The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Jeremiah Watkins - Tear Jerker

Episode Date: December 28, 2020

My HoneyDew this week is Jeremiah Watkins! Jeremiah returns to close out the most fucked up year with the most emotional episode I’ve ever had. Jeremiah highlights the lowlights about his engagement and he reads from one of his journals, including an entry about a close friend who took her life. Talking about it took Jeremiah by surprise and I’ll be honest, it took me by surprise too. We went to therapy on this one y’all! I’d like to thank each and every one of you for your support! I appreciate all y’all ESPECIALLY this year! Here’s to a happy, healthy, prosperous 2021! SUBSCRIBE to my YouTube and watch full episodes of The HoneyDew every toozdee! https://www.youtube.com/rsickler SUBSCRIBE to my Patreon show, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I highlight the lowlights with y’all! What’s your story? https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew

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Now, that's all the important stuff out of the way. Let's get to some more important stuff here. If you're new to the show, welcome. Thank you for being here. Hit that subscribe button on YouTube. And if you don't know what we do, we highlight the low lights here. We're over here shining a little bit of light on the darkness, laughing in the face of adversity. These are the stories behind the storytellers. And it's a pleasure to have this storyteller back on the honeydew for the second time y'all please welcome jeremiah walkins everybody welcome back to the honeydew hey how's everybody doing out there good to be here man i love you right you're brian hey this is brian thank you for being back it's good to

be here man thank you i'm so excited i saw you outside and it was like man it is so good to see friends in person you look good you're you're you're keeping it together man i'm trying i'm doing my best well you got a lot going on we're going to talk about here you're about to be a new dad yes um which is i know daunting especially I can't imagine having a baby during a fucking global pandemic, but God bless you for it. I figured it was the right time. It's perfect. The world's going to shit. Let's bring another soul into it.

Yeah. Yeah. Some good ones. Some good ones. Yeah. Some uplifters. But also, if you haven't seen Jeremiah's first episode, go back, check that out. You actually came on talked about uh

skin cancer i did yeah um get your moles checked yeah get your moles in that episode yes for real like no joke about that like yeah i had no idea how serious skin cancer was and it's always works that way because we're in a simulation where you come on and you talk about um skin cancer and then all of a sudden here come all these stories and i see all these articles and everything comes flooding in and i'm like man this shit so i even had a mole i went and got checked good i was like what do you think about this the doctor's like yeah it does look a little weird let's check it out it's all good i had sunglasses on i'm starting to get a little big it was weird it was cool like me wasn't wearing a mask man it's a little mole man

i'm just hanging out back here, man. It's good to be here. So yeah, check out his first episode and before we get into a bunch of new stuff, why don't you go ahead and tell us everything you want to promote. Sure.

We got a new special coming so let's talk about it. Yeah, I have a new special that is out right now on Amazon Prime that you can check it out. You can rent it on there.

Video on demand, Apple TV, Roku, Google Play, all that stuff. And if you're more of an audio person, I've got a hard copy or it's streaming on all platforms, Spotify, iTunes. I've got a great podcast that Ryan has been on a couple times. This is for you, by the way. Oh, this is my copy?

This is your copy, bro. Jeremiah Walken's Family Reunion right here. Yes, sir. Jeremiah Walken's Family Reunion. Who's that lady on the back right there? Is that your mom? That is my sweet mom. Oh, that's nice to hear.

Yeah. I brought her up on stage at one point. See, I like doing things like that. My first TV appearance was I wore my dad's Pan Am work shirt on it. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted him to be a part of it. Yeah.

You feel connected. They've done so much. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, this is mine. Thank you very much you that's all you and then uh you've been on my podcast jeremiah wonders a couple times one of my it's absolutely one of my most favorite shows to go on it's so much goddamn fun to sit there

yeah it's just a fun riff fest it's just being silly and acting out characters everyone that does it i'm they're like i'm like whose podcast you're doing today like oh jerem i'm like goddamn it's so much fun like i had such're like, I had such a good time. I had such a good time. Yeah. Yeah, so thank you for that. Yeah, of course. And then at JeremiahStandUp on social media and JeremiahWatkins.com for tour dates and all that stuff.

And if you want to follow me, I'm a fun follower. I post a lot. Yeah, you do. I'm around. You're around. Yeah. So going back to briefly your first episode here, your upbringing was very religious. Very much so.

Was it Catholic or Christian? It was Protestant Christian. Protestant Christian. So what you would attribute to maybe a little bit more strict than Baptist, like for most people who – or like a non-denominational kind of thing, a little bit more strict than that. It was called Church of God Holiness. Okay. And everyone in the family is a part of this? Yes. Okay. Yeah. So the family is a part of this? Yes.

Okay. Yeah. So you had a strict upbringing then? Very much so. Went to church three times a week. Damn. Yeah. And no wonder you like to act out and cut up.

Like, how hard was it for you? Because that shit's in your – I believe it's in your DNA the moment you are conceived. Oh, yeah. So it's not just later you all of a sudden become this 20 year old kid that looks back and laughs at that you're fucking off like i can tell you and i'll bet you a lot of you out there have been like this some of the hardest times i've ever laughed was trying not to laugh when you're not supposed to oh bro and you see the person next to you shaking you just out of the corner of your eye and it's fucking killing you.

It is killing you and you can't fuck. You're just like... Yeah, so I don't know how you ever got through church. Did you ever fall asleep on fat lady's arms in church? No. No, we weren't allowed to, man. We had a nun in the family. You couldn't... You had to be oomph. You had to go to confession

if you wanted communion. Like, it wasn't just, oh yeah, we're... Because we'd be tired of sitting there i would get up i'd be doing this all the time how long are the masses i mean they last uh the sermons are i mean they go any from like an hour to two hours so no it depends it really depends well i i'd say that because even though you had a strict upbringing you sent me some stories you wanted to talk about. Because it seems like your parents may have been a little doing their own thing, kind of. Well, this was later on. Okay, this was later on.

This was, that's when the divorce happened. They threw everything out the window. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So when they split, they also let God go to, all three of them left. Yeah, yeah. They divorced God, too? We'll see you on them. Yeah, yeah. They divorced God too? We'll see you on the other side, Jesus.

What happened? Basically, they started having marital problems, and I think that they wanted to start living different versions of their lives. I think that, like you just said, when you're supposed to behave, it becomes really hard after a while, and tension builds over and over. And when you're being like— Is that a pepper grinder right there?

Yeah. You put a little spice on that sin. This sin is spicy. Give me some more pepper on my sin. This sin's a little bland. You're getting potent over here. But after you lived like that for a while. Can I ask you a real quick question?

Yeah, of course. Anytime. Who, if one or the other, got the other mom or dad into this religion? Or is that how they met? My dad definitely brought my mom over. Okay. You know what I mean? Like she,

I think she went to church a little bit as a kid. I think she might've gone to like a few, I think she might've been even Catholic as like a little girl. If I remember correctly. She wasn't like super active. Bring your mom, your mom's Darth Vader. She's coming over to the dark side and then going back to the Jedi, standing there with Obi-Wan and her little silhouette at the end.

Yeah, exactly. All right, all right. So your dad brings mom over and they live this religious life. Because my dad's a missionary's kid. So my dad grew up, like, very, very religious. Okay. Wait, hold on one second. What is that, Ash?

Drumming? Like a drum line. Yeah, like a drum line. Yeah, I hear it. Like kids outside? Nick Cannon's doing a meet and greet. What is that? Are you hearing it on the mics?

You've got to hear that on the mics. No, you can't hear that on the mics. Are you sure? Huh? Huh? I said mics are you sure huh i said are you sure these are pretty good mics they are but that's but are they i mean it's fucking good i feel like a blow dart's about to hit me in the back of the neck you can't hear that all right go ahead and pick up if you can you talk over that just somebody just somebody comes in starts busking for money like what are you doing bro second line outside yeah all right go ahead i think we're all right uh so after a while when when you're like i was saying when you're living one way a certain way and you may have been i don't think my mom was

ever forced into it i think that it was like something where i don't and you may have been i don't think my mom was ever forced into it i think that it was like something where i don't know it could have been because she loved my dad and she wanted to to check out what he loved you know and what he was all about and then she grew accustomed to it and then started liking it but she was always the one that i would go up to or i'm like can we push back on this like she was kind of the liaison between me and my dad on like when i would want to do something that would like maybe like buy a rap cd or something like that like i'd have to like hey can i can we talk about that and she's like pick your battles with you know with your dad so uh after they started having marital problems i think that they both kind of had a little bit of midlife crisis like you know like they kind of are

reevaluating everything what did your dad do how old were you when they split i was 17 oh okay you're older i was older yeah i was older but you saw the mar coming. Yeah, you see it for like, it happened like a few years building up to like, we're getting a divorce. It's like, really? We know. Like it's happening. But from Jesus too, you're like, yes. Summer vacation. So they just, so I'd never seen my parents drink.

I'd never seen them do drugs or anything like that. So they just – so I had never seen my parents drink. I had never seen them do drugs or anything like that. And I basically – they would start seeing them come home like with a friend. And it was always like hidden to me kind of like between them. Like for a while I was like, Mom's in a good mood tonight or something. You know what I mean? It didn't really register to me until i looked back on i was like oh she had a little bit of that sin sauce you know what i mean

yeah so uh after a while you know they both kind of started having their issues with it and stuff like that and i started seeing them drink a little bit i don't know if i mentioned last time but i've like later on like my mom would start like smoking weed with my sister and stuff like that really like openly yeah and i even saw them like on shrooms together one time how old was your sister she's a couple years younger than me okay yeah yeah so they so they like started embracing so my brother and sister like they're like this is great you know they saw it as an opportunity like, oh, then I can do that too. And I'm like, but what about all the years that we were told not to do that? And I just ended up going the other way and just sticking like, no, this is what I know.

Because you're clean. You don't drink. I've never drank before. You don't even drink. No, yeah. You don't smoke weed, which also is like the courage you find without any kind of liquid or substance is pretty goddamn impressive. It is.

That's the Lord in you, I guess. There's also jerking off in food. Am I right, people? There's other vices, you know what I mean? Definitely. There's other stuff out there. I won't walk around being like, you know. No, I know all these i don't drink people that that yeah yeah but you've got bodies in the closet yeah they're free yeah you're

yes exactly yeah uh so basically they started having issues with it where they both had duis at some point and they basically were then they are they're functioning alcoholics so separated they both become alcoholics separately but it was something that was dormant you know what i mean like they just didn't drink in front of us for i mean for like probably 14 years even at a restaurant you never saw a glass of wine no my dad drank odules in front of us for years alcohol-free beer and uh he would always let my sister try it which my sister loves beer now i'm like why would you like she's like it's gonna go one way or the other yeah yeah i tasted it like this alcohol for me i was like this is nasty um so they both started having drinking issues uh where they both got duis at different

times and they would still show up to work every day they would never they do this work uh well my mom still works at her job so i'll okay let's keep her employed yeah keep her employed my dad has sold everything under the sun he's he's literally i mean ac fences cars phone stuff like he sold everything so basically they would sometimes drink a little bit too much and then uh they got their duis and there's a breathalyzer that's attached to the car, and they would have trouble blowing into it because it would go off and it locks up the car. You only get three chances, and then you're locked out, and then you have to call a service. It costs a lot of money for them to unlock it. Oh, it's a permanent lock? Like you're not getting that shit undone, huh?

No, no, because it's like, oh, no, you're drunk. You're locked you're you're locked out you're done that's how this one was uh so basically they would still want to go to work and get to work on time so i remember i'd be dead asleep in the middle of the night and then i'd just hear my mom coming to my room she's like bobby bobby come blow you're like what the fuck are you talking about what are you talking about I was like you gotta blow on my car you gotta get it started

so I'd go up there you need jumper cables or something like that but it's different yeah so I'd go up and I would have to blow in it

because I was obviously I was completely sober the only sober one. The only sober one. You can't even go to your sister or brother because they've been drinking with her. There's no one else I could ask, Bubby. You're my last resort, Bubby. Come on. I need that clean breath of yours.

Oh my God. So, and for people who have never blown into a breathalyzer before, it does take a little bit of skill. It's not just – you have to make like a noise. Like it's a – Oh, really? Yeah, you have to really – Oh, you're just not exhaling hard into it?

No, you're going – Fucking didgeridoo breath. Yeah, I get a little bit sick. That's a pepper-shaker didgeridoo. Using that a lot. get a wow, wow. That's a pepper shaker didgeridoo. Using that a lot, man. Hey, man, that's my go-to right now. I need you to work on some space work, play it. Get some new space work.

I do a lot of blowjobs laying with these pepper shakers, you know what I'm saying? It is pretty. It's a pretty solid. It comes in handy, no pun intended, for a lot of different shit. It does, it does. That's all right. So I was. Did you do that for your dad also?

My dad taught me more the technique of how to blow. He's like, you're going to need this. You taught him how to do it accurately. Yeah, yeah, exactly. He taught you how to do it. And then he's like, what helps me is when I sing something patriotic, like Amazing Grace or something. He's like. He's like, what helps me is when I sing something patriotic, like Amazing Grace or something.

He's like, oh, yeah. Sing an Amazing Grace into your DUI breathalyzer. Oh, God. By the way, I love you a lot because I never talk about this stuff. I know you don't i you didn't even come out you didn't even talk about your cancer last time i don't think did you i brought it up yeah yeah no i mean on prior to the show oh no that was the first time i brought it up on your show i brought up the whole episode yeah i was like i was like i brought it up

yeah we talked about it i think we covered it a little bit new stuff no i do appreciate you talking about this yeah your mom and dad might not but we do We've talked about it. I think we covered it a little bit. New stuff. No, I do appreciate you talking about this. Yeah. Your mom and dad might not, but we do here. Yeah, we'll see. So you would do that. How many times do you remember doing that?

I mean, a bunch of times. A bunch. Because my mom worked early in the morning. So wait, she would start the car at midnight and then just leave it run until like 5 and then drive in? She had to be at work super early in the morning, like early morning shifts. So they're sensitive. You have just one or two drinks sometimes before. It'll set that thing off where it's like, nope, you can't drive because you're not supposed to be drinking at all when you have DUI.

If I go out at 1 a.m. blowing and it's like nap, you say I get two more tries. So I could wait until the next morning and try again? Yeah, for sure. Okay. All right. But it's three attempts. I think it's three attempts like in a row. Like boom, boom, boom, and you're done.

Yeah, yeah. It's kind of like how you get locked out like on your phone, like a password or something like that. That's kind of how I remember it. I could be remembering wrong, but yeah. We should have that on our phones too. People should not be on your phone shit-faced. Blowing in their phones before they can text you can't use it yeah you can't text what are you doing yeah trust me don't send that text yeah okay so your parents basically go unhinged a bit how old are they at this time in their 40s 30s uh it would have been so my mom was if i was 14 at the time let's see this is a major math that's

happening right now she would have been uh like there my mom would have been in her 40s and my dad would have been in his 50s okay they're 10 years apart okay So, yeah. They start having a renaissance of activity in their life. I'd never seen my parents drunk before until I was a teenager. So that was shocking for me, knowing one way of life and then completely being like, oh, actually, you know all that time that we spent telling you? Don't do that and you're going to hell if you're doing that. It's like, yeah, we're doing that now. I yeah we're doing that now i'm not blowing his breath i'm on my way

the devil's expecting me yeah yeah man okay so when does uh are they still drinking uh you say they're functioning alcoholics yeah my mom is still drinking and then my dad uh is still drinking he goes like they they've both like done like uh the groups and stuff at different times but they i think that they're both like it does it's not as out of hand as it used to be there it's more under control you know what i mean yeah there's years where it was like like real like they just it's clear like in my family know what I mean? Yeah. There's years where it was like, like real, like they just, it's clear, like in my family,

just in our genetics, like we have that alcoholic gene, like running through our family, like don't have a proper grass. Is that also, what's part of the reason you don't, are you worried you'll become an alcoholic if you do? Um,

I think so. I mean, I, I think it's one of those things where I, I'm an, an, an addict to things that I really like, you know what I mean? And I go 1,000% full steam ahead. So it's definitely one of those things where I never started because I'm like, what's the point? I can only see me wanting to do this in excess.

If it's anything like how I do my comedy and and like try to fill my schedule and stuff like that like i'm a workaholic i know that like you are that's something that's just something that i know too i i don't think if i had an unlimited amount of funds i would still want to work and do shit i just would go nuts sitting around even on vacation i start feeling lazy after the day what can i do i should be. I know. I feel like I start getting a little, which I'm trying to get better at, you know, but. Good luck. I know. It's hard to get that hustle mentality out of you.

You're just, yeah. So you said some of the stuff you sent in, you said your brother used to do some weird torture shit to you guys. Which I didn't even know about, like, until you look back at moments in your childhood, and then you're like, that was weird, man. That was weird. How old is he? How much older than you?

He's three years older. Okay. So he's an older brother that he's like a god to me. I love everything about him. I'm like, he's the coolest. You know what I mean? And he would do weird stuff where one time I remember he handcuffed me and a friend around the toilet, around the base of a toilet. The back of it?

Uh-huh. And he grabbed hairspray and matches and started shooting flames at us. What? That is weird. While we're around the toilet and we're just going, no, no. And he's laughing maniacally and we're like and we're literally me and my friend are literally handcuffed like military grade handcuffs because we used to go to gun and knife shows all the time so i had police handcuffs so we're literally around this

toilet we can't move we have no give it's not toy handcuffs it's metal police handcuffs and we can't move at all. My brother thinks it's the funniest thing. I don't remember how he out-muscled the two of us to get us behind this toilet. But he did. He was strong enough to get two of us like that. And he would just love doing weird stuff like that. Like, he locked one of my friends in a kennel.

Like, when we were babysitting my friend. Like, my dog's kennel. Yeah. And his mom came down. Yeah, and saw it. And she's like, Christopher, what are you doing in the dog kennel? And my brother's like. He's behaving.

He's behaving. He's like, we're playing dog again. I was like, what? What is that? just weird stuff like he like he would um he would i remember one time he outmuscled uh me and a friend he somehow pulled all our clothes off and shoved us outside in the backyard so we're completely naked little kids and he he grabbed our family's home VCR, like, shoulder cam recorder. Nuh-uh.

And he started filming us and laughing. Just laughing at us naked outside. And what did your parents say about this shit? They didn't. I don't think. Like, what? He's just your brother. Boys will be boys.

Like, that kind of thing. Like, it never. Like, we were horrible to each other. Like, because he would do stuff like that, I would get my revenge on him. Like, he would get his braces tightened, I'd punch him in the mouth. He'd start bleeding, and then... We were mean to each other, man. Seriously.

That three days a week church would fuck you all up, man. That's why most people go once. You gotta get those demons out somehow, Ryan. Well, you have something very interesting I want to sort of get to because I believe you brought a journal. Did you not bring a journal? I did. Or you have some entries from a journal.

I brought a journal. This is a first here on Naughty Dude. No one's ever brought a journal to read from. And this is intense for me because I've never read this stuff out loud. So have you ever gone back and read it? Yes. Again, you have. So you know what you're about to read, but you've never read it out loud.

I made some post-its. You highlighted the lowlights for us in the book? Yeah, I tried to help you out. I wanted to come prepared, you know what I mean? This is a first here. Okay, good. I can't believe someone's going to dig into their journal past and read to us here. Holy shit, look at all the post-its says composition

jeremiah watkins august 28 2010 to july 18 2011 this is roughly a year's journal right here yeah very nice so uh little fact about me when i moved to los angeles in july of 2009 i started making daily journal entries and i've kept that up till today that's great so i want to put together like a book or something together someday but this is i was looking through this i was like all right well i'm coming on the honeydew second time i want to do something special for you guys and very you're the man so here we go here we go so these are never before read aloud to anyone but yourself these are inner thoughts these are truly inner thoughts no one else has ever seen these you don't share these with your wife or any probably

she probably i i think i've i've read a couple to her out loud just like because she'll ask me every once in a while she's like what did you write that one day like and i'll be like all right i i'll pull this out and see let's see there's some different stories what do you want me to start with some of the sex stuff or sure let's hear some of the cringe sex stuff oh this is this one I just have this is from

Friday October 15th of 2010 okay so this is 10 years ago and I mean almost to the day well no wait wait Friday you said October 15th is 10 years ago. And I mean almost to the day. Well, no, wait, wait. Friday, you said October 15th. So 10 years ago.

And how old are you 10 years ago? 10 years ago, I would have been 22. All right, 22. And you're in L.A. at this point or not yet? I'm in L.A. Okay. So I moved out to L.A. at 19. Okay. So I've been here just, or excuse me, at 20 I moved to L.A.

So I've been out here for like a year and a half okay basically uh this is just i just titled this entry weird dream um just to give you a sense of like what i was dreaming about back then and stuff like that um it says i slept until 1 10 p.m today i had some weird dreams i had a dream that i was sucking on Kim Kardashian's nipple and I was playing with her boobs. I was also hanging with Playboy bunnies. Later, I was doing stand-up. I have no idea how these correlate. And then that was the end of that interview.

I guess my two favorite things happened in my dreams. I guess so. Kim Kardashian, titties, and stand-up. Oh, here we go. I think this is the first kiss with my wife. Yep, here we go. All right. So my wife, her name's Maya.

Maya picked me up from my place around 9 p.m. We went to go see the social network at the Arclight. I tried to buy her ticket, but she wouldn't let me. Our show time was at 10.50, so we walked down Sunset all the way to the 101, then we turned around. The social network was really good she dropped me back off at the house and i showed her my porch we kissed hugged and then she took off then i got a boner haha whenever i went in for the first kiss i was pretty awkward we laughed

and then tried it again this was one of the few times where the night ended how I thought slash planned it to. I kissed Maya for the first time on October 21st, 2010, which oddly enough, in 2017 of October 21st, that's when we ended up getting married. Whoa. And we didn't even realize that it fell on that day.

The anniversary. You wouldn't realize it if you didn't journal it. You would never fucking remember your first kiss was this day. So then I said, after i kissed her i said i'm such a nerd colin asked me my roommate why i was so happy when i was preparing ramen afterward i said just got back from a date no big deal this may be the jew in me but one of the most attractive things I saw on Maya tonight was when she wouldn't let me pay for her.

I'm like, this chick's a keeper, bro. And then it just goes on. I'm watching the best of SNL 1982 right now. I'm about to go to bed. I wonder if I'll start dating Maya. How's that entry? And you end up marrying her, and you're about to go to bed. I wonder if I'll start dating Maya. How's that entry? And you end up marrying her and you're about to have a child together.

Yep. Which is, I mean, come on, man. Oh, this is a good one. This is a Halloween show that I did. So it was Halloween of 2010. The show at the attic sucked. Annalise came with two friends, one which I thought was really cute. The energy was terrible in the crowd.

It was only people we knew and it was a light turnout. The microphone stopped working intermittently throughout my set and I had to set it down and finish my set by just projecting. I dressed as a baby and only wore a diaper and bonnet. You've got balls, Jeremiah, said John Henry. Afterward, I drove Omar and myself to a Halloween house party, which easily had 100 or more people. I stayed in the diaper and bonnet and had a blast.

It was cracking people up and pissing off some. I was dancing with a hot girl, and I started to get a boner in my diaper and bonnet and had a blast. It was cracking people up and pissing off some. I was dancing with a hot girl and I started to get a boner in my diaper. Boners and diapers don't go together. I'll bet. I got to sleep by about 3 a.m. after i fed the cats there you go that was that do you have an entry in there about any um embarrassing moments or

or what about your you mentioned something about your wife's ring is that in there not in this one not in this one i can tell you about that and we can hop back into this i want to hear about the ring because i want to hear more of these, too. Yeah, yeah. We'll get back to this in a second. So I told you, one of the things I told you before we started the show was when I proposed to my wife, no money whatsoever. How'd you do it so how i did it was basically um i had called and

talked to her like her dad ahead of time stuff like that but before that even before i'd called and talked to him like weeks before like because it had been in the talks of our conversation like what are we like where are we going like that whole thing her dad texted me out of the blue and he's like you have permission to marry my daughter i got that text out of the blue before you even told him anything yeah as i had you met him yeah yeah okay all right all right but like as i was walking on stage at a stand-up show i was about to hit record on uh my phone and then the text comes in you have permission to marry my daughter i was like what like right so i that's all i talked about that night like on state i was like my girlfriend's dad just texted me and i didn't ask him i didn't ask him to this is so weird

and uh i got to a place where i was like no this is like i'm gonna do it eventually like if if she's wanting this to happen like right now like let's make this happen sooner rather than later. Like, cause I, I want to do it eventually, but it just wasn't on my timeline quite yet. So how I ended up doing it is I, uh, took her to the comedy store, uh, in the main room. I didn't have many sets in the main room because that's, that's a harder room to perform in uh typically and uh that is where she first saw me like when i like like before we went on that date to go see that movie like she saw me have like a killer set that night and that like that's how you met she saw you at the comedy you were doing improv at second city okay and basically i was like i have a stand-up show you should come

tonight it's gonna be really fun and then i did had a killer set. And then a couple days later, I was like, hey, you want to hang out? I was still riding that momentum of like, you just saw me kill. You want to go on a date? Yeah, let's go. So I took her to a show there. And then I took her back to the porch where we had our first kiss. And that's where I proposed to her. It was the spot where we had our first kiss.

How long were you dating when you proposed after you proposed uh we had been dating already for uh like six years five six years okay like somewhere around there yeah uh so this engagement ring that i got i've been there bro uh this is another thing that i've uh haven't talked about uh this thing was real cheap like i got it at a marshall's you bought your wife an engagement ring of marshall's you get an engagement engaged ringing some night pants god damn it i had never in my life i didn't even know they had them there i didn't even know they fucking had them maybe they don't maybe they're just rings you're like nah this one's not just a ring wait till i get down on bended knee and bless this fucking ring yeah i remember the guy you talk about glow up going from a marshals to a fucking

lady's ring finger forever shit it was out in west la by the airport out by lax and i was so embarrassed because people could ask you they are always asking where'd you get your engagement ring from and usually there's a story behind it and And I just kept telling people, I was like, I found this boutique jeweler out on the west side, and it was the right ring. And I figured I would get it. And the guy who was checking it out when I was getting the ring, he's like, oh, so what's this for?

And I was like, oh, I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. He goes, really? He's like, this shit ain't going to last. He's like, oh, I'm going to propose to my girlfriend. He goes, really? He's like, this shit ain't going to last. He's like, this one? And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, he's tried to be as nice as possible, but I could see the disappointment. Like, this guy is getting this.

Like, this is his engagement ring. So he was so nice and gave me their nicest box. The nicest Marshall box. He gave me the nicest box on the outside. This thing is, like, amazing. And then you pop it open. What's it look like? Real quick.

Had you and your wife, I mean, you've been together six years. So had she told you what sort of style she liked? Had she talked about anything? Or were you just going out in the dark and grabbing this thing? She said that the ring didn't matter to her. And I go, hey, we're going to test that. Don't matter to me either. We're going to test that theory.

It mattered more to the guy selling it to you. I know. He's like, are you sure you want to? I mean, this is a big deal. Here's the thing. I hope your marriage lasts forever. I don't know if this ring is going to. You know what I mean?

I don't know how diamond this is. Diamond. Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, the ring was one of those things where, like, it was very glittery. One of those glitter, like, very glittery. Eye-catchy, yeah. Eye-catchy. You know, it had those sprinkles all over it right and my wife had been

wanting us to get married like the day that we that i was planning on proposing to her she's like let's stop off at a pawn shop or something and i was like i don't want to stop off at a pawn shop and she's like no no i think it'll be fun and like we pulled over to a pawn shop and she starts trying on pawn shop rings in front of me and she's like telling me her size and stuff and i'm just and meanwhile i have the ring on you on me in my jacket i'm like cool cool i'm just like i'm gonna go look at these beat-up saxophones over here cool go have fun how much were the rings she was looking at in the pawn shop probably like at least 500 which is still nothing how much did you pay for your engagement i've never said this out loud i don't know if i can say how much did you pay for

your engagement ring at marshalls bro can i guess can guess? Because it is Marshalls. I'm going to go with 6850. That's where I'm sitting. No, it was like after tax. They always have those 30% discount sales. I have no idea Marshalls had a jewelry department. Marshalls always has sales. Year-round, they have 30% sales year-round. It doesn't matter what day you go on.

Oh, my God. I think it ended up being like $130. $130. Hey, listen, it's double the price I thought. $130. Hey, listen, it's double the price I thought. Oh, goddamn, $130. Listen, I'm going to tell you what. I fucked up.

And I want you to buy one, by the way. If that shit shit doesn't work out you take a hit like a motherfucker on engagement ring so in all honesty if you're unsure if you're unsure out there i'm thinking marshalls might be the way to fucking go bro yeah you know what i mean they hooked it up god damn that is hilarious so get this so my wife is so sweet. The box was 12. The box was 12, honey. I know, just alone. That's genuine pleather on that box. That's white pleather.

The ring's gone. I still got the box. That's white pleather. Oh, shit. So my wife is such a sweet person that she was just excited that we're getting married, that she hid from me that the ring was so cheap that it was falling apart. Oh, man. For a long time.

The diamonds kept, the stones kept falling out of it. I can't believe what I'm hearing right now. This is blasphemous. How long after your initial purchase? this still under marshall's warranty dude this is under 90 days had you told her where you got it no okay i told her that i got it from a jeweler it was a jeweler jeweler on the west side and uh she hid that from me because she didn't want to hurt my feelings because we didn't have money still don't really have much money but it's one of those things where she's being kind by not telling me she's going to see somebody else but then i found

out that she had been going to get it repaired and i was like how much did you spend and she was spending more on getting it repaired than what was the value of the ring. But the fucking jeweler's not telling her this shit. This is garbage. She goes, one of the stones, the diamond has fallen out. He goes, you mean these metal scraps? He goes, yeah, I put it in for free. I put it in for free.

He said that she went multiple times and a couple times he's just like i just these are just shavings of diamonds these are worth nothing no yeah and she never said that to you no no i had to like i'd be like hey i think you might have got ripped off or anything like that like i'm worried you were took she knew how cheap that thing was but like she showed like one time i was like you know i was looking at her hand i was like there, there's, like, I was like, there's stones missing. She's like, yeah, they've been kind of falling out for a little bit. I was like, what? Like, we got to fix this.

And then eventually I got her a nicer ring. Like, she doesn't still have the Marshalls ring. When did you finally have to come to confess that you got it at Marshalls? She still doesn't know that I got it at marshall's she still doesn't know that i got it at marshall's we should wait to release this out until the baby's delivered bro we should you should wait to she thinks that i got it like a coles or something like that slightly better way better slightly they do have a jewelry department they do they do yeah But I got some good khakis While I was at Marshalls

God damn dude I can't believe it Sickler told me before the episode He goes Man it's pretty cold in here Are you alright? I'm like dude I'm about to be getting so hot Telling you stories

The AC is fine where it's at I'm sweating so much right now Because it's at like i'm i'm sweating so much right now because it's so cringy and embarrassing it's so good dude um all right let's jump back give me a couple of these journal reviews here let's see i mean journal entries yeah yeah all right this one is oh I might save that one. That was pretty sad. That's what we're here for, bro. I mean...

Do you have little titles on them? Yeah. Let me pick. Read me some titles and let me choose. All right. This one says Candace. That's it. That's the sad one.

All right. Do I know that, Candace. Okay. That's the sad one. All right. Do I know that, Candice? Mm-mm. Okay. So before I guess I get into this, because this is a hard one. Okay. When I moved to Los Angeles, I didn't know anybody. And I had a friend that really took me in like under her wing and she would like cook

for me. And we became really good friends. We became really close friends. And she basically was my best friend for like the first year and a half that I lived out in Los Angeles. And she ended up taking her life around the time that she was 25. It was like her 25th birthday. What did she struggle with? I think she just struggled with depression and stuff like that. She ended up hanging herself. How did you find out?

So I was really close friends with her boyfriend, who's still a close friend of mine. Sorry. Ooh. You all right? Yeah, this one's a little bit tough. All right. Please take a minute. I am.

So this girl took you in. How'd you meet her? Did not expect this I met her doing it's the first job that I worked in LA what'd you do for your first job that I worked in. In L.A.? In L.A., yeah. What did you do for your first job here?

I sold artist promotional packages to musicians, which ended up being a scam later, so I had to leave the job. Oh, you didn't know it was a scam when you were there? You're selling people bogus shit. Yeah, yeah. And this is how you met Candice? Yeah, it was a scam when you were there. You're selling people bogus shit. Yeah, yeah. And this is how you met Candice? Yeah, she was, like, a great salesperson at this job. And I was horrible because I just wanted to hang out and, like, riff with people and stuff like that.

And basically, she would cook for me, and she like a sister basically and i'm sorry man i'm like no please don't be do you want to take a break no i might just get some tissues here a second but i'm good so she was so she was just awesome today. She really looked after me and stuff. And she would, every Saturday night, I'd go over there to hang out with her and her boyfriend. And she was just a good friend. She was somebody who looked out for me, who my mom was like, it comforted her that I had somebody. Sure, her son's so far away from home she's got

this good person he's got this good person looking after him yeah yeah so um that was that was one of the things that that kind of hit me a little bit hard about brody was yeah the way he uh that he went because uh man i'm sorry man don't be sorry. Because it was so similar, like the way that he was found and stuff like that. I'm sorry, man. No, take your time. Thank you. Thank you, Ash.

We'll put an ad in here. We'll put an ad in here. We'll take a break. We'll be an ad in here. We'll put an ad in here. We'll take a break. We'll be right back after this cry session real quick. We'll leave you crying. Drop an ad and come back. You're still crying. You haven't even gathered yourself yet.

That's not from the movie. Hang on right there, Jeremiah. Listen, take a quick break. Tell you about our next sponsor, Upstart. You're listening to the honey, y'all ryan sickly i hope you're enjoying yourself right now i don't know why i turned this into a therapy session but i did i was just talking about i was just talking a second ago about getting boners and diapers and then it

and then it went went south real quick i'm so sorry gather yourself please we'll get back to it in a second here hey hey everybody get your night pants right now there's tissue on the table and shit. Oh, God. I'd like to keep as much as... You know what works really good with tears? Jeremiah Wonders T-shirts. You can get it at jeremiahwatkins.com. They work really good with... Is that for me?

That's for you, bro. That's my shirt, guys. That's your shirt. With's your shirt with real tears there's real tears real tears jeremiah wonders great podcast i had so much fun on it this is this is the dumbest i can't believe this is this this has comedians how we try to deal with with deep trauma that hasn't been talked about forever oh fuck so she was an amazing friend who just like i felt comfortable in la my family felt good about me having somebody who was had my best interest at heart who had my back and um i became really close with her and her boyfriend and uh i think the tipping point for her was her 25th birthday.

She was trying to get people to just come out. And a bunch of people ghosted her and just didn't come and just were flaky. You know what I mean? And she obviously was dealing with a lot of depression and stuff like that. And this put that over the top. Oh, man. And my brother was visiting at the time and my mom's like you don't need to go to her party now your brother's in town visiting no how often is your brother in town and

i was like no i have to go to this party like like i gotta be there for candace and like i went and i like i was i was like one of the only friends that showed up and her last Facebook status was like just her she's like she's like I just she's like I just need like I like I just need a girl's night like I just need like a couple friends to like is anybody is anybody, like, available? Like, anybody? Like, everybody just, like, literally comments on this Facebook thread, like, sorry, like, I wish I could see you. Like, people, like, just, like, putting it off kind of thing. Like, I don't think anybody, like, actually, like, reached out.

Like, actually just was there for her. And I'll read what I have written, I guess. Yeah. You sure? Yeah. Get the Kleenex, bro. I know, I know. This will be good. You can keep them up on the table.

Just keep them on deck. I don't know who you think you're fooling. I know, I know. I'm not as strong as I'd like to think I am. You're watching The Honey, dude. y'all, with Ryan Sickler. Well, I will say this. I have to say, this woman must have meant the world to you because, my God. Here, geez. I'm sorry, man.

Let me throw those Kleenex on the floor. Just not yet. Let's sanitize the table when we're done. My nose is so big. All the cleaners just start popping up. We had to burn the studio. We had to get a blanket over here. He used the carpet.

Okay. All right. One of my best friends, Candace, passed away today. My friend called me after improv practice at Sunset Grill and told me that Candace hung herself and was dead. I was in disbelief. I got to their apartment as fast as I could. The police and coroner was there when I arrived. As soon as I saw my friend, I broke down and started bawling. How could this have happened? She was such a good person. She was a very emotional person,

but I never thought that anything like this would ever happen. On was such a good person. She was a very emotional person, but I never thought that anything like this would ever happen. On Saturday, she was upset because not enough people came to her birthday party. Her boyfriend kept telling me how much she was loved, and he said, she really loved you, Jeremiah. You were a good friend. At 10.30, I did the Valuement U show at IOS in the Delcos Theater, which is an improv group that I was a part of at the time. It was a pretty good show. Peter asked me what I was holding back after the show,

and I broke down again. I tried to keep it together, but I couldn't. I talked to Billy around until about 12.20 a.m. He gave his condolences. I loved Candace so much. She was like a sister to me. I can't believe she's gone. around until about 12, 20 a.m. He gave his condolences. I loved Candace so much. She was like a sister to me. I can't believe she's gone.

I'm emotionally drained right now. Aunt Cindy's death hit me hard tonight too. I pray that God helps my friend and I through this time. So within the first year and a half uh, can I say something real quick? Yeah. Yeah. The, the wherewithal and the strength and the power to put pen to paper during a time like that is pretty impressive.

Not just the process, not just the thinking talk, but also to write something down. I wish I would have gone back and done that when i was 16 years old i wish i could have should have wrote something down to go back and look on that because also these are great to look at where you were where you are now and the people that helped influence that and and were a part of that. So what were, what was it like after that? I mean, it was just, it was just hard because I think one of the reasons why I wanted to force myself to share this today was suicide is just one of of those things that like i don't think that the

people who you know they're obviously not thinking it through when they happen they don't realize the pain and anguish that they're gonna that the people have to live with after they're gone and how much people care about them i'm still still thinking about Candace. Look at you. Years later, I'm a mess. What year was this again? 21? This was like 2010, 11. Yeah. 2010, 2011.

Yeah, 2010. A decade ago. Yeah. So it's like, you know what I mean? It's just one of those things where if this can help anybody realize that they're loved and that this is what it does to people, then I'm happy to share this hurtful story. Do you want to get to a little more lighthearted, horrible shit and tell me about the... Do you want to do that real quick before I tip to your last story?

Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Basically – I'm trying to move you away from the sadness. Yeah, yeah, for sure. We've got a tissue budget here to do, Jeremiah. You've already – I know.

I've already – You've already dipped into it. I've already gone over it. So basically when you're grieving, the thing that's hard about it and what happened in the first year and a half that I moved to L.A., I lost an aunt that I really loved. I lost Candace, and I lost my big pop, my grandpa, on my mom's side. So that kind of all, like, you know, those stack when that happens. Also, to me at least, when I would lose a relative back home,

it felt like I was on the other side of the world. You know what I mean? So far away and removed where I couldn't get there in time and all that stuff. It always felt weird to have someone pass when I wasn't there. This was hard, and I literally had a talk with my uncle. Literally last year I didn't go back for my aunt's funeral, and I told him that I regretted it for a decade almost. And I told him that I regretted it like for a decade almost.

And we both like cried about it. And he's like, I never like held that against you or anything, but that's very nice of you that you, you know, so thank you for like that. Which that was a good cathartic moment for us both is us like just like realizing like, hey, I was a kid when like I don't. Funerals are not meant sometimes for you. You're supposed to be there for the other people. Even if you're not a funeral person, and I'm not, I would rather celebrate somebody's life than go to a funeral. Other people need you there, and they will sometimes hold that against you down the road.

Not that my uncle did, but just a life lesson that I learned, kind of a different way just get into some more light thursday january 20th 2011 i trimmed my pubes for the first time in my life how old were you again bro i was 22 i was in my 20s, bro. All right. Yeah. My penis felt weird all day, and my Superman underwear did not support me at all. That's motherfucker. You've got a shaved dick behind Superman underwear. Oh, dude.

Well, I'll tell you what. Put the journal down. I don't want to take you through any more of that. And tell me about this. Go ahead if you have one more. But I'm dying to hear about this Dave Chappelle story. Okay. Yeah, that's probably how we'll close the episode.

I'll do one more quick one um this one this one says uh oh i can't believe i wrote this this is so weird yep this is very bizarre um i'm talking about my wife now i said uh i was we're doing some writing for a sketch and we didn't get very far we started making out on my bed and that was pretty cool we talked about our relationship and the label of boyfriend girlfriend uh i can't even read right. Anyway, we were kissing for a while. Then she said, do you want to make out with our shirts off? Our shirts off.

Are you guys the same age, by the way, roughly? Yeah. Okay. Before I knew it, I said, said sure and had my shirt off i thought she was gonna keep her bra on but no i was pleasantly surprised i sucked on my first boobies today. Other than my mom's when I was a baby. That was the first time you'd ever sucked little girls boobs. Oh my god. Oh dude. oh my god we rolled around made out and felt out each other up for quite a while we're in bed for almost a couple hours mama called me after 6pm which was 8ish her time

she was asking me why I hadn't called her I told her I was hanging with Maya and she knew something was up I said I'll call you tomorrow as I was grinning ear to ear and that's the end of that well glad that turned out good for you now your baby is about to start sucking

on your wife's titties. How about that? We'll get to these another time. You'll be back, bro. You'll be back with that book. I've got a stack of these. I bet. Every decade?

That's a year, right? How many years have you been doing this? Yeah, I've been doing it the last 11 years. Man. How are you not doing that podcast? I don't know. Jeremiah, give it to people to read because it's obviously really easy for me to freaking do i mean i would have people sit and read your entries to you and be like what the fuck's going on here oh that's you were you were 22 and you

sucked on your first titties yeah man and talk about that took a minute Okay, so this story, a lot of highs and then ends with a low. That's the show, bro. That's the show. So this just happened a few weeks ago. I was out in New York promoting my special, and people were kind enough to have me on their podcast and stuff out there in the New York scene, and I was doing spots and stuff like that. So I'm doing a rooftop show through like Stand Up New York

or one of the clubs, and the host on the show was like, Hey, I heard that Dave Chappelle is having a secret snl after party uh tonight at the stand and i go oh really he was running his monologues and stuff there right originally yeah he was hosting um and he was hosting snl that weekend and um so i go really um that's cool i have a spot there a little bit later tonight so maybe i'll talk to the manager and see what's up. So I talked to the manager and he's like, yeah, it's happening for sure. He's like, I'll do my best to get you in. But we'll see.

I mean, it's his after party. So I can't make any guarantees. I'm like, cool. I'm like, what time should I come back? And he's like, come back at like 1.30. Because by the time they're wrapped with SNL and everything, you know, it takes a while for the after party to even get started. So I go out to the Bronx.

I'm playing sax out on this buddy's gig out there. So I have my sax with me. And I roll back into the city around 1.30 in the morning, take an Uber from the Bronx all the way back to Manhattan. And I go to the door. Sax my hand. And there's a guy with a clipboard. And he goes, yeah, what's up?

I was like, hey. I heard Dave's having his thing here. I'm just going to head in. He's like, what's your name? I was like, Jeremiah Watkins. And going to head in. He's like, what's your name? I was like, Jeremiah Watkins. And he goes, nope. Just straight up. Nope.

And I go, okay. Okay. Cool. Cool. Cool. I was like, I'm going to text some people. He goes, you do that. I was like,'m gonna i'm gonna text some people he goes you do that i was like all right so i go randomly uh i know dave's manager because i used to play basketball with him like 11 years ago and we stayed in touch and he's nice enough to respond to my text messages still and so i texted him and i texted the manager of the club and i was like hey i'm outside uh stand right now i'd love to you know come in

night he's like how many people in your party we're already over capacity like he got back to me right away he's like i don't know but i'll do my best manager got back to me immediately he goes show this text to the door guy i'm gonna get you in i was like okay great go up to the door guy again i was like uh here you go and the guy looks at it and then he looks at me. He's like, all right, head on in. He goes, but go to that back room immediately. I go, okay. They're doing rapid COVID testing.

So people can either stay at the party or bounce, you know? So I'm getting this test done. I see like some different comics there, like Joe DeRosa. By the way, I'm going this test done. I see some different comics there, like Jodorowsky. By the way, I'm going to preface this. There's going to be name dropping in this story just because of – For the story. For the story, for what it is. Okay.

Different comics. I see Jodorowsky and some different people that are already there. And I'm kind of saying what's up. I'm like, yeah, I got to go get my test. And it's just exciting that you're seeing other people that are also inside you're like oh this is cool like is this about to happen i go to get my covid test and uh the lady like has me fill out paperwork and stuff like that and then without telling me she just shoves the thing up my nose i'm like you want me to sit down or anything like this and like she's like no you're fine just like doing that just like you

know doing the whole thing my you know my big nose like she's like climbing no, you're fine. She's like doing that. She's like, you know, doing the whole thing. You know, big nose. Like she's like climbing a spiral staircase to get to the top. She's shimmying like a chimney sweep up there. And I have to wait 10 or 15 minutes before I know if I have COVID or not. And during those 10 or 15 minutes, I have so much anxiety, bro, because the next week, like I'm planning a move with my wife back in la so if like if i have covet i have to quarantine in new york for two weeks that would cost a crazy amount of money and then also i'm the la comedian that brought covet i interacted with probably 50 comedians that week doing their podcasts and doing gigs and i went

to philly that week and like i was in cars with like big j and dan soda all those guys and i'm i'm stressed i'm like this is gonna be the worst thing ever if i can't and then luckily she comes over to me puts a bracelet on me so he goes okay you're good to go head over there see security talk to security um he you know puts one of those magnet things on my phone so you can't be texting or taking photos or videos or anything he's like all right man have fun head on down head down into the basement of the stand and uh basically i start seeing more comics more new york comics uh that i know and stuff like that and on stage there's two djs um and one dj i don't know but one the other dj i do know uh is cypha Sounds. He's a great DJ,

works with Chappelle a lot. And I was like, what's up, man? We'd worked together on the Impractical Jokers cruise. And I just started chopping up with him a little bit. And I was like, yeah, man, I brought my sax just in case tonight. He goes, oh, for real? He's like, we might use that. Okay, cool. I was like, all right. So I put in the back, I'm like, that's kind of crazy let's see like derrick gaines and like dulce sloan some different new york comics and stuff they're starting to hang out and we're all hanging out and and basically a waitress comes around you can get whatever you want and i was like sweet like they're like yeah it's all dave like get whatever

you want so i got a pizza and a coke and i was like this is amazing so dulce and i just put a pizza and stuff and we're just waiting for the after party to kind of start because the celebrities and different people hadn't been there yet from the show because they're literally just getting off stage and leaving 30 rock and stuff like that so the energy changes all of a sudden in the room because dave chapelle walks in the room man of the the hour. And everybody just starts cheering for him. He just killed it on Saturday Night Live. And it's just like this cool moment. And he takes the stage and starts talking on the mic.

And he says a very cool welcoming speech to everybody. He goes, if you're in this room tonight, you're meant to be here. So don't treat tonight like some lottery ticket or something like that you're wanted here so be comfortable we went out of our way to make sure everybody's safe and tested and negative nobody has covid so just enjoy yourself tonight and have fun and i was like that's all you needed to hear that's all i needed to hear is I'm a part of this. You know what I mean? I'm going to be here.

I was like, Chappelle just told me that he wants me here. So we're dancing around and stuff like all the comics and stuff. Like Sypha's like hitting like dope hip hop. And like Dave's kind of emceeing a party. He's just like the conductor of this party party like the vibes and stuff like that and the energy changes again in the room because everybody's head turned and in walks chris rock with jim carrey come on jesus christ and chapelle goes give it up for Chris Rock and Jim Carrey. They join him on stage of the stand, and everybody's just in awe

because these three titans of comedy are on the mic together. They're just riffing, and they're just like still in ecstasy from a great SNL. And that day was the day that Biden got elected. And those guys are all supporters of Biden. So they were extra excited. And Kerry's doing them now. And Kerry's literally doing Biden on Saturday Night Live. He is Joe Biden.

Sypha Sounds hits Nipsey Hles and ygs fuck donald trump and chris rock jim carrey and dave chappelle all start screaming fuck donald trump the whole stand is chiming in it's like a back and forth and i'm jumping up and down just literally i'm laughing i'm just laughing at how ridiculous what is happening around me. You know what I mean? And out of nowhere, the energy changes again because Andrew Yang, the presidential candidate, pops up on stage and he goes, let's give it up for Joe Biden. No.

Yes. Joe Biden was there? No, no. I was like, what? This motherfucker rolled in? He's just giving it up for Joe Biden. He just got it. I was like, I don't want to give it up for the ghost of Tupac. 2.30 in the morning.

What are you doing? You just won, man. Go get some sleep. And then he disappears out of nowhere. And then the energy shifts again. It keeps getting higher and bumped up higher and higher. Because Chappelle then goes, ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Dave Grohl. Come on.

Dave Grohl from Foo Fighters walks in and joins them on stage. Now it's Dave Grohl, Chappelle, Jim Carrey, and Chris Rock all standing next to each other like chumming it up, just like riffing and stuff, having a good time. And they drop There Goes My Hero by the Foo Fighters. Come on. And they

played it so loud it blew the speakers in the stand. And quickly they had to like, and then Chappelle's like trying to talk on the mic he's like he's like oh man this mic's fucked up all right so the djs quickly spin their monitors around that they had for them and then they use it as speakers for the house they literally had this party still going within 90 seconds it was crazy they're professionals that's what they do so the vibe is going strong and everything like that.

And I'm just like looking around. I'm like, man, this is awesome. This is great. And I see, I keep finding myself looking at Jim Carrey because he's my idol. He's like my number one favorite comedian. If you like classify that, it's always like Jim Carrey, Steve Martin, and Chris Farley are my guys when people ask me. And the first time that I was supposed to meet Jim Carrey was at Roast Battle at the Comedy Store, the show that I was part of every week.

He came to the Comedy Store after not being there for like 20 years and judged Roast Battle. And I was not there. Why? When did you ever miss a roast battle exactly I took a week gig in Reno to pay my bills so my phone is blowing up in the middle of the night like I went to go pee and I checked my phone like kind of tired and then like I saw on my phone like where were you tonight you missed Jim Carrey and I like looking at my phone I go on Facebook I saw on my phone, like, where were you tonight? You missed Jim Carrey. And I'm like, looking at my phone, I go on Facebook, I go on Instagram. It's littered with people taking pictures with Jim Carrey and stuff.

And I looked at those photos, and I cried myself to sleep. I can understand. It's part of the show that I'm on every week. Every week. And I'm physical on that show. I get to be silly and zany and goofy. You'd have been able to play with him, say shit to him. I would have been trying to riff with him the whole thing.

It was crushing to me. That was the first time I was supposed to meet him. Second time, I held back. It was at Mitzi Shore's funeral smart smart to hold back there yeah i was like i can't do this i can't be the guy that goes up to jim carrey like when he's mourning somebody who he just lost and be like i'm a big fan man i passed i saw him i was like that's good enough for me i said he's in the building at the comedy store. This is a special moment. I'll hold on to it regardless. I would say you did the right thing. I did. So I'm looking around.

I see him talking to Punky Johnson, our friend, newest cast member on SNL. Yeah. And he is talking with Punky on stage at the stand. And I'm just like, this is so cool. I'm going to walk over. Even if I don't talk, I just want to remember what he's saying to Punky. And a couple of other people who worked at the comedy show were there, like Bianca and Lee, and I'm talking with them a little bit,

but also kind of keeping focus on what Jim is saying to Punky. And Punky's like, I love you, Jim. And he's like, I i love you you're doing so great on the show like keep up the great work like he's just being so nice to her and encouraging she's like i've gone 15 minutes on how much i love you and and and he's like no it's uh that's very nice you say but i love you keep up the great work and they they you know they hug and then punky rolls off and uh the stage and i was hoping ideally that the conversation would just naturally swing to you roll into me because i'm right there but have you ever been in like a circle where

you realize like you weren't a part of the conversation the entire time and then you're just left standing there that's what it was so he goes back to bopping his head during music he's still wearing his mask because he's there's some people wearing their mask and inside even though they just got covid tested they're still not wanting to take it off he's bopping his head around and then i i just i'm like jeremiah if you're gonna talk to him this is this is literally the closest he's as close as we are right now and i'm at the foot of the stage on the floor and i just i look up at him and i I just... You touch him? I touch him. Where?

If you're looking up, where are you touching him? I do one of these. And he looks down, and I'm looking up. And I'm like, hey, Jim, I'm a paid regular with Punky at the Comedy Store. I just wanted to tell you that I just read your recent book that you put out, Memoirs of Misinformation. I really enjoyed it.

He goes, oh, I'm glad you enjoyed it. That's really nice. And I go, and obviously, I'm a fan of everything you do. I love everything you do. That's what I said. Obviously, I love everything you do. He goes, that's very nice. He goes, what's your name?

I go, Jeremiah jeremiah watkins and he looks at me he goes he like reaches his hand down and this is covet time so this is a big deal to me he reached his hand down and he his hands are probably the same size as mine but they felt like giant hands wrapping around mine shake my hand he goes nice to meet you man he goes well took me 15 years of working the clubs before i started landing anything so all i can say is just enjoy the ride i said i'm grateful for everything uh absolutely all the time i'm grateful for everything thank you and that was that was all i knew that that was all that that I needed. I bowed out after that. I was like, I'm not going to try to yank his ear or anything.

I said what I needed to, kind of thing. But now I'm feeling real good. I'm on another level now. I can't wait. I just met Jim Carrey, my idol. Who can I talk to now? I'm looking at flights to try to postpone to not go home because it's already past 3 in the morning.

It's like 3.30. My flight's at 6.30. And it takes a while to get out to JFK, as you know, from in the city. I'm trying to plan. No flights are available. I also don't want to call my wife and be like, I missed my flight because I stayed. But she would be cool, whatever.

She would understand. But no flights available. Like, until the next day, I'm would be cool, whatever. She would understand. But no flights available. Like, until the next day, I'm like, oh, I have to go home. So I got to make something happen. And I go up to the DJ and I go, man, this song is making me want to play sax. And he goes, oh, yeah? Go grab it. I go, what?

He goes, go grab your sax. Let do it i go uh okay i go back assemble my sax real quick and i'm in the back of the room and this lady sees me with the sax he goes are you about to go on stage with them because dave is still conducting he's being a vibe creator he's conducting just the feels of this party it's his parties his after parties his private thing and i go i think like yeah i think so i'm just we'll see maybe in a second and then punky sees me and she goes are you about to go up on stage jay i was like yeah i'm feeling it out like trying to find the key and stuff the right pitch and everything and she goes you gotta get your ass up there okay so i start playing the sax as i walk to the stage you're playing yourself on

but only the dj knows that you've got only the dj knows that i got the green light so i start playing myself on and it gets a great response because it's a party there's a dude with a sax that's randomly appearing on the stage it sounds cool it's like oh this is great you know and dave looks over at me and he shoots me a look and he sees and he's listening for like half a second, and he goes, gives me a nod of approval. I'm like, dope. So I hang back a little bit on the stage,

and I'm just chiming in a little bit here and there, feeling it out, you know, just adding a little licks here and there, because it's like different hip-hop and stuff that's being played, and he looks at me after a little bit, after I'm playing, and he goes,

like a little bit less, a little bit less. I was like, I got you Dave Chappelle. No problem. So I'm doing a little bit less. And the DJ, Sypha,

he leans over. He's like, he's like, put on these headphones. Can you play this hook of this, of this horn section? I go, let me listen to it real quick. Listen to and i'm like okay i got it so he plays the next song horn section comes in i start playing it sounds pretty good dave looks over me again he

goes you got two of them now got two of them now that was my second warning i go yeah yeah i got you man yeah and the dj pulls me aside he goes hey man on this next song i'm about to play kill me softly this is his favorite song do not play on any part where there's vocals if he's singing don't play sax i was like sure, sure, no problem. So I started waiting. Everybody, the whole crowd. I'm getting nervous. I'm getting nervous. Best vibes.

Everybody's just like living it. This is Dave's favorite song. People can feel that radiating off of him. So I wait for moments where there's not lyrics. I'm like, da-da-da-da-da-da-da, like little stuff like that. And Dave looks over and he goes, third and final time. And he goes. I just waved you off like a fly.

He shooed me. Oh, shit. he shooed me oh shit and with under two seconds security from the back of the room shoots me a look like come here and like but he looked at you and did that dave looked directly you're not security no no like you look at you like jeremiah you're done you're, you're done. Get the fuck off. You're done. You're done, bro. And so I security like. Did you play yourself off? No. You should have. Meanwhile, I'm wearing a sax hat too.

Yes, I'm wearing my merch, my Jeremiah Watkins sax hat. I'm all saxophone out. I'm the sax guy right now. And I'm bobbing my head and I'm grooving to the music. And then I exit off stage slowly as I kind of dance off. And the security goes, hey, man, I think it's time we pack up that sex tonight he goes and i love seeing you up there man he goes i'm a sax player myself but i think dave's a little over it now i was like hey i appreciate you being cool and pulling me aside

like this that's really nice of you and uh yeah uh i said cypher said it was cool for me to go up like i wouldn't just do that without permission, so I appreciate it. And he's like, no, absolutely, man. Have a good night. And I packed up my sacks. I left immediately. You try to get that flight back. I was trying to get on the flight before.

You got an early one? You got an early one? Because I didn't want to be remembered to Chappelle as the guy who crashed his party, who was uninvited. And I'm like... God, I hope that pops up in the next special. Like, there was this one night. God, I hope it comes up in the next special.

The sax guy. Yeah, man. Dude, that had to feel awful. Dude, I literally just went from the highest high of meeting Jim Carrey to being shooed by Chappelle. And getting the okay from Chappelle at first. And getting the okay at first. Like, all right. And then like, nah.

And then, yeah, I went to the airport. I found a $5 bill on the ground and then boarded the flight and made it home safe. There it is, bro. There it is. Dude, this has been such a really good episode. Thank you so much for coming on here and i mean man you went for it bro i tried man you brought a journal which is the first time anybody's read from a journal on this show um i'm sorry for your loss i can tell that candace meant the world

to you and still does yeah which is i hope somebody out there someday when i'm gone talks about me and feels about me like that after 10 years I really do because that woman made an impression on you obviously yeah I mean well it just goes to show you that kindness and love can really go a long way when when people need it and like I said like it's just an example like I'm a grown man who has a pretty good grip on my emotions and like I did not expect that to come i'm like i got this i'll be able to read about this no problem and dude it just hit me really hard like flooding back good memories and stuff that i had uh with her as a friend and stuff like

that so uh if you you know i don't want to make a psa or anything but if you're if you're thinking about doing something harmful for yourself like there's people who love you that want your best interest like don't do anything like that like give somebody a call like it's worth making the effort to give a call because somebody cares about you enough to make an effort to respond so yeah and that's not a psa that's great advice and it's it's yeah thank you for sharing it and as your family used to say, amen. Amen. Amen. Please, promote everything again. Your special, all of it. My one-hour special is on Amazon Prime,

Video On Demand, Apple TV. If you want to find it, you can find it pretty easily. Or if you're an audio person, my album is Jeremiah Watkins Family Reunion. The special and the album

are streaming on all platforms right now. And like I said, great podcast with Ryan Sickler on Jeremiah Wonders and Jeremiah Stand Up on all social media. I love you, brother. Thank you for letting me share that and have some breakthroughs, I guess. Yeah, man. Well, thank you for sharing and thank you for being open enough to come here and do that.

I appreciate it. You know I love you. Hit me up. As always, Ryan Sickler on all social media. RyanSickler.com We'll talk to you all next week. Bye.