am very excited to bring this guest to you today. All right. You guys know what we do here. We highlight the lowlights. These are the stories behind the storytellers. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the honeydew for the first time, Chris Duffin, ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the honeydew

for the first time chris duffin y'all welcome to the honeydew my man thank you man i'm i'm really looking forward to some conversation i love i love that you're here i appreciate you reaching out um before we begin anything please plug promote everything you have do it up everything this is chris duffin time whatever you want you want. I'm not big at plugging things. If you follow the stories and you want to check stuff out, it's pretty easy. Just go to my personal website, Chris Duffin. It's like muffin, but with a D.

Really simple. Or ChristopherDuffin.com. If you're listening to this on some device, you type that thing in the little Google window or whatever, my name will pop up. If you get on social media, you type in Chris Duffin. You don't need to remember any avatar or whatever the things are.

I'll pop up. I got the little blue check thing there next to me. So follow along. I do stuff around, well, improving mostly in the physical realm, but we're going to talk mental stuff today because I do a lot on that. But everything that I do is I sell the best biomechanically sound barbells and products in the world at Kabuki Strength. That's K-A-B-U-I – K-A-B-U-K-I strength.com. Coaching and education. We work with 90 percent of professional sports teams in North America.

Is that right? We're working with – we work with – The Ravens? I don't know all the teams. I'm terrible. Orioles? Bomb Orioles? Yeah.

Do you? Yep. You should just say yeah even if you don't make me feel good. Well, Major League Baseball. They need some motherfucking help. We work with – Help them out, please. There's 30 teams.

We work with 29 of them, for example. So when I say 90%, I mean like it's – any major college you listen to, big Marvel Studios actors for the current movie, all the actors for Black Adam and Dwayne Johnson uses our stuff. Yeah, I mean you're solid. Your starting line for the Lakers. Everyone. And I love the shirt. The best of the best. I love the whiskey and bed lifts. We could talk about that. Everyone. And I love the shirt. The best of the best. I love the whiskey and bed lifts.

We could talk about that. Yeah. And barefoot athletics. So best and minimalist shoe as far as improving foot mechanics around. That's bare – B-E-A-R. And you'll understand why the reference to bears for barefoot once we get into these stories. I want to check those out. And then, yeah, if you lift weights and use supplements, build fast formula.

That's what I that's my mind as well. So kind of all over the place. Yeah. Everything that I do and believe in, I bring to life. All right. I love that, dude. I love that. And I love what you said, too.

We're here to talk about mental health today with you specifically because you emailed your list. I ask people to put their trauma in a list, and it just hits different when you emailed your list. I ask people to put their trauma in a list, and it just hits different when you list your trauma. If you've never done it before where you write it out and you're like, oh, my God, oh, my God, I've been through some shit, you know. But you have quite a story. So let me ask you. There is a best-selling book.

Yeah, I was going to say. Best-selling autobiography, The Eagle and the Dragon. I actually read the audio version too, so it's unavailable on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Audible, all that sort of stuff. Link through my website as well. And you can get a free audio download through my website. Oh, that's great. That's really cool. All right.

So where are you originally from? That's a tough one to pin down. All over the wilderness of Northern California and Eastern Oregon. Okay, so you're a wilderness family. Wilderness, wilderness, yes, yes. Like you said, you mentioned something at six, so just take me there. Like, do you have brothers and sisters? I got three sisters and a brother.

And you guys were all out in the wilderness? Yes. With both parents? Yes. Tell me about that. Well, just six years old. There's a meadow, a little stream running through it in the mountains. No roads into this.

And next to that little stream, that's our campsite. We've got beams lashed up into the trees. And when you say campsite, what are you living in, a tent? The beams lashed into the trees. And when you say campsite, what are you living in, tent? The beams lashed into the trees. There are beddings up there because there's rattlesnakes. Like tree fort we're talking about? Yes, tree forts. Wait, you lived in a tree?

Yes, I lived in a tree fort. Usually it was tents or, you know, a condemned home or something of that nature. But at this time, it was tree forts. This is Northern California. This is up in the Trinity Wilderness just off of Humboldt County. I've been up there. Yeah. In the 80s, it was pretty wild territory.

People running around with machine guns and things like that out there because the weed growing. Yeah, I've seen Murder Mountain. Yeah. Yeah. So that's where we lived because that's what my parents did in a manner of trying to make money. So they grew. Also – yes.

But it was bigger just more of not wanting to be part of society. So six years old, I'm sitting there and I've got a live rattlesnake in my hand, right? And it's – That's a hell of a sentence. I'm holding its head, you know, pinched right behind the jaws. How big? It was wrapped all the way down around my forearm, which is like silky smooth. It's just this coldness. I've had one on my neck.

Not a rattlesnake, but a black snake. Fuck that. Wait, you're six and you're squeezing it where the mouth is open? Yes, because you have to keep the mouth open and controlled. And it's sitting there. In order to do what? What is the point of this? To overcome fear for most folks, right?

Fuck that. I'm not fucking kidding you. Who's teaching you this lesson? This is your dad or your mom? My stepfather. Oh, your stepfather. Okay, okay. It sounds like some stepfather.

I won, so I can say it. It's sitting there. It's got those snake eyes, like a real thing, staring you in the eye. It's also a rattle thing. It's sitting there hissing it, and you know. Is that fucking going on your arm? No, not when it's like that. So that's when they're coiled in the bush, ready to strike.

And so but that's what I'm learning how to manage, because if I'm out walking around and doing this stuff, why am I walking around the home? Right. Which is the wilderness. And there's rattlesnake dens around the kitchen. It's right over here, right by the Redwood, right there in the kitchen. My mom's pregnant at the time with my second sister. And there's a time that a rattlesnake was sitting there poised and ready to strike behind her in a bush while we're sitting there. Come on. I'm not joking you. And my stepfather is having to warn her, but make sure he, like striking the snake at the same time.

I got anxiety hearing that. I don't like snakes. I got a good – so anyway, it's – Yeah, tell me about this. I had to learn how to be able to manage those because they're going to be around. And so you – So you went that – you picked it up? No.

What you do is you have a – you always walk with a stick with a Y in the end. So it's cut by a Y. I mean like about the length of your finger V'd at the end. And so what you do is you have to – once they're coiled, you got to understand that they can strike about two times as far as what they look like. I've learned that. Yeah. So you tease it.

It will come out and strike. And then you catch that right over the head, right behind the head, right? What are you talking about? And then you're holding it down. Then you're holding it down. You reach, right behind the head, right? What are you talking about? And then you're holding it down. Then you're holding it down. You reach down. You grab it, right? But that Y has got to be small enough, too, to pin it against the ground.

Yeah, man. There's a lot of mistakes you can make here. A lot of mistakes. And then you can grab it safely, right? And then you have to know where to cut the head off, too, because we're going to eat it. Right. We're going to skin it because we're going to sell the we don't have any money so they were attempting to grow weed and do

another stuff but we we had no money like we had nothing otherwise we probably have a home to live in and they would drive to the right right so so you're going to sell the the skin sell the skin you're going to eat the snake yeah i've had rattlesnake but you got to cut it you know right behind you got to know where the venom sacks, which are in the neck behind the head. But it was a lesson learned of how to actually be safe. But at the same time, mentally learning. By doing the most dangerous shit you can. For the most part.

Well, it's the environment I lived in. Now, here's a funny story about my mom being pregnant. My mom is a tough cookie. I've learned so much from her. I just have to say, only white people would do this shit. Black people, if there's ghosts or snakes, they're fucking like, we're moving, man. We are not fucking moving. They're like, nah, nah, nah.

So my mom goes in, though she's going into labor. And so she has to hike out to the dirt road and wait for somebody to drive along. The first person to come along for some reason was a dump truck. Wait, she has to hitchhike because this is what year? 1980. 1982. And how many kids already are there? Three.

So dad's now back with the three kids at home, and mom has to walk. No, I'm probably watching. So I grew up watching, taking care of the family. But you're six. Yeah. But I hear you. But you're six. Well, you're over there handling rattlesnakes, so you know what?

You're already 14. I had no childhood. You jumped a lot of years that day, bro. So mom walks to the road to Th thumb it to get taken in town to a hospital yes and how far is that and that's so long ago i don't remember but and you're letting your wife get into the first fucking car that could be a lunatic yeah yeah but a dump truck rolls by jump bike truck and he picks her up he picks her up. He picks her up, except— Do you guys see this?

No. This is her— It's probably, like, at least a mile, you know, away. Right? So— I can't even right now. So, apparently—I don't know why. There was two people in a truck.

There wasn't room for her. So she has to climb in the bed of the dump truck. Get the fuck out of here! And they drive to here, Chris! They drive to town, which is probably 45 minutes, an hour down into society, and they drive up to the hospital,

and my mom climbs out of the bed of the dump truck, goes in the hospital, and delivers her sister. Dump me! Just pull it and dump me! I'll slide out of the back! They delivered your mom to the hospital in a dump truck. Yes, in the back of a dump truck. Yes. That's insane.

Your mom is a soldier, bro. Oh, you have no idea. Well, when we get into the nasty stories later, you'll realize just how much of a tough cookie she is. you'll realize just how much of a tough cookie she is. And when I tell the stories about my upbringing, my people are like, oh, your family must be not that bright or mountain folk or white trash or all this sort of stuff. And we look the part. I mean, we go into town and clothes are dirty, high water pants,

knees sticking through, not as a fashion statement. I went to school like that. Like Ash over there with the torn out jeans. He pays for those holes, though. No, no, no. We were the original when it wasn't cool to have torn out jeans. I'm getting those when he's done with them, yeah. And, yeah, people – this is a question I want to ask you about your mom and your dad's relationship for a minute.

Are they on the same page or are they fighting? relationship for a minute are they on the same page or are they fighting like i feel like if you're gonna make a wilderness family work you better be on the same fucking page my mom was in control so she always had men that were gonna do what she wanted and i don't know how she did that but she's i think what she did i think that's what she did that okay i think we know so uh she was she was uh she was she was going to school to be a chemical engineer, had a scholarship, was top of her classes. She was a – Before she had her first kid? Yeah, before me.

I was the first. Oh, you're first. Yeah. And actually she was still going to school with me and then she had some – we're not going to get into her life. But she had some really rough trauma in her childhood. Some really bad shit happened. And authority, not her deal. And she basically decided that she did not want to live as part of society. And so she still lives in kind of the environment that we're talking about.

Oh, wow. Okay. What does she live in though for real? Cabin or – She's got a mobile home. Mobile home. In a town of about 100 people in a county. I think there's 800 people total in the county.

No shit. Out in the desert. And she's a miner. She's got – she does rocks and things like that and doesn't like being around people. Yeah. And lives – she's lived her life 100 percent on her terms. and lives – she's lived her life 100 percent on her terms. And so this was the early of trying to figure out how to make a living in being – not a living,

but just the lifestyle, the being outside of what we're used to, and she did that. And in essence, when we get to it, I've kind of ended up doing the thing, but within society. I was going to say you're not that person. So I forgot where I was going with that. You're back to your rattlesnakes. Your mom's dump trucked. She has a baby. She comes back. Oh, yeah.

So I was just saying. This is child number four, correct? It was a choice, yeah. Yes, it's a choice. Your parents, I was asking if they're on the same page but you're like your mom's running the show my mom was running the show he was along for the ride and uh yeah so that's up on that dump truck your mom your mom rolled solo yeah yeah so but so what happens then where do you How long are you there before and are you being – I mean I don't even want to use the term homeschool. You don't even really have a fucking home.

Are you being tree fort schooled? Like how are you being educated? I went to school. So usually summertime we were 100 percent in the mountains. Got it. And then that's where I said it may be a condemned home. It may be a home without running water or electricity or something like that. Or sometimes it was through the winter or through the school year, we would go closer to town and I would be enrolled in school and my kids, sisters were enrolled in

school later, you know? And so that's where, you know, kind of rough upbringing for me, just like, I did not relate to people very well. wanted to ask you like did it ever because this is this is what's crazy about trauma and in our lives like the weirdness and all that shit when you're it's normal to you it's what you know you don't know a fucking thing but what happens when you get to school do you have do you spend the night at friends homes uh do they ever ask to come to yours like what is that sort of like? Definitely didn't have friends at my place. And actually, I've got a really, really sad story about that that was really early on that kind of shut a lot of that down for me. This was in a very remote town in in called High and Palm out in Northern California,

again, out in the Trinity. Like, you get to an hour, you get to a town of 5,000 people. And then another hour you get to this little town that's got a one-room schoolhouse and a little general store. And I had a friend. And this was first grade. And I started staying the night at his house because it was nice. That's what I'm saying. That's got to be a castle. It was amazing.

Yeah. So I ended up staying the night – every night at his house for like a week, right? And I asked my parents like, hey, I want to stay the night at his house again. They're like, no, you can't because you're imposing on them. You're – we don't – my parents never wanted to ask for charity or ask for help or do – like we didn't – they were very – Proud. We're on our own very proud and we got in a fight like i threw a tantrum it was when your fight was not really a

the correct term when you're in first grade right and i remember that i was throwing a tantrum i went home i was you know cried in my room i was all upset and that next morning I found out the house burnt down and the entire family died in it. No. Yeah. I didn't speak for a year. Are you for real? Yeah. From like what, age six to seven, somewhere in there?

You didn't speak for a year? Yeah. What? Oh, man, you got so many stories. All right, let's talk about that for a moment. How do you come out of that? It's tough. I don't really –

You don't even speak with your family, your parents? So – well, here's the thing though. At the end of the year, we're up in the mountains again and there's been a couple interactions with some police officers. So they come out. They're based way far away and there's this police officer and he – people are known for like kind of disappearing around the guy, right? And they would be out in these remote communities and yeah, people like – there's stories running like, uh, uh, used, there used to be a mill and there were some homes for people that worked the mill and they were really torn down and that's where we lived. Right. It was this little string of, uh, I don't know what you call, but rundown shacks.

And, and he comes up to, uh, to the door and knocks on the door and mom's open it. And there's a pile of weed on the table. And he's like, I'm arresting you, taking you in. And she knows the stories and she says, Chris, you got to run and find Pat, my stepfather. And so I take off and I find him partying down the road a half mile away or so ago. And I'm like, hey, you need to come back. And mom says, bring people. So they come back and they watch and everybody's dead. Just one cop? Just – there's two cops.

Two. Okay. And they just observe because that's all she wanted to know was make sure people knew that she was being taken into custody. And so for some reason, they got pissed about that. So they end up not even just taking her to the jail in that county. They went to the county over. It was even further away because they knew it would be hard for us to get to her because vehicles and things like that is a challenge. You got to find somebody to get a car so you can go there. And it's hours away through – Oh, it's hours.

Yeah. We're out in the Trinity Alps. It's like this mountain range. Like everywhere you go is these big windy roads. Like it's remote. And that plays really important into the story. So that was during the school year. And then that summer we're up in the mountains and we're camped out.

I'm – it was like in the morning. Is she still in jail at this time? No, she's out now. So she – it took a few days. Right. Got her out and we're up there. So it's – mom and Pat are still around. It's in the morning and we see – we're set up.

Our camp is set up. So we can see the big – the road coming up the mountain from miles in advance and we see a bunch of police cars coming up. And mom is like, Chris, you've got to watch the kids. She takes off. Pat takes off. Right? So she's out killing her local growth site, which is just their actual – their supply. And I don't know what Pat's doing because the commercial growth sites are a long ways away.

And police show up and they take all of his kids into custody. So I just want to understand. There's four children just sitting there when the cops show up and they take uh all those kids into custody so i just want to understand there's four children just sitting there when the cops show up you being the five at this point five and you being the oldest and it's just like where are your parents you're like man just us right here hanging out yeah yeah where did you i gotta ask where did you guys go to the bathroom what just outside is that all you did yeah i mean You dig a hole. Yeah, you dig a hole. You bury it. Where did you shower?

So the best way to shower is you take gallon jugs to the stream and you fill them up. And then you go out and you find a sunny spot on a rock and you set them out there. And I did this all the way up through high school. You set them out on a rock during the sun. To warm up. And they warm up. And at the end of the day, you dump them over your head. No.

I love you, dude. Through high school, you did that. That's what I'm saying. I hear shit like this. I'm like, what did I do? We were in Oregon, and it was – we definitely didn't camp. I mean we'd live in trailers through the winter. We had a 16-foot trailer, family that size in a 16-foot trailer, which I don't know.

That's the size of this room. Yeah, it's nothing. This is 10 by 10. This is your spot and you sit there and that's it. And then you roll it out and then you sleep. You don't even move. So I would be wandering around. But anyway, you would heat the water on the wood stove and step out the back door in the snow and dump it over your head to bathe.

Like that's – this is the way I live. That's amazing. I'm sorry. I took you down off on a tangent. But this story – The police show up. This is a really critical story. Your mom's cutting the personal stash.

We don't know where the fuck Pat is and they take the five kids. They take my sisters. My brother. They're all just in the back of the car. What's the youngest? She's nine months. Months months you got an infant yeah okay and so i might get emotional in this part of the story just the way it goes i'm getting emotional and uh so yeah it was a little weird experience i still reflect on it today because we're in the car and my sisters are bawling in the back and i'm just sitting in the front and my sisters are bawling in the back.

And I'm just sitting in the front with no emotion whatsoever. And I'm like inwardly going, what's wrong with me? Why am I – why am I – and I'm just a kid. Like I'm second grade. Yeah, I think I was second grade at the time. And I'm like why am I not responding to this situation? I'm sitting here asking the police officer about his – this is my inner dialogue – about his radio stuff and other things in the car because it was fascinating to me because I hadn't seen anything like that. You know?

Yeah. And – but we end up getting taken and put in foster care. My mom gets – they catch my mom. They throw her in jail. Oh, shit. taken and put in foster care. My mom gets, they, they catch my mom, they throw her in jail. Oh shit. And my mom is in jail for, you know, a few months. I don't remember what the charges exactly were. And she has a dream and she's like, there's something funny about this cop. And there's something funny about this cop who's not the sheriff, what people disappear around him and the way the child protective services and like the things that she's seen.

She's like – something is clicking. She's like, this is not good. And she contacted the DA and told them the story and he is like, I believe you. And they investigated so hold on so this now sheriff has a past history of people disappearing around him yeah and you said you mentioned the child protective services the they're somehow involved with him or he's well that's where they take us and then they move and then this happens with other people because they this happened you know they're helping these they They take these marijuana farmers. They're taking these –

They take their children. These people in the remote areas that nobody cares about because they're trash, right? Right. Who's going to care about those? To these bigger cities far away and put them in these areas. And are all of you children, you and your siblings, are you guys all together in this one place? They separated. They separated.

How many – everyone in a different place? My sisters were all together in this one place? They separated. They separated. How many? Everyone in a different place? My sisters were all together with the same person. Okay. Because it was a human trafficking ring. Ugh. The cops are in on this shit? Yes. How's your mom fucking put that together?

I don't know. But this is real deal. This was in national news. I mean, please please tell me everything. They caught the man that had my sisters as he was boarding a plane to leave the country. He was trying to take them out. Sorry, I'm getting a little – no. He was trying to escape once they – he was running.

But they were prepping to sell him. Tell me to what, to who? Do you guys know where that – I don't know. So the sheriff went to prison. He did? And a number of the police officers and this person, his name was Jamie Bodisson. I do remember that.

My memory around these times are really tough. That's the guy that was running? That was the guy that had my sisters. Sisters. Okay. So your sisters were placed with this man? Yeah. Which already is fucked up.

Well, it was a family. Sure. But yeah. And they had done – We're just going to leave the story here and move on. Okay. But yeah. But you – so you and your brother were together then?

My brother actually ended up – he had a different and uh he ended up uh being uh taken by them and that's a really that's a really rough story too um they will touch on it later sure so uh he's up in the mountains right now just out of prison uh i think he's got a generator got some water from a oh and he's still there he's still there he's still doing in the same area still doing the same thing just living um he's got a lot of shit to deal with and i'm trying to help him but there's only so much you can do for someone so so they do they then let your mom out of jail yes mom gets out of jail and she's still – they're still working on it. So she can't take us yet because they're like, well, you guys don't even have a home. You don't have – like there's still issues, right?

So my grandparents from Idaho drive down, rush down. I got pictures of us picking us up in the courthouse after all this. And they take us back there. And so we spend the summer with grandparents before parents make a home in Oregon. Your mom's parents? Yes. OK. Well, her mother.

And so they move up to Oregon, her and Pat, my stepfather, my sister's father, and set up a home. Hey, we're going to get out of the drug trade. We can't ever have this opportunity of losing the kids again. And so they were able to get us back. And then we spent about a year being quasi-normal there before, you know, mom's just like, we need to get back to being away from people. And so they moved into the mountains again and picked up kind of mining, logging, things like that, living in tents. And so where the 16-foot trailer came in and –

There are seven of you in there. Well, not my brother though. OK. That's right. He went there. Yeah. So it was down to six. Six of you. Six of us in a 16-foot trailer. Jesus. So I just walk around the –

You'd have to leave to get any prizes. I did. But it's cold. It's Oregon in winter. Like there's a – you know what? We're right off the road. There's a stream running by but it's frozen over. So I'd like ice skate with my shoes up and down the stream into the mountains and back and go hiking.

I'd hike all over the mountains by myself and that's what I did. And then during the summer, I'd help with either logging or mining. So a lot of time just work. Like it's my whole life, like a very physical type stuff. So can I ask you, because we've talked about Pat, what you've said is your stepfather. What do you – did you have a relationship with your biological father? Did you ever get – I did.

You did. I did. So my biological father was, he, oh gosh. He didn't have a job because he was a major bipolar depressive, runs in the family. So his mother shot her head off with a shotgun. His brother jumped out of a building here in LA. Oh my God. It goes all the way back back so I don't have a family on that side he attempted suicide I think about 7 times I watched one of them what do you mean? he poured himself with gasoline

and stood there with a lighter threatening to kill himself I'm not laughing at that I just can't believe the shit you are telling me. Not that I don't believe. I think you're lying. I am just in disbelief. But he stood in front of you and covered himself with poured gas and then threatened to do it or did try to do it?

Yep. And then he ended up – he told me to call someone, which was his AA person, and they came and got him. And I was – Man, he waited until the last second to make that call. I didn't tell my mom because I knew I wouldn't be allowed to see him anymore. So I went and stayed with some of his friends for the rest of the week or two weeks during the summer that I'd go see him with some family. I didn't know who it was, but I couldn't like let that happen.

But yeah, he was an interesting man. He was – he spent like three years in Tibet up in the monasteries. Very spiritual. Got me into meditation at an early age. We'd all see these spiritual people and I learned a lot from him but he just wasn't capable. That's why he was OK with my mom taking me. He knew he couldn't manage being a father and raising me. OK.

And also my mom said that she'd freaking kill him i read it in a letter uh yeah i found that in a letter too uh when he after he passed i was reading through my stuff i'm like that's my fucking mom right there and she's she's hard as fuck she's like this is the way it is i I love you. I've always loved you. Don't fucking try to – this is what she wrote him from prison or from jail when I wasn't – so that's why he didn't come and take me because she's like, you're not taking my son. You know what will happen. So – From prison she had that power. Yeah.

Yeah, that's power. So – So you said your dad passed? He passed. Yeah. So you said your dad passed? He passed. Yeah. So we had an interesting – he dealt with alcohol his whole life. I mean I remember I'd just jump on a bus and go down and see him, figure out my way to route.

Like I can't believe I'd do this. Like fourth, fifth grade, I would be like, hey, mom, I'm going to go see my dad for the summer. She's like, you talked to him, right? And I'm like, oh, yeah. And I'm going. I sent him a letter like a month ago saying I was gonna come see him she's like okay um and i'd get a 14 a greyhound bus ticket down to uh san francisco and i'd figure out the bus route from san francisco up to santa rosa and show up at his place like what the fuck am i doing like i reflect back i'm like but there was one time i showed up in san francisco and i couldn't

remember the route to get to his house. So I tried calling him and the phone kept buzzing. So I'm stuck in San Francisco Greyhound Station for like a day trying to talk to the operators because it's going – break the call with my dad. And they're like, we can't do that. And I'm like, hey, come on. I'm like a 12-year-old kid here in San Francisco. I'm freaking out. And so like we'll break the line. Turns out he he

was drunk and melted the phone line together uh and uh he melted yeah so it read it read as busy and uh but they could get through and so he like you know he's all worried so he paid for a taxi from san francisco to santa rosa for me which was hundreds of dollars at the time that was a lot of money back then hell yeah there's another time i show up and I'm like, he's like, I got to walk down to get you. And I can see him coming from long ways away. And he's got piss lines upon piss lines on his sweater and his shirt because he'd been in bed for two weeks and hadn't got out. No way. And he'd just been pissing himself because that required getting up. And yeah, so it was So it was an interesting relationship but he passed and it was a really crazy experience. Were you – any chance you were there? Did you get, I was working as a professional and it was Friday. It was Friday afternoon, the last day before Christmas shut down for the manufacturing facility.

I'm in the gym. I'm in the gym locker room just post-workout, sitting on the bench, getting ready to put my clothes on and figure out – hanging out with friends and stuff like that over the next couple of weeks and what I was going to do. Phone rings on the bench and it's a sheriff. He's like, hey, this is the sheriff for Mendocino County. Your father passed away. It's been a couple of weeks ago, but we've had trouble finding you and you're the only family member. We need you to come down here and take care of his facts.

You're his only family member left? Yes. Oh. And so anyway, I go down and I take care of everything, get him cremated. And he's living in a housing complex for people and I just put all his stuff out in the middle so that people could take all his books. So he was – my whole family is avid readers. That's all we ever do is read. My mom, my stepfather, everything.

We didn't have TV. We didn't have radio. The library was – I mean we would just get stacks of books. We're so – like that's – my family is like – we may have been a white trash mountain folk. You were well-versed. We were well-read. Yeah, that was what we did. Let's take a quick break and tell you about our first sponsor, Skillshare.

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Buyraycon.com slash honeydew. Now let's get back to the do. So a year later, I'm sitting in the same gym Friday before Christmas break. Last day of work, the finished up my workout, sitting on the bench, the cell phone rings. Finished up my workout, sitting on the bench, and the cell phone rings. Pick it up. Hey, this is the sheriff for Deschutes County. Your stepfather's passed away.

We know that you're not the biological son, but what we understand is you're the one in the family that takes care of things. You need to come over here and do that. And it's the same, like, time, everything. Fucking day. How many years later? One year one one year not the same exact day of the month but the same time frame the same like in my world the same thing it's friday right before like all i'm sitting in the same spot same bench just finished my workout fucking right there and i get the fuck out of that locker room so so uh that's the last time that was the last time I – yeah.

That was the last time I did anything. I quit that job and decided I was going to take a year off actually right after that. I'd be scared to piss in that bathroom. So we drive over. My sisters actually end up – they stepped up and took care of everything, which is interesting by the way. I raised my three sisters even. We'll talk. So they're like, brother, you've been taking care

of us. We got this. And so they took, uh, they took care of everything, but this is what struck home for me. And this has had a huge effect on my life. They left with nothing. The only people that they had, my stepfather had his daughters. They were the world to him. My father had me. It was the same. It was everything. It's the only thing he had.

And I've told some stories that may paint them in a bad light, but there's lots of positive things as well. And you've got to look at those things and but the only thing that they left still was just mixed emotion a mixed bag of like wow i don't know there's so much positive and negative and all this um i i no mark on the world other than that. And that mark was a mixed, a mixed bag. And, uh, that resonated with you.

It resonated with me. Why? You didn't want to be like, I didn't want to be like that. I want to, I knew I wanted to leave this world a better place. And I wanted the people that I've been around and touched in my life to know I was fucking there. That's all.

I say it all the time. All you have to do is be there. That's it. Show genuine interest and just be there. None of the other shit matters. You guys, you're living in tree forts, for Christ's sake. You're living in tree forts, for Christ's sake. You're living in fucking tree forts. You got other kids with these palatial mansions, and they're crying because they don't get to drive fucking six-figure SUVs and bullshit. Like, come on, man.

All you really need is to be there. I get frustrated sometimes when people talk about being poor, and it's like, look around. You've got the gaming center. You've got your fancy phone. You've got nice clothes. Like, you're not fucking poor. I'm center. You've got your fancy phone. You've got nice clothes. You're not fucking poor. I'm sorry. You're not.

You're not. Yeah, you're not. And I'm like, it may be a struggle. You may have some challenge and anxiety. I don't want to – but also at the same time, be thankful for what you had because I was thankful for what I had when I grew up. And I can tell you all the lessons that I learned about it to make me a better person in this world today. So what I want to ask you is after hearing all these stories growing up in literally the world – go ahead, please.

Let me tell you just two more tidbits. So this is a funny story. Well, OK. It's a dark story. But – You mean it's compared to the light ones you shared. So it's Thanksgiving. This is high school.

We actually had – so in high school, I finally had a stable, like a mobile home that we lived in. And it didn't have – it had running water. It had electricity. The doors were curtains. Are you using kerosene heaters inside? We used to use kerosene heaters all the time. No, it was electric heat. So the little baseboard heaters and

they wouldn't keep up. So like you'd figure out the oven would be open. You'd fill the bathtub with hot water so that the heat would be pulling the heat from the water heater too. And, but cause the windows were crank closed, but they wouldn't close. So you're covering them with plastic and things like that. And we had to do-by-four framed kitchen to put a sink in so we'd have a counter and stuff because there was no kitchen in the place. But it was fucking stable for four years. I was in high school and it worked great. But we just still struggled.

So one Thanksgiving, it's getting tight and like maybe it was like eight weeks before Thanksgiving. We'd end up getting these pet rabbits because they were free on the nickel ads. So Pat runs over, gets these pet rabbits, and we – each of my sisters gets one. I got a feeling one of them ain't going to make it. And there might have been some foreboding because they were named breakfast, lunch, and dinner. No, come on. And so there are my sister's babies for like six, eight weeks.

And Thanksgiving rolls around on Pat Coase. And he's like, Chris, we don't got a turkey this year. Can't afford one. Let's go out back. It's Thanksgiving morning. We go out there, twist the heads of the bunnies. All three? All of them. is that how you do

it i don't even know how you kill around uh yeah hold it between it is one of the ways that's the way patterned it wasn't necessarily the best about some things like this so um uh i i was just talking to my mom the other day and she was like i was talking i was talking about this like little this lamb we or the sheep we found and like he mom was like, yeah, I had to finish that. But he tried it with a baseball bat or something. Jesus Christ. Porcupine killing is an interesting thing too because we ate all sorts of shit. You ate porcupine?

Oh, yeah. What is that? We ate all kinds of mushrooms. Is that tough? You've got to skin it right away, but it's a little tough. It's a red meat, but you've got to get that hide off of it right away but man they got a thick thick skull it's uh uh he's out there that's how you do it because you could shoot them with a 22 over and over again they still keep moving out of the tree and you gotta hit them and i'm people are gonna hate this podcast they're like you're horrible

oh you're uh highlighting killing animals like no do you understand we had to hate this podcast. They're like, you're horrible. Oh, you're highlighting killing animals. No, do you understand? We had to do this. That was food. We had to do this to live. Tell me. Is that right? That was food. That was food.

You're not eating it. That's what you freaking ate. You're not out there target practicing. Go pick a puff ball down from the stream and slice it up and grill it. So we're sitting at the table because it's all day. My sister's been just bawling, bawling. And they're sitting down and each of them are eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Breakfast is tender.

And my youngest sister, she looks at me. She's like, dinner tastes so good. And she still has the streaks through the dirt running through her face from earlier in the day because they've been all there all day. That's a pretty dark story. That's a dark Thanksgiving. So I'll just sum up the rest of my younger ages in two minutes. So I went off to college. By the way, I was valedictorian.

I was a state-level athlete. Of high school? Yeah. And you're performing athletically and academically yes like that from living in a trailer at this point at least but coming from the wilderness yes and good for you and so i got a full red uh academic scholarship to go to school damn you got an academic scholarship yeah uh pursued a double uh uh double engineering degree couldn't go back home i didn't talk to i didn't call home for a couple years about a year and a half because I got to ask you anytime I call, they'd ask for money.

First time you got your own apartment or something. Yeah, of course they asked for money. Seriously, I was going to school and I'd give them money because I was working full time too. So I got a job. I was working 30 to 40 hours a week in high school. I was working in high school. I was working in high school too evenings and weekends and then in college I worked full time while doing the dual engineering degree bought my first house when I was 21 years old

21? what was it like to fucking buy a house going from what you come from? that's what I want to ask what is that like? it was pretty cool and I needed to because I was raising my sisters I took custody of my three So you took them with you. I took custody of my three sisters.

You took full custody? Yeah. Oh, wow. Okay. And how old were they when you took them in? I didn't take them all at once, so they were – I think Melissa was 13 when Pat kicked her out in the snow because – That's not bad, bro. That's his daughter, right?

That's his daughter, but he thought she stole his favorite cereal bowl. He's going a little crazy by this point. By the way, he's going a little crazy. Mom had left him. She had a mental breakdown and she was out in Montana. And so he had the girls and he was not capable and was on a decline. And so, yeah, he kicked out. The youngest was living with a friend and the second was actually in juvie.

And the oldest, who was 13 at the time, was living with him. And he kicked her out in the snow because he found it later on top of the refrigerator. But anyway. Sorry about that. So I took her first. It was right next to the Lucky Charms, man. I didn't think to look. And then. I know.

There's so much that's happened. They're pretty fucking funny. Like me and my sisters get around. We laugh about this shit all the time. That's all you can do. There's so many little ones that you can't – that are just fucking crazy. Like you're just like, what the fuck is this? So I take custody of her. I take custody of Janice, the middle one, when she gets out of

juvie. And then when Pat died, there was a farce that she was saying the youngest was living with Pat. And so I had to take – that's when I got custody of her because she was – she had a good kind of friend's parent she was living with. but she was going to get taken by the state. So I got her at that time. So I ended up raising all of them through their teenage years from 14-ish through 19 or however long it was to do where they're at. And this job is affording you the financial freedom to do that for the four of you? Well, I lived in Southern Oregon in the small – it was a cheap place.

And so I only had the two at the time. So I had two there and then – yeah, I was working on advancing my career. Apparently, I was – for some reason, this kid that didn't communicate well with people was laughed at, whatever, growing up. It wasn't socialized very well. I presented myself really authentically in the world and like people connected and I didn't know why because I wasn't like this super extroverted, articulate person motivating or anything that I thought like leaders were. But I was doing really well. And so I picked up – I was in southern Oregon in a small town. Portland is the big town in Oregon. So it's on the other side of the state.

And my – the oldest sister by this time was 18, 19. And I said, the house is yours. And I took the middle sister and I moved to Portland and started working on my MBA and took a new job up there. And that's where I took custody of the youngest as well. Damn. So it was all big steps. So then I led this whole executive career doing company turnarounds, running automotive and aerospace companies and fixing them, prepping them for sale, like all sorts of shit. You went from the goddamn tree fort

to aerospace. Yes. I know. That's range, man. It is range. That is fucking range, bro. Yes. And that's where,

like, I don't like to tell, like, my story, yeah, there's some rough stuff, but it was just different. It's different than most people

and I learned a lot from it, but the thing that I have from value is I've had a huge scope of my life that most people haven't seen. Same time, I also lifted a lot of weights and did some other things in that world too. So let me ask you this. Coming again from your upbringing, what's the one thing that you've done in your life with your money that you never would have thought you'd be doing? I'm working on my pilot's license right now. Are you really? Yeah.

That's crazy. Yeah. But I don't know. I don't really live – I really live – I got a – the only brand new vehicle I bought was in 2005. I just like making stuff and doing stuff and creating. I'm not a big... My house is nowhere near what I...

I don't know. I can't say that... Well, it's obvious. I say it all the time. My trauma, your trauma, it wouldn't have felt any better, any different with this palatial mansion with this like mental illness is mental illness mental illness doesn't give a fuck how much money you

have mental illness doesn't give a shit if you're you know a billionaire if you're sick you're sick it doesn't give a shit about class or race or anything you know what is okay the one thing it because again i don't have a lot like i don't have a mansion. I don't have a bunch of fancy cars. I don't have that. That's not my thing. That's also not success. That doesn't mean success. But what I do have is I've got three different companies.

I've got – the largest one has over 50 employees and it's a globally recognized brand and we're doing things in the world to help people live better quality of life, to get people out of pain. And it's crazy. I work in this circle. I work with people that are the largest known public figures, the biggest sports stars in the world, the best clinicians in the world, the best – I have this like network of people that I work with. It is so crazy diverse. It blows my mind when I sit there and I look at who I sit there and text message and podcast like, oh, there's the best physical therapist in the world and that's the best spine biomechanist in the world. And that's arguably the best orthopedic surgeon. And, oh, I just dropped an offer and hopefully – oh, yeah, that was Dwayne Johnson that just read my book. Oh, the starting line for the LA Lakers.

They have my equipment at the Lakers at their trainer's home and at their personal home. Like in 90 plus percent of all sports in professional sports in North America, 600 plus colleges, any big name that you can think of. All the actors for the action movie stars and stuff like that, the sets they're training on, they're using our equipment. That's fucking cool. That's awesome. And the better thing is I get a message almost every day from someone around the globe saying, you changed my life. Gratitude, yeah.

I was in pain. It was messing with my – every aspect of my life it was debilitating i watched some of your videos which are free put it in place i went to the gym i just hit my old squat max for a triple and i'm in zero pain it's the clinician saying i used your methods and i've got this 65 year old grandmother in 30 minutes i got her i want to learn and i had her crying because she knew that she was going to be able to pick up her grandchild that she couldn't pick up wow it was the person that says i've read your book three times i had to give it to my mom it is the our go-to because the impact it's had on us understanding how to live with stress and trauma and look forward in life

and how much you can accomplish. That's fucking cool. That's amazing. It's amazing and good for you. So what was it in your life that made you, because we talked before the show, like what makes you want to give back? Because we talked, some people never even deal with the trauma. Some people work on it forever. Like I'm sure the people in your family who have mental illness tried and maybe

they found another way to relieve their stress. What made you want to turn around and go, hey, I want to help. Not only did I want to help myself and my sisters, like, which is, if that's all you ever did, excuse me, that's amazing. But what made you want to help anyone out there I should say? Well, my prior career, I was doing company turnarounds. To me, my big thing that I just – that I cared about, that I really enjoyed in that was the impact I was having because you do that through changing people. Through getting people to take on more that they think that they personally can accomplish and being able to accomplish it and then the impact that has. And that's how you create this cultural change on an individual level, and that was powerful.

Coach, being a coach, being a mentor, and helping people understand that turning into challenge, turning into the things that scare you can lead to a better quality of life. At the same time, I owned a gym on the side, and I was lead to a better quality of life. At the same time, I owned a gym on the side, and I was training to be the strongest person in the world. And I was coaching people in the evenings for free that showed up to our gym. Anybody, I'd mentor them in the same thing. I'd get more power out of somebody hitting a personal record or getting out of pain or doing something than I did by setting a world record.

Wait, you did set it? Oh, yeah. You did? Yeah. record or getting out of pain or doing something than I did by setting a world record. So I knew – Wait, you did set it? Oh, yeah. You did? Yeah. You were at one point the strongest man in the world? I set the all-time record for the squat on two occasions. I was ranked number one in the world for eight years straight.

And then over the last six years, I trained for something very particular. for something very particular. I am the only person still standing who has both squatted 1,000 pounds and deadlifted 1,000 pounds and done it for reps. Nobody else in the world is. I did it both for three reps. Holy shit.

You squatted 1,000 pounds three times. And I deadlifted 1,000 pounds for three times. So there's specialists. There's people that have done one or the other. There's about five or six people on either side that have done one or the other. There's about five or six people on either side that have done one or the other. No one's close to doing both. This is why I read that. I've done both. You're the only human on earth.

And I did a, the deadlift was a sumo style. It's in the, they only, the records only count for one rep, but I just wanted to leave no doubt in the tank. That's why I did more. It's still standing as the Guinness World Record. Wow. Good for you, man. Anyway, but I love the other part of it more.

And I'm sitting there. My kids are getting a little older. I'm in my hot tub one morning. And kids are waking up. And I'm thinking about them. You know how old they are? My son's about – well, that's how old was this. This is – he's 12 now.

Yeah, so he's about six years old. And my second child, she was three years old and – four. And yeah, four. Six and four. And I'm thinking about them and I'm thinking about them being in the situation I was. I do that shit too. And that's – I start crying. Imagine looking at your six-year-old and being like, Jesus Christ, when I was six, I'm fucking getting taken by the police.

Handling you guys. And I'm old. It didn't strike me as trauma. Exactly. It didn't strike me as trauma. Exactly. It was just life. And then when my kids started, and that's when it was like, oh, fuck. That's when the emotions started coming back. Thank you.

That's when. Yes, thank you. People don't realize that sometimes you're living it. You're dealing with it. You are. It's later when you look back on it and you're like, oh, my God. And for me, it was survival mentality. I was raising, even when I was younger, I was taking care of my sisters and raising my kids.

I had to be there present, even though I'm still dealing with, guess what? I've got the bipolar that runs in my family, my dad's side of the family. I got major fucking issues there. That's part of my life. I had to make sure that that wasn't present. It didn't come to the forefront

when I'm raising my sisters. I had to be there. There was nowhere else to fucking go. And so it just never hit. And then watching my kids as that morning, a hot tub. And I'm like, I got to do something else. I got to do something more in the world. I happened at the time to also be, um, uh, doing clinical continuing education. Uh, that's why I know a lot of the clinicians that times I was just talking about. Cause I, at the time I was getting asked to speak at big events or at the physical therapy or chiropractic colleges on the stuff that I was putting in place in my own training, the gym, the stuff. I was kind of known for that stuff.

Outside of my work environment, I was known as this phenomenal athlete and coach. And I'm like I knew that I could help people beyond just the things that I was doing. And I could take that stuff that I was doing and take it to a whole other level. And I had a great life. I had two homes. I was building a third. I had a massive retirement. I had a house with a white picket fence, two kids, a marriage that was entirely comfortable. And I walked away from all of it.

All of it. All of it. The marriage, the jobs, the house. I was living in an apartment, had my kids half-time, and I was launching Kabuki Strength. Lost my entire retirement, spent three years without a paycheck, running up every credit card I could. Negotiating the situation with the ex-wife because the kids was the highest priority. That was the thing that kept me from doing that earlier. Um, and, uh, and so she's a great woman and, uh, we were able to, to do that

very well. We live five minutes apart. Kids are like, it's, it's as good as it can get. Uh, not a bad words ever said in between, uh, either. And, um, and either. And yeah, that was just a few years ago. But I knew what I wanted to do in the world and where I wanted to go. And I had a driving passion to do it. A driving passion to not just be lost to the wind like Pat and my dad. Right. To leave my freaking mark. Well, you've definitely done that.

And so in five years, I built a globally recognized brand. I found an amazing woman. I found what – discovered what love is and passion. And in the home, I have a third child and the three – my two oldest are just freaking phenomenal with the youngest. She's three years old now. And launched two other companies as well. Wrote a bestselling book, working on my next book, which is actually focused on kind of business and self-improvement specifically.

The first one is an autobiography. And because resilience, resilience of body, mind, and soul are like you have to have all three. And yeah, my work is on the physical side because that's – I'm a professional. I know my shit. My team knows their shit. We're the best at what we do. We make tools that change the game. But the other two can't be forgotten and that's why I do things like this.

That's why I write my books. That's why I do this stuff because we have to have all aspects of this. Resilience. It's freaking, I, I, I use that in place of strength because people think, oh, it's about squatting big weight. No, no. It's about developing resilience so that when the things come at you in life, you're ready for it. You're ready for whatever is going to buffet your way. That every opportunity, the things – life is going to hit you and you can figure out how to – you can't change that. You can't change the trauma.

You can't change the bad shit that's happened to you. And I don't want to negate it, but you can use part of that if you know how to become a stronger version of yourself. Story I've been telling a lot lately is about trees in the biodome. Okay. Share it. I try to set up a special environment

to separate it from the world to see how well it does, right? And they put trees in there. They grow to a certain height and then they just fall over. No roots at all? It doesn't matter what type of tree. It gets to a certain height, falls over. They finally figured out why.

It has no wind. The wind hits it it and it says, you got to be strong. You need to spread these roots thick and strong in the ground. You got to take your bark and make it robust to withstand the weather and do all this resilience. So if you don't do that, you grow and kill yourself. Fragile.

You kill yourself. You're fragile. And so you have to have stress in life too. Too much? Yeah, it can be a dangerous thing. So it's a balance. But we do not live. The process of dying starts when we don't have anything to adapt to. Trying to find that easy life, living in the mansion with no worries or on the beach in the Caribbean is death. If you don't have some stress and challenge, some things that scare you in life to be able to turn into and chase. I love it, dude. We were talking before and I said, you know, you see, especially out here,

and this is men and women putting all this money into their hair or their face or their lips or their bodies or their abs or their ass and won't spend a fucking dime working on who they are it's all about what i look like and they're the same fucking broken fucked up people that they always will be because they'll never put the work in on themselves so i and they but here's the thing they've had the trauma they've had it. Their thing is, if I look a certain way, I'll feel a different way. And that's the truth is you're you're you need to turn back to the time that made you feel that way, made you feel that you had to have those things and talk to that person. That's right.

You do be that friend to that person because I've been that person for me. My job is amazing. People ask me me my job is amazing people ask me what my job is my job is to be me look i'm sitting here you know i'm wearing my shorts i dress up i might put on some sweatpants my hair's a mess i don't freaking like you know what i'm bipolar i'm a adhd and i'm just kind of all over like whatever and this is the way I walk in the world. And that's okay. I got faults aplenty, a lot of them.

And that's fine. That's just fine. Yes. That is just fine. So let me ask you this. I got this video. Go ahead. People should check out.

I got this video called Unkempt. It's on my Instagram. Check it out. It's really, really great. But it's basically talking about because people have been harassing me for like a year about my hair. And I'm just like, this is me. I'm unkempt. I'm also on a lot of things. Check it out. It's a really good poem. All right. I ask all my first guests, um, after everything we've talked about now, what advice you would give to your 16 year old self? self, and I'm curious what you would go back and tell 16-year-old Chris.

Oh, man. I mean, at 16, you've already lived three fucking lifetimes. Yeah, I was definitely an adult at that point in time, and that's part of the problem. I didn't have an opportunity to really sit back and figure out who I was for a long time. And this is a major struggle for me. I had different masks that I had to put on. Kabuki, I mean my company because my nickname for a long time was Kabuki that I had to put on Kabuki. I mean, my company,

cause my nickname for a long time was Kabuki man to put on a mask. People would see me at work and I'd be completely different person than someone else that you might see somewhere else. Cause I thought I had to be that way. And sure I performed well, but that's, that's what I do. I'm a performer. I'll get shit done. And it took a toll on me. It nearly killed me trying to be that and learning to walk that way. So it's introspection and the ability to turn into yourself and the ability to really find what your North Star is, the way that you want to live, really the truly underlying values, not what society tells that you want to be or anything that you can actually ever really have,

but the things that you can move closer to. For me, just to give some depth to this, this is stuff like sense of family or community. It is continual learning. It is challenge and accomplishment. It is having a creative outlet. Those are four big ones. The creativity piece was one that I was really missing in my prior career. But you should end up with like five or seven of these freaking nugget pieces that define who you are.

People – and this is what I did. I tried to chase. I need degrees. I need a career that – money this and like all these things that you try to figure out how to build a solid life. But when you switch gears like I did at almost 40 years old in five years, I was able to create an amazing life that every aspect of what I want to do and the ability to spend four to five more hours a day with my family by cleaning the shit and the fluff out of it because I knew exactly what and how I wanted to live and how I could pull the people into my life

that I wanted that had the same shared stuff. It's transformative what I've accomplished. I was successful as shit in my former career. But compared to what I am now and what I'm able to do based on who I want to be, it's a completely different game. And it's through that process of that inward turn to find those nuggets, to dig deeper, to peel back those layers. And that's what I drive people to do. And this is the process I kind of cover in my drive people to my book because I can't tell you what what you want. You want the mansion and the fancy cars? That's fine. No, go. Why? Why? Why do you want those? Why? If it's a sense of, you know, if it's because I know I want to take care of and have security for my family.

And if I've got those things and I set that as my, you don't know why, but that could be the underlying thing. But if you don't know that, you could over leverage yourself getting those things and get the exact opposite of what you want in life. You could think. Man, say that again. Over leverage yourself and get the exact opposite. Exact opposite because you set your goals on the wrong thing. You set it on the wrong reason. You didn't understand the why.

Right, the why. I want to be an NFL player. And then one random Saturday, your knee gets taken out. Now your life dream's shot. Why did you want to be an NFL player? There's probably a couple dozen other ways that you can realize the same things that you want in life. If you understand why, and this isn't a Sunday afternoon project to try to figure out,

this is an ongoing thing. There'll always be some revision, but once you've got that, then you can move past the setting, the goals, the bucket list, all the other stuff that people go. I need to check the list and figure out what degree and what college I'm going to go to and what career I'm going to get and how much salary I need to have and when do I get married. I need to visit here and I need to have this. I hate fucking bucket lists. You have to know your North Star so you can properly figure out the ways that you can realize that. That's great, dude. Please plug whatever you'd like again.

Oh, I – if people find value in stuff, read my book. ChristopherDuffin.com. ChristopherDuffin.com or ChristopherDuffin.com or ChrisDuffin.com. There's a free audio download or if you've got an audible, you know, whatever, links to it as well. Or you can just find it on Amazon. Signed copies are on Kabuki Strength if anybody wants it. Like I said, body, mind, and soul. So I'm a big believer. You have to have the physical component. That's why I make the products, the education, and have the coaching services that we do at Kabuki Strength. We work with the best of the best.

That's awesome. And there's a reason for that because – yeah. And shoes, foot mechanics is number one global priority in the body. Number two is – or number one is – sorry. Foot mechanics is number two. Number one is ability to manage and control spinal biomechanics as well as breathing. I was going to say back. It's got back. No.

Number one healthcare cost in America. Back. Back pain. Not cancer. Not diabetes. Not heart disease. It's freaking crazy. And guess what?

We all control it. And two of the big things is breathing and how we manage this diaphragm to pelvic floor relationship. We can change that game so fast. The second one beyond that is foot mechanics. And that's why I do shoe designs and have a shoe company. So build fast formula. People are actually really into the performance side of things. You can take the next step up with that sort of stuff.

But number one, you got to eat right. You got to train right. So that's the physical nature of stuff. But don't forget the other two. Thank you so much for coming on and sharing your story. This has been fantastic, man. And congratulations on all your success. I mean, man, I got to get my ass.

He made me feel like shit today, bro. Set my game up. As always, Ryan Sickler on all social media, ryansickler.com. We'll talk to you all next week. you