The Hope Hotline - The Hope Hotline | S02-E70 | 11-05-2024

Episode Date: November 6, 2024

The Hope Hotline | S02-E70 | 11-05-2024

This is the best freaking Wednesday I have seen in a really long time. Go. The YMCA. It's fun to stay at the... Thanksgiving is never going to look better. Best Thanksgiving ever. We're going to have the best Christmas ever. There he is.

Ever. There he is. It's Christmas. Today it's Christmas. All over the world. All over the world. It's Christmas. It's Christmas. I'm sure all of them are super happy about this.

All over the world they are. I can't contain myself. I can't contain myself. The day is brighter, the sun is shining. Well, it's time. Through the clouds. The sun is shining. Well, it's time. It's actually great. Through the clouds. Yeah. I can see it. The sun is definitely better.

I'm so happy. It's Christmas all over the world. All over the world. All over the world. All over the world. Nobody can stand it. In the rooms, they're dancing. Look at them dancing.

In the rooms. Yeah. In the bathrooms. In the bathrooms. They are literally dancing all over the world. It's like they made up these dances just for the day. Because Trump has become president of the United States. It's like January, whatever that day is.

Yeah, in the driveways, they're dancing. Look at them. Yep. Look at them. Woo-hoo! In the living rooms. Coming in hot. Yeah, that's right.

Yeah. That's right. All right. Yep, that's right. It's Christmas all over the world, people. It's Christmas all over the world, people. It's Christmas all over the world. I know, for a fact. Okay, if this hadn't gone our way,

I would still be okay today. I wouldn't feel like I do right now, but I would still be okay because Jesus is Lord and God is my protector. But I'm going to tell you right now, I told you guys, I had a feeling. I wasn't sure. But when his life got spared those three times, I'm like, I know. That didn't just happen.

Like God doesn't just do that to be like, now you're going to lose. Right. I mean, that would have made absolutely no sense whatsoever. I meant to have you pull up something for me. I'm going to look for it really quick. I have this one too. Oh, I forgot about that. I did too.

Oh my gosh. Ding dong. The witch is dead. Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and Wink and I don't really care. Ding dong. The witch is dead. I don't care. Coming in hot. That's right.

That's right. So I'm going to send this to you really quick. Okay. Because I am. This is. This is. I also meant to send this to you, Tracy, because I want this. I'm going to have you download this because I don't know if a lot of people know this.

I think this is the one. If it's not, I can stop you really quick. But so I would have been okay. I mean, all of us would have been okay. I mean, all of us would have been okay. But it is amazing how righteously, when you get vindicated righteously, like how it makes you feel like how important your prayers, how important your life. Like Norma, literally, I texted Norma last night, because Tom did it. Tom and Aaron and Will did the podcast, which I was here too. But

they did the podcast all the way until after Trump's speech. And I texted Norma and I said, how happy are you? And she goes, I feel like I have a life. A future. I feel like my life has a future now. Which is super sad. But Vanessa, what did you say about your kids this morning? Well, my kids fell asleep. They did not stay up.

And so I woke them up with the news. And they were both so excited. Emma even did like a little happy dance. Like half asleep. How old are your kids? Her eyes and she did a happy dance. My kids are 14 and 15. Can you like seriously think about that? Yeah. That your kids, that it's that important because the trajectory of this, of this country was not going well. Right. And now it reminds me of back in biblical times, if you look at 1 Kings, 2 Kings, and then Chronicles is also is a reflection of 1 and 2 Kings. It basically says the same thing. It just chronologically puts them in order. But

if you look at that, there are many times that the Israelites would cry out to the Lord because they had had a succession of horrible kings. They were evil and they were just evil. And the harm that they were causing, order in the court, thank you so much. Order in the court. Thank you so much. Order in the court told me that she was going to do that. Thank you, order in the court. I appreciate that. We love you, too. Yeah. We love you.

Thank you for giving. So it's funny because you look at what the people would do. The Jewish people would cry out to the Lord, and then he would give them a reprieve, and then they would have a good king come in. And I I literally was like that's what he did for us amen that's exactly what he did for us and I'm so grateful for that yeah um but again like Trump is not our savior no no but he believes in everything we do and the thoughts of the unborn being with us winning the Senate and the House. That is huge.

I mean, that is huge. And the thoughts of the unborn being spared and saved. That right there is worth everything else. If he didn't do anything else. But that's not the case. I mean, he's going to reprieve so many things economically for people because people are having a very tough time putting food on the table. Yes, correct.

And so for that, I am grateful. Like economically, but social issues, he agrees with us. I vote on social issues. I don't vote on financial because God always, he's my provider. So I don't worry about that stuff. Social issues, though, that's how I vote. Biblically speaking, and that's how we all should vote. The Democrats, that's the reason why they stick together like glue.

They don't normally vote. Back in the day, the blue dog Democrats voted on economic issues. They actually were, their social issues were conservative issues. They stood on the side of right for life. Like if Robert F. Kennedy were to run today,

he would look like a conservative because his issues were, he didn't want war. Everything that we are, that's how he would look like Trump. Really. Because Trump is borderline. I mean mean he's been a democrat forever and then he became a republican oh i didn't know that yep he was a democrat yep he switched but like you said the democrats of then are just completely

different right completely different the old blue dog democrats yeah have their party has left them behind and they sit there and go i don't even recognize them because they're socialists now yeah they're socialists so it's uh it's pretty crazy but it's a beautiful day life is good life is so good and i'm very very happy i was talking to kristin on the way here uh or what um not on the way here while i was getting ready and stuff like that and i said to her how happy are you because all of the all of the 20 early 20 somethings or the 20 somethings all did a watch party they didn't all do a watch party but some of them got together

to do a watch party yeah and they all stayed up until after it was over because is that think about that how important like back in the day i mean i lived in dc so politics was very important right i grew up where politics were important in my in our household but most of my friends yeah they didn't care right they're like my vote won't matter right true that is something people said a lot oh my gosh not today though nobody thinks like that today which thank god but i was telling you guys it's like brinley uh heather came over um to uh for me i printed out something i printed out the electoral college so that brinley this is like us how important it is

for us with our kids it's like she was coloring in each country or each country, each state as it was one. So she could count the electoral college. Right. That's how it starts. People train up your child because I watched the view today and the view. Oh, I wanted to watch. Oh, they were trying to be like they were they were sore losers. Don't get me wrong. But they were trying to take the high road because they weren't like conservatives were last last election where they're not going to be the ones to say that they were stolen from because you know it was a fair election and it was just it was a puke fest to be honest with you a complete puke fest how but joy was saying how she was a former teacher joy bahar and we need to be teaching kids as early as kindergarten about being, about social issues, about being your own thinkers,

and that, like, all this stuff that parents are teaching their kids, they need to be told that, she didn't phrase it like this, but they need to be to they need to think for themselves they need to be taught to think for themselves starting at a very early age and also social media there needs to be some responsibility for social media because everything that was being talked about liberal wise and the conservatives had their own, you know, refute to it, that that needs to be shut down because we were wrong.

And I'm like, who's to say? Like, why can't I shut you down then? Exactly. She needs to go somewhere. Oh my gosh. Far away. Far, far away. I'm so glad she's not teaching anymore.

Thank God. I know. But the problem is, is if you look at colleges 90 of them are all liberal and they're all have a liberal agenda high school is really no different that's why homeschooling your kids is really super important because or teaching your kids at a very young age that biblical, the Bible principles, that you do vote on social issues, but the social issues are based on the Bible, and you teach them to be their own thinker and not to follow whatever a teacher says

or whatever the propaganda is being put out in the school system because that is really dangerous. Yep, sure is. Really dangerous. Do you have that thing? It's almost ready. It's down. It's in the cloud. Oh, sure is. Really dangerous. Do you have that thing? It's almost ready. It's in the cloud. Oh, cool.

It's in the cloud. I stayed awake until 1230. I had my phone in my bed watching Pastor Tom, and then I fell asleep. And then I woke up at 124, and I looked, and I was kind of scrolled real quick, didn't see anything. And then I was like, whatever, they're not going to call it tonight. There was such a lull for so long. I, whatever, they're not going to call it tonight. Like there was so much such a lull for so long. I'm like, they're not going to call it. So I fell asleep and I got a text message.

I woke up in the morning, but I had a text message from Jared 134. I missed it by like 10 minutes, but I would never have been able to go back to sleep. So to wake up to like he won. It was a wild way to wake up. It really was. It was so good. You don't want to know what time I went to sleep. 8.30 really was. It was so good. You don't want to know what time I went to sleep. 8.30.

No. I'm not a monster. She does care. 7.30 then. It was 7.30 then. I tried my best. I even deep cleaned my refrigerator as I was watching just to keep my eyes open. 10.30. I went to bed really late

for you. Aren't you proud of me? I know I pushed it. I pushed it last night and I went to bed just like, Lord, whatever the outcome is, you are crisis King. You know what I mean? And so I was like, I'm going to wake up to great news i just knew it i went to sleep perfect peace and then i woke up to the best news and i did my own little happy dance in the morning yeah i you know what the thing is this is just crazy i made decisions i was like no matter what i am not being going to be anxious about right about this at all right right because there's no there's no reason to be anxious right so i was chill but tom kept saying he goes they're gonna call it tonight because when he started when he

saw florida at 10 points yeah tom tom basically was like he's winning yeah when he saw the floor i mean and tom was super confident he pretty much knew he's like once i saw certain things i was like it's a done deal there's no going back yeah so i do wish i was up to see when pennsylvania was called yeah because that was a big one that was a big one yeah i know yeah it's crazy it really is it's crazy so i think i found the right one but um i'm pretty sure i did if not'm going to pull it down really quick. Super sorry. But a lot of people have never heard this prophecy. I don't go by a lot of prophets.

I'll be honest with you because a lot of them I just am not a big fan in. This is one that I have paid attention to. Kim Clement, who passed away, I think it was just before trump took office or just after he took office it's one of the two i think it might have been before i don't know if he ever saw it i don't i feel like he didn't so kim clement in 2000 way before he ever went down the elevator it was early 2000s he prophetically said that Trump would run for office and then he would serve two times. He would do two terms in office. Or he would win twice.

One of the things. One of it. I don't know. I will listen to it. I can't remember. I feel like he said he would serve two terms. But it also says that he would come in a man that was a worldly man, but he would come out, he would be a praying man when he left. Well, that didn't happen the first term.

But one of the things I've always held on to was this prophecy, because, and Tom and I have talked about it many times, if it was a true prophecy and he was actually a true prophet, then this would come to pass and i said to tom when he lost the um the last time i was like well actually i don't know if kim clement actually said he would serve for four years or that he would just win and um which he did but it was stolen from him but, and I haven't listened to this since then, so we'll find out what he actually said. But regardless, actually his prophecy is very accurate.

It's 2024. This was early 2000s when he prophetically spoke this, and it's come to pass. So play this prophecy for me, for everybody. Shall take place. Shall be the most unusual thing. A transfiguration. A going into the marketplace, if you wish,

into the news media, where Time Magazine will have no choice but to say what I want them to say. This is him saying the Lord is saying this. What I want to say. The view. What I want to say. Trump shall become a trumpet, says the Lord.

Trump shall become a trumpet. I will raise up the Trump to become a trumpet. And Bill Gates to open up the gate of a financial realm for the church. I will not forget 9-11. I will not forget what took place that day. And I will not forget the gatekeeper that watched over New York. Who will once again stand and watch over this nation. Says the Spirit of God.

It shall come to pass that the man that i place in the highest office shall go in whispering my name but god said when he enters into the office he will be shouting out by the power of the spirit for i shall fill him with my spirit when he goes into office and there will be a praying man in the highest seat in your there will be a praying president not a religious one but i will fool the people says the lord i will fool the people yes i will god says the one that is chosen shall go in and they shall say he has hot blood for the spirit of god says yes he may have hot blood but he will bring the walls of protection on this country in a greater way and the economy

of this country shall change rapidly says the lord of hosts listen to the word of the lord god says i will put at your helm for two terms a president that will pray but he will not be a praying president when he starts. I will put him in office, and then I will baptize him with the Holy Spirit, and my power says the Lord of hosts. Come on! Actually, from what I understand,

and I don't know how true this is, but recently a pastor met with President Trump, I believe it was last year, and he was filled with the Spirit. Interesting. So if that is true, he was filled with tongues. So we'll just see. There's been never a president

who's allowed more pastors in to lay hands on him and to pray over him. Very true. And if there ain't a man that's hot blooded, I mean, if you look at that prophecy, it's pretty astounding how that works. So Kim Clement, you done good. I wish she was alive to see it,

but he's in heaven looking down and he knows what's right. So pretty amazing. 2007. Yeah. And Trump didn't even go down the escalators until I think it was 2016. Yeah. So that's pretty wild.

Very wild. Yeah. So God knows what he's doing. Yep. No matter what. Oh, yeah. But don't follow a lot of, a lot of people follow prophets.

They listen to a lot of stuff and um you should be very very careful about that um they need to have if people have looked at what kim clement has have prophesied and um i mean statistically speaking uh people have taken what his prophetic words have been and how many have come to pass. And it's outrageous the number of prophecies that he has spoken that actually came to pass. Those are the people you pay attention to. You need to look. And for me, I have looked at that. I mean, you can look. You literally can look up his name and you can.

I don't remember how you look it up. I shouldn't say how I did it because I I can't remember, because it was so long ago. But you can literally look him up and say, basically say how many of his prophecies have come to pass. It lists the prophecies that he spoke, and then I believe when and the date and when they happened. Yeah, prophecyindex.org says there's 40 prophecies and there's 56 sources next to it that you can click on that said what he prophesied came to pass correct yeah it says a worldwide

pre-tribulation end of age harvest and revival and then it's a source one that you can click on and then it opens up like where it is click to view the url yeah so and people before you listen to a prophet you really should check them out. Yeah. Yep. Because a lot of people get led astray. Absolutely. And it's a dangerous thing. So, today is December 25th in my mind.

That's right. I'm one happy chick. Vanessa's got her house already decorated for Christmas. Yeah. Are you ready? Correct? Absolutely. I should be going like this. Christmas lights are coming up on Monday.

Outside. You're not having to put them up. You found somebody. Yes, from the church. You didn't even know that was a thing. No. It's a beautiful thing. It is a beautiful thing.

Tom loves it. He hates it, but he loves it while he's getting eaten by mosquitoes. Yeah. I got a guy. If you need a guy, he does. He doesn't want a guy. He wants to do it. My guy wants a guy. Tom enjoys it.

Yeah. Except for the mosquito part. He enjoys it. So, but I saw this on Instagram and I think you shared it with me, Tracy. But it says, think about this. If Trump won in 2020, he would have had a Democrat House and Senate. More impeachments, no Senate confirmations, no bills passed and possibly the end of MAGA. But now he has the House, the Senate, Supreme Court, and a popular vote mandate, and an entire country that wants to clean up our elections,

close our borders, deport illegals, and hold corrupt politicians accountable. Sometimes I think it had to happen this way. Oh, yeah. It did have to happen. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. God knows what he's doing yes but did you notice the chemical mint talked about how he'll protect our our walls yeah i mean you know nailed it nailed it and there's one that's longer than that it's like five minutes long it goes a little bit more in detail. But I picked the shorter one because I was pretty sure that one was the right one.

But listen, it's pretty amazing. It really is. And he even prophesied that he would be, Kim Clement even prophesied that his life would be, that someone would try and take his life. Yep. Oh, wow. I remember that. Yep. So pretty wild. Very. So the prayers, wow. I remember that. Yep. So pretty wild.

Very. So the prayers don't stop. Like we have to pray. Right. Pray a hedge of protection around him. Over his family. And him.

100%. And J.D. Vance. 100%. J.D. Vance's family is actually pastors under the River Church. His brother is. And i know his wife and they are very very sweet people but his his family jd vance's family and then like his mother

and then his siblings they all need because he they lost the dad but they all need prayer and hedge protection. I remember back in, um, when I lived in DC, when George, uh, W Bush was in office, his brother lived right around the corner from me and that he had secret service outside his house. And I don't know if that'll be the case for family members, but it's crazy world and they need a hedge of protection around them. And they're just. I forgot to text her. And say congratulations. But I'll do that after the podcast.

Good call. Yeah. I mean, we need to like be. Like Vanessa said. We need to be mindful of them and their families. And a hedge of protection around them. Because that's not good right yeah so great day people today's a great stinking day it depends who you talk to that's true that's true because my girls

told me they're seeing some funny stuff on their instagram oh really norma said some people are having meltdowns oh yeah complete meltdown yeah they're Yeah, they think like it's time. Now it's like this era where like it's like Handmaid Tales. Have you heard of that series before? Never. Basically, it was like this country. It's Canada or it's actually technically America. And they got overturned. And so now there's this elitist.

And then all of the women that they're married to can't have babies. And so they have all these other women that are fertile. And so they have to be helping the husbands repopulate and they can't keep the child. So they get pregnant and then they have to give the baby to the to the elite family. And so on my Instagram this morning, I was following somebody that like does home stuff and she was wearing the hands made tail outfits. And she said POV point of view of all women on November 6th. So this is like their brains like this is what they think is happening now. Fully convinced we're going to like, I mean, that is like as brainwashed as you can be like that. That series is pretty rough.

Yeah. So to like literally compare it. Well, you know that Sonny, whatever her name's on the view, she had to correct herself. But one of the things that she said is uneducated women voted for Trump. Oh yeah.

And she had to correct herself. I meant women who didn't have college education. Oh, wow. What if you have some college education? Does that count? I mean, I have a college education. I know a lot of women who are college educated that voted for him

because they were smart enough not to be so stupid to vote for her. I'm a Democrat, like, nightmare. You are. I'm a woman. I know. And on top of that, I'm Puerto Rican. I know. And a college education that, I'm Puerto Rican. I know.

And a college education. And a college education. Wow. I need to like be banished. Yeah, you are a big disappointment to the Democratic side of things. Because they just count on you like there's no tomorrow. The bread and butter was buttered on the wrong side. The thing is, is I will say this.

In order for there to be no real retribution of any kind, in order for her to have to concede, it had to be that he won the popular vote. Yeah, yeah. Otherwise, she was going to probably fight it. She can't fight this. At 4 o'clock, she's supposed to be giving her concession speech, which will be done at 4 o'clock, trust me,

so everybody can watch the concession speech. But in order for that to happen, like he had to win the popular vote and to shut up all these pundits and everything else there's nothing they can say they can't say we need to get rid of the electoral college because it doesn't work because that's what they normally do right that's their go-to move it really should be the popular vote okay it is the popular vote and the electoral college pound sand yep you got nothing to say the country has spoken that's one of the things that the people on the view did have to admit they cannot argue that the world has

spoken i mean the the united states has spoken the people of the united states have spoken we want all of them out of every every office from house to Senate to President. Yeah, Supreme Court is two positions. So there's really three positions that should be coming up and be available. They probably won't because Clarence Thomas is 76, which I'm a big Clarence Thomas fan. So, I mean, but at a certain age. Right.

You should be turning things over. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, that's, oh gosh, I can't pronounce it. It's A-I-U-T-O. I-A-O. I believe it is. That's good. Um, 78.

Wow. Mm-hmm. And then there's one other one,8-O, I believe it is. Sounds good. 78. Wow. Mm-hmm. And then there's one other one, and I don't remember who that is, and that's, they're older, and they're all old, and he'll probably replace them. But it would be ideal if he replaced the two liberals.

We keep Clarence Thomas. Yeah. And then we can really set the stage for ourselves. Let's do it. Because last time he put in four, but he I'm not really happy with who he chose. Coney Barrett and

what's his face? The white guy. He's younger. They've not voted well for us at two different occasions so not real impressed with them more than two I think but whatever so all right do your thing okay and then you can make it pretty fast just run through that really fast and then we'll get on with the questions okay sounds good all right so we've got um a good amount of people on Facebook today so hey guys welcome back I don know why, cause it just told us that they

were going to shut down our, um, our live. Oh, did they? Uh, so yeah, our Facebook, we said that it was the live was about to be shut down and I just said, stay live and it worked. So we're live and we've got a lot of people watching on Facebook. Got a lot of people on rumble today. You guys know we were here to celebrate, um, and YouTube. Hey, guys. Everybody's here today. So that's awesome. So you know that we love Rumble. So if you're watching on a different platform, jump over to Rumble. We'll make sure the link is there for you guys. And then later on today, the audio podcast will be available. If you have a friend that likes to listen instead, you can always send them that. I already saw a question over on Foundation Church's page. It was a pretty in-depth question. So please send that over and

then I'll share that with Hope and then we'll see if we can get that answered for you. It'll be a little bit much for today, so we'll make sure we have all the resources and stuff for you guys. But yeah, send that over, askhopeathopehotline.com. and we've got our merch available and our store online but also in our merch store at church so wherever you are you can find our Hope Hotline merch and just a reminder on Friday we will not be here. I will be

celebrating my 40th birthday so just a reminder no podcast but we will be back on Wednesday and that is it. Quick and to the point. Hot diggity, sister. Yeah.

Love it. It's Norma's birthday with you. I know. My little birthday buddy. I know. I love that. You guys share the same birthday. I love it so much. Yeah.

It helps me remember your birthday. There you go. Otherwise, I might be all jacked up. I would care less, but that's okay. I know. I'll tell you. Big happy birthday to you though, sister. Thank you.

She won't even be here on Sunday for us to celebrate her. I know. Listen, I'm hiding. Did you guys have fun on your birthdays? Some of their friends threw them a big birthday bash. Was that nice? It was super cute. I hate surprises.

I think it's so stupid because then everybody has to be secretive. And it's like, oh, nobody talks about it. And so I hate that. And then you have to walk into a room and they're like, oh, surprise. And I hate that. It's like my least favorite thing. So then we show up and they're all in the room waiting to say. Surprise, surprise.

I don't know what they were going to say. So Tracy took one for the team. I did. I walked through the door first. And I was like, no way. I had no idea you guys were here. Did they honestly believe that? No, no, no. They didn't.

But they wanted to be sweet. They were. And you guys are all so sweet. You really are. You're the best people ever. If you're friends with you, then on Instagram, if anybody that's watching this that doesn't know anybody, you should probably put our handles on there

so people can follow on Instagram. I'm so fun. You are fun. But yeah, if you go on, if you be friends on really your Instagrammers, you're not Facebookers. Yeah.

Yeah. So if you want to know them, like if you want to get to know them and see what their lives are like so that you can find me on snap too. Oh, okay. I'm dropping her snap on, on the too. Ooh. Okay. Dropping her snap on,

on the tip. I mean, I'm pretty. Sometimes when you're watching people, it's, it's more fun if you really know who they are. Oh yeah, absolutely. I mean,

plenty of pictures from the party on there. If you want to, yeah, if you want to find me, it's just my name. And so is Vanessa's. So Tracy Carothers. And with a C.

Yeah. C A R U T H E R S. With a C. Yeah, C-A-R-U-T-H-E-R-S. And then Vanessa Tamas. T-A-M-A-S. Talia. Yep, yep. Angelo. No.

No, she doesn't go by that. Yours is like Tal. It is? That's not your username. Are you sure? I don't think that's true. I didn't think it was that. Wow.

I knew that. I totally knew that. I did not know that. Talia, I knew it. I feel like it's true. I didn't think it was that. Wow. I knew that. I totally knew that. I did not know that. Oh, yeah. I knew it. I feel like it's Tao. Is that the right one? Or is that a fake one?

Okay. I didn't think it was that either, though. It's how much we pay attention. Oh, that's, yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah, that's your good one. That's your cute one.

Okay, fine. Anyways, so yeah. But I'll make a little graphic. Yeah, follow us. Instagram is my love language. Okay, fine. Anyways, so yeah, but I'll make a little graphic. Yeah, follow us. Instagram is my love language. I have Facebook. I don't have Facebook, but. I'm not the greatest at Facebook.

I've gotten way, I'm more of an Instagrammer now because I'll be honest with you. That's where your videos are. You're what bangs. Oh, that's true. Yes. That's where your viewing is.

That's true. Yeah. I literally, that's so true. Oh my where your viewing is. That's true. Literally, that's so true. Oh my gosh. I was watching mukbangs while the political thing's going on. Oh, I can imagine. I was. I was watching eating. I was like, what's wrong with me?

But yeah, I was chilled. And I wasn't stressed. When Tommy's fight, I was watching mukbangs because I was stressed. And I wasn't stressed. Now, in Tommy's fight, I was watching Mugbanks because I was stressed. You were coping. Definitely coping. It was hard. But yeah, for me, I'm an Instagrammer now. You know why?

Because Instagram is not gossipy. No, it's just fun. It is. I mean, you still got the people who are trying to prove that their love is better than everybody else's and like they have a better relationship than everybody else and they're more in love than anybody else and you know

like everybody should have the kind of relationship that they have it's usually less words though so you can just be like yes like Facebook you're like what did they say and you have to like read it all and you're like especially if they use ai oh especially if they're if they're jeff tamas and use ai to share his undying love for his wife yes not yes to that yes facebook is way worse it is way worse and people just like when they get mad at each other, they're on there paying each other back.

There's so much drama. Or breaking up with their boyfriend or spouse. Then it's like my love is stronger than anybody breaking it. And I'm like, what? Does that even mean? It never makes sense. Or whatever they're eating, they want to share it. You don't get a lot of that on Instagram.

That's why I've left Facebook and gone to Instagram because the crap is far less and it's way quicker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is. Way quicker. And people on Instagram

just really want to be, just really want to have fun. Yeah, and you're just sharing. You're just laughing, having a good time. Yeah, just sharing what's going on. Whereas Facebook is more about you want what I have.

Yeah. And I want you to know why you want what I have. And I want you to know why you want what I have. And I want all the likes that I possibly can get. It's just ridiculous behavior. I can't do it. I really can't do it. I mean, we all literally go.

Whenever I see that, I really question. Even people that I love. I know. Even people that I love, when I see like how many times they post about each other i'm like are you in trouble are you okay is that yeah is your relationship having issues i know yeah okay hey speaking of the first question that is true holy crap what a great transition

great we know what we're doing here most professional podcast most unprofessional podcast on the planet but that's good and that's okay um okay so this is the first question i need to improve the communication with my husband lately it feels like we've been missing each other and i want to strengthen our connection. I've noticed that discussions can sometimes lead to misunderstandings or frustration, which makes it hard to express our feelings openly. Yeah, when you're having to defend yourself,

or you can't speak openly, yeah. Or you can't, well, I'll keep going. Any tips on how to create a more supportive dialogue would be really helpful. This is like so common in marriages. Communication is one of the biggest problems in marriages that there is. Finances, communication, and growing apart.

But growing apart oftentimes happens from lack of communication would you not agree girls absolutely 100 so what i did is i made a list and it's what causes this now ladies tracy at any moment that you guys want to add in just flip yourself on okay okay because i'm going to break down each one of these which will cause you guys to want to probably chime in. Now, here's the thing. Vanessa and her husband do a lot of our marital counseling at the church. Okay, so the reason they do that is because they've been in ministry, but also because they know what causes marriages to go bad.

Because, again, they've been in ministry. So they've watched the downer. People think, like kid you not, like people think it's really one way. It is not that way. So, ugh. So, but anytime you guys want to chime in or just keep yourselves on.

I'll leave us on. Yeah, okay. And I won't know when I want to go. And even Talia, like you can chime in. I know you're not married, but if you will say, well, what do you, why do you think this is or whatever, feel free. So my first one is, and these are my opinion guys, just based on like previous or past experience. like previous or past experience,

like everybody wants to go on their past experiences for health and wealth and prosperity. Right. Yep. Well, I'm going to go on my past experiences on this people because that's what I have. Not necessarily with Tom and me, just watching relationship after relationship go right into the toilet. So the first one is being defensive. When you are in a relationship with somebody, from dating all the way to being married,

one of the biggest things that people do when they're having to communicate things that puts them in vulnerable positions is they become extremely defensive. Would you agree? Absolutely. When you become defensive, you now shut down all kinds of communication because there are places that you will not go. Because you're afraid if you go there or if somebody goes there with you, then there'll be responsibility having to be taken and all like what you're trying to communicate to the person about them taking responsibility for their action is diverted back to you so most of the time people are not in the offensive mode which is really what you should do when you go into any kind of communication about whether it's an argument,

whether it's how to deal with the finances, from how to deal with your children. Most people shut down because they want it their way. Or if the person goes, you're wrong because of this, now they're defensive. Or if you say to a person, when you do this, I don't like it because of this, right? And then the person that you're saying that to now goes, well, when you do this, you do this, and it might not even be the same topic. So now it's opening a can of worms that instead of sticking to the one topic, because one person becomes defensive, now you're making the other person become defensive. Now we're talking about a whole nother thing.

Women are famous for this. We're elephants. We remember everything. And when our husbands come to us and say, and I'm not saying it's always the case, but when our husbands come to us and want to talk to about an issue, maybe it's child rearing, right? Like maybe he sees something like for me when Tommy was very small, I was not the greatest at discipline.

Like when he was six months to two, I wasn't really that great at it because I just it broke my heart to like spank and i did spank but not like i should have and it and i wasn't the strong disciplinarian i should have been because he was just so dang cute i'm shocked i can't i couldn't bear it oh i was so shocked tommy owned me i heard that but i still thought like yeah he owned me like he heard that, but I still thought, like, yeah. He owned me. Like, when we were in the house, he was good. Okay. When we left the house, he was a freaking nightmare.

That's the truth. When I say people saw us coming up the driveway to go to mom's group, they'd be like, oh, crap. not you why i wish they weren't coming well that i don't blame them i wished i wasn't coming and eventually i stopped going because he was a nightmare and tom would say to me okay listen like you're not doing this right and you this is how you need to do it. And he was absolutely right. And I became defensive because I didn't want to take responsibility for what I wasn't doing.

But then life gets to a place, like he hit too, and I was like, I can't live like this. This is like freaking horrible. This is a nightmare. So he went away for a ski vacation. I got James Dobson's book, Dare to Discipline, and it radically changed my life, along with The Spoon, all in one weekend.

I should have been listening to Tom, but I was very defensive about, he, he, for some reason, and I've seen dads, their kids own the dad. Like the dad tells the kid to do something and that kid just looks at him,

laughs and keeps on going. So it doesn't, it isn't because he was a guy. It's because when Tom said something, Tommy knew he meant it. Right. When I said something, Tommy was like, whatevs, and kept on, right? Not in the house, because Tom was home normally.

Or in the house, he was just more confined, and he was just a good boy in the house. I don't know why, but normally he did what I wanted. It took somebody else telling me, which was wrong, because I should have not been defensive with Tom. We, women by nature, including myself,

will deflect. Well, you do that because, do you know what I'm saying? That's not a great way to communicate. That's not a great way to have open conversation. When you're talking about a specific topic, leave it to only that topic. And don't become so defensive that when the person's trying

to, if the person is not trying to be critical, but they're giving you constructive criticism, listen to them, especially if it's your spouse, because they love you more than anybody. They want you to be successful. You guys want to add anything to that? No, I think that's really good. And I do think that's usually the issue is that, and I think it all like stems from like, you probably didn't want to disappoint Pastor Tom. Like you're probably like, felt like you were disappointing him by like. No, it was my pride. No, I didn't care that I was disappointing him at that moment I cared way more about Tommy

and like having to spank him because I didn't want to do that which I did do it but the spankings were kind of a joke to be perfectly honest with you and like he ruled me he owned me

and it stopped it too and then like by three, that kid was like stellar. He was stellar. But it wasn't because of Tom. Okay. Now I literally was like, he's wrong, he's wrong, he's wrong.

And my pride got in the way. Listen, I am not, I'm still a prideful person person i don't want to make it sound like i have no pride i do have pride but i my pride is like minuscule in comparison like i was a super prideful person okay like i could you could barely get an i'm sorry out of me right yeah i'm not like that at all i am night and day from the human being that I used to be, as well as everybody should be. Nobody should be the same.

Everybody should be moving where they look like Jesus. But you have to be honest about yourself. Yeah. And that's the honest to God truth. And it was total pride. Interesting. 100%. Very different than now.

Very different. Yeah. Interesting. Because I know some people will like, they feel like they're letting people down and maybe not you, but I do know somebody very specific that's coming to my mind that they react

and it doesn't make sense because it's like you're trying to like help them, but they're reacting out of like anger. But really when you ask them later on, once they've calmed down, they're like, well, I just didn't want to disappoint you. I didn't want to do this. I didn't want, like, I didn't want you to think I wasn't

able to. But that's pride too. Yeah. A hundred percent. That's pride. Yeah, absolutely. And so I just, I think it's very interesting. So if you could just in the moment, like pause, like you were saying, and not refuse to get defensive, refuse to get offended. It's a very hard thing to do, but like, it's something that I've had to tell myself, like, I'm just, I'm going to refuse to get offended. I'm going to refuse. I'm going to sit in it. And it, like it's something that i've had to tell myself like i'm just i'm gonna refuse to get offended i'm gonna refuse i'm gonna sit in it and it sometimes it's a horse pill but you just you just have to just sit and just listen just don't even say anything just like my favorite thing's like okay even if you type it out and then you delete it yes yeah okay i've done that you're not done that even if you type it out and you delete it yeah because at least if you type it out and you delete it. Yeah. Because at least if you delete it, you know that you're not going to allow your flesh to react.

And you have enough common sense to go that I want to say it, but I'm not going to. Yeah. True. And that's in all relationships. Yeah. Because in every relationship, somebody is going to irritate. The closer you are with people, they're going to irritate the crap out of you. They are.

It's just the way it is. I mean, I'd be lying if every single person on that panel hasn't irritated the crap out of me. And vice versa. We're way close. Do you know what I'm saying? There are things that we're going to say and do that are going to just be like, wish you hadn't said that. Wish you hadn't done that.

But your love and affection towards each other should be supersede right any irritation because you know that is like once in a hundred to a thousand times of communication or our interactiveness with each other you're interacting with each other on such a grander scale and if it it's one time, like you can, you can suck up one time, get over it. But a lot of times we don't even want to get over the one time. And you're going to take each other off. How is it not possible that you won't? You're with them all the time. You have to do every decision, everything. Yeah, absolutely. The more you work with somebody, the more you deal with somebody, that's the way it is is reality is to think that you're gonna it's

gonna be happy-go-lucky all the time you are like not living in the realm of reality and you'll not be in relationship with people if you feel like that that's the way it's supposed to be true it's just not gonna happen yeah just not gonna happen people are gonna irritate you what do you do in the minute moment of irritation but like like with with when Tom talked about it on Sunday, when he was late for that wedding, I was peeved. I was mad and he knew it and everybody else knew it. I was mad because I'm like, it's family. And let alone this family member had gone above and beyond for us.

Okay. And even Tom admits all of this and he admits he was wrong. How do I, even though I was very very angry very careful with my words I wasn't gonna lie to everybody and make it sound like I wasn't mad because you could tell that I was but when Tom and I left together we were very nice to one another and I wasn't snotty or rude. And then later on, even like at the reception, which was a high stress situation, because when we walked in, things were supposed to be done. And I meet my sister, sister-in-law out and before we walk in, high stress.

And I won't go into it because people are watching, but like, so you go from being irritated to like seeing, seeing somebody that you love and care about. Now they're dealing with crap and you're like, Oh, this is, this is, this is great. You know,

you look like you were on a mission. Yeah. Yeah. And I had to be because the people that were supposed to be doing things that weren't on their mission. Well, they acted like they had all their crap together and hadn't been very nice to different people.

So they let people down, but their crap didn't stink. I don't like that. And so now people are having to, to cover up your mess, but there'll be no, it's all pride. It is.

So that's why when Jeff was like, I saw you smile and then I was like, yeah, uh-huh. Because you can't say anything. You want to say something, but you say nothing.

You keep your mouth shut. But even at the reception, like I wasn't faking it till I make it with Tom. I literally was like i usually give myself like 30 minutes to be really mad and a lot of times i don't even make it to the 30 minutes i'm over it in like 10 15 minutes because i'm like okay one moment in time yeah i don't like that but overall stellar human being so move on get it. So by the time I really got to the thing, I was okay until I started walking in.

Then I was mad about something else. Irritated about something else. But even that, like 10, 15 minutes. What do you do in those moments? People hang on and they hold grudges and they don't get beyond things. You got to, in a marriage especially. But if you love people and you're friends with people, you can't hang on to that crap.

You got to just like let it go. It's not worth it. Next thing I say is being critical with one another. A lot of times in marriages, people are critical about other people and they talk about it all the time. They talk about the other people that they're about it all the time. They talk about the other people that they're critical about all the time. And they move from one person to the next person to the next person.

And that's one thing Tom and I do not do. We do not like talk about other people. We're not critical with one another because we know you reap what you sow and eventually you'll be critical about each other. It happens. It happens. I've seen it. And so be very mindful of your words because a lot of times the criticalness doesn't just go outwardly. It eventually, it'll come internal.

And now you gotta deal with that. So are you critical with one another? Because then you start being angry and bitter towards one another because you're picking each other apart and you're always waiting for the one to screw up. I've seen it in several marriages and it's very, very sad. And that's when you'll be at dinner with people

and they're nasty to one another. Yeah. And then you're uncomfortable. So uncomfortable. When you're at dinner with them. Like, oh man. So uncomfortable. Yeah.

And I would say to this, when you go out to dinner with people, don't be passive aggressive at the table. Please don't. Please. It's uncomfortable for all of us. Yes. Because everybody knows.

Yeah. And please, please don't like belittle, demean, or act nasty to the other person. It's not nice. And it's not funny. It's not funny.

And people think, because that causes communication problems. And that breaks down the relationship. That makes people defensive. The next one is choosing words wisely. Most people do not choose their words wisely and most people don't shut up when they should shut up i mean most of the time you don't need to say anything like for me i didn't need to sit there and say to tom why were you late he already knew he was late

he already felt bad and he ended up telling me, that's so wrong. That was not right. What? It wasn't late by a lot either. That, that, no, he was not on time.

That wedding like was, was like on time at 4 PM. That was amazing. Yeah, I know. But at the same time, I know you should be there. Like,

I was there 30 minutes before. We were, we were there four minutes early. And that's because, in his defense, it was horrible trying to get there. It was. It was so horrible. And I literally was having a horrible. It took me and Norma 25 minutes to get there. And it's like less than 20 minutes to get there.

So I knew he was going to be late. But you should be like Tracy. And I thought to myself, well, that's a really smart minutes to get there. So I knew he was going to be late, but you should be like Tracy. Like what? And I thought to myself, well, that's a really smart thing to be there to, to give yourself so much time. This is an irrational fear of mine.

Since I was a photographer, I would have nightmares that I missed a wedding. Like my, I would have a dream that I'm like, I'm supposed to shoot their wedding. I'm the only photographer. And then I didn't, I And then I didn't make it. Yeah, that's scary.

And you can't redo that. So like it's just this weird thing where I don't want to be late for a wedding. But anything else? Yeah. If you know, you know. Yeah. But here's the thing. The other person already knows.

You don't need to give them a beat down. Right. Absolutely. That's why I didn't say anything. Yeah. Because I already knew. He knows. He knew. He's probably beating himself up no he wasn't probably not he was not beating himself

up probably not at all but he's he's honest enough with him himself himself and he was like but he knew i should have given myself more time in all honesty though i should have given myself more time who would have thought it was going to take that long to get there? Very true. And we walked in four minutes before the whole entire thing started myself. So that's the truth. But choose your words wisely. And most of the time, don't say anything. It doesn't need to be said.

You just don't need to say it. There are so many times that we say nothing. We know how the other person feels and we just like say we're sorry apologize and move on that's really if you would if most people would just say they're sorry when they know they're wrong nothing needs to be said right no arguments start pride pride makes you not say yep i'm sorry and I'm wrong. I know why. People are demeaning and they're callous towards one another. Being demeaning and callous will cause you not to have open communication. Are you doing any of these things? Is he doing any of these things? If you

are, you need to have an open conversation about when we communicate can we take this list and make sure we're very careful about how we discuss matters with that maybe even there are some matters that are that are not sensitive issues they're not hot topics right and we all know especially if we've been with somebody for a while we all know trigger words. Don't do them. They're unnecessary. You guys love each other. So act like it. You picked each other for a reason. You picked each other, exactly.

And maybe you didn't know them well enough before you did it, and maybe you did know them well enough. See, there's a lot of people who date people and date them for a long time, and they do nothing but argue, fuss, and fight that whole entire entire time and they still marry each other what are you thinking i know it's because you're too afraid that you won't find somebody else you're insecure so you're you just settle okay and now you're stuck so now you got to fix it you must fix it it's not an Not an option. And what I was, I made another list about why. Do you see my list? About why you would not communicate well prior to you getting married.

One is what caused the change in the relationship? Maybe you dated and you guys had great communication and you were great friends. What caused this to happen? I mean, what do you think can cause a relationship to take such a shift in a minute 30? Well, she'll be late. Kamala will be late for her concession speech. Huh? Are you watching it?

I'm looking it up right now. Look it up right now. It did say four. I looked it up earlier, but yeah, she'd probably be late. She's always late for everything. 13 minutes ago. It says she heads to deliver her concession speech. Okay her okay there we go you can watch it and then you can scroll through it i think keep watching a lot of people gets on we're gonna go a lot of people

date get married right away and have kids right away and so there's this drastic change in your relationship where it was just you two you know that's true and then all of a sudden you have kids and then and raising kids is no joke no joke it's especially if you don't talk about how yeah you how you think raising children should look like right and that's that's huge just to even have that out there to know but then you raise kids and then they're like they're not like i remember somebody said like my kids will never put their elbows on the table ever and then all of a sudden i'm like then i see their kids now and they're wild animals. And I'm like, what happened?

Like, so you have this idea in your mind, like what you're going to do. And then like you said, like you're like, but they're so cute. I thought I would be a really strict disciplinarian.

I thought you would be. I'm like shocked by it. I'm going to be no nonsense. Right. I was a pushover. It's so funny to me. I was such a, I mean,

kind of, but not really. Because you are a softie. Like when you love something, you can be a softy about it oh yeah yeah so i'm like i'm weak i'm weak i don't like that it is that way it's so funny but i it listen if you're my people yeah yeah if you're my people you're my people yeah and like uh travis was telling me something like i think it was last week and he was like i was i said i will not allow that i won't allow that and it was dealing with an issue and a person he was like well you wouldn't allow he wouldn't

allow that i think he said something like you wouldn't allow that anyway and I'm like okay in all honesty that's not true he's like no and I'm like no I hate being honest person I know I know I know it's like no that's not actually true I said because I'm gonna tell you right now if that was Heather Tommy or norma yeah i would yeah i know you are i i'm like i'm you are a freaking sucker when it comes to those three i know my freaking sucker i know and they drive me crazy more than anybody on the face of the earth those three can take me straight to the moon and back in two seconds flat nobody gets under my skin more than those three but i'm just telling you i know they're my they're my they're your people like they can get away with murder i hate it's that that's true so funny but that yeah that's a huge breakdown in a relationship

when you have to kind of switch from like cute dating and cute married now all of a sudden like somebody's got to be the disciplinarian or you both have to work out how that works. Now you have a mortgage. Now you have all of these other things. Now you're an adult. Yeah. Now you're an adult and you're sharing responsibilities.

Somebody's in your money. Yeah. Yeah. One works. One doesn't work. Yep. You got to be taken care of. That's true.

Cause I'm like, what causes a relationship to shift? Uh-huh. There's got to be something. No more dating. No more like putting them first. Now you're just like, go to work, come home. Who's cooking dinner?

Like, it gets very mundane if you allow it to get mundane. Very much so. But kids, man. Kids are huge. And most people do that. I never thought about the kids thing. Yeah. Because that's like a big flipping deal. man. Kids are huge. And most people do that. I never thought about the kids thing. Yeah.

Because that's like a big flipping deal. Huge. Yeah. Huge. And if you have like a big opinion about like what you expect your kid to be raised as, like, you know, obviously there's the church stuff too, like going to church and well, I want them to be in church. And they're like, well, no, I want to keep them with me. And so like, I can't even imagine that would be a hard thing.

Like Jer was so easy. He's just like, he like kind of trusted that like, if I wasn't doing something, there was something like inside of me that didn't feel right. But I can imagine some parents are like, no, this is the rules. We're going to follow the rules and they have to do this and they have to do that. And what if one of the person's more like relaxed

and the other more is like. And that is usually what it is. And then how do you compromise that? Because they're both your kid. Those qualities were cute. Yeah. Yeah. And then you add the extra element to it.

And it's like, oh, those. I actually don't like that you have a strong opinion. Right. Can you not? Yeah, that's true. God bleep. You know what? I'm thinking of marriages that I've seen.

And the husband is usually way more relaxed than the wife. And it's like, yeah. True. It is. There are times that it's like that. Tom was not relaxed. I mean, Tom was relaxed in some things, but not relaxed. Safety issues, Tom was not relaxed.

I was more chill. That's true. But in life in general, i was way more relaxed i i was way more relaxed and he was not yeah yeah yeah he is like yeah but yeah that's like yeah that's true yeah but isn't that isn't that funny but for the most part both of us saw eye to eye on rearing kids not allowing our children to like uh because a lot of times what happens is uh people have kids and they go from being like flexible and free to now like everything's structured everything has it's like my kid at 12 noon, they're down for a nap. And I was like, what? What are you talking about? Yeah.

Yeah. Right. Like, since when has that kid, like, back in my day, like, when I was growing up and even with my kids, in order to keep my kids so that they weren't so, like. Miserable. Well, miserable, but also so that they understood that we were the ones in charge. Okay. Okay. If we wanted to go out,

they came with us everywhere. Yeah. If they wanted to, if we were going to go out, I don't care. Like you're going to go out and you're still going to behave and you're still going to act. And if,

if you are tired, you can go to sleep. We'll make it sure that there's availability for you to lay down or whatever. But you're not going to act like a spoiled little rotten brat because this is nap time. Sorry. The world does not revolve around you. In today's world, parents, even like the generation behind me,

parents have made their kids feel like they rule the roost. Their schedule, their child's schedule, or even their child's. I mean, look at it with sports. Oh, yeah. Sports is a whole thing. Mothers are running around like chickens going from one thing to the next thing to the next thing. You did that when they had nap time. Let's face it.

You did that when they had nap time. Let's face it. You did. Your life has now revolved around, and you may go, well, I just don't want to deal with the bad behavior. Make them behave. We did. Not fun all the time. But your kid doesn't get to decide your life.

And once you do that, you're going down a really bad path. Absolutely. Because then they turn 18 and then all of a sudden it's just you and your husband again. And you're like, oh, you're there. Yeah.

Oh, hey. My roommate. People forget about that. Yeah. It's true though. A lot of marriages actually end up in divorce after the kids turn 18. 100% true.

Yes. 100% true. Because they've lost their way. They did their job. They've lost 18. 100% true. Yes. 100% true. Because they've lost their way. They've lost. They did their job. They've lost touch. Now it's, yeah. Yep.

Just so sad. Mm-hmm. Yeah, very much so. A whole life together and then bumped. And my thing, too, is, and this might not be, you might not be able to, my next one would be how close of friends were you when you were dating? Now, if you didn't date for a very long period of time, I don't want to hear we were best friends.

You weren't best friends. You didn't know each other that well enough to be best friends. Best friends are over a period of time. So tell me if you dated like less than six months before you got engaged, I don't want to hear you were best friends. That's bull crap. I don't even really want to hear that you were best friends before eight months. Eight months is really when you start really getting to know somebody. Eight months is, that's the real thing. That's the real deal. And that's without saying,

I think you're the one. Let's talk about marriage. Because now you're just putting your hope and dreams into the next thing, right? So how long did you date? And were you best friends? How close of friends were you? If you weren't best friends, you should have never got married. Yeah. Never get married. But a lot of people don't make that decision. Or if you weren't best friends, did you know God told you he's the one? Because then it didn't matter whether you're best friends or not. He's the one. But you will be best friends if he is the one. Yes.

So did you laugh together? That's another thing for me. Like a lot of times people and maybe, maybe you're not a person. Maybe you're a solemn person. Maybe that's not a big deal to you. But most people who have a very strong marriage, they laugh a lot. Yeah. They like they enjoy each other's company. Like,

for me, that's one of the reasons why I married Tom. He was not attractive, but he was funny as crap. And he made me laugh. I made him laugh. And we still do to this day. Our kids don't have to be around us and we literally can be in bed at night and we're just crying laughing. I mean, you should enjoy and look forward to being in each other's presence and company without sexual activity.

That's just a side note. Your friendship and relationship, that's the major thing. Yeah. Because that's what's going to carry you when your kids grow up and they're gone. Exactly. Absolutely. But, and this is one of the things, my thing to you, I would ask you is, did you cross lines before you got married? Because if you did, that tainted everything. You're not able to make a responsible, reasonable decision because intimacy crossed the lines where it didn't. And that binds you in a way that you should never be bound to anybody. And so when you cross lines, your judgment is not really sound and so you make poor decisions based on that which will not help you with being able to communicate true if you're

a christian which hopefully you probably are if you're watching this thing and you ask this question if you're a christian then um you need to pray that God helps you in the area of communication with your spouse. And then he'll start giving you ideas on how to communicate better and then be able to convey to your spouse things that you don't like. Yeah. Yeah. Because you're going to have to be able to say all those things without them becoming defensive. Right. Ladies. Yeah.

Prayer is the biggest thing. If you just start praying and believe that God wants your marriage to thrive, then you probably don't have to say a lot. God will like, he'll soften the heart. Even I could even imagine like a husband coming up and being like, why do we not laugh like we used to? When you start really praying

as much as maybe you're complaining about it and maybe you're not, maybe you're not complaining at all. But like, if you are, spend that time really praying about it. Like really seek God on like, how do I be the best wife? How can I be the best version of myself for my husband? And when you work on yourself that way, all of a sudden things just fall into place.

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added upon this. And Proverbs is clear. We're to be slow to speak, slow to be angry. Yeah, yeah. Do the opposite of what you're doing. Go ahead, Vanessa. One thing that I tell a lot of the couples that I'm talking to is that identify your hill. Okay. And then if a topic comes up or something comes up and it's not on that hill, let it go. Yeah. You don't have to say anything. Yep. Just let it go. But if it's on that hill and right now I'm almost 16 years in,

there's not a lot of things on that hill. Honestly, I can't even think of one off the top of my head. But that's just been years of like communicating and working together. But as you're navigating this, like if a topic comes up and it's on that hill, then sit down, have a conversation, ask questions. Yes.

Ask questions. Be curious instead of defensive. And that will help a ton. Yeah, always ask questions. Yes. Because what you think you know, you might not know. Right. A lot of people go into a situation thinking they know exactly why something happened or how something happened.

And so you automatically go in guns a blazing. Right. When really, if you ask the question, you might find out you're really wrong. Yeah. That wasn't, that wasn't the scenario at all.

Right. Right. Okay. And then it's diffused. Right. 100% fun together, laugh together, travel,

eat good food together like get back to your first love get back to the things that you did you know when you first got together and incorporate more date nights more like activities just have fun and even if you're not and for me i would say date night if you are that, well, we really don't have much to talk about. If we went out, we'd both be looking at our phones. Then invite your friends to go with you. Yeah. And eventually, you won't need your friends anymore because you have so much in common.

Again, I agree. I used to, and I still do when I do talk to people and they ask me, but I used to always say, pick your fight wisely. Make sure it's worth the argument. Make sure it's something you need to go the distance on. Because if it's not that big of a deal then don't go there yeah but pick your fights wisely pick and choose most things are not worth an argument right most people fight because of their pride they have to be right yep they have to prove and make sure you know

that you're right and eventually it, it's like debates, guys. Nobody wins them. If somebody really believes what they believe, you're not going to convince them. So don't debate them. But like me, when I'm wrong, I say I'm sorry to Tom. And it's just like he doesn't have to say, there's no argument.

He doesn't have to argue with me because I've've gone to him. And I've admitted I was wrong. Same with him. Yeah, you need to be more humble. And you think, well, he's not like that. He will be. Yeah, he eventually will be just like you because he'll emulate your behavior because he respects how you're responding to you being wrong so he i know that's me because eventually i was like okay he he is so honoring and i suck so bad i need to be just like him and so i followed suit because i wanted to have him look at me the same way i he i looked at him. I wanted him to be like, dang, I respect that. You know? So anything else, ladies?

Let's do a sponsorship. Then we're going to close out and then get to Kamala. Kamala. Is it? Wait, how does it matter? She's gone now. Doesn't even matter. This was the last comment by Galena.

If. Oh, my gosh, Galena. Wait, did you see the second comment that she said? Yes. That is true, Galena, but I'm not sharing that. It's in the rubble comment. 100%. Yeah, have fun with your husband, and then you'll be too busy to fight.

That's part of the problem. But listen, women, there's a lot of women out there that want to have fun with their husbands. That's true. Their husbands don't want to have fun with them because of porn. And that was my only thing I was going to say. Are you coping with it in another way?

So are you drinking? Are you smoking? Are you looking at porn? Are you reading books you shouldn't be reading? Because there are books out there that are close to porn. Holy crap! Yeah. So there's like, make sure that you are blameless before Christ.

If you're blameless before Christ and you're praying for your marriage, you're good. Even if he's not. If you're doing those things because people are playing video games all the time. Everybody's coping with this high level of stress. Right. So yeah, exactly. Oh my gosh, those romance novels are so perverse. Yeah, they're bad.

And then you're looking at something that's not even reality. Right, it's literally a fantasy. And expecting somebody to live up to that horse manure. Yeah. Even Hallmark. People watch Hallmark and they think that that's what a relationship really is like.

It's fake, people. And that's why people are always posting on Facebook about one another because you think Hallmark is real. It's not. Take it from me, it's fake news. Fake news. And I love Hallmark. It's just clean romance. That's all it is. But It's fake news. Fake news. And I love homework. It's just clean romance.

That's all it is. But it ain't real. I mean, are moments of that real? Yeah. But on the whole, listen, those people, they get together. It's like watching The Bachelor or The Bachelorette. I love it blind. Once these people actually end up saying,

I choose you, they don't even make it a month. The Bachelor or The Bachelorette, it's all that romance and stuff like that. And then when reality sets in, they're breaking up. Why? Because it's not real.

Right. Are moments of it real? 100%. Yeah. 100%. But on the whole, no no that's why you got to be best friends yeah because if you're best friends you can withstand the test of time absolutely it's family exactly let's do sponsors let's put this beauty up here this hot little mama laura keller and the real estate appraisal associates of southwest florida inc has been in business since

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what happens is at these garages, the mechanics are paid a commission. So they get like $9 an hour, right, at these dealerships. And then whatever they tell, not the salesperson, but the person that speaks to the direct connect to the person that brings in the car the customer um they get a commission based off of what they tell them is wrong with the car oh yeah so what was happening is is that the garage he was working at

the direct contact is he wouldn't do that. The direct contact was making up things, adding on. Yep. And he left because he's like, I didn't tell you that stuff needed to be done because that stuff doesn't need to be done. And you're selling things that don't need to be sold. And you're ripping people off.

He said, I wasn't even saved. He's like, I wasn't even saved, but you don't need to be sold. You're ripping people off. He said, I wasn't even saved. He's like, I wasn't even saved. But you don't do that. So he literally left that place, had no job, left that place and said, I'm not doing this.

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Am I saying that both of them are perfect and they never get it wrong? No, I'm not. I can't even say that about myself. Let alone the peanut gallery. Okay? For sure. But on the whole, what are you getting? And that's what I judge things by.

So we're not going to be here on Friday because birthday girl. Yeah. I should have done something for you today. No, thank you. Flippin' flappin'. I didn't even think about it. We'll catch her on the flip side on Wednesday. A little have done something for you today. No, thank you. Flippin' flappin', I didn't even think about it. We'll catch her on the flip side on Wednesday. A little late.

Better late than never. Nah. I already had, it's been a whole birthday month. It's just never ending. Yeah, between her and Vanessa. I know,

exactly. That's true. Yeah. All right, whatever. Okay. Whatevs. Yeah.

Love you guys. Celebrate, celebrate, celebrate. Jesus is king. King amen Jesus is president yes Lord of Lord oh my gosh well he is that's not what I'm going about I'm going I'm saying that because there are so many Christians that were like Jesus for president what does that what I've not seen that one yet. I just want to strangle you like religious wackadoos that are too afraid and too cowardly to go Trump for president. Yeah.

Okay. A lot to celebrate because you know what? Jesus is king. God is number one. And he just made a mockery of every single evil, demonic politician. And like the powers that be that are running the show. Everything that they set up, they failed miserably. Not because Trump is so great, but because God set them up. And he made sure that they failed 100%. and the prayers of the righteous were heard.

Thank you for praying. Yes. And we stood in the gap and we win when we do that. Yes. We got a lot to celebrate. This weekend's going to be great. We're going to see you on Sunday.

Whoop, whoop. Watch time. Yeah, that's right. That movie's great. I love that movie. I'm going to have to watch it. I mean, it's great, but watch the TV version. Yeah, okay, there you go.

Or with VidAngel. Oh, yeah, there you go. VidAngel, it filters out all the yucky stuff. Okay, listen, it's a two-hour movie. If VidAngel gets a part, it gets a hold of it, it's going to be down to 30 minutes. You won't even know what's going on. Tim Rolts has arrived. Oh, he's a two-hour movie. If Good Angel gets a part, it gets a hold of it, it's going to be down to 30 minutes. You won't even know what's going on. Tim Maltz has arrived.

Oh. All right. Tim Maltz is here. We out. All right. Bye. Bye. Bye.

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