The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Jim Florentine - FlorentineDew

Episode Date: June 17, 2024

This week's Honeydew is Jim Florentine! Don't miss his latest special, 'Bite the Bullet,' available on his website, and check out his podcast 'Everybody is Awful.' Jim joins me to highlight the lows of losing his father when he was 28. Growing up as one of seven kids, Jim recalls his father's incredible involvement throughout his childhood. We swap stories about our dads coaching our Little League teams. Jim also reminisces about times his dad helped him sneak into Madison Square Garden wearing his mother’s platform boots for pro wrestling shows. We discuss the impact of his father's passing on their family dynamics and how these memories influence Jim's approach to parenting today. SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://youtube.com/@rsickler SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! You now get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! Sign up for a year and get a month free! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew What’s your story?? Submit at [e-mail] CATCH ME ON TOUR https://www.ryansickler.com/tour Dallas, TX - Sep. 14th  La Jolla, CA - Sep. 20th & 21st  Salt Lake City, UT - Sep. 27th  Denver, CO - Sep. 28th  Chicago, IL - Oct. 11th & 12th Detroit, MI - Nov. 8th   Minneapolis, MN - Nov. 9th Madison, WI - Nov. 15th & 16th  Portland, OR - Nov. 23rd Ft. Lauderdale, FL - Dec. 6th  Tampa, FL - Dec. 7th  Tempe, AZ - Dec. 20th and 21st    Get Your HoneyDew Gear Today! https://shop.ryansickler.com/ Ringtones Are Available Now! https://www.apple.com/itunes/ http://ryansickler.com/ https://thehoneydewpodcast.com/ SUBSCRIBE TO THE CRABFEAST PODCAST https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crabfeast-with-ryan-sickler-and-jay-larson/id1452403187 SPONSORS: Liquid I.V. -Get 20% off your order when you shop better hydration at https://www.LiquidIV.com and use code HONEYDEW Rocket Money -Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to https://www.RocketMoney.com/HONEYDEW Mack Weldon -Get 20% off your first order at https://www.MackWeldon.com when you use code HONEYDEW

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All right, now you guys know what we do over here. We highlight the low lights. I always say these are the stories behind the storytellers. Very excited to have this guest back on the Honeydew, ladies and gentlemen, Jim Florentine. Welcome back to the Honeydew. Thanks for having me, man. Bro, you look good.

You look good. I like seeing you. You're one of those people when I see you. I've just recently gotten to know you more, but you have such a good energy. You always have a smile on your face. I always like to. You're always a guy like to pull aside and chat it up with and not just respectfully say hello and keep to myself.

No, I appreciate that, man. I've always been like that. Man, I get along with all the comics. I don't care what anybody's doing. I don't care if they're doing better to me or worse. I don't I never got involved in that stuff. Good for everyone. Yeah. I said there's room for everyone out there. I said that years ago when the Internet didn't exist. When it everyone. I said there's room for everyone out there. Yes. I said that years ago.

When the internet didn't exist. When it didn't exist. I said there's gonna be 400 cable channels, everyone can have a show. So I don't mind, I just do my own thing. Well, your own thing, please plug all of it, man. Everything and everything. Well, I do a podcast,

Everybody Is Awful comes out every Monday. And then, yeah, see me on tour, jimflorentine.com, roll the tour dates. Whatever just comes out. I'm all over the place. You know how it is. I know how it is. Yeah, I still love doing it, man.

I've been doing it a long time. I still love getting out there and doing it. Well, there's nothing like that, you know? I say that we record these ahead so far sometimes because we're out doing all these other things and there's just the immediate rush of standup. of standup. This, some might be like, that thing you and Florentine said was funny. I'm like, man, we said it three weeks ago and you know, it was in the moment,

but standups instant. Yeah. I took like three weeks off in December cause I was on the road a lot in the fall and I missed it. Like I didn't think I was going to miss it, but then I just went and did a guest set at a local club and I got that adrenaline back. I didn't have it for three weeks and it felt good. Well, I'm glad to have you back. I wanted to talk to you about your father passing. Can I ask you this? How old were you when he passed? 28.

And how old was he? 58. Okay. So 28, you're still a young man. I only ask because my father died when I was 16 and he was 42. He was like, I want to say like five or six days before his 43rd birthday. Wow. So young, you know. Were you close with your dad?

Yeah. Tell me about him a little bit. Like what did he do for a living? Like who was he? Well, we had seven kids in the family you know Irish Catholic. All same mom and dad? Yep. Okay. Oh yeah you know Irish they don't get divorced. They don't pull out either. They don't pull out they don't get yeah exactly I think he was seven for seven. Damn. Yeah. It's not I know everyone's like oh whatever there's gazillions it's

if you're trying to have a kid like it's not always a sure shot at all. People take years sometimes, man. He had seven. It always amazed me when I hear anything like five or more. And there was like four right in a row every year. Then they took like a year off. Then another one came and then they took like another year off, another one and two years off and another one.

But where are you? I'm right in the middle. Right in the middle. Yeah. How many boys, how many girls? Four boys, three girls. Whew. All right. So was he just working and I mean, in between we're fucking. What else was he doing? I don't know.

You know, it's like, you know, we never saw it. I was I was a parent's bedroom. We didn't know what was going on. We didn't even think. That's a lot of fucking. Yeah, I know. You know, and they got I was I was a parent's bedroom. We didn't know what was going on. We didn't even think. That's a lot of fucking enough. Yeah, I know. You know, and they got married when they were like 20. That's what they did back then.

Were they in love? Like, do you remember like seeing them hug and they were affectionate couple? My dad would get her like 50 Christmas presents, all these different outfits. He'd go to like Macy's or these expensive stores. And we'd have to sit there on Christmas day and watch, open every one like, I want to play my toys. Oh, hell yeah. He'd make you to sit there on Christmas day and watch open every one. Like, I want to play with my toys.

Oh, hell yeah. He'd make you guys sit and watch your mother open them. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because, you know, he's all this outfit. Oh, yeah, I can wear this. I'm like, I'm 12. I want to freaking play with my toys and stuff. But but no, he was really.

And they would go on weekend getaways, you know, go get a hotel on the beach for the weekend and stuff like that. So he was really romantic. And they were. Yeah, they were. They'd be married to this day if they were, you know, they get a hotel on the beach for the weekend and stuff like that. So he was really romantic and they were. Yeah, they would. They would be married to this day if they were, you know, they're both still around. See, I remember my parents were not that way at all. And before they got divorced, like the shit fell apart in the third grade. Divorced by fifth.

But I remember seeing them hug. That's as much as I remember one time, like once. Really? And it was kind of like, you know. You're one of those, yeah. Yeah, you know, that kind of thing. So it's nice to hear. So they're affectionate, they're not always,

seven kids, a lot of fucking stress and everything. You're not seeing a lot of arguments and things like that. Not really, you know, my dad went to work, my mom stayed home, was a traditional, you know, that's how it used to be. So she took care of the kids, she didn't work, and then he went to work. And what did he do?

He was an accountant, so he worked at Dun & Bradstreet, had a good job, commuted to New York City from New Jersey, took the bus every morning, got off the bus, probably left at 7 a.m., 6 a.m., something like that, came home at like 6 o'clock at night. Damn. And you know, my mom just took care of everything, did with the kids, and then she'd report back to him

when he came home. And this is what they did today, whatever, if there's any problems. So she was way more hands on with it, but he was out working, but then also we all played sports. So my dad was my coach, my little league coach. You know, whenever I was in the league. I see that's really involved in your guys.

Oh yeah, so he'd get right off the bus from New York and get right to practice. We'd have a practice. It's light up. It was great. Yeah. And then he was my, you know, he's my coach at little league. So, you know, but he didn't favor me though, because, you know, a lot of times if I had an attitude, he would bench me or whatever.

And he definitely didn't. Yeah, that was my father too. Like I'm not giving you any favoritism. If you're not the best one out there, you're not going to play. I'm going to be harder on you than anybody else because I know what you can do. That kind of shit. Yeah. Yeah. No, I coached my kids, rec basketball team, my son, and he yelled at me from the courts. I yelled at him. You got to get that ball, get that rebound. He goes, Oh, you want me to get the rebound?

How am I going to get it when I'm over here right in the middle, like in the whole court? And I go timeout. I called the time out and yanked him out of the game. Dude, I can't believe it's so fun. And I told the team, I go, listen, if we lose, it's because of Luke. My son Luke. I go, so just know, he talked back to his dad. And if you guys do it too, I go, we lose it. Blame him. And then I put them in later in the game. We still lost. But then he knew, I just said, listen, I had a call. He goes, no, I know I shouldn't have done that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then I put him in later in the game, we still lost. But then he knew, I just said, listen, I had a call.

He goes, no, I know, I shouldn't have done that. So. Just yesterday out of nowhere, a buddy of mine from childhood shows up with his wife in Anaheim. I grab him, we all go hang out. And when we were in rec league, probably middle school, early high school, we played ball in high school and then on the weekends

when they didn't have it, we'd be in a rec league. So we're always playing, you know? Yeah. And my dad would do that shit. Let's go hustle out there, Ryan. And I couldn't be like, shut the fuck up. And one day my buddy's on the other team and he's saying it to him.

He's like, you diving out there, Lam, you diving. And he's like, so shut up you asshole. And you hear the parents in the crowd, you know what I was like, shit. Cause I know now like I wanted to say that, you know, but I know like my dad's Chris lamb is Davis Chris lamb. We call him lamb. He knew he was like, Oh, cause my dad knew him so well. Yeah. He's like, Oh, I fucked fucked up and he's looking at me and I'm like don't look at me, bro I'm not bullshitting you after that shit. My dad was like

Come here. I go what he's like, it's gonna let him fucking say that to me like that I go what do you want me to do? We're like 14, right? Right you go fuck him up It's real like that. I'm like you are You know what? I mean, like he was like fuck over like that to me. I'm like, you are being a asshole, dude. You know what I mean? He was like, fuck, go over there and stomp him. I'm like, nah. Damn.

But he was pissed about it, yeah. Pissed. And I was like, oh my God, yeah. I can't, I don't know. I don't remember seeing a bunch of kids yell back like that back in the day. Really did. My kid is really a nice kid.

He's a good kid. He never gets in trouble, but he just, you know, he hit a nerve. Yeah. Hit it. You know, it just hit a nerve and, you know, because I was frustrated. I'm like, you know, so but he knew what I brought. But I did yank him out. And I remember one time my mom would not come to a lot of my games only because there was six other kids doing other sports.

So she was here by that. And then I remember she came to one of the games and that's the one game I got thrown out of the game for what I slid in the second base and the ump called me out and I thought I was safe and I'm like, I thought I was safe. He's like, you're out. And I go, you suck. He goes out of the game like that. And because he did, but I was like right next to him.

He goes, you're out of the game. So no one knew why he threw me out. Yeah. So I said to my dad, he told my dad what I said and my mom's in the stands. That's the one I had to go sit in the car. She said, you said you, I didn't say you sucked. I said, that was a bad call. And he threw me out.

I had to change it. She was so disappointed. The one game she comes in, I got thrown out. They made you sit in the car, you couldn't even be in the bed. Yeah, I sat in the car. Off the field. Yeah, off the field in the car, in a hot car.

They fit, you know, till he finished the game. Oh, man. So what kind of time did you get with your dad? Did you ever get one on one time? Sometimes, you know, not a lot because it was seven of us. You know, he he'd come home from dinner, come home from work and have dinner. And then he had the New York Post. It was either. Yeah, he would read the New York Post.

Now, sometimes in the morning, though, it was on the weekend. You couldn't talk to him until he had the New York Post. It was either, yeah, he would read the New York Post. Now, sometimes in the morning though, if it was on the weekends, you couldn't talk to him until he was done with the paper. That was his rule? That was his rule. And when he came home, we wanted to read the paper, so we'd just sit there, we'd all eat and we'd talk. We couldn't talk too loud.

So he's around, he's not going off in another room. He's sitting there reading the paper. No, he's sitting there with us having dinner. We all had dinner as a family every night. And then and then he would go up in his room and sit in his easy chair, like his archie bunker, easy chair with the AC cranked and his boxers and his t-shirt, just relaxing. And then if you need to go talk to him, you go upstairs.

Yeah, I want to go talk to that. All right. And one by one, we go in, you know, like, yeah, what's going on? You know, he gives the attention. But, you know, he was tired. I get it. He was worried, you know, and then, yeah, like I said, he would in, you know, like, yeah, what's going on? You know, he gave us the attention, but, you know, he was tired. I get it. He was working, you know, and then, yeah, like I said, he would get off the bus, go, you know, my brothers played little league, so he was coaching constantly. Come, you know, so he was a busy guy. And then my mom was pretty much did all the discipline. And if she needed to talk about stuff, then then she would.

But, you know, and he took me to all sporting events. I was a big, you know, baseball games, you know, and stuff like that. Whatever we like, football, we go to football games. How many kids do you have? I have one. Me too. And her brother, I consider him mine too. But can you imagine seven kids

and trying to get to their goddamn music lessons and sporting event and then taking them to other shit too? Like, you know how you do the play this? We're gonna go watch it. It fucking blows me away that these parents, the good ones, because my mom didn't go to shit. It was easy for her. The way they would work and there's no cell phones.

They remember shit. Where are you writing down that I got practice at 6.30? I would forget everything if I didn't have some kind of reminder in my phone these days. Yeah. I mean, so you gotta be dialed in. And it's tough for me just at the one. Yeah.

My son plays in two basketball leagues. Six more of that. Yeah, so I got to run running around. I got this and I got to bring it up. We got to go to practice. I know I can't imagine. I have to some like moms in my neighborhood. They have three kids and they pull it off. I'm like, how do you pull it off with three? I can't imagine

What seven? So, how did he influence you as a dad? You know he Just being a good dude being a good guy, you know respectful, you know, my mom showed showed how to have a real relationship and, you know, just everybody liked them. Didn't have any problems with anybody. And he was supportive of what you were doing. Even as a young man, like 28 and then we all are in our twenties or fuck ups

and stuff. It took a little while. You know, he's always, he always said, I like pro wrestling. So he'd take me to Madison Square Garden when I was a kid to wrestle in matches. Like WWF back in... Oh yeah. Are you kidding me? Unbelievable. You got the Garden?

What'd you see with him in the Garden? Bruno San Martino, superstar Billy Graham was my favorite. Every month we'd go to the Garden. Yeah. It was amazing. The Garden though, yeah. We'd go to Baltimore Civic Center, you know what I mean? That's where we were.

Superstar Billy Graham won the belt. I went and saw cage matches there with Snooka, and yeah, I'll never forget the Iron Sheik beating Bob Backlund and then Hulkamania and all that, but seeing it at the Garden, it would have must have been insane. I saw Kiss at the Garden when they first came back and put their makeup on. It was their last tour 30 years ago. Yeah.

That first one, when they were like, no, we're doing it for the first time ever. I went and we were like, no, we're going to the garden to see him there. And they booed three 11 off stage. Um, and then that's not a good fit on that. Yeah. Yeah. They boot them out of there. Like what the fuck?

Amber's a color, your energy motherfucker. Where's this guy spitting fire and blood. But so back in, for some reason with the wrestling match at the garden, those guys would bleed cause it wasn't on TV. So if they bled, you had to be over 16 to get in. Oh, is that right? Yeah, so I was like 14 when he was taking me. So my mom used to have these big platform

high heel shoes that she would wear. So I'd wear them. I'd wear my mom's platform shoes and I wore bell bottoms so you couldn't see the shoes. So I looked taller and that's how I'd go to the matches. Cause like, oh, I just did not even gonna ask. Cause you know, my dad wasn't gonna go back. Oh, we can't get in the match.

I go, he's not young enough. Then I gotta get back on the train, go back to New Jersey. So I wore platform high heel shoes to go watch wrestlers. You're watching it. You're not taking them off when you get in there. No, I didn't. No, I just kept them on the whole time. But I had the bell bottoms.

So you had a cover, you had a cover to button the shoe. Yeah. Cause that would look a little weird, you know, if I, but, and that's how I got in at a 14 to go see those great matches. And is it just the two of you going to that? Or was he taking a few of the kids?

Were you the only one into that? Maybe one other brother would go, but it was pretty much us. And did he like it or was that something he was doing for you? He liked it to you. Okay, he did. He liked it too. So, you know, Bruno San Martino was pretty much us. And did he like it or was that something he was doing for you? Okay, he did. He liked it too. So, you know, Bruno San Martino was an Italian guy. So it was all Italians that went to the garden

back in the day. That's why he had the belt that long. Cause Vince McMahon Sr. would say, listen, you know, all we sell out every time because you're Italian. Is that what it was? You can't give up the belt. Yeah, he had it for like nine years. And at one point he goes, listen, I'm done.

I'm done. I'm done. Cause he sold out every time. All Italians would go. I'm done with this show. Yeah, he's like, I can't do it anymore cause it's getting beat up and stuff. So no, my dad was so, you know, with sports, always, you know, whatever equipment,

my mom would be in the backyard. We had like a mound and a plate in our backyard. Oh hell yeah. So always practicing baseball. So they were really evolved sports wise too. All right. And then what, so you're in the middle, 28. So when do you like actually move out? Well, so at 18, you know, after high school,

he wanted to be an accountant. He's like, look. Oh, he wanted you to be an accountant. Yeah, cause that's what he was. You know, so he sent, you know, after high school, he wanted to be an accountant. He's like, look, he wanted you to be an accountant. Yeah, because that's what he was. You know, so he sent me to community college, a local community college. I'm like, I don't know if I want to do this. Look, I'll pay for it. Just go. That's what you need to do. I went one semester. I hated it. And I just went. I remember I went to this room.

I said, listen, I can't do this. I'm not good with numbers. This isn't my thing. But did you know you wanted to do comedy then? I wanted to be on the radio. I wanted to be a DJ. So you wanted to do that. Some kind of radio or TV or acting at that. Now, if you're in the middle, what's there? Three above you. Yeah. So were any of them already accountants or not?

There were both two of them. Well, the real estate account and real estate. And it was one and one of the two, and I didn't want to do either. So I said, listen, I don't want to do this. This isn't my thing. I want to go to this other community college where they had a communications course where you could be on the radio, do some TV projects, an acting class.

He goes, all right, if that's what you want to do, so you sent me over there. So I did that for two years on the radio, did all that stuff. I had my own DJ business. Did that for a while, and then I just kind of like, I did two years, and then I just kind of, I moved down to Florida, because I lived down there for a while when I was younger,

and just messed around for like two or three years. Went out drinking every night with my friends down there, picking up girls, getting drunk, going from job to job. I had 18 jobs in one year. 18? Yeah, 18. I would just work a job for like a week at a construction site, get paid in cash.

And then for two, I wouldn't show up on Monday. And then when the cash ran out, I'd go get another job. So for like two or three years, and then about 24, I go, I gotta get my shit together. What am I doing? I was landscaping, cutting lawns. My dad was definitely disappointed. He's like, what are you doing?

And I came back to Jersey and moved back and I decided I wanted to do standup. And I was like, man, he's not gonna, he's not gonna want me to do this either. He's like, hey, if that's what you wanna do, then go do it. So I started at 25 doing it. Okay.

You know, and, you know, he was totally supportive of it. You know, which- Did he ever get to see you do a set? He did, yeah. So, yeah, first I did an open mic early on. He saw me, I wasn't that good. But then about two and a half, three years in, I was doing comedy three and a half years when he died. So about three years in, I was doing a show.

He was down in Florida, whatever, and he saw me and I did really well. He was really proud. He's like, listen, don't, whatever you do, don't tell your mom you do those kinds of jokes on stage. Oh yeah? Yeah, cause my mom was really proud. He's like, listen, don't whatever you do, don't tell your mom. You do those kind of jokes on stage. Oh, yeah. Yeah, because my mom was really religious. My mom only saw me like, I think, two or three times in my whole career because she was just super.

She didn't want like the curse in and the dirty material. And that's what I do. You know, so she was she hated. I knew she would. I go, I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I don't want to be uncomfortable. You say that. Now, do you think that like comedians like us with the language you use for our moms or grandmoms are like what a daughter in porn or OnlyFans would be like,

you know what I mean? Like, that's important, but I don't want to listen or watch any of that. Probably. You know what I mean? Like, are we that pariah for them on that side? You know what I mean? I think so, because I remember I did like a late night

with Craig Kilborn when he had that late and I did stand up on it and I did like a penis joke and my mom saw it she goes, why would you do that on TV? It's like your young- Like your daughter just put her tits out. Yeah she's like, why you doing that on TV? Your young niece that's 11, saw that.

I go, I don't think, I go, I remember I go, I don't think about my 11 year old niece when I'm writing jokes, I can't. No. I would be out of the business if I did. I go, I don't know if she's gonna like that. I remember she was so disappointed. I go, I told you, don't watch what I do.

You know, it's just better off for both of us. It really is. But my dad liked it, he liked the dirty stuff. So, you know, he saw me and he was like, wow, that was really good. And then I wound up getting on Howard Stern show. My dad was a huge Howard Stern fan. Oh, when you got on before he passed. I got on.

There was a guy in my neighborhood. There was a guy that would go on. He would light his penis on fire. That was his thing. This guy, Vinnie Mazio, Jr., if you know, the Stern show from back in the day, he would get down like a like a little bikini underwear and light a fire over it and cook it like an egg in a frying pan over it and light his penis on fire.

So he's one of those freaks in the Howard Stern show. He was my neighbor. I don't remember him. I used to, so in Maryland, we used to get a DC channel and we would get the Stern channel nine, I want to say. Oh, we had a channel nine Oh, yeah, the Channel 9 show. Yeah. And Uncle Floyd. No, what's the Grandpa Munster?

Oh, Al Lewis. He would come on all the time back in the day and they would do all kinds of wild shit. A Bungos was on back in the day. Yeah, we would see this Channel 9 show and like he was so ahead of his time for doing all that stuff. Yeah, he would all those pay per views like bongos. Yes. And like this guy, Vinny Mazio would come in and light his penis on fire. Yeah. OK. Which, you know, so he was my neighbor.

So we began he started promoting shows. He put me on. So he brought me in studio one time. So I'm doing comedy like two and a half years. I'm on the Howard Stern show. And I remember how we're going. I made a joke about Vinny and they all started laughing. I'm like, oh, man, I made him laugh. And he goes Howard going, I made a joke about Vinnie and they all started laughing. I'm like, oh man, I made him laugh.

And then he goes, Jim, if you want to do anything with your career, let me give you some advice. Get rid of Vinnie Mazzio. You're not gonna go anywhere. I remember him saying that. I remember him saying, you're not going anywhere. Get away from him. But my dad heard that.

He couldn't believe it. He was like, he was so proud. He's like, wow, you want Howard Stern. And then like six months before he passed away, I was on an MTV comedy show. It was a show called Kamikaze. And I got booked on, I was doing comedy like three and a half years.

And I got booked on there and he saw me on TV do stand up. And I had a killer set on there too. So. Yeah. You know, so. So he got to see some real success. He saw some success, yeah. And early too. Early, yeah. You know, even in this business, you know how fast that is. I know, it was success. He saw some success. Yeah. And early, too. Early. Yeah.

Even in this business, you know how fast that is. I know it was. To be on Stern. To be on Stern and then do a TV show for MTV right after that. You know, so. And then, you know, just, you know, one morning I woke up and it was weird because it was a Saturday morning. I used to play softball with my friends on Saturday morning

and I got up like nine or something like that and I just saw like everyone run in the house. Oh, to play softball with my friends on Saturday morning. And I got up at like nine or something like that. And I just saw like everyone running the house. Oh my God, oh my God. And I was like, what's going on? And I went upstairs and my dad was on the bed. He was having a heart attack. My brother was there trying to give him CPR. And then there was a medic there.

I guess the first aid came before the police, or a police officer was there. And it was weird because it was going on for like 30 minutes or 20 minutes or so until the ambulance was there. And it was weird because it was going on for like 30 minutes or 20 minutes or so until the ambulance got there. And I remember I said to my mom, I go, why didn't you wake me up? And she goes, I didn't wanna wake you up.

You know, I don't like waking you up. Because as a comic, I would sleep to like 11 or 12. So hey, don't wake up Jim, don't wake up Jim. Be quiet, he's gotta get asleep because I go to bed at like three, four in the morning. But even for something like that, she was like worried about that. Not that I could have done anything.

I know it was just weird. I'm like, really? So you wake up and it's already, it's been going on. There's already chaos, yeah. It's been going on. It's been going on. I run upstairs and I see he's on the bed.

Was it your mom that saw him first? Yeah, because he was in the bed. They were just hanging in the morning in the bed. They were just hanging around in the room, and then he just all of a sudden is having trouble breathing. So she ran downstairs. I got a couple of my brothers or whatever, and I guess they called 911. And then they started working on him and stuff.

But it was weird because he just went to the doctor like two weeks before, and he like some minor like heart surgery thing. I forget what they did back then. They clogged up. And the doctor goes, Terrible memories right now. He's like, you're good to go. He goes, you're good.

You had a little blockage. He goes, I got it out. And your heart's like, you're 20 years old. That was like 10 days before. It's like, that's awesome. And I, but it's weird because the night before he died, for some reason, my dad left a rose on my mom's pillow. Stop for one second.

You said the magic words, for some reason, right? You've been through this enough. Everything's a little different when it goes down. When you look back, like they let you sleep in. Your dad's leaving a rose on the pillow. You know what I mean? Like, when you go back and you start adding it up, it's like, why did that happen? Why dad? That's different. That doesn't normally, you know what I mean? Like, when you go back and you start adding it up, it's like, why'd that happen?

Why'd that? That's different. That doesn't normally, you know what I mean? Sorry, please keep going. No, I know, you're right. So he leaves the rose on the pillow. And it wasn't, I go to, I said to my mom, I go, did you guys get in a fight? You know, it was the night before.

He goes, no, we just did it. You know, just left it on a pillow for her once she came upstairs or whatever. And then it makes people wonder, like, did he know something? Did he know something? Did he feel something? What, you know?

Yeah, that's weird because he was really happy. He's like, I got a clean bill of health. My heart's like a 20 year old. I'm ready to fucking get seven more kids up in here. Let's get the double digits with the kids. I got a second wind now. My heart's 20 years old, man. Come on, let's go.

I'm like that, I got condoms, I'm fucking out. You know what I mean? You might want to slip one of these on. He's just around now, man. Yeah, I'm like that. You can last longer, too. That's the only reason I wear one. All right, so you're now up the ear awake. You're are you're witnessing this to? Yeah, you are. Yeah, so then the ambulance comes.

The guy's talking at all. Is he breathing? No, he's not. But, you know, they're working on him. And then the ambulance comes. They he talking at all? Is he breathing? No, he's not, but you know, they're working on him. And then the ambulance comes, they go, listen, get out of the room, we're going to work on him. We're going to get, you know. So I didn't think anything. I thought maybe just, you know, had a heart attack, but he's going to be OK.

So OK, follow the ambulance to the hospital. So we're at the hospital, like, all right, they're working on him. It's good. He's at the hospital. They'll fix him. He'll be all right. Is that what they're telling you or is this what good he's at the hospital. They'll fix him. He'll be all right. Is that what they're telling you, or is this what you're thinking? That's what I'm thinking.

OK. Yeah, we're thinking. We're hoping to get him out of there. Because I've been in this situation, too. I wanted to go back for a second. And if you don't mind me asking questions, like the paramedics, when they come in, not that they need to be or anything,

but I just was surprised how they're throwing your shit out of the way to clear a spot. You know, this happened to my grandmother in front of me and she's, I'm giving her mouth to mouth and they're doing the paddles. I never, I don't know, I never saw it in my life before, but watching it on TV and seeing that lifeless body jello like that, it's always given me the creeps.

And now I'm seeing my grandmother shirtless and Just like and you're just like oh what is fucking happening and they're hitting her with the paddles and the body's just doing that I'm like, oh my god, they're throwing chairs out of the way and shit It's just a chaotic fucking time. Well, he was on the bed I remember being on his bed. So they will start working him on the bed. And how big was your house? It was pretty big. He was upstairs, but he already had his shirt off. Okay.

So I don't think it got that chaotic because he was right there. One of your brothers gave him mouth to mouth. Yeah, he was working out. He's giving him sleep and there was a cop there helping. You ever talk to your brother about that? No, I never did. Summer is jam packed and the heat is no joke. So we've got to

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with promo code honeydew. That's M-A-C-K-W-E-L-D-O-N.com promo code honeydew. Now, let's get back to the do. You know, I think he got to him first and then. Would you be able to do that? Which is weird you know what I just about a month ago I go I need to know I need to learn CPR I could be in a situation where I could save somebody and you never know and it's like how do I not know it I look at everything I look at Instagram reels I should know this and I bought one of those AED machines for my house.

What's that one? The defilibrator. If someone has a heart attack, you hook them up and let you know. I should have one of those. It's amazing. Because my brother goes because we have football parties in my house all the time. Joey Diaz is there, of course, too. You better have a couple. So my brother Dan's like, hey, listen, there's a lot of

there's a lot of old guys in our house now. You better have this in the house just in case. And that's that little shock to bring it back for a sec. You hook it right up, and it lets you know if you need to shock them, give them CPR, gives you complete instructions. It's amazing. I'm fucking getting one of these today.

I'm telling you, I went through the whole thing. And I said, I need to notice. I go, why don't I notice? Like, what if someone's choking in front of me? So that, I was about to say, I'm still, like, I have my daughter half the time. So the other half of the time, she in front of me. So that I was about to say, I'm still like, I have my daughter half the time, so the other half of the time she's not with me. And I'm like, what if I fucking choke?

Like I'm, I brag a little bit. I'm five for six saving lives. Really? Yeah. I've saved, my daughter twice has choked and I've Heimliched and got it. Two other people have choked and Heimliched, I've got it. It might be four for five. I can't remember.

My grandma was the one I gave CPR to. Didn't make it, you know what I mean? But I bought one of these self, it's like a fucking, I know about what's about to happen on the internet with this, but it's like a self, almost like a plunger. And you put, if you're choking, instead of trying to get yourself over a chair or whatever, you can grab this thing and pump up and suck that thing fucking out of your real. Yeah. I'm going to have to, I'm going to give it. I gave one to my daughter's mother.

I was like, cause she doesn't know how to do it. My daughter was choking in front of us. She had gotten up and walked away from the table and I just thought she was going to the restroom or something She comes back. She's like and I look over and like oh my god You're not breathing and her mom just looked at me like what are you gonna do? You know, I don't know what to do. I got up and I started giving her a high like boom. That shit flew out Really? Yeah one time was a pizza cheese like a clump of it stuck down there. It's just gathered up I got that to come out. Another time, I've told this story,

but I was working as a writer, and I had an editor sitting in front of me. So I'm sitting just like I am facing you, you're facing that way, your monitor. And I see him sort of doing this, and I'm like, what are you laughing at up there? And I'm here, I'm going, oh, and then he's doing it, and when he turns around, he gives me this,

and I'm like, oh shit, and I jumped over, and I get him the high like everything shoots out. I'm like, holy fuck, dude He's like you saved my life. I'm like, yeah, and he goes don't tell anybody I was like, I'm telling You're going to my stats bro, I'm telling everybody Yeah, man, it's fucking that's a. It's it's just also like it's what who you are. Do you freeze in that moment or are you going to fucking power through this and block out that this is my dad who might be dying? And I got to put my mouth on this man and try to save his fucking life. No, I know. I know.

And I really like a month ago, I really said I need to notice shit just in case I'm in this situation, wherever I am, if it's a stranger or whatever. But I need to notice because how stupid would it be if I didn't know it? Yeah. Like I've been in that situation. Well, I don't know what to do. I go to YouTube, but I just watch videos on it. So I already know. I know exactly what to do. I watch 10 videos. It's two hours.

The difference is, you know, I have that certification or some shit. Yeah, exactly. But anyway, go back to the hospital. So we go there and they go, okay, they're working on them. So we're all just hanging out like, okay, this sucks, but he's going to be okay. I never thought he was going to die. You didn't. No, I thought they were going to get him back to life or whatever. Maybe he was alive when they took him out of the house. And then the doctors, hey, you guys want to come in this room, they bring in like a special, like a family room to break it to you.

Like they don't come out in the waiting room where all the other people, they move you into a room. And I was like, this isn't good. And I didn't even know, because I've never been in that situation before. And then they bring in a doctor says, hey, sorry, we tried everything, but they said he was dead right away.

Like, you know, we he wasn't even on his bed. Yeah, even the first couple of minutes he was out that he was done. And there's no what they had no shot. How's that? It was rough, man, because I was like, you know, I had some older aunts and uncles, you know, that lived down in Florida. And I kind of knew they died. You know, those were rough. But this was, you know, the first time,

you know, something really close to home. And you just don't think you're going to lose your dad at 58. Yeah, that's a young age. I know you when you said you lost your dad at 42. That's insane. Yeah. When I finally outlived him, I couldn't believe even now. Is that weird? Oh, when I was getting 59, when I got to 50, I was worried about that age 58. I'm like, holy shit, that's when my dad died.

Like it was in the back of my mind that whole year. It wasn't in the back, bro. That was way more in the front. Yeah, it was weird. You can't help it. I know. It's a number that's been burned in your head since you were 28.

That like, holy shit. Look, I'm not even exaggerating. This is what was really wild. My dad at 42, right? At 42, right at 42 I end up I get kidney stones and I'm bedridden for like three days What I end up clotting my legs clock completely both of and I'm like what the fuck's going on all it took six months They thought I had cancer long ass story short. It turns out I've got a blood disorder and

that Then we all got to get tested. I'm the only one in the family that got my mother doesn't have it. So they're like, your father gave this to you. So that many years later, I find out that a heart attack didn't really kill him. This shit killed him. He clotted and died. I'm in my bed at 42.

I'm fucking clotting. They sent me home from the hospital and tell me you're okay. I'm not. I full fucking clotting. They sent me home from the hospital and told me, you're okay. I'm not. I full on clot. And I'm telling you this, inches away from carbon copy of what happened to him that night and how he died. Carbon copy at the exact same fucking age. The same age.

But this time, this person, I get lucky, I beat it. And then I get the education and find out, okay, this is what this is. So even now, that's why I clotted in the hospital last year, and even now I gotta get my daughter tested, and fingers crossed she doesn't have this bullshit, because with women or females, if she wants to get on birth control,

that can cause clots, she can't be on this shit. If she's in an accident or pregnant and needs to be on bed rest, she's got to know that she needs to be on some kind of blood thinner or something or else she'll clot and die. It's the same thing. You're saying that at that age. It's exactly what happened to me. I found out whatever. I was 16 at the time. So what? 26 years later, I find out not only what, and I've had this my whole life, it's a genetic thing, and you just don't know it unless it comes up, you know what I mean? You could live a healthy 102 with this bullshit

and never even know you had it, but if you ever have to slow your machine down, that's when that shit's coming to get you. So, but they thought he died of a heart attack though? Yeah, so originally he had gone to the doctor and had a heart attack. I took him. I drove him to his checkup. And they're like, you're having a heart attack now, which again, is 16. I thought a heart attack was the moment you clutch, you know.

But they're they're now educating us and say, no, the pain and the you're having a heart attack. That that's the end of the fucking heart attack. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. So I drive him over to the hospital. They admit him. He's in there for days.

And they release him at Thanksgiving. We stay local because he was at Hopkins and Baltimore. So we go to my aunt's. We stay in Highland town for the Thanksgiving weekend. Then we go home Monday. And they tell him, you have blood clots, but you're okay to leave. I'm you have blood clots, but you're, you're okay to leave. I, I'm released with blood clots. I was terrified to go to sleep. I was terrified to go to sleep.

Right. You know, like my dad went to bed, never fucking woke up. So, um, yeah, he, he ends up going and they think all he died. Cause what the doctors are telling me now is that back then, and I know it doesn't, we're like, what do you mean back then? But in the 80s, anyone that died like in their 40s or under, they just said heart attack. Now they're realizing with all the new equipment that a lot of these things are clots and things like that.

Right. And that's why the young people, it's not like all you had a bad ticker, they're just throwing it in that category, you know? But now they're like, oh, it's not like, oh, he had a bad ticker. They're just throwing it in that category, you know? But now they're like, oh, it's different, you know? So yeah, forever it was heart attack, and then they're like, it's actually was this. Yeah, yeah, wow.

I'm like, damn, took me to almost die to figure that shit out. At the exact same age, that was the thing, the age. That's crazy, man. I, you know, I always won, you know, you lost, I always like, man, I got gypped out of years of my dad dying. You know, I was 28. You had 16. I mean, we know Joey Diaz, his mom.

He was what? Six, seven, something like that. Or his dad. And there's those those mom. We was in high school. His dad was the young. Yeah, but he was like 14 or 15. Yeah. I mean, it's just that's you're not supposed to lose a parent that young. No. You know, and I always think about my kid. You know, I have my kid later in life. I'm like, listen, I'm, it's just that's you're not supposed to lose a parent that young. No, you know, when I always stick it out with my kid, you know, I have my kid later in life.

I'm like, listen, I'm going to be around. I'm hoping to live to 80. Yeah. I tell him I go, so you'll be 34. Is that good? I tell him that all the time. I figure I could go to 80. Is that all right? You have me for 34 years. I do that math to all the time. If I can get to 80, my daughter will be another, well, yeah, 30 more years.

So I think he'll be set in life. You'll probably have kids, you'll be all right. Yeah, I'll have a kid or two at 34 maybe, he'll be married, live in the suburbs, have whatever job he's gonna do. Yeah, so I'm like, are you good? Yeah. You know, that's what I'm hoping, 80,

but maybe it could be 85, I don't know, but you know. So I always worry about that, I'm like, I want to be around, you know, I want to make sure that, you know, he has his dad for a while. How old was the youngest sibling when your dad died? If you're 28, how old would the youngest be? Teens? Are they young? Are they still high school? He was, uh, probably 20. Okay. So still just right out of high school. That's young. Yeah. You had eight more years. Okay. So still just right out of high school. That's young.

You had eight more years. Yeah. And how old's the oldest? How much more? How many more years did the oldest sibling get? He's four years old, five years older than me. Oh yeah, it's when it was in the bang, bang, bang zone. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. Yeah. All right. So what do you remember about that? How did your mom take it? How did she react? I mean, that's you know, my mom's super religious, so, you know, they can work it out in their mind.

You know, Catholic. Yeah, of course, she was sad and missed them and stuff, but she just, you know, she never dated after that. No, no, never even wanted. They didn't even think about it. Never had a friend in the neighborhood. Nothing, nothing. No. You know, but she, you know, for somehow they can work it out.

You know, OK, he's up in heaven. This is his time to go. I don't know what my time is going to go. All of that stuff. You know, they're really good with dealing with it, you know, whatever they believe in and stuff. So, you know, it's just weird because then he all of a sudden he wasn't around, you know, and

I made sure because I was living at home at the time. So, you know, when I when I first started doing comedy, my dad's like, well, maybe I said, I don't know how I'm going to do this. I'm not going to make that much money goes, we'll move back in. I'll just pay minor a little rent here. He had a good dad. Yeah. So he had me move back in the house. Yeah, I know. Because he knew I said, listen, it's going to be tough.

And this is what I want to do. When did you realize you had a really good dad? Like, at what point does it hit you like, damn, he's going to be tough and this is what I want to do. I read. When did you realize you had a really good dad? Like at what point does it hit you like, damn, he's a good fucking dad. I think, you know, probably at like 12, 13, 14. Really that young? Yeah, I just because he was involved in my life, you know, with coaching my teams. But I mean, when after he passed, I'm sorry, specifically like, do you check yourself now? Like, I still think when I'm driving to my daughter's dance class,

something like, how the fuck did my dad come to all these damn practices and all these games? And I think at some points, maybe I had a little anger when I was younger that he didn't give me enough attention, but there was seven kids. So you thought that, you know, but what was he going to do? You know, he had to go to work and take care of the family, you know, provide for the family. So I had that always that little resentment there. And then when I had a kid, I realized that I go, you real I go. He was an amazing dad.

Like until you have a kid, you don't realize how chaotic and how much time that takes. I can't imagine. I had two brothers, two more of me. I don't know how to find he had twins. I'm a twin. 1973. Right. I had a fucking been like deuces. I am out here in the 70s. You could have done that. Yeah. I'm like, you stuck around and then had another one. Yeah.

Yeah. So but, you know, so I think that I had that. And then when I had my kid later on, I realized like, wow, he was an amazing dad. Yeah. You know, you can only give your kids so much time, you know, what seven of them even what one You know, I feel like I got it. I got to try to give him as much time as I can You know, so but yeah, but he had so I was living that so I stayed living at the house for another two years Because my mom was still there was probably like three or four of us still living there You help your mom out of seven. Yeah help there just made sure she was in the house by herself

Yeah, you know, I wanted to start moving on sure she was in the house by herself. Yeah. You know, I wanted to start moving on. I was starting to make a little money and move out eventually, but I stayed an extra two years. You know, and then we wanted to move her out of the house where he died and we put her in a condo. Now this is, I mean, my dad didn't have any of this either,

but did you guys have a will? Was there any of that stuff? Or? Yeah, he had a will. He did. Yeah, he had a will, yeah. Yeah, my dad wasn't doing any of that stuff? Or? Yeah, he had a will. He did. Yeah, he had a will, yeah. Yeah, my dad wasn't doing any of that. No.

We had none of, no. Now I went and got a living will and trust and all because I watched how a will went through. He had a will, but I watched how it went through court and who all took it. You know what I mean? Everyone know that there was nothing that rolled our way in the end.

So I see like the value of that, but he didn't have life insurance, at least that we were told, you know what I'm saying? I'm 16. And that's when also, at least in, I know my family from sitting here and talking to people, a lot of people's family, when a patriarch or a matriarch,

whether that's a father, mother, grandma, they die, man, the scumbags come out of the woodwork. You know what I mean? You didn't have any of that, no sisters or brothers on the other side. No, everything was- Popping up. No, it wasn't a lot left, I think, because he quit his job and then he started like this catering business down in Florida. Oh, really?

Yeah. Like in the middle of his job, he just decided he wanted to buy like these lunch trucks and they go to construction sites, you know, and stuff like that. For some reason, mom lived down there. His brother lived down there. So we moved to Florida between my, uh, sophomore and junior year. We just picked up and left and he wanted to do this business down in Florida, completely failed. So he was back to like, he was broke for a while. Like he lost all his money. He was working like these, these, these menial jobs, you know, towards the end. You know, gotten to some real estate, but the real estate wasn't good at the time.

My brothers were into it. So he didn't have much when when he passed away, he took a chance. And I, you know, at the time, it's like, you know, he had balls to do that because I'm just leaving this. I want to try. I think seven kids. Yeah. Seven kids. Yeah. Something he knows is steady and dependent. Yeah. Yeah. So but so there wasn't a lot left when he passed away,

but we made sure we took care of our mom, we bought her a truck, we all made the payments on it each month. We worked out a whole thing between all the kids to make sure she was comfortable afterwards. Okay. What about, did he, were his parents, your grandparents, were they alive as well? His mom was still alive, yeah. What were they parents, your grandparents, were they alive as well?

His mom was still alive. Yeah. What were they like, where'd he get that from? He's a romantic, he's a hustler, he's a hard worker, he's a family man, like where, what, was it his father? I never met his father, his father died, you know, there was no, there was nobody- But he never told you about him or anything like that?

Not really, there was nobody on the male side of my family that lived past 60. Shit. For a while. Are you, what'd you say you are? Yeah, 59, no, but now his brother is still alive and he's like 74. All right, all right, all right.

But he was the first one. My brothers are in their 60s now too. But it was crazy, so like holy shit. Yeah. So everyone, the males on that side, the heart disease and stuff. So but I don't know where he got it from. I'm not sure.

What was your grandma like, his mom? She was great. Yeah. Yeah. She was active in your lives and stuff like that. Yeah, she had a condo right on the beach in Fort Lauderdale. So we'd go down there on vacation every year. We'd stay there, go there for one or two weeks, and it was great. They had a pool, then the beach is right there.

You're in southern Florida and stuff. So that's where we always took our vacation. So we were really close with her. And then she wound up moving up to New Jersey later in her life. My mom took care of her. She moved in the house. She wasn't doing well and stuff. Your mom took care of her too? Oh, yeah. My mom took care of her too? Oh yeah, my mom took care of another aunt too. She was full on caretaker. Yeah, she was full. Another aunt, like one of her sisters? Yeah, one of her sisters lived there.

Yeah, my mom would take people in, that's what she did. We had friends growing up, the mom went into a mental institute, she took the three kids in, now there was 10 living in our house at one point. No, really? Yeah. And she'd take care of them,

they'd all go to, what are these classmates of yours or something? Yeah, they were in the schools in the area. Yeah. But they weren't buddies of yours? Yeah, they were. But they were our friends. Yeah, we were friends with the family and stuff.

And she's like, you guys need a place to stay. This is a spa. I would have been one of those kids. Your mom would have, for sure. I never had any, yeah. Yeah, so she told us, I'm going over to 14th moms house. She's a good cook.

What's that? I said, I'm going over to 14th moms house. She's a good cook. Oh yeah, yeah. So, man, 10. Yeah, yeah. And then her mother-in-law, and that's right? Yep.

After, so did your, so wait, so then your grandmom outlived her son. Yeah. Man, you ever talked to her about that? It was rough, man. I remember when she- Because these are Italian women, aren't they? Yeah, yeah. I remember.

I remember when she came off the plane and was just sobbing for two straight hours. I'm not supposed to lose a son. I'm supposed to go first. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I watched that, too.

And then we end up living with our grandmom. And I've talked about this that too. And then we ended up living with our grandmom. And I've talked about this too, like everything changed. The smell, that magic sauce and garlic, like the way my grandmom's house smelled, the moment we moved in, it was gone. You're used to it, you're there every day. You don't smell that anymore. Like you did, like, oh my God,

grandma's house has a smell, you know? And she would sit and cry on the couch or sit in her little rocker and so attached. She'd be like, oh, oh my son, we're never gonna see him again. Have you had anything to eat today, hon? Like bam, like that. And we're like, grandma, stop that bullshit.

And, you know, I would always argue with her, like, let him rest in peace, you know, that's my father. And now that I have a kid, man, I would have told my daughter's kid, you shut the fuck up, you little motherfucker, you know what I mean? But she would say things like, oh, he's never gonna come up the hill again.

And I would, now, you know, I see that with my kid, like I can't imagine they won't ever do this again. I'm like, that poor fucking lady. And then she died not, I don't know, three years after that, not even. She couldn't take that shit anymore. That was the whole thing. And she didn't drive.

So when we told her, we had to be careful not to tell her he was dead, the whole situation, because she was trapped and she couldn't drive. So she just once they told her she just started screaming across the street to neighbors like, can you take me? Can you take me? And she couldn't come. Wow. Yeah. And then we got there. And I remember not her only being the crying like you're talking about, but also being pissed, pissed. I don't know who called her first and said he was still alive, but he was not. Oh, yeah, right.

He was not still alive. You know, in those situations, you don't know what to do. He was not still alive. Should I tell this person not to look? My mom didn't want to wake me up. You know, that's just a, you know, when you just go, that's weird. Yeah.

You know, because you're like, don't wake him up because he sleeps in, or whatever like that. So just those situa, whoever called called said, no, he's still alive. I think one of my aunts that wasn't blood called it was like, you know, and then she was like, I've always hated you. You know, that kind of shit. Yeah.

But then you see, we saw the fucking scumbags come out of the woodworks, people you loved all your life who thought they were so good. And next thing you know, they're shutting your grandmother's door and locking it and all the jewelry's in a trash bag. You're like, hey, what's going on out the house real quick? And next thing you know, you're getting kicked out of the house. You're like, what the fuck's going on here? Yeah. Yeah, we're lucky we didn't have that.

I went through that with an ex-girlfriend, with her family, that whole chaos. Yeah, I remember you tell that stuff. You know, they wanted this, all this stuff. Right. So, but thank God it didn't happen. And even my mother's mother, later on, she passed away, and no one went crazy. There was a whole thing about what you want.

She had an antique table from like 1954, forks from the 60s, these special whatever these. And the only thing I table from like 1954, you know, forks from the 60s, you know, any special, whatever these. And the only thing I wanted from my grandmother, she had this handicap placard for a car. And that's the only thing I took because it never expired. That's your family heirloom. Yeah, I said, that's all I want.

I don't care about the forks from, you know, when Kennedy got shot, you bought it the next day. I don't give a shit about that because, you know, when Kennedy got shot, you bought it the next day. I don't give a shit about that. Cause I only use it when I go to concerts. I park right in the front in a handicap. Yeah, so that's the only time I still have it. Thank you grandma.

Yeah. Do you still have that? Of course. How old is it now? It's gotta be 20 years old. And I hide it in my car just in case a ballet guy tries to steal it. Yeah, that definitely would've steal those. Yeah, so I stick it like under car just in case a ballet guy tries to steal it. Yeah, that definitely would've steal it.

Yeah, so I stick it under the seat under a mat. But that thing, and that's the only thing I took. I said, that's all I want. You can have everything else. That's good. Do you remember your dad's funeral? Do you remember the day going and stuff? What was that like?

Was it a very Catholic, was it an open casket viewing? It was an open casket, yeah. Like before and... You know, I think it was might've been... Yeah, it was one day, like, you know, two to four in the afternoon and seven to nine at night. A lot of comedian friends of mine came down. That's nice.

You know, came to the funeral, you know, and then the next morning was the funeral mass. I remember, though, before... I think that night after it was over, you know, it was open casket. I put a New York Post in his casket because he loved reading that paper. So I put that one in, you know, that, you know, whatever the day was before he was born. I'm like, let me put that in there in his casket.

And then they had the funeral and he got married, you know, close by. His his cemetery is his plot is like two miles from my house. My mom, my dad, my grandmother, my two grandmothers, my uncle. Yet are all there. So I still go by. Yeah. I go by a lot. Yeah. I bring my kid. That's one thing I wish I could go. Every time I go back, I go by. I don't it's not even it's out of the way. And I go right the fuck out of the way every time.

You know what I mean? It's nice. Yeah. I wish I could go more. Yeah, I mean, it's easy. It's like two miles from my house, but I'll go, you know, I'll go probably six times a year. I bring my kid there. We tell them stories. You know, it's my birthday's anniversaries or that stuff. You know, that's nice. Yeah. I got a picture of my daughter sitting on the headstone, but I don't I don't make it public. Because it's kind of dark. You know what I mean?

But I gotta fix whoever's sitting on that motherfucker. Yeah. I'm like, get over there. I gotta tell my son, because I think I figured out what they wrote on my dad, you know, his great husband, father, you know, grandfather. He was special in this world, you know. And my son's reading, he's like, oh, that's cool.

He's like, what do you want on your, you want anything written on yours? And I go, and I remember I said, Yeah, he always he was a big fan of farts. He's like, really? That's what I go. Yes, I want I got to tell him I don't want that. He will. He will fight for it. He was no, that's what he told me. So put it on there. Bob, I'm telling you, that's what he said. I don't know what I want if I want anything. You know, one of my faves is Rodney.

You know what's on Rodney Dangerfield's headstone? No. It's there goes the neighborhood. Oh, really? Oh, that's great. Isn't it? There goes the fucking neighborhood. Rodney's moving in.

Maybe I'll just plug my website. Go to JimFloherty.com. I got a whole warehouse of material, please. Let my kid go to college. So your mom, after your dad passes away, how much longer does she? Is she still alive? She passed away like 2018.

18. She lived to 80. She got to 80. Yeah. And how was, I mean, she never dated again. So she waited 25 more years she lived after. 25. And never dated again?

Never? Did she have girlfriends? She go play bingo or travel, Atlantic City, do anything? Oh, more with the family and stuff. Yeah, she had some friends and stuff. So she wasn't house-ridden, always taking care of people. People would get her out. Oh, yeah.

And then plus the grandkids. There's 14 grandkids. Oh, shit. So she loved spending time with them. They would sleep over, please. You know, she was a huge help when I, when I had my son, you know, I'll take them, please. You know, so she would always be over there to babysit, send out the pay for a babysitter. So she loved the grandkids spent a ton of time with the grandkids and we'd

always take her on trips to Atlantic city. We take her on, you know, vacations. My brother would take her to vacation, Hawaii. We bring her down to Florida, all that stuff. So... Do you see any of you, uh, are your dad and you now? Um, and I want to ask too, so I don't forget, but what about your son? You see anything about your dad and your son?

No, I don't think so. No. And as far as me, um, yeah like, you know, you got to sacrifice for your kid, you got to be around, you know, when I got divorced, I said, listen, I got to be in this kid's life and I want to be around. I miss you. Like he's got a baseball basketball game today. I hate that I'm missing it. Yeah. But I got no choice. I go, listen, this is I'm building, you'm building a future for you, so you're gonna be well off,

so you can buy a house and do all this stuff. So that's why I'm there. He understands, he's got a million games going on, but I hate missing every one of them. Me too, I miss the ones like a Saturday I don't have or I'm out on the road. So I miss that soccer game. Right, like you're in a hotel just waiting for a show

and you're like, I could be at the soccer game,, this sucks because. You know what they're starting to do now though? They got this app called Mojo. I'm not paid by Mojo. They use it for my kids soccer. You pay, I don't know, whatever a year. And then as long as a parent there will turn their phone on and live stream the game, you can watch it. So you could theoretically just put an iPhone on the sideline of that basketball game and then you could watch it from wherever you are and then you don't have to fucking miss anymore. There was a place that he used to play out there. You'd signed up for like $10 a month and they would, they watch,

so I could watch the games, but that place, they don't play in there anymore. But I didn't hear about that. That's good to know. But yeah, so, you know, but what am I going to do? I got to, you got to work too. My dad works. So he missed out to work. You can. But yeah. So, you know, but what am I going to do? I got to you got to work to my dad work. So he missed out. You can't. Yeah. You can't be with your kid every fucking second of the day. And at some point, they don't want you. He's a he's a teenager now. So he's got his own. Yeah. My daughter's nine and already started where I can't even hold her hand

like around the corner. Oh, yeah. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. From the school. So I'm like, I can't what? You know, so I put arm around her or whatever. I try to do. I treat her honestly like my dad did me as a boy, like would embarrass me a little bit and stuff like that. Yeah. Do that with her all the time.

Yeah, like, you know, I the bus stop is right out front of my house. I'd always go out there in the morning. And this year is like, Dad, don't come out here anymore. Oh, good. You know, because the other parents would come outside to hang out with the other parents. We'd catch up or whatever like that. He's like, you don't't come out here anymore. I'm good. You know, cause the other parents would come out so I'd hang out with the other parents. We'd catch up or whatever like that. He's like, you don't need to come out anymore.

I go off that one parent comes out, I'm coming out cause we hang out and talk. But so he doesn't want me out there anymore, which I understand. Yeah, but fast. Yeah, it does. And then, you know, when they want to go hang out with their friends, like, you know, you got,

I got my kid half the week. So it's like, I want to spend time with him, but then he also wants to be with his friends. I'm not going to tell him, no. Yeah, that's what the whole thing is. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's tough because you feel like, oh man, not that you want to just isolate them, but you want to spend time with them. But then it's like, dad, my friends, can I please, can you drive me over? And of course, it's tough for me to remember. Yeah, no, it's tough for me to remember too.

I know the value of, especially now, of time with my dad, because I only got 16 years. And you really think of 16 years, like first what? Three years, you don't remember shit anyway. You know what I mean? So you really get this 13 year window of memories and stuff. And then I gotta remember my bullshit in hers. You know what I mean? I can't keep this kid and do all these things with her from her

friends and stuff just because I want these memories. It's just, and then the way it goes, you gotta let them go and do their thing. Yeah. Yeah. Because I know like once he's 18, he goes to college, who knows who he's going to go away or whatever, you know, and then it's going to be, I'm not going to have them until he comes home for Christmas break or Easter and then the summer. And so you go like long enough. I got five years left where we hang out. We watch movies every night.

I cook them dinner. We'll watch a movie, watch some sports. He likes the same teams as I like, which is great. I take him to games all the time. It's like my dad did. I took him to wrestling for a while when he but he's not into it anymore. But whatever. Yeah. Whenever all a lot of sporting events, he loves that. So, you know, because I knew remember just remember my dad doing it. Yeah.

And it helps that he likes the same teams as me. Yeah, I'm not taking any of this unless my team is playing your team. We ain't going. Well, I told my son, I go, listen, you can root for any team. I'll watch the games. We there's two teams you can't root for in sports, the Jets, the New York Jets and the New York Mets, because they're both loser organizations and you're going to be miserable the rest of your life.

I got a lot of friends that are Jets and Met fans. I go, you can't pick those two teams. So I'm not sitting through that. And he picked the teams that I like. He likes the Dolphins in football and the San Francisco Giants in baseball. So it's great. So we bond over that. We go to games all the time.

Yeah, we're having a bit of a renaissance in Baltimore. So my daughter's getting to see good Oriole teams, not the shit show that's been. It took her 20 years. I know. Longer than that. I mean, she's getting to see that and the Ravens right now.

She's getting to see players like Lamar and stuff. So it's pretty cool. Yeah, it's fun. Good for you, dude. I'm happy for you, man. Thank you for coming and doing this. Yeah, of course, absolutely. Promote everything one more time Yeah, it's fun. Good for you, dude. I'm happy for you, man. Thank you for coming and doing this. Yeah, of course, absolutely. Promote everything one more time again, please, Jim.

I got a podcast, Everybody's Awful comes out every Monday. My tour date's jimflorentine.com. I got a couple specials out, the Amazon Prime, and a couple of them on Tubi TV. All right. So you can catch them there. All right. Thank you guys, as always.

I am RyanSickler.com. Ryan Ryan sickler all social media come see me live Support the way back and thank you guys. We will talk to you all next week You