The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Joel McHale - Dewlexia

Episode Date: September 20, 2021

My HoneyDew this week is Joel McHale! Joel Highlights the Lowlights of growing up with dyslexia and how he beat the system! Joel also shares a story about his son's open heart surgery when he was only two months old! SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://www.youtube.com/rsickler  SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! You now get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! Sign up for a year and get a month free! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew  SPONSORS: - Find out how Upstart can lower your monthly payments today when you go to https://UPSTART.com/HONEYDEW. - Secure your online data TODAY by visiting https://ExpressVPN.com/honeydew and you can get an extra three months FREE. - Go to https://Purple.com/honeydew and use promo code honeydew for 10% off any order of $200or more. - Get 25% off your membership at https://Fitbod.me/honeydew 

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the Night Pants Nation tour is underway. Indianapolis, you are up next September 30th through October 2nd. Baltimore, one night only October 23rd. Brea, California October 28th. All tickets are available at ryans sickler.com go get yours today the honeydew with ryan sickler welcome you're on Welcome back to the Honeydew, y'all. We're over here doing it in the Night Pants studios. I'm Ryan Sickler, ryansickler.com. Ryan Sickler on all social media.

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Listen, it's five bucks a month. And so far, the last like three episodes, four episodes, we've had a man who fell off, listen to this, a 60-foot cliff in the wilderness, real wilderness. Okay. This is Bobcat Goldthwait. a 60-foot cliff in the wilderness, real wilderness, and then survived paralyzed, quadriplegic for 30 hours in the wilderness by himself. Had to learn how to walk again and everything, and he made it. We had another guy who was a land surveyor, stepped on a stick, a rock popped up, spins around. Turns out that rock's got two eyes, and it's staring at him.

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that's it there it is all right now you know what we do here we highlight the low lights these are the stories behind the storytellers ladies and gentlemen the storyteller here today first time on the honeydew please welcome joe mckay everybody welcome to the honeydew joe thank you thank you for being here thank you thank you joe this is a nice setup and the office outside doesn't look at all like you're the first to stand up oh well you know i wanted to be it doesn't look at all like uh that um terrorists are planning something it uh yeah it is very uh like true detective out there all right we're trying to be welcoming a little bit. You did break our fucking coffee machine, but what else?

Well, I don't think. I feel like that's an error in design. And the Keurig, which is not problematic for landfills. Wow. This is the soapbox I'm going to stand on. If you put the water in and then you push it, there's a long pause for the water to heat the water to get it through. Long enough to make you think you did something wrong. I thought it was instantaneous.

I feel like the hotel ones are instantaneous. I'm not a coffee guy. I'm just drinking water. You don't drink coffee? No. Why not? I don't drink it because I always thought as I was younger, I thought everyone drank coffee black. And then I started seeing my grandmother put all this shit in it,

and then I would sip it, and I was like, oh, well, that's exactly how I would drink coffee too. You have a liquid candy bar. I'm glad I don't fucking do that. So I just stayed away from it. Do you drink any caffeine at all? Yes. I have Diet Coke as my – and tea. Coke Zero?

Unsweetened tea. No, just Diet Coke. But I can't taste any of it now. It tastes like – all of it tastes like shit. So water. What does water taste like to you? It doesn't have a taste. It has to have something on it for me to – a sweetness or – my mouth can feel things, if that makes sense.

I can feel heat. Salt? So I like – salt is a little bit. All sweets are the same sweet taste. If I was an alien that was not familiar with texture of food, ice cream being cold, cake, cupcakes, it all tastes the same to me. All of it. All sweet tastes the same. Sweet, all smells.

Like when your coffee was brewing over here, I can't smell your coffee, but I do smell this poisonous smell in the air. And that's the same smell I smell, whether it's gasoline or someone, a barbecue. I walked by the other day. It all smells the fucking same. So something's happening because before I didn't even have that. Did your diet change? No. You still like the foods that you like? By memory, I will still eat the foods that i know i like do you drink no i'm not a drinker i'm a smoker i smoke weed i don't i drink i don't not have any drinks right but i'm not a drink what does wine taste like i shit beer tastes like all of it tastes the same you could give me an ipa or a light beer and it's all the same garbage wow Wow. Yeah. So, can we please, enough about my BS, will you please plug

and promote anything you like? Boy, I don't. Watch Stargirl. That's on the DC app and CW and I don't know. I should have looked up

my stand-up shows, but I got it. Is there a website? Yeah, go to JoelMcHale.com. You'll see it. And then, I don't know, watch Crime Scene Kitchen on Hulu. It's still there. You look good, dude.

49. You fucking look amazing. Thank you, Ryan. Amazing. That was my pandemic way to deal with anxiety. Went into it? Just kind of like, if I don't exercise, I'm going to drink all the wine and eat all the steak, and then I will have a problem. Right.

A bigger problem than I already do. Well, I'm glad you're healthy. I do want to say this. Today, we were talking before the show, Norm MacDonald passed. I don't normally get to record episodes and flip them within the week, and I'm glad we are with this one. And I just wanted to say it's such a sad day. He's a legend. Everyone loves – there's no one – I have never heard a bad story about Norm MacDonald. They're all outrageously hilarious and kind and funny. I was glad to be able to meet him. Where did you meet him?

At the Irvine Improv. I met him. And I'll tell a story here. So Tom Segura and I were down there and we had done a show together. And then Norm came in to do one behind us. And his opener was going to be up for like 30 minutes. And it was Frank back in the day at Irvine, the old Irvine. And he's like, hey, Norm is a big weed smoker. Do you have some weed? I go, yeah, I have some weed. And he's like, will you take him outside and get him high? I go, sure. If he's comfortable doing that right before he goes up, okay?

I don't like to do that. And I smoke weed. I don't mind doing it before a podcast because I'm listening to you. But if I've got a structure in my head, I feel like it throws it off. Even if it's that much, it's my timing. I can't drink before a show because I feel like it's playing basketball or something. I know some guys it activates and works well, but so you went outside. So Tom, Norm, and I go outside and I'm a bit OCD. I like things clean. I like things neat. And I had just cleaned this bowl that I had, this glass, but I had just cleaned it. And most people, when you, back in the day before a pandemic, if you borrowed a bowl from somebody, it was, you were sucking through that dirt and your lungs, you're going to pass out before you get high

because your oxygen's running low. But this thing is hitting like it's brand new. Okay. And how do you clean it, by the way? I take rubbing alcohol, salt, and water, and I heat it on increments in the microwave in a little microwave-safe dish, about seven to eight seconds. And then I boil it, and then it'll get real loose in there, and I take pipe cleaners and just poke it through. Wow. That's it. Not joking around. No.

Okay. So this pipe is – but I have just done this. It is brand new, basically. You can eat off of it. And I tell Norm, you know, this is some really good fucking weed. And don't rip that pipe. I just cleaned it. And he's like, whatever.

You know, he's a big weed turner. So he packs the fucking thing. And we're out in the parking lot, right, in the middle of everything. And he takes this fucking hit. And I just look at Tom like, holy shit. A cloud comes out of him. He's coughing. He's crying.

And he's like, oh, my God. I fucking told you not to rip it that hard, dude. I'm telling you. And then he starts laughing and we start talking about the British office. And he and I connect so hard on all the little idiosyncrasies of Ricky Gervais in the British office. And we're dying and talking about all these little moments we love. And then he goes in and he's fucked up. He did one hit.

He did more than one hit. He just did that one like he was going to space and continued to smoke. And then the fucking security comes up they see it it's a cloud you know we're we're right in the middle right out front you know what i'm talking about so the guy comes up and we're like oh fuck oh fuck you know we're not supposed to be doing this out here like this it's a it's like a saturday night there's families out there and the guy comes up and thank god he recognized but he didn't at first he recognizes norm he goes hey man you can't be doing that oh oh hey hey hey you can't be doing that like it went turned real quick he goes well this guy gave me the weed i'm like this motherfucker he's like all right we're going inside

so he goes inside and frank's like did you get him high i go yeah but he got like really fucking high and then norm just to be a dicks like i don't know what he gave me frank but i'm pretty sure sickler gave me some lace shit he's like you came laced weed i'm like i would never smoke laced weed i did not do that and then he went up there and i'm telling you joel this motherfucker improv'd a good five minutes on the drink slice because the improv had pepsi at the time and it wasn't sprite it was slice remember Slice. Remember that drink, Slice? And he shit on Slice for like five fucking minutes. It was the funniest shit

I've ever heard and I think that was enough to sort of get him back, reset, and then he just ran and crushed. Yeah, it was great.

It was great. How long was his show? God, he probably did an hour and a half. Wow. Yeah, he would go for a while.

Yeah, there's only, I feel like – I only met him a couple times. It's one of those things that everyone's just like, he was the nicest guy. The nicest. And he was such a powerful influence. When he got on Weekend Update, it was like the lights turned on. Yeah, the whole OJ thing of kicking him off or shitting on OJ too much. And his horrible Burt Reynolds that was the best Burt Reynolds ever, Turd Ferguson. Yeah.

So good. That whole shit on Jeopardy, just the best. His Larry King. Yeah. And then his appearances on talk shows, they reminded me of like a Jeff Goldblum-like. Like you're like, nobody is made like that. It's just, it was like that part,

like when you talk about, do you think I can make it? Then you see a person like that. I was like, that person's going to be famous because they are so unique and so talented. And it just reminds me of this time. He, uh,

Conan was interviewing Courtney Thorne Smith from a zillion different things. And he was the, he had been the lead guest and was still on the couch. And she was promoting a movie with Carrot Top in it that she had done. And Conan goes, what's the name of the movie? And then Norm's like, I know the name of that movie. And he goes, it was with Carrot Top, right? And she's like, yeah. And he's like, Box Office Poison. And he goes, it was with Carrot Top, right? And she's like, yeah. And he's like, box office poison.

And then, and then, She's in that fucking thing. And then she's, you can clear, and then yeah, she's, Conan's like,

she's in the movie, you know that? Uh-huh. And then, and then she goes, no, it's called Chairman of the Board. And he goes,

board is spelled B-O-R-E-D. And Conan, you guys like snot shooting out of his nose. Yeah, there's no way he's going to hold that in, right? It was like her poor, it just made me worry. He's like, you know you're walking out, there's an assassin sitting next to you because he is going, he is so clever and so quick. But 61, my lord. That's young. It and so quick. But 61, my Lord.

That's young. It was so shocking. We were talking, but I didn't know he was sick. Yeah, that's the other thing. I feel like people are doing that these days. They're keeping their sickness to themselves, and then you find out at the last minute, and then quickly they're gone. Yeah. Chadwick Boseman was the same way.

Yeah. Well, love to Norm's family and friends for sure. He is an icon. Yeah, no doubt. Boy, what a just a titan for comedy for so long. So let's talk about you here. I do want to get into some things with you because I ask everyone to send their list, and your list had a few things on it. But dyslexia –

Yeah. And we're going to get into some very scary shit later too. But dyslexia is something – Oh, yeah. Yeah. I don't know that we've had – we've had a few people come on, but I don't know that they've really – it's been this thing for them in a way. So let's go back to the beginning because this starts when yeah does this come from another a parent uh well uh it came from my dad but he doesn't really admit it and because it's passed because he's that generation of dads yeah

he was like i don't think so my mom's like, she can't spell. And yeah, my dad was very smart and married my mom, who it was a newspaper editor. What did your dad do? He did a lot of things, but eventually he had his own executive headhunting company. Okay. Which he probably should have been like an artist because he can do sculpture and drawing and stuff. But he was a businessman. But eventually he was like, I found out what I'm good at. I was like, what?

And he's like, talking to old rich men. And that's executive hand hunting is that. And so that worked. And he did well. But he needed my mom to like proofread and all that stuff. Just like I need my wife to do that on mine still you do oh well i send texts to people and they'll be like are you drunk i'm like i i didn't read it carefully and yes i'm probably drunk probably uh but i yeah it was i knew early on my older

brother also has it my younger brother definitely did not have it uh it was such a because when i finally like started like, you figured out. Is it just the three of your siblings? Yeah. Okay. But I figured out, well,

one of us, I ate my twin in utero and yeah, twins do that. You were a twin? No. I was going to say, were you about to be one

and you snuffed them out? I just took the umbilical cord and wrapped it around. I was like, I can only be the only one coming out. I was C-sectioned. And then my mom was told after she had me that there's no way that you're going to have another kid with everything that happened down there.

And then she got pregnant again. And then the doctors, she didn't believe the doctors, and she kept on drinking and smoking. And then my little brother came out, and he was the smartest one. So he went to like a good school. So anyway, that said, I clearly was not a great student and continue to not be, but I, you know, the school system as it was and continues to be is geared for a certain kind of student. And it's a very narrow slice of, speaking of slice, it's a narrow slice of students. But I got held back.

I was in a thing called transitional. If you don't mind, let me interrupt for a second. I was held back in high school. When do you first realize you, this shit's i'm having trouble with this or is it before you're held back uh i i didn't even think about being held back i i was always in like the i didn't i i just uh it was so early on that they realized i couldn't really read uh that they are were already putting me in the special kids' classes. And I remember in third grade, we would always,

like a group of us would go to this other part. And while the other students were learning cursive, they were like, what did you do? I was like, we made paper mache monkeys. And I remember, I remember just like, we were just doing art projects. And I always, so I knew I couldn't read. I never thought about what the what it was a diagnosis or

anything like that well you're a kid so you yeah so i'm just like but also you say you're not a great student was it because of this learning disability or were you also acting out in class and all that were you a bad kid or you're just not a good student not a good student. Not a good student. Okay. But obviously you can... You must love that. That's going to be great for your OCD. You're just going to let that stay there. It's on your pants. I'm good. This table is a whiskey drinking, weed smoking table.

We could scratch this all up. You just fucking spill it. This is great. Wow. I like how... You hate that coffee, dude. I'm drinking it all. It's not good coffee, but it's drinkable.

It's what we have. It's what we have. Do you have any melon? Yeah, plenty of it. Really? Yeah, no one wants honeydew. We have crates of it, bro, crates. Yeah, I can't stand it.

I feel like they take a lot of cantaloupe and honeydew and round out every fruit bowl with it. That's the whole point, yeah. And then you eat around it and leave that shit and bounce. Yeah. Imagine just the perfectly good fruit thrown away. Yeah. That's what it's all about. It should be eliminated from the planet.

Okay, what were we talking about? Oh, right. So I began, I just, so I was like, so I kind of felt like, I think I know I'm funny and people like me. I like them. I'm a terrible student. All these other kids are getting A's.

And, you know, but I, so I started just cheating. That's how I got around everything. And I cheated all the way through high school, I mean, high school and college. You did? All the way through. Yeah. I'm not, I mean, whenever I do college gigs and I get interviewed by the student paper, I'll be like, yeah, I shouldn't have gotten to college. You did? All the way through. Yeah. I'm not proud. I mean, whenever I do college gigs and I get interviewed by the student paper, I'll be like, yeah, I shouldn't have gone to college. And I was like, I definitely should have skipped it and just gone into University of Washington.

That's a big school, though. Well, yeah, it's big. How do you get in? Do you have to take SATs? Oh, yeah. I got a combined 850 on my SATs. And that was, see? Thank you, brother.

Thank you. You make me feel good. I had my firsts. And that was, thank you. You make me feel good. I had my first one. Oh, this makes me feel so good. This makes me feel so good. What'd you get? I got an 860. And I was like, Ryan Sickler, step your shit up. You're a 3.0 student.

You're better than that. I don't test well, but fuck that. We're going to do it again. And I did. And I improved. And I got an 870. Look at that that 10 points bro all right this community college for me that's well uh i my grades in high school like i started

with a one four in like the first quarter my mom was like what is happening and i was like don't worry it's gonna be great and then by senior year, I was averaging like a 3.9, 3.8. Damn, you cheated that well? Oh, I was so good at it. What were your techniques? I would sit next to the right people. I'd make deals. I had a friend that would always finish before me with alphabetical order, Matt Schilling, S-H-M-S-I.

We've been friends since kindergarten. And he went to Princeton. Like, I knew. He was the right guy. He would slide that paper like this, and then he would just sit at his desk after he was done like that. And I'd be back there like, B-C-D. And I just thought, ah, the American education system. Yeah.

But I would also, if they allowed to have scratch paper, I would just, well, when I was in college, I could get the tests in advance because I played football and they had all the tests. You played for Washington? Not well. I was a walk-on. But still, you played? Yeah, I mean, I practiced a lot. What position? Tight end.

Okay. I was really good at getting hit by the defense. I made them feel so good about themselves. Let's take a quick break and tell you about our first sponsor, Upstart. If you dread looking at your credit card statements, you are not alone. Debt can feel crippling, but Upstart can help you on your path to financial freedom. Upstart is the fast and easy way to pay off your debt with a personal loan all online. Whether it's paying off credit cards, consolidating high interest debt, or funding personal expenses,

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And you can get an extra three months for free. Expressvpn.com slash honeydew. Now, let's get back to the do. Do you, can I ask you about any times like when you were a kid when they would make you guys read aloud and things like that would you do you remember oh yeah that was a shit oh spelling bees and reading aloud spelling bees were just i mean it was not i'd be like they'd be like uh choke and i'd be like, yes. That's what I'm doing right now. This is going to happen right now. And it's funny because I was joked around in class. I was liked in class. I'm obviously very social.

I am a golden retriever in that way. But then they would hear me spell and be like, what the fuck is wrong with you? And I'm like, I don't know. And so, yeah, I was ashamed of it, no doubt. So I was'm like, I don't know. And so, yeah, I wasn't, I was, you know, I was ashamed of it, no doubt. But I, so I was just like, I'm going to get around this and I'm going to beat this system. And I did. You beat it all the way through.

Did you get a bachelor's degree? I got a master's. You got a master's? Yeah. You cheated the system all the way to the top. Well, the master's was in like acting and performing. So that was when you can't cheat in. Yeah, you can't read.

Oh, you don't have to read, I guess. Yeah, and people are like, oh, can you not memorize? And I was like, that has nothing to do with dyslexia. That's what I was going to ask you, too. Do you have trouble reading scripts and putting it into memorization? No, memorizing is easy. Okay. It's the reading of the script that just takes longer.

Got it. So when my agents will be like, they're interested in you for this movie, and I'll be like, did you read it? Because I go, unless you think it's good for me, I'm not going to read it. And then they'll go, it's a good thing. You should do it. And then I went, set the meeting,

and that will force me to read it because I'm also, my attention is all over the map. So that's how I usually do those reads or do those meetings. So I read much slower, but my comprehension is off the charts. Killer, okay. What about actually writing? When you sit down to write jokes or material, do you actually still write or do you type and what is that like?

I have notebooks. I write everything out. What's easier for you reading or writing well writing is also like a shit show because i'll leave out words i'll misspell everything if you look at my my joke book it looks like the ravings of a lunatic because it'll just say like penis uh and then it'll be like, Iowa is dumb. And if I'm in Iowa. So then the other thing, I don't write out jokes word for word. I go, like if I'm doing it also, I never write jokes because I also have terrible attention and don't concentrate. But when I get a gig, I'll be like, oh, I'm going there. Like I just did Ohio University in Athens, Ohio, and I was like, okay, so I'm going to have, I know I got to do like a half an hour new material about them.

So that I'll scramble on the plane and write out all that stuff. So it, no test have I ever prepared for in advance. Really? Ever. And so, but the true test, I was always like, if I'm in a play, like in a Shakespeare play, like you better know that shit when you walk out on stage. And so I've never, like on stage, I've never forgotten my lines. I've been in plays where people go up and they forget them.

And then it's a good time. Then it gets very funny. Do you have anxiety about any social media posts or spelling things incorrectly? Oh, I will post something and my wife will be like, here's what you screwed up. And then I have to go back and fix it. The weird part is that nobody notices hardly. I'm like, hey, they're just as dumb as me. I think most people don't care these days.

Most people don't care that, which unfortunately people don't know the difference between there, there, there, you know, these things. But they also don't seem to give a fuck. Or were and were. Right. No. Yeah. I mean, it's an interesting – It is.

It's like, you shouldn't be okay with that, but I appreciate it. Yeah. Yeah. You know? My wife is – she's so smart, and so she corrects everything. I'm – yeah. So I'm – thank God thank god so it's great so anyway dyslexic still today oh yeah you don't with a master's degree well yeah but that wasn't

whatever it's still it's still but for the soup it would take when i started the soup it would take me four hours to get through 22 minutes of jokes so uh is that from prompter or prompter which i could not read and I had tons of anxiety about that to this day. I have to know it in advance, but the anxiety thankfully has gone down for dyslexia at least. And that, and I got to a point on the soup where we were doing it live and we would promote it. Cause there was a time when I was ashamed of it and especially in school where I'd be like, I'm just going to get around this by joking and playing sports and doing acting.

But then when the soup came on and then we started doing shows live, I would promote it by saying I'm dyslexic so I don't know what I'm going, I don't know what's going to happen. And that made, you know, that was very liberating. And to have the pressure of live, the live television happening, it really is in the, you know, it took me years to kind of be really comfortable. That's why when I see like hosts starting off and they're already great, I'm like, oh, fuck, that was not me.

And thank God, like the first year of the soup, nobody watched. And then I got good and comfortable at it. And then it, you know. Well, aren't you the longest tenured host on there too? Weren't you the longest? Yeah, everyone else left. Right. But still, you stayed.

Everyone left to do other things. That's why they left? Yeah, I mean, most of them, you know, obviously. Aisha, John, they all. And Kinnear left, obviously. Kinnear originally, yeah, I do remember that. I was just like, hey, they're offering me, if I can do this once a week and still do community or a movie, then I'm taking the money. And also, I enjoyed the hell out of it.

So of all the gigs, community, the soup, those things, what was the most difficult then? Would it be the prompter reading of the soup because you could memorize your community lines? Well, I mean, there was different advantages and disadvantages to both. Obviously, community was community, and I couldn't believe I was on such a good show. Awesome. But the hours were bananas, and I didn't see my kids, you know, when they were little. I just lived at their, you know, I, oh, look, they're, it's happening again.

No. I'll say that. So, no, they, so that was rough there, but, you know, we loved each other on that, in that cast. And so that was, but the soup, yes, the prompter was rough and the, and I mean, the staff was so good that we were in a good rhythm as the years went on. And that gig, I mean, I would go to community, get my makeup on, go to E for four hours, do the soup, and then go back to community. Oh, shit.

Okay. Just split your day like that. Yeah, we were working 80-hour weeks. God. Oh, shit. Okay. Just split your day like that. Yeah, we were working 80-hour weeks.

God. We were always working overnight on Fridays where we started at 6 a.m. on Monday, and then we kept going long until we had to finish the episode or get close to it. So we would end at 8 a.m. on Saturday morning, and then I would miss flights to the East Coast to go do stand-up because I am a workaholic maniac. So these are all luxurious problems, but I'm very thankful to E! because I learned, really learned how to read without anxiety. Wow. And so, but like when I still- On television.

On television. That's a lot on your shoulders. But, yeah, yeah. But I don't think I would have, I needed that sort of fire under my ass because I wouldn't have done it. That's how it is with most of my – like the motivation. And like when I book a stand-up show, I'll be like, you have this thing coming up. You better be prepared for it. And then it forces me to prepare.

It's great. Do you remember any time – It's a good system for life, guys. That's my Tony Robbins. Like, first, get the gig, be totally unprepared, and at the last second, freak out, and then run on stage for an hour. That's how you get rich. Yeah, that's rich. Is there any moment that sticks out from, like, adolescent school that really was just so embarrassing.

I had this friend from Baltimore, and he was a real asshole. They all are, man. They all are. Embarrassing. Like, something that sticks in your mind that you, to this day, you remember about your dyslexia and how it affected you. I was in a play in fifth grade. It was more of a – so it was on stage, but it was reading. We weren't off book.

And we – I forget what the play was. It was like we're doing a stage reading. And they knew I liked acting, and they knew in class that I was a very animated student. And they were like, Joel, you'll be great for the lead. And I was in – so – but then we would do the – and I was like,el you'll be great for the lead and i was in so but then we would do the lot and i was like this is gonna go great and it was a fucking disaster and then the next day i couldn't be there and this guy named kevin rooney who i'm friends with today who lives in pittsburgh uh go seahawks what uh go ravens no uh no go see no No. And so he read my part the next day, and they're like, man, Kevin was so much better.

I'm like, you know, like, he read all the words. He knew all the words. He nailed it. It's like he could read. It's like he could read. It wasn't just a guy mumbling around. Yeah, I mean, some of those soup things. I remember John Oliver appeared in the beginning.

So some days would be good, and some days would be bad. He appeared on the soup and we were in New York and he was like, what is going on? I'm like, oh, I'm horribly dyslexic. And he's like, you have kept this a very good secret. I'm like, yeah. But there wasn't a moment where people were like, Judas. There wasn't a moment where people were like, Judas. You know, there wasn't like a thing like that. I just felt stupid.

And it always like, it breaks my heart because I literally, because I think about all the kids out there that are in these education systems that are designed for a certain kind of student that is a very narrow slice, again. And there's all these smart, interesting kids that are, I'm sure they feel stupid. And because I felt stupid and I was told in second grade that I was a slow starter. A teacher told you that? Like a person that ran studies on me. Because my parents were like,

what's wrong with them? And they were like, he's a slow starter. I mean, literally told me I was slow. But I kind of took that to, you forget what affects you as a kid. And I was like, okay. So that means I start off slow, but towards the end, I'll pass everybody. I'm a strong finisher, yeah.

So, you know, like in high school, I ended up like getting almost straight A's because I figured out how to work their system. But that, you know, that like mentality, when I moved here, I'm like, I'm going to figure this thing out. I'm not just going to, I'm going to figure out how to get to work, to be solvent in this business. I'm going to figure it out. And that's, so that definitely made me work harder and all that. But the shame and the feeling stupid sucked and is bad. And I feel so bad for all the kids out there that – and I can't stand it when I see – like every commercial and every school and every business goes like, we're thinking out of the box.

We're doing all these things. And it's always the exact opposite. You figured out how to do math a different way and fuck all the parents up. That's what you fucking did. Yeah. So, yeah, I was terrible at math too. Me all of it. Geometry was fine.

I could do that, strangely. That's interesting. Like literally I had a math teacher go, hey man, you're like algebra. He took such pity on me. And he was a great teacher, Mr. Simpson. And I was so good at, Mr. Simpson. I was so good at... He was like, are you cheating

at geometry? I'm like, I'm actually not if you can believe that. I've cheated at everything else, but not this guy. Then trigonometry was so bad that I just fell off. That was like another language for me. It really was. Math, once it got beyond geometry and into algebra too and you got letters and shit,

A's and B's and X's and Y's. I'm like, I'm done. Forget it. No. And I, for, yeah, I don't, I mean, that is not, thank God for those people because they built everything. Yeah. But I, when I got to college, I had to take a class for no credit.

It was a math class. It was a high school math class in college to get into college math. So I was taking this in college. And, like, I looked at my mom was like, you're not taking a full schedule. I'm like, no, no, no, no. Look, I'm taking four classes. This one's just not worth anything. And she's like, why?

And she goes, because I couldn't get out of high school math. That was the one, like it was hard to cheat in high school math. And so I was flunking the high school college course. And the teacher was like, the high school math college course to get into college. I was already in college. I mean, this is a time when the University of Washington was easy to get into. Sorry, University of Washington, but it was much easier back then. Now I know when I tell people like, oh, good for you. I'm like, you got in with that 860? Or 850 or whatever you said? They had this equation

that worked and they're like, great. Does he have money? Yes. But it was in-state tuition. But I, the teacher, the math teacher was like, hey, are you going to, like, he pulled me aside and he's like, are you going to take a degree that requires math? And I was like, fuck, no. I don't even want to be – I don't want to get out of here.

He was like, okay, good. I'm going to pass you. No. Do not take math. And I was like, great. Advising you not to do this. And I did. And then I took –

That's a good teacher, though, for real. Yeah, it was good. I had to take one math. I took the philosophy of logic, which I realized was actually harder, and I got the test in advance and would just very lightly write the answers out on the scratch paper. And then I always made sure that I got B minuses. You're right. That's the way to do it.

C pluses, B minuses. Don't overdo it. Don't draw attention to it. This kid's acing it. No. I remember being in that class and a girl was cheating and she got caught

and was thrown out of school. And I was like, loser. It was a big deal in college. When I went to Towson, they had, I remember it was a yellow fucking letter that went out to every

person that it was all about cheating yeah all about cheating and how you'll be there are no second chances you're out all that wow all right so here's what i want to know you're a parent obviously now how many kids do you have two boys okay have you passed your dyslexia on? Yes, I have. To both? You're welcome, Eddie. One of them kind of has some a little bit, but Eddie definitely has it. How old are they? 16 and 13. Okay.

Eddie is like a math whiz. Eddie is 16 or 13? 16. Okay, but he definitely has it. Oh, yeah, he definitely has it. has it. Oh yeah, he definitely has it. When he got diagnosed, because we had him tested,

the woman who did the testing, the doctor, she was like, she started describing all his symptoms, like all the things that are dyslexic. And I'm like, oh, that's me. And she was like, oh yeah, I was wondering which one it was. Because I had never gotten a fully

real diagnosis. I just kind of knew it. So you're getting it through your son's diagnosis. Yeah, but I'm like, oh! And she's like, oh, okay, great. So anyway, that's a really nice gift I gave them. And are there new things now?

Do you see an advancement in the teaching or understanding in however many years it's been since you were in high school? There's no cure. I don't mean that, but I mean are there better ways to understand this and teach kids and help them better than just being like, don't do math, here's a B. Well, there are ways, but traditional American educational systems still don't. Still the same shit.

Pretty much the same shit, but there are all sorts. Now it's like celebrated. Like there's the Dyslexic Advantage book. There's ways to read on a Kindle that will read aloud to you while it highlights the words. Is that right? There's all these cool, like you'll never get cured of it, but you can figure out methods and ways to proceed that you can get better and faster at it. Okay. No doubt.

And I am such a – compared to what I was, I mean, just like anything, practice really helps. There are apps that really you can go through and – is it training you to see things a different way or think differently? Some people, like, wear sunglasses. No joke. They'll wear a blue lens or a yellow lens. You just never know. I went Audible. And that helps with the –

For some kids. Oh, wow. I mean, and what would be great of a school is allow kids to read – I mean, allow kids to have just more time to read. But with Audible, I've gone back and read all these classic books because they were all assigned. I read none of them. But I read all Dostoevsky because it's great other than having to keep track of all the names and the nicknames. But I've gone back and it's been a revelation and I tear through books now. I was talking to Dax Shepard does the same thing where it's all the way. That's how I get like people. It's people like what podcast do you listen to and i was like definitely not the

honeydew but uh but uh no i'm like i just read book i mean now it's just i feel like i'm catching up and it's so glorious to to read all these books that i never read that's great i love that you've gone back and done it not just and looked at it like this thing like, eh. No, yeah, I love it. It's also inspiring to your kids to see, you know, especially that you've struggled with this and you still struggle with this. I think that's important for them to see.

I mean, they're just as sarcastic as I am, so they're like, thanks, asshole. Appreciate this gift, dad. No, and my mom, when I start bringing it up, like if I bring up like when we were talking about Eddie to her about his dyslexia, she was, and I'd be like, and I have dyslexia. And then my mom always gets really defensive, and she was like, well, you did okay for yourself. Yeah, I cheated. And I'm like, no, mom, I'm not, because I think she thinks it's her fault.

And I'm like, dad, you haven't. And he's like, eh, you haven't. And he's like, I don't know. And I was like, you know. And then they'll admit, but my mom always bursts out crying. I'm like, it's okay. Like she did a bad job as a parent. Yes, I'll be like, yes, but I do, even though I'm driving a Turbo S Porsche, it's gorgeous.

I definitely can't read that fast. Yes, do I have a guest house? Yes, Mom, that's guest house? Yes, mom. That's true. You haven't paid for dinner since 2005. All that is true, and it's gone well, thank God. But listen,

I definitely don't read fast. My older brother has it too, and he's an electrician, so but that doesn't, I mean, obviously it requires reading, but he spends most of his time trying not to blow himself up yeah you've had you've really taken an occupation that has certainly challenged your fucking weakness yeah no and and i i uh i have that is my uh probably my suicidal wish is But I love standing on stage, and I love that pressure. I love that feeling.

There's nothing better. It's instant, good or bad. It's immediate. It's not, I shot this movie. It'll be out in a year. We did this podcast. It'll be out in a week or whatever. It is immediate feedback in the fucking room, good or bad.

It's immediate. There's nothing like that. There is, yes, it is a high that I crave, and I mean, I love acting. I mean, that was my first love, and so I love seeing, I do love that process and figuring that out, but that wonderful pressure is just, I crave it. I got, Ohio University, I crave it. I got Ohio University. I was like, I wanted to hug every one of them because I'm so happy that crowds are back.

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Now, let's get back to the do. Well, let's talk about you being a dad because there is something i i want to hear this story yeah i saw it on your social not too long ago it was an anniversary i think maybe or you posted of it or something you were remembering uh i for it was a different it was another podcast joe rogan uh no smaller show it was yeah uh no it was it was this uh it was like this meditation podcast where they you just they had they write out – I kind of told them my story, and then they were like, we wrote it out for you, and then I did my version. And they just kind of do like, this is what happened. And so they posted that, and I had never – I had talked about it, but I had never sort of laid it out.

And then I wanted to ask Eddie. I was like, hey, is it okay if I talk about it because he's 16 now and uh and he doesn't mind um because i pay him every time jerk no uh so yeah it was uh so my son had open heart surgery when he was two months old and uh months two months yeah it, that's just her firstborn. Firstborn. And you're a brand new fucking dad. And when, what do they tell you? Why does he have to have this? Well, he, cause you're home at this point.

You're obviously. Well, yeah. And, and, but we, so my wife, um, she had post, uh, postpartum and, you know, like as a new mom, you're wanting to feed your child and he wasn't really latching on to her nipple and then they were like it's gonna be fine and we're trying all these different ways and he's a very skinny kid at that point and then she reads failure to thrive on like the charts and she just glanced at it and that sent her and me into like, oh, shit. And so we bring him home, and he eats a little bit, but he keeps falling asleep every time he eats. Like he'll start eating and then just sleep. And I'm like, is that normal?

And people are like, yeah, it's your baby, but it would be in like 10 seconds or less. And then she took him to, you know, for a checkup, and the doctor just heard that the heartbeat was not normal. And we went right to a cardiologist or a heart specialist, and they put the thing up there, and there was – They were stressing out over here. Yeah, and there was a two-month-old baby heart, and people were going to – Yes, this thing. Yes. This thing here.

And that – How big is the heart for real oh and a baby oh yeah two months like oh yeah like a walnut god and uh yeah i don't know how people it's not even that's what i'm saying how do you it's not even big enough to work on i feel like yeah we it feels like that and then they do some guys are eating a sandwich and doing it and shit. They're like, oh, no, I got this. That's all right. Well, that is, yeah, because once they,

when we had, well, the guy, I'll get to that, but the guy was like, oh, yeah, he needs it. And he, they're not, you're born with holes in your heart, but they close as you're,

like in the first couple months. He was like, this is huge. He'll be, this will be irreparable damage by the time he's uh four between four and eight and he'll be probably dead by 20. and uh you just can't you just can't it's just too much too much stress on something damaged like that and um this is where i learned that sleep deprivation is the finest of tortures because we had to, they're

like, you have to feed him every four hours and you have to feed and the feedings because he was so weak would take two hours. So, but it had to be every four hours. So you'd feed for two hours, another two hours would go by and you're like, time to feed again. And that was around the clock. And I was doing the soup for how long? Two months. Wow. So they, we were just like, we were, I remember trying to, I was driving home from E at, I was living in, we lived in Glendale at the time. And I would see people on the highway. I would see shapes.

And I'd be like, because I don't really get, when I get tired, it doesn't manifest itself with sleepiness to me. I begin to hallucinate. Okay. And then I was having heart palpitations. Like, my heartbeat was all over the place. And the doctor, I did all these, I did a heart test and I did all this stuff. And he's like, yeah, you just need, like, sleep. He's like, when's the last time you slept eight hours?

I'm like, I don't remember. And so we took him in and there was, we hadn't, you know, he kept, we were trying to get him to gain weight and he wasn't really gaining weight. And he's like, we should just do the surgery as soon as possible. So we brought him into the LA Children's Hospital, which is a miracle place. And we got this guy named Dr. Von Starnes who was known for how fast he was. And they open him up. I mean, when you give away- Wait, hold on a second. Yeah, it was crazy. Hold on a second.

Crazy times. Yeah, where are you emotionally handing your brand new child over to these people to work? Do they tell you there's a chance this doesn't work? Oh yeah, you sign all that stuff. over to these people to work. Do they tell you there's a chance this doesn't work? Oh, yeah. You sign all that stuff. But does someone talk to you about the risks? Have they told you, hey, we can fix this and he'll be fine, good to go?

And are they telling you that at the first? Oh, yeah. They tell you because he had two holes, which is different than the veins and the muscle and chambers that aren't there. It is the simplest of the open heart surgeries if there is. I hear you on that, yes. So, and later on when we were in the recovery floor, like meeting kids with heart transplants,

the parents said to us, they'd be like, oh, we were hoping it was that. And then you realize, oh, wait, we're the lucky ones here and you don't think about that. And so with the veins and the ventricles, that's multiple surgeries, and quality of life can be affected. And how long is this procedure? You and your wife sitting at this hospital freaking the fuck out, waiting?

Oh, yeah. I mean, you're doing – but the moment when you give away your kid, they start giving him the drugs to put him to sleep. You can't believe it. I mean, it's so surreal and no fun. And you can't – I mean, all that time is kind of a blur because I'd never slept. But you think about, like, oh, you put him in the car seat. You're driving him to the hospital.

You're going to be there. We knew we slept over that night, but, um, so you give your kid away and they said, it's going to take about two hours. And we knew we were sitting in the cafeteria, uh, and we're waiting, still waiting to hear how it went and how it's going. And my mom's there and our friend, our good friend, the great actor, going and my mom's there and our friend our good friend the great actor Pamela Reed is there and yeah so we my wife was like well I think the surgery is over and we're like how do you know because because the doctor's eating a sandwich and uh it was him he didn't even come over to see something he didn't well he didn't see us okay all right yeah and well then we learned

later on because the the, it takes more time. Now they crack the, I don't even think they crack the chest as much anymore. Now they just go through the sides. But when they crack the chest, that takes all the time. But the actual surgery, because this guy was famous for it, continues to be, was 15 minutes. That's it? Because he's so fast. He goes, done.

And then they. Then that closes the valve. It closes up. Because the more time you're open, the more time you're on the ventilator, the more time you're – but their kids are so dang resilient. And so then it was a success. And we all were crying and so happy. But then there was – so they do multiple surgeries a day. surgeries a day and um the kid who was right after us who was like he was like five months old uh he had a valve replaced a pig with a pig valve which didn't work and he died no uh and because i

remember our you were in there when they like told the family so we're all you're all in the same area, but I saw, I remember our doctor going, the surrounding parts of the valve, he was like their hamburger. I remember hearing that. He said there was nothing to sew into and there was nothing for it to hold onto. So then we watched them, the Dr doctor starnes walk into the waiting room where they were

and closed the door you know to tell them it didn't work and their whole family was there the grandparents and you know it was one of those like you're like elevators going up and down and uh it was just uh god tragedy anxiety my chest right now thinking about yeah it was fucking crazy and then then your kid then they have this room where all the kids who are recovering from surgeries they're all around this one nurse and the nurse just sits at this desk all night long and she's like don, don't worry, you guys go, because there's rooms for the parents to sleep in. And she was like, this is the one night or two nights you're going to be perfectly fine

because I'll be watching your kid the whole time. I'm like, great. And that was the most sleep my wife and I had gotten in. You just collapsed. I remember it was a quiet room with no windows. And I was like, I want to sleep here forever. And then, ironically, he's still recovering. And they gave him a little bit too much pain medicine.

And his heart stopped. No. What do you mean? Or excuse me, his heart didn't stop. He stopped breathing. And our friend, Kim, was in there at that time when it happened she walked on she's like eddie's not breathing and we run in of course and what they do is they give you this counter medicine that removes all the pain medicine and then eddie woke up like

they were like he's gonna feel he's gonna be real pissed in a second and he was because he was in pain you know like what the fuck happened yeah now he's in pain yeah he's two months old two months old and then you take you get him home and this is when you're on the recovery floor and you realize so like as i said the parents were saying um you know like we wish we had that surgery but But then you're on that floor and you see little kids with like bowel replacements and heart transplants and all the different organs that kids, you know, that are come out damaged or they don't have them. And then you were like, you'll be like, oh, thank you for this version. And then when people are like, oh, I'm so sorry this happened to you.

I'm like, you know what? It's on the, we live in a great city with a great hospital. It is a great hospital. And you're so fortunate and so lucky and all that. So, yeah, then you take him home and you still have to feed him all the time. And he did, you know, his energy changed a lot, but we're still doing the soup and we were still feeding him all the time i mean having a two-month-old is already hard as shit what you have a two-month-old who's fresh out of open fucking heart surgery what is that like being a parent to that you know it's like you get used

to anything practically and you're like is there any sort of do you have to clean the wound or the stitches or anything is it like what do they close you with staples or stitches when you're that little

they I think they they use some of I mean they use stitches they have to put the bones back together some of it's glued

back together so his scar he's got a zipper but he's got two little places where like the drainage tube but they're not really detectable anymore. And so you just kind of go like, what's the next step?

And the fact that he went well was just kind of like. Right. We got it from here. Yeah. And I think the most nerve wracking thing was like driving home. Like don't get into a car accident. Yeah, and I think the most nerve-wracking thing was driving home. Don't get into a car accident.

And that was having a child. Nothing made me more nervous than they're like, she's yours now. Go home. And that drive home. I was slowing down at fucking green lights expecting it to turn red. You know what I mean? Like, oh, God. Oh, God. Yeah.

That was really terrifying to drive a brand-new human person home. Right. All of a sudden, the stakes went through the roof. Went through the roof. Going from nothing to lose to everything to lose. That's why when I see dads that ride motorcycles, I'm going to be like, you are a brave person. You have a lot at stake. Yeah, you do.

And I remember someone saying, I was thinking about getting a motorcycle in my late teens. And they were like, yeah, this is the time to do it. Why? I was like, well, you don't have kids. And so, you know, if you're dead, it doesn't really, the stakes aren't as high. I'm like, you know what, I'm not going to get one. I'm just going to pedal.

Just not going to get one. Like, Dak Sheppard, he's still riding. I mean, he's like a freaking super racer. But he put a hole in his shoulder that was like this big. And I was like, good for you, man. I can't do it. Yeah, I had a motorcycle for like two – I kept it for two years, rode it for like two summers.

And I have no – I'll never forget the moment I was like, man, fuck this. We were on the 695 Beltway, and I'm riding home to my grandmother's place. I'm on this bike, 70 miles an hour, and I'm right here next to an 18-wheeler. And the tire's right there. And you know that little float in the middle? And I'm just right next to this thing, and I'm just looking at it like,

I am nothing. I am nothing. If this guy accidentally, I'm done. I'm getting sucked done, and that was it for me. I was like, fuck this. I feel so naked and beyond vulnerable, and I'm hearing that tire like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm right next to it. I was like, no, fuck that.

No way. There's 18 of them. I'm good. When I got to California, I lived in Seattle, grew up in Seattle. But when the motorcycle's riding between traffic and I was like, this is crazy here. What is this crazy place? How can they do this? I remember

talking to a cop about it and I was like, what happened? They're like, it's mostly your fault if you merge. I'm like, what are you doing? The cop was like, stay the fuck away from them. It's jarring to not know. I remember seeing it. I still have my motorcycle license. I just took the fucking test to them it's it's it's jarring to not know like i remember seeing it i still have my motorcycle license i just took the fucking test to take it and i passed it and i was

like oh whatever it's still it's class c class m1 but it says on the test it's legal to split the lane but not recommended it says it right there like you do it, but we're telling you we don't. It's legal, but we don't recommend this. And when you first get here, you can't do it. I don't know anywhere else you can do that. And these guys come through with those loud-ass fucking Harleys. I've had them beat on the side of my car if they thought I was a little too close to their lane when they go by. Boom. And it's terrifying.

Like, what the fuck was that? Yeah. Yeah, you got guys. I mean. And they're wide harleys dude they're not dirt bikes squeezing through here these guys some of them are really fucking good though some of them well yeah they're experts they better be good because one mistake it's it's over that's what i think all the time you're gonna split that lane for 25 miles you know like fuck

that i'm i'm i used to be a motorcycle, very briefly. But even knowing I had a bike and knowing what's out there, I'm still – I've been guilty sometimes of signaling as I change. Right. Click and I'm going. And that's all it takes for one of these zooms to come by and you're done. And then I just killed you. Right. I killed you. I checked my mirror.

I mean, thank God now for technology that lets you know. Yeah, the beeps and all that. Yeah, especially out here. That has helped me. I see that flashing fucking shit in the mirror, and I'm like, oh, here comes a motorcycle that I would have never seen. I had a guy. I had a guy. You'll like this.

I'm sitting. This is maybe like five years ago. I'm sitting on the 101. It was before my daughter 101 right around laurel canyon going toward hollywood okay it's bumper to bumper i'm not moving i'm in a cherokee a jeep cherokee and um all of a sudden this fucking car what i think is a car hits me from behind i'm like us you know not paying attention probably text and we're all creeping and then i look up my rear view, and there's a line of cars as if they're starting a race that are a good 30 yards behind me, but they're all right there. And everyone on the freeway is now stopped, and everyone else in front of me is gone.

I'm like, what the fuck's going on? And I look at my side view, and I see a motorcycle rider down. He's running to me, trying to split the lane. But I was sitting still i didn't wasn't my fault but the guy crashes and i'm like oh holy fuck and everyone is i get out on the freeway we're not pulled to the side and i'm like dude are you okay he's like help me pick up my bike i'm like are you okay i don't think you should get up are you okay help me get my bike to the side i'm okay so i pull my car over and i help him get the bike to the side. And then it's just like, fuck them.

And here goes everybody. Everybody. And we're out there. Like when I'm still helping him, they're flying by 70 miles an hour. We're in the lane. So the guys, I'm like, are you okay? You know, can I call 911? He's like, I think I'm okay.

And he gets on his bike. He's like, let me just see if this thing works. And the motherfucker starts it and takes off. And I'm like dude and i'm yelling at him because i i think he's definitely concussed right but probably on drugs or something from the night before i'm guessing too the way he was probably in shock in shock and he just takes off and i can't chase him or follow him because he's splitting lanes and gone i was like these fucking you're insane dude probably didn't have insurance probably just getting the fuck out of there right yeah and that's why yeah i tell my kids i'll be like look you're not doing it while you're living here uh that's what my dad

used to say and not under my roof it's my house but uh but i was like just so you know i mean i was like it's cool i get it it's the It's the freedom, all that ride free, all that. But a pothole, when I hit a pothole in quadriplegic, yeah, in the Land Cruiser or even the Porsche, I'll be like, I'll be, my phone call will not be interrupted. Even when I hit them out here, I'm like, damn, even in a car, I'm like, damn. Like, damn. And that's the end of it. But if you hit that on a motorcycle, your life could change forever.

And I was like, you may never use your leg properly again after that. That's right. You're going to smack your head in. So, yeah, I got to hand it to them. I'd rather start smoking. That's probably less dangerous. Yeah. Yeah, probably.

But your son is okay now? Has no – he's good to go? Yeah. Can he play sports? Can he do all the things? Oh, he's got – yeah, no. The only thing he has to do – Yeah, is there anything you have to be careful about?

The only thing you have to do is like early on in his life, you take antibiotics before you go to the dentist. before you go to the dentist. Because when you free plaque, it can somehow, I don't think it, in theory it could, I don't know how it works, but that was what we had to do.

He is on the autism spectrum, so he's a very not typical kid, not interested in sports. He does like the Seahawks, thank God. So we've gone to a few games but um but yeah very different kid and he's like it's gonna be my size oh he is a big kid yeah he's already he's already i don't know he's probably six feet now damn is he really yeah so he's he's big uh he's a big kid um and my 13 year old-old is also going to be big. All right, so this is interesting.

Your son is 16 now, right? Yeah. All right, so I mentioned before we started that first-time guests, I always ask them advice that you would give to your 16-year-old self. Buy a motorcycle. I mean, this could really be advice you're giving not only to you, but your son as well. I mean, he's exactly that age right now

what would you say oh what what would i say to me to 16 year old joel mckale what would you say right now with the benefit of hindsight stop jumping off shit why didn't you get hurt yeah no i was i have i've had like six seven concussions and a skull fracture. Have you really? Yeah. From what? Jumping and shit? Ironically, I played football and I didn't really ever get a true concussion playing football. Yes, did I get my bell rung and did every practice I felt slightly drunk at the end? So, yes, I did. But like the number of times that I was like, I'm going to jump off this roof and smack my head.

And do dumb shit. And then I fractured my skull skiing, which I don't, I still, I don't have a memory of the day. But so that's not like, I don't have this like, hey, breathe, okay? Take time to enjoy. You know, I don't have that. But I was like, don't jump off shit. All right. And I'm trying to think of advice that I would be nice.

Yeah, be nice. That's great advice. Yeah. Just be nice to everybody. Well, dude, thank you so much for coming on and talking about that. Definitely do. Yeah. Will you please promote whatever you'd like again, everything, anything you'd like?

I'm going to be in Baltimore on September 30th. At the... Where are you playing in Baltimore? At the Famous. You're not where I'm at. Trust me. Oh, I guarantee we'd be at the same places. How many seats is that? 300.

How many shows are you doing? One now, but if it sells, I'll do another. It'll sell. I guess watch Stargirl. Watch Crime Scene Kitchen. What's Stargirl on? It's on the CW, but it's on the DC app. I think that's where most people get it.

It's very popular with teenagers and teenage gals, but I get to work with – it's a great cast, but Luke Wilson's on it and Amy Smart's on it, and working with him is like – I'm a big Amy Smart, but Luke Wilson was in the Royal Tannenbaums and Bottle Rocket. In old school. Yeah. People forget about him in old school. He's amazing.

Straight guy in old school. I mean, Idiocracy is a masterpiece. And after knowing him for a bit, I was just like, hey, just so you know, I'm a gigantic fan. Yeah. Like, when do you – And he's like, oh, okay. Got it. Yeah. Okay, Joel. Sure, like when you... And he's like, oh, okay. Got it. Okay, Joel. Sure,

buddy. Great. Big fan. That's good. Oh, yeah. I heard all about it. So, yeah. What else? I don't know. I'm doing some stand-up. Yeah. So I'm gonna... I'm trying to think of anything. Yeah. So just, yeah.

JoelMcHale.com for dates, stand-up dates, live dates. Yeah, go there. All right. That's great. Thank you again for coming on for real. No, Ryan, thank you. You are a seriously thoughtful person. Thank you, my man.

And as always, Ryan Sickler on all social media, RyanSickler.com. We'll talk to you all next week. Thank you.