The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Jodie Sweetin - JodieDew

Episode Date: June 24, 2024

My Honeydew this week is Jodie Sweetin! You know her from Full House and Fuller House, but you can also catch her on her own podcast, “How Rude, Tanneritos.” Jodie returns to Highlight the Lowlights of her journey going into perimenopause, opening up about what it has been like to experience such confusing changes from her late 30’s to now. If going through a second puberty (that you didn’t know about) wasn’t hard enough, we also discuss the complexities of it lining up with your children going through their own changes. From throwing plastic lemons to crying over squirrels, Jodie shares some of the raw moments perimenopause has brought on, and how it’s teaching her to embrace the changes that come in this season of her life. SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://youtube.com/@rsickler SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! You now get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! Sign up for a year and get a month free! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew What’s your story?? Submit at [e-mail] CATCH ME ON TOUR https://www.ryansickler.com/tour Get Your HoneyDew Gear Today! https://shop.ryansickler.com/ Ringtones Are Available Now! https://www.apple.com/itunes/ http://ryansickler.com/ https://thehoneydewpodcast.com/ SUBSCRIBE TO THE CRABFEAST PODCAST https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-crabfeast-with-ryan-sickler-and-jay-larson/id1452403187 SPONSORS: Seed -Support your gut this summer with Seed’s DS-01® Daily Synbiotic. Go to https://www.Seed.com/HONEYDEW and use code 25HONEYDEW to get 25% off your first month. Liquid I.V. -Get 20% off your order when you shop better hydration at https://www.LiquidIV.com and use code HONEYDEW The Farmer’s Dog -Get 50% off your first box plus free shipping when you go to https://www.TheFarmersDog.com/HONEYDEW

What's up, everybody? Ryan Sickler here. And I just wanted to let you know that tickets to my fall dates of the Live and Alive tour are on sale now. Go to Ryan sickler dot com. Get your tickets to all shows. I'm coming to Austin, Dallas, La Jolla, Salt Lake City, Denver, Chicago, Detroit, Minneapolis, Madison, Portland, Fort Lauderdale, Tampa, and Tempe. Tickets for all shows are available right now

on my website at RyanSickler.com. The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler. ["The Honeydew with Ryan Sickler"] Welcome back to the honeydew, y'all. We're over here doing it in the Night Pants Studio. I am Ryan Sickler, RyanSickler.com and Ryan Sickler on all your social media. I'm going to start this episode like I start them all by saying thank you. Thank you. Look, for whatever you do, in any way you support me. Thank you very much.

Whether it's this show, whether it's the way back, come see me on tour. Tickets are available on my website at RyanCicler.com or the Patreon. The Patreon, look, I'm very lucky and grateful that you guys support what I do and I'm able to just do this for a living and talking to you regular stories. The Honeydew with you all is the wildest thing on Patreon. I promise you, there's no one that has stories like you guys. It's been $5 a month since we started a few years ago and it's still five bucks a month. It's not getting raised. I want to hear your stories. If you have a story that has to be heard, please submit it to honeydewpodcast.gmail.com. All right. That's the biz. You know what we do here. We highlight low lights and I always say these are the stories behind the storytellers. I am very excited to have

this guest back on the Honeydew. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Jodie Sweeten. Welcome. Hey, thank you so much for having me back. Thank you for coming back. And a little rhythm section, I appreciate that. Look, I told you, I appreciate you right now. I'm king shit in my house right now. I've got a third grader who can't, you know, sometimes is like, whatever, dad, I'm not cool, you know, which is fine.

Well, you're not gonna be cool for a very long time. Look, I believe that you really like, go ahead and humble me. Like, she shits on me in ways like like when I'm about to go do a show, she'll be like you're wearing that. I'm like, what's the matter with it? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Now, my kids are just like, yeah. Yeah. They'll be say they'll say something funny. I'm like, huh? You get it from your mom and

they're like, yeah, you're not funny. Yeah. That's not or I say something that is funny and they're like, that's so lame. Yeah, that's what I get. I get that. Cool thanks guys. Yeah I get that all the time but I told you young you and pretty current you are on my tv. Well good. And tablets non-fucking stop and they just I'm the king of third grade right now at her school because they're all like you yeah, I waited a long time for this. I waited a long time, yeah, damn it. And they're all like, you know, Jody, sweetie,

you know, Jody, sweetie. Yeah, that's very cute. And then the next question is, you know, do you know uncle Jesse? I'm like, no, I don't know him. I know Jody, but you're number one over there. Well, I'm like the six, like six degrees of John Stamos. You know what I mean?

So. You're the top top. So thank you. Well, thank you. Absolutely. Thank you, right now I mean? So you're the top top. So thank you. Absolutely. Right now, I reign supreme in my home because of you. Well, at least somebody does because I certainly don't in mine. We've got 16 and 13 year old girls and being me gets me nothing in my house. So yeah, we're going to dive into all of it before we do, please promote everything you'd like.

You can follow me on Instagram at Jody Sweeten. That's where I post a lot of stuff for all of my comedy and movies and all that kind of fun stuff. And yeah, that's what I got going on right now. Just got back from Canada working for a few weeks. So that's great. Yeah. Yeah. I love that you're staying busy. Yeah. But you're also going through some life changes as you're staying busy.

And you mentioned it when I was like, what should we talk about today? And you're like this. And I was like, you know what? It's a great thing because we're going to talk about perimenopause. Yes. For a little bit, at least. Well, I listen, I want to say this. I know we have a predominantly male audience, but I'm telling you 100% you need to know about this as well. Yes. Yes. And I am absolutely no expert, but I will, you're an expert on what's going on with me.

And I will say like I'm 42 now and I am not the person that I was at 35. And it's, it's crazy. And it started because we were talking about our kids and stuff like that. And I said, you know, I really, the worst of my older daughter, who's now 16, her like peak, just awful, hormonal, bitchy, middle school era

like coincided just perfectly dovetailed with the pandemic. And what I realized in hindsight was that it also really coincided with the start of my like perimenopausal changes. And most people think like, oh menopause, like you're 55 and you're older. Hot flashes. That's all I,

That's all right. all I, it starts. You no longer have a period, you get hot flashes and you're irritable. Right, that's menopause. Menopause is when it's all done. It's also a top line of menopause. Exactly, well the crazy thing is, is all the research now, like they're finally

doing research, there has been like no research done on this as usual, cause you know, we're women. But chances are if you are a dude or anyone around women in their late thirties, forties, early fifties. You all. You, you, everyone. You are dealing with someone who is going through a second puberty that no one has told you is coming.

Ooh, a second puberty, that's well said. It is wild. I am very fortunate, my OBGYN, Dr. Suzanne Gilbert-Lenz is an expert on this, she's written a book on it, which I just bought and I have to read. But nobody tells you that this is coming and it's really fucked because your kids are usually teenagers at this time, so they're going through their own hormonal journey and everyone kind of expects like, oh, they're psychos and they're going through and they just don't, they can't

control themselves. What no one tells you is that if you are a female at this point in your life, you're also going through the most wild hormonal changes of your life, but nobody's telling you that they're going on or warning you that they're coming. So you're just like, I think I've lost it. So that's just what I wanna ask you. What makes you specifically, you noticed it.

I- And so instead of just being like, well, this is who I am now, what makes you say, whoa, this is, you know what I'm saying? Like the difference where you're like, wow, I noticed this. What I noticed was, and it was also,

the pandemic sort of masked a lot, right? Cause we were all kind of collectively losing our shit. So it was very hard to be like, oh, that's what's going on. But now that I look back, I'm like, oh, no, I started getting really regular migraines, like at certain times of in the month. That's a thing too. That is definitely a thing. The change in hormones like affects and you get migraines usually like around the beginning

or end of your cycle. And so I started getting those regularly. I was so irritable and I was not one of those women who really ever like noticed big hormonal flow. I was like, yeah, whatever. I, when I tell you I became a complete psycho, I threw a plastic lemon at the wall at one point because I got so pissed and my kids now joke about it and they wrote, they call it the angry lemon. It's still in the house. It's still in the house, it's in a little bowl

on the counter and they wrote T-A-L on it and it's Tal, the angry lemon. I didn't even know that they had made fun of me about it for like a year. Oh, that's great. And they were like, oh, it's the angry lemon. I was like, what? And they were like, look on the bottom of it. And they wrote on it and I was like, what? And they were like, remember when you got so pissed that you just picked up that plastic lemon and threw it at the wall? And I was like, oh my God, just shame, right?

I was like, I did do that. What over like, just, I mean, I'm sure it was a stupid argument at the time and frustrating, whatever, but like, I'm not that person. Like, I'm just like, whatever. I find myself reacting to things. I was crying over squirrels the other day. What do you mean?

What do you mean? Okay. That's why you're like watching them frolic around. No, no, no, no. Well, I was, okay, so they are, see, this is not gonna cry that you're laughing at me. No, I'm just kidding. But like, I'm not an overly emotional person.

My mother will tell you this because she is one, and it was a point of contention in our relationship for years. I called her the other day and I was like I'm just so sad. They're cutting down trees in our neighborhood and like a nice green space golf course and building a sports thing or whatever and so squirrels are all like disrupted in their homes and And so in our backyard, there were a lot of squirrels and they were fighting and it really upset me that these squirrels were like fighting for space

and like, this is the world and we just, and it was like this whole thing. And I had to call my mom. You're becoming your mom. Exactly, and I was like, no. And it was horrifying on so many levels. I called my friend and left a voice note because I was so upset about it.

Horrifying on so many levels. So, meanwhile, the hilarious part is I was attacked by a squirrel when I was a kid, so I had no love for squirrels for a very long time, and now here I am. Look at you now. Crying over them and their habitat loss. And they're out in your backyard fighting with each other. Now they're in their backyard fighting.

Right, meanwhile my dog's like thrilled because it's just raining squirrels, and I'm like, oh god, they're all dying. It's just, ugh. Oh my God. So what I'm saying is things have changed. I am no longer the person I thought I was. Oh God. But,

like my depression got really bad at the same time. Like it got to the point where there were days I just couldn't get out of bed. And I hadn't felt like that since I was like, probably early recovery or even active addiction. So can I ask you like you're just, you just wake up and you don't, you find yourself not, you don't feel it come in or anything, you just wake up and you're like, I don't want to get out of bed today.

No, I would wake up and just be like, oh my God, everything's wrong. My anxiety. Mentally as well to all of it. Oh, mentally, physically, I get so much more tired. Like waves of exhaustion and like any woman that has been pregnant or any person that's been pregnant will tell you that first trimester, that kind of exhaustion, that's what starts happening again,

where you're like, I just, I need a nap. And again, nobody warns you of these things, so you just put all of this stuff on yourself that, oh, I'm just failing. Oh, I just suck now, like what I could do five years ago and keep going. And also brain fog. You suddenly are like, I think I have dementia.

It's you're putting your keys in the freezer. You can't find your phone. I have dementia. It's you're putting your keys in the freezer. You can't find your phone. I have ADHD. It's gotten, and I got late diagnosed, but it's gotten so much worse. The reason that a lot of women in their 40s are starting to get diagnosed is because it exacerbates all of those symptoms.

So like the forgetfulness, all of these things start happening to you that make you think, I'm just, I must have dementia, I must be just an angry old lady, I must like, you know, all of this stuff, I just have depression, I have, oh my God, my anxiety, I just can't cope anymore. Once you start reading a little bit about it,

you realize all of these things are directly connected and related, and suddenly you're like, I'm not losing my mind. And it really has been like a huge shift. Well, how many years before you realized this? Oh, it's been the past like five or six years that I just thought all of these things were like separate fires that I was putting. So this actually went to your late 30s, started in your late 30s. My late 30s, yeah, absolutely. Like during the pandemic 2020, so it's 24 now, like four or five years it's been. And you said you're 42?

42, yeah. So like late 30s, it definitely started then where I was like, oh, I just react differently or like I just, I'm sort of not that person. And of course the pandemic changed a lot of things for us too, and all of that, but I've really started putting the puzzle pieces together, and so many women out there are at this same point in their life and doing the same thing. And how many women I talk to, they're like,

oh my God, I just, I just don't have energy anymore or this is happening to me or that and I'm like oh yeah have you read about like peri-metapods or this and it's wild and it affects so many women and my husband he's like oh I get it now like he's much more gentle with me he doesn't take me personally. We got in an argument, not even an argument, but we don't really bicker anything over Naked and Afraid, the show. Yeah. What was the argument?

Neither one of us have ever watched the show, but I was just in a mood to like, just be like, that's, no, you're wrong. I don't, I'm, I don't know why, but I will pick fights and just things that did not used to be who I was. Things where I'm like, oh my God, I'm acting like a 14 year old girl. Okay, so real quick, you said a lot of ladies, moms,

are going through perimenopause and their teens are going through puberty, male or female. Looking back on knowing that now, do you think your mom was going through perimenopause while you were a teen? My mom was not for various reasons that I know of. But no, she was not, but I know that she still was probably not getting the kind of help or hormone therapy

or support that she needed for women's health because it just doesn't, we just think like no one cares. No one cares. No one cares. I mean, I don't, not laughing, but yes. No, but I mean, I laugh at it because it's true. No one cared. No one cared. I mean, I'm not laughing, but yes. No, but I mean, I laugh at it, because it's true. No one cared.

No one cared, and there's just been no research. It was like, I don't know, they just, they bleed and then they don't, right? You know, this basically how we look at this. Yes, they bleed for a while, they get old and they don't. And that shit's weird, you know what I mean? It's basically how we have handled women's health.

It dries up, they get cranky, and it stops. And we're laughing at it, but it's because it's been male It dries up, they get cranky, and it stops. And we're laughing at it, but it's because it's been male dominated and they don't have to deal with it. So your generation of women are really the first ladies learning about this. Well, the first ladies learning about it, starting to do research,

and the generation slightly before us of female physicians and researchers are like, hey, guys, there's like half the population that we haven't really checked on. I mean, we haven't even done like medical, a lot of pharmaceutical research doesn't include women specifically. So, you know, that's a whole other thing, but I talk about it because all of a sudden I'm a 42 year old woman and I didn't give a shit until I started realizing that like, yeah, nobody tells you this is coming

and it hits you like a fucking train and it spills out all over your life. Suddenly you're like, I can't do my job. I can't, this is so much. Like I used to be able to handle 9,000 things at once. And now I just can't. And I'm like, now that I know what's happening, I try to be a little more patient with myself.

But at first I just thought I sucked. I just was like, well, looks like I'm getting good at the pastor. I'm getting old and it's slowing down. Just slowing down and everything sucks. And I am a crazy person. It's also good to know that's not true. Yeah. Because now I'm like, oh, there's things I can do about it.

Like, there's a lot of stuff out there, starting to be out there that I can read about and read into. And I'm like, oh my God, okay. And talk to my friends about, and it turns out we're all going through these same symptoms, but we think we're just doing it alone. So like, you don't talk about it. And you're like, oh wait, this happening to you too?

Oh, well shit. Like, you know, and again, if you have to live around women this age, I highly suggest you also talk to them about what's going on and listen to this stuff because we feel like we're crazy. And it's just, we're not, it's just a huge shift that we're going through that no one's really prepared us for.

And also we're dealing most likely with teenagers who are assholes. It's a really terrible combination. And I wonder that anyone makes it out alive. So what are some of the things you can do to help? I mean, I heard you mention hormone therapy, just talking, is that something that's? Just, I mean, I have gone back into therapy

and I've found that I'm in a place now where I am much more like I have, I'm more emotional, but I have some perspective on it. Like I'm willing to kind of look at and dig into things that maybe I wasn't 10 years ago. I think you start kind of hitting that point. It's, you know, your quote unquote midlife crisis, but it's your midlife reflection where you start going like, oh shit. I was like about halfway through. Well, if you're the same person that you were at 20

or you're just, you're a piece of shit. You're not growing. Right, then I feel really sorry for you. Cause you're not gonna have any friends. Cause like we said, it's great to hang out with 25 year olds when you're 25. And you think you're 20 when you're like, I'm young, I'm cool. And you go around and you're like, I'm old and I'm so not cool. And I'm really happy about that.

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Turn your ordinary water into extraordinary hydration with liquid IV. Get 20% off your first order of liquid IV when you go to liquidiv.com and use code honey do a checkout. That's 20% off your first order when you shop better hydration today using promo code honeydew at liquidiv.com. Now let's get back to the deal. Um, but yeah, you know, one of the things that I've also found is meditation and learning to say no, like boundaries, boundaries. That's a big deal.

It's a really big deal. It's a huge deal for women and females in particular. We overextend ourselves a lot in the emotional welfare of everyone around us. And you're like going through all of this stuff and you feel like your usual habit of putting yourself behind everyone else just isn't working anymore. Like all of a sudden you're like,

I need to take care of me or I'm gonna burn this whole fucking house down. Isn't it interesting that we're, cause I'm the same way, I'll care take everybody. Right. And then you're like, oh man, I'm forgetting about me. Forgetting about me. And it's even just sitting for like... There's none of that without a healthy you.

None of it. And kids are demanding and teenagers especially, they are... At least my kids, I know they win sometimes just by purely wearing me down because now I am tired at 7 p.m. And so they're like, hey, mom, mom, I want to go do, mom, come on, mom, mom, please, mom, but someone's gonna pick me up, mom, come on. And you're like, you know what, I just, I just want to go to bed. Okay, fine, great. You know, and I've learned that like, stopping and being like,

you know what, give me a minute. And it also, then I don't come into conflict because then I'm not getting frustrated at them. I'm like, I've taken a little space for myself. Like little things like that where I just had to kind of redo how quickly I respond to things and how quickly I demand that response of myself, that's been key because I demand things of myself that I wouldn't of other people and it's not helpful. I think it's great to self check like that. Yeah. It's also self awareness too.

Like I say, a lot of people just would succumb to like, as I'm just getting older and it's like, well, hold on a second here. I like that there's a mindset that's like, well, let's check this shit out here. Cause next is menopause. Right. And then what the hell happens then? Then everything gets better. Does it really?

Yeah. That's so, I mean, I don't know yet, but that's what I keep reading. Is that basically what's, so, cause menopause just means menopause, once you've hit menopause, it means you haven't had a period for a year. And then, and basically you're done with that part of your life.

That, then you've entered menopause. But how does that change your body? Well, then your hormone levels kind of regulate again. They balance again. They kind of, I mean, you have like less estrogen and that, you know, whatever. There's some stuff, there's definitely things that happen there, but it's not the like, from what I hear, the crazy time of that lead up to it, where everything's changing. Sort of like the lead up to like hitting puberty in the first place and everyone's, you know, crazy. I have a middle schooler right now. Middle schoolers are insane. They're not right up here. And we hit a second one of those and you feel it.

I can tell you, it's funny you say middle school, because seventh grade, I felt it all, that's when my whole world shifted. Mine, my kids, seventh grade is. Everything, I felt like I became aware, so much more aware. Seventh grade is, it's such a hard, like I look at seventh graders and I'm just like, bless your little heart.

You're just fucking crazy and you don't even know it. You know, like they're just, and like, God, and then you're the worst and you don't even know it. And it's, I have such great empathy for seventh graders now, watching my kids having gone through it and remembering what it was like for me at that age, like, oh, it is, it's rough, it's rough. But timing-wise, I'm looking back on myself now, like, oh yeah, seventh grade was sort of that

prepubescent for sure period where you're just, you're a mess. You're either fucking or fighting. You know what I mean? Literally, that's what you're doing. That's it. And sometimes both. Like, you can't, you don't know what's wrong

and you're crying probably during all of it. No, yeah. During all of it. Right, it's just like. I mean, that is an apt description of what puberty is. It's just fucking fighting and grinding and all of it. And grinding and all of it. Like, that's just, because you don't know which way is up.

Like you really don't and it like, it kinda makes me a little bit teary when I think, cause I've just watched my kids go through it and the hardest thing is like no matter how much you watch them go through it and how much you go, oh my god, that's right. Like you can't save them from it or fix it. You know, my older daughter just had her first heartbreak

and like called me from school and was like, you have to pick me up. And I was like, maybe I can't. I can't because tomorrow you're gonna have to go to school and you're gonna like, this is, and she was like, you hate me, you don't love me. And just so you know, you fucking don't care about my meds. I was like, no, but I love you so much

that I have to sit here and watch you go through some pain that I know is just normal life stuff and like, ugh. But I try and give myself that same empathy to be like, oh, you're a little touchy right now too. Like, be gentle with yourself. And I think that's kind of where I'm at in life right now is this idea of like being gentle with myself. And it started as like this journey of,

oh, I'm just really dealing with pandemic and kids and anxiety and depression. But really I'm like, oh no, it's kind of all of it. And so like, just be gentle with yourself. I mean, normal life is wild enough. You throw a two-year pandemic in the mix and or a year and a half, whatever. And then you really don't, you can't judge anything because now you're looking at through that filter, like, well, I started doing more of this or less of that, my house, the pandemic, right? Everything shifted and, and, you know, and then like, you know, going through crazy health stuff, like all the, like life happens.

And I just am at this point where I'm like, you know, maybe, maybe I can't do 10,000 things like I could before, and that's okay. So like trying to not force myself and shoehorn myself into being that person that I was before, but like how do I adapt to this new way of being and treat myself a little more gently at the same time, you know? And so what are you doing that's different now that you say, you know, we grow older,

you change that hopefully for the better, right? What do you do these days that you wouldn't do before? Oh gosh, stay in on a Friday or Saturday night. I am so happy at home. And again, I remember during the pandemic, we all just were like, please get me out of this house. But really over a period of time, I've learned just to be a little more content

with my own company. And I've really settled into that in the last few years where I'm like, oh, no, like it's okay to just slow down and read a book or like not go engage with all of the craziness out in the world. But I did, I, when I was young, I did not plan on becoming that person. I would have rather been dead. If you would have asked me at 25,

like, hey, do you think you'll like, you know, hit a restaurant at 6 p.m. and be in bed by 9, reading a book or doing a crossword? I'll be like, uh, yeah, if I come back, if I've died and come back as an old, like 95 year old lady, sure. But never in my wildest dreams did I plan on on being a person that was content with like

a little quiet in my life. And now I find that like I need both, you know. I like to go out and do stuff, but I definitely need that recharge. I mean, I'm fortunate that I get to go do stand up, come see me on tour, tickets are available on my website at Ryansechler.com. But like I'm fortunate that I get to go do stand-up come see me on tour tickets are available on my website at Ryan sickle.com but um Like I'm not I've never been I had friends that would go to clubs Non-stop I have friends like that in my 20s and once in a blue moon I'd go and we would they would stand at a tape. I'm like, this is what you do all night We got here at nine o'clock. Yeah, you're gonna stand for five hours here

and kind of try to pick up a girl or two here and there. Like, and if not, just point out the ones that you think are like, this is what you guys do. Right. Like, yeah. I'm like, you could just drink this beer at home and do this, you know what I mean? Like for real. And I've never felt like, I've never been a club guy.

Like I've never had a club shirt. I've never been that guy. Not a dancer dude. You never been that guy? No, never been that guy. The rocker. See I was, I was definitely. I was never that.

I inflicted myself upon the world when I was young. But the job that I have, we have, allows me to be among the people on the weekend who are drinking, having a good time. So I feel like that quota gets met. Yeah. And then during the week, I just wanna go home and get the fuck away from everything.

But I was never like that before. Anything past midnight these days, oh. Tomorrow? Oh God. You mean tomorrow? I'm like, wait, well, AM? Like the middle, like the dark one? In the middle of the night?

Yo. The dark 12. Yeah, it is, like the dark one in the middle of the night. Yo. The dark 12. It is, it is, and I, I will, I laugh cause I'm like, I never used to see this side of the sunrise, you know what I mean? It was like the sun coming up with like, like the end of the day for me.

Going out at 11, starting my night at 11. And now I'm like, ooh, it's like a nice, bright, crisp morning. I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with me? But it is, I've shifted this whole perspective of life. And I don't, I don't care what people think of me anymore. I know I'm wearing rainbow Lego earrings. I don't care. I love them, they look great.

You know, I love who I am. Didn't have that for my first puberty. Didn't love who I am. Me either. Second one, kind of a psychotic bitch sometimes, but I really am liking who I'm becoming. I am. You were talking about seventh graders and I was thinking that like everything was such a big deal to you.

That my pants, they're gonna make fun of my shoes or my top or my, and that was your whole fucking work. Because they would. Because they would. Because they're evil. They are so mean. They are so fucking mean. My kids, I'm like, oh, you guys,

they will read the filth better than a drag queen on any day. They will zero in on your soul and be like, and that. And you're like, oh my God. You just, that's awful, but very clever. But oh my God. I do have to like, you guys say that? Yeah, yeah. That's good, but don't say that shit.

As long as it's funny, I'll let it slide. But it just, they're mean, and it's because they're all so afraid, and you're so wrapped up in self, and like, oh, exhausting. How freeing now, though. Oh, it's so great. To not give a rat's ass.

I don't give a shit. Nope. I don't, I will dance in the middle of a grocery store. If we're running late, I'm going to school, dropping her off with my hood up, because my hair is all over the place, I got my, I don't give a rat's ass. You of a grocery store. If we're running late, I'm going to school, dropping her off with my hood up because my hair is all over the place. I'm like, I don't give a right. You on time?

She's on time. Yeah, I will roll in my PJs. Yeah. It like, I was running the other day because my kid left her backpack in the car, right? Mom, I need it. So I pulled over down the street, running in my slippers and no bra, just, in the morning, right?

I got your backpack. It was just like a fucking crazy person. I fling a slipper off. As I'm running down the sidewalk, one goes this way. I almost fall down. Meanwhile, my kid's just like, Oh my fucking God. Oh my God. What are you doing? And I'm like, I have your backpack!

You know, it's like, I don't care. I'm like, fuck you little seventh graders. I lived through you people, you know? That's right, that's right. It's like, it's, you'll sometime, you know what? You'll get to be this lady someday too, and you won't care. You just like, can't. to be this lady someday too, and you won't care. You just wait.

Right, and it's just, it is a relief, but it's also so painful to watch your kids go through it, because you don't get to be on the other side of it till you go through it. Yeah, you really don't. And look how long it takes us to even appreciate it. They're just in, they're in it. They're in it.

And everything is a big deal, because you've never done any of it before. Like heartbreak is awful. You've never felt this. This might be the thing that kills you. It feels like it might. Man, you couldn't tell me anything when I was heartbroken. And like, it'll be, there's plenty of fish and all that. It doesn't mean, no, there's not.

No, there's, I'm going to die alone now. It's over now. Forever. We had our kids named. We knew where we were going. We knew everything. You don't even understand. Right.

All right, well get some sleep. We got science in the morning. Right, yeah, you're like, great, just study for your test. Right, because we're just like, dude, you have no idea how the world is going to just like stomp on your soul. This is nothing. But I try and remember that like, they don't know what's in store for them yet.

So like, don't blow it. You know what I mean? Just be like, yeah, this is the worst it's ever gonna be. You know, in the middle of the ball. I like telling my daughter like, hey, you know what? You know how all those kids make fun of you and you guys make fun of them? We had that too.

And then all of a sudden the internet came out. That's the thing is it's- They just started raining shit on top of me. That's the thing is like it does break my heart because these kids are dealing with these feelings that feel so permanent and now they're dealing with them all the time. Like there's no off switch, there's no walking away from it

and it sucks, it fucking sucks. I would not want to be a young person. And it like, it fucking sucks. I would not wanna be a young person. And now you can Photoshop stuff, you can do anything you want. There's just, everything's fake. And like, how awful, I feel awful for these kids growing up like that. But I also, I try and remember that so much

of the heartbreak and the pain and that awful shit that you want to save your kids from is exactly what, like, you have to experience. And so watching them, like, from afar and being like, oh no, okay, you're gonna be fine. You know, it's like when they first start walking or they're at the playground, you're like, no, that's great, run, no, no. Your head's way too far in front of your body. You know, it's just scarier

because now they're doing it while driving a car. My daughter drove to school today. Today? Yeah. I mean, not by herself. I was in the car, but still we're in that phase. So it's a lot. She's 15 then learned from it. 16. She's 16.

And getting her hours in right now? Getting her hours in, doing her behind the wheel training, through like AAA. How's she do? She's doing great. She's actually a really good driver. I'm shocked. Yeah? I mean, at least when I'm in the car,

God only knows what will happen once she has her actual license. But no, she's responsible and seems to be paying attention and she really watches everything going on. And I'm also not the parent that's gripping the oh shit handle in the car as they're driving. I'm like, no, you're doing great. Because I know that makes her more calm. She doesn't need me stressing out in the passenger seat.

So now with perimenopause, next is menopause. And then I'll be done. Then I can just throw my uterus up against the wall. But. Oh! You're all for that. Just fucking take it. Yeah, yeah.

How long, so perimenopause, you said before, is. It can be like two to 10 years. This is what I think you said out there before we record. It can really be that long. It can be, it can be like 10 years. So you can be lucky and get in and out quick. You can get in and out, some women are like- Community colleges, you can community college it.

Some women are like, I didn't even notice anything. Oh shit, it's gone. And some women are like, I've been through hell for 10 years. You know? 10 years. It could, like, like anything, you know, your body doesn't just flip a switch,

it's sort of recalibrating itself over a period of time. So like, I'm kind of like, okay, now I have to learn how to work with this. And luckily I have amazing, I have so many incredible, like my OBGYN, like I said, she many incredible, like my OBGYN, like I said, she's incredible, like holistic. She does aggravating medicine too. So she's not, she does Western regular old medicine,

but then she also has like incorporates all different kinds of herbal practices and things like that, that have really been shown to be helpful during this stuff. And like, she's like, why can't we use both? Why don't we use, throw everything we've got at it. Acupuncture is something I started doing that really helped. I love acupuncture. Oh my God. That does help.

It helped so much. Just like meditation, again, the little lifestyle changes, adding in a couple supplements, iron, all of a sudden I'm like, oh, I don't look like someone's just kicking me randomly in my sleep when I wake up in the morning. I'm like, bruise, are you just hitting me with a stick

while I sleep, babe, what are you doing? That's also common. You just start, your body just doesn't, your iron levels drop. Oh, nobody told me that. So just little things that I've learned from so many of my great like doctors and women who have been going through this and it's like, why aren't we talking about this more? Literally everyone is affected by women in their life going through

this and also it's when breast cancer rates go up and when you know all of this stuff. Oh is that right? Yeah like cervical cancer all of this stuff. Oh, is that right? Yeah, like cervical cancer, all of this stuff, as your hormones start shifting, like those things all start going up too. So it's, you gotta start just paying more attention to yourself than you did in your 20s and 30s when you were like, that's fine,

and that leg will reattach itself, you know? Yeah, yeah. All of a sudden you're like, oh, I am actually a delicate little flower and I need, God, we are fragile. Yeah, we're just complicated houseplants. So let me ask you this, and maybe you don't have an answer, I am actually a delicate little flower and I need, you know. God, we are fragile. Yeah, we're just complicated houseplants. So let me ask you this, and maybe you don't have an answer, I don't know,

but how do you educate the men in your life or your children in your life about this? And how do you deal with moms so they don't just say, mom, you're being a bitch. Right, I mean, they do still say that. And then I punch them right in their face. No, I don't do. No, I, you know, I,

one thing I've always been very open and like honest about is like bodies, physicality, like what you're experiencing in your life are how, like there's nothing that's off limits to talk about. So I'll be like, oh my God, I'm having a hot flat, you know, like just call it out, say it. Like it's, I think also as women were taught, you know, this is that point in our life when it's like,

oh, and now nobody wants you. Now you become invisible. Out to the pasture with you. Right, and my friend Paulina Portskova, who was the model and she and I did a show together. We were bunk mates out in the jungles of Canada, of Panama together. And I love her. And she has written, she wrote a whole book about it. And she is really a huge advocate about talking about what happens as women get older and all of a sudden, like nobody really counts.

They're like, oh, they're invisible now. And like- She was a model. And she was a model. Right. Made a living at this. But she is- Was she married to Rick O'Casey?

Yes, she was married to Rick. From the cars, right? Yeah, yeah, there was, and that was the whole thing. But she is brilliant. She is an incredible writer and author, and she's so smart. She has, she's She's incredibly well-educated on politics and feminist issues, all kinds of stuff. And she was talking about that all her life though.

She was pretty, so nobody, you know. And now she's like, now I get to be me. Because now all of a sudden people, that's not the focus. And it's this real sense of like, kind of reclaiming yourself. I think that women, it's our version of like, you know, going and buying a Corvette, all of a sudden we're like, wait a minute, I've done all this shit for everybody else.

Like, and you'll see women in their 40s start kind of going, I'm going on a girls weekend, bye. Yeah. Bye, I gotta go, because all of a sudden we start realizing our place in the world is shifting. And like, I gotta do some stuff for me so that I can continue to like, take care of people around me.

But it takes older women and people that have been through it and talking about it with our partners, with men in our lives, with our, you know, like our brothers, our friends being like, this shit is going on. And my husband is so understanding and like, I'll send him stupid reels from Instagram or different books or whatever. And he pays attention. They're listening. This shit's going to be popping up in all of my feed. But he pays attention and he reads and he's like,

oh, he listens and you know, he'll know when I'm like just being, and he's like, it's okay. Like he doesn't try and be like, this is stupid or not happening because that's what happens to so many women is they're like, oh, this is just in your head. Like you're just overreacting,

which don't ever say that. Don't ever overreacting, which don't ever say that. Don't ever, don't ever say that. Listen, don't ever say that. Particularly to a woman in their 40s. Just don't ever say it in general, but we will say it. Keep it in your thoughts. Don't try it. And we are not here to play.

Yeah, we don't care. Send us to jail. What do we got? Doesn't matter. No one will ask us for shit. Great. You're right. Yeah, no, I'm not saying that. It was not great, obviously,

but yeah, you know, that's like, it really just, we need to start talking about like how people change as you get older. And like, there's nothing wrong with it. And that you, it's not about like, oh, I'm not who I used to be. It's like, okay, like now I'm a different version of that person. And so maybe I'm a little crankier,

or whatever, so fucking what? I like me more now. That's the important part right there. That's the thing, it's really, this is also a period in my life when I'm like, oh, I'm learning to like, like Paulina talked about, really like me, this version of me, the me that wears rainbow Lego earrings and builds a Lego plant on a Friday night

and listens to a science podcast and is so fucking happy because that was what seventh grade me wanted to do and was so terrified of not being cool or okay that like, I missed out on a lot of like moments that would have just been peaceful for me because I was chasing. Especially you too. Yeah. I mean, God, your life growing up too is so wild and different than most people. Yeah. So I, you know, I, I, and also going back to some of the things that I did enjoy as a kid,

as a young person, like going back to some of those things and being like, oh yeah, it's nice to find that person again. You know? Yeah, Legos are timeless too. I'm a Lego nerd. I'm a huge Lego nerd. My husband actually- Like that's one place you could go into a store

as an adult by yourself and nobody would question why this adult's in a Lego store. I will go to the Lego store for hours. I'm a Lego rewards member. I- What do you mean? You go sit and play in the store? You put stuff together. No, I mean, I buy so many that I get points because...

No, but I mean, you say you'll go for hours. You're just shopping. I will go and shop. I will go, I look online. I don't know where I'm putting all these fucking Legos. I actually wanna figure out a way to like donate them or do something and like, cause I'm like, I know you can do, but I'm like, I'm leaving, but I'm like,

but I don't want to take them apart. Yeah. It's a whole thing. All I'm saying is if you find Legos in your forties, be warned, it's an expensive habit. But yeah, I just, I'm trying to like enjoy this new part of my life and also create in it. And like, I have a new voice and a different voice.

So I'm writing and directing and doing comedy and you know. Yeah, you're doing so much. It's just, it's a really fun time of life, weirdly. Like there's a lot of shifting and changing, but I'm also like, huh, I think whatever is on the other side of this is another level of freedom and enjoyment of who I am. Good for you, Jodie Sweeten.

Thank you for doing this. Thank you for coming on and talking about all this. I was so excited to come and see you and talk to you. It had been a while and I just, I love talking to you. We have fun. Please promote whatever you'd like again one more time. Absolutely, you can follow me on Instagram at Jodie Sweeten. You can also check out my podcast, How Rude Podcast. It's how, at How Rude Podcast on Instagram at Jodie Sweeten. You can also check out my podcast, How Rude Podcast.

It's at How Rude Podcast on Instagram. It's How Rude Teneritos, Andrew, Barbara and I doing a full house rewatch podcast, watching the original episodes because we've never watched the show. Is that right? Yeah. So I've been-

I'm gonna tell my daughter that tonight. She's gonna be like, what? We keep it pretty PG-13 on that one. So you can watch on, or you can have- What's it called again? How Rude Tanneritos. We combined our catchphrases. But I've been doing that.

And then I have family dinner at the Bourbon Room on June 19th. And you can buy tickets at bourbonroomhollywood.com or you can check out my link tree and I have them on there too. Awesome. Thank you for real. Absolutely. Always. As always, Ryan Sickler on all your social media.

Come see me on tour. Tickets are on my website at RyanSickler.com. We'll talk to you all next week. You