The Hope Hotline - What is Love? | Good Friday

Episode Date: April 3, 2026

What is Love? | Good Friday

Hello and welcome to the Hope Hotline. Thank you for joining us today. Happy Good Friday. Woo! Party! I normally say that Fallback is my favorite day of the year. But... But I must evaluate that. Yeah.

Because I think actually today. Today, good Friday. Yeah. Yep. Okay. I think today's it because man, oh man. And we're talking about love today. Yes, we are.

And I never correlated. I was telling the girls, you know, I felt like we were supposed to talk about love. Not the kind of love that you guys think we're talking about. This is hope after all. Yeah. But I was telling Vanessa that I didn't put it to the two and two. together. I felt like the Holy Spirit was saying, on Friday, you're going to talk about love.

And like a different, kind of a different aspect on love to a certain extent. And I knew that Friday was good Friday. Yes, you did. But I didn't correlate it at all. And so like this morning when I was spending time with the Lord and things like that, I was like, okay, we're going to talk about love on the podcast today and kind of like gathering my thoughts. And the Lord brought it to my mind. Yeah, because today is the greatest of love. It is. And I'm like, oh, my gosh, the sacrifice. That's so funny.

I am blonde naturally. Clearly. Clearly. I mean, I do color my hair ever so slightly. But it's been, like, I don't know. Four months since I colored my hair. And you're blonde. It's blonde.

And that proved it. Same a day. I am ashamed to say that I did not even put that together. But they did. I mean, they did right away. Right away. They thought,

oh, that's genius. She's going to do a good Friday one. So, like, what's that going to look like? I came into them like, girls.

Yes. And they were like, yeah, that's why we thought you did it. And I'm like, no. Not even close. Tell you,

with me. That's scary. That's so funny. So that makes me even more worried about myself if Talia and I are thinking alike. That brainpower won't be solving too many crimes or solving too many mysteries. You guys would solve all the crimes. That's a different part of your brain. That you guys would solve every crime.

Because I can't solve crimes. That would not be ours. I'd be like, where's Talian hope? Literally. It's time to solve some crime. that's a different part of your brain. This was like common sense. Yeah, but I have a lot of common sense.

Okay. Excuse me. At least I like the thing I do. I just burped. Lemon lime, Alani. Which, by the way, new flavor. Oh, I was going to say, wait, what did you say?

Lemon lime. Oh, alani. And it's yamo. Is it giving spright? Yeah. Kind of a little bit, but better. It's lemon lime slush. Oh, yeah, that sounds good.

It is good. It is good. So we're going to talk about love today. And it's not in the, and it isn't, the thing is, is when I say this, it isn't like we're talking about love from the sacrifice. It is, but it's kind of different. The sacrifice of what Jesus did for us is just such a small little part of what I want to talk about. But I'm going to let Tracy start and then I'm going to finish and then we're going to get going.

Perfect. Okay. All right. If you are watching on Facebook, hello, I'm glad you're here. Let us know who's watching. You could be on the Hope Hotline or on Foundation Church. So either way, let us know who's watching. We have YouTube up and running. So if you want to chat over there, that's fine. But we do have Rumble going strong. So head over there. Say hi. Let's see who's here. Anne Marie. I thought you had an E in your name. No, just Anne Marie. Okay. I think I've spelled your name wrong for the last four years. And then who else is here? Vanessa, mom is in the chat. Hi, Mom. How's that freezing cold weather up there? She's back. Yeah, she went back. March 31. She went back. I feel for you. I know. I know one day it was warm and then the next day it was freezing. So it's not too bad today, but 35 for a low. So that's fun. Sorry, Mom. And then Sharon's watching. And yeah, we've got all the people. Okay, Amory, it's definitely without an E. Maybe I didn't spell it wrong. Maybe I just made that up in my brain.

But anyways, we're glad you guys are here. Thanks for watching. Thanks for joining us on this Good Friday. Of course, you can get the audio podcast later today. It's available right over there on Spotify and all the other places. You can find it. Natalie is coming back. I hope you guys are excited.

I am. I've got some good stuff coming for her. She will be here Wednesday, April 15th. So if you do have questions, you can still send it to Ask Hope at Hope hotline.com or you can send it here, or you can DM me on Instagram, all the things. Wherever you want to send it, you can send it, I'll find it. And then the day of, if you want to try to ask a question, you have the option to do that, but sometimes it's easier for Natalie to be able pull whatever she's got in her.

There's just so much stuff, so it's good for her to have like a minute to kind of collect herself. We're obviously on Instagram. I did update our little pictures, so I won't give it the wrong number again. So Hope is doing her name the tune and Vanessa's doing random stuff like me and then Talia also one random one every six months. Me and Vanessa and I hyperfixate and do it. And then every once in a while, Talia will do something crazy. It's a feast or famine. Exactly.

Literally. That's the only way to do it. However, on the TLP, we got Tom Leapley and then Tom Leapley FC. So we're going to do, we have his preaching clips and then we also have his podcast. podcast clips. Plus, they were doing some new videos, too. So you want to check those out. Just some feedback Pastor Tom has based off what's going on right now or anything at all. So there's just, you'll, you never know what you're going to get with these new clips. They've been great. So we also have.

You want to talk about what he's doing, what he's got coming up starting next Friday? Mm-hmm. Maybe he wants to announce that. Okay. Maybe we don't do that. Okay. I'm chewing in your ear. It's very ASMR. What does that mean? Like when you make like satisfying noises, but you do it with like different things.

Like people will like like, like. That is not satisfying to me. I actually hate when I see influencers doing that. That makes no sense hope because you love muckbanks. Right. I don't like the. I don't get it. Which is a form of ASMR.

It is. It is. Hope. I just can't ever pin you down. I don't like to tap it. Okay. Why do we have to tap? Everybody taps.

Why don't you just be your own person? Like, muck bangs, everybody choose things differently. No. They don't. It's like, no, because my muck bangers, for the most part, we're coming back to us. Sounds good.

My muck, okay, we were talking about this. Yeah. Everybody does this with their nails on whatever they're talking about for the love of everything that's holy stop they won't they'll never stop they'll never stop hope just like your muckbang people they'll never stop because muck bangers either are like the muckbangers that I like they're not the ones that go okay they don't do that the muckbangers that I like put the whole chip in her mouth, quietly chew, and they're quite impressive. Except for my, my, except for, except for, I can't even watch Celopai anymore because she's so loud, I'm like, I'm done with you.

And Sycayas, I like her, because for the most part, every now and then she gets a little smacky with their lips, but she likes to talk about her food. And I'm usually hungry. You're usually fasting. So I'm enjoying what she's talking about. Okay. You know what Emma does? If she's getting, let's say, Chick-fil-A, she'll find a muck-bang of someone eating Chick-fil-A while she eats her Chick-fil-A.

She says it makes it taste better. Like there's a girl on TikTok. Her name is Matt, M-A-T-T, and she does what I eat from 8 to 5. And she is probably, she's probably the best. Eater I've ever seen and she's a heavier girl. She's really cute girl. She's at, are you looking her up right now? No, no, no. I can't. I can't. You don't have to, but I'm like, she's really a really pretty girl. But man, because she's heavy, people are so flipping mean. I'm like, if she wants to be heavy, like what is it to you? Right. And then there's let her eat. I love her. Have you heard of Courtney Cook?

No. You would love her, I think. She eats all the things. I don't think she's a muckbanger, but she shares what she eats. And that girl eats. And she eats, but she's a skinny little thing. And they praise her for it. Yeah.

That is, sorry, Norman just sticks to me. I was making sure. See, the thing is this, look up that girl, Matt. She's a very pretty girl. I mean, she's a cute girl. Okay, maybe not very pretty, but she's an attractive young woman. What's her name? She goes by Matt, M-A-T-T.

That's it? Mm-hmm. That's it. What? I know. I thought it was a, I was like, like, why do you have a guy's name? But it's actually short for something else. Is this on TikTok?

Mm-hmm. I don't see her. I'll send it to. Okay. Sorry, people. Happy Good Friday. But it's like, I know. I have it. It's like everything, Florida. Oh, there's my sweet man doing his TikTok.

Hello, hottie. That's her husband. You're looking good today. Man, I just love that guy. I know you do. Not to be sick and sappy, but, man, is it nice to be in love with a person that you love, that you're married to? It's a good thing. Okay. So did you find her? I found her. She's a cute girl. Yeah. She is cute.

Did you send it to me? Can you send it to me? I will. Send me anything. And she'll do like her outfits for the week. I mean, but people are, people are mean. And I told you this. Like if we're going on TikTok, prepare yourself.

Because people, I don't know what it's like, I told you it's like the Wild Wild West on here. And so you just have to prepare yourself. Like for the nonsense. Well, my thing is, is like she doesn't. even eat like, like horror. I mean, she does eat some stuff that's bad for you, but lots of people eat way worse than, but they are mean. They'll even make fun of her nails. She gets her nails done. They'll make fun of her nails. But it's the shape of her nail, not the job that the tech did.

I mean, people are mean. Be nice. Golly. I know. I just saw a TikTok about a woman and she's like, be nice to your husband. Like, be nice to him. he works really hard for you. Like, be nice. And I'm like, are we not nice to our husbands? People aren't nice to their husbands. No, people are not nice to each other. People are not nice and they say I do.

They're not nice. And I'm like, listen, I'm thinking as somebody specifically that watches this podcast, and they might be on right now. I don't know. But you'll know it's you when I talk to it when I say it. Okay. This is all hope right now. And like, here's the thing.

Like, they'll know who I'm talking about because it speaks huge volumes. I'm not saying that this person has it going on all the time. I'm just saying in general, in this area. This is nice. We're coming back. Okay. Yeah. Okay.

I thought you're rebuking somebody. No. I'm not going to be here for this one. No. I think it speaks volumes about this couple. This couple had marital issues. Mm-hmm. I'm not going to go into the marital issues.

But they're somewhat of a younger. couple. They had marital issues and it was because they were doing things wrong. Okay. What they did is they confessed the marital issues to one another and decided, you know what? We're going to put God as the center of this relationship and we're going to move forward from here and we're going to make our marriage the biggest success that it can be. I'm sure that they do things wrong and they don't hit it out of the park every single time. But what they don't do is throw the past back in each other's flipping faces and treat each other poorly to justify however they feel on that day. You know what I'm saying?

They've made a commitment. They've stuck to it. And I would say to you, when I see them, they look pretty dang happy. Yeah. And they're both pretty strong individuals. Do you know who I'm talking about? No. I'll tell you later.

Okay. Because you know, I mean, because this person is not shy about, about, you're talking? Yeah, I totally know. Yeah, they're not shy at all. They've actually used it as a testimony and to bring hope to other people. But the reason why it works is because people always want to act a certain way, whenever they want to act a certain way, because they feel like they're justified in it.

And they'll either throw up the past to try and justify that bad behavior, whether it's because they're feeling hormonal or they had a bad day at work or, and that goes, men at bad day at work, women feeling hormonal, or vice versa. I don't know, but it might not even be the past, but because they feel like yucky about themselves or like they just feel mean, they take it out on one another. And it's like, stop. Like, just stop. Be nice. Be nice.

We're talking about love today. Yeah. Let's talk about love. Like, it's ridiculous. Because the word is very clear and even defines love. in first corinthians it does yes it does uh-huh love is patient yeah love is kind love it doesn't mean keep record of wrong yeah it's really you can be really nice and you can really be a loving and show love when you keep no record of wrong yes because lord knows

none of us want record or wrong right we don't even want the lord to keep record or wrong so right I don't know as far as the east is from the west thank you Lord for that amen yep but yeah people are really like the person that you say you love the most and the whole entire world right which should be your husband by the way if you're married not your child or children so and that goes for and you'll confirm this with me Tracy that means even if you get remarried and you didn't you don't have kids that you share together yeah that person that you married is precedence over the children. Absolutely. Right. How are you going to have a solid, a solid structure of a home if there's an imbalance in that relationship? And a lot of people will justify having their

children from another marriage take priority because of the guilt of it not working out with the first. But you're out of balance and you'll be divorced again. Right. Right. It's out of order again. Right. Right. For sure. Because some was out of balance the first marriage. So you might want to try and fix it for the second one. I don't know. Call me crazy. I mean, the second marriage, there's a higher divorce rate for your second marriage. Yeah. It's up to 60% and then even higher for your third marriage. Why is that, I wonder? Because you do the exact same thing. You marry the same exact person. Or the opposite and then, but you still bring yourself into it. And you're, and you never fix the problem that you had in those marriages. Or you weren't the problem. Or you weren't the problem.

and maybe it'll work. Do you know what I'm saying? Typically, you pick the same thing because that's what you know and that's what's comfortable. Or even if you're not the problem for why you got divorced, like I even know, there was things in my marriage that I didn't want to bring into this next marriage, my past marriage. Like there was just, I was young, I was learning still and there was definitely things that I'm like, yeah, I can see. Like you start. Well, that caused a problem. Exactly.

Right. Exactly. Yes. So you start learning those things. Or you don't and you don't get better. And then you just go into another marriage. Right. Broken.

And a lot of times they will go into another marriage unheeled. Right. That too. Yes. And. Because you don't give yourself enough time to get rid of the baggage that you are carrying from the previous and you bring it into the second one. Right.

You're supposed to take, this is like statistically, you're supposed to take one year off totally for every five years you were married. So if you're married 10 years, you should take two years and like find yourself again, get strong relationship with the Lord, like, re-evaluate what you even want. That's smart. Yeah. Yeah, it is smart. I didn't, I mean, like, that's really smart.

I would say that, if, that would be true for somebody who was in a really, like, excuse me, like a really, like, if you had, I'll use Vanessa, because Vanessa dated that guy for a long time. Oh, yeah. And, like, four years. Now, how long was it between? It wasn't the length of time, but you also knew the Lord told you it was Jeff. So there's some things that you did.

Yeah, I think it was like a total of like two years in between. Which is significant. But that's a significant amount of time for dating. But I think when you date like what you did, because you dated that guy from high school, out of high school, correct? So that was like you really had given your heart to somebody. I did.

And they kind of trampled on it too. So like you kind of. of like me to even if you didn't marry the person it would be wise to allow yourself some healing time in between 100% and fall in love with the Lord and that's yeah like exactly you set yourself up for success when you do that yep I I did that when I walked when I when I walked away from the Lord and I came back I didn't get involved with anybody until I because I was like I'm damaged goods man I like got to I got to figure out me first and what that looks like with him again before I can even add another person into the

mix. Yeah. Wife. For sure. Yep. And I literally had been broken up for years before. I think I broke up with that guy at like 20 years old, but I met Tom when I was like 25, almost 26. But I had walked away from God. So there's got to be some kind of reconciliation with the Lord and figuring out how strong that relationship is before you can enter somebody else into it, because then you become distracted. And a lot of people just get saved and then they want to meet the person. True. Yeah.

Which is not good either. So, I don't know. Interesting stuff. We're going to do sponsor really quick and then we're going to get into this. When it comes to knowing your home is really worth, what your home is really worth, precision matters since 2005. Real Estate Appraisal Associates has been one of Southwest Florida's most trusted names and certified residential appraisals.

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You can reach them at 941-3962-940-9-6-9-4-1-460-3962. You know, when I was thinking I want to talk about love, you know that song, Tina Turner, what's love got to do with it? It keeps playing out in my mind. Hey, can you do me favor? That's Norma, FaceTiming me. She doesn't pay attention to the podcast. Wow.

So silly. Yeah. So, thank you very much. I was thinking like, what's love got to do with it? And I was thinking to myself, like, that song is so funny to me. But love's got everything to do with it. it when it's your relationship with the Lord. True.

Like everything is founded on love. And a lot of times we always think love is a feeling. But the truth of the matter is the Bible doesn't, hold on one moment. Was she going to show me a pair of pants? She taped. She thought the podcast starts up for. She tapes the podcast every week on Wednesday. Oh my gosh, that's flipping funny.

Sweet. Girl. Sweet girl. She's so special. Okay, she's like me and Katahue right now. Just like her mama. We're missing something. The thing is, is the Bible actually doesn't, I mean, really, when you read the word, the Bible, it's never really about a feeling.

It's actually all about production. It's about action. It's not necessarily works based, but your evidence. Love is evidence of something. How you love equals evidence of whatever that is. Like, Good Friday. Love for us today is equal to a sacrifice. Love equals sacrifice.

And that is evidence of love. Does that make sense, girls? Absolutely. 100%. But we focus on feeling all. all the time. And it's the world's way of explaining love. It really is.

It is. And that's why people leave relationships, leave marriages because they fall out of love because they base their love off of a feeling instead of a commitment. Which is what the Bible, when you like give your, when you like give yourself to the Lord and say, you're going to be Lord of my life,

it's kind of like God has now made a commitment to you. You've made a commitment to him, which is kind of like a contractual agreement, which is what we've talked to about before. Because that's your promise. So it's more of, it's so much less of a feeling and more about the commitment. And how far are you committed?

Like what to what lengths will you go for that commitment will reveal how deep your love is? and I think that a lot of people, if they were honest with themselves, they would say that their commitment level is pretty small because the amount of times that they, the amount of time that they actually spend in conversation with not just the Lord, but other believers, iron sharpens iron, you know, I think that if you looked at

I love this because Andrew Womack says that for most Christians, if they had to have evidence that show that they were, whether or not they should be convicted or not, of whether they are a believer or they're not a believer, he says most Christians, there's not enough evidence that would not keep them from being convicted. Yikes. Because there's really not very much that shows that they're a believer.

Wow. Yeah. But think about that. Think about that. Not just your walk, but you'll know them by their fruit, right? And people, you shouldn't judge. Well, we talk about that at this church all the time. Well, yeah, you should unless you're doing the very same thing. But also, for me, I'll be honest with you. I look at some people in their walks with God and go, I don't want that. You know how when you are growing up, like I had an older sister growing up and like she did almost everything right. Like she's the oldest child. Like she took. care of us, me and my three younger siblings, and she did a great job at taking care of us. She went through a very small period of time where she was like a little wild, but not really that bad. And so, like, you know how you always want to be like your older sibling? There's not much that I could probably say, I'm not going to do that because that got you

there. You know, we learn from other people and we say, I don't want that. You know how older siblings? Now my younger sister could use me as a great example of don't do that because that's going to get you to get you in really bad places. So she learned from me what not to do and what to do. Well, we can do that in our Christian walks as well. Like you can look at people and say, yeah, that landed you there. I'm not doing that. Yes. But that's not what we do because we don't really associate very much with other believers we associate more with the world so what how much evidence do you really have except for attending church on Sunday if not like we always say there's the A B and C team A is every Sunday B and C they alter each other they come when B's coming C's not

when C's coming B is not true like where's your commitment level because church on Sunday shows a real commitment. I mean, that really is a great reflection of how serious you take your walk with God, as well as other believers, because we're to be there for one another. And if you're not there, how can you be there for somebody? Yeah. Very true. I just, I mean, again, what's the commitment level? It shows how deep the connection is. Ladies, you want to add anything to that? No, that's good. That's very good. It's true because usually people commit to things or, exchange their time when it's either not when it's convenient to them or they're going to get something out of it. So their inconvenience will stop people and being super selfish will stop people.

And we're all obviously guilty of that as well. But like the goal is, is if you want to show Christ's love, like it's always a sacrifice in some way, shape, or form. Yeah. So it's unconditional. Exactly. I mean, zero conditions. Right. You think about this. Like, if you were married to somebody well a lot of people are so i'll fix this but um let's think about this those of us who are married how many of us love it when our spouse only does what's convenient right maybe you can do that right how many of us love an employee that only does what they like to do and then they don't do anything else It don't work, people.

No. But that's how we treat our Christian walks, though. We only do what we like or we only do what's convenient. And God forbid if we ask, or if the Lord asked you to do anything out of that parameter, and you act like every hair in your head is being pulled out, and you're not doing it. You're not doing it. You're like, that's not real world. And in your job, you can't get away with it.

but in the spiritual round because there's no tangible Jesus right there we act like we can but you you have more responsible to the intangible Jesus than you do to your stinking job we're so confused about this yeah I think that's why I love Good Friday so much could because it forces us to remember like God sent his one and only son to die on a cross like the sacrifice that was made for us and we can't even show up on a Sunday if it's raining how you think about how long he was nailed on that cross yeah and what how long it was dark out while he was on that cross the veil was torn like it is powerful what this day means. Our sin was laid upon his body.

Our infirmities. All of it just was laid upon his body. He carried all of it on his body as he was on that cross. He was so badly, his body was so badly beaten that he was unrecognizable as a human. Yep. Right. That's a lot of sin. That's a lot of sickness.

That's a lot of disease put on you. And he bore it all for each and every single. one of us. Like how can you not, when the Lord tells you to do something, how can you not say, yes, Lord? I know. I just don't get it. You know, I kind of do because in our modern day culture, love is completely based on an emotion. And we are such an emotionally driven society. it's almost like yeah because people will even say like oh I don't I don't even feel Jesus anymore like I don't feel God anymore and I'm like I don't hear him

I'm like just pick up your Bible oh like start reading out loud and you'll hear him but it is it's like it's that feeling's gone and I can feel it when I'm at church and I feel it during worship but sometimes I don't feel it and who cares what you feel yeah but that's how people make decisions yeah and the thing is is I mean I think everybody can say, I was just talking to Norma about this, but I think everybody can say that there are times in life, that there are times in life that you sit there and go, Lord, can you hear me?

Right. Because I can't hear you. Yeah. But you, like some of the greatest preachers that I love to listen to have said, there have been periods of time in their life where it was dry. Yeah. And they had to fight through that. And they had to say, you know what?

The dryness isn't what's real. It's what I've committed to the Lord and the promise that I've made. And it doesn't matter. If the dryness lasts forever, I will still serve. That's what love is. But that's marriages, you don't even see that. When it gets dry in a marriage, Right.

It's like, I mean, we've grown apart. Right. And you start looking for something else. Yeah. I don't really feel like I love you anymore. No, you're just in a dry place right now. And you need to cultivate and rejuvenate. Water.

Water. Water your garden. It's true, though. Because the thing is, I guess once you've gone through a divorce, like, it sucks. It's so hard to go through a divorce. And then to have to enter back into this, like, dating world. And I don't know how you romantic. I don't know, you romanticize it. I know. I don't know how you do it. Like, you've watched way too many rom-coms. It's not like that. You have to go back into this world that, like, you weren't even supposed to be in because you've already were removed from it. Now you're going back into it. And now, like, who has what? And what? Like, it's... Well, I would say, I'm sitting here literally thinking to myself, like, it's so hard because not only do you have to ask, who has what, sexually speaking. But then you have to say,

who's been vaccinated. That was what my first thought was. Because I'm like, I probably would never get involved ever again with anybody ever again, simply because of that. There's a 10-year age difference between Jeff and I. So the likelihood of me being alone at one point is high. Yeah. And so we've made an agreement where Tracy's going to take me in.

I'm not getting remarried. At 110. At 110. I can't imagine. Literally, I cannot imagine having, being with somebody else as far as like even looking lovingly in somebody else's eyes. I'm in their backyard. Yes. But I'm not taking care of her.

I'm so not interested. But that's what I'm saying. Like, okay, so you're upset with your spouse right now. So like you're just going to start all over again. And you don't think you're going to have an issue with the next person. Like there's going to be, like, you're going into that. same like it's you like you're bringing yourself into it and to think that you're not at all the problem at all like that's crazy exactly fix it like you picked them at some point at some point

things were good and if they're not you pray really hard you can man i i have had family members that contemplated divorce and literally said to the lord make me fall in love with this person all over again and they did and he did yeah yeah like it can happen 100% but that person had to put effort into it and then they had to count on god right and have faith in the lord to be able to you know cultivate you did it's like you said though you fell in love with this person you did there was something about them even if you only dated them for a few months in that few months there was something about this person that you were like mm they got it going on right figure out what that was and make it happen again.

Right, exactly. It's your fault that you didn't know them that well, but I'm just saying. But it happens even with people who date for a really long time. Yeah. And something happens, whether it's the relationship with the Lord is no longer priority or whatever it is, but figure it out because what's out there ain't better from the most part.

And second of all, you can have better than what you have right now and better than what you ever had before if you put an investment. the time and time. Yeah. Right. And even in our walk with our walk with the Lord, like, I think of, I think it's Paul talking to the church of, no, it was in Revelation, actually, it's a letter to the church of Ephesus. Like, go back to your first love. Do the, do your first, do the first things, the first works. And we can apply that to our marriages. Like, if you've fallen out of love, like, go back to your first love. Do what you did when you first got together. Yeah. What are those things? What were you doing? Right. Were you going on dates? Where are you texting?

Where are you sending photos? Like what were you doing? What were you doing? Go back and do those things. Yep. And I know there are probably people listening. They're like, you don't know. You don't get it. Because like I am married or like they're now divorced or whatever and they're like, that person was mean and nasty and hateful. I do get that. But I've also been in ministry long enough that I've walked the. those paths with people. Like I have walked through the worst of the worst of the worst with some of my friends. And I've seen them dig in and say, God, like, either pull me out of this or fix this marriage. And I've seen God do it. And so it's very hard for me to like say, like, are you really doing the work? Like, and I'm not saying it's a never, it's not either or. But I'm just saying,

because some people like their spouse, if they're like, some people like, if a guy's fighting for his marriage with his wife and she divorces him like okay you have no control over that right yeah but there are people that and you were not talking at least i'm not and i'm sure you aren't either but like if the person divorces you right or pretty much says i want nothing to do with you anymore okay there's nothing you can do about that that's abandonment i mean it's abandonment i mean yes like there is nothing you can do with that and i would tell you i wouldn't i if i was if somebody did that to me would I go out and start dating again? Yeah, probably. Yeah, and that's the thing where you can And you can even take that like time frame. Like if you've been together 10 years, maybe take two

years and like go back, don't go right back into dating. Maybe take the time and like where am I at my relationship with God? Where do I want to go with my career? Like maybe take a second, take a breath and enjoy life. Enjoy life. Don't get right back into another relationship. Like heal and like maybe like reflect on like how the marriage went. Paul said it. He's like, it's better not to marry. to say alone. There's reasons for that. There is. But if somebody did that to me, I'd be honest with you.

Like if, which is not, but I'll just leave Tom out of the equation. If I was a person that was married and the guy was a jerk. Yeah. Okay. And I had tried everything. Yeah. And he ends up like dumping me. Say ya.

There's somebody better looking out there. That's how I think. There's somebody better on all scales. And I'm going to find him and he's going to not be vaccinated. and, you know, all the things. It's definitely possible, for sure. It's definitely possible. Because God is a good dad.

And if your desire is to be a wife, which mine was, like, I knew he was. And it was just, yeah. He'll do it. Yeah. Because like, and that's, but here's the thing. Like nowadays, it doesn't even take, it doesn't take divorce because of infidelity. Some people just literally up and bail. I've seen it so many times in ministry.

where one of them is like, I just don't want to do this anymore. Yeah. It's too hard. I'm out. And I'm like, so what is that person supposed to do? Oh, yeah. No. No.

You're free. You're free. You're free. But it's like they didn't sign up for it. But on the whole, though, you should fight tooth and nail before it gets to that place. And if you know you have, then don't let the Lord hit, don't let the, what is it? The Lord. Don't ask me.

Don't let the good Lord hit you where something split you. Don't let the door. Door hit you. Don't let the door hit you with a good lord split show. Yeah, we did it. Tag team. We got to go. We make one whole brain.

With those things. What are those called? One of those things called sayings. I don't know. I don't even know what they're called. I don't know. I was just trying to think. You did.

It came to my head. I was like, is that it right there? I'm like, no, that's not it. I was thinking folk tale, wise tale. That's not any of them. No, no, not that. I don't know. I don't either. So love. So love is very important. Love is important. And I would say, I would ask you, we're going to go through different things about love and the scriptures that coincide

with them. And ask yourself quite honestly, because you know how we are on this podcast, self-evaluation. Very important. Daily. You should be evaluating yourself every single day. Like, And you know what? Usually you can tell the people who aren't. Yes. Because they stay the same. Yeah, for real. They're not changing. So usually people who are not changing, usually are not really evaluating themselves. And if they say they are, then they're not honestly evaluating themselves. They've deceived themselves. So let's look at different things love is and look at yourself and say,

do I operate in these things? First of all, which is, I think, Vanessa, I think you said, obedience. Love is obedience. John 1415 says, if you love me, obey my commandment. Do you, when whatever's in the word, from if you do these things, you'll inherit the kingdom of heaven. The sins that are in there, do you do those things?

Okay, because if you're doing those things then you don't love him. Do you struggle with them? Is it different than do you live like them? Right. Okay. So if you're living like the things that it says, if you live like this, you'll not inherit the kingdom of heaven. Are you doing those things?

And if you are, you don't love him. If you struggle with them, that's a whole other story. Okay. Struggling with sin is different than living in it. You'll know, you can actually, or if it's not even that, if there's things in the Word or if there's things that the Lord tells you specifically to do and not to do, and you don't really want to do them because they don't fit your Christ's, If you don't obey, then you don't love.

It's as simple as that. There's gray areas in life. And if it's like Paul said, some things aren't beneficial, okay, but they're not sin. If it's not beneficial, but you want to do it. And the Lord's saying, that's not beneficial, don't do it. And you're like, I'm doing it. He actually asked you not to do something. Are you going to obey?

because if you don't do you do you really love him are you deceiving yourself into believing you do even though it says in the word you don't you guys James 417

if anyone then knows James 417 417 okay go ahead it says if anyone then knows the good they ought to do and doesn't do it it is sin for them so yeah if God tells you to not do something it's not because he's

a mean Lord savior or whatever. Like he, he knows that's a little leaven for you. Yeah. And so it's so easy to look at somebody else and be like, well, they're doing it, you know, but like God knows. Like, he knows what's in there. And you probably do too. And so he's like, don't even dabble. Yeah. I think of like gambling, right? Gambling's not a sin. Right. Right. But if the Lord tells you, don't do it. Right. It's like you're saying, like he knows that your propensity as a person, what will lead you down a path to that could be destruction for you. He's not keeping you from fun.

He's keeping you from destroying yourself. Right, that little leaven. Because that is where most things start. It's that little seed that you knew that you were kind of like, I don't know, no, it's fine. Everybody else does it. Like, it's that one that goes to the next one, that goes to the next. And then here you are in full-blown sin.

Yep. Cussing's the same thing because it says that about cussing. It will lead you to, it'll lead you to a destruction. It's not good. A lot of people don't think it, but it is true. Yeah. And if you're not being obedient, and then you're like, I'm struggling to hear God's voice and I'm struggling to like feel God.

Well, sin separates you from God. Yeah. Yeah. And why? Like, literally, if you ask somebody to please stop doing something because for whatever reason you're asking your friend to stop doing it and they keep doing it, are you going to stay friends? Probably not.

Are you going to keep trying to talk to them? Are you just going to be like, I'll talk to you when you're ready to listen. But yet you expect you to have this communication between you and the Lord, yet you do the same thing that you wouldn't put up with somebody else. And you wonder, I can't hear him. I don't know why I don't hear him. It's not hard. Listen, this is, it's so simple, but it's not easy. Right? Yeah. It requires you to like be obedient. It requires you to like lay your life down. Literally take up your girls. Yes. And walk. Right. But it's simple. It's so simple. Yeah.

It just. We like to make it complicated because if it's complicated, then it's like, then it feels, yeah. Who me? Yeah. Just don't understand. I can't stand when people are like. Right.

Are you talking about me? Yeah, 100%. You fit the bill. Exactly what we're talking about right now. So don't act like who me. Yeah. You can't be talking about me, right? Yeah.

Most of the time we are. And we're talking about ourselves still. That's true. Yeah. John 1421 says those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my father will love them. That's a bigon. That's a bigon.

And then it says, and I will love them and reveal myself to each of them. Yep. Thank you for finishing that because it's exactly what it says. It's true. Which I think that little last sentence is the most important thing on there. And I will love them and reveal me. myself to them. You can't hear him, right? I can't hear him. Right. Are you guiding his commandments? Right. It says that right there. Right there. I'm telling you it's so simple. So simple.

But people don't know. Like if you don't read the word, then you don't know. If you don't read the word, you're never going to know. And everybody sits there and go, I read it. No, you don't. You sit there and you just like, and again, it's not that I'm, I kind of am guilty of it because I, I do it too sometimes if I just read it versus study it. But it's like I said to the girls, like Psalm 91, I'm reading Psalm 91. And that first two verses, because I was listening to Kenneth Hagan preach about it, but I look at those two verses and I'm like, holy mowly, dwell and abide. I was like, Psalm 91 is great.

And I love hearing teachings about Psalm 91 because it's a comfort, right? You're like, I don't have anything to worry about. Nothing. I am golden. Yeah. Except for when I don't do the first two verses. And I never noticed that before. And I'm reading it and I'm like, uh, I got to dwell and I got to buy.

Oopsie, Daisy. I miss that part. Yeah. Yes. Or real. Yes. Yes. If you're not, then don't expect some 91.

But this is the same thing. People are going. I miss that. Right. It's because you're going too fast when you read. True. True. Or you're not studying.

Right. Because there are, there's definitely. prerequisites. If you have something that you are wanting, there's a prerequisite of getting that. What is that? And if you're not getting it, like right now, like for the past week, I have been, I'm believing for something specific. And I keep asking the Lord, like, I'm missing something. Like, in order to, in order to get what I'm expecting, I know it's not you. It's me. So, What am I missing? What is the missing element that I am or that I have to do?

Where's the revelation knowledge? And until you do those things and you really try and break it down, it's not going to happen. Right. And you're going to blame God. It ain't him. I know. It's you. You don't know the word.

And you're going to blame him and say, you never know what it'll do. Right. That's just not true. We know what he'll do every single time when we know and understand. the word. And then you can count on it, you can believe on it, and you can stand on it, which is so for me, comforting. Same. Literally. Like, I take comfort in that. Me too. Me too. But what were you going to say, Vanessa? No. I'm just, I'm chewing on everything that's being said right now. But it's so true, like, when you're believing for something, like, being so sensitive to

his voice to know, like, there is an exchange that has to happen. Because it's not on his end. There's something that I'm not, you know, I haven't like, I don't know the key. Yeah. And there's something that I have to do in the physical to unlock the thing in the spiritual. And it's just, yeah. Yeah. It's crazy. I literally feel like not in a bad way.

Well, sometimes in a bad way. But like, I feel like roller coaster to a certain extent. Like, I have all of my person. personal things that from my family to my extended family that I feel like Satan tries to come after and then you're fighting in the spiritual realm right yeah and then like and it's almost like on a weekly basis I hear of something that's going on with somebody in our church that is also having to overcome or fight or believe or whatever and then you're taking on those things that's way more important. Even though I feel like I'm on a roller coaster sometimes, I'd rather be on that roller coaster than watching whatever is on Netflix or whatever is going on and hanging out with and not doing God's purpose

and what he's called me to do. Keep me on the roller coaster. Because at least those are things that will be held to my account when I go to heaven. Right. The rest of it's crap. It really is. I hear things that people are literally fighting for in their homes, in their personal lives, and their families.

And I want to be a part of that. I want to be the one that says, I'm going to stand with you on that. That's not going to happen. But if you're not participating, if you're not loving, which is part of what love really is, what evidence are you showing that you actually are walking and acting and being in love? Right. We are so consumed with what the world has, though. We'd rather be a part of that because that actually has no requirement.

Yeah. True. True. But when you go to heaven, you're going to have nothing to your account. And that's sad. And that's sad. Because really what's going on in the spiritual world and in the spiritual realm is more real than the rest of the junk. It really is.

And it amounts to nothing. Yep. And there are people that need you. Yeah. They need you to stand with them. They need you to believe with them. Yes. Yep.

And there's, you know, I love the scripture in the Old Testament when the, the, it was Elijah, no, Elisha and his servant. And they were, like having to go against this army, this military. I think it was Elish, Elisha and the servant. or was it look at this up and it says in the scriptures that Elisha said to the servant

do not worry do not fear for there's more that be with us than they are with them and then the heavens opened and the angels were exposed and that servant was able to see oh my goodness we have nothing to fear

open your eyes look up to the hills that's where your help comes from yeah but that's not that scripture but Elijah Elijah not Elijah there's more that be with us than there are with them yeah and it was like the amycites or midianites or something like that that they were going that that they had to go up against and they had to speak to or something like that they had to give a word or something like that which was scared scared them because back in the

day a prophet if you went and you talked to somebody and didn't give them the word they wanted they were dead mm-hmm mm-hmm so So that's us, though, guys. That's us. We get to be that. Right. And that's love. Right.

And sometimes love is heavy. Yeah. But man, with God, it doesn't have to be that heavy. Right. And if we're supposed to reflect our father, who is in heaven, like he loves people. He loved people so much that even in our sin, we were in our sin when he sent his son to die on the cross. Yep. that one blows my mind.

He didn't wait until we like figured it out. And sent his son. No, he sends us straight up enemy. While we were literally enemies. Yeah. And sent his son. And that's how much he loves people. That's how much he loves this world.

And we should, we should reflect that same love to the people around us. That's why the greatest commandment of all is love thy neighbor as yourself, right? Yep. Exactly. Because there's hurting people all around us. You got to just go to public. go to Walmart.

Go to Walmart. Go to Walmart. There's people. I was there. I wanted to kill everybody in there. You had to love people, hope. That's a true test. Shopping.

When you go to Walmart, that is a true test. It really is. Target, you'll be fine. Public, ne. But Walmart? True. It's a test of faith. Test of love.

Test of love. Do you really love people? Go to Walmart. The evidence of how much you love. Yes. It's tested at Walmart. We'll be there. Yes, I will.

I really is. I saw this thing on TikTok. I think it was a video. He said, you know, some preacher, I can't remember who it was. But he was saying how the enemy is not worried about Christians that go to church and fill seats. He's worried about the Christians who go and make disciples and go and do the great commission. Yeah. You're going to have a target on you.

Right. As soon as you start. doing something for the Lord, as soon as you start being, like, radically changing other people's lives, you have a target on you. And watch out, because I'm just telling you right now. It's like Tom just recently said on a TikTok post that it isn't until you are, you know, you're exposing yourself that you actually, if you're not doing nothing, Satan doesn't, like, he doesn't bother.

You are not a threat. to the kingdom. Now, do something for the Lord. Be about something for the Lord and watch out. Yes. See what happens. Yes. We'll finish up with obedience because we only have three minutes, but obedience is super

important. And, you know, Jesus tied love to submission. and obedience like a lot of us like we were talking about marriage vows and oh you know I had love, honor and obey in mine because the thing is is Tom is the priest of the home and how I submit to him and obey him shows my love for him. It's no different for the Lord. Like your obedience and how you show that and how you perform it shows your love for him. There's no two ways about it.

Love your husband. Love, honor, and obey your husband. And watch and see how radically changed your marriage will be. Like, you'll be treated like a queen. True. There's no way that person, you start love honoring and obeying that man. And you'll be shocked at how much, like, it's like, it has to change because the word is clear.

And if you do these things, then you'll see the results of them. And Ephesians, what's it? Ephesians talks about marriage and about... Ephesians 5? It's Ephesians 5. It talks about what a good marriage looks like. And one of them is submitting. But submitting is obeying.

And how you submit makes all the difference in the world. You show your husband that submission, and that doesn't mean you're a doormat. No. Like you're talking about a very strong woman right here. I'm not a doormat, but I absolutely cater and love and love to honor and respect. And I treasure my relationship with Tom. So there's pretty much nothing that I won't do for him. Right.

But I also know in return it goes that it's reciprocated. Right. And it's how the Lord created us. us in marriage. Like if it's this beautiful cycle. Like as we submit, they then love us like Christ loves the church. And Christ died for the church. Yeah.

So it's like it's this beautiful thing where it just keeps going. Like you're submitting and he's loving you well. And because he loves you well, you keep submitting. Yeah. Because true love cost you something. Yeah. True love costs.

I mean, true love costs Jesus. His life. True love from God costs God his son. True love costs you something. And delayed obedience is disobedience. Understand that. Like, and selective obedience is not love. It's control. So true love, though, is going to cost you something. And it's going to cost you you. And you should embrace that because the more that you don't control things and the more that you submit yourself to your husband and to the Lord, the more radically loved you'll be by because of the commitment level from your spouse. But then you'll see the radical love from the Lord because it just is reciprocated like what Vanessa is saying. You'll be able to see things. You've never been able to see before.

Not because they didn't exist before, but because you've opened yourself up to them. And that is way different. It's not that it's not there right now. It's just you're not willing to receive it because you're not willing to do your part to get there. I don't know how to explain it any other way, but it's really up to you and what you open yourself up to and to what it's like revelation knowledge. The more you study something out, the more revelation knowledge you get. It's not that that revelation wasn't already there in existence. It's just you didn't get, you didn't do your part.

to get to where it needed to be to see it. And that's the same thing with obedience and love. It's the same exact thing. All right. One minute over. You guys have anything to add? That's good. Yeah.

We'll finish this up on Wednesday. Happy Good Friday. Oh, yeah. Happy Good Friday. Thank you, Lord. I know. I know. I love Good Friday.

I love just reflecting back on the ultimate, like, sacrifice. Exactly. And just the expression of love. Like it was love in action for us. You know what I think about? That we weren't in the Old Testament. Thank you Lord. Yeah. Which Old Testament is way harder.

I think about that. I'm like, thank you. Like, he knew. He knew. For the new covenant that I needed the new covenant. That's way harder to live. The old covenant is way hard to live by. It just would have been, I would have been like, you know,

I would have needed a sacrifice every day. Every day. Give me the death. I would have been the sacrifice. Are you kidding me? How I lived? Just throw me on the altar. Literally.

Literally. Just throw me on the altar. Literally. No, I'm so thankful. Oh, man. That's why I'm thankful. So much blood.

So much blood. So much blood. But if you think about it, think about this, because I think about this. I think about it. And I'm like blown away that the maker of the universe. Mm-hmm. literally was willing to give up everything for me. I know.

I'm like I, you know, you all, everybody knows themselves. And so they're like, I wouldn't have done that. Like, because you know yourself. Right. But if you think about, he didn't have to do that. Like he's God.

I know. He's God. And like for the greatest being, like your mind can't even conceive how great he is. And there's nothing that he misses. Right. He misses nothing. Yeah.

And yet for me, and I am so unworthy so that I could live with him forever. I know. I know. Like that's insanity to me. I know. Like that is crazy. I could live in hell forever.

Yeah. But he gave me an opportunity and an option that that never has to happen. Right. But in order to make. that happen he had to he had to sacrifice the greatest thing that i wouldn't be willing to do no and he's the greatest thing willing to do it and i'm not that great and i'm not do you i mean i don't know how to come my childs i would not give my childs for humanity i wouldn't i don't like i like it's so hard from my mind to conceive

yeah that something's so powerful and so great and so beautiful and so pure would do something so willingly and lovingly. I know. I know. I just, how can you turn you back on him? How can you not obey? How can you not reciprocate? I don't understand. How could you not choose him? I mean, in my life, I have done that, but I'm saying in general. Now that you know, like, how you tasted the goodness of God. I know. I'm going to stop talking about this. And more people don't than do. Narrow is the way and few there be that find it.

And it is so, so sad. Cling to it, hold on to it tightly, embrace it. And then on top of that, make it your passion so that you get deeper involved in that relationship that nothing can tear you away. Right, right. Because he is so worthy. Oh man, he's he worthy and so good.

I love you guys. See you on Wednesday or see you on Sunday hopefully. Two services. Sunday Sunday. Yes, two services. 9 a.m. and 11.30. Just come. Come to both.

Come to both. It's going to be the best day ever. Best day ever. Super Bowl of our faith. Exactly. It really is. And then once you go to one, start coming every. I know.

Don't be a priestress, Tom would say. Baptism. and then something awesome is going to happen the next week because that's who's, that's who he is. Yeah, don't give up. Don't give up. Yeah.

Gosh, he's so good. He's so good. See you on Sunday. Worst case scenario. See you on Wednesday. Bye. Real talk.