The Hope Hotline - All About Co-Dependency!

Episode Date: February 7, 2025

All About Co-Dependency!

Real talk. Real talk. Real talk. Hello and welcome to the Hope Hotline. Hope you guys are doing great today. It is a beautiful day in Florida. It is a beautiful day in Florida. Thank you, Jesus.

Yes, exactly. Not too hot, not too cold. Yes. Perfect. Wonderful. At night, it's sweatshirt weather. Yes. Sweater weather.

Sweater weather. It's a beautiful day. I am, I was telling the girls, I was going to surprise my girlfriend, Pastor Clover, and go to her ladies' night, which if you don't have anything to do tonight, you should go. Because I didn't even know it was coming up until my girlfriend, Karen, told me, hey, I'm going. Do you want to go?

And I'm like, well, the thing is, is they're like having major reconstruction because they're having growth at their church. So because they've had so much growth, they've had to buy new sets of parcels onto their church. That's a good thing. That is. But she's had to change that her, when she's been doing these, her ladies nights, which we're doing ours,

our dare to be is in two weeks, the 21st. That's right. Hey, she's already got it going. She'll be talking about it. Yep. So we're going to be doing that,

but hers is tonight. So if're going to be doing that. But hers is tonight. So if you don't have nothing to do, go to that. It's in, we'll get you the address. We'll put it up. Yeah, I'm looking up to see if she has a little ladies thing. She does. Rooted Women's Meeting.

Got it. And she asked me to speak tonight. So I'm pretty happy and pretty stoked about that. But if you don't have nothing to do, 7 p.m. 7 p.m. And you'll get the address. Beauty. God bless you, child.

I love you very much. Talia comes in in the clench. Of course. Always. Yeah. So we're going to do that tonight. What are you guys doing tonight? It's Friday night.

What am I doing tonight? What are you doing tonight? I don't know yet. I mean, we leave on Sunday. And I have a lot of stuff that I need to do. So do I. Yeah. I totally can feel for you right there.

Unfortunately, I had to adult all day yesterday. Yeah. And I just don't want to appreciate that. But I still have more adulting to do before we leave. That sucks. I know. But it is what it is. A lot, a lot of, a lot.

Well, I have people staying at my house, taking care of my animal. Okay, that's good. Yeah. That's taken care of. Thank God. Tom would have a fit. Exactly. Exactly.

So I've got to make sure my house is clean. Yes. Because whoever is staying there is probably going to judge you. They might. You never know. You never know. I know their mother would. Yes.

For sure. Oh, my gosh. Let's see. But they're way older than their mother their mother's not staying with them but um so yeah i i got a lot of laundry and stuff to do yeah exactly so i'll wait i'll wait till the last minute me too i need a sense of urgency right uh yes yeah always you're going somewhere who me yeah i am i just found that out the following week so you guys are gone next week i leave for mexico the following week didn't weren't you just in mexico we were but this time living her best life it's just a date so it it's actually a work trip for Jeff that I get to tag along with him so while he has to sit through meetings I can sit by the pool I used to do that with Tom when he had to go on his uh what do you call that uh conferences those they were so boring and listen

when you have small children and you got to take them with you which i did you didn't you didn't go anywhere when your kids were small no we didn't yeah you're getting this life when you're older i have teens now and then you only you stick somebody with them at the house my mom yeah i mean i know come on favor favor of the Lord right there. Yeah. I would never leave my house unoccupied. Yeah. Same. Well, I can't because my dog, but I would never leave my house. But he's like a little bit of a ferocious bee, you know, kind of thing.

Yes, he is. Holy moly. I would hate to be the person that knocks on the door and enters into my house without not being invited. Absolutely not. Right. Never in a million years. That could get ugly real quick. Not worth it.

Whatever you want, not worth it. No. At all. But when I used to take my kids, and when they were little, Tom would be gone for long periods of time with just me and the kids. And I was like, this is not a vacation. No, this is not.

It's a trip. It's a trip. When you bring kids, it's a trip. It's like bringing your home life just on the road. Right. Which is way more complicated. All the extra stuff you have to bring.

And I say it in one word. Oh my gosh. Horrible. Don't. Okay. It's better than I thought. Horrible. all the extra stuff you have to bring and i say it in one word oh my god horrible don't okay it's better than i thought it's horrible i was like you're you're away what's so what could be so bad um being locked in one room with two loud precocious uh children that that are full of life and vigor and want to argue back and forth with one another and I can't get away from them. Oh my gosh. There's no locking yourself anywhere.

I'm going out on the balcony. I'm jumping and you'll be, you just wait till your dad gets back. You would never. They were so sweet. Sweet pumpkin pie. Literally, if my kids were bad, which they really weren't, I don't know what I would have done with myself.

I know, right? I didn't have bad kids. They were just normal kids, but they weren't bad. I mean, literally, I said do something, and almost always they did it. Like, I really have never had one ounce of hard trouble with either one of my kids. I never heard I hate you. I never heard, I hate you. I never, nothing. I never dealt with any of that unkind meanness.

I just never, they were disrespectful at times, but not even like really disrespectful. Yeah. Like I was horrible. I was like, I was horribly disrespectful to my mother, never to my dad. Yeah. You knew better. Right. I wanted to live. I mother, never to my dad. Yeah, you knew better. Right. I wanted to live.

I wanted to live and not die. But my kids never, I never dealt with anything with them. Yeah, same. Really. I mean, so minor. Yeah. So minor with what, and never really nasty. And I would say, if I i was gonna say they were like a

little snotty or something was usually like that passive-aggressive kind of trying to be funny but and i'm like figuring that out i'm familiar with that and i'm like i ain't got time for it like go tell somebody that wants to hear that yeah i got no time part of my problem too is I don't take things like I really don't care so I might have taught been talked bad to in a certain way but because I really don't care I might not have recognized that's a great observation which I'm just now realizing it right now that is a really good observation I literally am thinking to myself would I have known that they were being snotty? Yeah. I might not have been known they were snotty because I really don't care when people are, for the most part.

Right. You don't. They would have had been out and out. Yeah. And then I've been like, cool your jets. Yeah. Yeah. And you would have said that.

You wouldn't have let it go past that point. But I mean, like when your kid says, I can't stand you or you're horrible or like, yeah, I want a different mom, whatever. Never in a million years. Like that's out in my face, I guess. I don't know. I don't know how parents, like I could barely handle what I had to handle, which obviously wasn't much. But I can't imagine having to handle what some parents go through. Right.

I don't know why I thought of Dr. Phil right now, but I used to watch Dr. Phil all the time back in the day. Oh, yeah, me too. No way. Always. Yes, okay. All the time. And he would always have these rebellious teens

that come on on the show. And there was this one girl who was like, catch me outside. How about that? Remember that girl? That was adopted. No, I don't know anything about this. What was like, catch me outside. How about that? Remember that girl? That was adopted. No, I don't know anything about this. What do you mean catch me outside?

What? She told that to Dr. Phil. Yeah, she was all over the internet for that. There was like a remix to that and everything. Catch me outside and what? How about that? How about that? Catch me outside.

How about that? She was very rebellious. Very rebellious. So she told Dr. Phil she wanted to fight him? Yes. Yes. What an idiot. Yes.

I mean, she sounds familiar. Listen, that's how stupid I was. Oh my gosh. I talk to people like that. Adults. Like, I should be dead. Yes. I literally should not be alive but as a kid or how stupid i was i loved coming home from school and watching it was dr phil and it was um montel william oh my gosh jerry springer i was like oh j Jerry Springer was super popular. I didn't want, I wasn't allowed to watch that one. I snuck that one. I wanted to know.

Oh my God. Jerry, Jerry, Oh, Maury, yes. Do you want to know a fun fact? Yes.

I went, I sat through a taping of Maury. Maury Povich. Maury Povich. Like, who's the father? Oh, I'm trying to figure out who Maury Povich is.

I, I sat through a taping in studio during who is the father oh my god okay was that like a um who is the father was that like where paternity test okay yes and then they would run out like they would run to the back of the the stage because they couldn't believe that the man that that they thought was the father wasn't the father. It was a mess. I'm going to ask ChatGPT if any of this was real. Do we not want to know?

They're addicted to ChatGPT. Go, go, go, go in the crowd. You were saying go, go, go. Oh, I could totally see that. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Where is it? We need this.

It's the atmosphere. I don't know why I just thought of all that. Your mother let you do that? I know. I don't know if she knew I was going to the Maury show, but by then I was already 18. Oh yeah, you can't really do nothing about that. I mean, it is what it is.

Listen, that was like the most rebellious thing I ever did. That's nothing. From personal knowledge, that's nothing. Oh yeah, the judge. What's her name? Judge Judy. Judge Judy. Yes.

My dad likes those too. He watches them all the time. Okay, don't even get me started on your dad. He's like, did you hear that? I'm like, I don't think this is real. I don't think this is TV. I think all of this is scripted. He's like, no, no, it's real.

It's real. No, don't even get me started on that. I'm fine. Please. He loves it. I'm not surprised in the slightest. Now, can you guys tell us on the chat, and then we're going to get going with this.

Can you tell us on the chat, when you guys are watching the podcast, this particular podcast, if you keep getting interrupted live with commercials? Live and then the replays as well. So I think we kind of figured out what it was. If you don't have Rumble Premium and you're trying to watch the replay, it seems like the ads have gotten a million times worse. I think the lives are okay, but please let us know if you are. I think you would have probably let us know. But if you've noticed,

if you're a replay watcher and you don't have premium, please let us know if you have noticed the ads have increased. Yes. Okay, live. Everybody's saying no live. But do you guys have premium?

Court, Sharon, Anne-Marie, do you guys have premium? Also, Sharon, Anne-Marie, do you guys have premium? Also, let me know. Because that's important. Yeah, because apparently, apparently, they're going off the rails with the ads.

So Galena said, not when you start from the beginning, but when you exit live and go back, it will play, she said, five-second ads. So Galena said, not when you start from the beginning, but when you exit live and go back, it will play, she said five second ads. How many of them? But not on the live. They don't, nobody has premium either. Okay. This is, this is good information guys. Yes. Galena, when you go back and start like rewatching the live, how many ads, like, like every five minutes? Yeah. And then Jolene said she doesn't premium but replay has tons of ads interesting yeah we realize that that has been become an issue so yes um yeah when i go through all the things we'll talk about it a little bit more um please yeah okay Only one ad when it's live and you go back,

but you can skip the ad when it's live. Okay. Well, that's good. Yep. It's killing people that are going back and watching it. That's the reason why we're getting, yeah,

they're switching over back that. And the issue is, is like, if you go watch it on Facebook, it's hard for us to know how many people are truly watching it because Facebook will count like seconds. So we're just we're trying to like gauge like and I don't want to keep sharing a rumble link if everybody's having to watch ads every five minutes. So we're trying to figure out that as well.

So I've been sharing YouTube as well. Yes. Okay. We need that. Good feedback, guys. Thank you so much for that. Yeah. And then do you want to just get the kind I put the address up real quick with you?

Yeah, let's do all of it. Do your stuff, girl. So I'll switch over to this full screen so you guys can see it even better. So if you're going to go to the River Church tonight, it starts at seven o'clock. They said seven to 10, but I don't know how accurate that is. But get there before seven. It is in Fort Myers and it's on Cypress Terrace. So head over there, Suite 204 and 205.

I'm sure it will be very obvious where they're at, 7051 Cypress Terrace, Suite 205, or four to 205 in Fort Myers, Florida. I think it's North Fort Myers, so it's not all the way down there. Yeah, it's not that, it's not as far. Not too bad, not too bad. All right, so yeah, head over there tonight

and it'll be a great time because we love Pastor Clover. Oh my gosh. She's the best. Okay. So here we are. If you're on Facebook and you want to head over to Rumble, that's where the live chat is. So if it's a live stream, head over there. You can have all the conversations in the world. We've got a lot going on over there. Everybody's chit-chatting. So that's great. Love to see you guys over there. If you're watching the replay, let us know in the comments. Give us a little bit of a heads up. If you're watching the replay on Facebook or YouTube, just write replay in there and then I'll be able to go back and kind of gauge it. And maybe I can help figure out where we're at. All these platforms are not making it easy on us, but that's okay.

We'll figure it out. If you're in black robe, same thing. You can send a little message and you can just let us know that you're watching there. And YouTube. So YouTube is fine until we say something they don't like. But if you go back and watch the replay, if they've left it and didn't give us any strikes, then you're good to go to watch it on there. But again, if you are watching in the live stream, just head over to Rumble. We got some fun conversations going on and this one will be a good one today. We've got some interesting topics that we're going to talk about. So I want to hear your opinion and what you guys think about this stuff and maybe some, you know, whatever, if Hope's saying something specific and you have something interesting to talk about, let's have that conversation. All right. And then next we need your questions. Keep sending them in,

askhopeathopehotline.com. You can always send them in to the email. And then if you want to drop it in the live chat, you can. But just in case there is, if you're in Rumble, there's a comment area right underneath the live chat. Or if you're on a desktop, it's over on the other side of it. So you can do that. Also, if you are in Rumble, if you could just repost and just say, with me, watch live. Let's see what that does. We'll see if that gets out to the masses. But yeah, send the emails over if you want. You can put a comment somewhere. But if you get an email, you'll get an email response back that will say that we got your email. We are on Instagram and we are on TikTok as well. So we got some fun stuff going on over there. You want to make sure you follow us. If you go over, repost our stuff and do all the good

stuff. Thank you for supporting us on all of these platforms. You can also support us when you go to foundationchurchfl.com and you click shop. There's different merch and we've got some other ideas. So stay tuned for those. Hope I'm going to share this one. Yes? Yes. Okay. And then this is the next one.

So we got Dare to Be February 21st, 7 to 9.30 p.m. It is going to be awesome. So please, please come. We are getting back into the swing of things after the holidays. So make sure you're there. It's going to be a great night. Ladies only. So we need you guys to come, which means there is no child care.

Is that correct? There isn't any child care. Yes, because your husbands are home. So they can hang out with the babies. Or if you guys have like middle kids, like 10, 11, have dad take them out. Go do something fun. That's always fun. Allison loves doing that kind of stuff.

And then next, we've got Crave coming up March 8th. So a night of worship, again, 7 to 9.30 p.m. So you want to mark these two things off on your calendar so that you can be there. Please invite people to these things. These are great opportunities to come into the building, to be able to see a different perspective of other things that we've got going on besides just our Sundays. We've got so many hubs. We've got so many different dynamics in this church and people are going to want this stuff. So if you get them in the door, then the Holy Spirit will do the rest and you've done the

hard work. And I think that is it for today. Cool. We are, like, I am having major problems with my computer. I jacked it up. So thank God for Talia. She went and printed what I needed off on my other computer. But that's a problem because I still have to find my message for tonight on here. It's on there, but I got to take this one with me.

Yeah. The problem is my account's not working. That's where we're having a problem. So let's get going. Hold on. Let me just try one more thing, guys. Yeah. I want to find a catch me outside.

How about this? You should. But also. No, not on that computer. Someone's asking about new merch. Is that in process? I know. It's Sharon. Sharon, I know.

I know. She wants new merch. So I've got to talk to. I've got to talk to Heather. Because she's my. We should have one that says catch me outside. Catch me outside. How about that?

Oh, my gosh. I know. catch me outside. Catch me outside. How about that? Oh my gosh. I know. That's funny. I know. We need a screen recorder. Okay. We're going to try and get the, we're going to get a little catch me outside. How about that soon?

Oh man. I think that'll be good. But yeah, but I know you, I know Sharon's asked about a specific merch item. What is it? She wants like Pastor Tom's zip up, like a thing with the whole pot line on it. That would be cute. Oh, that would be cute. I would rock that.

Okay. That actually is a really good idea. Foundation Church has one and then TLP has one. So we could go gray. It's only natural. And do the whole pot line and do it like that. Or we could do pink. Pink.

Black. White. Pink would be cool. I like teal. Teal? For teal. So we'll have to see with the logo. We'll have to do some.

And I got to get in touch with my people. Your people need to get with her people yeah exactly all right all right okay I think I'm I'm thinking of in trouble people but it'll be all right I'm gonna just totally try this one last thing I think you should tell the story about Leah about what I'm camped out in Genesis right now and Leah and Rachel, if you haven't read that story, you have to. Please do yourself a favor

and do that. They're disgusting. But like true sister wives. I thought I was watching an episode of Sister Wives. Right. Those two. With their dad. No, no, no. That's not Leah and Rachel. Who are you talking about? Leah and Rachel. Oh not Leah and Rachel With what's his name Who are you talking about

Leah and Rachel Oh Leah and Rachel Oh yeah yeah yeah With Jacob With Jacob and Rachel Gotcha Poor Jacob is in the middle Of this triangle

I mean Not really his fault Not his fault He got tricked Laban Yeah but you know why He got tricked Because you reap what you sow

Oh That's the reason why You lie Not team Jacob You lie. Not Team Jacob. You lie. It's coming for you. Whatever you do is coming back for you. Just when I thought I was Team Jacob.

You reap what you sow. See, the thing is, is he never had to be deceptive. God had already, when that child was in his mother's womb, the Lord specifically said the older will serve the younger. If they wouldn't have taken matters into their own hands, like we do so often and let God work it out, that would have never happened. That's a sermon right there.

It is a sermon. It is a sermon. But that's not what people do. They begin to not trust God. They don't cast their cares upon him. And that care becomes too heavy. So they decide they're going to take matters into their hands. They lie, cast their cares upon him. And that care becomes too heavy so they decide they're going to take matters into their hands. They lie so they get lied to.

That's where it goes. I do not feel bad for him. Mic drop. But poor Leah, she has to forever be described as someone with weak eyes. Well, Leah has her own problems. Do you want to hear my take on Leah?

I do. I do. I do. I'm trying to stall for you, but yes, please. Here's my view on Leah. Leah's got her own problems. You know why, Leah? Leah could have stood up to her father to a certain extent.

Ooh, okay. And said, you know what? You promised him her, not me. He will resent me. I want somebody who will love me. But back then, people were owned, if you will. They were property. But those two girls had enough say because they weren't too afraid to go to their dad and say,

Hey, we want some of ours. You go to your dad and say that? She was an opportunist. She knew she had weak eyes. True. Her eyes were crossed. She was an opportunist. She knew she had weak eyes. True. She knew her eyes were crossed. She's like, this is my only opportunity.

There's a reason why she kept being passed over. Sometimes you can help it. Quit going for, quit going for this when maybe you should just be happy with this. Maybe with the fives.

Yeah. Don't go for the 10. Right. Don't go for like the five six. Manipulative women. They'll get fives. Yeah. Don't go for the 10. Right. Like the five, six manipulative women. They'll get you nowhere, men.

Right. Yeah. Be careful. Right. But her, she knew better. They all knew better. All of them. That's true.

All of our connivers and manipulators. That's true. And they had, they had their own plans. So how did he not know it was her until the morning time? Because their faces would be covered. That's what we thought. Yeah.

Until you consummated. But it was at night when they went in. And it was dark. I remember waking up to Leah instead of Rachel. If you don't think a screech was heard throughout that camp, you are sorely mistaken. Oh, my gosh. And it wasn't her.

And he worked seven years for this moment. Oh my gosh. Could you imagine? I'd be so mad. It reminds me of the Shania Twain song, From This Moment. That is one hot mess right there. That is.

Not cool. Not cool at all. But all of them deserved what they all got including rachel i know i'm i'm great now i know i don't feel bad anymore for any of these people you've released me yeah now no one should listen like The great thing about the Bible is, and I say this, the great thing about the Bible is there's no mystery. People will say, we'll never know what God does, what he does. No, he makes it pretty clear why things have played out like they have for the most part. Every story, it's like when there's war, when there's war,

like even our own wars that we study history and everything. When we study history, what we're trying to do is find out why that happened, right? What took place to make that happen? A lot of times we don't know because people aren't honest about how things transpire. But the word of God is very clear. When we won, we know how we won because what happened is the story is fully transposed or transparent for us. Like when the armies were coming up against the Israelites, the three armies, the Amorites, the whatever, Hittites or whatever, when all of them were coming up against the Israelites,

the Lord said, you're not gonna have to do a thing. This is what I want you to do. And when they went and did what he told them to do, they all turned against themselves. See, in our own history, we don't even understand how all things played out, but God made sure so that we had more faith in him that we would understand from beginning to end how it all happened. So there's no mystery. There's no

question mark. Why? Why does God do what he does? No, we know why he did what he, because he promised them from the beginning to the end, I will take care you i will protect you but if you don't do these things i'll lift my hand from you yeah so there's no like like when you again there's no mystery you reap what you sow and it is clear and most times when bad things were happening to people, it wasn't God pouring out vengeance. It was they made bad choices, so they're reaping. It's cause and effect. That's not a biblical approach to it. It is like a scientific or a school term that we learned in elementary school,

cause and effect. And it is still true. It's still the same as karma or reaping what you sow. Those are all the world's terminology for the biblical principle of you reap what you sow. Yeah. But it is true. You do something, you're getting something back.

Right. And they all did because they all did. All of them. All of them. All of them. I sure did. Including mama. Yep. I know.

Because she helped deceive her own husband. She did. You reap what you sow. But even he reaped what he sowed because he wanted to bless Esau before it was time. You did not bless until, and if he would have waited when God told him to, none of this would have happened. Come on, Isaac. Esau and Jacob would have done when, if he would have waited when God told him to, none of this would have happened.

Esau and Jacob would have never hated each other. Well, it was predicted they would, but I'm just saying that because Jacob didn't do what he was supposed to, he should have never had Esau. I mean, the whole thing. Do you know what I'm saying? It's a whole.

It's a whole thing. A whole thing. And it all comes from disobedience and stepping out and doing things in your own might versus his. True. Don't do it unless he tells you to do it. I love what Pastor Rodney says about that all the time. Pastor Rodney says all the time.

Sorry. Pastor Rodney says all the time, Only do what he tells you to do and only go where he tells you to go. Nothing more, nothing less. You will save yourself a lot of heartache. Yeah, a lot of heartache. And only say what he tells you to say. I was just telling somebody this this past week. When I say I feel like the Holy Spirit has told me something, it is very rare that you're going to hear me say, thus saith the Lord. I will. The word is very clear. Don't put words in his mouth. And if you do, you better make you better be sure beyond a shadow of a doubt that he said it to you. If he didn't say it to you, don't say that he did. You, it's one thing to say, I feel like he's

telling me this, or he feel like the Holy Spirit's told me this. Right. Okay. Because we miss it. Right. The more, the more you hear that gut and the more you become more familiar with it and the more you are more confident in what you feel you're hearing, the more you'll be able to say, thus saith the Lord. But even that, like Pastor Rodney even says, I don't say the Lord told me this. He's like, he says a lot of times he'll say, well, like something similar to what I just said, because he's very, very careful about putting words in God's mouth.

It's like you're not to add to God's word. You're not to subtract from it. And what do people do all the time? They're adding to the word and they're subtracting from it. That's a scary thing to do. That's why you got to preach the full gospel. Yep.

Got to do it. Yep. So, okay, guys, I'm lost because I'm having to use paper. God bless you, Talia, for printing that out for me. She's the best. I would be so in trouble right now. I was afraid this might happen.

But I didn't speak it, but it still happened. Yeah, the look in. It's because I don't know software. I know. I don't know how to get in and out of accounts. And it's already complicated. You've already like, it's like mingled. I'm sure some of you feel my pain.

Okay, so what we're going to do is, I'm going to put it like this because I can't really see it. And then I have to wear my blue glasses for my computer. Whatever. All right. I really do love these two questions. I'm hoping we'll get to both of them. Probably not.

But the first question is about codependency. And in today's society, I mean, oh my gosh, we are seeing codependency like never before. And there are so many reasons for this. Ladies, do you agree with me? Like when you're ministering to people, a lot of times it stems from codependency. On something or someone, it's almost always a person.

Either they're codependent on a person or a person's codependent on them. It's very, very unhealthy. How many of you guys know, like, I'll give you one little example of what I'm talking about. How many of you guys know of people who are high maintenance? High maintenance is unattractive, but there are some that love people who are high maintenance. You know why? They love being codependent. They love somebody that just relies so heavily on them. They love that it gives them, like, the odds are, growing up, they grew up in a dysfunctional home where somebody was either an alcoholic

or a drug addict or had some mental illness or something. They grew up having somebody be dependent on them. So they don't know what it's like to be a normal person. And so what they do is, and a high maintenance person loves somebody that loves being codependent on. You know why? Because they can use and abuse that person

and have that person as their personal doormat or whatever to fulfill their need of being high maintenance. Listen, I'm thinking of a high maintenance person right now. I wouldn't want to be within 10 feet of this person. They are a miserable cuss, but their husband waits on them left and right. And he doesn't even realize it. That's the scary part. That's the scary part because they're so abused. and he doesn't even realize it. Yeah.

That's the scary part. That's the scary part because they're so abused. Right. Both sides. That they don't even realize it. Yeah. They think that this person loves them so much because this person needs them so much,

even though this person is ugly and nasty and mean to them. But they need me. Right. Right. What would they do if they didn't have me? They'd live. They'd straighten up and fly right. The best thing that could ever happen to them is you tell them no. That's the best thing. But a lot of times we don't want to do that because we're as reliant on them as they are on us. And that's not the word of God. And that is not good. It's all bad because what's now has taken place is you are taking the place of God for them.

And they're letting you take the place of God for them. It's not good. It's not healthy. That's opposite of what the word of God says. This question is, I have been hearing a lot about codependency lately. Does the Bible talk about it, and what do you think about that term? The Bible talks a lot about it. Let's look at the definition of codependency. It's a psychological condition or a relationship in which a person manifesting low self-esteem

and a strong desire for approval has an unhealthy attachment to another, often controlling or manipulative person, such as a person with an addiction to alcohol or drugs. Or somebody who's so consumed with themselves. Or somebody who's a

freaking control freak. And listen, you're talking to a control freak. I love control. The peanut guttler will tell you, I love control. You know what you like. But, there's, there's, there's, everything's within reason. There's a balance to everything. You can be in control without it being unhealthy. Like I like things being in control because I like things being done in excellence. Yeah. I like knowing

that when it's done, because a lot of everything we do around here, even like a lot of everything we do around here is as unto the Lord. And if it doesn't, if it isn't as unto the Lord, it's pretty close to be attached to something that is as unto the Lord. In fact, it's the same way for you. If you're working on your job, you should have some kind of control over what's going on.

And you should want that. And it should be done in excellence. Why? Because everything you do is a statement about your Christian walk. Hopefully everybody that you work with knows you're a believer. So everything you do should look like Jesus. It should be done like Jesus. It should look like Jesus. It should be done like Jesus. It should look like Jesus.

It should sound like Jesus. As unto the Lord. So that you're winning more souls. So that you're a great example of people wanting to have what you have. If you come in late. If you're not honest. If you don't take accountability for your actions. That's not as unto the lord and people

know you're a liar and they think you're like the world and they don't believe you're a christian and if you are they think you're an awful weak one and it ain't what they would want as a believer am i wrong ladies no that's very accurate well two business owners uh would know that yeah it's ridiculous when you hire a christ, do you have a certain expectation of them that you have different of somebody in the world? Yes. And it's sad when most of them don't rise to the occasion. Correct? Yep. Yep. It's disappointing. Yeah, for sure. Very disappointing. Because everything they do should be stellar. It should be with a higher level

of integrity and excellence. Every single one of us should operate like that. Are we going to get it every time? No. But for the most part, you really should be hitting it out of the park every single time. That takes control. That's not allowing somebody to control your destiny. So you might have to become

a little bit of a control freak instead of somebody who's just like, okay. You'll never see me be like that. True. All right. Can't do it. No. Even Vanessa, who is not a control freak, does, I'm just,

because you aren't a control freak. I'm just because you aren't a control freak. I'm not. But the stuff that you do, as unto the Lord. Right. And you're not like, okay. Because you'd be like, no, not happening. Even though you're not a control freak. But there is a

balance. There's a level of control that you do have without being someone like me. Absolutely. You being someone like me absolutely you you are more like me tracy and that like you're not as i mean you're nice as she is i'm just saying in life you have you're forced to be like no we're not doing it like this she her level of owning the business is different to your level of owning a business. So even in the positions that you've been put at the church,

you kind of got to like, the buck stops here, which is me. So we're not doing this. It just depends on- Different roles. Exactly. Yeah, because Vanessa's is like with worship. She did it unto the Lord,

but that was between her and God. Yeah, but if somebody would have told her yeah it's not this way it's that way and she and her spirit was like no they're wrong yeah yeah she'd be like no yeah absolutely yeah but it is like that right and she does have a say in her husband's husband's business to a certain degree if you saw something spiritually that you thought was out of whack. Oh, absolutely. We'll have a conversation about it. And I think that's being,

when you're rooted in, in God's word and you are led by the spirit, like you can't, like I, the spirit inside of me won't let me be like codependent and, and, and be controlling in that way. Yeah.

So, yeah, it just, and it boils down to that. Like if you, if you're a spirit led and if you're in his word, like you can't be toxic. Which codependency is extremely toxic. Yeah. It is not good. You'll never have a healthy relationship with a significant other. if you are codependent or somebody is wanting somebody who is codependent. Right. Correct. It's very dysfunctional. Very much so.

And some people just love it because it's their way. You need to examine yourself. And is that right? Like, it's not right. It's actually very dangerous spiritually speaking even with your kids like as they grow older it's like they can't let go of control and they want them to keep being a baby oh my gosh you know so true yeah and at some point you gotta like give them a chance right give them a chance even if they make a mistake they're gonna make a mistake rope i this

is what i do with my kids i give them enough rope where they feel like they have some sort of you know freedom and control right appears to me and then whenever i need to step in i yank it a little bit yeah and when we have a roof and we have a come to jesus right you get to have the conversation yeah under your roof you don't wait until they're 18 and then you're like, all right, well, good luck, figure it out. Right. Like when you keep treating like a baby the whole time. It's so true.

You know, I'm thinking of a person that tried to do this with their kids. They have like four kids. And they've literally gone through each of their kids because they wanted to control their children. Most of them are male. And so it definitely didn't work on the male children. In fact, major rejection, harsh rejection, and it wants nothing to do with these people or specifically one of the parents is a major, major control freak and loves being depended upon so that they can control the nature and the decisions of these kids.

Now, these kids are in their 20s, almost 30s, actually think and they're still trying to do it. Yep. Yep. Well, you're going to have nothing. You'll have no relationship. Right. Right. It shifts to manipulation. You can't control them have nothing. You'll have no relationship. Right. Right. It shifts to manipulation. You can't control them physically anymore. So there's no influence. They don't want to hear your opinion. So now you're trying to manipulate. I can't believe you're not coming

to my house for Christmas anymore. And you use words as a weapon. Yes. Or money. Because a lot of times people are using money to kind of manipulate. It's very toxic behavior. It makes me so sad because I'm like, there's a better way. There's such a better way. You know, like it doesn't have to look like this. But it's almost like they don't see it. There's a level of delusion there. Yeah.

And they go through, normally these same people go through friends like water. True. Yes. They all. Because they can't control their friends. Like they can control their kids. The moment they can't control you, they they can control the moment they can't control you they're they're done with you they're gone they like totally wipe you off the mat bye-bye

yikes that is and it and and they look so nice and people think that they're so nice oh my gosh this is so true this is so i'm. I can think of so many people right now in my head. Yes. Either in marriages that are like this or have kids like this. And they're all the same. Yes. They never have friends. Right.

And it's because. If they do, they go through them like this. Yeah. And it's because they lack a relationship with God. Because if you are bored with your walk with the Lord, then you are going to do other things to kind of satisfy that. Or if they do have one with the Lord, it's so immature. Yeah. Right.

Or if they do have one, it's like barely hanging on with a string and they think it's so much better than what it really is. Right. hanging on with a string and they think it's so much better than what it really is right and it's like you're one step away from like because because in order to manipulate and to control other people a lot of times there's deception that's involved in that um other sins that there's jealousy that's involved there's other lists of sins if you do these things you're not inherent to the kingdom of heaven there's envy involved all involved. There's other lists of sins. If you do these things, you'll not inherit the kingdom of heaven. There's envy involved. All of these things to control other people,

there's other sins involved. And eventually, that's just your life. That's how you live. Well, if you live like this, you'll not inherit the kingdom of heaven. So you can't have all of these sins operating in your life as a part of your life. Struggling is one thing,

but eventually you're not safe. Yeah, scary. It's frightening. Scary. All so that you can either be controlled or control. All for, oh yeah. For a yucky, yucky. Relationship.

Relationship, yes. You just, the people who are codependent or want somebody codependent you just don't understand how happy you would be free from all of that yeah so challenge try it try the opposite if you're relating to this yeah do the opposite go ahead yeah if you're relating to this exactly do the opposite just for like try it for like two weeks. Just do the opposite. If you always beg your husband for like the attention and needing and do the opposite.

Serve. Serve him. Show up and take the trash out. You know, do something that you would always be like, oh, I can't take the trash out because I need my, whatever, whatever it looks like. Pay a bill. Like do something and have some level of independence and watch what happens. And if you're

someone that coat it that's the enabler of it don't enable it yeah like sometimes you don't have to be on the phone like or calling each other a hundred times a day true you don't need to be texting all the time either because why what's What's the why behind it? Why are you doing this? Because there's no trust. Yeah. And you want to know what's going on with that person the whole entire time. Because if they're doing something or if there's something that just doesn't sit right with you, then you want to be able to stop that behavior. And sometimes if it's like, I've had friends that, and I run from these people. I, back in the day, I've had friends who didn I run from these people I have back in the day I've had friends who didn't want me to have other friends I'm they only wanted me and so what they would I didn't know that and it originally but so they would call me

like if I this is before cell phone so you know you back in the day you'd not be home you'd be out they'd be calling and calling mom come home and they're like your your friend terry called you about five times i'm like what what you call them up and like where were you you i was with this why didn't you tell me i would have gone or don't go with them go with me it's because you're not allowed to have other friends no thank you because they want to be the only person in your life. And that's a controlling thing. And I've had friends try and make it be I was only friends with them.

And they would get mad at me if I was friends with other people. That's exhausting. It is. And you know what I say to that? Run. Run for your life. It's not healthy. No. Because you are filling a void within, they have a void somewhere and you, they're trying to fill that void. They'll

suck you right into that void. With that friendship or with that marriage or whatever it is, that child. Yeah. And we, that hole is always meant to be filled with Jesus. Yeah. Always. We have a Jesus hole. Fill that sucker. Let's, let's fill it with Jesus. Okay. Yeah. A lot of times, you know, in some marriages, like their spouse is their Holy Spirit is their Jesus. And it's like, nope, that was never their role. Right. And you'll be so dissatisfied. And they do become dissatisfied with that person. Because there's no way they will rise to the occasion of being God. It's not possible.

No. And God won't allow it. God will be like, I'm not going to give you anything to say now. He is a jealous God. He is. He'll have no other gods before him.

Right. Yep. Even your husband. Yep. Even your wife. Yep. It's not going to happen. I say it all the time.

Jeff is a great husband, but he makes a lousy savior. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And I love him so much. But, like, at the end of the day, like, my relationship with God, you know, has to be strong. First and foremost. So that I can be the wife and the mom that my husband and my children need me to be.

Yeah. I'll be honest with you. I'll be honest with you. I'll be honest with you. I literally, I don't even know how much I talk to God. From the moment I put my foot, I didn't even get out of bed and I was already praying and talking to the Lord. I don't think, if I talk to Tom as much as I talk to God,

he'd have divorced me a long time ago. Literally. He can't handle it. Yeah, no. long time ago literally he can't handle it yeah no too many words he can't handle it no and i personally don't want to talk to him as much as i talk to god i love him i think he's great but after a while he's just not going to do it for me yeah like it's not the same it's not the same not even close i don't even want to talk to tom as much as i talk to god and tell got him i don't i don't want to tell tom everything i tell god right i just don't right right first of all tom would probably be like why are you even talking to me about this go tell god like hope come on come on wrap it up come on yeah he's not any words he's not an enabler when the plane oh 100 but he's gonna be needing me on that plane yes he will

a little codependent on the plane i'm gonna say about that he He's sitting with Tommy on purpose. Oh. Yeah, I can't handle it. That's so funny. I pray for him from afar. Okay. I'm usually laughing at him. Tommy's like, why do I always get stuck with the big guy? I'm like, first of all, you're thin.

Second of all, you and him are going to be watching the Super Bowl. Why is his kryptonite? Yes. They talk. They talk nonstop. Yeah, they'll be fine. They're two peas in a pod. Listen, I can promise you. Tom would rather be sitting next to Tommy than me.

Yeah. I'm going to ask him on the plane. I don't know what it is about flying. As soon as I'm on the plane and I'm like seated in my seat, I'm out. I'm asleep. I wish. Not me. I don't know if it's the sounds and the rocking.

I don't know. The white noise. I'm literally asleep the whole time. Not me. Not surprised. Not me I don't know if it's the sounds And the rocking I don't know The white noise I'm literally asleep The whole time Not me Not surprised Not me at all But I do hear it When that

That cart comes by You do hear it When that black hawk Comes And my drink Comes flying up And taking out the bottom Of the plane

Going to see Jesus Sorry No you heard the snack cart Yeah I know When my snack cart comes by Yeah you wake up for that I wake up I perk know when my snack cart comes by yeah you wake up i wake up perk up get my snack my little drinky and then i go back to sleep that's funny yeah the good thing about it is is i'm sure there'll be no suicidal black hawk pilot

i'm pretty sure that's what happened yeah you. You know what? I'm pretty sure of it, which totally, but there's a reason why we're not hearing anything just yet. Yeah. They're there before they make any statements. They're going to make sure of it, but I'm pretty sure there is no way. There's more to the story. I got a couple of conspiracies. Yes.

That you've heard or are you going on in your mind? No, I heard. Okay. Lay them on me. I believe those far less than what you think in your mind. Okay. What?

No, I'd rather, I trust your mind way more than conspiracy theories. Oh, okay, thank you. I was like, yeah, oh, come on. No, no, no. Your mind's brilliant, so I trust it way more than that. Thank you. So the conspiracies out there are that it got hacked and taken over and used as a drone. That's one of the conspiracies. there are that it got hacked and taken over and used as a drone.

That's one of the conspiracies. I thought that. Yeah. The other one is that she was looking at the one that was coming up and marked that one and didn't see the one coming down. So she said, yes, I see this. And so she missed the one that was here. Okay.

But the problem with that is conspiracy oh yeah the problem with that is is that the top of the black hawk is completely open so there's no way she could not have seen up above i agree left i agree even if she was seeing this over here i agree yeah because that thing was way closer and and the Blackhawk glass is right here. You can see the whole entire ceiling, front, and even bottom. Yes. They have a term for it. It's called target fixation.

Which is like that night vision. They have a target, and they fixate on that target, and they miss the others. But here's the problem there were there was another pilot in the cockpit oh yeah so how did he miss it yeah don't buy it yes and then you had the other guy back there too somebody saw that they and they went up and the plane tried to go up as well yeah yeah and it's clear there's one thing thing that CNN got that they shouldn't gotten from the air, some of the airport employees that have now been fired.

Right. And it clearly shows the black Hawk going up. Like it's aiming for it. Yeah. It should have never been that high. Yeah. So the drone thing makes sense. She was 500,

only had 500 hours or something like that. And like, that makes it appear that she was 500, only had 500 hours or something like that, like that makes it appear that she wasn't as good. Like she could easily have made this mistake. Like that's, it's an easy write-off that she, she wasn't, you know, professional enough. She didn't have enough experience. So if they hacked it and droned it into the plane, like that makes sense to me. Well, she's definitely, she was a biding person right we all know that yeah yeah she was a liberal the other thing is is they have no after a certain time there's they're talking to the black hawk nobody's responding no responses they went from talking

to not talking back and yeah god and my other theory is and i told tom this and tom's like tommy tom was kind of like that that's really off the deep end but i mean i mean about anything but i mean if you look back at the film i said to tom i said if you look back at that film with that gun from jfk where that show that chauffeur turns around and you clearly see him shoot JFK right in the head. Yep. Twice. Yep. He shoots twice. It's like you can't even undo what your eyes see.

Right. It's obvious that that chauffeur shot him, that Secret Service chauffeur. Who's to say she didn't do the same thing? Mm-hmm. Kill both of them and then Tom's like, well, I they did it with jfk right like i was like i was about to bust your chops but you know what yeah anything like anything could happen now he's like who knows who i know i said she didn't reply nobody's come for sating not speaking back right right and why is that yeah and we're the most unserious generation oh yeah because immediately after people were like this would never happen on spirit or on friends here

frontier and spirit just got caught it's true uh i don't know how recently it was for asking questions about sex, age. When you have to, when you go and before you can get your, no, Tom Cotton just did a major thing with two, a Spirit and a Frontier head of whatever. One of the things is before you can get the flight cost, when you're going and looking for a flight before it gives you any of your what what your options are as far as price go they ask you your sex your age nationality and something else four questions and he said why is that is that so you guys can

figure out what price to charge people? They're like, no, no, we've been doing this since 2014. It's like, it's irrelevant how long you've been doing it. Like, oh, Expedia Hotel. What are you doing that? You're doing it right now? Oh, sorry. No, no, no, you can do that. Well, so they tried to avoid it. And they were like, everybody, or that's just the way it is, is what they said. Delta doesn't do it. United Airlines doesn't do it. Why are you doing it? Yeah. And they did not deny it's for pricing.

Wow. That's weird. So, and their seats are horrible. Oh, yes. I won't fly them. I'm not flying Spirit. I'm not flying Frontier. They're terrible.

Now that we've talked all about that and not about codependency. It's okay. But the whole thing is not good. So I will say this. There's nothing wrong with depending on other people unless it becomes unhealthy. And when it becomes unhealthy,

that's when we don't do it anymore. Our dependency is God and God alone. In Matthew 18, three, it says, and this is Jesus talking, surely I say to you, unless you are converted and become as a little child or little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.

Children rely on their parents, right? But they're not like, we have a dependency on our parents, and we rely on them for everything. And what Jesus is saying in Matthew is, I want you to be like children. That means you rely on me like a child relies on its parent for everything. And that's what the Word of God tells us. He is to be our all in all.

There's no one else, no one more important. And when we put, again, like Tracy was saying, when we put our parents in a position where we rely on them and we're dependent on them and parents only want their children to rely on them and depend on them, now you're taking God's place. Because the word is very clear that Jesus said for us to be like little children. And that's how we get into

heaven. So our job is to rely on him and solely. And in Psalms 18 too, it says, the Lord is my rock and my fortress, my deliverer, my God, my strength, and whom I will trust, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. So we should have complete reliance on in God, 100% in every single thing. If you rely on anyone else, make sure that God is here and they're here. And there is a big separation. So a lot of times people rely on their job to make sure that their bills are paid. That's wrong thinking. No, you rely on God who has said he is your provider,

and he'll make sure that all your bills are paid. But there are certain things that you must do, and one of those things is pay tithe. And he is your provider. And so if you rely on yourself, which is if you say, I rely on my job, but that's relying on yourself and not on God. All these things, every walk in life, everything that you do should have reliance on God. Romans 15, 13 says, Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing

that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. We are so warned against being dependent on people. Jeremiah 17, 5-8 says, thus says the Lord, cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength. Do you understand that? I mean, that right there is so, like, if you are a person that wants your spouse to be so reliant on you, or if you're a spouse that wants to rely on your spouse for everything, you're wrong. You are out of alignment with the Word of God.

Cursed. You are cursed. People don't understand. Why is this happening to me? You're out of alignment with the word of God. Cursed. You are cursed. People don't understand. Why is this happening to me? You're out of alignment. You're not in the will of God. You're doing things your way, not his way. So those bring upon curses.

Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart departs from the Lord. For he shall be like a shrub in the desert and shall not see when good comes, But get this. in the Lord and whose hope is in the Lord. For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters, which spreads out its roots by the river and will not fear when heat comes, but its leaf will be green and will not be anxious in the year of drought, nor will cease from yielding fruit. That is such a strong warning. That is such a strong warning to make sure that your perspective on how your perspective on how your relationship with the Lord and how that aligns up, biblically speaking, is right on the straight and narrow. If it's not, you are out of order. And personally speaking,

I wouldn't want to be out of order, especially in today's ages. Plus, your kids, they watch you. This will trickle down unless they're smart enough to know that you were dumb as a box of rocks and you were out of order. I mean, and that doesn't happen a lot. Your kids will follow suit, which means when you have a strong alliance, or excuse me, strong reliance on God, these are the things that it creates.

Peace of mind, strength, guidance, hope, and assurance. Amen. That right there, peace of mind, strength, guidance, and hope and assurance, that right there is a successful life. That's how I want to be. Because all of those things, those four things in my life, like what can you not go up against? Or what can you not deal with?

Or, you know, in general, like peace of mind. Life is good. With a mind that is peaceful a mind will be in perfect peace to state a man will be in perfect peace whose mind is standing upon thee because he trust trusteth in thee which is isaiah 26 4 i believe so you keep your mind on him which is reliance on god peace i'd like for me like people don't walk in peace anymore. No. They're living in such turmoil and anxiety and anxiousness. Panic attacks are like, look, can you look this up for me? What is the level of anxiety from 1970 to present age?

Because I think people are gonna be, I think it's gonna be staggering for people to realize, but dependence on God eliminates any kind of anxiety, any kind of turmoil, inner turmoil. You cannot, if you're depending on God, there is no way that you can be an anxious person, that you can be distraught, that you can be depressed, that you can even be poor when your dependence is on him.

Because that means you're doing everything biblically speaking that the word says, and then there's just blessings and promises that follow that. It's not possible. Proverbs 3, 5 through 6, you keep looking when I do that. It says, trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. We all know this scripture. And in all your ways, acknowledge him for he shall direct your paths. That's Psalms 23, or excuse me, that was Proverbs i think it is hold on proverbs 3 5 through 6 but psalms 23 i think this is the last one and then we'll do the sponsors but hold on it's not we're

gonna keep continue oh she only printed out she didn't even print out the whole thing because the paper must have ran out we'll continue on with this on Monday. I mean, excuse me on, um, no, we won't. We'll continue on it after this. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I have a new thing right here. Just a reminder guys, no podcast on Wednesday. Don't forget. Yeah. No podcast on Wednesday. We get back on Wednesday, but we'll have a Valentine's day one on Thursday. Yes. Oh my gosh. I can't even do my, I can't even do my sponsor. Sorry, my sponsors, but I'm faithful in doing that because it's not on here.

It didn't print out all the way. Let me just read you Psalm 23. And maybe we'll just close out on the codependency because we talked about it a lot. There is absolutely no way you can be codependent or wanting to have somebody be codependent for you. You cannot be high maintenance. You cannot be demanding.

You cannot be control freak. None of that if you're living by Psalm 23. And everybody knows Psalm 23, and here comes Talia with the rest of it. Oh, my gosh. You're such a good girl. I know. I'm such a sweet little girly girl.

Such a good girl. I know, I'm such a sweet little girly girl. Such a good girl. What is that? No, sweetie, sometimes it stops. It's not you. It's not you. It does it to me all the time, but I will be able to do my sponsors really quick. Psalm 23 says,

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside the still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in the paths of righteousness for his namesake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. For you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil. My cup runs over. There's absolutely no way. If you're the person that wants somebody to be codependent on you, you can't live like Psalm 23 and want people to rely that heavily on you so that you feel like you have worth. Okay, that's a demented, distorted way of having value. The Lord, Psalm 23, if you let the Lord be all those things in your life, you won't want to have people relying on you in that way. You'll want to be free from all of that. And if you are a person that likes people to cater to you and control you, or you have control over them, you are very carnal and twisted in your thought process. I would say that you might be somebody who battles depression.

You're extremely anxious and you're very fearful because a lot of those things, anxiety and depression, stem from fear. And if you like being dependent on, your thing is fear as well, but your fear is having no worth. Psalm 23 gives you all the worth. Yes. Who would do all of those things for you? Who wants to be all those things for you

so that you don't have to worry about life and the day-to-days? Only the Lord. So if he's willing to let you be his focus, then you need to be willing to let him be your focus. Nobody else deserves that at all. What were you going to tell me? You got something for me. I know that. Yeah, it looks like, obviously, there's a huge increase, so she's going to give you one. I know. I know there's one because I've seen it. It suggests that around two to 5% of the US population may have had diagnosable anxiety in 1970. Compared to today, it's about 20 to 30% of people. And in 2018, an APA study found that 77% of Gen Z reported significant anxiety about their future compared to older generations.

And most of it is due to social media and technology is where the rise happened. Around 2010, they noticed a huge increase around 2010. Yep. Now when I've ever done any research on this social media and this thing right here has destroyed people and caused major anxiety in their life. Instant access. We never used to have that. No, if you think about wars back in the day, you wouldn't find out about different things until weeks later right right now everything is instantaneous yeah even seeing that black hawk going into the water along with that plane if people don't think seeing that having a visual um a visual of that doesn't do something to them

we're not supposed to see those things we're not supposed to dwell on those things. And as small children trying to like rationalize that without having some kind of, oh my gosh, if could that happen to me when I get on a plane? You don't think that that's going to happen? It is going to happen. There is nothing good that comes from instant news or instant information, nothing ever. And then you add the fact that people are scrolling continuously and their endorphins, isn't that what it's called, the endorphins? Dopamine. Dopamine, that's it. Like the dopamine that that causes.

It's like a drug. It's a drug. So you're always like this, which is anxiousness. Yep. And people used to get dopamine hits from, they said, doing longer tasks. So you have to work really hard, and then you finish that task, and you get a hit of dopamine. Now it's like instant dopamine. You get it so fast that it's burning people out because they're like, dopamine hit, dopamine hit, dopamine hit.

But they don't want to do hard things. It's like, was it you? Somebody was telling me about these little kids that are watching this one particular show. Oh, Cocoa Melon? Yeah, that was Natalie. Natalie with the Cocoa Melon. Yep. And they're pitching it because they can't watch it.

Yeah. People, if you don't think, that is like, I'm not saying that your kids are being demonically possessed by that. Right. Okay? Right. Come on. What I am saying, if you don't think

the devil's using that though to destroy them mentally, he is. It's a monkey on their back. It's an oppression. You don't think it, I mean, anxiety is an oppression.

It's not a possession. It's an oppression. And those spirits of oppression can be as damaging as a spirit, a demonic spirit, possessing you. They can be. People don't think it, but it's true. And can you be a Christian and be oppressed?

Yeah, you can. Can you be a Christian possessed? No, you can't. And you can say, well, what's the the difference there's a big daggum difference oh yeah there is yeah but it is true it's true and people are allowing their kids to just sit because then they don't have to deal with them right babysitter scroll scroll scroll you are doing much damage to your children don't have a kid if you can't be a parent don't do it because the rest of us don't want to deal with your

kid as an adult in society you're gonna end up like this girl oh my gosh because you're too streetwise yep and all these hoes laughing like something funny. She's talking about the audience that they're laughing at her. Did you say the hoes are laughing? Yup. So the audience are a bunch of hoes. Yup. Catch me outside. How about that?

Huh? Catch me outside. How about that? Catch you outside? What does that? Huh? Catch me outside. How about that? Catch you outside? What does that mean? What I just said. Catch her outside, and she'll go outside and do what she has to do. She's 13.

Yes. Yeah. So that's our friend. Catch me outside. How about that? Catch me outside. Oh, you follow her? Good.

Okay. All right. Hey, girl. oh you said she's way better now okay all right hey girl you did it maybe she's 13 well 13 years of age you're an idiot even though you don't realize it i know hopefully that's good though tal thanks for telling us that she's better that was a long time ago yeah well i'm sitting here going what the heck i think i was also 13 i I think I was. I was 13, but I was not like that. I became that at 19, 20, 21, 22. Not even 18. I wasn't even like that. 21, 22.

Catch me outside. How about that? With your hoops? Yes. That was me. Yes. And that's stupid someone said

I think she went back on the show better let's see okay oh my god good girl holy crap what a good follow up

I have goosebumps I have goosebumps I love redemption I do too me too I love redemption so much I wonder if she found Jesus

she did it was totally Jesus or maybe her frontal lobe developed. Who knows? It could have been that simple. I always say that, especially about teenagers. Their frontal lobe just hasn't developed yet. Exactly.

And it is true. It is true. It hasn't. It is true. I had to learn that from my husband. That's decision making. That's where you do a lot of your decision making. And their brain's literally reorganizing.

It's like, ah. Right. And their brain's literally reorganizing. Like it's like, ah. Right. And they just, they become like egocentric again. Love and grace for teens. That's how I'm like our little babies. They are. They're just babies. Yeah, but even still, like I look at like, now Tommy has like come around, right?

He's 26. And like he is a whole different person from when he was 21, 22. And I look at Norma. That's why I'm not a big proponent of people getting married before 25, because I just, you're not, you don't really know who you're going to be. You're becoming, you're coming about and the things that you think are so important or the things that you think you are right now, you're not going to be that. And so having to grow together with another person and all that going on, a lot of times you don't even know how to communicate. True. So like having to communicate with somebody you're now married to and you don't know how to do it.

I mean, it's tough. It is tough. It's tough. Spoken from someone who got married at 22. It's tough. Yeah. And so for me, I'm like, why don't you just, I'm not saying you have to wait till you're 25. I'm just saying, wait until you're a little bit older and you realize you you don't know everything like even norma

she's 20 is she 23 or 24 she's 24 24 she just turned 24 but just like even recently i've heard norma say i don't know anything like i know nothing but before that it's not like you couldn't tell her anything it's just more or less like norma was like I agree with you, but I don't agree with you. Right. Like I see what you say, but, but now she's like, I don't know anything. Like I know that I don't know how to communicate very well. Yeah. That's like, that's a start. That's a start. That's a start because I was the same way. Like you couldn't tell me nothing. And then I realized at 25, you're an idiot. You don't know anything. God bless you. Your lobe was closed. Yeah. And as you get closer to that 25, you just, I'm saying 20, 23, 24, mainly 24. That's when you really should say, okay, I think I could

really get married. I probably would have a successful marriage. And, you know, there's maturity behind all of that. True. Because what you think you know, and you want at 18, and 19, and 20 is not the same. Unless God tells you, like, I've known a girl, she was 16 years old, she told me God told her that the man she was going to marry, she pointed him out and said, God told me I was going to marry him. And I was like, you're 16. I'm not saying I doubt you, but I doubt you. But she ended up marrying him when she was 18 years old. They have a successful marriage.

Both of them heard the Lord. Both of them knew God told them to marry each other. Do I say, then it works? Yeah, I do say, then it works. Because God put you two together. He told both of you, why wait? You'll figure it out. But before then, no, I'm not. Unless God tells you, don't do it.

Right, and especially if you're with the person that God handpicked for you. I think that made a huge difference. Because I was 22, and I was very young. Oh, that's true, yep um but you knew I knew and then Jeff also because he was a little older than me a lot older than me um he helped me a lot and just kind of like we're it's okay it's gonna be all right yeah um I know we're going through a little hiccup right now but just so you know it's gonna be all right um Yeah. I know we're going through a little hiccup right now, but just so you know, it's going to be all right. He's like, I was homeless at one point. We'll make it through.

Yeah. If you can do that, if you can get through that, you can get through almost anything. Yeah, absolutely. So perspective on things. Big picture. Yep. And age really does help keeping that perspective. Yes. Let's do this really quick. Our sponsors is Real Estate Appraisal Associates of Southwest Florida is owned by Lord Keller. They've been in business since 2005 and have provided the most accurate certified home appraisal service in the Southwest Florida. They have upfront pricing with no hidden fees.

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Hanson's Automotive Services has been in business since 2017 with 20 years experience. They do everything from oil changes to tires to AC work to engine repair and replacement. They're not just motivated to do their best. They are automotivated. Their business lives up to Proverbs 16, 3. Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans. So funny, I was in his, I was there again this morning, 941-460-3962. 941-460-3962. Yeah, I got to spend a little bit more time with Nick today. The funny thing is I'm in there, and I'm just minding my own business,

and he's talking to this lady, and this lady ends up coming in because he's still outside looking at her car, and she says to me, she's like, he is the most honest person I've ever worked with as far as with a garage or a mechanic. She's like, there's nobody like him. And I said, I agree with you, absolutely.

She had no idea I was his friend. Yeah, I know. She found out later because he dimed me out. But that's somebody that doesn't even know you and is going to tell you about that. He is. And that woman was elderly. She was 67 years old.

And listen, it's a scary thing to take your car to a garage when you're a woman and you're older or if you're a guy and you don't know squat because they can lie to you

but not Nick so give him a call he'll take great care of you thank you so much for joining us today we really appreciate it I'm 20 minutes over so I apologize

I got a little distracted what's new we'll see you on sunday and then we'll see you on friday because we got a good plan we're going to put some stuff while we're in vegas we're going to put some stuff out for you so be watching for that it's going to be fun thank you so much for joining us see you on sunday and And be blessed in Jesus' mighty name. Bye.