The Hope Hotline - Should I Call Her Out?! My Ex is Friends with His Ex?

Episode Date: May 14, 2025

Should I Call Her Out?! My Ex is Friends with His Ex?

Real talk. Real talk. Real talk. Real talk. Hello and welcome to the whole pot line. That's a visual. I just told them of something naughty that I used to do before the podcast started.

In the club. In the club. In the club. That's right. We all fam. Oh my gosh. What? Something's gonna make me go something like this

up in here, up in here. Oh. I don't know what that song was. Okay. Up in here. But how did that go at the beginning? Yeah. I'm gonna lose my mind.

You're gonna make me lose my mind. Yeah. Up in here. Not when you're a believer, you don't lose your mind. Oh, God. All right, Ms. Barrettall. I wanna roll, ask Kelly. Oh my gosh.

Hello, all of our friends and loved ones on social media and on TikTok. Hello. Thank you. Welcome. Welcome to the whole pot line. Thank you for joining in with us today. All of you guys that have broken the force field of Facebook and YouTube.

Yeah. If you get through that force field. Congratulations. Listen, she get a prize. Yeah, like you're mighty. You are. You are mighty. Exactly get a prize. Yeah, like you're mighty. You are. You are mighty. Exactly.

Dear Lord. Like I was talking to somebody. Oh, I was talking to Adalice's assistant, Olivia yesterday. And I was telling her like, you can't even get through on Facebook. Like she's like, yeah, we've had to battle that. I'm like, yeah, but we've been suspended. She's like, oh. Oh. Oh had to battle that. I'm like, yeah, but we've been suspended.

She's like, oh. Oh. Couple times. True, true. Just a few. Couple times. Yeah. They got us blocked bad.

So if you're with us on those platforms, welcome. And then Rumble has changed its algorithm. So we're batting a thousand right now, people. I know. We're doing okay on shorts on YouTube. Somehow, some way. They're getting through. But.

Whatever. I know. It is. I know, I know. We're in it for you guys. Yep, we are. At the end of the day, we're in it for you. Yep.

So, okay, so for everybody that didn't go to Pittsburgh, it's not that you weren't invited. True. Cause I really didn't have much to do with who went to the Pittsburgh, I'll be honest with you. It's the people who went before, they all were like, Hey, I wanna go back. So if you want to go to Pittsburgh,

you are welcome to go. You can invite yourself. And there are a ton of different hotels that are walking distance to- You guys stayed in one hotel. I brought my girls. You brought your girls. Vanessa brought Yeah. I brought my girls. You brought your girls? Vanessa brought her girl and then my girls.

Which are her girls. And then we did do a house, but that was basically me and Heather, but people who couldn't normally, or well, they could afford it to gone, but some people couldn't. That's an that's an expensive trip yeah yeah yeah so people who could afford the flight but might not have been able to afford the place well we did have a house so that made it easier but I can't promise you that's

gonna be the case next year because I don't know but But if you wanna go, go. Like we're not, don't let anything stop you or get in the way of going to this thing. And like a lot of times people just like Vanessa just said, hey, I'm gonna get a room. And then people said, can I go with you? Yeah. And then we split it. There you go.

Which saves the money. Yep. So do that. Like get a group of your friends together and find out who wants to go and then do that. Cause I don't know how I'm gonna do it next year. I can't, I can't. I never know.

I know I have to go next year cause of some things that might happen next year, but not involving me at all. Let me just make that abundantly clear. It's not me, but we probably are going back next year because they want us to go back. And I probably will always go back just out of pure loyalty unless I feel like the Lord's telling me just not that year. But like last year, I knew I wasn't supposed to go.

But it had nothing to do with, it had nothing to do with the conference. It had everything to do with being home and waging war for actually the church. So, but like I'll probably always go. I don't know what that'll look like, but you can always hang out with me. Unless you annoy the crap out of me,

then you're not hanging out. But she will not let you hang out with her. If I say no to you, there might be a not good reason for that. Oh my gosh. Or a good reason. But that's okay. As at my Lee Ann Morgan, who I love, says, if you don't get invited,

it's because you're not cool. Oh no, she goes, you're not fun. That's the reason why. You're not fun. Yeah. So, but yeah, always like the more the merrier. What was great and I can't promise you this, that'll happen this year, but what was great is they just blessed our socks off.

They like saved our whole group. There were so many of us that they saved like two rows for our church up in the front. There's like a thousand people there. Yes, and doors open like an hour before the event. Right. We didn't get there that early. No, they had, cause we had seats.

Praise you Jesus. Yeah, but yeah had seats. Praise you Jesus. I know. But yeah, I mean, they were just beautiful to us. Yeah, they're great. Oh my gosh. Always are. And you got to lay hands one night with Adalys. That was so cool.

That was so sweet. Holy mackerel. She invited you up. That was awesome. Yeah, Heather's like, I'm like, Heather, you're gonna have to take my stuff. She's like, like, did you, cause she's, you know, she's like, please tell me with this stuff. I'm like, did you know that was have to take my stuff. She's like, like, did you? Cause she's, you know, she's like,

please tell me with this stuff. I'm like, did you know that was happening? Like not being mean about it, but did you know that? And you didn't tell me. I'm like, I had no idea. I know, I could tell she was just like, in the moment. Yeah, it was in the moment.

Yeah. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, super sweet. It was a great, great time. Yeah. Very exhausted afterwards. Yeah, I feel like I'm still recovering. Of course you do. You guys took that early flight.

That's tough. Like that late night and then get up at the crack of dawn. Three hours worth of sleep. Yeah, that's always- That was rough. That makes recovery a little bit harder. Yeah, it did. And then we had to rip and run and get ready for church.

Right. All of us, except for Vanessa. Vanessa got to go home to her family, but the rest of us were running around and I'm calling Vanessa and making her work from her house with me. Like, hey Vanessa. So did you really get off?

No. Making her work from her house. But yeah, Vanessa is really the only one I think, cause you stayed and then we all had jobs cause we all had to come back and work. But listen, Vanessa needs more sleep than the rest of us. Cause you get up at eight. No, you don't.

That's not true. No, you get, you go to bed at eight. Now that's a lie because you go, you get up way earlier than everybody else. You go to, it's basically the same amount of time. Yeah. It's not really. We average the same amount of time. Yeah, yeah. It's not really. We average the same amount of time.

Yes. Yes, absolutely. I take that back. That's a lie. Oh, thank you. That's not cool. That's not cool. Yeah, so.

It just looks different. Yeah. But it was a long day. Saturday was a long day. Yes, ma'am. Sorry. Shut up. I didn't even nap. Oh, that's rough. I did not know.

Yeah, that's rough. Sorry about that. I didn't either until late at night. And then I was like, I'm going back to bed. Yeah. Yeah. But it was a great time. Do you have anything from it?

I do. I do. And just tell me when you want me to stop because I just took all their videos. Ah! So, and one of Talia's. Oh, cool. Oh, let's just do the eight day all the way through. Okay So, and one at alias. Oh cool. Oh, let's just do all the way through.

Okay, three minutes. That's nothing. Okay, so just tell me if you want. You are not the same person. They're not going back to the same place. After you meet Jesus, what encounter with his power changes everything. He washed me of my sin,

but now I'm transformed. Now I'm rewired to think the way he thinks to walk the way he walks to talk the way he talks she's a powerhouse she is okay look at that line into that line. It's the oil that breaks the yoke of heaviness coming to me all who are burdened and heavy laden and I will give you rest. You may have sown in tears but you're gonna reap in joy.

You may have walked through the valley of hardship, but you're coming into the best season that you've ever had And I'm telling you this is the year of the favor of God for your life This is the year of your healing. This is the year of your breakthrough This is the year of your advancement and no demon and hell can stop that which God has started. I downloaded these off Instagram. The word of God is your mirror. And before you begin anything, always take the time to take a closer look and allow it to reveal things that you may need to adjust. Amen.

Take a good hard look in the mirror of God's word at the new you that God has created. Take a good hard look at what the Word of God has already said about you. He tells you you can do all things to Christ that strengthens you. He tells you that you are the head and not the tail. You are above and not beneath.

You are blessed going in and blessed going out. My spirit lives within you. You are my sheep and you hear my voice. You know my voice. And the voice of the wicked one you will not follow. I mean, I like literally was so impressed with her. Yeah, I've never heard her speak before. I have, but I have not.

But never, and I don't think it's because she was right in front of me. I think it's because she was so in love. She's probably always good, but. This was breakfast in the Q&A podcast that happened afterwards. So there wasn't as many people in the room. There was only five of us. This is very special footage from our program. Way to go Tau.

The oldest is like staring at my camera. I'm scared. Way to go, Tao. go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go,, Cathy Deplantis, man. Yeah, good, so good. I like her voice a lot too. I wouldn't think that I would, but I really like it. She's like, I don't know how to, I don't know. Like there's no comparison because Adonica and her are very, very different in their styles. But man, they, you know, they're literally

five years older than me. Really? They're five years older than me. And I act classless, homeless. You're ridiculous. And like illiterate next to them. I won't let you do that. I'm just kidding.

Thank you. Well, no, no, I'm like, when I look at them, I'm like, what happened to me? No. You stay in your lane, Hope. Exactly. You stay in your lane. I'm like, oh my gosh.

Exactly. You bring it. Yep. Like they're like. I know. You look at them and go, man, I will never saying it. Yeah. I think they're, they're like, I know. You look at them and go, man, I will never be that. Do you know what's so funny that people look at you hope and say, man, I will never be like that.

True. They're probably thanking God. No, no, no, no. No, no, no. Thank God I will never be like that. I won't let you do that. I'm just kidding you. Oh my God. I mean, seriously, you look at them and like.

I know, it's impressive. Yeah. I'm a 12 year old little boy. I mean, I look at them. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like they are so. Wait, I have the last one. Oh, you do?

Way to go, girl. Okay, here we go. How do you balance everything? It's not about the balance. It's not about what I do with my time. It's the fact that I am transformed in the image of God. And every day I go after what he calls me to do in alignment with his purpose for my life.

Because the truth is, these are things that you don't choose. Our guidance counselors, they were trying to help us out. But they didn't know any better. Because you don't just pick and choose what you're called to do. You discover it. The Bible says that he preordained you before even you were in your mother's womb.

He called you. He fashioned you. He put something on and on the inside of you in your mother's womb. He called you, he fashioned you, he put something on the inside of you in your blood, in your DNA that would make you a standout, that would make you special, that would make you be an aid to humanity. Do you believe that? You know what? Oh, that's so good. You know what, you know, oh, that's so good.

You know what is so amazing, like with what she said, like when she made the comment of like, your guidance counselor can never help you with that. Right? Well, you can fill out as many forms as you want to. Maybe you guys didn't have this. My thing is driving me crazy. Back in the day, like when I went to school, which was like in the 80s, like I graduated 85, right?

So you may go for high school, you go into the counselor or you go into, they would have a class where you go and you fill out these, you fill out this questionnaire and that questionnaire, we kind of basically kind of tell you like where your strengths were. So maybe whatever job description or that you were gonna go for, it might lead you to where you might be really good at. Right?

Yeah. You don't even wanna know about it. Oh my gosh. I don't even think I had one. They were like, you got nothing. That'd be me was. I don't even think I had one. They were like, you got nothing. That'd be me too. I'm not kidding you. No way.

There had to be like sales or something. Like you had to have like. Well, if talking was a specialty, maybe, but like back in the day they didn't do, they didn't really have sales. Like it was more like doctor nurse. I mean, it was very limited in comparison to what it is today, right?

Like they didn't have ones for sales. Cause I mean, sales really wasn't like, okay. I mean, they didn't have like realtor and stuff. I don't know. But for me, there really wasn't the job descriptions that I had were like receptionist. Okay. Okay.

Okay, that's nothing. That's not really. Like a career. A career. Right. Like when I, I mean, I tell you the career, it definitely wasn't nursing. Right. Somebody would have died.

Right. But, ain't nobody living under me. Hope's like, you're fine. Rub some dirt in it. Yeah, rub some dirt on it and call it a day. Keep going. But what's so true about this is, is where the scripture says,

train up a child in the way that it should grow, in the way that it should go, and when it grows old, it will not depart from it. So when you, like, a lot of times, I was explaining this to a friend of mine one time, when they were trying to talk to me about their children. I've told a few people about this. I might even mention it here but that scripture is oftentimes and it is true for this but it wasn't specifically

for this. Most people believe that if you train up your child in the church in their spiritual walks when they grow old they'll not depart from it. That's not what that scripture means specifically. It actually specifically means it's something that what she was saying is accurate. A counselor, a school system, college is never going to do what really we as parents are supposed to do for our children. We're supposed to set our children up spiritually speaking to understand what their gifts and their callings are so they walk in them, then they won't depart from it.

If you teach your child what its gifts and callings are, they will stay in their walk with the Lord cultivating that. Based on what of that gift and calling is, is the job description that they should go out into the workforce and do. We do it different though. We find out what are you supposed to do as a college graduate?

What are you gonna, what are your studies gonna be? What are you going to specifically specialize in, right? What are you gonna get your degree in? And then we take that first and then secondary, if we even do it, we find out what God's gifts and callings are for us. That's not the word of God though. As parents, it's first your spiritual,

second the world. And that's not what we do. And if we did it, then most of our children would never walk away from the Lord because they'd be walking in their calling. You won't turn your back on your calling. But she's absolute. When she said that, I was like, that is so accurate.

So accurate and so powerful. But a lot of people don't, they don't put the two and two together a lot of times, cause I don't think they understand. I think they understood the surface level of what she was saying. I don't think they understood the deeper meaning of what she was saying.

Yeah. It's powerful. It goes all the way down to your children. So, all right, let's do the next thing. Okay. What do you wanna do? Well, let's just forego the sharers likes. And let's just like that.

Let's do like, what's Friday? Friday is, Carrie is coming in from the gym where Hope has changed her life. Dramatically. Dramatically. And so she will come in and we'll have a whole conversation with her about all the good stuff. So you won't wanna miss that. She has a great story too.

So, and then just real quickly, obviously Natalie comes in every month. So May 30th, she will be here too. So we got some guests coming on. Oh yeah. So that will be great. And I think those are the most important things. So what I would say, what would you say Vanessa?

I was gonna say, I'm gonna keep my personal stories to myself when Natalie's here. Why's that? It's always- The last time I talked about the butter knife. No, fisting. The butter knife. The butter knife.

Oh, the butter knife. Which came from- Which came from fisting. Never once did I ever do that. No. You did not fist, but you did butter knife. Which came from- Which came from fisting. Yeah. Never once did I ever do that. No. You did not fist, but you did butter knife. Brother Roger. Listen, I'm telling you, Vanessa,

when you tell those stories, first of all, that Instagram post, gold. The TikTok post? Gold, TikTok, gold. It was. The second of all, like, that makes me fall in love with you more and more. Oh my God.

When you tell those stories, I fall more and more in love with you more and more. When you tell those stories, I fall more and more in love with you. Are you kidding me? It's the best. I mean, people always, that's just why I'll never be a Cathy Deplantis or an Adonica Howard Brown. Cause they would never utter the word fisting

or butter knife. Okay. But I'm just saying. Yeah. Right. That's beautiful. Okay. That's some funny crap right there. Okay. I'll bring them.

Bring them, please. They would never encourage it. It's always good for the plot. They'd always be like, they'd be like, no, not me, man. Bring it. That's so funny. Bring it.

I love it. Yep. All right. All right. It's adorable. Okay, but I will say, don't skip Friday because you don't think, oh, this has got anything to offer me, I am telling you right now. I'm not just saying it to say it, but my life has been forever changed in ways that I never thought possible. I've always heard, do this and you'll feel better. but my life has been forever changed in like ways that I never thought possible.

I've always heard, do this and you'll feel great. Do that and you'll feel great. Okay, never has happened. I've never felt great. Okay, that's a load of hooey. Until I met Carrie and I'm telling you right now, like there is a wealth of knowledge and wisdom in seeking counsel from somebody who has the knowledge.

And like, if you are not satisfied for where you're at, I speak specifically in health, I speak in a dietary, I also am like physically, speak physically talking about as well. If you don't like any of that stuff about yourself, which I hated, but I just thought, first of all, I'm like, do I really wanna start this? I'm like 56 years old.

I mean, do I really wanna do this? And I was like, you know what? It's never too late to start. True. And I like to challenge myself. And you may not like to challenge yourself, which I totally get, but I'm telling you know what, it's never too late to start. True. And I like to challenge myself. And you may not like to challenge yourself, which I totally get, but I'm telling you right now, if you meet the right person,

and I'm not saying you gotta go to a gym, that's not what I'm saying at all, but there's always nuggets of truth that you can take to start the process of changing your life in a better way. And she is such a great person, such a wealth of knowledge, but you might be surprised. It's like when a Mags like literally challenged me, said just do it for what was it three months or three weeks?

Three months, yeah. Just do it for three months and you'll not turn around and go back. And she was 100% correct. And I have never, ever felt better in all of my life. Ever. This morning, I didn't even go to the gym, but she has it so that I can actually do a workout

from my own house. And still, like I'm sore right now. And it didn't take anything. I didn't have any weights. I had nothing. I know it's, she's just, so don't think it's too late. It's never too late. And especially for women who have gone through

post menopause, you really wanna attack this cause you really wanna be strong and like, like you don't wanna have to lift grocery bags and go, man, I must be getting weaker. No, you don't have to. And you don't have to be in the gym every single day, pumping iron and acting like a, you know, like a bodybuilder.

It just isn't like that. But lots of fun, you make friends. Like I, all my girls left me, as they're all alone, all by myself. I still kept going. Yes you did. Yes you did. And now, like when we go in there, I am with about four other women,

and besides the trainers, and we have such a great time when we laugh the whole entire time. So, a lot of people are lonely. Take that as an opportunity to get in shape and make friends. And listen, if you don't think I'm working on people, I am working on people.

Cause people need Jesus. Yes. It's open door. Exactly. So, all right, enough said. But tune in on Friday. Cause I promise you, I promise you, you will love her.

But second of all, she's gonna like, she's a real person, like genuinely great individual. All right. Yeah. What are we doing? And we're going now? Let's do this. Okay.

Listen, like what do we have going on on TikTok? What's going on on TikTok? She's a Christian, so she gets it. She gets it. Love you. What else? So we have it. Okay, that's good. Thanks so she gets it. She gets it. Love ya. What else? So we have it. Okay, that's good.

Thanks for those people watching. Okay, let's do this. First question is, do you have yours on? Not yet. I was going to ask Kelly, well, since we're live, Kelly, can you invite me to yours? Thank you. That'll up what's going on. That's why I was like, that's weird.

Okay, you can go help. Okay, the first question is, my friend keeps canceling plans last minute, but still posts on Instagram, hanging out with other people. Should I call her out or just let it go? I'll read that question one more time. Somebody on the opposite side of the room is saying let it go.

My friend keeps canceling plans last minute, but still posts on Instagram, hanging out with other people. Should I call her out or just let it go? Well, first of all, that's freaking hurtful. That's mean. But I always say, let's do both. I'm all for both. White fist, left fist. Let's go, let's go at it.

Yeah. Okay. So if somebody tells you they're gonna do something with you, but then they go off with somebody else, first of all, they're a liar. Second of all, they're not a person of their word. Both of them are scripturally inaccurate. Well, if this person's not a Christian, then forget about it. True. Doesn't really matter. They can do whatever the heck they want. Then you need to decide whether you wanna be friends

with somebody who's not going to be an honest, good friend. And kind of like, have you ever, you're like a placeholder, right? Like you're the backup. I dated somebody who treated me like the backup. That was my husband. Oh my God. I was the backup.

Truth. Broke up with me three times, two times, broke up with me to date other girls. And in between these two girls, while he was dating me, if he had a party to go to, if he had a wedding to go to, as the placeholder, as the backup. If he didn't have somebody else, it was me. Okay. Hope.

I know, it's true. It's true, ask him. I know, I've heard the stories. It's not good. That's why I said, I've heard the stories. It's not good. That's why I said, poop or get off the pot. Yeah. Okay. True.

Ultimatum. That's what you gotta do with people. True. Don't be a placeholder. Don't be the backup. I mean, who wants that for life? Right. I mean, it's okay a couple times, okay?

But once you learn that that's how it is, don't allow yourself to be used. Not good. So let's look at the Bible. The Bible is clear about lying in Proverbs 6, 16 through 19. This is the New King James verse. It says, these six things the Lord hates. Most people go, you shouldn't hate anything. Well, God does, so I will. And that's a fact. I don't hate people, but I do hate things. It says, these six things the Lord hates. Yes, seven are an abomination to him. A proud look, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devised wicked schemes, so that's a liar twice, feet that are swift in

running to evil, a false witness who speaks lies, liar again, and one who sows discord among brother, okay? That's another liar. And it says that he hates the man, actually, that lies. So he hates all of this. So if he hates it, I might not do it. So let's look at keeping it. And again, if this person isn't a Christian, okay, so what? Like you can't like enforce things on somebody that doesn't abide by the same roles. It's apples and oranges, right? You don't try and enforce Christian values on somebody who's not a Christian. That is the stupidest thing on the face of the earth. Understand who you're working with.

Okay, they're not gonna do it. So to make them apply, make them follow by the same rule that you do is insane. But if they do call themselves a Christian, they should be abiding by what the word says and they should be acting like a Christian acts, which is Christ-like. That's where Christian comes from. You are to be a little Jesus. You're supposed to be a Christ-like, right?

So Matthew 5.37 talks about keeping your word, which says, just say a simple yes, I will, or no, I won't. Anything beyond this is from the evil one. So let's say you say yes, but then you don't do it. You're not keeping your word and it says anything, if you don't do that, it's from the evil one. That's not good. Right.

That's not good. so what does that mean then if you let your yes be yes and your no be no for anything more than this is from the evil one what does that mean then what do you think that means girls I think it means that you keep your word whether it's yes or yes or no or no right but then it says for anything more than this is from the evil one. Yeah, because it's like the wishy washy thing where like when you like it's something like

what Pastor Thomas talked about being like whipped by the wind, whatever decision you go. Like if something- Being tossed to and fro. To and fro. Linda said in the thing, if you say you're going, go, even if a better option comes along.

So it's one of those things that if you said yes, or you said no, stick to those two things. Because, and listen, this happened to me one time, I'll finish that later, I'm going back to TikTok, trying to make the cover photo. But one time I had an opportunity to shoot a senior session and I was really excited about it. And the same day, a woman that gave me that first referral

gave me a second referral for a gay couple to shoot them. And I wasn't comfortable doing that. And so it was like, they were like celebrating their anniversary or something where it just didn't feel right. I had a conviction about doing it. So I said no to both because I didn't want to have to go and tell somebody that wasn't a believer why I wasn't willing to take photos of somebody.

And so for me, it was just better to say no to both of them. And even I love senior sessions, like my favorite. So it was really hard. And it was good money for both of them. And it would have been easy sessions. But for me, if I would have said yes to one and no to the other, and then I felt like I would have not explained truly

how I felt about it at the time. So- Let me ask you this. Yeah. On a whole different topic. Okay. Now, did you feel something about shooting the couple that was gay?

Did you feel weird about that because being a conviction or is it just them? Cause for me, I wouldn't have any problem in shooting a gay couple. Yeah, because of their relationship and celebrating them. And like, I think they were married. I think that's what it was at the time. I can't remember exactly,

but I just didn't feel right about it. And I don't think it's a sin. Sometimes you feel like I can't do this, but I can do that. Do you know what I'm saying? I mean, even though I say, yeah, I'm not kidding you. Like, I don't know if I would bake a cake for somebody, but I might bake a cake,

because for me it's an opportunity sometimes to say, I don't necessarily agree with this lifestyle, but you know what? And I'm not condoning it, but I'm not going to not, I'm not going to like be a turd. Yeah, it's- But it's not compromised,

because I would have to explain my- Right, right. I just, I felt convicted about celebrating two women in a marriage and that's what it was for, like taking photos to celebrate their anniversary. Yeah, I get that. Yeah, and so- But a taking photos to celebrate their anniversary. Yeah, I get that. Yeah, and so it really- But a lot of Christians feel like that.

Yeah, I know, I know. And I might feel like that for some, but not for all. Right, and so it really would be like the nuance of like if it was just them with their families and they were like on vacation and they wanted a family photo, I wouldn't feel convicted about that. Right. Like if there was like grandmas and uncles

and it was like this big, like that wouldn't bother me. But it was the fact that they were like celebrating something that I don't see as a true union. And it was very, I don't know. It just, yeah, when I got it, I immediately got a check in my spirit about it. And I wanted to justify it because I really wanted the senior session.

And I was like, does it really matter? But I was so convicted about it. And this was a little while ago too. So I don't know if anything's really changed for me, but it was. And I was really trying to lean into my convictions and make sure that I didn't do anything that would a little leaven.

Well, I will say, what makes sense about all of that, if I process and rationalize it through, because I never really thought about it until now, because I'm like, I probably, but here's the thing. I might do it for somebody that I have a close relationship with where I can speak into their life, but I might not do it for just anybody because then you don't get the opportunity.

And I wouldn't want them to think that I can don't. Because for me, it's like, I want to see them in heaven. So is it loving to embrace and endorse something that you know will send them to hell? I wouldn't wanna support that and help that. So I totally get your point on it. But I also am like, if I knew them very well, I'd be able to say, I'm not celebrating this,

but because of my love for our friendship, I will do it. But know this, this is how I feel, this is what I believe, and I'm concerned. Yeah. But you can't do that with people you don't know very well. Yeah, I know I do who these people were. Yeah.

And somebody who's close to you will receive that because they understand your heart. And that's one more chance for you to say, please don't do this. Right, right. But. True. And then you never have to worry about whether or not

you said it, but it's interesting. But I will say this, I'm like Linda and Linda, like I know for a fact, like the thing is, is sometimes better things do come along. And I've had to go to things when better things came along and I still stuck to what I said I was going to do, even though I didn't wanna do it. I've had to do a lot of things that I didn't wanna do.

But that's lots of us in life. Lots of us in life have to go to gatherings and parties and weddings and funerals and blah, blah, blah. We don't wanna go to them. But if we say we're gonna do it, then no matter what comes our way. But just recently something happened to me. I said I was gonna go to something,

but something tragic happened. And I had to say, I'm sorry, I can't go to your thing because I have to go administer with this person for a tragedy. Those are things that you do break. That's when it's okay to say, I'm gonna have to not keep my word. And then there's times like I agreed to go

on a podcast recently. And then Tom's like, you can't go on that podcast because we are obligated to go here and we didn't know it. Well, that's when I go and I say, hey, this is my situation. I don't want I'll reschedule with you I'm not but just now like I have no option in this. Okay those are things that you make except when there's no options it's not there's no dates that you can wiggle around with somebody else. I mean, most of the time, that's not what happens though.

Most of the time people break their word because their word means nothing. Yeah. And I love Tom because one of the things Tom never does, even with me, if I ask him, let's go and do something, he'll always say, we'll see, or I'm not promising you. I'll have to think about it. He has a whole bunch of different ways to say,

I'm not saying yes and I'm not saying no. Because he doesn't want to say he's going to do it. Cause as soon as he says he's doing it, we're doing it. Yeah. Right. I'm just saying to you girl, like if this person, is this is their lifestyle and they break their promises and then they ditch you, and that's what I don't like

is when people ditch people, it's mean. Yeah. To go in and hang out with, everybody, like in growing up, we all experienced it growing up. Like our friends would, you know, you have a whole bunch of friends and then two friends decide to do something else or the group decides to do and they ditch. It's hurtful. Yeah, it's mean. It does not feel good. You don't ditch people. No, friends

don't do that. And obviously this person's not your friend. So they're not honest. I say find a new friend. Yeah. And do you even want a friend like that? Right. Like know your worth girl. You're awesome. You have a lot to offer. 100%. You have to remember too, God always keeps his word. Yes. And that means that we do too. So when we say we're gonna do something and we don't do it, then our word diminishes. And people begin to doubt. Like for me, like when I say to somebody, like I'm believing for this or I'm gonna pray for you for this. Like if I had shown in my past not to be a person of my word with them, they probably wouldn't take what I'm standing on them with too strongly.

Will she really pray? She said she was gonna do that. She didn't do that. Yeah. You know, your word matters. Yeah. It does. And so it determines how much people believe in you and trust in you.

And it reveals, I made a list, if you keep your word, it reveals your integrity, your trustworthiness, how Christ-like you are. It is a big freaking deal to keep your word. And people think it's so light or take it so lightly, but you should not. You absolutely should not get away from them for show. What else?

Yeah. And if you don't keep your word, it reveals how Christ-like you are. It reveals all the things that you just listed out too. It's a good mirror. And how serious you are about it. Like if you're saying yes to something and then you don't do it, were you even like,

especially if you're like asking for help or anything like that, then I'll like, somebody gives you something to do and then you don't do it. Like, were you even like, was it for attention? Was it that victim mentality? Like, what was the purpose of it? Oh yeah.

You know, so if you're that type of person too, like take inventory, like, why do I keep asking for help or why do I keep going to people and then they tell me what to do and then I never do it or it's rare that I do it. Just like, and then like then fix it, fix that. Yep. You know?

It reminds me in the Bible where the man, I think we were talking about this in Pittsburgh, I was talking about somebody, but the man that said, it's a parable where the man has two sons and he asks one to go out and do the work and the one says, yes, he will, but he never does. Then he goes to the one and says, no, I don't want to,

but he actually does, which one is better? The one that said yes, but didn't do it or the one that he said no. It's both of them didn't you know Say their guess wasn't yes, and they're no wasn't no But one was far better than the other how many of us have ever gone and had to move and a whole bunch of people Say they'll come and help us You got like ten people who say yeah, I'll help you out and only like three show up

Lot of times, you know your friends by how many keep the. That is also what Linda said. She's experienced this a lot, but it has shown her who her real friends are. So it is, it's a gauge. And you can't even be upset with it. Like people are people. So wouldn't you rather know that these people are reliable and these people aren't. And then you just, you know, make plans off that.

Yep, yep, it's so true. It is so true. It is absolutely true. There's many ways to find out who your real friends are. True, yep. But you know what? One of my friends said to me one time, like this was kind of profound to me,

I'll be honest with you, cause I never thought about it like this, because I've always usually gone and done these things for people, but, and he did not, admittedly he was like, I suck, I'm not a good friend. Like this, so when I lost my dad, the room was full of a bunch of people and the room was full of a bunch of people

that I never suspected would be there. A lot of people that I thought would be there or not. And some of the ones that I was shocked were, like, what the heck? Like, they didn't know my dad, they were there for me. They were, I was astounded and this person lost their dad and he didn't come to mine. And he was a very close friend.

He didn't come to my dad's funeral. His dad passed. And it was, we had to drive a long way. Me and Tom had to drive a long way to go there for his dad's funeral. And Tom didn't do the funeral or anything. But, and his dad had a significant amount of people there too. But he sat there and looked at everybody.

And he was like, like people that I thought would be here aren't. And he realized the same thing. He goes, what I realized is, like, I'm not a good friend because like the people that I think should be here, I didn't show up for people's funerals that I should have been there.

It's like, you really need to like dissect, like are you what you think you are? Cause a lot of people, a lot of people are delusional. Well, and they're self-focused. They live in a delusion. You don't even think to like show up to somebody's funeral because you're so focused about like your desires and your wants, you don't even think about

other like your like hope's heart in it. Like, yeah, she probably would really appreciate. Sorry, Carrie, if you're watching. Go ahead. She would really appreciate if I was there to support her. Like people don't think like that because they're so focused on themselves. Right?

100%. But that like I've had to go to a lot of funerals, obviously, but there are funerals that I never needed to go to, and I still went. That's what you do. But then there's the other part, like I really haven't been to any funerals. But you're young, sweetie.

Right, so I wouldn't even- So that's way different. So I wouldn't have even thought how important that would be to somebody to show up. But now that makes sense to me. I'm like, oh yeah, it's more, and I hate funerals. I hate the whole concept. It feels very much like public school,

like we did not do this right. There's a disservice to the funeral world, but that's my own personal opinion. But it is for the living, you know? So you would think that, I hate funerals. I think it's so stupid. It makes no sense. We've already talked about this.

I'm not a big fan either, but it's really for the people left over. It's not for the person that passed. And so I don't want any of that stuff. But it's such a, like, depending on how the person, like with my dad, my dad passed like that. Here one second, go on the next second. And you're just like processing.

You're just like, you're kind of numb. You're like trying to just get processed like what just happened. So when people come around and they kind of distract you from having to process, that's a nice thing. Yeah, exactly. That's really where it comes into play for people. They're kind of like, okay, can I just get back

to some normalcy? I know that this is grotesque and they're kinda like, okay, can I just get back to some normalcy? I know that this is grotesque and it's not, like death is not pleasant and it's not fun to go to, but when people come around you and then you can have some conversation that's back to normal life, it does really, really help. And I think just, if you've never gone through it, you don't know it, which I didn't know it either, but I just did it.

You just do it for some reason, you just, I don't know, but that's the way it goes. Yeah. Okay. Now onto something else. Let's do sponsors really quick. Real estate appraisal associates, the Southwest Florida Inc is owned by Laura Keller.

They've been in business since 2005. They provide the most accurate certified home appraisal service in Southwest Florida. They have an upfront pricing with no hidden fees, no waiting for a couple weeks for your appraisal. They have it done in two to four days. Why do you need an appraisal? There are many reasons to get one. First, when you sell your home, it removes any concern that you're priced at too low to eliminate paying high taxes. Highest state taxes on a home you inherited to make sure that you are not paying too much in property taxes because of an inaccurate home valuation. Lastly, so that when you list

your home it's not priced too high and sits on the market for months or longer. Real estate appraisal associates of Southwest Florida are highly trusted and valued. They have done over 10,000 appraisals and they are locally owned and operated for over 30 years. They are licensed, data certified appraisers, and are an expert team. Their appraisals have a hundred percent money-back guarantee. They can provide residential real estate appraisals in the following counties Charlotte, Sarasota, Manatee, DeSoto, Hillsboro, Pinellas, and Lee. If you give them a call tell them that you heard about them from the whole pot line and

you will receive a $50 discount. The number to call is 941-743-3700 941-743-3700. Hanson's Automotive Services has been a business since 2017. With 20 years experience, they do everything from oil changes to tires to AC work to engine repair and replacement. They're not just motivated to do their best, they are auto motivated and their business lives by Proverbs 16.3. Commit to the Lord whatever you do and he will establish your plans. The number for him, you didn't change out the thing. Oh, sorry. Most professional podcast on the face of the years.

The phone number for him is 941-460-3962. 941-460-3962. And you are working on a graphic over there. I can tell. I'm ready for a comment. I'm going to add a comment. They'll know in a second on Rumble. We have a comment. I'm gonna add a comment. They'll know in a second on Rumble.

We have a comment. I have a comment for the next question. So I was going quick on it. Oh. Yeah. How do they know the next question? They don't yet. That's why I'm waiting. It's like, I have it ready.

Oh. It's preparing. Gotcha. Listen, I know what I'm doing. I just sometimes don't do too many things at one time. You need more hands. I just need a third hand that can do like, do do do do do do do do do do do.

Hey, Octopus Woman. I know, I'm telling you, just one more hand. One more. Octo Mom. Oh. Oh, I was watching. You watched the documentary. I was watching a new one, yeah. A documentary on Octo Mom. The new one.

I don't even know, I'm guessing. Is there a documentary on that woman? There's a new one. No, no, no new one, yeah. A documentary on OctuMom. The new one. I don't even know, I'm guessing. Is there a documentary on that woman? There's a new one. No, no, no, her. But now that their kids are older. They're like 14 right now. There's a whole new story now. Stop it.

Oh my gosh, she's crazy. I was like hooked on her story like 14 years ago. She is crazy. Oh, is she? No offense if you're watching. Is she Mormon? I don't know if she's a human being. I feel like they're always Mormon.

They're always Mormon. Really? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I think she's an alien. What? I'm serious. You think she's an alien? I don't think she's a human being.

I don't think she's a human being. Now I'm worried about you. I don't think she's a human being. You might be Octomom. So there was a documentary on this woman already? A new one. No, previously there was a documentary on this woman. There was a whole TV show.

Yes. Where have I been? At like 14 years ago. What were you doing 14 years ago? Were you busy? I was living life. I definitely, I don't watch TV. I think we were pregnant at the same time.

And that's why I was like so fascinated. Yeah. I was like, right. The girls had just been born. I think they're, I think they're 16. I think they're all driving. This is crazy. Jojo. Yeah. Yeah.

This is literally nuts. Why would people waste their time on this lady? Cause it was, she had eight babies in her belly. Who cares? Once. I had one. It was like this big. Cause she had eight babies in her belly. Who cares? I had one. It was like this big. Look at my movie.

Who cares? Hope, I'm gonna get you some clips. She's in that. She's in that movie. Are you serious? That's what it says. I mean like, so what she can give birth to eight kids at one time.

She didn't, they pulled. Yeah, it's like a pack of puppies. Dogs do it every day. I'm like, seriously, we don't have a daco on stinking dogs. I was like, oh my gosh. That's the one you watched? Yes.

Yeah, she's like, literally. It's like a pack of puppies being C-sectioned out of a dog. What abs, like, oh my gosh. Okay, do something that a dog can't and then I'll be clapping my hands like a seal. Oh my gosh. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. That's not how you do it.

No, that is not. Try again. Try again. Arr, arr, arr, arr, arr, arr, arr, arr. Yes. I will, I got it. That's a YouTube. Oh my gosh.

Just keep it a sheet in here. Alrighty, let's go, we got nine minutes. Let's do it. Clapping like seals and talking about Octomom. There you go. I started seeing someone new, but they still talk to their ex as friends. Listen, I know.

No, no. For people that, cause people don't watch this live, they watch it later. Can't tell you how many times people have told me that they go back and watch this or listen to it. Okay, I'm not talking about you. This question is not yours.

If this person, I'm not kidding you, I don't think this person would have wrote this question. And anyway, this is not you. Somebody's boyfriend. This is similar. I read this and I'm like, this reminds me of something, but this is not. Is that person delusional?

Do we need to talk about it? She's gonna kill you. Is it you? I'm just joking, I'm just joking. I'm just joking. I started seeing someone new, but they still talk to their ex as friends. Is this a red flag or am I overthinking it?

Talia is very passionate over here. That's not only a red flag. And so is Norma. Okay, it's not. But it's on fire. It's burning. It's not either of them. It's burning the whole world down. It's not either of them.

No, no, she's passionate right now. I don't like that. Right, she's passionate about this. Oh, I have opinions on this. Ooh, okay, let's hear it. I have a good friend. Ooh, okay. Let's hear it. Are you the friend? Or now, friend.

I thought you were trying to say Norma or Ty. No, they're passionate right now. Look it, look how passionate they are. If you have made out with the person, you cannot be friends if you have a girlfriend. Sorry, you have made out with them. You have feelings still. I don't care, you stuck your fricking tongue

down their throat. See, told you she was passionate. Here. Okay. All right. I don't care, you stuck your fricking tongue down their throat. See, told you she was passionate. I'm here. Okay. All right. Talia? Well, yeah, I just don't like it because then they still have hope, that's my thing.

I hate when the girls have hope. It's like leading them on. It like makes me so mad. I'm like, you don't have a chance, leave him alone. Okay? Well, the thing is, is... Okay, but who's to say that they even want that person anymore?

Okay. What if you're in the same... Then you don't need to be friends. Wait, what if you're in the same friend group? Why, why not? I was friends with guys I dated. And I didn't... Now is different, back then probably,

but everyone now they think completely different. Like girls now think completely different. How is, do you know how we thought back in the day? By what you're saying. Do you know how my brain? We have not evolved that much. I'm not, yeah, exactly. I am not a cave woman.

Oh my gosh. I'm saying you obviously. I'm not from the 1950s where Shirley Temple and Sandra Dee. No, I know, but you just said that you guys think different. No, I didn't say we think different. I said that I was friends with guys I dated afterwards. You said that's because we thought different. I'm like, who said?

Who said? Well, because maybe you found out you were better friends than you were boyfriend, girlfriend, and you have no interest in that whatsoever. Girls and boys can be friends. I feel like someone always catch feelings. Yeah, I feel like someone's gonna catch feelings. Well, I think people do catch feelings and then they un-catch them, like me.

I don't know about that. I think that's something good. Like nobody can hear Kellyanne. So Kellyanne needs to walk her keister on over to the mic. Yeah. I feel like you can be friends with them, but not text each other,

like not have private conversations outside of your girlfriend or boyfriend being with you. Like I'm friends with like Jer, but I only see him at church and stuff. It's only in person. Like I'm not texting him. But did you date Jer? No. Did you make out with him?

No, but it, I feel like you can still be friends with somebody and just not have private conversations behind closed doors. Okay. That's fair. I think that's fine if you didn't date them, but if you dated them closed doors. Absolutely. Okay, you know. That's fair. I think that's fine if you didn't date them, but if you dated them, it's over. Like it's over. You already had the chemistry that's never... I'm with you if they've dated, they can't have private conversations, but they can be friends. I'm with that one.

Because what if you have the same friend group? That's what I'm saying. But if you have the same friend group, you need to get over it. That's what I'm saying though. That's where I agree. Do I need no private conversations? Because all you're going to do, all you need to get over it. That's what I'm saying though, that's where I agree. I feel like I'm no private person. But only a person. Because all you're gonna do, all you're gonna, nobody can hear you Norma.

Here's the thing, like if you're in this, which was my case, we were all in the same friend group. You have to move on. And they dated other girls and the other girls weren't like, to me. I didn't want their guy. I was just friends with their guy. Did I talk to him on their boyfriend or their boyfriend?

Sometimes, but not very often. It's so we could find out where we're all hanging out. The biggest thing in my opinion, first of all, I'm probably the wrong person. Am I the wrong person, Tracy? No, this is perfect. I love this. This is so entertaining. I might be the wrong person cause I don't, this is perfect. I love this. This is so entertaining.

I might be the wrong person cause I don't have feels maybe. I don't know. I know, I know. That's why this makes, okay, go ahead. I want to hear it. First of all, I would want to know, like I don't know the answer to this question,

but if I knew this person, I would say, how long did they date? Cause that matters. That does matter. It matters. How long did you date? If it was a year or more, and if you guys thought you might be the ones

for one another, that all plays into it to a certain extent. If you were intimate with each other. Well, yeah, if you had sex, yes, that's true too. Okay. But even then, like, even then, like, I mean, I would still not, like, I'm gonna tell you, some of the, some, I think, and Tom has told me this,

some of the most attractive qualities a woman can have I think, and Tom has told me this, some of the most attractive qualities a woman can have is one that is not insecure, but secure in who they are. And if you are concerned about some little chicky poo that was, that's his past, how secure are you? Like either he's with you or he's not. that's his past, how secure are you? Like either he's with you or he's not. Okay. So if he's with you, then he picked you over them. Get ahold of your feelings.

All right. Like you're insecure, not an attractive quality. It's not. People who are jealous, people who feel inferior to others, people who always want to be like back and forth, back and forth, I don't like her, I don't like him. It's so childish, it's so high school. And maybe you are in high school, so it fits the bill. I don't know.

You know what I'm saying? But when you're an adult, act like one. And if you have to be in a room with people that maybe your boyfriend or girlfriend dated, get over it. That's life. In life, we are going to run into people that make us uncomfortable. But how secure are you within yourself? Because I can promise you, people who are insecure and high maintenance in this area, they're going to lose maybe the best thing that ever happened to them because they can't get over being jealous or over themselves having issues with stuff.

It's not an attractive quality. That's fair. You show weakness. You really do. You show weakness when you behave like that. So I would suggest to you, if this person didn't date this person for a long period of time, a year or less, there's qualifiers, right? But at the end of the day,

like, do you trust this person or do you not trust this person? Because that's really what it amounts to. Is trust with this person or has this person shown you in any way since you've been dating them that you have any concerns about his affection towards you or to someone else. I mean, is that wrong?

No. No, you're not wrong. No. If they have not shown any interest in that other human being, it's a you problem, not a him or her problem. It's a you problem and you need to figure that out and if you don't figure it out, they might dump you. And is it worth that? I mean seriously people get sick and tired. I mean, people, especially guys, get sick and tired of jealous females because they're catty and it just shows like you have an insecurity issue and that's not fun to deal with because

it turns into having to maintenance you and your insecurities. It's not cool. Yeah. It's not cool. Yeah. It's not cool. It gets old. Instead of having fun with another, when another, you have to watch your words. Because if you say something about somebody

that might lead to that other person, then there's a fight. Like who wants that? Does that make sense ladies? It does. Okay. Be secure in who you are. If he picked you, you're the winner.

Act like a winner. Not like the loser. Be confident. Know your value. And set a boundary. It's like, they're not gonna like go out to like friend dinners on their own, you know, like, or a private conversation.

I mean, what are the odds that this person, did it say it was a girl or a guy? They didn't say. Okay, so I don't know. If this is a guy, like girls hate this. Yeah. Girls hate this as much as I think guys hate it. Yeah.

It's especially, I mean, for me, if a guy is jealous and all that, I hate that crap. But I don't like people who aren't confident either. I like people who are sure of themselves. I don't like maintenance in people. I'm low maintenance. I'm not a micromanager. I like people to do their own things

and me to do my own thing. And that at the end of the day, you trust me enough to know that I'll get the job done but also that I will be loyal and faithful to you till the end. And so for me anybody who shows me other than that call it a day and be secure in calling it a day. Yeah. That you can find better. What is that? It's all trust issues but But usually if you're jealous and you're worried about somebody who's giving you no reason to be and they've told you and told you and told you again,

like, I don't know, this might be a new, this is a new relationship. How many times has this person bothered the other person to convince them that there's nothing there? Maybe once or twice, but maybe a bunch. Eventually that's going to get old and they're not going to want to deal with it anymore. So if you like this person, then yeah. Truth. Truth. That's it. We ran out of time. That's a shocker. All right, people. We'll see you on Friday. You better be here. You will not be disappointed. Bye! Real Talk.