The HoneyDew with Ryan Sickler - Nick Thune - HoneyThune

Episode Date: September 12, 2022

My HoneyDew this week is comedian, Nick Thune! (Love Life, Netflix) Nick Highlights the Lowlights of addiction and multiple stints in rehab. SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE and watch full episodes of The Dew every toozdee! https://www.youtube.com/rsickler  SUBSCRIBE TO MY PATREON, The HoneyDew with Y’all, where I Highlight the Lowlights with Y’all! You now get audio and video of The HoneyDew a day early, ad-free at no additional cost! It’s only $5/month! Sign up for a year and get a month free! https://www.patreon.com/TheHoneyDew  SPONSORS: Blueland -Get 15% off your first order at https://www.Blueland.com/HONEYDEW  Mindbloom -Get $100 off your first six sessions when you go to https://www.Mindbloom.com/HONEYDEW  Zippix -Go to https://www.ZippixToothpicks.com and use code HONEYDEW to save 10% off your order (MUST be 21+ to order) Babbel -Save up to 60% off your subscription when you go to https://www.Babbel.com/HONEYDEW 

Vancouver I'll be at the House of Comedy September 15th through the 17th tickets available at ryansickler.com I got my passport and my knife heads ready let's go y'all woo Edmonton September 29th through October 1st and Chicago I will see you all November 11th and 12th

get tickets to all shows on my website at ryansickler.com The Honeydew with ryan sickler welcome back to the honeydew y'all we're over here doing it in the Nightpant Studios. I am Ryan Sickler. RyanSickler.com. Ryan Sickler on all your social media. And as always, thank you for supporting this show.

The community is continuing to grow and grow. I love you guys for it. If you're watching on YouTube, please hit that subscribe button. It helps. It means nothing to you and everything to us, all right? Also, if you want more, the Patreon's out there. It's called The Honeydew With Y'all. I'm highlighting the lowlights with y'all.

And y'all got the craziest fucking stories I've ever heard in my life. All right. It's five bucks a month. If you sign up for a year, you get over a month free. You get The Honeydew a day early. You get it ad free at no additional cost. All right. If you or somebody you know has a story that has to be heard,

please submit it to honeydewpodcast at gmail.com. Hopefully we'll get to do an episode together. All right? That's the biz there. You guys know the tour is still rolling on. I can't thank you enough for your support there. Vancouver, September 15th through the 17th. Edmonton, September 29th through October 1st.

Chicago, November 11th and the 12th. All right. That's the business. You guys know what we do over here. We highlight the lowlights. I say all the time, these are the stories behind the storytellers. I am very excited to have this guest on. First time here on The Do, ladies and gentlemen.

Please welcome Nick Doon. Welcome to the honeydew, Nick Doon. Thank you. Thank you for being here, Nick. Yeah. That was a big intro. I appreciate it. You're welcome.

I'm excited. I like what I do. I love that was a big intro. I appreciate it. You're welcome. I'm excited. I like what I do. I love my guests. I like what their stories are. And you're no exception, young man. I said to you when you walked up, like, dude, just fucking hang this comedy shit up, model. Why are you fucking around?

You said something to me before that. You saw me do something quite miraculous, I would say. First of all, let's give you props. So back in the day, am I allowed to talk about this? Nick, you can tell me if I can't, did a Honda commercial, okay? Okay, yeah. And Honda and he went back and forth on negotiations and Nick was like, eh, and was like, what about a new car? And they wanted him to take a Honda Fit and he's like, how tall are you? Six what? Six four. Six four. 5'16 in Canada. 5'16 in Canada. And he was like, now I'm how tall are you six what four four six four five sixteen in Canada five sixteen in Canada and uh he was like now I'm gonna need that Honda Ridgeline and they gave him a Honda Ridgeline and

I'm a big fan of the Honda Ridgeline I've driven one my cousin has one and this motherfucker parallel parked beautifully like I've had no idea anyone was watching it was just honestly just for me I'm just out there having a little smoke watching them. It was on Santa Monica Boulevard. It wasn't like a simple neighborhood street where I could just take cars are coming. Pressure. And it was a one and done. One and done.

And then I look over and guess who watched the whole thing happen? It was not only a one and done. It was a one and done to where I landed with both tires on the curb. And properly cocked because you will get a ticket out here for some assholes that don't like that shit. Yeah, the thing was already like that. Left. Like, boom, all you got to do is turn it off, put it in fucking park,

you're good to go. I didn't even have to change the steering to get out of that spot, which I did get out because you let me know that there was a free spot. Yeah, don't pay this city $70. Not after you park like that. A lot of people. They don't deserve your money after you do that. No park like that a lot of people deserve your money after you know i think a lot of people that have a bigger ego would say no that parking job i can't

move it but for me it was like i'll throw that away i don't care if you would have took it if you would have took 20 minutes to get in and out of it like just stay just fucking stay just stay it's gonna be an hour before you get out. All right. Before we begin, please plug, promote everything. Well, I was trying to figure out my dates, but all I got right now is October 8th, Chicago at the Den Theater, which is going to be just a brilliant show. I've got like some European stuff I think coming up that I haven't nailed down yet. But how's your European audience? I mean, London's really supportive yeah um i would say london's very supportive i don't know about how much any more europe over there australia is super supportive yeah not europe but still yeah outside of the u.s you'd be surprised about europe you know because there's

americans there that are using like local codes on their computers to gain things. I see. And so you're probably getting pinged that someone in Arizona is watching it, but really it's some hot chick in Paris. Ooh, wee wee. All right. You're here to – actually, real quick, just where can they get all your dates? Whenever they're coming to see you, what's your website? Where do they go?

You know, my website's been having troubles. That's going to be the theme of this episode. My self-promotion is, I mean, I post everything on Instagram. So that's kind of it. I have like a daily relationship with my Instagram followers. Okay. And I'll let people know about dates on there. Usually I put it all together in a tour, post the tour,

put like a little flyer, poster, whatever. I put a lot of care into that stuff. But you'd think if I did that I would have my website dialed in. Well, you did something that just sparked my memory right now a while back where I thought was really interesting. Didn't you promote on a billboard? Didn't you buy a billboard and promote? That's what a lot of people think.

That's what they think. What was it? I hired a graphic designer. And this was, I think there was Instagram, but it wasn't. It was mostly Twitter. Yeah, it was early. It was a while ago. And I made this whole story up where I got Comedy Central gave me $1,000 to promote my special.

And I decided to do it on or netflix netflix gave me a thousand bucks and i decided to do like the one billboard i could afford which is on like a freeway in central oregon somewhere yeah and just like posted it but you know it's good when like comedians are like man that's cool it's like oh you couldn't tell that that was obviously fake you know but like i created kind of a whole story around it and then some people were like i wish i would have just kept thinking it was real because it seems kind of like you're a liar now and so i had to deal with that fallout yeah with friends fallout um all right i know we're going to talk about rehab today, and I know everyone sends their topics in before. You say rehab at 17.

That's really early to go to rehab. So let's talk about what leads us there. You're originally from Seattle, I know. And what's your upbringing like? Very, you know, I would say like the lowest of middle class in a neighborhood where people are more upper middle class you know but they're i think it was also people that weren't too flashy with their money you know in this neighborhood but like all my friends were walking around in jordans and and stuff you know even though their houses weren't like insane but like back then that

was a big deal to have jordan's i never i never had a pair no i wanted a pair so bad and my mom showed up with a pair of the shaquille o'neal's that she got on sale at like nordstrom or something i remember those just like black ripping the bill my back board down black and purple suede suede like i mean and i was the kid that like i grew i became 6'4 when i was like 15 damn did you really had the feet of somebody that was 6'4 when I was like 15. Damn, did you really? But I had the feet of somebody that was 6'4 when I was like 11. So you grew into your feet. Yeah, those Shaquille O'Neal. It's like a puppy. When you see a puppy with big feet, you're like, oh, they're going to turn out all right.

But yeah, so I had these huge moon boots on. But I think that was also kind of what led me down this path was everything I got wasn't as good as my friends. And everyone around was pretty materialistic in the sense of a starter jacket you know all the things that like mattered at that age i know the dumbest shit like you i'm you're speaking to me because i never had a real pair of vans they were always a knockoff checker pair but they weren't vans we never had jams they were a big pair of uh – Shorts. Board shorts.

Yeah. So my mom would sew shit, like make her own from Joanne Faber. She was like, Jesus Christ, they're ripping and shit. Like, come on, man. Everybody knows you make jams. Come on. Everyone thinks these are jellies. Mams.

It was always secondhand or knockoff or, you know, just – And back then, stores – well, shit, it was Kmart, and they had stuff called McGregor. You know what I mean? Now Target's got fucking Tony Hawk and quality shit that you're not going to get bullied for and get your ass kicked because you don't have the cool stuff anymore. I mean, and one story that I always remember is my dad took me out to get a baseball glove and he took me, it was called Olympic sports. I don't even know if those still exist up in the Northwest, but, and I came home and it was probably a $40 baseball glove. And it was the same one my friends had. And I was so excited. And I think I was home for five minutes before my mom put me in her car, drove me back, returned it, and then got the cheapest one they had and then brought me back home.

Oh, that's brutal. And it was just, you know, like it was like I know my dad. Just the taste, that glory. I know. Like my dad wanted me to have what I wanted, you know, like because he wanted me to feel like I wasn't like at a different class than the other people. But then my mom was like realistic and like, no, we're about to go bankrupt. So he's going to get every dollar counts around here. But I was embarrassed about that kind of stuff.

Me too. Really. Were you a free lunch kid? No. My mom made my lunch every day. Oh, I didn't get the free lunches. I don't think they even had those. I was in a suburb of Seattle.

It was where Microsoft is. And Microsoft was just starting then. Okay, so not Microsoft like today. No, it was the beginnings. But it was turning. You could see it turning. But all of them were slightly better at sports than me. Actually, not slightly better. I was a good athlete comparative to regular people, but they were the elite. Like they all played college something or other. They were all on the all-star teams. They all played varsity when they were freshmen. Like they all were the guys. And here I was like the one that was like part of the group that wasn't quite, you know.

was like part of the group that wasn't quite, you know. And so when junior high hit, I started to realize there was other ways to get attention, you know, besides being a good athlete, it was just being sociable, you know, and being kind of a daredevil in the sense of like jumping off bridges into rivers. And like, you know, I just decided at one point, like, despite my fear, I'm going to be the first to do everything when it comes to risky behavior. Like there was a bridge that everyone jumped off of and all my friends were like, oh, and we get up there and they all stand there. And I would just like, I just made a decision, you're jumping in the first 10 seconds. When people aren't even waiting, people don't even know you're going to jump, you're going to jump. Because the reputation that that's going to give

you will suffice and fill you for the one that you're lacking with the athletes. How high up is the bridge? This bridge was, it's funny because you could jump off the bottom of it or you could climb up to a really dangerous type thing. It's like my summers. We had the metal rafters that were under. The top was 100 feet from the street. And then there was a good chunk, maybe 50 feet, 60 feet from these metal rafters that went down. Well, and this one wasn't even that big because we were pretty young still. I would say it was like 30 feet, you know?

And then where I was jumping off was like 40. But I wasn't doing flips or anything. I would just be the first guy. I could never do a flip. Like I look back and it's like, why was my dad not having me in backflip training from the age of two? Backflip training.

You know what I mean? Every kid should be in backflip training from the age of two. Backflip training. You know what I mean? Every kid should be in backflip training because that is something you'll take with you your whole, you know, like. Till you're 40. In your, you know, now these days with knees and repair, you know, guys are doing it into their 50s. Good point. Good point.

This younger generation of backflippers are really, yeah. Those spring legs are probably really helpful for that, yeah. But, you know, in high school, like the one guy that could do a backflip was a fucking king. Yeah, he was. It was like every assembly, it's like, alright, we're about to start the assembly. Does backflip guy want to do one real fast out here on the floor?

Get everyone psyched up. Where's our backflipper? His name's Daniel or something. Daniel! He's out there flipping for his friends. Oh man, he's wearing a tank top again. Here he goes. Everyone in first period knows he was wearing a sweatshirt. You are a king if you can backflip.

You know, I always wish I was the backflip guy. Always. Yeah, he was popular for sure. Yeah. But getting into high school, I then, I then – I was like the first guy. I had the early birthday. So I turned 16 before most of my friends. So I got my driver's license first.

So I was that guy already like driving around, going to parties. What are you driving? I was driving an 88 Jetta GL. Okay. And it was – I loved that car. And now I look back and like that was a cool car. Like a lot of my friends got like a Nissan Pulsar. Like they got these you know sorry yeah the pulsar nx my friend had a toyota truck i thought that was cool but the jetta was a stylish car in the 80s had a good form it

was cut really well you know and then i actually graduated to diesel no this was a brother it was a manual lasted forever yeah man only friend that had a manual. My brother had a diesel and lasted forever. Yeah, manual. Only friend that had a manual, by the way, which was another chalk up for me. Anytime somebody got in my car, they're like, whoa, you're an adult? You know how to do adult stuff? But I remember, dude, the best memory was I had a friend's dad who had a manual that would drive us to school sometimes. And I remember the feeling of it. I just couldn't. I loved it.

I would sit in the back seat and go all the way up and come back and hit around corners and it was like a thunderbird he had more of a sedan type thunderbird but i when i got my car we got it like an hour out of seattle i went with my brothers and my dad my dad had a honda accord man or automatic we get the jetta my dad gets in i don't know i've never driven a stick i've never gotten into a story oh really you hadn't even known all right i've been in them and i knew i knew the feel of it i knew the timing i kind of knew all of it but he drives us 45 minutes and gets off the freeway and i'm driving my brothers now in his car and he pulls into a 7-eleven and the 7-eleven has a full hill drop into the parking lot right so we pull in he gets out throws me the keys and says all right see

it home gets in with my brothers and just takes off so now i'm sitting there like no idea about that's a hell of a good lesson and i asked like i went in and i was like hey when you drive a stick ship like the guy at 7-eleven i was like you dropped the clutch and then you know like i was trying to figure that out and i get in and i'm like so i back it around i get that you know but in the jet also it was a push down push up and then i got it to where i could get up the hill but i couldn't start it i couldn't get it going once i was on the hill so then i would basically get up to the top of the hill and watch and wait for the biggest window possible reverse down and just i gunned it out no stopping no stopping at the top of the hill

stopping at the top of the hill nothing and i remember pulling up my dad was like in the in the like the dining room window just like yep he made it like that's back when like you know like in like the medieval days they like let their son kill a wolf or something you know that that's basically the the i think equivalent to that so i you know and then i just started partying and it wasn't crazy but it was out of control. And it started to ruin my life immediately in the sense of like behavioral issues. I never respected authority. I never had good grades and it just got worse, you know, and I got caught drinking at school. Let me ask you, were you, was it that you, your grades are one thing, but were you just, was it not entertaining enough for you?

School, was it not challenging enough for you? School? Was it not challenging enough for you? That kid that was like, this is so easy. My mind is out the window and looking at like, what would it be like to be the lead singer of U2? I'm thinking that shit. And they're like, alright, so time to turn in your quiz. It's like, oh.

There it is. D's. I was getting D's. And I was maybe getting a C. And if I had a B, which it happened a couple times, it was like the biggest celebration. My parents, you know. But also it's like, hey, it's just a B. We're not going to give you too much here. We listen.

We hired a backflipper. Daddy! Come on out here. Get in the kitchen, Daddy! Flip for Nick. He got a B. Good. He's got a tank top on.

Come on in, bud. He means business. He means business. He means business. Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the number of plastic bottles and containers that you throw away? Ever thought about purchasing more eco-friendly products but didn't know where to start? Well, if you answered yes to either of those questions, meet Blueland. Blueland is on a mission to eliminate single-use plastics by reinventing home essentials that are good for you and the planet. Blue Land's innovative tablet refill solution takes up 10 times less space than a traditional bottle,

and their powerful formulas keep your home clean and smelling amazing. The idea is simple. You grab one of the beautiful Forever bottles. You fill it with warm water. You drop in the tablet. Boom, you get cleaning. of the beautiful forever bottles. You fill it with warm water, you drop in the tablet, boom, you get cleaning. Refills start at $2 and you don't have to buy a new plastic bottle every time you run out. You can even set up a subscription so you never run out of the products you use the

most. From cleaning sprays to hand soap to toilet cleaner and laundry tablets, all Blue Lamb products are made with ingredients you can feel good about. Try their Clean Essentials Kit, which has everything you need to get started. Products come in refreshing signature scents like Iris Agave, Fresh Lemon, and Eucalyptus Minton for a limited time. Their hand soap is getting a summer upgrade with three refreshing new scents, Strawberry Rhubarb, Citrus Patchouli, and Coconut Palm. Right now, you can get 15% off your first order when you go to blueland.com slash honeydew. That's 15% off your first order of any Blueland products at blueland.com slash honeydew. Blueland.com slash honeydew. You just need to take better care of

yourself is not a response to mental health struggles. You know, you live with it. So sometimes you need something more to achieve a real and lasting breakthrough. And maybe it's time you check out a guided ketamine therapy program from Mindbloom. Mindbloom is the leader in at-home ketamine therapy, offering a combination of science-backed medicine with clinician and guide support for people looking to improve their mental health and well-being. Mindbloom connects patients to licensed psychiatric clinicians to help them achieve better outcomes with lower costs, greater convenience, and an artfully crafted experience. To begin, take Mindbloom's online assessment to determine if Mindbloom is right for you. If approved, you'll schedule a video

consult with a licensed clinician where you'll discuss your goals and expectations for mental health treatment. Mindbloom will send you a kit in the mail complete with medicine, treatment materials, and tips for getting the most out of your experience. After only two sessions, 87% of Mindbloom clients reported improvements in depression and 85% reported improvements in anxiety. It's time to enter the next chapter in mental health and well-being. Let MindBloom guide you. Right now, MindBloom is offering my listeners $100 off your first six-session program when you sign up at mindbloom.com slash honeydew and you use the promo code honeydew at checkout. Go to mindbloom.com slash honeydew promo code honeydew. You're going to get $100 off your first six session program

today. That's mindbloom.com slash honeydew promo code honeydew. My good buddy Gary Adler's got a brand new comic book out. Gary's literally had his fingerprints all over the studio and everything. It's called Commando Place number two. All right. The first one was kick ass. It's called Speedrunner's Paradise paradise if you're a comic book fan i'm telling you this is the way to go it's a great read um he's got the third one coming out this fall so i wanted to give a little love and a shout out to gary adler and commando place go find it now let's get back to the do and uh so what is your what are you doing are you drinking are you smoking drinking and smoking pot and i remember i got had a fake idea i was the only guy that got it i drove fucking

how old at this point i was 16 damn so i'd driven downtown seattle into the u district and got this oregon state id it wasn't a driver's license you know just a laminated red card that and my name was glenn michaels is what i came up with because i love the skier named glenn plake And my name was Glenn Michaels is what I came up with because I love the skier named Glenn Plake. That's how we're going to ID for this episode. Glenn Michaels. A.K.A. Glenn Michaels. Actually, yesterday would have been my fake ID birthday. Is that real?

I would have been 47. 47? Yeah. All right, Glenn. I'm Glenn Michaels and we go to a party. Right. And now it's like around like I had gotten booze that night. I went to this.

I went to one place that was like the place that I knew didn't give a shit. So they give me booze. I take it to the party. Party's going. Booze is running out. There is there was a keg there that's running out. And some of the guys are like, hey, Nick has a fake ID. And so then this guy named chris gregory

who was the stud i mean he was the guy he was a year ahead of us but he looked like an nfl player and he was on our football team i mean he was like like cam chancellor the way that this guy would take people out he was just a headhunter you know and it, he was a stud and he had a Jeep, a Wrangler. And he goes, I'll take you down to get it. And I was like nervous, you know, so Chris Gregory's gonna take me down. I'm not going to turn that down. So I hop in the Jeep, we get down, we get in, he goes, I go in the store, I got a whole fucking laundry list of shit to get, you know? Yeah, paper and that. And I go in and I'm like getting all the stuff and I go up to the counter and I'm like, and I put it down.

And she goes, hey, I remember you from earlier, but let me get another look at that ID. And I was like, okay. And I show it to her and she goes, yeah, this isn't going to work. And she kept it. And I go, okay, well, I'll go put all this back. And I just grabbed it and ran out the door. Like there's no chance I'm getting into Chris Gregory's car without this booze. Or your ID. Or getting back to the party.

That's right. You got one of the other. And that goddamn beer is coming. I remember like a 12-pack. I got a 12-pack of Bud Light for some reason. I had like a Miller Natural Ice, like whatever. Like it was like four boxes. The Bud Lights just spill out throughout,

like, cause it's a gas station also, just spill out. And they're like fucking foaming, jump in the car, go, go, go. He starts fucking driving. Now he's a getaway driver. He pulls around the corner. And as we're driving down,

like one of the four, like the four main streets in Redmond, Washington, right? And it was like Redmond way. We're driving down. Coming the other direction, cop car. That fast. Just goes right by us.

Yeah, it was a small, you know, like it just happened that fast around there. And we just kept driving up to the party. Legend status immediately. Fuck yeah, dude. And once you get like up to that place, now rumors are being told about you. My brothers were hearing about me. They're five years younger. They're hearing about me at school now.

They're hearing about their older brother and like the stuff that he's done. And- Are you drinking nightly? Are you drinking at home? I was beginning to drink nightly. Like sneaking out, drinking my parents' stuff, having hidden stuff.

Their stuff too, yeah. Smoking pot. All my friends would like get caught and then blame me. I was like the fall guy for everything. Always took it. Always got grounded. Always persevered. Got through.

Got back out. Didn't let it hold me back. But I was a maniac. And my brothers were in basketball at their junior high, which was just around the corner, Redmond Junior High, I was at Redmond High School. And one of the guys in my brother's basketball team called my brother a faggot. And my brother was just crushed.

He was crying. He thought like everyone thought he was, like in that time that was like, so, this is 96. So that's like a pretty harsh thing to call somebody and then like a rumor to go around. So the next day I drove my jet up and I pulled into the bus lane right outside the gym, Redmond Junior High, let the car running. High school kid. Yeah. Walked into the gym, basketball practice is happening.

All the bleachers are up against the wall. You know, like they're like retracted up against the wall and i and i walk up and i jacob sees me my brother and he's just like oh god what and i go where is he which one which one and he points at the guy and i walked up and he was close and i grabbed him and lifted him up against the bleachers and i said if you call my brother a faggot one more time, I'm going to suck your fucking dick. And I walked out, got in my car and drove off. That guy, first of all, did not mess with my brother again. Second of all, my brother becomes a police officer and gets me, he's not anymore, but he was for a while and he quit.

But he got them to hire me to come play their holiday party, to do stand up at it. And right before I'm about to, he goes, hey, by the way, that guy that you, he's actually one of my coworkers now. And we're cool, we laugh about it. But just so you know, he's here now too. And real quick, before you go out,

Danny, get your ass in here, bro. Let's do those backflips warm them up for nick all right you should have a tank top off we'll see you danny's back flipping in the gym god right next to the guy at the bleachers just like what just happened about the police event i mean anywhere danny could pop out and it's gonna be a great scenario yeah that's fucking great and at that point i wasn't too far away from rehab and getting kicked out of school. I got suspended. I got in a fight in a church parking lot around the corner from our school, St. Jude's.

That's where all the kind of bad shit went down after school. Some guy, whatever the story is, it was just dumb. We just were circling each other in this parking lot, you know, and everyone's there. People from other schools had heard about it, that happening that day. They're there. He's a year older than me, but he's shorter than me. But he's pretty like kind of, I don't know how to explain him, but he's like a little gangster, you know. And he, we're circling.

And finally he goes, I thank God I'm not your dad. Because everybody knew I was like fucked up. Everybody knew that I was going through some shit. And like I was the bad boy. Like not like the bad boy, like tough boy, but like bad but like bad boy like oh yeah he doesn't care about any his life or anybody like he just is like going out and is that how you felt though i was so insecure and just wanted everyone to like me okay and i didn't see it's when you're that close to it it's hard to see what's actually happening and what your perception is. My brothers told me years later about, yeah, you were a legend.

At our school during that time, people wouldn't look at us the wrong way. They were going to get their dicks sucked if they did. They were. They were going to get their dicks sucked. And so, basically, he says, I'm glad i'm not your dad like or thank god i'm not your mom or something like because everyone knows that i'm kicked out of my house i was actually living you got kicked out somebody else's house right now oh wow wait hold on before all right go ahead then i want to go back to why you get kicked out i just got kicked out because of

my what i was up to like i just it was like the last straw you know you're out of the house and i went and lived with this dude this dude from my school whose dad owned a taekwondo studio and that was part of the rule is i had to be in school and be taking taekwondo i couldn't be suspended again i couldn't i could live with him so i'd taken about a month of taekwondo and really all that first month was about like just learning the right way to do this and to do like things like that against a against like a you know punching for a minute like getting your endurance up getting all your like all these things and i didn't realize i knew how to punch i like i didn't realize it's like one of those things like when danny larusso was like like in doing the fence he didn't realize that he was going to be blocking shit with it.

Like, oh my God. You know, I was going to apply to real life. And, but still, I wasn't like a fighter in my head, you know? And so he says that and I go at him and I miss, I miss. And finally he hockey punches me, man. He hockey knees me. He somehow gets my shirt over my head and knees me in the face. Like, I don't know if he meant to do it. I don't know if it was by accident.

I mean, I don't know. It was a baller move on his end. And what I didn't realize in the moment was that my braces, my lip got stuck in my braces and it chipped a tooth. And I was starting to bleed out of my mouth. I didn't know that. Now I'm just shirtless flailing in a parking lot. And I just was literally like, he's going like this. And I just threw one punch and I'm not a fighter. I'm not like, I'm not a badass. I'm not anything. I just threw one punch and it hit the spot,

knocked him out, like to the floor. Caused for a whole month, the white of his eye at school was red. No way. You know, one of those black eyes. Yeah. And I got him in the temple. There was just a stream of blood. And he's on the ground. Everyone's like, finish him, you know, whatever. Finish him, yeah. Yeah, and that's what I'm realizing.

I'm realizing right then, my lip. And I was like, hold on, timeout, timeout. You know, this guy's on the ground. Yeah, it's over. I'm saying timeout though. And then all of a sudden, boop, cops are coming in. Everyone takes off. The next day at school, I walk in, and the security guard at school sees me walking in.

He goes, what's up, timeout? I got back to him, dude. Yeah, he was involved with the police because we were students. Like, everybody at school, I mean, it was like timeout. So, it was like even though I did what I did, I still called timeout. And that somehow, that was like the story of my life. Like, I wasn't. You were a pussy still called timeout. And that somehow, that was the story of my life. You're a pussy for calling timeout. Yeah, whatever. And then three days later, my parents, I get arrested again.

Again? For trespassing. What was the first time? Not DUIs, but what is it called? DWIs. I's. You had an S on the end of that you got more than one no no no no not dw uh minor in consumption mic oh minor consumption minor possession underage

yeah minor consumption of alcohol minor possession of marijuana um trespassing i'd like drunkenly like drove on each these are each different times of being arrested yeah you drunk Lee drove on what were you about to say I dropped my but we were camping and I saw my buddy put his forerunner keys in his shoes this is by that bridge we would jump off McDonald River for McDonald bridge or something over in like Duval and I pulled his keys out and hopped in his car and started taking it for a ride around this field like just alone just like you know just tearing up somebody's yard and um that i got a dui and i got um you know whatever and that caused me to be kicked out of my friend's house my dad had to come pick me up at the police station how How was that? Well, the interesting part of it is that it was May 17th,

which is his birthday. Oh, no. And I've been not living at the house for a while. So he picks me up. I wake up. There's two Advil next to my bed. There's a water. My dad, he's like so like, he loves me so much and doesn't know what to do. But my mom is really the stickler of like, this is not allowed in our house. He cannot be here. He's tearing our family apart. Because that's what happens when there's one person in a family that is living like that. All of the attention goes to that person. And no one else is being paid attention to enough. And no one's like, they're all just so worried about this guy. And I remember my sister went to school with me. She was a year younger. And she walked up to me in the hallways. I would never even went to school with me. She was a year younger.

And she walked up to me in the hallways. I would never even talk to her. I mean, I walked by her like she was my neighbors that I hated or something. And she handed me a note. She's like, Andrew and Jacob wanted you, my twin brothers that are younger. I got it. I looked at the note and it's like,

please come home. Please, we love you. We miss you. Like heart-wrenching shit. I remember going in the bathroom and crying. So you were closer with them than you were with your sister? I wasn't really close to any of them. I was in my own world. They just really missed you.

And I was abusive at home. I was like mentally – I never hurt anybody at home, but I was a fucking – I was yelling was yelling screaming breaking stuff in the house punching holes and walls you know they were scared of me and my brothers weren't getting loved by me they were getting like like hey we want a piece of gum like and i had like bubble gum like bubble gum flavor cotton candy flavored i remember this cotton candy flavored bubble gum and i was like all right stick your head in the toilet then you can have it no and i literally watched my brother dip his head in the toilet and i'm like all right here's a piece just a dick yeah i mean now we love each other so much and we're so close and that all of this kind of brought that out but yeah so i woke up and my dad said hey your mom won't let you live

in the house anymore still um and you can't go back to your friend's house so i'm going down to oregon which was common for him for a week to do like a work conference in eugene and he said i'll drop you off at your grandma's house you can stay with her and then i'll pick you back up and we'll figure out what to do after that so we get down to my grandma's house we spend the night he says um before before i go down to Eugene, let's go fishing in the morning. Also common, go fishing all the time. So great, wake up at like four in the morning to go fly fishing with my dad,

I think on the Deschutes River or something is what I've told. Sounds amazing. Thing that we've done a lot. And so get in the car with a pillow, remember, like sleeping in the car on the way there and just waking up in a parking lot to some building in Gresham, Oregon. and because in oregon they have lockdown facilities in washington they didn't

okay so in oregon you were in and there was no no escaping it was like jail you know and the only people that could let you out was a doctor or your parents on there like whether we're giving up on him we don't care we get him out we're not paying anymore or he's healed we're giving up on him, we don't care, we get him out, we're not paying anymore, or he's healed, we're letting him come home, sort of a thing. And I look out and there's people like white suits on and white gloves and rubber gloves. You know, my dad's just kind of, he's crying in the driver's seat. And he just says, I'm sorry.

And he gets out of the car and I'm just sitting there and the door opens. They're like, are you gonna make this easy? Or, you know, and I just got out and they took me in. I was naked within like i think three minutes bending over and they were um licking my asshole like dad surprise no they were you know like looking for a knife like i've had a knife jammed up my ass that i was trying to you you know, get in there or something.

And drugs and whatever. This is what, like 5 a.m. now at this point? Yeah, 6 a.m. What a way to start the day. From Portland to Gresham, whatever that drive is. And immediately got put into this room. And then immediately had to go into like a class. You know, like I'm just like, this is a whirlwind thing, right? Walk me through this.

You go into this class. How many people are in there? 15 or 20. Male, female? A mix. Age ranges or what? All under 18. Okay, this is an under.

Yeah, most of them are around my age. And most of them were in there for. Are there any Gs in in there like nine years old and shit no no that's a different facility for them that's just daycare i think i remember walking into the the um first little thing and everyone's at desks like those school desks you know that are like that have like the thing and the chairs attached. And then I'm sitting there and one of the girls says like, that I'm cute. Turns out she's got a treatment relationship going on with some other guy in there. And so the second they break to go into small groups, that guy gets up and starts charging

at me from across the room. And I see it coming and I'm just like, uh, and I just grab the desk and chair and throw it. You know, it doesn't hit them. It doesn't do anything. It just causes a huge disturbance and makes me look like I'm a psycho. So I get immediately put into the padded QR room, quiet room that they call that where you're just strapped down. You're strapped. At the beginning of it, they came in, unstrap me. And, uh, you know, like after they thought i'd calm down even though i was like not ever not calm i was like nobody saw what happened you know and they've got a camera in there and the lady at the front desk is watching you and you know they let you out after a certain amount of time and how long have you spent in there i don't know it wasn't it was probably like a half hour it wasn't it wasn't like crazy but it

it was this was two hours into waking up in a parking lot. I mean, assholes been spread open. People are charging you. You're in a padded quiet. I mean, what the fucking 120 minutes, dude. God damn. One thing that happened that was amazing is I was wearing my fishing pants, which my fishing pants had regular pockets here. But then also inside that pocket, there was a zipper with a deeper pocket inside. So, you had two front pockets on either side. And in one of my front pockets, the inside

one, I had a tin of Copenhagen. And I loved, I was a chewer and smoker and everything, you know. And they didn't see that, they didn't check that inside pocket. And those are the pants, the only pair of pants they gave me in my only t-shirt was another thing. And I then had chew and I was using, I was bartering chew. Like a guy gave me his contact case. I filled up his contact case with chew, brought it to the next thing and he gave me Adderall. I'd never even done Adderall. I'd never done any drugs besides weed. But now I'm in rehab where I'm learning about, they're teaching me like, hey, drugs are actually

pretty cool. You know, like the way you're hearing about them you're like oh wow i want to try that drug you know and i remember i had like a a fire like thing in my room and i'd taken uh a piece of paper wrapped the the um adderall in it and put it in there and then i put deodorant on my hand to reach in and stick it and pull it out and i was like trying these adderall and and and i started realizing like to get out you gotta you gotta change you know there's no other way to get out of this place or i gotta turn 18. and um so i started faking it like immediately and then i bought into it and then i realized oh yeah i've got a problem the way that i was acting is not normal it's being in here what when was that moment what hit you i think that

happened like two weeks in and okay so let me stop you there for one moment the two weeks that you're spending in there at first are you pissed at your parents like what are your emotions about being in there scared angry angry what are you so angry what are people at school i can't talk to anybody no i don't have any like my parents came down for like a weekend. So in person is the only way. Like therapy session. Yeah. I wouldn't talk to them. They would be like, hey, your mom called, your grandma called.

I'd be like, yeah, tell them to take a fucking hike. And I felt like protected in a way, you know, like, hey, I'm in here. Also, what a story this is now. Like people are going to be like, wow, Nick did this. You know, like in my old mind thinking, I'm thinking like, oh, this is going to perpetuate this kind of thing, which it's not even a thing anymore. It's actually what I am. I'm actually this kind of bad kid. It's not like a cool allure anymore because we're all about to graduate and I'm just going to be a piece of shit and it's not going to be cool anymore, you know? But the thing that hit me that I've told so many people that have

children that drink, that have, you so many people that have children that drink, that have, you know, people that in their lives that have a problem or if they have a problem, I realized that being in there wasn't normal. It wasn't an accident. It wasn't a string of accidents that led to me getting stuck in a rehab. My friend Tom would never have been in there. My friend Raman never would have been in there. All my friends would never accidentally make it this far into rehab. If it looks like a problem and it smells like a problem, it's a problem. And just that this is not normal. Like I say to people going to an AA meeting, that's not normal. Okay. Going just assume, just like, let me try it out. That's not normal. People that don't have a problem. Don't think,

let me try out an AA meeting. They don't, people that don't have a problem. Don't go to bed. Like, oh, I'm not going to do that again. They don't, they just don't. There's people that are normal. And then there's people that aren't. And I was not normal. None of that was normal. I got a whole fucking show full of these people. Yeah, man. I know. It's like, you know.

And then when I got out, I changed. Because I don't understand that. Like, I've had a lot of addicts sit across from me and tell me things like, they're blown away when I tell them I could finish half a beer, just to have a beer and leave. And they're like, I can't. I can't. Yeah.

Not only that, like, if I have one, I'll have 20. And they're like, I'm not exaggerating. It just won't even, I can't stop. And I'm like, I understand what you're saying. So, was it like that for you, too? Were you? Yeah, I mean, but you just said, like, drinking a beer. I wouldn't be holding a beer.

At that age, yes, beer. This is so, you know, what happened though is I then went to 12 years of pretty much being sober. Okay. So you got out at what point? I got out. Two weeks? No, I got out at like six weeks. Six weeks.

Okay. Because at two weeks in, you're like, fuck, this is not normal and I am going to commit to this. And then I loved it. I was like learning, you know, but there's like, we weren't even getting let outside. We were in a lockdown facility you know then they transferred me to another facility that had outdoors and stuff and then i got sent home did you have any um what did that girl call relationship no yeah no yeah i was heartbroken too the reason i got into that fight with that guy was over a girl that had dumped me and broken my heart and then apparently he was seen like with her at a party in a way that i didn't like the sound of and uh so you know i i remember i had her also in one of my pockets that they didn't take

out was her picture i had a picture her school picture like that's all you had of people you know and i remember having it on my dresser and then one day it fell behind my dresser. You can't move dressers in rehab. They're bolted down. Yeah, picture's gone. Because it's possible suicide. It's still there. no and then finally I was just like I needed that picture to go back there I needed to stop looking at that you know and like causing this like allure of heartbreak it's not what that's not what's happening that was a bullshit relationship you're a kid this is what's happening you know and I remember getting out and I had this moment where I like walked out because my parents have been

sending me to church a lot you know my whole life because I was bad. And they were like, you know, they started going to church just to make it so I would go. Is that right? Yeah. Wow. Yeah. And I was going into the youth group and I loved youth group because I was also, my reputation, you know, like preceded me. Like they all knew about me and I was cool. I was like the bad kid, you know? And then I got sober and I remember walking out and none of my friends knew where I was that whole time. Nobody knew.

My parents didn't tell anybody where I had been. I was just disappeared. And I walk out and this guy Kurt pulls up, who was the sound guy at the high school church group. He had a Jetta GLI. Those are nice. Those are nice. Yeah. Red.

It was beautiful. Had turbo in it, had everything. He pulls up. Yeah, Red. It was beautiful. Had turbo in it. Had everything. He pulls up. Yeah, he had three star rims. He eventually gave me that car when I moved to LA. I drove down. Oh, really? I drove down to LA in that car.

Yeah. Or I drove down in a U-Haul towing that car. It was lowered, you know, everything. And this guy pulls up and I see my buddies like walking down the street. And I had a decision. It was like that Robert Frost bullshit right there. Hold on. From literally walking out of this fucking facility, here they come?

I get driven home. Okay. I remember we were close to home and my dad. Wait, who picked you up? My parents did. Parents. Okay. So mom came for this.

Dad dropped you off, but mom's there for the pickup. No. I was in somebody else's car, but the car overheated when we were about in tacoma like an hour from home and we i remember having to walk off the freeway with this guy and with gallons of water come back and like do it and then we like got home and i remember getting home and it was that quick like i walked out my parents had called kurt to tell him i was home because they wanted me to be with him. And the neighborhood, all the kids are hanging out in my neighborhood all the time. Like everyone's out skateboarding and stuff.

And I see them and see Kurt. And I was just like, hey guys, yeah, crazy. I'll call you when I get back. And I just got in the car with Kurt and Kurt would do this thing where just drive you around the lake and just talk, you know, like listen. He'd be like, have you ever heard this song? You can play a song. And we want to get a slice of pizza. It was just like a guy that was trying to keep me out of trouble. And what a great job he did. I mean, that's nice. You got someone occupying your time. Yeah, and then I went to a church camp.

In a positive way, yeah, okay. A church camp pretty soon after that where I found Jesus and saw it and felt it and like wanted to believe it. And also saw this kind of thing where it's like, oh, I'm repairing in a lot of ways. And part of the program of AA is finding a higher power. And like, so this is helping me out there. Also being around these people isn't bad. You know, the thing about churches is minus the people that suck, it's a brilliant idea.

Right? Let's just break down the actual basis of a church is it's a place where anyone in the community is welcome. Right? That's the reality of it. It's supposed to be, yes. community is welcome, right? That's the reality of it. Supposed to be, yes. Yes. Well, that's it. Without the people.

The idea of Christianity is all are welcome, yes. Without the people that have changed that, the people that God wouldn't even like, the people that don't represent him at all, without those people, what a brilliant place to go and feel welcome and helped the way that Kurt helped me. Like that's what's good about it, you know? And I saw all that and I loved it and I wanted to get involved and I liked helping people now. And I like speaking. I remember I went back to that rehab center like a year sober and spoke to the kids that were there.

That's nice. And I was like speaking at high schools and I ended up graduating and got really involved in church and just like was a leader, like I ended up in the worship band, you know. I also like nobody looked at me like this guy's spiritual, like can answer my questions. But I was kind of the showcase.

Like, oh, you want to see somebody whose life's turned around? Nick, get up here. Tell them your story. Hold on real quick. Danny, get your tank top on, son. Flip out here. Fire it up from Nick. Wait about 10 minutes. Let him get to the part where he was wet in the bed, and then I want you to on son flip out here fire it up from Nick bro wait about 10 minutes

let him get to the part where he was wet in the bed and then I want you to throw a flip out we'll break for cupcakes we're gonna break for cupcakes and backflips this episode of the honeydew is brought to you by

Zippix toothpicks Zippix brings you a totally satisfying convenient and flavorful way to curb cravings and relax with 2mg and 3mg options. Remember when massive vape clouds, ashtrays, and dip spit were awesome? Now there's an easier, less messy, and more subtle way to curb cravings with Zippix Toothpicks. The best part about Zippix is that you really can use them just about anywhere. ZipX Toothpicks are long-lasting and available in six delicious flavor choices. Plus,

you can stop exposing your lungs to smoke and vape fog. It's the oral gratification and amazing flavors that keep us coming back to ZipX. They only sell their toothpicks online, making it one of the most cost-effective alternatives available. Also, if you need a boost of energy, you can try their Zip Energy B12 and Caffeine Toothpicks. Go to ZippixToothpicks.com today and use code HONEYDOO to save 10% off your order. That's ZippixToothpicks.com, promo code HONEYDOO. You must be 21 or older to order.

Zip more, smoke less with Zippix Toothpicks. If you are like me and there's a foreign language that you regret not learning in school, it's never too late to start with Babbel. I started doing Spanish in like eighth grade and went all the way to 11th, got a D in it, y'all. So Babbel is the language learning app that sold more than 10 million subscriptions. Thanks to Babbel's fun and easy bite-sized language lessons, you can finally cross learning that new language off your list.

I'm taking Spanish like I've told you, and I really do love it. I'm just sitting and driving in the car listening. Boom, lesson. Sit at home, sitting around. Boom, lesson. It's easy. It's quick. With Babbel, you only need 10 minutes to complete a lesson, so you can start having real-life

conversations in a new language in as little as three weeks. Other language learning apps use AI for their lesson plans, but Babbel lessons were created by over 150 language experts. Their teaching method has been scientifically proven to be effective, and with Babbel, you can choose from 14 different languages, including Spanish, French, Italian, and German. Plus, Babbel's speech recognition technology helps you to improve your pronunciation and accent. There are so many ways to learn with Babbel's speech recognition technology helps you to improve your pronunciation and accent. There are so many ways to learn with Babbel. In addition to lessons, you can access podcasts, games, video stories, and even live classes.

Plus, it comes with a 20-day money-back guarantee. So start your new language learning journey today with Babbel. Right now, you can get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to babbel.com slash honeydew. That's babbel.com slash honeydew for up to 55% off your subscription. Babbel, language for life. Now, let's get back to the dude. Oh, man. Okay.

Yeah, I loved it. And then I stuck with it. I stayed sober, and then I decided to move to LA because I – What age are you coming here? 24. Okay. So from – you said 16, 17 you're getting out of that rehab. So eight years you're clean and sober. Six years.

Six years, okay. And you're coming – No, yeah, about eight years. And you're coming to Los Angeles. And I come to Los Angeles. And it was about a year until I started smoking weed and taking pills. But I didn't drink for 12 years. Okay.

12 from being – From when I got sober. Okay. And, you know, I started stand-up. What pills are you taking? Whatever the waitress says at the Laugh Factory would give me. Okay. You know.

And, you know, but it started going from like, you from like you know like hey you want one of these like to hey can i stop by your house and get it and get 30 of those tomorrow at noon you know like immediately i didn't realize i had an opiate addiction oh okay and i was still involved in church a bit when i moved la and i went to to Africa on this, to Kenya for like this, it was like a mission trip, but we were like, you know, it's like, it was like this really cool thing in this area called Kibera, which is like the size of Central Park, but a million people live in it with no water, no power. Damn, a million people. Wow. It's, it's something I'd never could ever imagine in my life. Dude, I remember we were driving in there and we were like go over this like man-made bridge and standing in the middle of the bridge is a tv crew

and there's a white guy on camera and as we drive by it's fucking dean kane nah doing like yeah doing some video and i just remember being like what kaibera in kenya what is going on anyways three days into kenya i thought that I was sick. I thought I had malaria or something, but what I was doing was coming off opiates. It was bad. It was. Taken to the Kenyan hospital. Thrown up and shaken and everything.

Fainted in the shower. Damn. Yeah, taken to the hospital. How many pills at your worst, how many pills a day were you taking? You know, it was like on you would go on milligrams of like how how strong the pills were and then you're also cutting in how much of that is acetaminophen or you know whatever that's called is that what's called yeah acetaminophen is the way to say acetaminophen acetacitaphen what you're like you know you're doing math like okay so how much

actual tylenol am i taking and how much drugs am i taking and you know you're you're constantly like doing math but i was popping like i don't know there's people that do like 40 a day yeah i've heard some points that are just outrageous i'd say i was like at 15 probably off and on but like vicodins weren't doing it for me anymore percocets if i could get them lower tabs what i forget feel like one of them was called that anyway. So I went through detox in Kenya without knowing it. And got home and then just, I don't know, I didn't get back into pills. I don't know what it was. I was like, just got more into marijuana.

And then the first time I drank again, I mean, it's in a movie, man. It's like, just you want to know, you want to see somebody who's got a problem? This is what happens. So now I've made it in stand-up enough to where I've done The Tonight Show. I had a Comedy Central half hour. I was touring regularly, and I was on the up and up, getting pilots, all this stuff. I'm thinking, I can handle booze. What am I doing?

I should have booze now. I just got married and i plan out that i have a gig in vegas and i plan out you're gonna drink i'm gonna drink at this gig i'm gonna try it out how many years 12 years of not drinking okay 12 full years yeah okay so i get there and first thing i do is check in. It was to the Palms. Remember those shows they used to have at the Palms? I do remember the Palms, yeah. And I go down to the pool and I order a drink. And I don't order a beer.

I order a, like, what's the equivalent of like a Long Island iced tea, but it's got like absinthe and all this stuff. You know, it's like some fancy drink. Because I remember like Mitch Hedberg had a joke about absinthe. And I, you know, like I wanted to try it because of that joke. And I, you know, allinthe. And I wanted to try it because of that joke and all these things. And I feel great, go up to my room, pass out on the bed, just like laying on the bed watching TV, and wake up to just pounding on the fucking door. And I'm looking around.

I'm so confused. And I open the door. It's security. They're like, you're supposed to be on stage 10 minutes ago. Wow, really? The opener had gone. They'd been trying to call me, even trying to get into my room.

That's how quickly booze affected my career and my life was just that. That should have been the, okay. But that's the problem is you've done it now and it's, you know, there's no peeling it back. It's like, if you're off sugar and then you have a gummy bear, it's like, you're going to finish that bag.

You know, you're going gonna finish the bag man i mean and then you know what you're gonna start eating bags every day that's what's gonna happen and then you're gonna have to get off it again and that's gonna suck and but that took me 10 years of just okay you know of what uh 10 years of a gradual immediately knowing i'm an alcoholic immediately being able to look at myself in the mirror saying you're lying to yourself and to everybody, but continuing to do it. And slowly it overtaking every part of my life, you know, like missing flights, you know, like small things, you know, but it's like business. Like you don't do that. You know, you're not. like business like you don't do that you know you're not yeah you know you can think you're an artist but you know artists probably do their job and part of your job is getting on that plane

you know except for the select few that you know were wild and you can see that that's fine but that wasn't working for me it doesn't work for most people and so i eventually get to you know there's a lot that happens in here. I mean, I'm talking like walked off a second store balcony on an Airbnb in Minneapolis, landed in the grass, should have died, should have broken my neck. What do you mean you walked off it? Dude, we get into this Airbnb on this tour that I'm doing. We have a day off. And so I rented this Airbnb. It's like on a lake, but you can't even swim in this lake. It was like, you know, We have a day off.

And so I rented this Airbnb. It's like on a lake, but you can't even swim in this lake. It was like, you know, right out of Minneapolis. Just a view. Yeah. Yeah. And it was summer and I took the master bedroom. And in the master bedroom, there was a door. Open it and it just goes out to nothing.

There used to be something there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then there's signs like, don't open door, right? But my problem was, is that I didn't just like drink and pass out. I drank and then my life started, you know, like I black out and then I'm starting to I'm like walking around and doing shit. And I was already to the point to where like you make mistakes like you've done this before. What about what happened in Anchorage?

Like you can't let that happen again. I'll tell that too. But anyway, I've yeah, I just like in the middle of the night, I just walked out, walked out the thing. Fuck, you could have, you definitely died from that. Yeah. Did you break any bones or anything? Or you're so shit phased you fell out relaxed and you were good to go?

No, it didn't hurt. God damn, you're lucky. But you know what happened? There's this story of Townes Van Zandt that he tells in this like, this recorded message with his manager that they have on one of his albums. And it's basically like saying how he fell off a balcony just because he wanted to know what it felt like to fall. You know, he wanted that feeling. And I think in my drunken state, I took that on.

And I wanted to do what Townes Van Zandt did or something stupid. He broke his neck when he did it. He did. Yeah. So anyway, but no, no in Alaska I was there with Rory and um Jen Kirkman and we uh we just got one I did I did everyone else is probably fine and I get back to the room and I wake up and so this hotel was really nice in Anchorage all tourists you know and most people that travel to Anchorage are older. We were on like the 16th floor.

It's a VIP floor. You can't get to the floor without a key. You can't get into the door past the elevator without another key. And they had the exit stairwells, but the exit stairwell was outside. So, like, you'd walk out of the hallway and you're outside. You walk down, walk into another hallway, walk out again. And it was like that the whole way down. Okay.

Spiraling down. And the door though. So I wake up pissing off this balcony at like 6 a.m. Wake up. You mean you come to and you're. I'm standing on this outdoor balcony. This is what you're seeing yourself do. On the 16th floor.

Oh my God. I don't have my room key i only am wearing underwear and i was wearing the underwear that i was wearing at the time was these american apparel briefs because you could go down that little thing up front you know or you used to pee out of but you could put your hand in there and it would go all the way under your butt there was all this storage area under there okay and that's where i traveled with weed okay i would double i would put weed in turkey baster bags seal them up double side tape them under your sack put it under my side yeah okay so i was wearing these briefs under orange briefs exactly what i was

wearing that day and i go to open the door doors locked i don't have anything so i start walking down walking down 16 floors and there's the last door and i just i don't know what this door is opening into it's on the main floor what the door opened into was an all-you-can-eat buffet and it's just all of these old tourists and i just walk out and it's like hey and i go to the front counter and i'm like hey i'm like locked out of my room how many people are in there dude i don't know and they go do you have id do you have id it's like do i look like i have id no no no one like me is no one that's looked like this has ever had an idea on them okay they're either at a strip club

or they're you know oh hell yeah so they had to they had to escort me up to my room so i could walk in and prove you were you yeah but so like that meant sitting in an elevator for 16 floors in my underwear with a fucking staff which probably for them is like, hey, at least it's not one of the elderly guys. Yeah, they fucking love it. Oh, you can eat buffet, dude. I mean, it was brutal. That's brutal. It was brutal.

So what put you – These are the types of things that are happening to me on a regular basis. So when do you finally go the second time? What put you in there? Well, at this point, I'm drinking drinking over like i'm basically drinking a handle of vodka a day i can't really were you wow yeah i was buying them in fifths but i would always have two a day and i would like have one at home have one in my car have one in this like hidden drawer above the cabinet in the bathroom everywhere i'd show up apart like a sunday afternoon people are out drinking in the backyard normal people that are enjoying a beer on a sunday and i'm enjoying a beer too is what they think except

i'm sneaking to my bathroom i'm sneaking out to my car i'm sneaking to wherever i've got hidden vodka and taking huge drain like five shot just drinks out of it out of like warm fucking room temperature vodka and then walking back out my beer just like hey i'm just like you guys you know and it was it was just getting horrible and then i get to bloomington indiana and i remember the movie um breaking away is that bicycle movie no it was a bicycle movie that was like 79 or 80. Daniel Stern's in it. Dennis Quaid's in it.

Yes, Dennis Quaid. That's what just made it stick. Yep. And it's shot in Bloomington. And it's the whole movie's about the Cutters, which is like the group of like locals against the university kids because there's a big university there. And there was a swimming hole scene where they like hike to the swimming hole that's in like lime rock. And it's like this green, beautiful thing. It doesn't look worldly, you know.

And I was in Bloomington was like, I want to find that. And so then one of the guys at the comedy club was like, oh, my buddy knows where it is. He's heard about it. So the next day, this guy takes me on a two hour hike through the woods on a private property where we're seeing like live ammunition. Do not enter. like all these signs found it jumped off of it just like in the movie swam in it it was fucking glorious you know leave go from there to montreal to where the festival you know didn't go home. And I'm in Montreal and like, I'm doing like a week and a half of shows there,

I think my own hour. And somebody sees a tick. It's right on my scalp. It's right on my hairline, right in front. There's a tick that's been in there since Bloomington. It's been about five or six days now. And they get tweezers, they pull it out. It's intact. You know, like they put it in like a little pill thing that I had and they were like, take this to the doctor when you

get home. And you know, you're going to be home in three days or two days. Like you should be fine. Right. I get home and I'm not making good decisions. Also, I'm not going to the doctor because I smell like booze all day, every day. And they're going to check me out and I'm probably dying. And I was, I really was dying, and I didn't really know how bad. But waking up with liver pains, waking up with chest pains. Really? You would have physical pain. And drinking.

And any day that I tried not to drink, it was vomiting and shaking, and then I had to drink through vomit, like drinking, trying to get booze into me so my body would even out. And I was convinced that if I didn't drink, my heart would stop, and that was what was going to happen. So I'd wake up at two in the morning with chest pains, go find vodka, wake up at four in the morning, same thing, wake up at four, stay up till six drinking vodka, then go to bed. Then my son's got to wake up for school. Like, it's like, you know, I was just like not in the world. I was living in my own world in this house and it was tearing everything down.

And, um, you know, but I get this tick. I go back. Finally, like I'm with my riding partner maybe a week or two after Montreal. And I go like I have this like lesion on my arm. And I go to him. I was like, isn't this crazy? Look at this bruise. Must have been from wrestling with my son, you know, because he like grabbed my arm or something.

And he was like, huh. And then like 10 minutes later, I'm like, oh, my God, did I tell you about Bloomington? I got with a tick. You know, I'm telling him the story. I'm also drunk right now. You know, I'm always drunk. I drink all day. And I don't know this. He's Googling ticks, Lyme disease. And what's the promo poster photo of what it looks like is a bullseye lesion. Is that right? Yeah. And he's like, you need to go to – we stopped riding right then. That's all I ever heard as a kid. As I'm saying to you before outside, like I don't know what Lyme disease is, what it does to your body. But everything was as soon as you get in from the woods, everybody checked for ticks because you can get Lyme disease.

We were like, that doesn't sound good. We don't want that. So let's check for ticks. I mean, it's one of those – I've seen them on dogs that they get oh my god looks like a bubble like oh it's just sucking on that fucking dog for like weeks and shit like jesus christ it's so scary and also there's a good section of people that don't think it's real you know really and there's also would you not think so you know because it's like it's hard to detect what's actually happening to you you know like what it's actually doing to your body.

And some people have chronic Lyme's or they have all these things, you know. You find it early enough, like I did. I got on these antibiotics and I got rid of it. But I didn't get rid of it until I got sober. I was on the antibiotics for, I think, like four months, to be honest, or something. They're hardcore. And when you're drinking, they just cancel out antibiotics altogether. So, what does Lyme have? Is that right?

I was waking up feeling fine, right? Go out to my car, besides like the hangover and all the other shit going on in my life. Sit down and all of a sudden I can't sit. My tailbone hurts so bad. Like I can't sit. I never felt that in my life. Go in, have to get in bed, wake up, tailbone feels fine. Now I can't move my arm. Like it's just going between joints, you know? And like the feeling of exhaustion. I mean, I was just sleeping so much and drinking when I wasn't sleeping, you know,

like hidden in the closet and the guest room where I was now living at my house with like Lyme's disease, like where the AC was blowing. And I'm just like, you know, my friend dies of alcohol. Really? Yeah. This amazing singer, songwriter, producer that lived in Oregon. He, um, we talked a week before he died and we both realized we were drinking the same amount. He like FaceTime, I remember he FaceTime called me which nobody had ever doing that and like like so weird why would richard do that and we're talking

and you know it's like i gotta stop i gotta get help like me too man you know like whatever and then a week later he goes he gets taken to the hospital day later taken to hospice three days later dead that quick organ failure g gondus, like whatever. He turned yellow. It happened to a kid I went to high school with. His older brother, I saw a post and I reached out and just said, hey, man, I'm so sorry. What the fuck happened? Because his brother who passed was my grade.

And he said the same thing. He said he never stopped drinking like we were in high school and college. And he just kept drinking and smoking. And he said one day he woke up, his eyes were yellow. Went right to the doctor and they're like we're it's too late for you and within like i don't know a few weeks he was gone it's yeah so is that your wake-up call no no eventually was but that took me down i went up i went up and did a memorial show in portland for him with a whole bunch of other musicians that he'd worked with. I mean, the Shins.

And I hosted the whole thing at this cool theater. I forget which one it was at in Portland. Afterwards, everyone is going out to a bar. And I remember this was my rough trip in Portland where I ended up having to stay an extra couple of days because I was so sick. But I remember getting to the bar and they let everyone in. And I barely remember this, but I've been told about it from a lot of people. That I came up to the door and the guy just said, no. Really?

And I was like, what? Why? And he's like, something's not right about you. You can't come in. Like everyone's inside. I'm like, you guys. And they're like, no, let him in. He's fine.

He's fine. And the guy's like, I'm sorry. I can't let somebody like that in here. Like whatever state I was in, you know, we're coming straight from the memorial service. It was like, oh God, it was a bad night. And I continued to go and go and go. And then finally, I mean, I, I go to the doctor and the Lyme stuff is being figured out and they got my blood tests back. And this is a doctor in Malibu. Like my appointment was like at 10 in the morning. And, um, I've been drinking on the

way there, you know, and, and I get in there and I sit down and he's like looking at my papers and he's like, so you didn't tell me you were a drinker. And I was like, well, what do you mean? He goes, well, your enzymes, he goes, uh, you've got 360 enzymes in your liver. And again, I don't know. My numbers might be, I was drunk. I don't remember all of it. What's that mean? I don't know. But I said, what does that mean?

And he says, you're supposed to have six. Wait, did you say six? Yeah. You have 360? Yeah. Holy shit. Yeah. It was like, he's like, you need to stop drinking.

He's like, I can help you. I can give you medications to stop drinking. And he like writes out this big list of things that he's going to start giving me to help me stop drinking. But I leave there and grab a bottle of vodka, drive up the pass in, you know, Malibu, like over by Pepperdine University. And I'm driving. And they have these like little, as you're going through the canyons there, like a pull-off. You can like pull off for a view site or something. And it always says no parking. I pulled off on one of those and got out of my truck with vodka in my hand. And I was drinking like a quarter of it just while I'm driving. That's how sick I was. I was

driving drunk. I'm ashamed of the risk that I put other people through my problem. And I just started kind of walking down the canyon off the side of the road there, thinking I'm not coming back. Really? And I got, and I had like a whole bunch of pills and Xanax and all this stuff. And halfway down, something hits me like, oh, if you decide decide not to die you might get a parking ticket in my mind like that was like okay yeah you can't do this then right you're not ready so i went up got in my car drove through the canyon so drunk it was like i mean that's that's that's so dangerous it is beyond dangerous i pull I call my- Even if you know there's no traffic on that road the whole way, to do that yourself, those canyon roads are wildly fucking dangerous and curvy.

Yeah. It's, yeah. I call my best friend, riding partner, and I call my manager, and I just say, my hands are up, man. Somebody needs to come pick me up and save my life. Take me somewhere. And my buddy, Kevin, like drives out, picks me up. My manager got me into a rehab. You know, managers can do stuff like that.

Like got me to rehab that day. Like they weren't taking people anymore. And it was this really cool, like Malibu rehab, you know, and I came in and they took a breathalyzer. 0.38. Jesus Christ. From right from the spot to there? Yeah.

I finished that whole bottle of vodka. 0.38. How are you even upright? I was talking. How? They were blown away at my casual demeanor and conversation. And you were holding conversation? Yes.

I was that sick, man. I was drinking so much booze. But also the pills, too. Look, I'm fortunate. I'm allergic to opiates. They make me throw up. They make me break out, itch, hives, the whole nine. It sucks because I also can't take them for pain.

But that alone i mean i i know how i feel on those fucking things and then to put a bottle of vodka on top of it you're having conversations yeah 0.08 maybe it was 0.32 either way 0.08 is a legal limit and i was well above it over two above it and um yeah they they checked me in. I woke up and it just, you know, the next two days were an absolute blur of delusions. I was seeing things. They were trying to keep me alive because, you know, in rehab, really what they're trying to do is help you detox comfortably and then help you get better, give you classes, teach you about your addiction, teach you about emotional things that you're doing, you know, all this stuff. Two days in, I'm full on having conversations

out at a back table with nobody around me. And the rehab's monitoring me. They're all watching it. Everyone there is like, this is a unique case, this guy, you know, and they're all just kind of like letting me and I got convinced that they were after me, like that they were going to check me into a mental institute because they thought I was mentally breaking down. Did you realize you were having conversations out back by yourself or was that thing you saw on video later? Or they told you? They never showed me. They tell you.

Yeah. I was entertained. They found me naked out in the backyard finally at like 4 a.m. or 2 a.m. And I was dying. They rushed me to the hospital, Los Robles Hospital or something. And I don't know. I woke up a week later. A week?

They rushed me in the hospital. And I kind of remember this moment where I'm in a movie and I'm getting wheeled down a hallway and I'm seeing the ceiling. And some guy – and I'm like trying to move my arms and some guy goes nick we're trying to save your life you're strapped down because you've been combative you hear you hear this that's all i remember hearing and whatever they couldn't get an iv into me right they were trying so hard that combative and also like just dehydrated and all the things that I was. And I remember the nurse from the rehab saying, I've never seen someone be stabbed like they were stabbing you to get that into your arm, to get you to like knock out because you were being so like kicking and punching. You were buck naked, you know, just like in this hospital. And I remember waking up and it's like, it's funny.

Like I called Al Madrigal somehow. I don't remember. I don't know how, where I got his number. I don't know. But I'd love to actually talk to Al about that now and be like, what was that conversation like? Cause I can't remember anything. But I remember it was like, I was canceling a show or something. I don't know. Anyway, I'm in the hospital. They get me out and I was just done, man. I wanted to live. I just realized like I can't do this anymore. I wasn't one of the people there that's like, I don't want to be in rehab. I was like, I want to be better. My life is done. It was just finished. I now have a second shot. I've torn everything down. I'm living in a house that I can't afford anymore. I'm not able to work.

I'm doing all of these things. Yeah, I mean, our job, well, hell, any job without your health, you're not working. No. Yeah, so I stayed. Especially something like this. Uh-uh. I mean, it was, yeah, 60 days I stayed in there. 60?

In the middle of it, it burnt down. Malibu fires. It was crazy. I woke up at 8 in the morning, and it was like, that's weird. Usually somebody comes by and knocks on the window and wakes me up. And I go out, and I'm in the kitchen. They have this fancy kitchen where they're serving me. It was a nice rehab.

And I'm making my lemon juice that I was making every morning. And people are scrambling. And there was smoke the night before. And I'm like, hey, so that I was making every morning. And people are like scrambling. And there was smoke the night before, you know. And I'm like, hey, so what's the deal with the fire? And they go, we have to be out of here in a half hour. Like they were evacuating the place and somebody just forgot to wake me up. Nah. Because I was in the furthest room away from everything.

And so I run and scramble, get all my shit. I was in the last car out of there with the nurse and a dog that they just found, a dog. And it burnt down an hour later damn and we ended up at some like airbnb in oxnard where we were like stayed there for a few days and found another rehab center to take over and move into it was wild and what happens when you get out i go home and that was how many years ago now four in October good for you you've been sober the whole time yeah oh yeah

and my life was just torn down you know I get home divorce move out move in with friends living in a friend's like downstairs basement then the pandemic hits oh I'm living in a studio you downstairs basement. Then the pandemic hits.

I'm living in a studio. I basically went down to the ground and I'm now getting out. Good for you, dude. And everything is, it's better. It's good. I'm not like this guy that's like, I'm fixed and I'm done.

I know I'm not. And I go looking for help all the time because that's like, I'm fixed and I'm done. Like, I know I'm not. And I go looking for help all the time because that's the only, you know, I've learned that, you know, your seek, your only, what is the, your only is something is your secrets. You're only as sick as your secrets. I've never heard that before.

You're only as sick as your secrets. And no matter how heavy the phone is, it's actually just a button. You know, like anytime you need to just talk to somebody, it's so simple. And it's so hard at the same time, you know. But understanding that it actually is simple and that you're creating the difficulty. And that's a lot of people don't make it through that. A lot of people don't get past that part. And I'm lucky that I've been able to do enough of the work to where I am setting – I set boundaries in my life.

I'm doing things where I know that I'm not putting myself in positions to go to old behaviors. Right. You know, like whether it comes to becoming attached to a woman or like in a relationship, like all these things. attached to a woman or like in a relationship like all these things like if i can't be you know if i can't just be me and be happy like i need somebody to bring that then then i'm off there's something that's wrong you know and i'll get there and then i'll have to figure it and i'll back up and do it again and it's a you know it's this huge process but how do you um I want to ask you this. How do you deal with – I mean, our business is a lot of weed especially, pills, alcohol. How do you deal? Everywhere you work has alcohol.

I'm not tempted. Good. Like I don't right now, and I haven't. I mean, it was so bad that I know that I'll lose everything, and I can't lose everything again. There's no – might not be no coming back from that one. I agree. Most likely not. Most people don't make it back out.

I'm lucky I made it back out of that relapse. Your blood work and everything's good now and everything. You go get checked out. Yeah, I mean, you know, a year later, a lot of those things fix themselves. Is that right? If you're young and you didn't go too far. But your brain, I mean, that takes years. The chemical imbalance there is years and i remember you know when i got out i was seeing somebody and and she kind of ended it because

there's this rule like you can't be with somebody in your first year of sobriety they say oh no relationship at all okay yeah they just you know it's like best there's nowhere in a book that says that it's just like hey realistically you shouldn't be work on yourself yeah yeah yeah and so this woman was like very strong and and and solid in that and i it just again like took me down to a place and i remember i i was trying to call her i was trying to get a hold of her and finally we talked and i was driving on hyperion, I remember. And I was just crying. I was out of sorts. And she goes, Nick, the way that you're talking right now, I've heard people talk like this and commit suicide that day. The way that you're talking.

You need to call your doctor and you need to get on medication. And they'd offer me medication and rehab. I'm like, I don't need that stuff. But the thing is, as you've been drinking, all the levels of the things that are going into your brain to make you feel things are off and depleted. They're gone. Like my body can't create serotonin. My body can't make these things that I need to be level, to like be a human.

I've ruined that, you know? And she said like right now, who you gonna call what's the name and i was like i'll just call the doctor from rehab i guess and i just did and the next day i started medication you know and it saved my life yeah and good you know i'm from the it's funny i i've talked about this because i take my medication as well and i didn't want to i felt like i had no problem with therapy where a lot of guys are like fuck that shit i have no problem with the therapy opening up talking meditation journaling self-help self-help but medication to me seemed like a crutch or a cheat code like

a lot of the way i feel like i felt about medication the way a lot of people feel about therapy you know i'm like what's the matter with that? And then other people are like, yo, and yeah, it works. It fucking works. And you don't always find the right one either. Like everyone's body is different. I can't tell you how many different fucking blood pressure medications I took or whatever until I found whatever is minimal to my – It's funny though.

There's so many people that – it's not funny. It's realistic and it makes sense to be honest. But a lot of people are like, oh, I can't take that anymore because it makes it so I can't orgasm or it makes it so I can't like, I can't like get hard. Like whatever these like things

that they want their body to be able to do, this medication is affecting that in a way. And they're not willing to make that sacrifice. And because of that, they're gonna now be living with this thing that's horrible, you know? And maybe that means there's another medication that doesn't do that.

You can keep going and trying and doing whatever, but like, you know, the side effects, if they're not life-threatening, are so great. Because I also don't believe that medication's forever it's you know like my body needed it my brain needed it and then there's a part of me that's like you know over the pandemic i was like i want to start getting off this and they were like we we want you to too let's wait for the pandemic to be over it's pretty dark right now you know like let's you shouldn't be trying to do this right now by the way they're delivering alcohol to your house now oh yeah yeah you know

like it's not the time to do it oh my god yeah i i mean when i found out about door dash delivering booze is before before there was like another beverage app or whatever before the pandemic that's what a lot of my drinks were getting delivered like that and i was like secretly in the middle of the night like rushing out and grabbing a bottle of anyways. Yeah. Yeah. It, it, um, you know, I'm not like an advocate for, I'm not, I'm not like speaking for a company. I just know that what my friend told me that day changed my life that saved my life because it's you know it's I realize that I'm not above the darkest worst stuff which is suicide which is you know thinking that I don't matter thinking that other people are better off if they don't have to deal with me in their day

you know but that's the thing is that those are all my thoughts right and you know what those people are also having their own thoughts and to think that everyone is that concerned about me and that i'm affecting other people's lives that much is a sickness that came from my alcohol you know and now i'm like getting over it realizing like oh i don't need to believe the lie that alcohol has been telling me all this time yeah and you know and now i'm like getting over it realizing like oh i don't need to believe the lie that alcohol has been telling me all this time yeah and you know what yeah you've done some shit that some people probably are never going to really want to be close to you again because of even if you've changed and that's not their fault it's your fault there's nothing you need to fix it

and there's nothing you can do to like that's gonna dwell like why dwell on what other people are thinking about you it's just literally none of my business which is the hardest thing it really is it's none of our business somebody blocked me on somebody unfollowed me on instagram a friend i found it so weird he stopped responding to my text and he unfollowed me this is like past bright. I'm like sober at this point. And I was in Canada shooting something. And I remember like, I still followed him. So I'd like see his stuff. And every time I saw him post, it like made me think what's wrong with me. Why didn't this person, you know, like what, or like nobody likes me. Nobody likes me. This guy doesn't like me, you know? And then one day I was in this thing and I was like, who fucking cares what this fucking guy thinks of you?

It does not matter. And it's not about you. Cause I know that I didn't do anything to deserve that really. I hadn't. And so I just decided to be okay with it. And then I run into this guy six months later and he was a sober guy and he's drinking and I see exactly why it all happened he's going through his own shit just like everybody else it has nothing to do with me nothing him unfollowing me was a fallout because I'm somebody he can tell that is not gonna be okay with him doing that yeah so he's getting away from you yeah and every time he saw something I posted he remembered Oh Nick fixed his life and now mine's not fixed. I can't fix whatever. Maybe also he just hates me. Who cares?

You know, it's not my business. And if I make it my business, you know, it's like, it's so funny, like how you can like feel out if you've done something dumb, like you talk to somebody else, like, oh, you talked to so-and-so lately. Yeah. I feel like he's not talking to me. Has he said anything? Like, you know, all of these things, like you're trying to do research to find out. You're wasting so much time. Then you find out like someone in their family died and they're going through a fucking divorce and they're going through and you're like, oh, shit. Yeah.

Oh, shit. My bad. Yeah. And it's these attachments, you know, it's like this insecure, this anxious attachment that you have to people where if they're off, it throws you off. Whereas you can't just be like securely attached. And if they're having their own thing, be like, hey, have your thing. I'll be here. That's right.

Yeah, man. I'm not going to judge it. I'm not going to make it about me, which is the hardest thing to do all the time. You know, constantly trying to make things about me, which is the hardest thing to do all the time. Constantly trying to make things about myself. Like the weather. If I really follow the thoughts, everything's about me. A traffic jam, all of it. It's to keep me from what I need to do.

It's, oh, I could have done this, but now I can't because of this fucking weather. Obviously. All right, so everything we've talked about. I mentioned before advice you would give to your 16-year-old self. Now, everything we rehab was first at 17. What advice,

that's a pretty pivotal age for you, what advice would you give yourself? That none of it lasts all of the things that you're in don't last you mean good and bad yeah they don't i mean but specifically the insecurities the um the level of hierarchy in whatever your click is or your school or whatever none of that lasts we all turn 18 we move on we come back we see other people people that were mean to us are now nice a guy that we thought sucked and was like better than us at everything is now working in real estate doing pretty well for himself, but probably hates it. You know, like no one, it just doesn't last. And stop thinking that what you do that day lasts forever in these people's minds.

And really, the only person that you should be trying to impress is the 42-year-old version of yourself. You know? Because the things that I did right when I look back, I'm like, wow't believe i had that strength you know so funny i just said this to a friend of mine the other day i was like god if i could just go back as like a a ghost and hover over my 17 year old self and watch myself for a little bit i'd be like what a fucking asshole you know what i mean like you said that out loud and what if you did. Yeah, but yes, taking that 16-year-old kid and going, look, I know you're no parents and you're at your lowest, but I promise you. In 35 years, I'm like, what? I got to get how much longer?

I got to do this shit more. Dude, I remember at 15, a pivotal moment. Like, how long? I'm going to be like that for this long? Okay. And I'm, okay, great, great. I'm not going to get any taller. Okay.

But I remember when I was 15, a teacher did this exercise one day where he was like, let's just break down, like, how do you want to live when you're 35? You know, you want to be in a house? You want to be in an apartment? Do you want to live in a city? Do you want to live in a suburb? Do you want to drive a sports car? Do you want to drive this car? Do you want to have kids? Do you want to be in a house? You want to be in an apartment? Do you want to live in a city? Do you want to live in a suburb? Do you want to drive a sports car? Do you want to drive this car?

Do you want to have kids? Do you want to have this? And you go through it and you put all that together. And then there was an equation that calculated how much money you needed to make a year to support the life that you thought you wanted to have when you're 35. And then they take that number and they show you the careers that can earn that. And it's a real wakening moment. I obviously never forgot about it, you know, where I was just like, oh, wow.

And I lowered, I immediately lowered what I wanted my life to be. I was like, I don't need a house. Right away, yeah. Because I'm like, I'm never going to make that much money. Like, how am I going to gonna do that i don't need a car man that's great advice though it doesn't last it doesn't it doesn't no dude thank you for coming on for real uh this was i learned a lot more about you i didn't know i'm glad you're healthy good for you yeah thank you uh straight um and and would you be interested in going into

a backflip program with me i would love to dude that would going into a backflip program with me? I would love to, dude. That would be great. A backflip program for adults. I remember seeing comedians do it. I think Tripoli might have used to do a backflip back in the day. And I would always think, man, like at some point, you're not going to be able to pull that off.

I wonder. I mean, I don't know him as ever doing a backflip. I don't know if it was him. It might have been him and I talking about this guy that always did a flip. And I'm like, hey. There was a couple guys that do it. There's like a guy now that does it on stage, I think. Still?

Or as a young guy, probably. Yeah. I mean, but it's worth it. It's like, I don't know. Would you do it? Yeah, fuck yeah. Not in stand-up, I wouldn't. I would do it at the meet and greets, bro.

You don't know. I'd do it at the meet and greets. You don't know. Plug and promote everything again, please. Oh, yeah. October 8th Chicago the Den Theater

and just you know I don't know find me on Instagram alright as always RyanSickler.com Ryan Sickler

on all social media we will talk to y'all next week week.