The Horror Returns - THR - Ep. #264: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 (1986) Commentary

Episode Date: June 13, 2021

Our Super Patron Sean Henry joins us for a commentary of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2 this week. The podcast spotlight shines on Fatal Follower Presents. And we get feedback from Patrick Lear, Tim Davis, Steve Carleton, Two Chicks and a Horror Flick, Bo Ransdale, and Robert Ward AND WE HAVE 2 NEW 5 STAR APPLE PODCAST REVIEWS! Thanks to Horror4Life and Eve of Abyss. Please get us your names and addresses so we can send you your prizes! Thanks for listening!

Yes, hi, it's Bill Mosley, and you're listening to The Horror Returns. Goodbye. Greetings, victims. For those of you delight and dread, who fantasize about fear, who glorify and go. Welcome. You have found the place where the horror returns. Listeners beware. This podcast contains major plot spoilers and the foulest of language.

Join us in celebrating the old and the new, the best, and the worst in horror. All right, welcome back one and all to The Horror Returns. I'm Lance and with me as always are my co-host Kevin, Brian, and Philo And tonight, again, we're joined by our super patron and very special guest, Sean Henry. What's up, Sean? Hey, how's it going, guys? So, good. Yeah, thanks for coming back, dude.

Thanks for, I'm glad we finally got the first show together, finally, with evolution. That was a blast, and I appreciate you guys letting me be on again and talk about Texas chainsel mask or two. All right. Well, tonight we're going to kind of follow along. I'll try to keep the volume not too high, but I'm not sure if I have subtitles, so I'm going to have to at least have the volume up a little bit. So we're going to skip Cool of the Week. We're going to skip horror headlines in Trailer Park.

But since we got a couple of five-star reviews, I guess we're going to take it away, Phil, with the feedback. What? People are listening, man. So yeah, this week we got the podcast spotlight. It's going to shine on Fatal Follower Presents. Thanks to everyone for supporting our little spooky pod. Listen in for the new episode here, third episode.

F.F. Conjors, previous guest, Gabriel, back on the show, to recap some of the latest news and horror. First, we offer some exciting updates for Apple TV Plus, debut of Stephen King's Lise. story. Lance, you seen that? Yeah, I've read the book. I think it's pronounced Lizzie's story. I think so.

I don't think it's Licey. That would be a totally different story. Well, they also discussed Neil Blomkamp's demonic, the trailer, and detail the excitement of the comic book creative team of Al Ewing

and Ram V taking over Venom in November. then F.F. shines a light on his own macabrican collection, while promoting a few of his favorite boutique labels with VHSPS and Culture Shock releasing. So be sure to take notes. Lastly, the dynamic duo returned for one last final scare with the conjuring. The devil made me do it. Reaction.

listening as we attempt to rank and compare the conjuring verse and insidious verse respectively but which one will prevail damn they got a lot going on over there fatal follower have you listened Brian it's in the queue

there's so many great podcasts out there to listen to it's just really hard to keep up with yeah I I added it to the subscription queue this week too so I'll check it out. All right, and then Brian posted a poll

on the Hort Returns Group page. Check that out. Which is your favorite movie out of the Texas Chainsawmasker franchise? So far, the original is out in the lead with nine votes followed by the 2003 remake. What?

What? Part 2. Alex Hedron-Dadario's titties. I suspect had a play in that. Was that not the Jessica Biel one? Yeah, that's the Jessica Biel one. Yeah. Oh, okay.

I'm getting it mistaken with a different franchise, aren't I? Which one was the Alexandra Dodario? That was the 3D one. Ah, and for a very good reason. I didn't even watch that one. Yeah. You didn't want to see the chainsaw being thrown at the camera? Hell no.

It was awesome. I don't know what you got. are talking about. I saw it in 3D. Hella good. It was. It was hell of good in 3D. The blue ray now doesn't do it any justice. The story was a little, a little iffy at the end for me. Well, the secret's in the meat. That's what Patrick Lear said, right?

Yeah. Tim Davis says the real question is, what's the worst entry of the franchise? Oh. now there we have 3D 4th No the one with Oh

Yeah I find that one I find that one entertaining Because it's so bad That's a fun I hate it I hate it too I have it

But I hate it Fatal Fowler Presents Says thanks for sharing buddy well thank you sharing again regarding the Gaia trailer

Steve Carlton says reminds me of the last of us with the creature but that's not a knock looks really cool I'm excited about that one I think it's gonna be good yep I think that's gonna be

on some list this year hopefully we got happy pride month from two chicks and a horror flick All right. Shout out. There you go. Bo Ransdale says, thanks so much for the blue faux PG.

What does that mean? I think you meant the Psychogorman Blu-ray. Oh, the Blu-Ran for Psycho-Gorman. Okay, there we go. I just read them, guys. Sorry. Now I, too, like hunky boys. Good for you, Bo Ransdale.

Good for you. you at his pride months. She likes what? You haven't seen Psycho Gorman? Not yet. Oh, Nez. Come on, dude. Me either. I got a whole list of movies.

Yeah. Watch it. Watch it. You'll get the Hunky Boys reference. What's it on? Shutter. Okay. Robert Ward says, I was going to pick it up on Blu-ray

over the weekend, but tragically found that it was not available. Everyone keeps recommending. landing it and I want to see it, but it looks like I'll have to actually order a copy online rather than picking it up in person. Or just get shutter. Or you can

leave us a five-star review. There it is. We have a copy still available. Where you can get it for free. And speaking of five-star review, we do have two new five-star Apple podcast reviews. So PsychoGulmer may

or may not be available still. Okay, no one bit two. Horror for Life says one of the best horror podcast, period. This is by far one of the best horror podcasts out there. These gentlemen always come with the knowledge that is needed for an awesome conversation about horror movies, whether it's going back to the 70s and 80s, or talking about what's new and fresh they got it all. Each of them brings their own unique personality to the table, and they get right to horror talk. No nonsense.

I make to differ. I was going to say, really? Yeah, what podcast are they listening to? Plus, they are all sexy. Oh, that's facts right there. I don't know about them, but I am. Right now. Doing my Hulk Hogan pose.

For the wrestling returns. Love those accents. Subscribe to the podcast now. All right. I don't believe what you have been missing. Damn. That is awesome. Horror for life, thank you.

We need to know who you are horror for life so we can get you your Blu-ray. Hey, plus, if somebody's calling me sexy. Too sexy for our shirts. Oh, God. That must have been what happened to it. Ouch. Eva Babis says

More fun than a puzzle box of sadal masochistic demons. easily the highlight of my horror week, always providing funny and down-to-earth insightful commentary on a variety of films, trailers, and everything else good in the horror world. Well, thank you, Eve of Abyss. Be spitting up to the Blu-rays this week, huh?

And we'll probably be acting out a scene from, what are we going to do, Brian? The lost scene from The Fanatic? All I know is I'm Hunter Dunbar. Okay. I'm your dummy bar All right Well that's it for listener feedback this week

Of course our show Intro comes from Steve Carlton Ugly Geeks who we already mentioned once Our artwork comes from not so long And you guys are wrong You guys are totally wrong About Army of the Dead Because that movie was fucking awesome

Yeah you guys are my boys But It's not You're wrong They're trying to They're trying to like overanalyze the storywriting Of a movie about fucking zombies that are like Yeah I mean

In their defense I think it kind of happens Because they're going on their eighth year Or podcasting I think you kind of At a point you start analyzing stuff a little bit more Than you probably should have Instead of just going with it

make sense because I there's been times we might have went a little too far into a movie when we should have just like yeah

this movie's just yeah just have fun with it right I respect your opinions I thought it was amazing I had a dream last night actually

about some like there were two different sets of zombies one that just sort of stood there and you could walk by them if you didn't mess with them and then another that were hunting people.

And John Cena was there. Holy shit. Hon Solo and Lando Lando Calercian were there. Wow, this is a movie waiting to happen. If we were doing video, I got my John Cena shirt on right now.

Yeah. Go change your shirt. It was a weird fucking dream, man. It sounds like it, but very interesting. Yeah, you need to ask yourself why you're dreaming of John Sina. Uh-oh. It was more of the zombies.

John Sina was just there. Was he there to save you? I think he was supposed to be, but I'm pretty sure he got eaten. Okay. Did Dane Dahan make a appearance? No, that would have been fun. He might have confused him for one of the zombies. Yes.

I can see that. Yeah, he's like undercover. right but anyhow if you'd like to help the show please consider becoming a Patreon patron we'll let you pick the movies for a future show at any amount

and for $5 and more also pick a commentary for a future bonus show like tonight and if you have a chance please give us a five-star Apple podcast review and you may win a steelbook copy DVD if your name is selected and if we get three or more in the next three weeks,

you'll get us acting out a lost sing from the fanatic on YouTube. Oh, wow, fun. Yeah, you hear that, Sean? You know any friends? Did I have Apple? Yes, actually, I can definitely get on them and be like, hey, you do this.

I need to see this. Let's make it happen. How are we going to do this? You know what? We'll figure that out when we get there. Yes, we will. All right. That's it this week.

On to our featured attractions. This week, we honor our super patron, Sean Henry, by taking you through a commentary of the Texas chainsaw mask or two. Thank you. I'm super excited for this. Yeah, this ought to be a lot of fun. So hopefully we've all got it. Hopefully you guys have some.

subtitles. I'll play it where hopefully the audience whoever's listening along and uh oh, can you guys hear me? Yep. Yes. All right. Yeah. Okay. Again, it's going to be an interesting night. I'll go ahead and make sure everybody that's listening

knows there's a huge party going on here at the house. So it's always a party at Lance's house. Could be some people in and out of the garage while we're recording. We'll find out. So, where were we going to start at the one second, Mark, Philip? Well, let's, uh, hold on. This is a film that came out, uh, August 22nd, 1986, directed by Toby Hooper, screenplay by Toby Hooper and L.M. Kit Carson.

Uh, chainsaw-wielding Maniac Leather Face is up to his cannibalistic ways once again, along with the rest of his twisted clan, including a equally disturbed choptop. This time, the mask killer has set. His sights on a pretty disc jockey, uh, meet a stretch Brock. Is this Google? Yes,

it's always wrong. He teams up with Texas lawman lefty, uh, in right. To battle the psychopath and his family deep within their layer, a macabre abandoned amusement park. Let's get that IMDB.

I bet you it's short and sweet. Oh, that one's like, yeah, it is. It's one sentence. Here we go. A radio host is victimized by the cannibal family as a former Texas Marshall hunts them. There you go,

R&B. Yeah, they always do it. Is Dennis Hopper Academy Award winner? He should be. If he's not, I guarantee you no cocaine was harmed in the making of this movie. This stars Dennis Hopper,

the beautiful Caroline Williams, Jim Seidow is just as cook. Bill Mosley is Chop Top, Bill Johnson. Friend of the show. We're into the show, Bill Mosley. Yeah, Bill Johnson is Leatherface.

Ken Everett as Grandpa, then a bunch of other people. All right. Hit it. You already? Countdown 2-1 and then hit play? Yeah. All right. Three, two, one.

Is that too loud? No. And again, a Canon film. Cannon. Sean. I fucking love that documentary about Canada. Yes. Yes, electric boogaloo.

Oh, my God. That was amazing just because of the bonkers nature of all the shit. On the afternoon of August 18th, 1973, five young people in a Volkswagen van ran out of gas on a farm road in South Texas. Four of them were never seen again. The next morning, the one survivor, Sally, whatever, Enright is picked up on a roadside blood, kicked in screaming murder. Sally said she had broken out of the window. in hell, the girl grabbed a mad, mad table, babbled a mad tale of cannibal family, isolated farmhouse, chainsawed fingers, bones, her brother or friends hacked up for barbecue, chairs made out of human

skeletons, then she sank into catatonia. Texas lawmen monitored the month-long manhunting could not locate the macab farmhouse. They find no killers, no victims, no facts, no crime. Officially on the record, the Texas Chantan Ska never happened. But during the last 13 years, over and over again, reports of Bizarre and Grizzly Chainsaw mass murders have pre i can't persist all over across texas texas texas texas chancers has not stopped and haunts texas it seems to have no end so you're telling me this is a documentary niz yes based on a true story did texas sage i'masker's real bro i grew up next to the police but really quick when you see that canon

logo that's when you know shit's about to get real oh yeah real awesome uh yes By the way, Dennis Hopper Hasel won two Academy Awards. Holy shit. What else? Best supporting actor in 1987 and best original screenplay in

1970. Okay. Yeah. Also a director for awesome colors. Oh, yeah. You got to do that one at one point, Brian. Hey, Tom Savini. Ah, I've forgotten Savini did the makeup in this.

That's your friend. Another friend of the show. Your workout, buddy. Hell yeah. That's right. Dude, I haven't hit a gym since COVID started. I'll bet he's hitting the gym, though. That dude, man, for as old as he is, he definitely stays in shape.

Who saw this in the theater besides me? Not me. Not in the theater. What did you come out? I was six. 86. I was born in 86. Fuck.

I was. We went and saw that movie thrashing, that skateboard movie, then we went and snuck in to see this. Nice. That's a great double feature. That's awesome. But I remember seeing this on, you know, Saturday afternoon on whatever fucking TV channel they played it on.

Right. Because it was just so campy and fun. This is my favorite one out of all of them. Is it? Yeah, mine too. This is far and away my favorite. I don't know. that beats the original, but...

You don't think so? I think it's actually better than the original. I do, too. Yeah, it's kind of hard to compare the two because they're so different in tone. Yeah, just a person's choice, right? We all need to go to the gas station. Yeah, you've been saying that.

Pile into one of those little rooms and party. Well, you're coming out here to Houston's pretty soon, aren't you? you, Nez? Yeah, I'll be down there a couple weeks. Are we going to refight the Battle of San Jacinto

when you're here? Yep. Okay. We've got to get crawfish or whatever those things they're called. I love the glasses. Like, what kind of sunglasses are those?

Awesome. 1986? Oh, they have the eyeballs on, right? Can you drink whatever you want? No open containers in Texas? Oh, yeah, wait, it's Texas, baby. Is that a Shinerbach? That was a Shiner Bok.

It sure does look like it. Yep, absolutely. Oh, shit. Although that's not the national beer of Texas. That would be Lone Star. I like Texas Ridge. ZZ Top t-shirt. Gotta love it, huh?

I've never met her. She's never at any of the cons I go to. She is a good-looking woman. She seems to be on a lot of cons, though. Yeah. Really? What about the dude, what about the dude drinking the coffee? Does he ever make any cons?

I met him in Sacramento at Sinister CreatureCon. He was cool. Yeah? Check out that cell phone or that car. Yeah. They had daddy's money, right? Those were a gaze. Their car in 86.

When it was like $50 a second. Right, literally. Bick phone Bukham horns Hey I graduated from UT boys And I'm an A&M guy We used to be rivals

Now nobody cares Yeah I never really care to begin with This is a badass truck Yeah I always like those little Those bars in the back Oh, yes. Oh, see, that's sweet.

Mm-hmm. Pure American. On the back. Roll bars. Oh, man. And it sounds tough, too. I like how it sounds later on in the film. Philip, you've still got your Jeep, right?

Yes. Yeah, we put a little work into it. But, yeah, you got some roll bars on that, don't you? Yeah. He kind of comes with it. Take the top off and it's got roll bars that are already there. Part of the frame. What was up with a license play that said FACQ?

F-H-Q? What was the guy's name? Blowing holes in signs out the fucking side of the window. Right. What you do? Texas Battleland amusement park. That's an amazing place. We got to check it out when you're here, Nass.

I mean, I like visiting, but it's too flat for me out there. Texas. Yeah, I get lost. I never know which direction I'm going in. Yeah, it's a big state, man. There's apparently a lot of mountains like out in West Texas from what I hear. See, that's a kind of studio I want. Yeah, that's nice.

You mean that's not McNus Studios right there? I wish. Let me win the Powerball first. Maybe you could have her working for you too if you win the Powerball, huh? Did she do anything after this movie? She was in a bunch of movies. Really? Nothing huge.

The only thing that come to my mind is this and Legend of Billy Jean. Oh, that's right. She was in there for a second. Big titties. Woo! I like her accent. And it is really. real. That's how she sounds, too.

Right. She's in her 60s and she posts some risque pictures on Instagram every now and then. Yeah. She's still looking good, huh? Yeah, she does. Well, she was in Lepicon 3. Oh, my God. Were they in space in that one?

No, in Vegas. Oh. I remember when he was in the hood. Twice. The space one's the one where he came out of the that one dude's dick. I don't remember that I don't remember that

I'm so like oh no no where were these guys going it took all day weren't they supposed to be going to the Red River rivalry like the football game between Texas and Oklahoma

okay I think so maybe they got lost because Texas is so flat yeah they're super lost why they get on like the regular main highways I got on these back coats.

Because they want to die. They deserve all this. They just stop. Yeah. Well, it was funny because they passed a sign that said, like, the Battle of the Alamo and then, like, 10 minutes or 10 seconds later, they were past the one that said, Dallas and Mesquite 10 miles away. I don't think San Antonio is that close to Dallas.

Yeah, those are, like, huge distances between them. Oh, my God. this guy the guy that's leather phase he's going to be at uh um i think houston either houston or sacramento for one of these cons i'm going to i can't i'm pretty sure it's sacramento i can't finish creature con he's gonna be there we gotta make it what's the one in houston car the houston horror film festival i don't understand these movies i know it's a movie and you need to suspense how come no one ever stops and lets the other car back's up Yeah.

That would be the end of the movie. Or sidest wiped the back of that truck. Start shooting, you know, his revolver before now. Yeah. Shoot the tires. Yeah, like, just keep shooting because, oh, my God, reload. These guys are holding a pretty steady for him to chainsaw it all up. No, shit.

How long is this bridge? And, yeah. and he's got good balance to stand there and hold that. Those chancels are heavy. Oh, this is awesome. This is badass right here. That is a great effect, man. There's Tom Savini in action, right?

Fucking shivering trying to hold his fucking brain on. Wow. Just scoring out of the top. Oh, God, that was amazing. that car should have done stopped and flew off the bridge. Right. They said that's Texas. That must have been Louisiana.

That looked like the bridge that goes across Lake Pontchartrain going into New Orleans. I'm kidding. It's like a 25-mile bridge, right? Yeah, how many bridges that long are in Texas? Not too many, man. All right. This always threw me. Look how the interstate, how busy it is.

Right? They were on some little back road. Unless it flew off that top one. I don't know. I don't know, man. Analyzing. Look how short. That little bridge.

Oh, my God. There's no way. It had a 20-minute battle on a 10-thous bridge. It looks like the damn interstate is underneath them, and they just drove over it on a little dinky bridge. There's the glasses. Oh man, Dennis Hopper. Damn. Breaks my heart.

Look how young he looks, too. You guys got cowboy hats? Every one of us, man. And boots. And horses. We don't drive cars down here, except if we're going over bridges with maniacs with chainsaws.

I've ever got a hat I get a black one, like George Street. There you so. I did go through a cowboy. hat face. They probably want to make my side. They have a fat head. Yeah, see, they're talking about

the big game, right? That's the Red River rivalry. That's Texas versus OU. And that always happens, right? Am I right? Philip, you lived in Dallas, right? Yeah, that's at the Cotton Bowl. Yep, Cotton Bowl. It's just an accident. Raise the hail.

It's just out-raising hail. Oh, boys will be boys with chainsaw. Got to get updated, but it's good. Oh, perfect. I got it. I was like behind, and I just got it perfect now with the sound of hearing. And the volume's not too high, not too low? No.

Okay. It's like, I got it perfect. Oh, my God. Dude, you got to hate that fill up. you're late getting to a job, an electrical job, and there's a fucking mobile home that's like it's a double wide two lanes in front of you and you can't get around it. Here's a question. Do the law enforcement all wear cowboy hats or is it just movies? I think the high-

States do. I think highway. State troopers do. Yeah, and the Texas Rangers do, I believe. Yeah. Should be required. Because I'm looking at all those offices in the background, they all got cowboy hats on. Yeah, they look.

They look like state troopers. Yeah, the state troopers in Texas are pretty badass. Don't fuck with them. Put it in the press. Get it in the news. Any information about this accident. It's probably hot, too, down there. Oh, yeah.

It's always hot. Dude, it was almost 100 degrees today. We broke the seal on our six flags passes today, Ness. I took the granddaughter to splash down to the water park. I thought you meant the regular park. I don't know. That's too hot. It felt good getting in that water, man.

That's cool. I was in the attic today. It was... Oh, yeah. Sorry. Oh, God, I'm sorry. Oh, yes. I went to Universal Studios in July.

in July a couple of years back. That was awful. What's that? I went to Universal Studios in July a couple of years back, and that was god-awful. People were passing out in the lines. Oh.

It was bad. It was bad. It was December one-time. And it was very comfortable. He looks drugged out in his mind. Coked out. Yes, excuse me. What are those for your young listeners?

Yeah, what is that? That she's holding? Oh, my God. Cassette. Really quick, those guys are out in the hall those cowboys. With your boot cut pants, do you cover your boots or do you stuff your jeans in your boots? I used to always stuff my jeans in my boots when I wore them back in. I don't think I've worn boots since high school.

Oh, no. I always put the jeans over the boots. Yeah, I only do that when I go out. Damn. Yeah. Right. What's he drinking? Dose.

Cubs. Two worms. Right. Is that real? Yeah. Pretty sure that's two worms. Yeah, it did. Those worms are gone.

Oh, my God. You already ate one of them. Yeah. It looks like that. Just chase it with a cigarette. So what happened in Poultergeist. Yeah. Oh, shit.

I'm glad I don't smoke anymore. Oh, you used to smoke now? Yeah, back in the day. Dude, I picked it up again. What a nasty habit, man. I got to quit. I started smoking again about six months ago. So did you?

Yep, and I quit for five years. Oh, man. Dude, me, too old. Don't be smoking. Tell me about you back. I actually need that big ass beach bag for. Oh, no, shit.

One little cassette. Bag is as big as she is. And those awesome denim boots. I like those awesome denim shorts. What is he doing? There's another shiner. Look at. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Building a french fry house how much of that cost just a lot of fries yeah what's this guy's name it looks like it's like Dwight yoke him does like his name is lefty no left no yeah stretches her right these i got to look it up is it LG yeah LG okay Jimpeters. Little fry

house. Texas Oklahoma chili goes off. God damn it. Texas doesn't win that one every year. That's word of God. That's what I don't love

Oklahoma. I've been there a few times. Does real chili have beans or not? That's nasty looking chili. Chili can have beans, right? I'm asking you guys. I don't know if that's it.

Way in, man. See, that's a kind of setup we need. Right. Look at a microphone. I think one of those is a Texas Frightman. Yeah. That's a great idea, man. I ain't carrying the rest of the equipment.

That big Ghostbusters backpack thing. I'll bet we get a lot more sound bites carrying that around, huh? Yeah, with the ring announcer's mic. That is. my God. Actually, we should carry that around, right? And then people who love the movie that wouldn't give us a sound bite normally probably would, right? Yeah. Or that jacket, too. Yes. I was happy that they brought, they brought him back.

Right. It was a hard-shell pepper corn. Hard-shell pepper corn. Sports code is just getting covered with chili. Something out of the back. That would be a cool microphone to carry around, man. I think we should totally do that. I think you got a great idea there, Philip.

I use a microphone and a small little Zoom recorder and you'll be good. Cut right chainsaws. That count looks like the gas station you were talking about, Naz. Riser and marching band. I know. What is up with that? Where are they going? Practices. For the big game.

Right beside the railroad. Yeah. They must be a football practice. Hey, you assholes. In between the railroad and the chainsaw shop. Yeah, I'm going to say, do they have chainsaw stores down there? I think we would get a Home Depot for a chainsaw. I'm a little disappointed.

it if you guys don't. I don't know. I've got an electric chain saw. But that that sucker cut a, I cut a tree down at my mom's house with it. Electric. Come on.

How long are those snacks been hanging there? They're definitely expired. Still there to this day. Uh-oh. I don't fool with chainsaws, man. I saw one kickback on one of my friends. I'm like, no, I'm good.

Yep. They're scary. Yeah, I had one kickback on me one time. Did you? Yeah. Last time I used one. And that was it. This, my brother.

Now you just paid somebody to cut the tree down, right? Yeah. Just leave that shit. Put down, what, like about 1,000? It was all hundreds. Looks like it. That's one expensive chainsaw, huh?

Well, he leaves with a few of them. Does he? Because he's got like two. I know he has two hanging from his side, then he's got one big one. Yeah, he's got the little, the small one. Yeah.

He's going to get the big boy one and then the little nuggets. Even these little ones are heavy. It's like ash. Yes. Oh, my God. Those things would be heavy. Definitely something I can swing around.

Dual wheeled. There you go. Yeah. You know, just in case I ever get into a duel. Chains all. Oh, here comes the train. Where's the market? The guy that's working there is like, Sheriff, you got problems, man.

No receipt. Just leaves the money and rolls out. Just left the cash, huh? Why was it a big gas in there? What? Yeah. I'm going to say that too. You leave chainsaws up on the wall with gas in them? What? It's Texas, Sean. It's Texas.

Oh, my God. Everything goes down there. Clearly. We haven't worn gas here in the last 13 months, okay? Well, as long as you get your chainsaw got gas in it, you're all right? Don't think that's how you use a chainslaw. my kid banana what the hell I mean you don't really need to swing it like that

if you're going to kill someone it doesn't seem like it's a very good idea just touch him with it nez if Dennis hopper says this is how you use a chainsaw this is how you use a chainsaw okay Dennis hoppers never use a chainsaw on his fucking life

look at the kickback he's getting because it's going right back up on him And this is awesome. A radio station with a gun shop right below. How come they to run downstairs and get guns when all of it? I just noticed it. I just noticed it. I want to ran downstairs and grab some guns.

Fuck yeah. Or this is Texas. How come they don't have guns up in the radio station? L.G. I got a guy. Five beer. More guns than people in Texas. That's for sure.

sure. Well, I want a Lone Star beer when I get there. I've only had the Texas Redd whatever they sell at. Loan Star's a good beer, man, but you've got to try that Shiner Bach, what they're drinking in this movie, which I'm sure that they got them all free, which is probably why they're prominently showing them.

Yeah, Shiner's badass. Lone Star is a disappointing. Yeah, that's for the tourists. Yeah, that's for the tourists. I've only, my knowledge of Lone Star beer is that's what Sheldon's dad drank and young Sheldon.

Like going to Mexico and drinking Corona. Corona's piss beer. Exactly. I'm drinking Corona right now. Why? You're better than that, man. Oh, man.

And the malls to stop trying to shut me up. Uh-oh, uh-oh. I had a little hiccup with my Wi-Fi connection. What, what are you guys at timewise right now? We're going to do this alone.

He's still talking to her. I need your help. I'm at 2530 right now. You're good. Okay. I think that sounds right. Close enough, huh? Whatever it is,

had the voices about synced up. Okay. You can call me stretch. Mr. Enlap. You can call me lefty. You can call me lefty. You're nice doing business with you. See you later, crazy man.

Good. It's funny. It's supposed to be in Texas, but it's K. Okla, right? Like Oklahoma? Why does she have this giant bag? Good question. He's going to the beach. It looks like she has a blanket with her.

He's crazy this shit. It wins every year, huh? That thing's still full of chili. quest we're doing this afternoon in tonight. We stay listeners know we're playing this every hour. She has a nice radio voice. Yeah. Now that's a good. Tatry and Barbot, though.

True. Man. When I met her, oh, my heart. Oh, yeah. You had to change your pants, didn't you? Yeah. I'm on a whole she is. But, man, she's still sexy.

She was hell of nice, too. That's why I loved about her. You met her in Dallas, right? Yeah, I went so. escape from New York. That's right. The night before the Friday. Look at those radios.

Antannas and all. Yeah, right. Shit, if my Wi-Fi goes down again and in hiccups, I may need an antenna for this cell phone. No C-Jills. I'm watching the movie on a cell phone. Oh, you are? Oh, my God.

Not that cell phone, though. The last round up. I wonder Well, I guess they couldn't find anyone Well, shit, they went to the house When what's her name got away in the first one Right I'm surprised he's still able to run around

Because I'm sure They realize and they know who lived in that house When the cops went there You would hope so, right? Especially if the Texas Rangers were involved, right? He's clapping. Nobody's clapping. Somebody's hitting a watermelon over here.

I told you there's what's going on. They're about to cut up a watermelon for everybody. Do you hit it first before you cut it? I guess. That sounds good. I didn't even know that. Hey, it's a Texas thing, I guess, right? A res thing.

We just busted on the back of the truck. You dig in. I thought we did it in my grandpa's house. We never had a night. you just broke it over the tailgate and start eating. Whatever work. There you go. I like her real colored hair because she's blonde now.

I mean, I'll still take it, but I don't like the blonde hair. So the blonde is her natural color or this is? No, this is. Why does she die blonde? She lives in California now. Everyone's blonde. Right. And fake tits and everything.

everything, huh? Yeah, I guess. I don't look at those. Only when I'm in L.A. There's none of that at where I'm at right now. Was this a rock station or a... I assume it was like it. Well, she was wearing a Zizi Top t-shirt.

And she had the ZZ-Z-Top Eliminator album. Ah, there you go. In the back really quick. I love that album. Texas music then. Are they from Texas? Yeah. Oh.

Yeah, hell yeah. I didn't know that. Yeah, one of them used to live down here in Galveston. All right. Hello. Can you guys grow the Zizi top beards? I can't. I have a son-in-law that's got a beard that he's competing with him pretty hard.

Can you grow one? Hell no. I'm trying to grow a beard. It all comes in gray now. I can't either. It just looks like pubes glued on in my face. Mine does too, but I grow it anyway. Now I once it starts hitting my chest when I look down.

It's a little in the way. Are they still have typewriters? I haven't seen one in a long time. Yeah, I don't think so. Just do it all on your phone now. Oh, look, back in the background, there's another Shiner Beer poster. Yeah, Shiner Beer definitely helped promote some of these. this movie. I'm sure they provided the beer and they agreed to put the posters in the,

and in the bottles. And there's another ZZ top. I didn't like that. That was an album after Eliminator. I didn't like that one. Whatever, whatever was after Eliminator. I didn't like that album. Yeah, made the, the car look like the space shuttle or something like that over the earth. So I want one of those clocks in here. It's all bright around it. I used to have a neon Budweiser clock when I was in college. I worked for a grocery store, man. The vendor said, hey, you want to take it? I said, hell yeah, I'll take it.

Put it up in my apartment. It, like, took up almost a whole wall and one wall of my apartment. That's not a bad idea, man. I like it. I thought this is a video game play, so I would come home with, like, stupid cutouts of video games. I always had big plans for them and then I'm like,

I don't have anywhere to put this fucking thing. It'd be great if he'd let you take an actual video game console home, right? I know. Chop top. And one of the best characters in all of horror, in my opinion. I love yes.

I love that he sells the little metal headpieces at his table that he signs. Right. I didn't realize this was Bill Moe. At this time, I didn't know who the hell Bill Mosley was. I think it was a house of a thousand corpses when I was like, this guy sounds familiar.

Absolutely. That's where I put two and two together also, man. Yeah, then I went back and I realized it was, he was him. And I was like, oh, fuck. He does this every now and then at cons where he dresses up like this. No shit. And does the photo ops.

Oh, man. Yeah, it's my favorite character, man, that he's ever done. This was his second movie. Was it? Yeah. I just re-watched Honey I blew up the kid. He's in that for like a second. Are you serious? He was one of the FBI

guys. He's in your favorite Clint Eastwood movie. Which one? Pink Cadillac. Oh, fuck. Piquette. I don't even remember that. I just remember I hated it.

I love Bernardette Peters, but I didn't like that one. Bernardette Peters. I haven't heard that name in a long time. I just watched the jerk the other night. Oh, that's a classic, man. I'm opt-e grabbing it. Oh, boy, okay. Born a poor black child.

Yes. All I need is this remote control? Is this chair? The Lord loves a working man And don't never ever trust Whitey Shit Shineola You're gonna be all right

I remember when this first came out Everyone was saying that this with this Top top was the hitchhiker I was like that can be Mie got Redover by semi Right. It was D-O-A. I mean, they're in the same family, though, right?

Like, aren't they all related somehow? X? I'm pretty sure everybody over there's all related somehow. Right. All in the family. Yes. I thought this part was the only part that was really, like, really, like, suspenseful and scary at the time.

Really? Yeah, because once it got going, it just got funny. It got silly, yeah. because I think that this was the part that got like the biggest screen in the whole theater. I was always wondering, what the fuck's he doing with that hanger? Yeah, why does he keep lighting it, right? It's scratching his head. At least it's sanitary.

You can hear it sizzling on his head. You're burning the flesh and eating it. What's with all the buttons he's wearing? See, he's got like a... peace button and all this other shit that he's wearing. I figured he was killing the lice. Is that what he's doing? And eating the lice?

I think those buttons are his flare. Yeah. Oh, it's flare. You're not wearing enough flare. It's a required amount of flare. He's part of Philip, is he part of Lysie's story? There you go. She's being an awfully patient

with him. It's like she's not running for the exit. Oh, oh, that is awesome. I love the original. I love the original Gunner Hanson. I loved how Gunner Hanson looked,

but I love this mask. Oh, yeah, but he's going to get really horny pretty soon, right? Yeah. Yeah. All the long places.

This is sunny bono wig. Yeah, those little metal plates, he signs of those at his table and sells them. Oh, my God, that's awesome. Pull the skin off. Ow How. Fucking. Dog will hunt.

What hell is that song? Oh, Jerry was a race car driver from Primus. Oh, that's right. Primus. Yeah. They're doing, if you heard about their new tour, they're doing, they're doing the Rush album of Farewell to Kings.

Yeah. Unfortunately, it's the, The week that AJ has us going to Nashville for vacation. It's like a week before the Frightmare, I think. So I'm going to have to miss him. Philip, I sent you a text about it, remember? Oh, yeah. God, look at it, man.

That's shit going on all the time, dude. Yeah, I know, man. We don't get, we don't go to enough live concerts, though. I don't know. He was not going to cut through that metal door. Hell no. Give up on it. I read some,

thing that this mask was the inspiration for Nick Foley's Mankind mask. Oh, that makes sense. That's what I read. I don't know if it was true, but I was like, all right, cool. Makes perfect sense. There's L.J. What's his

name, LJ or LG? LG. Big ass Cadillac. See, those trucks are tough. Yeah, I like that. He's got a couple of, what, drive-thew dackeries there? Do you guys have those drive-through liquor stores in Texas? They have been Louisiana.

I don't think we have them in Texas. Do we, Philip? I think there's a couple. There's actually a drive-thru Dackery Place down on a surfside beach. That sounds amazing. Delicious. Drink a drive down there. Yeah, they definitely went to loud on Florida.

There's too many retards already. It's not happening, huh? No, fuck, no. California, that ain't happening. All we got is drive through coffee and cigarette pickups. Right? Oh, shit. Lick my plate, you dog dick.

That's a great line. Yes, it is. Boy, I love this. It's just... Babe. Oh, oh, oh. The wife's in the garage, guys. Oh.

Oh, you know. Okay. Not want to feel this. Man, that is a brutal death. I'd rather get shot. Yeah. Then repeatedly just blows to the head. Fuck that.

Because you could just feel every, just blow to the head from my hammer. I think it's already all. Hey, babe. Look at all the Shiner Shiner beer boxes. Oh, Mountain Dew. Those are the old school ones.

I like it. Yeah, that's awesome. Old school Shiner. Hey, where's the world? Those are those little ice big clamps. To pick up the ice block or something? Yeah, the big ice block.

You're fucking frozen. Yeah, Shinder was heavily involved in the making of this movie, right? Seems like they're finesse. A Shiner beer production. You guys see like, whoa. I forgot about that.

It crashes through the wall. Was this the scene that was in the burbs? Yeah. Yeah. Tombeg couldn't sleep. He's still hitting that guy on him with the hammer. How many? He's still twitching.

Yeah. He's just... Oh, big red. Like, why don't I have all this soda in there? Big red is gross. That's a can full of sugar. Oh, yeah, big red's the worst, man. Oh, they drink on the Reds in Arizona's Big Red.

I got a big red since I was a kid. Oh, I think I've ever had a big red. Like, how sticky did she feel when this all dried up? Nothing sexual about this shot, huh? No, not at all. That's shiny. When I was in high school, we were... Let's back that up a minute.

I drew a picture of a leather face. I know I have it somewhere in my art stuff. It was like a quick picture. I think they only gave us like a minute or two. So I just did what I could really quick. It looks crappy, but seeing this, I remember that's what I did. See, I like the way his mask looks in this. I do, too, man.

Yeah, he's like a horny teenager. Right. Uh-oh. Putting up those sticky thighs. That's wet. Oh, yeah. Man-kind. Mankind.

Yeah. No one's looking. It's naughty time. Checking it out. I like how we're all getting quiet for this scene. I take it that blade's not sharp. This suspense is killing me. It's going to go slow and steady.

Look how brand new that blade is, too. And no blood or anything on it. I guess she gets into it. Uh-oh. Gigri, gigri. Licking his lips and that tooth. Just don't turn it on right now, right? Oh, my God.

A whole different movie. No kidding. I like this part. He's good. It's about to get. I'm ready to blow. He's almost there. Yeah.

he's shaking and everything he's ready to blow right there yeah crank it up his jizzing his pants sorry ladies sorry ladies oh man

Animal. Just kind of beer. He was really angry with that cardboard box. He found love. A little shimmy did it get. You got to do that. I liked in summer school when Chantaw did that dance. Right.

They came running into the classroom. Oh, my God. I haven't seen that movie in forever. And a while. Don't call me Francis. man he's gone I got a big gut man but I never tuck my shirt

in my jeans just because you look like that man stole some records I was what's he got in his bag is that what it was he's got albums in it yeah

it never clicked until now that that was Bill Mosley that's awesome yeah would you say Brian his second role ever huh? Yeah God, how much do you think he got paid for this role, as iconic as it is now? $1,000.

At the most, right? Like, minimum wage, pretty much, right? Free beer. Yeah, all the shiner he can drink. That's why those boxes were emptied in there, we're cutting open big reds. He got to keep the records, you said, Brian? Yeah, I see. Is that fine young cannibals?

is it I think I don't like that one song That's a way back machine That's me crazy That's the one song I like that Other than that I can care for the rest of it Is that the one where they're dressed up as chickens in the video

No I Which one am I thinking of? I don't know There's a video where they were all dressed up in chicken suits I don't think it was that That might have been my dream about John Cena

the zombies, huh? Oh, speaking of that, just see my shirt? Yeah, I gave you a special emoji. That's my weekend shirt. Don't change it until Monday. I've always wanted a Jeep. No top. I'm just mobbed down.

Oh, yeah, Philip loves his Jeep. Yeah, that's pretty cool, man, but the top of... Definitely had a few problems with... I'm shit. I, Hey, I smacked a fly that was on the windshield and broke the fucking windshield. Remember that, Philip?

Yes, yeah. Oh, my God. Those things are like breakaway windshields, right? Well, they're like straight up and down. You hit them, there's no, like, glancing blow. It's just straight up. Right. There's the Texas Battle, Ann.

All right, I got a story for you guys about this place where they filmed it, for real? this was a restaurant between Austin and Dallas called the Matterhorn Restaurant. Philip, do you remember it, or are you too young to remember? I've heard of it. My dad used to take us there, and it was the most fucking surreal restaurant in the world, because you go inside, and it's like you're inside some kind of a cave, and they have like a swimming pool there with, like, performers, like divers and shit like that. What?

Yeah, they had a bar set up, and I'd, I remember my dad would always order a grasshopper. I'm like, what the hell is that? It's like crem to meth and ice cream. And I tried it and I'm like, that's the nastiest thing I've ever tasted. But they had a full-scale restaurant in there, like performers. And I think they even had like a couple of rides in there,

like a little mini Ferris wheel and shit. Really? Yep. It was super, super weird, man. How did it stay in business for? Not very long, no. They invested a lot of money into it, and they didn't get it back. She should have just went to the cops after she knew where they were.

Well, I think they filmed this right after they tour it down, because this is kind of like what was left after they shut it down. But look it up, the Matterhorn restaurant in Texas. There's like some kind of a weird Texas road trip website you can go to where they talk about it. very bizarre place how come they didn't see the headlights I don't know kind of hard to dance right

like right behind them it's lefty right here watch so she goes falling into the ground right how come that truck didn't fall through there good question good question

well I guess it could have drill right over this hole he used her as bait I do use you, girl. How did he not like that? He couldn't find anything else. Skeletons don't work that way. It would have fell apart.

All right, guys, y'all, go ahead. I'm going to walk away for about five minutes to sing happy birthday. I'll be right back. This is when we talk about Lance. Okay. then the shorts are pretty nice yes they are these are the type of amusement

parks that they just don't do anymore to get like Wonderworld Dangerous types Yeah We don't get no more action parks or whatever I know Oh I begged it for Seen many of Carnival

That look like they are put on by hillbillies Carnival I was watching a doctor Carnivals, yeah. Carnivals are safer than the big amusement parks, only because they... What? This is what they were saying,

statistically. Because you could take... They take those things apart, and the maintenance is more regular than at a big giant amusement park. I don't know. That's just what they were saying. I don't know how truthful that is, but...

I feel like they strip and, like, clean and do better maintenance on the amusement parks than the carnies do, because the carnies are like, ah, I don't give a fuck. Let's break it. down and put it back together and half-assed

Where's my MET? Exactly. Although we did Six Flags have a A flaming spark that fell out of something

Right before they sent it off and people said to put the fuck out. Did he just set the phone by the microphone? They're trying to be hiding from everyone. They're sure a lot of lights. Oh, that's them. Yeah, I was like, wait.

How many people does he have over there? Sound like somebody scored a touchdown. You know, I really feel like if you're... Like, maybe the chainsaw is not the best weapon, but at least he's got a backup, I guess. You should be rolling there with guns. Right. Oh.

It's not lefty style. Oh, random side note. You know what I found out today? The wonderful world of airbows. It's like an air gun that shoots an arrow. Like, you can kill a big ass hog with one. Holy shit. That sounds amazing and dangerous as fuck.

Right here, they must have just filled this wall. full of blood and gut It looks too fresh Yeah Gizards I bet it just stunk too All that looks real Not human guts

Probably like animals It'd heat up Sit there for a couple hours Get that wonderful stench about it I wouldn't just start cutting things Bringing the roof right down on top of you making sure they don't get out I would have went in there with guns and dynamite

and just blew up everyone I would have gone in there with a SWAT team but it never works good in movies they don't believe they won't believe you they won't believe you they won't believe you

how bad is this in here body parts and sausage hanging out. I always feel bad for LG right here. And just all the hammer blows of the head

and then gets his face cut off. Maybe that's like the smoke house. Probably smells really good. These movies always make me want barbecue. I mean, I know it's humans. You cook it good enough and the

sauce is good. I'll eat anything. You're talking about Texas barbecue? Like, how many people went missing? Because that looks like a lot of people hanging there. Yeah, no shit. Well, there's body parts laying all over in there. It's

a total waste of meat if it's not like... Is it at least refrigerated? No, it's like a big room. Oh, come on, man. They gotta at least freeze it, right? I don't know.

I love this town. That's the whole barrel full of guts or whatever's in it. Oh, wow. I'd have been gagging. I was trying to hide. You guys ever had tripas? You know what that is? No, like the tribe.

Oh. No, it's really good, man. You can have Tripas tacos. but the secret is to cook it, really cook it good. You got to get extra crispy. So you just got to cook the guts down. Well, actually, first you got to get a water hose

and get all the shit out of it. And once you clean all the shit out of it, then you fry it. No, I'm serious. God's selling me. All right. That reminds me. When I go to my grandmothers, I don't eat it anymore. I can't.

When they butcher sheep, I can't eat it anymore. It's good stuff, though, man. They take the shit tube and they'll tell us, here, go drain this. And I'm like, what? They go, drain it out, get all the shit out, and hook it up to the end of the hose and turn the hose on so it washes it all out. Then they get it, they slice it up, and they wrap it around the, the sheep fat and fried up.

In Navajo language, it's called etch eat. I used to eat that shit all the time when I was down there. Now I can't eat none of it. Not anymore, huh? It just stinks. If there's any of you Navajo's listening, you probably hate me right now, but I'm a city boy.

I can't eat it no more. It sounds like haggis, like the scotch. Yeah, it's kind of like haggis, right? No, I'm good. No. Poor LG. Any, any, any, any, any food that starts with wash the shit out on my...

Yeah, immediately tapping out. Just show it to him. There's a giant meat cleaver. Like that stuff hanging there's got to be rotten. Yeah, it's got to be by now. Fresh blood all over his head. Right? His hands got to smell like death incarnate.

Sorry, girl, I got you. Death and carnate. Shoot. I loved how he just beat him all the time, even in the first one, when he was beating him with sticks. Did he say eyeball patte? Yes, sir. Did you say coon shit?

Jesus. Yes, he had to. You add salt. Salt makes everything taste better. Oh, my God. Let me just put this on you first. Yeah. Hey, do you.

A big mask. He is your buddy. He is wit. Look what I got. How did that feel? How did it smell? We should ask Tom Savini about all this, huh? that dude has done that

Savini has done makeup for so many fucking movies though it's like I wouldn't even know what to ask him if we actually got an interview it's like where do you start with somebody that legendary you know I start with Donna dead then I dive into Friday the 13 then I dive into the Bernie and this

you guys know he got a lot of that stuff from his Vietnam days Yeah. Is that true? Watch that documentary. Okay. He's seen a lot of stuff over there. Yeah, it was a lot of combat action that was

that fucked him up and he turned it into something positive. That would, those would be the questions I wouldn't ask. Just nothing about the war. Unless he brought it up, unless he brought it up. I couldn't ask anyone. Yeah, because all the documentaries I've seen where they talk about it, that's like real brief. Mm-hmm.

Understandable. This... Well, he may be removed enough from it now. Yeah. Could be. All that dust on that chainsaw to have stopped. Right. What about you, Philip?

You got any horrific war stories to share with us? Oh, no. No. No. Not really. A few mortars. A little fuel truck. That was about it, huh?

Let me guess. A lot of drinking and playing poker waiting for shit to happen, right? Not so much. It was kind of hard to get alcohol. I had to have my wife send me like vodka and a listerine bottle.

How real was that one movie, Jarhead? Yeah, that sounds about right. Okay. That was a lot of it. A lot of it. Never seen it. especially among Marines

yeah they're always trying to fuck each other's wives yeah oh gee took his face off top of his hand and his arm Ouch He's still alive He's still alive

He said that took a long time for them to put it on him Did it? Yeah I talked to him about this Right yeah he still that's such badass makeup work but it's so like

oh he probably can't even feel it he's so heads probably all just you know if this came out now a lot of this would probably be CGI right oh it would be oh it would be

even his chest took a piece off oh yeah your shoulder Oh my God This is all the way that was belly They got the prime John Oh god

Does he got the beer label on his boxer shorts This guy is beer Are you serious? Am I just read Oh that just says Texas Never mind Is boxers say Texas That's some respect

See still trying to help. Mm-hmm. Oh. Oh. She's just hanging out too still. All the ribs are probably keeping in all the guts.

I think that gut portion is worse than the rib portion. Yeah. She should have just put him out of his misery. Mm-hmm. Yeah. A little bit on the back of the head. What was the point of just skinning, bits of him.

That's all they need. If you're making barbecue, wouldn't they waste no part of the animal? Well, you could see from the surroundings they waste quite a bit. Yeah, they do. They would definitely

go out of business quickly. Make him his face back. Oh, man. Oh, poor guy. Like, cut off his and then you push it back on.

Like, let me glue it back on. You're good. She's pretty much far gone by now. All this stuff she's gone through up to this point. Right. And this cowboy hat. I'm sure it just stinks in it. I feel like piss and shit as well.

See all those. like thighs and legs hanging down off hooks. And the waist of sausage. Yes. That's what I'm saying. This has got to be the smoke house. They're just like hanging it there and letting the... She'd be coughing.

She'd be coughing and hacking if that was a smoke. You would think so. That's true too. Yeah. Maybe they're making beef jerky. Oh, God. That's, uh... They're making truck stop beef jerky.

farmer Vincent oh man that hey that is that's some beautiful set design there though guys yeah that is that's an awesome awesome set design right there all right as a patron I say we do a commentary for a motel hell

have we done that one yet Brian I think we did we reviewed it we haven't done a commentary all right so it's fair game yeah Darren remember he sent us that awesome photo show That's right. The three of us were being made in the sausage.

Yeah, Darren, what's up in the Photoshop? We need some more Photoshop's, Darren, if you're listening. Yeah, Mike, if you're making, you're quick at that, too. See, now I want sausage. Look at all that hanging in the background. You don't want that sausage. Again, put salt and barbecue sauce on it. I'll eat anything.

Philip What's that town we stop at When we go to Dallas Look at the dude roasting in the background There's a whole body Oh Cinterville Centerville

Sinnerville Guys best beef jerky Is that when you got that What was it? Ghost Pepper I think so I bought Buckees

Beef jerky Oh yeah That could be pretty Yeah Buckees is garbage loves truck stop really good yeah loves does that we have that in california yeah i like buckies no i like the store but their jerky sucks yeah it's not the same as centerville what's the place in centerville call phillips uh woodies woodies do you guys listen to want to send us beef jerky

give us we'll try it all i know on the padded room podcast they have people send in like hot sauce and shit a lot. I don't do hot sauce. I'll do jerky. It can't be hot jerky. It's got to be mild. Oh, no. They had a listener send in some beef jerky that was like ghost pepper jerky. Yeah. Send that to know. No way. I don't do hot sauce.

I do. I only do hot women. I made some buffalo wings tonight. They were awesome. grilled them up. Oh, that sounds amazing, dude. That does sound good. There's no good barbecue places in this town I live in.

I could probably throw a rock and hit 12 good barbecue spots from my house. I want to go back to that one place. Wolfies, right where we got the crawfish? Yeah, that's what I want again. That shit was good. Yeah, Wolfies is pretty good. What the fuck is that? Is that like a fire extinguisher?

Yeah, I think so. lost in there. She don't know how, she fell in, so she doesn't know how to get out. Right? Calm land. What was that? Is that the movie or your house, Lance? That's our house. Did you all guys hear a happy birthday earlier?

You heard somebody score the big goal or something. What was a little dummy's name? the little dummy I don't know man they gave it a name I can't remember someone's why yelling at us I know somebody's yelling at us

come on Sean you should know oh I don't even know shit is it one of those guys we gotta find out he says that when towards the end when he's when the cook is under the table

he says the name of the dummy yeah because he gets it and he pulls that grenade out you guys have all seen Spiral right from the book of saw yeah hell of good what is the name of that pig pig puppet mister it has a name

they're selling the puppet now it's such a weird name too like Mr. Puffy or Mr. fuck I can't think of it and now I know Mr. Pig What was this guy's name?

Was it Mr. Belvedere? No. Oh, my God. It should be. That'd be great. What was the wheelchair guy's name? The first one? Sally and...

Billy. No. You're just having everybody yell at us now. Sally and it wasn't Arnie. Oh. Miss. Mr. Snuggles, I think, is the new one. Franklin.

Yes. You both are correct. Mr. Snuggles and Franklin. Okay. All right. Really quick. So when they escaped their house in the first movie, leaving everything behind,

they made sure they grabbed Franklin in his wheelchair and took off. That's family for you, man, right there. And the batteries lasted. When did that first one come out? What, 74? Maybe they replaced the batteries as tribute every year. Yeah. Those batteries lasted over 10 years because the first one was 74 and this was 86.

Oh, my God. Man, and dude, guys, this was all filmed on that fucking, that restaurant, the Matterhorn restaurant, after it closed down. Yeah, I'm sliding down the slide. stuff. I was thinking that's what you're talking about. You know what? It would be fucking amazing. Is it still there I wonder? Or is there anything left there? It's probably gone.

Yeah, because somebody would have made money off of it. Although the fucking Astrodome is still sitting there with nothing going on at all. The original Astrodome? The original Astrodome? Yeah, the original. Why wouldn't they turn it into a museum

or a hockey rink or something? Well, one down there, I want to see it. you can't go in there It's a total disaster It's just sitting in the parking lot of NRG I just want to see it I mean from what I heard there's rats And everything else in it

Yeah She's probably not even structurally sound anymore I don't know what the fuck they're doing This tunnel she's running down That's the matter horn man It always reminds me of that That movie fire in the sky

When the aliens are dragging that dude down that tunnel and there's all kinds of garbage all over the place. Dude, I saw Joe Rogan did an interview with that guy. No shit? The real guy? Yeah. The guy that was abducted. The true story

was based on. He goes to those science fiction conventions. I want to go to one just to hear his story. Right. Yeah, he'd go on his website and he's always has his appearances. Yeah, I mean, I want to believe him.

I believe him. I don't think that he's, you know, I don't think he has a ton of proof behind him except that they all took lie detector test and shit. And they're all adds up. So I'm not totally convinced of that guy, but I want to believe him. Didn't he say he got probed or something?

Doesn't everyone say that, though? I got probed last. week. She is about being probed right now with his scene song. I think that's a different type of probing. I know that fell asleep and woke up in another room. What? What the hell?

The alien was disguised as my neighbor Earl. I kind of enjoyed it, but I kind of felt guilty after. The doctor said he'd love it. of me. I always think of this. If I was ever in a situation

where people are chasing me, there's all kinds of weapons around you to grab and start throwing and swinging. At least you're something, right? Nummins, yeah. Yeah, sorry. I was looking for it. I kept pulling up the guy that got ran over

by the truck in the first one because I put dummy. Dummy. What's the name, Brian? Nubbins. That's amazing. I mean, that thing's got to stink too. I mean, that's skin on a skull.

I'd be throwing everything I could at them. Yeah, but this is a horror movie, man. I need to make one. It should work with Micah on it, man. You have made a horror movie, dude. He's got too much stuff on this plate. Too many movies. What does Mike have coming up right now?

He just talked about it. I don't even remember the names of them. I don't know. He's got that 911 one, right? Oh, first call or something like that. Yeah, I filmed something for that already. But that was just for the teaser. Yeah, I was what I already saw like either.

It wasn't a full trailer for it. it was like a 30 second something like that that was in my house yeah okay that was in here no shit yeah

that's not the final product everyone it's nubbins I know we're supposed to be talking about this movie did you already say the Saul's family

right here right here sex or the Saul Oh, man. That's an amazing line. Right? Yeah. Wow.

I like that chance on the next one, because it says it on the blade. Yes, that's right. That's the one with the teeth. Go ahead, man. No, that's the one with McConae, right? Yeah, no. The third one,

was just leather face with what's his name? Ken Forre. Yeah. It has a... Vigo Mortensen's in it. It has a teaser trailer where the chainsaw is coming up to water

like Excalibur. Oh, and that that got the leather face and that's awful and amazing at the same time. That leather, leather face was Kane Haugher. No shit?

Really? He did the trailer. He wasn't leather face in the movie, only in the trailer. Oh, wow. He played Jason. He played Jason. He played Freddy in the leather face. Freddy, he played Freddy at the end of that stupid ass. Jason goes to hell at the end. That was his hand that came up.

Oh, they grabbed the mask or whatever. Fuck that movie. And if you're yelling at me, I don't care. Fuck that movie. I liked it. Trash. Ness, I've never know what to think about you. man.

Did nothing for the series. Which was a masterpiece, but you didn't like that. Okay. I've always loved all the art that they made, especially in the first one. Little things in the little bone table and chairs.

The set design on this is fucking phenomenal. This is just, it's amazing set pieces right here. It goes the chili trophy. Yeah, I know. It's crazy, dude.

They tie everything back together. Is that Will Rogers on the missile? Yeah. Wow. Oh, yeah, I forgot Grandpa was in this. Oh, yeah, they got to pull Grandpa out. He should have been dead 10 years ago. Come on, man.

Grandpa lives forever. He's like the Saw his family, right? He got younger because he was like, he was he was hello. He was hello. looking in the first one. Yeah, that is a good point. He might be eating better now. Oh, no, he was sucking blood in the first one.

I didn't like that part. That part was rugged. He's eating chili. I always thought it was weird. They did make up instead of just hiring an old guy. Seems like on a low budget movie. That would have been way cheap.

it's a canon picture I mean this this one had the budget well the ones later on but this one yeah Canon's not known for spending their budget wisely they spend it all cocaine

I was just listening to a podcast they were talking about that movie Cyborg oh yeah Van Dam got more than half the budget just for his pay believe it and well terrible.

Oh, we're going to review it. Oh. I don't even remember that one. Oh, I remember it. Yeah. It is god-awful. Yeah. And that was a huge Van Damme fan.

He fights Warchild from Point Break. That's right. He does, huh? Yeah, War Child is just walking around. It's, ah. Poor child. She has been put through so much, right? Who said that earlier?

Yeah, I mean, look And I like to No, there's a rat in that bowl Must ate all the chili Are you serious? There's a rat in there Yeah Oh

He ate all the chili He shit Shit is ass tonight You know, I think She's a She's an underrated final girl No shit I don't think she really gets talked about it, no

No We didn't even talk about it. her in our final girl March Madness? Or did we? I think she might have went out early. You know what? She did come up. She did come up.

But you're right. It went out way too soon. She is good because she was pretty scrappy up until now and she's fucking losing her mind. Totally losing her mind. Which makes sense. This is one of the nurses in Halloween 2. I was listening. me too. I was listening to the Friday Nightmares podcast and Heather was talking about this and she said the third act lost her.

What the fuck is she talking about? The third act makes the movie, right? Yeah. Well, yeah. It goes totally bat shit insane. Isn't that the point though? Yeah. Well, that's the fun of this movie. Oh, they got Tabastia. make the other face good right why would resisting the urge to make joke why wouldn't they just use it

a whole person that is an excellent point I'm sure they could have stuck somebody in there that would have played that part perfectly what if this is an old man on a macabries it could be

It could be, Brian. It could be like an 80-year-old dude under him. Like, I have no clue what's going on. That's why it's younger. I'm surprised they didn't make a prequel with grandpa. We made a prequel with Leatherface, remember? That was terrible. I know we interviewed the writer.

I felt so guilty saying that it sucked. I know. But it wasn't as bad of a faux pa as you, Philip. Oh, yeah. Brian, you want to... Somebody's doing that with Sean. We had a guest. Phil didn't know he was in our message feed,

and he made some comments about his movie. Oh, my God. Seriously? Yeah, and then I was like, I was like, man, how do I tell this guy that this movie is fucking awful? then he realized he made the movie then he was like oh I really hated it wasn't the movie it was the guy that was in the movie and he was like well that that was me too leather face he made that one he was like hey well what did you think about the guy with the blue hair in this scene and I was like oh well he's part of the fucking problem

what movie was this? We got what we were talking to. Oh, Jesus. Jesus. Hey, this is the best policy, Sean. Lance. That's true.

Lance, he has contacted me to come back on. So slow your roll. I didn't say anything, Mr. I don't even know what to talk at all. Yeah, I'd rather be dead. if I was this old and still going and don't know what's happening.

Oh, God, yeah. He totally looks like he doesn't know what's happening. Yeah, just put a pillow over me or push me on traffic or something. I don't know what's happening, man. Just pull the plug. What is he singing?

Is that like an old Irish song or something? I don't know. I thought it was a Texas song. Right. Oh, hell no. That was a hell of a jump.

Yeah. Three chains off. Yeah. Just it off and just have a superhero jump. I try to make Dennis Hopper the next action star. Okay. You're cool of the week. My bad.

I said Dustin Hoffman. You know what I mean. Brian. Oh, Loki, you're cool of the week? I haven't seen it. I see it. It's fucking amazing. I didn't watch it yet.

I love what they're doing. Yeah. With what? Loki. Yes, me too, man. It looks good. That was going to be my cool of week, too, for sure. Yeah, not going to spoil it, but you open that multiverse up.

Yeah, I love it. Let's make a deal. Let's make a deal. That's back, too. my son had me watching a zombie movie with the kids oh yeah makes you not want to have chicken nuggets

right or at least don't eat the green one I guess he had heard about it and wanted me to watch it with him it was a lot of fun movie she'd be knocked out still he had that big

gas in the back of the head not cool week because I ran out of AJ's allergy medication that she gave me It is the season. Oh, wow. Yes. Not a good way to go.

Ouch. Out! Run, sister, run. Just kill me right there with your asshole. It's cutting with a chainsaw. Yeah. Oh, I think... It was a chainsaw, right?

See, I mean, Bubba could have took him out easy because his chainsaw was like way longer than Dennis Hoppers. That's what she said. Yeah. I like that they gave grandpa a hammer like he was going to defend himself. He tries. See, man, this movie could have been over with guns. Yeah. Yeah, like five minutes.

If I can walk around, I can't walk around with guns here. but if I can walk around with guns like down there, shit. Like the Indiana Jones scene where the guy with a sword. Yeah. There's a whole gun store too. Yeah. Yeah, right under the radio station. Oh, in the balls.

I'm boss hurt with those boots. I wouldn't want to get kicked in the balls with those boots. Have you guys over? No. Hell no. Not with boots. Have you ever kicked anyone with those boots on? take the head of yes

this is so awesome I mean I was shocked that Dennis Hopper was in this yeah is that big red yep I'm in there's crazy straw

kind of It's kind of terrifying in this movie silly way, but still he looks more spooky once he gets into the sunlight because then you can see the color of his eyes you're right Lance I put a lot of work into the set design

They did. I mean, this is amazing. It's canon. They got all the money. Oh, gut shot. And then all the little details, right? Like all the dust falling down and the smoke and the, I mean, it's just amazing. This did this just lay underrated?

It really is. Yeah. Again, this is far and away my favorite of all the Texas Chainshell Masking movies. There's so many people that hate it. What's the hate? I know. I don't. I get it. I've heard lots of friends

that are like, oh, that one sucks. I don't, fuck you. It's just silly. I mean, I get it. They don't, the campiness. They didn't, you know, didn't appreciate it. But, man, this one is a lot of fun. It doesn't take itself as seriously as like,

yeah. Philip, I said it. I don't have you heard me. Mandy owes a lot to this movie. Oh, I'm sure. Specifically, am I right? Yeah. Yes, baby.

that chainsaw blade is way too long when it's stuck in the bubble oh he pulls out the old fuck you charlie hooking and crooked just hold that under your head so you don't feel anything there you go adrenaline should be pumping just that ain't the only thing pumping there's that boot then boot them to the head right here oh there you go that's awesome

fry his ass I pissed and came in the same time oh remember earlier she was talking about the exit sign right when he was in there torturing her and she said go toward that sign

E-X-I-T. And there it is. An amazing callback. Yeah, absolutely. I just caught that for the first time, I think. Yeah, yeah. Got him in the bag of the chainsaw. Fuck it.

This movie's a fucking masterpiece, guys. Fucking grandpa. Yeah. When it's daylight outside. Did they go down when it was, it was night? It was dark when they got there.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like... She got knocked out at some point before she got tied to the dinner table. It's like two or three o'clock in the afternoon, though. Oh, this is when he's getting there with a straight razor. No thing.

Oh, my God. Oh, he's going to chew off his fucking ear. Get that out of here. Fuck him up. Tyson. That's not her with that fake week. Like, I would not want to feel this. getting cut from

I hate paper cuts I can't imagine getting hit with a straight razor in the back of her legs too those defensives are not impregnable she should have just been booting him there you go that's the top of the matter horn

guys is it I look this this looks pretty sweet right here like the matter Horn Mountain. And when you went inside it was caves. It is creepy as fuck.

It looks like one of, it looks like one of the the Morlocks and the time machine. Sean, you picked a good one, man. Thank you. This was one of my favorites, but now this may be in my top 10 of all time. Yeah, I love it. I'm not

exaggerating right now. and what a franchise Texas chainsaw massacre what a fucking long living franchise right yeah I think they're trying to reboot it they need to do the grandpa prequel right might as well reboots do they got of this fucking movie one

two three four four what are these fucking skulls for wings eight eight movies and what was this for Oh, hell no. Oh, my God. Slice in his fucking throat. Heather, and you call yourself a horror movie fan,

and the third act lost you. Come on. No, I completely disagree. The third part's the, like, we're going to get amazing. How the hell they haul her up those little bitty stairs? She looks heavy, too. Grandma.

Even got dried up bitties. Oh, my God. I'd like to know. It's insane. What Grandpa and Grandma did to everyone to make them all crazy. Yeah. Yeah, that's a good point. We got to see that movie.

I wonder. Ow. You guys think, Mike? Oh, fuck. They were cousin fuckers. packing away at her back. Luckily there's gas in there. Oh, gut shot.

Wow. Good stunt man right here. Yep. Oh. God damn. That looks painful as shit. I like this shot. Where's the flag?

She's straight up. It's doing it, man. I love it. The final girl ever, right? Oh, yes. I mean, she's the only one to survive this whole thing. Everyone's dead. All right.

Well, that's it. Texas Chants on Massacre, too. Yes, it is. So that's totally worth the watch, man. I had a lot of fun with that one. I had a blast. Thank you guys. I haven't seen this in a while.

so yeah, thank you for picking this. Sean, why did you, why did you pick the movie, man? I got turned on to it through the Horror News Radio podcast. And I had never seen it before listening to them, and I saw it, I fell in love with it, and I was like, and it had been a few years back that I had heard the episode.

And so I was like, I want to revisit. So I was like, this is a great one for commentary. well we we owe a lot to horror news radio don't we brain oh yeah Doc Rockoo Rest in peace black saint Oh yeah oh my god that broke my heart Oh yeah All right the budget for this one was 4.5 million in a boxed office

In the United States 8 million so Not bad And an extra four They are For a canon film The fact that it actually made me money.

They are rebooting it. And it looks like Fetta Alvarez is James won and this one up. Not directing, producing. They're rebooting this one?

No, the franchise. Okay. I would have been a lot okay with it if he was directing. Yeah. He did the, he did Don't Breathe and the Evil Dead

remake. Which was awesome. Yeah, that was really good. Yeah, I'm saying it continued it continued with that. Yeah. All right. We'll see how this new Evil Dead comes out. Did you get this cream factory one, Brian? No.

I know, I missed it. Yeah, I'm not paying those prices for it now. Hell no. I do love the poster, the Breakfast Club knockoff. I thought that was cool. After a decade of silence, the buzz is back. I did get the event horizon Blu-ray from a shout factory

Yeah I picked that one up too Is it still out or is it out of print? You can still get it Yeah, it just came out like two months ago Okay I think yeah Last one I got was King Kong The 76 one

Yeah, real king of red shiner beer Both both Sponsors for this one Of course What a size of it in there All right. Well, Sean, thanks for coming on, man. I got to get back to the party. Thank you guys. I appreciate it. And you everyone have a great night. Thank you for your support, man.

Yeah. Take it easy. We got to do the outro, Sean. Okay. And we got to do our sneak preview of what's next week. So as always, we want to thank you guys for listening to another episode of the horror returns. We would love to hear your feedback and ideas. You can reach us at the Horror Returns at gmail.com. You know where to follow us. One day, somehow

Philip and I are going to make the website work, and we'll have a whorereturns.com literally. Next week, Brian, what the fuck? You changed the schedule on us, dude? Yeah, I don't know why. I had put this one next month.

It was accident. We're doing a commentary on the stepfather for Father's Day. remake or original fuck the remake is anybody joining us or is it just the regular anybody can join us if they want to

you want to come back strong oh yeah hell yeah if it's cool I'll absolutely join oh yeah definitely all right sounds like it's a done deal right done deal

that's great all right philip until the horror returns again Good