The Hope Hotline - When Silence is More Spiritual | Part Two

Episode Date: March 6, 2026

The Hope Hotline | S04-E13 | 3-06-2026Send questions to: [e-mail]: https://www.foundationmerch.net/Subscribe to my podcast: https://rss.com/podcasts/thehopehotline/FOLLOW ME: Rumble: https://rumble.com/c/thh Website: https://hopehotline.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the.hope.hotline/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100088757500434

Real talk. Hello and welcome to the Hope Potline. Thank you for joining us on this wonderful, amazing Friday. I am so excited for the weekend. Are you? Yes. Are you sure? Well, because you know what's happening.

Yeah, I know, but I know. Don't forget to spring forward. It's the worst day of the year. We can't wait. I have a countdown. Literally. I literally hate this day of the year. No way.

She just likes the darkness. I love it getting dark early. I love it. I'm like a vampire. You are. I like the sun and I like opening, like Tom will have the whole house dark all the time if he has his way. I have no desire for that.

But I do enjoy it getting dark earlier. Okay. Life just seems to calm down. Okay. So is it though? Well, yeah, because I, don't feel the need Like when it gets dark

There's only so much I can do Okay When it's light out I'm mowing I'm doing everything Yeah And I don't mind mowing I actually enjoy it

But it's really nice Not having to It's true We are not mowing at all right now I mean I don't But nobody's mowing right now No Although we had some really good rain

And it's like a little green Did you notice the green everywhere Oh yeah Oh yeah But the thunder the other night. It was just so nice. Last night even. He wasn't a night about it.

It was nice. I'm so far past Hurricane Ian that I don't have the PTSD from thunderstorms and rain. So true. It's the first one right after Hurricane Ian, I was like. I know all of us were like. Jair was like, the windows are shaking. I'm like, it's okay, it's just a thunderstorm. Gosh.

I know. It's true. I didn't really believe in PTSD. I do now. No, you do. That was quite a day. That was an experience, man. That was an experience.

That was an experience. Never again. All right. Okay. Do your thing. Okay, here we go. Well, just so you guys remember, because I want to make sure hope doesn't ever forget this day and spring forward.

So if you are under the, I don't even know, now it's probably like Gen, probably Gen X, probably even their phones change. But you know what? Every once in a while, it's nice to know that this is coming so that you don't miss church and you can't say, oh, I forgot. No, you didn't because we're telling you right now, it is time to move those clocks forward Saturday. Before you go to bed, don't forget. Because your alarm clock's going to go off and you're going to be like, why is it 6 o'clock in the morning? Nope, it's not. It's 7. Wake up. Okay. So if you're on Facebook, hello. Let us know where you're watching from.

If you are on YouTube, hello to you as well. Let us know where you're watching from. And even if this is a replay, you can still message us. We get those emails and we come over and see them. And of course, everybody can come on over to Rumble. That's where we're at. We get the live chat. We got Anne-Marie's on from good old New York.

I bet it's still freezing up there. And then Sharon from Northport. It's nice and toasty warm here today. And of course, we'll have our audio podcast. available later. Just hop over to anywhere, literally Spotify, Apple Play, anywhere that there is an audio podcast. We are there. So Natalie will be back, but I think it's going to be towards April. We've got some stuff going on this month, and I think we're going to have to wait for her to come back in April, maybe the beginning or mid-April. So if you have any questions, send them over, or even video.

Like if you see a video, something about like the medical world or a question about medical or like a new, I think, Emory, you said something about like soap or something. It was like a bitter, something bitter and it was like a toxic thing, or really used toxin or something like that. And I actually just saw the name the other day. And I was like, oh, yeah. So, Amory, if you text, if you put that in the chat, I'll make a note of it. And I'll ask Natalie about it next time because I'm actually curious as well.

What else we got? TikTok. So if you want to go over to Talia's new video. She got, she went viral. You got like 20,000 views. Her and Madison went to Goodwill. So you want to go over to hers. She's that last one at there, at Talia, I think dot 6'4 or something like that.

But yeah, go check out hers. It was super cute and very funny. And of course, we got Hope and Vanessa and me. And you never know. We might just pop up and show something. Hope is still doing her name the tune. And people sometimes are very triggered and sometimes they love them. So you just never know.

It's fun to read the comments too. Pastor Tom has his as well. he's got the pastor one and then of course the tlp clips so head over there and um share repost like do all the things copy the link all those things help us um and then foundation church worship of course as well and then um i think you guys if you were here on wednesday we played this video but if you didn't see it this is our crave video so crave will be here um at the end of the month i don't I think I pulled up my little thing for that. It's definitely March, and it's definitely March 28th at 7 p.m.

The doors open at 6.30, so you can come on and then you do not want to miss it. And invite your friends, invite your neighbors. Perfect opportunity to start a Saturday night with worship and then invite them back Sunday morning. It's Palm Sunday, so people are typically a little more open during this time. And then the next week's Easter. So it's kind of an easy way to keep inviting them back. So if it's somebody that's been on your heart, do it. Invite them. Take a leap of faith. And then March 13th and March 14th, which is a Friday and a Saturday, Chris Ann Hall will be here.

And she is going to be speaking Friday night, 7 p.m. to 9.30 p.m. and then Saturday morning, 10 a.m. to 12.30 p.m. And you do not want to miss this. Definitely invite your friends to this as well. And okay. So definitely invite your friends and all your people. people to this. It is going to be a really, really, really great time. I haven't got the full schedule of what we're going to be talking about. But I do know that she is a constitutional attorney. And when she came on, if you guys missed it last time, when you came on last time, or when she was on last time, like, her story is pretty crazy. Like, she was like a witch and then not a witch and then a good witch, but not a good witch. And then like a Democrat. And then she was

like a socialist and then she was married to a pastor and then now she's a constitutional attorney, a very patriotic. But she doesn't just like, she doesn't blindly follow anything. Like when I see her on Instagram, if something just popped up in the news, like, you know, if RFK Jr. post something and we're like, oh, okay, that sounds good. And she's like, okay, it sounds good, but. And then she'll explain why. And it's very, it's very neutral. So I do always appreciate her perspective. one of the things we put out is join nationally recognized constitutional attorney with author Chris Ann Hall for a two day powerful dynamic teaching and historical insight discovering the foundations of American liberty rediscovering self governance personally responsibility and moral principles

that preserve freedom so this is something that she is going to share that if you think that you have the rights to do something, she is going to go and deep into that. And if you don't think you have the rights to do something, you also are going to know what your constitutional rights are. And also, she's a great speaker, a great teacher. So yeah, she's really good. Please, please, like, make this a point to come, at least to one of them. Friday night, what is probably going to be such a great night, and then you'll know and feel encouraged to come back. So make that a point to do that. Hope, do you have anything to say about Chris Anholler or do you want me going to Easter. I love her. I think that I really think that if most people, most people will do well

to come to this, I think a lot of times people are cowardly because they don't know what their rights are or what they can and cannot do. And biblically speaking, she's going to show you what the Word of God says, along with what we as Americans in the Constitution offer us and the promises that that provides. So you need to be here. Like it's, it's, if you care about your future and the future of your kids, you should be here. Yep. Amen. Amen. Amen. Okay. Next. The next thing you need to be at is Easter, because Jesus is alive. And so praise Lord. Praise Lord. Come to one of our services. We have a 9 a.m. and 11.30 a.m. service.

So definitely invite all the people. If you are here on Sunday, are we going to have physical invites ready for them? Yes. Yes, we are. So grab some of those. Really be prayerful about it, too. Like, hand them out, obviously. But, like, pray that when you hand it to them that God's, like, really touching their heart

so that they just don't look at it and say, like, I don't know. We'll say, like, really, like, encourage them to come and be prayerful about who, you reach out to, you know, it really is the Holy Spirit's job to tug on their hearts, but like it's our job to go out and at least let them, like, who's going to tell them? Who else is going to tell them? And so we can post about it all we want and we can share it all we want, but like when you personally invite somebody, it just does something. Like people are very lonely right now. Believe it or not, people are very lonely. Yeah. And we have access to every single person at the touch of our fingers and people are really lonely. So invite your friends.

And during this time, and it's the same, for Christmas time, people's hearts are tender and they're soft. And so this can be an invite that changes their life. Absolutely. Literally. Literally, I know. And it's the super bowl of our faith. Jesus is a lot.

Come on. I know, I know. I know. You know what I think, though, too, is a lot of people are lonely. And so so many times people have said, man, I didn't have any friends before I came here. And you give them life in the Word and what Jesus did, but then you give them life through friendships and social outlets and things like that. God first, social, second.

But it's powerful what accountability and friendships will do. Right. Oh, my gosh. It's so true. Very true. And, like, not just, like, friendships that, like, are surface level and you're like, oh, yeah, so, you know, what are you doing this weekend? I don't know.

What are you doing? And like, there are some deep connections in this church. And people really do care about people. And it's so nice when you don't have, like, family, like, close by. Like, it's so nice to, like, have friends that are literally, like, family. And some people don't have great families. Like, I have a great family, but we're not, like, locally close. But some people have locally close family, and they're not necessarily the healthiest people to be around.

So. That's so true. Yeah. Well, I mean, I think about, like, I mean, it's, like, you and, you and. and Tracy, right, Vanessa and Tracy, like, I think about you guys and, like, where would you guys be if you didn't, and both of you don't have family down here. Right. Right.

But you guys have major relationship. You guys are super tight. You're like, not just best friends. There's like a family bond. Oh, yeah. I think about my mom and Miss Barb. Like, they are, what would my mom do without her and what would she do? But they met each other at church.

It wasn't this church at another church, and then they came here. So, like, what are people missing out on from not attending a church? Relationship. That's good, positive, like, well-soiled, you know, well-rooted, pure relationship. Right. Yeah, you can have a relationship, but is it good? Right. Right.

Probably not if it's in the world. because there's a lot of, it's like a medicine. Medicines have lots of side effects, right? And they're not good. That's how relationships and friendships in the world are to me. They have bad side effects. Are they worth the side effects? Most of the time, no.

Because you're going to still get that with people in the church. There's going to be side effects, even with people in the church, but they're minimal negative ones if they're true believers. Yeah. So why not just find healthy, godly relationship that only makes you better but man it can really change your whole entire world and like life because like what would you guys do without each other seriously i literally just messaged her the other day because we have like some stuff going on right now and like like the stuff that Vanessa is doing is going above and

beyond like not like yeah friends would do this stuff but like she's going above and beyond like this is what family does for each other you know exactly and so what sad is a lot of times you don't get to pick your family and so sometimes even that family that you have wouldn't even do it. True. Yours would. Yes, right. Yeah. Exactly. Okay. So you can say that and it'd be true. But most people, no, it's

not that true. I know. And it doesn't just affect me. Like, this is my entire family too, that these, like, and I know like the decisions that she makes, I never am wondering, like, what if she's telling, like, Kylie really bad advice? What if she's, like, telling Tudy something that, like, I don't necessarily agree with, but she had an opinion or experience. And then that's planted in my girl's seed, and I don't even know, but we're so close. So they would assume whatever she says I agree with.

Like, it's not even a thought to think like that. So, yeah, it's just, it really is to find people that are equally yoked. It's life-changing. It really is. Yeah, relationship is huge. Kingdom connections. Exactly. Yep.

It's a beautiful thing. So when you pass out that invitation, you're giving somebody the opportunity to really, really find eternity in heaven. And their tribe. And then you're giving them relationship with people that are not Indian, that are not from another foreign country, but actually, not a tribe. But a part of a family of believers. Oh my gosh, I want to throw up. So, I mean, I can't tell you how many times people actually hang out with each other from here.

You're giving somebody a whole new life, a whole new world potentially. True. That will radically change them. And, you know, heaven is here on earth if we want it to be. And that comes through a relationship. 100%. So. And this church gives so many options.

Like, we have Monday night hubs and Wednesday. And we have all these podcasts. And we have so many opportunities to connect with somebody. and all these events that we do all the time. Like, there is this, this is a church that really can be a community to people that really are looking for it. And people, like, they are.

They're looking for it. They just need somebody to say, hey, like, come sit next to me. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You know. Yeah. We have people in our church that literally will not sit in the same seat every Sunday

so that they meet new people. Yep. Like, that is like, yep. And then we've had people who, if you sit in their seat, they give you a hard time and then talk about you behind your back. I mean, that's church, guys.

and make you feel extremely uncomfortable until you move. You think I'm kidding. I am not. I wish you were kidding. Both the two people, the two families that I'm thinking about that did that no longer attend here. But guess what? Why?

Why is that? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Because you can't fit around a circular hole in a square peg. Mm-hmm.

A square peg won't fit in a circular hole. That's the reason why. People like that will never stay. Yeah. Oftentimes, they do not stay. But that's been, I've had, I literally have had, if I, I could write a book. I know you could and you probably need to. Oh my gosh.

Of the craziness. Pastor's wife, tell all. I'd read it. I would too. Oh my gosh. I don't even, I choose don't even remember how to stuff. No, no, for real. Because it's like so good not to remember it because it's so silly and petty.

Same, same. And people live in that. can you imagine you how if you behave like that in church like what are you like at home I know oh yeah I feel bad for your family and then on top of that people are always like I don't my my mind is totally free of everybody but people literally are living in people's mind rent free they live in people's mind and they think that they're doing that with other people yeah and I'm like you know just because you do that doesn't mean everybody else's and that's why you act like you do.

It's true. Because you're all convinced that you matter so much. True. Mm-hmm. Sad. Everybody's important, but I give no one authority in my life. Right, right. Nope, not happening.

Be free. Be free. I'm going to do sponsors really quick, and then we'll just head. Can I say one more thing about Easter? Oh, gosh, yeah, please. Okay. So the last thing is just if you want to register,

which would be really, really great for us. There's two spots when you go on the page. So you just go to FoundationchurchfL.com, and then you click events right at the top. And then you'll have all the events. You'll see the two that look just like this picture. And there is a 9 a.m. one and 11.30 a.m. one. So just make sure you click on the appropriate one if you do register today.

Do it as soon as possible. That would be really great. We would really appreciate that. And then that is it. Beauty. Let's do it. When it comes to knowing your home, what it's really worth, precision matters. Since 2005, real estate appraisal associates, has been one of the South West's

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Super reliable. I was just telling a Laura Keller who owns real estate appraisals. I was talking to her yesterday, and I was like, man, I really, like, with all of Welland Park blowing up like it is, I would really, I'm like super curious. as to what my house is not that I'm selling it or anything but because it was I was just telling

her the story about it's miraculous that I even got that place like how it all panned out for me and like it's just a true testament of waiting on the Lord which I'll probably speak on at some point maybe we'll even talk about waiting on the Lord next week or whatever but it's just it's like even getting this building waiting on the Lord. Lord because so many times we wanted to get Vanessa knows so just tell you like tell you was a little girl but Vanessa knows like there are many times we spent a lot of times striving around trying to find property or a building made offers on property made lots of phone calls and nothing would pan out and the Lord just

was like wait wait wait so well part of the time we didn't feel like we were supposed to wait we felt we were supposed to be proactive but that actually taught us something for when we did buy this property because a lot of times we went to people personally versus going through a realtor which taught me something because this building we didn't really we went we had a realtor but we started out without it really working like that so it all started with Vanessa's husband making a phone call to us so and this property wasn't on the market so it's just like god knew what he was doing those years leading up to here to try and teach us things and what that looks like and the whole thing it's like you a lot of times we think like

what we're doing is a waste of time but that's just not the case a lot of times a lot of times what we're doing are we're being taught things and we'll use them later and we shouldn't we shouldn't resent those things or those times we should say okay I'm in this season for a reason now I'm going to get as much as I can out of it because I don't know when I'll use it again in the future. But we never, but a lot of times people don't look at things like that. And I can't tell you how many times in my life, all the different careers that I've worked, which have been many, I used to say, like, I laugh at the times where I work for the cemetery and sold cemetery plots and stuff like that and I'm like how in the world will I ever use this you know Lord because I

oftentimes would think I'm not in this for just me how am I going to use this for my future even like when I work for the sports management law firm when I was in my 20s I am taking I use a lot of stuff that I learned working for that company I use it for today for the church if you want to you can gain as much knowledge as you want. It's one thing that I will say about Jeff Tamas, he is always learning. He's always making new pathways to that brain and that brain. So many pathways.

So many. But if you're smart, that's what you'll do. Because knowledge is power. And you want to really be powerful. Know the word. Know your job. And things are always evolving. So if you just stay where you learn something,

20 years ago, like it's not, it's going to be irrelevant soon. True. So you got to keep up. I mean, obviously there's certain things that are foundational, but especially with. I learn, I mean, I, I, there are some things that we have to learn. Just, you know, Tracy and I spend time reading or watching or listening or whatever. And I'm literally like, this is the most boring thing. Or I could, I would rather be doing almost anything other than this.

But I have to. Yeah. Yeah. Because to get to the goal, you have to do the mundane. You have to do the things you absolutely hate. I can't tell you how many times I've listened to those things. And even though I hated the whole entire time, it ended up being a piece of a puzzle that I had to have in order to understand what the next.

You just got to do, sometimes you got to do the things you hate. And if you think are a waste of time. But it's a skill or it's something knowledge in the realm of, knowledge that you'll end up learning that you learned i mean i don't know how to explain it but yeah it's true very very true um along with uh like the spiritual aspect of things in training and renewing and becoming a different person which oftentimes people don't want to do either they want to stay the same they want i i know i've been there like it's way easier to stay the same but And like people work around your deficiencies.

I don't know how else to say it nicely because, I mean, if you're a piece of crap, like nobody wants to do with a piece of crap, but you're like, I don't care. I'm rude. I went to a doctor's office this morning. And it's astounding how people believe that other people need to put up with their crap. it's like they're older they're like in their 70s and 80s and it's like you think because you have the right to say it or do it you can do it okay it doesn't mean just because you can doesn't mean you should but we begin but when we don't spiritually mature we'll look just like that in some form

or facet and we're just going to we'll just be like well this is who I am so you're just going to have to deal with it well that's not the word though and you need to learn and embrace and overcome and be a different person, which is being like Christ, which is being a little Jesus, which is Christ-like. And a lot of times people are not doing that, which you need to get in your word.

You need to learn what that looks like, and then you need to put it into action. Correct? Very correct. Very timely word. Why do you say that? Dealing with something? Just something popped up. It was very similar to what you just.

said that sometimes people think they can just, and they have an opinion and they can say whatever they want and they don't have a whole, like they don't have the full picture or like, you know the unsolicited advice is coming. And it's based on an assumption like we covered last week or not even last week. Wednesday. Wednesday. Isn't that crazy though? Especially as they get older too like you said. Like I know, there is something. There is something about it. I wonder what it is. It's probably something in the brain. We probably need to study that out. No, what happens. I don't think so. No, okay.

I'll be honest with you. Like a lot of times I think people get accustomed to seeing something in the way that they see it, then that is their truth. I say that is their truth because it's the only truth, which is their truth. But it isn't the real truth. Right. So to them it's their truth. And so they will spew their truth, whether it be the truth or not.

And they grow accustomed to whatever they think they see or whatever their opinion is of it, they make it fact. I cannot tell you how many times I have said to not one person, not two people, not three people. Many people, when they give me an observation or they give me an opinion, so often it's an exaggerated one. What do I mean by that? I'll give you an example. I'm trying to think of one that's not something to,

that if somebody's watching, they think I'm dimming him out because I'm not trying to dime anybody out. You can dime me out. I've never had to do it with you. There are just, I've had to do this with a couple family members, okay, where they'll give me an example of a story and they'll make it sound like it's more than what it is. And as you narrow it down, because somehow, some way, I always sense like, there's, this isn't the exact, I don't know if it's discernment or whatever, but what I'll do is I will say, okay, well, or, well, let me say it like this.

I'll be talking to somebody and they'll state something as fact and they'll make it sound like it's many things. Okay. And then I'll be like, well, what are those things? and it'll be like it's only one or it's like, well, I'll be like, well, what happened specifically with that? Okay. And then it'll be like, well, it didn't happen like that.

Well, then how did it happen? And then it'll be somewhat of a different story. The problem is, is with the different story, it's skewed. And it's always skewed to that person because they either have an agenda or they may not even have an agenda. They're just so used to seeing something the way they see it

that that's the way they believe it happened. So they add things to it. I wish I could give you an example that because it happens so somewhat frequently with people that when I get down to the nitty gritty with them that it didn't even happen the way they said it did. or what they're saying, it's what they believe was truth. And I'm like, but you don't like,

gosh, I wish I could think of an example of what I'm trying to talk about. Let's say we have a car in the parking lot, okay, in the church parking lot. And somebody says to me, the car in the parking lot is stolen. And I'm like, oh, that's weird. and then, and you think I'm exaggerating, but I'm not exaggerating. This is how it can be that big of a thing, right? Then you go to the person, you go, well, okay, so the car in the parking lot is stolen. Well, how do you know that the park car in the parking lot is stolen?

And it will get down all the way to where it's, well, did the police say it's stolen? No, we're calling the police, but no, they haven't said it's stolen. Okay, so how do we know it's stolen? Well, because it's out there and nobody owns it in the church. We've already found out nobody owns it in a church. Okay, well, so how do we know it's stolen? Well, because nobody owns it in the church. Okay, that doesn't mean it's stolen, though. Then it gets to, okay, so why do you think the car is stolen? And it'll go all the way down to, and it'll go all the way down to, Well, normally when a car is stolen, that's what they do. They leave in a big parking lot like this. And you'll be like, wait a minute. So you actually don't know that it's stolen. You think that's what's happened, correct? And they'll be like, well, yeah, but it is stolen.

I'm like, no. You don't know that it's stolen. That's what your opinion is. And you think I'm crazy. But it cannot tell you how many. many times I've had to break things down for people and say, wait a minute, is it stolen? Did the police say that it is? Or is that your opinion?

Because that's your opinion that you shouldn't state it as fact. Right. Because you don't know it's fact. But it happens a lot. That's where opinions are dangerous. Very. But guys, I wish I could tell you that's a rare thing. It is not a rare thing.

People will see people doing things and they'll come to me and they will tell me that person did this and I'm like how do you know that person did that well I saw them and then you get them down to the nitty gritty and it's like did you actually see him do it or do you actually think that that's what well I didn't see him do it but they've done that kind of stuff in the past so and have they really done that stuff in the past or is that what you think well I okay I haven't really seen them but I but I kind I know that's what they're like and I'm like doesn't work yeah the thing with the brain it doesn't matter whether the information coming in is true or not. It just believes what you repeat.

So if you magnify those things and you constantly feed yourself these things, these half-truths, your brain then convinces you that it's true. But it really isn't. But here's the thing. Like honest people, there are some people that you'll do this, with and they will stick to it because they're never going to be wrong. No. Then there's people that you actually, when you get it down to the nitty-gritty, they'll be like,

well, okay, I guess that's true. All right, I'm wrong. Yeah. But they will, you have to get them down and narrowed it down to where, like, you don't know that the car is stolen. Sure, we've had stolen cars in the parking lot before, which is true. We have. And sure that it would be an assumption to do that.

But let's remember what an assumption is. Right. Yeah. I know. These conversations, they're so far outside. Like, if I saw a car in the parking lot, I would go home. You know what I mean? Because, like, I, like, but it's not my responsibility, obviously, to pay attention

to what's in the parking lot. But, like, if it was my responsibility and I had to, like, tell you if there were cars in the parking lot, I would say, like, hey, hope, there's a car left in the parking lot. This is the, you know, this is the license plate. This is what it looks like. You know, we can't think. Or you say it might be stolen. No.

No, but people, normal people even go, like that's been in the parking lot for a long time. It might be stolen. No, I wouldn't. You wouldn't, but then a lot of people would. Like, these conversations, like, my brain can't even go there. Like, I would just be like, maybe it's broken. Should we send it to Nix? Is it like, should Nick look at it?

See if it's not, like, is somebody stranded? Yeah. Did we check? Like, do we check in the, like, is anybody in there? Like, I would never assume a car was stolen. But if it was stolen, previously and I knew that then maybe yeah my brain would like connect to that.

Do you know why? Because you've trained your brain I've done the same. I've trained my brain to expect the best case scenario. But nobody would steal anything. Why would they steal something? Everybody's good. But some people, their thoughts go immediately to the worst case scenario and that becomes their truth. Right. Or something that just happened.

But it's so funny. But people do this with people all the time guys. I believe. I believe. I'm using an inanimate object. No, I know. But people literally will do this with people and they will come and they'll tell me things about people and it ends up being that it wasn't even the way they said it not even close i know which has caused people to get in trouble before like i mean it just recently happened at christmas time i was flat out lied straight to my face about some stuff made to believe it was one way when in all actuality it wasn't even close to what I was told. And the problem with that, once you do that, like, you really hurt your credit. Like,

if you lie to my face, I'm not going to, like, hate you, but, like, am I ever, am I going to have a hard time believing you in the future? You go into a nice little box. You go into the special box. Then now I have to question everything. And I don't, like, typically, like, how do you keep those people super close? And sometimes it is a personality flaw, you know what I mean? But, like, then if I love them that much, I would figure out, like, how do we break this? Right. Like, what do we do to break this. Yeah. Well, it's not healthy to like constantly always have worst case scenario or say something

immediate about somebody. Like, let's look at, and I do tend to like be a mediator. Like I tend to always, I know there's always two sides to every story, even if one story's really, really bad. Right. But what did the, was there anything that this person did that they're responsible for their behavior of this person? Not fully.

Well, what's great is, you know, when it's a quality person and you confront them, they go, and this is what this person did. Right. is like they're they're absolutely redeemable but it was like totally totally but it makes a picture look this is what it's life is very dangerous unless you change and you're talking about a person who has had to radically change so I'm not pointing a finger at anybody but myself but it just yeah you have to everybody like everybody like yeah yeah everybody needs to change yeah like Yeah.

Like, everybody does. So invite them to Easter because that's the beginning. Oh, my gosh. Do we put the thing back up? Here we go. Hold on one more time. Oh, my gosh. So Easter Sunday, April 5th, 9 a.m. and 1130.

We've gone down a really bad path. That's how bad people get. If you don't invite them to our church on Sunday. They're going to hell. They're going to hell. There's no hope for them. It's just, it's crazy. It's really, really.

If people really looked at their lives and were honest with their life, honest about themselves, they would have to really say, there's a lot about me. I need to not look at other people, but I really got to look at myself. I know. And what part do I play in every scenario that I put myself into? I literally was just talking to somebody, and that's before the podcast and everything. And that's one of the things that I absolutely love about this person, because they always, I hardly have ever think, I mean, maybe, I don't know.

But for the most part, they've always been a person that has looked at themselves honestly and said, okay, well, maybe could have done that better. Here's the wrong, here's the right, and here's me. You know, and that is such a great. And it's rare. It is rare. So rare. Because either people will do that because they're saying it because they want you to hear them say that,

but they're not actually going to change. And this person could give a rep. Right. That's amazing. It's such a rarity, though, in individuals. You can work with people like that. Well, those are the people that you want to have close by you. Like, even like what happened around the holidays, like, it's a redeemable thing,

but it's like Vanessa says, it's one of those things that now you're like, antenna up. But at least this person was like, okay, I own that. Right. But there's a lot of people that you'll run into and they, never will because there's always an excuse as to why they did what they did not a it's me not you always somebody else and that was my life for so long like my life justified everything I mean guys in my 20s and even probably into my 30s to a certain extent not late 30s but to a certain extent like there was always a justification for why I did what I did now I I kind of grew out of always

never taking blame like I did because that was radical when that guy said, nothing's ever your fault. Like, you have an excuse for everything. That radically changed me. But there was still elements of it in my life were like if I could justify it, if I could steer away from it, you know. But at some point you got to grow up and you got to say, and some people never do. So hopefully, hopefully that's not the case for most.

But we're talking about opinions. That was your opinion. That is my opinion. But it's biblical. That's your biblical opinion. Yeah. What we're talking about is on, which is what you referred to, Vanessa, on Wednesday. But when we were talking about people, somebody had an opinion and you're like, we were just talking about this on Wednesday.

Yeah. It's, the title was for Wednesday, which we'll keep going into when silence is more spiritual. And we talked about that everybody has an opinion. and that wisdom is when you talk less and have more restraint. We talked about, let's see, I'm going to keep going down. We talked about that not every thought needs to be a sentence, which, God bless it, if people could just grab a hold of that, not every thought needs to be shared.

But women by nature were talkers. So we like to share and we like to share a lot. But it just doesn't need to be said. That pride often is the reason why we give our opinions. Dangerous. Proverbs 182 says fools have no interest in understanding. They only want to air their own opinions. That is dangerous.

One of the things that I have in here is the difference between somebody that is spiritually mature. they learn that the difference in giving their opinion, right, is are they being helpful or are they being intrusive? There is a big difference. And wisdom, spiritual wisdom, tells you when to be quiet and when to share. Because even if you think you're being helpful,

spiritually speaking, are you still supposed to say it? If the Holy Spirit isn't telling you to say it, then you're being intrusive, even though you might be right. You might need to shut up because, like we said, on Wednesday, it's not your job to be somebody's Holy Spirit. You're not going to do that great of a job. I can promise you. And a lot of times it's like, unless the Bible says,

unless he draws them in, they won't be saved. When you giving your opinion, they might not be ready to receive that revelation. So it's all falling on deaf ears. Just be quiet. And maybe when it's time, God will allow you to be the one to be used and giving your opinion or not. Maybe it might be a learning experience for you to learn to be quiet.

A lot of times, like personally speaking, I think sometimes I'm put in the positions that I am and made to shut my mouth or conduct myself in a different way than I have before. I think I'm put in those positions, not for them, but for me, a testing. Are you going to pass the test this time? Are you going to be a fool? And like you need to look at it not as an opportunity for them. Maybe it's an opportunity for you. And I don't think a lot of people think like that.

Good one. Good one. It's true though, especially if you want to rise as a leader, guess what? You're going to get tests and you're going to have to pass them. Right. So pass the test. Yeah. It's true.

100%. And if you have done something so consistently for so long, sometimes you got to go into opposite season. We talk about that all the time. Just try the opposite. If you were a chat, chatty chatterson like me, just be quiet for a little bit. The problem is you don't really have a problem. But I used to. Like, I used to just say whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted.

But it's been a long time because I realize what I don't like, I don't like that, like, sinking feeling in my stomach when I said something I knew I wasn't supposed to say. Like, I get that pretty quickly. I get convicted pretty quickly. I always have. And eventually, like, I just didn't like that feeling. And I was like, it actually hurt me. So I don't like hurting myself.

You know what I mean? So like I learn quickly when I'm like and then like looking at other people's face and like seeing them like you can tell. Like if you said something about somebody else and they look at you a certain way, you're like I shouldn't have said that. You know, like that now they're thinking I might say something about them. You know like you just know. And so then eventually I'm like, I don't like this. I got shut out. It's not fun for me.

I got to stop talking. Yeah. So. Yeah. I do learn pretty quickly. I'm a pretty quick learner. And that is and I rebound pretty quickly. but I yeah I like because I like to say words and sometimes you just say too many words and you can't

pull them back yeah so yeah yeah so do the opposite for a little bit just be quiet like hear people don't interrupt people like let them talk for a second it's way more peaceful it is like I used to think it's I used to think that it was my duty and I would feel compelled and that I would think that I would feel bad if I didn't say it to help them. The problem is, is those very same people end up being bothered and resentful or want to, like, kind of withdraw from you. It's way more peaceful to just sit back and kind of like, not let somebody destroy themselves. That's not what I'm talking about because that's not, you don't ever want that to happen. Yeah.

Right. But just to just know that it's not going to matter. You know when you have to say something. Yeah. It's like a prophecy. Yeah. When the Holy Spirit is like now you say this. Yeah.

Like you know. You can't not. Right. Because that's where I got. Like I got to the point that I was like, all right, God, you're going to make it so obvious to say something because I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait on you. And it like is bubbling up.

Like people will say at abide when they're about to think, I have to share this. Like I have to share this because like I can't like even hold it in anymore. You can, like, physically see them. They're like, I have to share this. Yeah. And so, and it always has good fruit attached to it. So, yeah, I agree. It's knowing those cues.

And it is more peaceful. Like, if Vanessa and I were here to always, like, dog you and always, like, yeah, but hope, but hope, but hope, but hope. And be the devil's advocate. Right. This would be, you'd be exhausted after these. Like, you would hate this because we constantly be like, well, what about this? What about this?

And, like, no, some people love, like, some people, I don't know. I mean, you're probably right about me. I probably like, what's the point? Let's do it by myself. You would flip tables. No, like, Pastor Tom probably love it. But even like just being caught off guard, yeah, I don't know. I don't know because he doesn't really, he likes a good fight, okay?

Don't get me wrong. But even that is to a certain extent, right? Right, because you have to be on. Like. And he doesn't really, he's not big into the debating. And people want. a debate and he's just like listen if you don't have the full word I just I don't have because he doesn't want to debate them on their opinions. He just let's you give me your scriptures I'm going to give

you my scriptures. This is going to take about five minutes. Right. Yeah. Because there's no debating here. Right. Right. Because the word is so clear. There's not a lot of gray. It's just not. And you better be able to like it's so funny to me because like even like I was just talking to somebody about. the words saying that how the Bible people are the people have such a problem with the prosperity message but they live in America and they are more prosperous than anybody else in any other country and yet they don't believe in the prosperity message I can't I like literally can't fathom it because they are only looking at the realm in which they live but I'm like you are prosperous and my thing to that whole thing is is look at how how is

it that God doesn't want us to be prosperous? How is it that God doesn't take care of his own people? Because if you look at Jesus with feeding the 5,000, when the disciples said we'd have to spend this much money in order to feed these people, like they didn't want to use their own money to feed them, right? Because they didn't feel like they had enough. And Jesus was like, you don't need to do that. I got that covered. He made them prosperous. He made sure the 5,000 was fed. Like it didn't come through, it multiplied in the hands of the disciples, but they did nothing. So how are we not prosperous? When Jesus even did it while he walked on this earth. I just don't get it. Like I cannot fathom the mentality of that Jesus didn't come. I know. To give. Right. And give more abundantly.

Seeky first the kingdom of heaven and all these things. will be added unto you. Like, where are we at here? It's like, and listen, if you want to live off of $50,000, go ahead. Yeah, have fun with that. Give the rest away. Give the rest away. I'll drop the link. I just, like, for me, I'm like, there's so many places in the word where God or Jesus gave more. Right. Yeah. While he was on this. He's a God of more. I'm sorry. I refuse to believe that I, I, I worship a God and I serve a God that is lacking. Cheap. In any way.

And we're supposed to be happy with that. When he himself rebuked them, because when they were like, it will cost us so much in this wages. And he was like, it's not going to cost you a dime. I mean, Jesus. Exactly. Again, doubt and unbelief. That's why people don't believe in the prosperity message because it doubt and unbelief.

The temple and how they constructed the temple. or even the tabernacle that was mobile. Which is God. And then come at me. Do it. Get her. I just like, oh my gosh, it just drives me bananas, which is not opinion.

But people will give their opinion on that. I'm sorry, they're going to really hate heaven because we're going to be walking on streets of gold guys. They're going to be disappointed when we get up there. No humble beginnings.

Well, they'll believe it then because you're in heaven. And that's really not like the mentality of, no, no, no. Literally, I have been told that that's not what that scripture means. That's true. They do make, that's their, that is their thing. It's like, oh, but that's not what the scripture actually means.

Who just said, somebody said that recently. What's their interpretation of that? I don't know. They said about everything. Somebody just said it recently. And I'm like, oh, no, mine. Oh, wow. Yeah.

I'm like, then what does it mean? Right. Because you better have, like, documented biblical proof behind it. Break it down. Show us the Greek. Poetry? No. Because I have broken it down and it does mean exactly what it says. You break it down and it doesn't mean, heaven did not mean that it's only in heaven. Right. Like it doesn't come down to earth. I mean, I just don't. The words are the words. I don't know. Listen, if you want to explain things away for yourself, go for it. That's your opinion, though. I'll stand on the word of God every time. Even though you say you are like, nah, I don't think so. I don't think so. Ecclesiasty 3-7 says a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be quiet, and a time to speak.

And wisdom is all about knowing the correct timing. And if somebody didn't invite you in, it's probably not the right timing. There will be times that you can give your opinion and a person won't ask you for it. but for the most part, if you're not asked, don't give it. Because they probably don't want to hear it. Otherwise, they would have asked you. And Jesus is a great model of this. Even when he was being accused and he was being beaten,

they asked him questions just before his crucifixion. And what did he do? He stays silent. You're right. It says in Matthew 27, 12 through 14, He says when the leading priest and nillers made their accusations against them, Jesus remained silent. That's good. So not every situation requires your response.

I'm not saying a response. I'm saying it doesn't require your response. My response. Okay, I've read that very many. Like, I've read the story of Jesus many times. Good. Good, I'm glad. And he did remain silent.

He did. The only time, the first I think, responses. he gave is when Pilate says, are you the son of God? And he says, he asks the question or he replies, I am who are you saying I am, or something like that. But up into that point, he had not replied. He had nothing to prove.

No. He knew who he was. That's right. And the thing is, and the thing is, is the more confident you are and who you are in Christ, the less you have to prove it to other people, how smart you are, how right you are, how correct you are. Preach.

And that's where I'm learning. I'm not kidding. That's where I'm learning because the more confident I am and my walk with God, I just don't care about being right. I'm not going to, if I feel like you're not correct, I'm not going to let the argue continue. What I am not going to do is I'm not going to say I'm wrong because I wouldn't lie about that. Well, what I am, so that you are right. What I am going to say is let's move on past this,

because this is probably not solving anything. You feel like you feel, and that's fine, but let's move on past this. Because I can't be disingenuous and I can't be dishonest because I probably do feel like there's some, I'm right in some way. But to argue that point and to be so prideful that I have to convince you that you're right, or I'm right, you're wrong. I'm not in that game anymore. There's nothing good that comes from it. And I have found that there's so much pride in all of that. And I am trying to root all of that up and out of my life

because I just don't want to care about that stuff anymore. There's nothing good that comes from it. But there's a lot of good that comes from walking in anointing. And what that anointing and what you can say through that anointing is way more powerful than being right. Amen. Way more powerful. Amen.

That's where I'm on the side of things. It's more effective too. Yeah, way more effective. True. It just doesn't matter. I know. And like trying to find the wrong in things or I'm a perfectionist. So I like things perfect.

And so what happens is because I have to look at so much for the church all the time, I have to make so many corrections all the time. but I have to make so many corrections in so many different departments and so many different things. And what it does is it makes you have an eagle eye. And I want no parts of that anymore. I want to just be able to do my job and not have to look at that as a part of my life versus just that's my job description. That's a job description. That's not my life.

I can still have things perfect without having to be critical or have a critical eye. Does that make sense? That makes so much sense. Very good. Because there's peace in. That's just a job description. Yeah. That's not my life.

Yeah. Because, yeah, we need that. We need that eye that can see things. But it, yeah, it can't fall over into a personal thing. It is. It's just like you leave it at the door. You fix it. Done.

Move on. But I can't create a critical route. Right. And I find like that people who are critical just from a personal perspective, which I've literally been trying to walk way. I'm so much not as critical as I used to be, but there's still things that I have to keep working on. But I just find that people who are critical, I find this, I'll say it like this, people who ask a lot of questions. We talked about this in the last podcast, people who ask

questions. I asked questions a lot of times. I had a great manager at one of my previous jobs. And instead of accusing somebody of something to find out, like, why it happened so that there's harmony in the department and just working out maybe a miscommunication of some sort or maybe the person made a mistake and they did a job a certain way because they thought that's what they were supposed to do but they didn't. So questions would be asked to figure out where did we go wrong and how can we fix it from here so that it doesn't happen again, which is a great management skill. I have not learned it yet, but I'm working on it. But a lot of times, nosy and critical and busy bodies, they ask a lot of questions.

And you need to examine your heart. There's good reasons to ask questions that are helpful and not harmful. Are you asking questions so you can form your opinion? But is that forming an opinion out of busy body, nosy, or critical? Because if it is one of those three, stop asking the questions. You have no business asking those questions. There are very critical people that ask questions about certain things so that they can have, I mean, when people want to leave a church a lot of times, I literally was drilled by a couple before they left this church because they were asking questions about something that they believed they had formed an opinion because they had been gossiping with people, formed an opinion about the church. And they came in and

they had a meeting with me, and it was a series of questions that the reason they were asking them was not out of, they came in as we're trying to help. They were not trying to help. What they were trying to do is stir up, be critical, and be busy bodies because they wanted to share what they found out. And after they walked out, they felt stupid because everything that they had come to the conclusion of was actually not anything like they thought it had been. What they wanted to do is when they left the church, they wanted to be able to say, we're leaving the church because of this, this, this, this, and this. And it's all because of the church. What it really was is they had done some pretty not cool things to some people in this church. And they didn't want to own that. So it's easier

to blame it on the church. Always. Then to really be, we have a problem in an issue with some people in this church. And it has nothing to do with the church. It has everything to do with we're harboring bitterness and resentment towards people. So for me, why do you ask the questions you ask? What's the heart behind it? Because you'll be judged by your heart. What's the motive of the heart?

Is it to be critical? Is it to be a busy body? Is it to form an opinion so that you can like say see? Right. Yeah. Like when you find out the information, what are you going to do with it?

Talks amongst it with your friends or your spouse or like, I didn't know. You don't need to know. It's not your dagging business. And sometimes it's nice not knowing things. Gosh, it's so nice not knowing things. I wish my life was not knowing things.

I know. Because I've been at Foundation Church, I don't know, 12 plus years. And whenever someone leaves and I find out or I just don't see them, I'm like, what happened? I know. I don't know what's going on ever. It's because I mind my business. I know. And it's not your business.

Right. And I'm about kingdom work. If you get busy just doing kingdom work, you don't have time to be critical. You don't have time to gossip. That is something I love about, like, the leaders here is like, if it's not my business, I don't have to know. And I love that. Like, we don't have to have meetings all the time about all these people, like this person.

Like, I don't want to know. I don't want to know. If it doesn't affect me, I don't want to know. If it does affect me, like, tell me the least amount of information you need to know just so I can be aware of, like, you know, because we do have to protect our people, obviously. But like, if I don't have to know, I'm so glad that I don't know. Well, it can be good and bad for, like, on both sides of it, because it's true. Like, if something bad's going on, we don't tell anybody about it.

We just, we just, God handles it. There's something going on with a family or people or whatever. We don't talk to stuff about it, hardly ever, unless it has to be dressed with them. Right. but they don't even know about it. But even on the good things. Like when we do things for people and we blessing, best people or different leaders in this church

when God puts it upon our heart to bless them or whatever, we don't even talk about that. It's nobody's business. It's not the staff's business. It's not the parishioner's business. That's God's business. Because if God says you're to do this for these people, then you do it for those people.

And everybody else needs to mind their business. so that you can be critical of it because it doesn't meet your standard. Right, right, right. But one way or the other, bad or good. It's not your business, one way or the other. It's biblical, too. Don't let your right hand know what your left hand is doing.

Literally. It's true. You apply that everywhere. You apply that across the board. I know. Yeah. It's so true, though. Or, yeah.

Like, we just, like, and there are people that really are bothered when you don't tell them. Like, we literally have had people leave this church. because we didn't tell them what we've done for people. And they've passed it around that we didn't do anything for anybody. And like other people said, that's not true. I know that's not true. And they're like, well, they should tell people.

And it's like, no, how about you trust your leadership? Right. That's true. Yeah. How about you trust your leadership? And like, I just don't, I don't. It's because you're critical. That's the reason why.

You have a critical lie, which makes you not trust your leadership. You need to examine yourself. or you need to leave one of the two because if you can't trust your leadership you need to go you should go right i totally agree it's not it's not uh somebody's place to be like that i would have never never spoken to a pastor or question certain things if i did feel like that i left yes right i just left because i'm like something's a miss i just yep yep but make sure you know what you're really thinking are they what you're thinking or your opinion is actually correct.

Right. Make sure your opinion is actually correct. And it's not something that's been conjured. And let's say there is, like, you don't feel like leadership is doing their role, whatever. Then you step up. You do it. You go be a pastor. You give that person whatever you think that person means.

Yeah, you go the extra mile. Yeah, you be the solution. Come on. I know. Let's go. That's when I said to my girls when they were little, I'm like, that's the problem. What's the solution? And I have to say that to adults still.

Like, okay, that's the problem. What's your solution then? If these are all problems, what's the solution? Me to fix it? Okay, what do you want me to do? Because then they don't even have that. And that's why we as believers should live a prosperous life so that when we see a need, we can fill it.

And we don't have to rely on the church or the government or whatever it is. True. You know what I mean? Like we can see the need. I can see a need and fill that need. Go and meet it. Right. In the moment as the spirit leads me.

And as the spirit gives me the eyes to see it. There's something powerful about that. Then you're no longer, it's like what you said, you don't know what a lot of things when people leave, you don't know. No. It's because you're about kingdom business.

The same thing would be for those people. They would actually feel like, I'm so blessed that the, which they probably would be wrong. I'm so blessed that the leadership didn't do that. God probably gave me the opportunity to do it because it wasn't meant for them. It was meant for me.

Right. That's how it works. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Correct. But it's so much easier to be offended or bothered or critical. Way easier. And like you said, it's just what they've always done so they don't know.

There's a better way. Right. There's peace in the other way. Right. And it is comforting. It is. It's because it's God's way. It's great.

Yes. And that's the body of Christ. Yeah. Like if we're all doing what we're supposed to be doing as the body of Christ and what a life it would be. What a life. What a great way it would be. What a life.

We would not be where we are today. Oh my gosh. As a whole. So, so true. That's why I'm going to do my part. That's it. I can only do my part. I'm going to bring up one other thing, another, which is what I see a lot.

Well, I don't see a lot. That's not true. I do see it, but in different scenarios. But I'm going to bring up two. One thing, one other warning, and then another, and the other one is like, when should you speak. The last one I'm going to talk about is unasked opinions can damage relationships. Proverbs 1617 says interfering in someone else's argument is as foolish as yanking a dog's year. Okay. We all know people who will get in an argument. Friends will fight with friends. Family will fight with families.

And then they'll come and talk to you about it, which first of all, they shouldn't do that. They should mind their own business. they should never get involved in anything. If you get involved in somebody's argument, you're dumb. First of all, now you're participating in gossip. And it's not your job to resolve it. The Bible is very clear what you should do. You go, the two people that are offended go to each other, and if that can't be resolved, then they go to the leadership of the church.

They don't go to their family, and they don't go to their friends. And then hopefully it gets resolved. But that's not a lot of times what happens. And if you're so stupid that you do do this, I'm going to remind you the fact, first of all, it's high school. Middle school. Yeah. Elementary school. Yeah, I know.

It's very childish. It's very, and I can promise you this. I'll give you an example. Go ahead. I know you're going to say, do it. Tell them. Is like back in the day, personal experience. When you're dating somebody that's cheating on you and your friend goes,

and tells you that the person's cheating on you, you love that person at first. But then when you get back with your boyfriend, now you despise the very person that told you the truth and thought they were doing right by you. You despise them because now you and your boyfriend are against the world. That's what's going to happen.

If you have three friends, three girlfriends, this is famous Amos for this. three girlfriends trying to be friends and then they're all competing for each other's attention two of them are going to team up and one of them's going to be left out and then the two that were teamed up are going to end up not liking each other they're going to turn against the one it's a constant chaos and guess what then the two will get back together

and they'll hate you am I wrong no you I knew you're going to stay out of it I literally know And it's the same, like you go and tell your mom all these things you hate about your boyfriend. And then guess what happens? You and your boyfriend get back together. Now your mom hates your boyfriend. Right. And like it's always, like, you're resentful to your mother.

Right. Because she told you all these things. Oh yeah. There's no waiting people. Keep your opinion. They're going to make up. So leave them alone. Right.

Leave it alone. Just stay out of it. Say, go talk to them. We do that with our youth kids. Like our youth kids, there's always drama. They're 15 years old. There's always drama. And I'm like,

go talk to them. Who cares? Go talk to them. Figure it out or block them. And I'm their leader. I can technically be a part of this conversation. And I'm like, go talk to them. And even when they do, eventually they all are best friends by Wednesday.

Everybody always gets back together. That's what you think you're saving them. You're not saving squat. They're going to turn around and run you. And if they're coming to you with the drama, most likely they love the drama, so they're coming to you to continue the drama and you're enabling that bad behavior. But it feels so good to be needed. No, I don't, no, thank you.

See, again, another thought process that I'm like, I don't want to. No. I don't want to know. Like, I've done the three girlfriends thing. Me too. Me too. Me too. And unless it's godly, which ours was not, it's rough. It is.

It is. Godly ones, I'm sure can make it. Yeah. I'm sure they can. I mean, because there's balance. And there was no agenda. If you really like love each other, then you want each other to hang And everyone has the Holy Spirit.

Right. I mean, I know they work. I mean, but on the whole, no. I know. It's true. It's hard. The world's way, no. World's way, it's a recipe for disaster.

Stay out of it. If it smells, taste, and looks like high school, stay away from it. Yeah. True. Because it's no good. There's nothing good about it. Last thing is, when should you speak? And there are times, but biblically,

Biblically speaking, there's only three really good reasons. And I'm sure there's more, but I'm going to name you the top three, which is when you're asked, if you're responsible, and God specifically prompts you. That's the only time because otherwise you're not using wisdom. Wisdom is listening and not saying anything. Just listen. And that doesn't mean gossip. That means if somebody's coming to you with a genuine problem, and I don't really want to listen to somebody's problems where they're naming names.

I'll listen to people when they'll say, I'm having a problem with a friend, or I'm having a problem with this situation. I don't want to know who it is. I don't want to be involved in the other crap. Like, just give me the facts, and then we can go from there. The rest of it tends to be gossipy. And they're trying to have you form an opinion about somebody else so you'll side with them. Okay, stay out of that because it's sin. And what's going to happen is if it's a friendship,

you're not going to be friends with that person if it continues and it might ruin the other persons that you have the relationship with. Does that make, does that make sense what I'm saying? Absolutely. James 119 says you must all be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry. I've gotten way better with the latter. Way better. Notice the order in which this says it. Quick to listen, slow to speak. Shut up. That's what it's basically saying to you.

Shut up. You do have two ears. You're right. What is that? That's why we have two ears and one mouth. Because most people do the reverse, actually. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

That was me. Lots of words. Lots of words. Lots of unwanted words. Yeah. spiritual maturity shows restraint and one of the clearest markers of maturity is self-control of the tongue the tongue is very dangerous i'm going to give you three scriptures and it's proverb 13 3 which is those who control their tongue will have a long life opening your mouth can ruin everything people

need to pace that up somewhere proverb 1727 through 8 says a truly wise person uses few words a person with understanding is even tempered. Now, if you're not even tempered, then that means you have no understanding. When I read that scripture and I went, holy moly, I have got to be even tempered. Because that is, I would love for people to believe that I am a person that is wise. Right. Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent. With their mouths shut, they seem intelligent.

Okay, that's me, people. I can be a fool, but if I keep my mouth shut, people will think you're smart. You'll think you're smart. Isn't it really all, that's what it's about. It's all about. It's the mirage. I love Proverbs.

I love it, man. Proverbs. It'll save somebody's life. It can radically... It could change and save your life. My favorite proverb is stay out of your neighbor's house because they're going to hate you. That's true.

Spend too much time over there. Have you ever spent too much time at somebody's, else like back in the day when you had friends and you would always be over at their house and guess what you are you're welcome real quick yeah yeah especially with the parents proverbs 21 23 says watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut and you will stay out of trouble post that one up guys those three right there are huge and if we learn to apply them man we will be smart it's more than smart yeah like you're gonna be really wise yeah the Peace will follow and

Tranquility. Wife will look different for the best. Instead of drama, you'll have laughter. Right. Yeah. You won't miss it.

Joy. You think you will, but you won't miss it. And it's not your job. It's not your job to save everybody. I thought it was mine because I cared too much. Again, don't care for people

more than they care for themselves. Correct. And it's not your job. job to save everybody. It's your job to assist and disciple and love. But they have to want to be saved. So if they don't want it, don't force it. And you'll be so content. And give your attention to the people who do want to be. There's plenty of them. You know, disciples and changed and all of that. Oh yeah. The squeaky wheel, don't give it grease. Don't give it grease. It won't help you. It'll just move on to the next person after they've caused much conflict for you.

So that is all. We will see you on Wednesday of next week, Sunday. Be here. It's an hour earlier, people. Yes. Right. So you're going to have to wake up and put your alarm on. Just know that when you wake up, an hour.

It's probably dark. Can I tell you a trick that I do? Yes. And it's actually helped me. Wait. Okay. I'm ready. I turn all the clock.

back in my house around noon on Saturday. I turned them backwards or I turn them forwards so that mentally, yeah, you know, I know it is now an hour earlier. Right. So that when it happens the following morning, I'm not like, I've already prepared myself. I've gone to bed early. I've done all the things. Okay.

And when I wake up, it's actually that time. Not like, oh gosh, I lost an hour. I lost the hour on Saturday. What did I care? Yeah, at lunchtime. That brain was, it doesn't matter what is true. It's what she told herself. Right.

It's what she told herself and repeated. It's an hour earlier. I created a new, new path in my brain. You did. You absolutely did. Good job. Yes. So, even though my opinion is wrong, I've convinced myself that it is correct.

I'm trying for a funny story. I try talking to Pastor Tom about neuroscience. science on Sunday. Oh my gosh. He goes, Vanessa, are you reading books? Oh my gosh. He did. He did.

He wasn't interested. Was he interested? No, he wasn't ready for it. We have to keep bringing up in like bite sizes. We have to keep like kind of like. He was like. Did you laugh? Giggle.

Oh my gosh. She was like TikTok. Are you reading book? Did you say TikTok? Please tell me. No. Here we did. It's TikTok.

We said TikTok. So I was from TikTok. talk pastor tom he's never going to listen to you where do you think we get all of our information of instagram or tic-tok right always reals help me lord it's so funny all righty then okay we will see you soon be here on sunday live in person or live stream i know it's an hour early you're fine pull your thumb out of your mouth you can do it i don't like this day as much as you do as much as you don't that's what i should say much as you don't but we can do

it. We're more than conquerors in Christ. Literally. More than. Literally. So get up. Get your butt to church. Or you'll be it an hour late. And you'll just be in time for the message. That'd be terrible.

Be there. And you can take a nap in the afternoon. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I already do that. It's Sundays were made for napping. Right. I said, oh, yes. It's like the deepest I've ever heard.

Oh, my gosh. I did not say that, guys, by the way. I said, oh, yes. That was funny. See you on Friday before I put my foot in my mouth one more time. Bye. Bye.