The Hope Hotline - The Hope Hotline | S01-E63| 08-23-23

Episode Date: August 23, 2023

Question #1 My husband and I are a saved 27- and 29-yearold, married for two years, and have two young babies together. This past year, my husband has fallen alarmingly away from the Lord and it shows in all aspects of his life. Am I warranted Biblically to divorce him or is this something God intends for me to endure.Question #2 Forgiving yourself? Scripture talks about forgiving others in Matthew 6:14, Matthew 18:21, Luke 6:37, Colossians 3:13, and Ephesians 4:32.

Welcome to the Hope Hotline. Thank you so much for joining in today. We have record, record, record, record, record, record, record breaking numbers on Friday. Super happy about that. Let me fix this. Yeah, really great numbers. I think it's because of my guest, Natalie. But nobody knew about Natalie was coming on. I know. Except for Natalie's friends. That's true.

So the problem is, if Natalie's friends are the ones that brung it on Friday, we're going back down. No, I'm just kidding. Our numbers were really good before. How many extras do you think we had on Friday? 20. The normal? Yeah, maybe 15.

Yeah, I was thinking 10, 10, 15. Yeah, which ain't bad. Yeah. But a great topic. So if you are needing medical care and you don't want to go to the system, watch Friday's podcast. You can find out how to get a hold of where natalie works and uh hook up your hook up and and get yourself set up um but friday's podcast was i think it's one of my favorites me too but me too like that's my

friend so it's super easy cool that we're doing it's cool that we're doing that. I know. I'm thrilled that she's, like, listen, Natalie's like me. She's always going the opposite. She's like a salmon. She's like me. We're always swimming upstream. We're going the opposite direction. We are not twigs on the river of life. We're not.

I love it. We're like going up against the current baby and fighting every way. But you know, the sad part about that is, is once we get to our destination, it's over. We like turn, what is it? You turn pink. Is that what the color is? I don't know. Salmon get really gross. They start falling apart at the very end. I don't plan to go out that way, though. No, you're not. I don't plan on going out that way for a while. So I'm super excited.

Just before the podcast, my little elf, Heather, comes in, and she's waiting for me to stop doing stuff so she can have my full attention. And she informs me, we are nine away from my number that I want to have. I specifically prayed to the Lord, Lord, I want 500 people registered for this conference. We are at 491 people. Now, she advised that I flash you guys in order to get the numbers up higher. I, on the other hand, am not going to do that because I'll lose numbers if I do that. So what we're going to do is whoever is number 500 and signs up and you're number 500, I'm going to have a special gift for you.

And we'll make sure you get it Thursday night. And if you don't show up Thursday night, then I get to keep it. How about that? So number 500, whoever's number 500, they will get a special prize. How's that sound? I love it. It's way better than me flashing you people you might vomit i can promise you you're gonna get sick that's all i'm gonna tell you oh my gosh hope or blind it's one of the two you're gonna be very violently ill or blind oh my gosh but we did our upper arms and chest exercises today so girls getting in shape. You are.

You might not be sick in about a year. Ooh. But I'm still not going to do it. I was going to say, is that like next year? Is like the 600th? The only way that's going to happen is if I go to New Orleans and I go down Bourbon Street. Okay. Wow.

We're in Rome. Yeah, not going to happen either. I've already been down there. Yeah. And that's back in my naughty days and I still didn't do that then. So it's not going to happen. I'm not doing it. Impressive. It's not going to happen either. I've already been down there. And that's back in my naughty days, and I still didn't do that then. So it's not going to happen. I'm not doing it. Impressive.

It's not going to happen. So we are at 491 for the conference. I'm so excited. What I'm really excited about is, like, I know that some people can't come for the whole entire thing. Like, my girlfriend, Pastor Clover, she's bringing 30 some odd women to the conference Friday night. She's out of town. Last year she came for several of the conference meetings. She's out of town.

She gets in town on Friday afternoon or whatever. She's bringing 30 some odd of her ladies to the conference. Which, listen, if Jennifer, I'm not going to say her last name, Jennifer, who used to attend here, they've gone and they started attending. They're helping them because, you know, they planted this church a few years ago. And they're like, Pastor Clover, Pastor Clover is actually my girlfriend that came here and she was on the podcast. And she's going to start her own podcast. Well, their church is now, they just announced they're going to two meetings, two services on Sunday morning.

They're growing exponentially. And so Jennifer and her husband Jack, who used to come here and that are seeking to go into the ministry, they go to the river, both of them, the River Tampa's school. So now they're plugged in to the River Fort Myers. And so we're going to get to see her, which I'm super excited about because I'm so happy that that's where they're going and getting ministerially wise, that is such a great place for them to plug in and they can do monumental things for Pastor Clover and her husband. And they're just amazing people.

Yeah, I love that. So she's coming. She's registered. So we'll be looking for her. You know who I'm talking about, right? Yeah. I love her. I do too.

Like she is like such a great human being. She really is. And her husband was huge in getting us set up when we moved into this building. Like they're just, I'm just telling you like their servants and their hearts are so good. And I know when they actually step out and they do ministry because of the seed they're sowing they're going to do so well it's going to be but they're a huge of huge value so thursday night is me uh thursday morning is mcgallis and breakfast if you have not what did you friday morning thank you talia friday morning is breakfast because i don't want people uh the the caterer uh the restaurant that we're having um so uh dary Barbecue, we only have a few slots left

because breakfast is for 300 people and we only have 30 slots left. So register. Daryl's Barbecue is actually making breakfast for us. It's going to be chicken and waffles. Very nice. Homemade. We tasted it. It was unbelievable. homemade and like we tasted it it was like unbelievable chicken and waffles potatoes

like everything is so fresh um it's not like a big chain kind of thing because they're um they're a mom and pop i love it so um but i will tell you like i stole this idea from um adalas and magalas from theirs because they did Cracker Barrel. And even though Cracker Barrel is a big chain, I love Cracker Barrel. And they killed it. They did a great job. But we went with a mom and pop because we were able to around here. So they are doing fresh hash browns, potatoes.

They have breakfast burritos, isn't it's wrap it's a wrap i'm talking to tell you uh so it's three different kinds of breakfast wraps fruit eggs and bacon i already said potatoes yep so it's going to be a great meal. I might be missing something. If I am, it's okay. Whatever. So breakfast, then Magalas will be speaking. Then Friday night, Pastor Adalas will be here. And that's when the big crowds come in. That's when the big guns are coming in. Because that's when we have a lot of people showing up, like from Fort Myers and stuff. So it's going to be a great time.

But I am, again, nine people short. Number 500. like from Fort Myers and stuff like that. So it's going to be a great time. But I am, again, nine people short, number 500. I have to make sure we tell, can somebody text Heather and be telling her to watch for number 500? Thank you, Talia, because I want to make sure. And it ain't going to be no chintzy-wintzy gift. This is going to be good. It's going to be a good gift. So, and I'm not talking like a gift basket.

I mean, I'm going to make sure it's good. So, like a cheap old gift basket. No, we don't do nothing cheap, but it's going to be a nice gift. What else do I have? Just that they can watch it here on Thursday. And we're posting about it too. We posted on Foundation Church already, but we're also in the comments and people are asking where they can watch it here on thursday and we're posting about it too we posted on foundation church already but we're also in the comments and people are asking where they can

okay can you put yourself on please yes i can thank you she went she did the gym today so she braided her hair so it can be a nice and curly for tomorrow you got it uh-huh i know i know what i'm doing i know what i'm doing she likes her husband loves it when it's nice and wavy and curly he does he likes this too he's like this is basketball tracy and then the next one is like I'm doing what I'm doing. She likes, her husband loves it when it's nice and wavy and curly. He does. He likes this too. He's like, this is basketball Tracy. And then the next one is like crazy Tracy.

So you'll see fluffy hair. Fluffy hair. So on Thursday, we'll be live here on the Hope Hotline Facebook, on Rumble, and on YouTube. Is it only on the Hope Hotline? Only Hope Hotline. Hope Hotline, Rumble. Rumble. Hope Hotline, Facebook.

Hope Hotline. So it's all, because Hotline Rumble. Rumble. Hope Hotline Facebook. Hope Hotline. So it's all, because my husband has his podcast. So he's taking over all of the platforms for the church and for himself. Yeah. Which if he wasn't so hot, I might not be okay with it. But look at the man. And he broke numbers last night. If you watch the podcast, he was like 35, 40 shy of 1,000 last night.

So good. So, cha-ching. We've been praying over that. It's so good. So he's going to be on all the platforms Thursday night. But after that. Right. So wait a minute.

So Black Robe, you can go on Black Robe and watch the conference? Yes, because we have our own. You'll have to click on the Hope Hotline, all the platforms. So Hope Hotline platform on YouTube. You'll have to go to the Hope Hotline platform, Rumble, Hope Hotline platform. So if you follow Foundation and Pastor Tom's TLP, make sure you go to our platform, the Hope Hotline, and the ladies' conference will be there for Thursday specifically

because he's live Thursday night. And then the rest of the time. Friday and Saturday. I'm not going to be on Hope Hotline anymore. It'll just be Foundation Church, correct? I don't know. I think we can cross-reference. That's what we'll do for this.

Okay, so try both or whatever. But definitely Foundation Church. Yeah, yes, exactly. So you can watch the rest of the conference from the Foundation Church and maybe Hope Hotline. Yeah. Maybe. But definitely go to Foundation Church and you'll find us there.

Yes, you got it. Which would be great. And what else? Well, you want to tell them just real quick again what Thursday, Friday, Saturday looks like? I think I did. Okay. But I didn't tell them what times.

You look it up. But make sure, did you put the little thingy-ups for them to register? Yeah, I did. I'll do it again now real quick. So register, go to events. Please make sure that you do breakfast and the conference separate

because you're not going to get to the breakfast. If I have over 300 people, there's only 300 seats. So I'm not going to be able to fit you in, which I don't want to do that to people. But register for both and use that QR code if you want, or just go to thefoundationchurchfl.com, click events, and go to the beloved anew you. So we're good at that.

I am so dang excited. Listen, I'm not kidding you. I was telling Tracy on my way to, this happened twice today already. I'm a hot mess. I ain't gonna lie to you. We've all been fasting. Tomorrow breaks our fast at six o'clock tomorrow night,

which I don't even know if I'll be able to eat because I'm speaking first or whatever. It doesn't matter. So like we've been fasting for 21 days, six to six. And I was on my way to the gym this morning and I'm singing, I'm listening to Throne Room, which is one of the songs that will be played at the conference. And I'm ugly crying the whole entire way to the gym.

Like, it's not, and I'm wiping tears away, and I'm worshiping. I look like a freak. I look like a flipping freak. I get to the church here before the podcast, you know, had to about two hours ago. Again, I'm sitting in the car listening. I'm a, I'm a mess. I'm just like the Holy Spirit is like, just you are ready. And then I started going over my message and I get to the swim part

and I'm like, am I going to even be able to speak about this without bawling my brains out? I don't know. I'm a pile of mush right now. Like I could almost cry right now. The Holy Spirit is like super thick. So I'm really excited. Very excited. There's been lots of people who've been fasting and praying about this weekend. I think it's going to be huge for a lot of reasons. And I think just come expecting because it's going to be probably better than you thought. And it's going to be better than last year. And last year was pretty dang great. But the place looks amazing. I'm going to tell you. It looks amazing. Heather and Rexanne have knocked it out of the park. Trish, too, because Trish has been helping. And their teams.

Rexanne's team and stuff like that have done a great job getting the place ready. You're going to love it when you see it. Totally looks different. And that's it. I think I've wasted 15 minutes talking about it. But it's not wasted because I need nine more people to sign up. Let's go. Hey, listen, tell Heather to be watching and tell us if she's watching. She's watching this and she

will give you a text there. Tell us when the number 500, I'll announce who it is. Okay. Well, I might not announce their last name because I might not like that. So, all right, let's go to the first question. Now, here's the thing. This first question was sent to me last week. And the reason I'm actually answering it ahead of other ones is because it's time sensitive. Normally, like some people have to wait a month for me to get to their question. In this case, this one's only a week. So when you hear their question or do you hear your question right now, and I give you the answer, if you ever in the future send me something and it takes me a month

to get to it, only know that it's because it's time sensitive. Normally it is way longer than this for me to get to your question. So here we go. My husband and I are a saved 27 and 29 year old married for two years and have two young babies together. This past year, my husband has fallen alarmingly away from the Lord and it shows in all aspects of his life. He will not attend church, gets caught in lies, has awful language, lacks compassion and empathy for myself and anyone around him, and he overall is no longer serving God. We also have not been intimate in almost two years since we first got married,

which leads me to believe there is some form of adultery, although he hasn't been caught and denies it. I feel like after fervent prayer and exhausting all avenues, I can no longer submit to him as he is not submitting unto the Lord. However, I want to make sure I am doing what's biblical and not just what I feel. I've stuck around this past year praying the Lord would change his heart again and bring him back to his godly self to lead our family, but that's not happening and ultimately has to be a choice. Am I warranted biblically to divorce him or is this something God intends for me to endure?

So I've answered questions like this before in the past, and it is very, very clear that unless adultery is in play, you absolutely cannot get a divorce. I understand that his behavior is nothing that you're used to in the last two years. Like the man that you fell in love with is no longer the man that exists. And that's very, very difficult. Also, the lack of intimacy and things like that, his behavior, his anger, all those things, that makes it even more difficult to stay around. But I can promise you this, unless he's committing physical adultery, you biblically cannot divorce him unless you, the Bible says that you can't divorce him unless for that reason.

I mean, Jesus was very clear about that. What I would say to you is this. It does sound like to me, in all honesty, if he hasn't been intimate with you for two years and you're both very young, it does sound like something is going on. Probably pornography is one of the things, but, and the Bible does say lust of the eye is the same as lust of the flesh. But personally myself, I wouldn't trust that to be your venue to get a divorce. Physical activity, physical intimacy with somebody else, physical adultery is something that I would stand on.

If it was me in this situation and you haven't caught him, I would do everything in my power to catch him. And that sounds crazy. But I mean, I would not go I mean, I would not be remiss in having a friend or something that he would he may not know, be maybe a willing volunteer or something like that to see where he's going. Like, what is he doing? What does he do throughout his day?

Find out if there's places he's going, if he's going to another house or an apartment or something like that that you don't know about. Then find out who lives there. I mean, there are ways. There's always ways to find out what's going on. And you can only deny something for so long. When evidence starts piling up.

So I've been cheated on. And I'm just telling you. No. Not by Tom. And not since I was a Christian. But I have had a past relationship where the person cheated on me like crazy. OK, they always deny it. There's always a fight that occurs so that they can leave the house. There's a lot of anger always involved. And I mean, I don't know if you guys want to disclose or anything,

but about being cheated on. Logan, have you ever been cheated on? Are you comfortable answering that question? I have been a cheater. Oh, you have been a cheater. Okay, so this is good. Yeah. This is good to know because here's the thing.

It actually gives insight to what a person's thinking like I was a dog back in the day not like out there but I never committed to anybody because I didn't want to after I had been hurt I was like I'll never I wasn't going and sleeping around but I wasn't like I was not saying to a guy, I would just be, I'm just going to hang out or I'm just going to be with you. I didn't even ever commit. I always dated. So I don't know the thought processes behind how do you, how do you cheat? What may, what's the vein of getting out? I mean, this person might need to know. I mean, you're a girl, but it's still the same, Like the signs of a cheater.

Do you know what I'm saying? And then if anything that she says is like hot points for you, what you need to do is do what I said. Figure out a way to find out if he is legitimately cheating, and then you're free to go. But you can't do that until you and there are ways to find out like phone and like you can figure this out but go ahead because i would love to hear your insight full disclosure it was never on my husband oh yeah no no no i didn't think so

yeah i didn't think so never on chris but um prior i just enjoyed kind of the juggle and the risk because I never lived with any of them. And the attention was always nice. So I would look for phones face down. There are certain phone apps that I never use, but I know are very popular. What would they be? Do you know the names of them? Could she look them up to find them? Absolutely.

Yeah, there's different ones. What the phone app would be like, like if you're going to look up a phone app, what would you use? Cheaters phone app? I mean, like, how do you look it up? There's so many. Yeah, because I was married before, and there was adultery. And I, like, if you love the Lord, if she loves the Lord, and she's being pure, he's going to show her. Yeah, I agree.

One hundred percent, because it happened to me. Your instincts always tell you the truth. It's just, it ends up in your face. I saw multiple things that had happened, and I almost thought my mind was tricking me. But one of the things was a phone and it was a game and they were chatting through the game. I was going to say there's a calculator. There's a calculator where you can hide stuff, photos and all that stuff. What?

And it says calculator. So you can have a calculator. It looks like a calculator on your phone. Yes. And that phone actually, Talia's saying yes, as if Talia knows. How in the world do you know go on tiktok and find out calculator you only need one if you have an iphone you don't need two yeah right correct i mean the obvious ones like tinder and snapchat um bumble anything

like any dating app that's a huge red flag i never even thought about those if he has a code on his phone that she can't have access to. That's always a bad sign. That is the first sign. Bringing it into the bathroom. Hiding it under your pillow at night. Yep. Constantly deleting like your iWatch messages. Now Apple's a double-edged sword. So if you have access to their iMessages on a laptop, that's a great way to catch something. That is a really great idea. Or when their iWatch is charging and they're in the shower,

you can scroll through those. Or if there's a code on it, there's another warning sign. So there's no, like, now I know there's ways to break the code because that was my previous job that's i i helped train people on how to break into phones i didn't personally train people i worked with the people helped train but i said it so for law enforcement and stuff so like there's ways to break into a phone, but that's expensive. Unless you know a cop, but then they are not even allowed to use that device. But God will show you 100%.

But you have to be pure too. If you're doing things, not cheating, but if you're doing things, God's not going to honor that. So you're just going to, like two years, there's probably been things that you're either missing or you are in denial about. Oh yeah. Two years of no sexual contact with a 29 year old ain't going to happen. I wanted to say was if you insert yourself, if you can try to initiate sex at some point and it is different, there's your sign sign what do you mean it it's that it's different um that i don't understand whenever you explore sex with different people you're introduced to different

styles different things and if you're envisioning another person while you're sleeping with your husband it could seem more intense or vice versa so if he's having sex with his wife and envisioning another woman, it could just be different. It could feel completely different. Like their mind is somewhere else. Does that make sense? Yeah, and even like if you're watching porn,

like you start doing different things because you've seen different things. So like, yeah, she's 100% right. 100% right. See, I'm learning something new myself. That's interesting. But if she's gonna gonna if she already wants to divorce him you might as well go to these levels yeah to figure it out but never entrapment yeah i wouldn't i wouldn't make a fake profile to trick him that's oh no no no no i wouldn't do any of that either yeah no i wouldn't do that either right but but but i would absolutely and i'm not kidding you literally would find somebody who will follow him yeah bank statements are great

yeah exactly yeah but if they have a separate credit card you might not know about it those you know what i'm saying there's a wallet when they're in the shower if there's a new credit card oh yeah that's true cash a lot of cash right um charges to like venmo cash app you know things that aren't actual locations man conniving and schemers holy mackinolies I was gonna say oh that's true. She was a cop. Right, right. That's true. She knows. Wowzers. Okay, I knew I was, like, literally in my head, I'm like, I'm going to ask you guys, because I'm like, they might know. Yeah, unfortunately.

Yeah, unfortunately, yes. What were you going to say, but? No, but because it happened, here I am today. Oh, I know. You know what I mean? What the enemy meant for evil, God totally turned for good. So, yeah, and that's for her, too. Oh, yeah.

If you honor God, like I said I wasn't going to ever get a divorce, even when I found out this. I even said we have two children. We have the same situation. I said, I made a vow to you for better or worse. And this is worse. And so let's do what we can to see if we can even make this work. And he was like, no. So there was another verse that I was wondering what you thought about. It's a first Corinthians seven is the, and it's principles for marriage. And it says on verse 15, But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved.

God has called you. So I was curious, your thought on that. So, yeah, and there's things about divorce that people don't understand, like, even with, like, there's abandonment, which is talked about in Deuteronomy. If he abandons her or if he leaves her, it's totally different. It doesn't sound like that's what he's doing. He's just making her life miserable. Right.

Right? If he leaves and he's the one that files for divorce, because in the Bible it says back in biblical times, women could never leave the man. The man was the only one allowed to file for divorce because in the Bible it says back in biblical times, women could never leave the man. The man was the only one allowed to file for divorce. Yep. That's nuts. Yeah.

But it's true. But it was, yeah. And also, like back in biblical times, men would like find any reason to divorce a woman. If he didn't like how she cooked her meal, the meal, if she burned it, or if he was like, I don't like how you look anymore. Women were possessions.

They really weren't held of any value. Like today, we're valued. So men could just toss you aside. And when it talks about that woman, there's a scripture that talks about how if a man divorces a wife and she marries another and she commits adultery, that's not what that means, actually. That means that if he filed for divorce but but he didn't give papers to her, and he still kept her and then was with another woman and married to another woman, then she commits adultery. Because you had to file for divorce.

And what was happening is they weren't filing for divorce. They were just going and finding a new woman, marrying her. And then you had this other woman on the side, and she's left to her own demise. She can't do anything because she couldn't file for divorce because women weren't allowed to file for divorce. Yeah. Only men. Wow. So basically that's what you're making this woman commit adultery because you won't release her.

So you have to file the paperwork. That's why when people say you can get married without, you can go and get married without the judge or the pastor or whatever, people literally go to the mountains and tie the knot. They have their vows that they share between the two of them with no one present. And they consider themselves legally married. You're not legally married. Even in biblical times, they had to.

Joseph was going to divorce Mary. He had to file paperwork. They had never consummated. They had never had a ceremony. But back in biblical times, when you asked a woman to be your wife, a whole year would pass while you were trying to get the room and everything ready and the addition onto your dad's house. So like once you said, I want you to be my wife, you were considered legally married. And so even though there had been no ceremony between

Joseph and Mary, and they were not legally bound in a way like we are today, he would have still had to file for divorce. He had to file paperwork against her because he had gone to her parents and said, she's going to be my wife. So you have to, there's legalities. They had them back then. So we must have them today. If you are married and you have to, like, there's legalities. They had them back then, so we must have them today. If you are married and you did it without legal paperwork, without filing a certificate of marriage with the county courthouse or whatever, you're not married. It's not facts.

And it doesn't have to be under the eyes of God. If you went to the courthouse, got married by a judge or a notary or whatever, you're legally married. There is legal documentation that says you are bound to this person. There is a commitment, a covenant between the two of you. And if that's the case,

you have to file divorce paperwork. If you didn't do it that way, there's no divorce paperwork. So you're not do it that way, there's no divorce paperwork. So you're not legally married. Right. Yeah. In the eyes of God. Because, again, they had to do it then.

So I would just say do everything you can to find out if he's cheating. The odds are he has in the past. He might be doing it now or he might be thinking of the future. Something's going on, though. It says, ain't no 29-year-old. No. Not getting busy with something. Yeah.

Do a heart check. What do you mean, do a heart check? If you are 29 and you have had two kids and... She's 27, he's 29. Okay, if you're 27, you've had two kids, you've let yourself go a little bit, and you are not putting forth the effort to like, just check your own heart. Um,

see if there's anything that you are not doing anymore. If you are not, um, initiating sex, like don't throw it all on him. Definitely reflect. But also if you know me, come find me.

I'll help you. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, we have a lot of ladies that'll go and ride in a car and hunt him down like a dog. No, I'm just kidding. I got nothing to do until this baby comes. So just give me a call. Oh my gosh.

I don't even know who this is. So go to Logan. You can email us. Go to Logan. She can hook you up. You can just askhopeathopehotline.com. Just send an email. I'll get you hooked up. Oh my gosh. Dear, dear Lords of mercy. That's something else. But yeah, I mean, that is true, Logan. But here's the thing. They were together before and in the last two years, and I don't know how old the kids are. They might've

had the kids prior to being married or whatever like that because they are young it's been in within the last two years but listen pregnancy has a way of adjusting things throughout the body its body does not look exactly the same after you have children. That's a fact. And it can, I mean, we can do our part to make sure that we, on the physical side, because men are visual creatures. It is our responsibility to make sure that we are visually appealing to our spouse. So again, like, true, Logan, are you doing your part? But at the end of the day, let me just make it very clear. There is no reason, no justified reason to treat somebody poorly and, on top of that,

not, because the Bible tells us we are not to abstain sexually from each other. So women can't abstain sex from their husband to make them pay for not doing the dishes or whatever. Do you know what I'm saying? And men cannot do the same to a woman. We are to not forsake each other. And if that's happening, he is wrong. But Logan has a very good point. Make sure you're doing your part to be appealing.

Like my mom, I love this about my mom. It really taught me something. Then we'll move to the next question. My mom and dad had kids very, very young. Like my mom didn't even graduate. She was like six months from graduating high school, and she ran off and married my dad because he was in the military. So common back then, right?

A lot of girls didn't finish high school because they fell in love and their husbands were in the military or whatever, whatever. She ended up finishing her high school and stuff like that, but it was many, many years later. So, but one thing, my mom literally got pregnant, like, right away. And so one thing, my mom always stayed home with us until I was in the fourth grade. And then she went and she worked, her and my dad actually worked at a job together. But when she stayed home, one of the things that I remember her doing, and listen, we lived

in Florida with no AC. All we had is those jealousy windows, which like hot as tar, people. I don't care about climate change. You live in the middle of Florida. You ain't seen climate change, okay? Hot as crap. There ain't no airflow. And I don't care how far you can open those slats to those windows. You're dying. That's all there is to it. In the midst of the summer heat, my mother would, before my dad got home, every day with us ragamuffins going all over the place, driving her nuts, she would make sure that before my dad came home, she would change her outfit. She would change her outfit. You know, I don't know if she took a shower all the time, but probably did because it was so flippin' hot. But her hair was done.

If she felt like she needed to put makeup on, she put the makeup on. And she always looked cute. So when my dad came home from work, she was cute. And she was not the way she looked all day with us. I think that's super important. I remember that to this day.

I have not lived up to that for Tom. But I'm just saying, I think about that. And I realized you have to care about your appearance. Men are totally visual beings. And they married us a certain way. and we married them a certain way so flips both ways right right but i married tom way fatter than what he is right now so like he's got no leg to stand on i mean i have no leg to stand on because he's a biggin when i married him so anytime weight, whatever. But he married me like 98 pounds. This girl ain't 98 pounds.

And I'm never going to go back to 98 pounds because that was too skinny. But I'm just saying, we need to make sure that we're beautiful for them. They married us because we were eye candy to them. Keep being eye candy. So, all right, let's move on. Okay.

All right, next question. Forgiving yourself. Scripture talks about forgiving others in Matthew 6, 14, Matthew 18, 21, Luke 6, 37, Colossians 3, 13, and Ephesians 4, 32. So I'm going to read these scriptures to you. And then, so Matthew 6, 14 says, For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. Matthew 18, 21 says, Then Peter came to him and said,

Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me? And I forgive him up to seven times. Luke 6.37 says, Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Colossians 3.13 says, Ephesians 4.32 says, and be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ

forgave you. So I'm going to just tell you, okay, so the scriptures, there are none, I looked, that say that you must forgive yourself. But let's face it. You can't love somebody unless you love yourself, right? And that doesn't mean in a prideful way. But the truth is, is God created us. We're his temple. We have to love what he created. We are made in his image. And it doesn't matter what you've done in your past,

how far you think you can go and not be forgiven. Forgiveness as far as from the east is to the west. There is absolutely nothing that we can do that God will not forgive us for. Not one thing. And some people go, no, I apostatize. Okay, I'm just telling you, if you did the great apostasy, and you feel like you've gone too far, you blasphemed the Holy Spirit and all this other stuff. Listen, if you care, then you didn't do it. Because people who've done that, they don't want to be saved.

They don't want to have anything to do with the Holy Spirit. They don't want reconciliation. anything to do with the Holy Spirit. They don't want reconciliation. It's not their goal. Okay, so you can't, you haven't done any of those things. I can promise you. Otherwise, you wouldn't care. Even people who are atheists, people who have wanted nothing to do with God and have said the most harshest and unkind things, and then they get saved. God looks at the heart. He really knows if you mean what you say or if you're just being an idiot, right? All of us have been idiots. I have said things that were not the smartest of things to say when I wasn't saved, okay? But none of them, not a one of them do I feel or have felt ever will keep me out of the kingdom of heaven. His forgiveness is far exceeding and his restoration and reconciliation

with him is way more his mercy. Like if you look at his mercy, it's crazy. If you look at the Old Testament mercy to the New Covenant mercy, you'd sit there and go, I'm good. I don't have to worry about anything. Forgiving yourself, and maybe this question is just because you want to know about forgiveness for oneself and like because there's nothing that's said about it and you're just curious about that. Or you're a person that has a very tough time. You have no problem forgiving others, but maybe you're not able to forgive yourself. I'm going to tell you the greatest example of

someone that needed forgiveness and received it was Paul. Paul persecuted Christians. He beat them. He jailed them. He murdered them. When Stephen was murdered, the deacon, the first martyr, Stephen, when he was murdered, the very person that was holding the coats of the people stoning him was Paul. Paul was the one that initiated, if you will. So Paul was on a mission to kill Christians because he was a Pharisee of Pharisees. And so he didn't believe in Jesus until he had the Damascus Road experience, in which Jesus came to him and said, Paul, Paul, why are you persecuting me? Through that whole process and through being blind, being taken to the ground,

having to have the two men that were with him, which one is believed to be Luke, having to be taken to a place blind, wait for three days, eat nothing, and on the third day have a messenger from the Lord come and restore your vision, that'll make you wake up. But then you sit there and go, okay, now, Lord, you've told me not to persecute you. You've told me you have a ministry for me. How do I forgive myself for all the lives that I've taken or all the people who are currently in prison because of me

or the people that I've tortured, and all these different things made their lives miserable. What do I do about that? 1 Timothy 1, 15 through 17 says, This is a faithful saying and worthy of all acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief. However, for this reason I obtained mercy. And this is Paul. That in me, first Jesus Christ might show all longsuffering as a pattern to those who are going to believe in him for everlasting life. Now to the king eternal, immortal, invisible,

to God who alone is wise, be honor and glory forever and ever. Let's look at Galatians 5.1. It says, Stand fast, therefore, in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and you not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage. Okay, so I'm telling you right now, if Paul can write to Timothy and then to the people of Galatia and tell them who he is in Christ. He is free. And then he says, don't be again entangled by a yoke of bondage.

If you don't forgive yourself, all you are doing is walking in bondage. And we are told not to do that. If Paul can be forgiven and then forgive himself, then you can forgive yourself. I am sure there's probably, I'm sure you didn't murder multiple Christians or had them thrown into prison. I mean, those things are pretty tough. There are things you probably say,

but he did that, but I did this. All of it's forgivable. There's not one thing. There is not one distance that you can go that's too far for what Jesus did on that cross for you. There's not one thing. I'm just telling you, walk in freedom. And as long, and I think about this right now,

but as long as you potentially, if this is you, as long as you don't forgive yourself, you are the devil's play toy because he is distracting you and keeping you from doing all that God has for you. If he can distract you with being so bound up with guilt, condemnation, which means rendered useless, you are rendered useless. As long as you condemn yourself and you don't take the forgiveness that is being provided to you, you'll do nothing. And there's nothing better that the devil loves is somebody who's ineffective. Because we are to preach the gospel, win souls for the Lord, and then disciple them so that they can do, in turn, the same thing. So as long as you don't forgive yourself, you're ineffective for him.

And really, that's great for the devil, but it ain't great for Jesus. So get over yourself. Get over not forgiving yourself. Move on. Enjoy life. Take what was done on the cross for yourself. And then go start winning the lost. Go start discipling believers.

And have a great life. Because, man, feeling condemned or feeling like you don't amount is pretty rough. That's no way to live. No way to live at all. But I will tell you, when I got my life right with God, that was one of the toughest things I had to deal with. When I got my life right. And I admitted and looked in the mirror and said, this is all your fault.

Like everything that happened to you, look in the mirror. It's all you. You can try and blame anybody you want to, but it's all you. You made the decisions. You did the deeds. It's all on you. I remember telling my parents, I'd be like, how do I forgive myself? Like I can forgive lots of people, but it's me.

How do I forgive me? But I'm just telling you, it was the best day of my life when I did, because that's no way to live. It's no way to live. And it's very freeing. And man, joy comes. The joy just comes. So what does the Bible say about corrupt governments? I read that we must submit to it. That makes no sense to me. It makes no sense to you because you have a constitution, and that supersedes our government. So that's the reason why it makes no sense to you,

because you're a smart human being. Otherwise, if you lived in another country, they don't have the constitution, and they might have to submit to their government. We, as Americans, we can tell them to go pound sand, which is what we did at COVID. Go pound sand. We don't submit to your authority. You're not our governing authority.

The Constitution is. Let's read Acts 5, 27 through 29. It says, And when they had brought them, they set them before the council. And the high priest asked them, this is Peter, did we not strictly command you not to teach in this name? Now these were his governing authorities. And look, you have filled Jerusalem with your doctrine and intend to bring this man's blood on us. But Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men.

Oh, oh my goodness. I think that supersedes Romans 13, which is what every Christian, when every place closed, they justified themselves for closing. But Peter, I mean, we should slap his hands. He's not a good neighbor, our community partner. Because he said to his governing authorities, along with the other apostles, we ought to obey God rather than men. It's so funny how we only stick to the scriptures that fit our agenda.

We didn't really want to stand up to people, not me, in general. Christians didn't want to stand up to people because they were too afraid. And it says the cowardly will not inherit the kingdom of heaven. So if you're cowardly, get a backbone because it's about to get worse before it gets better. We don't submit to anyone but God and his authority. And whatever God says, we do. Just like Peter did. Romans 13 only applies, like, if you see the blue lights behind you, and you're, you know, ran a stop sign, or you were speeding. Not hope. Lead foot here. And you get pulled over.

You submit to that authority. That's not what, when the government says we're shutting down and you guys can't meet, you can't meet at your place of assembly, the church, that's bull. I mean, that's the reason why we have America, to be perfectly honest with you. Our ancestors said, you know what? We want religious freedom. So we're not going to live here anymore. We're leaving England, and we're going to have religious freedom.

So we're going to – they gave up their lives so that we could have religious freedom. So to come here and sacrifice everything, and then when COVID comes, all of us go, all right, we'll Zoom. We'll do the Zoom. What do we just do to all the things that these people did for us so that we have religious freedom? It's just craziness to me. Well, Logan has something to say. I do. I know.

She's like. I just want to say that Foundation Church has done a phenomenal job at being a basic training the past year for this moment. Because I said it to a friend this morning. I feel like we're going to have another lockdown. Oh, it's coming. Oh, it's coming. They're trying in October. We have been prepping for being the restraining and saying no and putting on the armor of God.

Like I'm ready. And I talked to Chris about it last night. Whatever you got to do, God's got us. 100%. We are. That's the thing what people don't realize, which is a great word that you used, Logan. We are the restraining.

As long as we restrain the evil that's going on in this world, then it doesn't happen. It's when we cave to it and we say, okay, we'll do what you say. The restraining is gone and it is over. It is over. But the word is clear. As long as there are people that are saying, no way, not on my watch, it's not happening. And people need to rise up. It's coming again. They need to rise up. There's some fishy, scandalous nonsense going on right now. And people aren't falling for it like they did COVID. There's some, like everybody was like, with COVID, I don't believe in conspiracy theories. Well, like if a normal vaccine takes like 18 years,

and this one didn't take 18 months, that's not a conspiracy theory that's stupid okay but even so like maui now people are like this don't sound right this thing with maui this don't look right this don't sound right the farm's being uh bought up and and cowsing. So that's going to create climate change. People aren't buying it. They want us to eat bugs. Not going to do it. I mean, it's just crazy to me how people are like, maybe these aren't conspiracy theories. Maybe I was never a conspiracy theorist at all,

but now all of the ones that they were saying were conspiracy, now I'm starting to go, that might have been true because everything else is true exactly so romans 13 1 through 3 says let every soul be subject to the governing authorities for there is no authority except from god we fall under god what god says we do and the authorities that exist are appointed by god therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of god and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves if you break the law you're going to jail okay that's what that's referring to you can't steal like all of the looting that's going on, you have to obey the law of the land.

And it says do not steal. Like it also says in the state of Florida that you're breaking the law if you wear a mask. A lot of people wore masks. That's a governing authority. That's a rule of law. No one should have had a mask on. I didn't wear a mask. Guess why?

Because I don't break the law. I don't know. For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to evil. Do you want to be unafraid of the authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same. So basically that is don't break the laws of the land. There was no law that says that we must mask. There was no law that said that we had to vaccinate. And even if there was, I would not have done it because that's not what I go by. I go by the Constitution, and the Constitution says that the church has a right to assemble. And I'm going to take that.

The Constitution exceeds all of that nonsense. I'm going to take it. The Constitution exceeds all of that nonsense. I'm going to take it. That's the way it goes. And anybody else who doesn't, you're not the restraining. And whatever will be, will be for you. Que sera, sera. I don't play by that. Okay.

So those scriptures are not conflicting. But I'm going to tell you, because when you break down the scripture, Romans 31, 1 through 3, or 13, 1 through 3, this is very interesting. So it's not conflicting what Peter said and then what Paul said in Romans. It's not conflicting. So when it says be subject to, it's a significant theme. Governing authorities is the civil rulers, all of whom were probably pagans at the time Paul was writing. Christians may have been tempted not to submit to them

out of loyalty to Christ. But Paul is encouraging Christians to be good citizens as long as it doesn't conflict with their allegiance to Christ. That's what the scripture is breaking down when you read verse one. Has nothing to do, not one thing to do with caving to COVID and things like that. Climate change. It's got nothing to do with that. If it goes against your allegiance to Jesus Christ, which all of that did, you don't do it. 13.3 says, but people don't break down the scriptures.

They just read the Bible instead of breaking it down and finding out what it exactly says. It says, do what is right and you will be commended. Paul is not stating that this will always be true, but is describing the proper ideal function of rulers. When civil rulers overstep their proper function, the Christian is to obey God rather than the human authorities. That's what the Bible says.

That's what, when you break down the words, Greek, Hebrew, and you study it out, that came from the study Bible portion of the Bible. But nobody did that. They just read it verbatim without studying it out, and then they just succumbed. It was way easier. It was easier to just read that out and say, you know what, we're going to just do that. Because then they look like, again, good neighbors and community partners. They were going to face nothing like what this church faced, which was hate.

Well, like people wanted to kill us. Like literally people were wanting acts of violence to come out against us. People were wishing us dead. I mean, it was pretty crazy some of the things that were being said. The place that we were renting at the time, they were calling our landlord and trying to pressure them to shut us down. I found that out like almost a year later. But she said, yeah, I was getting phone calls that were angry and quite. She was concerned about her violence against herself, you know, and

the building. But she was like, I didn't feel right about closing you down. That's where when you pray over, we didn't own the place. So we prayed over our landlords and we asked for favor with them all the time. That's where that comes in, having favor with them. So don't read the Bible, study the Bible. That's all I can say. I say it all the time. It's the most important thing that you can do. Don't just read it, study it. Let me see.

Oh, this is one note that I wanted. I wanted to make sure I hit all my notes. So this is what I thought was hilarious, especially with all the Romans 13 people. I literally am so glad nobody came to me face to face and said, well, what about Romans 13? I might have physically hurt them. I mean, I got so sick of hearing, well, what about Romans 13? I got so sick of that.

Or you're wrong because Romans 13 tells us. I got so sick of hearing that nonsense because they were ignorant. But these are the very same people that if you would have asked them six months prior to give money for bibles to go to china they would have given you at least a dollar but in china they don't have a constitution so the very missionaries that we would have been sending the bibles to the underground missionaries would have been breaking the law which they don't have a constitution right they would have been breaking the law, which they don't have a constitution. They would have been breaking the law. They would have been supporting them in breaking the law and helping them potentially to be murdered, killed, or put in prison.

And they were okay with that. Totally okay with that. But with COVID, can't do it. And you know why that is? Because as long as it's someone else doing it, going against the grain, they're okay with it because they're not the one at risk. But with COVID, people had to put themselves out there. And people would, you know, get yell at them,

potentially if they weren't wearing a mask, if they weren't six-foot distancing. They were going to get their coworkers were going to get teed off at them. Their environment that they were going to be could be very volatile or harsh. And let's not disrupt our lifestyle to stand up for truth. Can't do that. But we'll let somebody else do that. And we'll support them in that.

It's crap, people. That's all I'm going to say about that. It's ignorance, stupidity, frustrating, and crap. That's all I got to say. Now let's win some people to Jesus. I like your ring. Are you not able to wear your wedding bands anymore, Logan? No. Logan, show everybody your tummy. So people can see it that don't come to the church. Stand up, Logan, really quick. Logan's blowing up like a balloon.

Come on, girl. Stand up. Show them your belly. It looks like a paper mache. You know how you put a balloon in a paper mache? Back up. That's what it looks like. She's getting bigger. She's getting bigger. There's a balloon in a paper mache? Back up. That's what it looks like. She's getting bigger.

She's getting bigger. I love it. It's just the beginning. Prayed that baby in. If you don't know Jesus as your Lord and Savior, I invite you to do that right now. If you've walked away and you need to get your life right, today's your day. Just say this prayer do that right now. If you've walked away and you need to get your life right, today's your day. Just say this prayer with me right now.

Heavenly Father, I come to you right now. I thank you for what you did on that cross. I thank you for the forgiveness of sin. I repent of my sin. I will live for you. I ask you to be the Lord of my life. Use me, mold me, make me into the person that you've called me to be. In Jesus' mighty name we pray. Amen. We will see you tomorrow night. Hey, listen, I'm doing the podcast on Friday. It doesn't matter that there's a conference going on.

I'm doing it. All right. We'll be here. Did you not on. I'm doing it. All right. We'll be here. Did you not know that I'm doing it? I did. I just was like, well. I told you. I'm doing it. So be here.

We'll have some highlights from the conference. Okay. I'm going to make Tracy work real hard. We're going to have some highlights from the conference. If you can be here, be here. Listen, I don't care. Take Allegiant. Punta Gorda is right down the road. You can get be here, be here. Listen, I don't care. Take Allegiant. Punta Gorda is right down the road. You can get a quick flight down here. We have a Hampton Inn real close.

Call Logan. She'll pick you up. There you go. Airport service. Don't call Logan. No, make your way. Make your way. Make your way down here. Be here here you don't want to miss it it's going to be a great time lots of laughs lots of fun we'll feed your face listen christians know how to eat and we're eating here every night every morning that's how we roll so be here and and if you can't well tune in tomorrow night everything's on hope hotline Every last thing. And then from that point on, the rest of the conference will be on the Foundation Church media sites. And then I'll see you Friday. Have a great day. See you then.

Bye. Real Talk. Real talk. Real talk. Real talk.