The Horror Returns - THR - Ep. #484: The Toxic Avenger (1984) & The Toxic Avenger (2025)

Episode Date: September 5, 2025

We get toxic this week. Pedro is in the house. Cool of the week includes Ick, The Home, Gangs of London, and She Rides Shotgun. Trailers are V/H/S/Halloween and 28 Years Later: The Bone Temple. The po...dcast spotlight shines on TUNED TO DECAY. And we get feedback from Matt Wood, Nureldin Maslu, Gary "The Goyne" Murphy, Michel Prazeres, and Mike J Marin. A VERY SPECIAL THANK YOU TO STEVEN LOWBLAD WHO UPPED HIS PATREON LEVEL TO $10.00. Thanks for listening! The Horror Returns Website: https://thehorrorreturns.com THR Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thehorrorreturns/ Join THR Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1056143707851246 THR X: https://twitter.com/horror_returns?s=21&t=XKcrrOBZ7mzjwJY0ZJWrGA THR Instagram: https://instagram.com/thehorrorreturns?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= THR Threads: https://www.threads.net/@thehorrorreturns?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ== THR YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/@thehorrorreturnspodcast3277 THR Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/thehorrorreturns THR TeePublic: https://www.teepublic.com/user/the-horror-returns SK8ER Nez Podcast Network: https://www.podbean.com/pu/pbblog-p3n57-c4166 E Society Spotify For Podcasters: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/esoc Music By: Steve Carleton Of The Geekz

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:09 Regings victims, for those of you who delight and dread, who fantasize about fear, who glorify gore, welcome. You have found the place where the horror returns. Listeners beware. This podcast contains major plot spoilers. and the foulest of language. Join us in celebrating the old and the new, the best, and the worst in horror. Welcome back, everybody, to the horror returns.
Starting point is 00:01:01 Glad to not see your shining faces this week, because we probably won't be on YouTube, because Phil usually does that. He's out this week, but I'm last. We got Brian and our other co-hosts in the House, Petra, What's up, man? What's up? Tagging in for Phil today.
Starting point is 00:01:18 Yeah, we'll go with that narrative. So I'm tagging in for Phil today. What's going on in Alaska? Rainin. What's raining? We're having that here. We're having that here. Is it that nasty, acid rain of lands?
Starting point is 00:01:35 No, I don't think so. I hope not. If it is, I may not be here next week. What I mean, you know, when it's summertime and it rains, it's that hot, nasty rain, you know? yeah no it feels good man it's um it's actually a big relief because it gets really fucking hot here during the summer in florida but you know as long as long as we get some cool rain it cools the uh pool down too we get the swimming pool oh okay if there's uh yeah if there's fresh rain in it
Starting point is 00:02:02 the temperature goes down at least five degrees it's not not alaska be careful with that swimming pool because one of your favorite movies of all time uh has a killer swimming point so be careful with that pool. Brian thought it, but you said it. I saw the look on Brian's face. Yeah. All right. You guys ready to jump into Cool of the Week?
Starting point is 00:02:27 Yeah. I'll go last. I've got a list again. All right. Okay. So I saw a movie called Iick last night. It. Yeah, it's a horror comedy.
Starting point is 00:02:41 It was in the, it had like a one week run in theater. and I was trying to go out there and see in the theater because as an AMCA A lister, you know, Lance, from back in the day, we tried to catch everything. Trying to get our money's worth on that thing, especially because it just went up. Like, everything else in the world. Did it? Here in L.A. is $27 a month now, Lance. I think it's the same here. Yeah, I can't.
Starting point is 00:03:04 That's too rich for my blood now. I've got a $5 movie theater here. I just go there. So in order to justify it, I have to watch three movies a month at $10 a pop. At least, yeah. know. So if I want, you know, so anyways, these are the kind of movies that you try to fit in this like, you know, like lower budget, kind of like one week run kind of movies. So Iick was one that I missed, but I watched last night because it's on streaming now. And I had a good time with it. It was it was very formulaic, very basic. It stars, uh, uh, Brandon Routh or Ruth, you know, old Superman himself. Oh, yeah. Um, sure. That guy popped. pops up from time to time and I always wonder, man, what happened with that guy's career? Because he was like the it guy for like the mid-2000s.
Starting point is 00:03:50 And then he just never really made it. You know, he just kind of stuck on video on demand land. Like a lot of these guys are. He did that movie after Superman. That's what happened. What was it, Dillon Dog? Oh, yeah, he did Dillon Dog. I remember Dillon.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Career killer. He was also in that one movie that, uh, uh, what's his name? Uh, never mind. I'm, I just got out of work, so I'm pretty tired. Anyways, and it also starts Minos Tavari, who I have, I still have a huge crush on because she, she was hot from back in the day. Sure. And so pretty much this movie is, you know, it's a small town movie. The movies takes place in a small town.
Starting point is 00:04:31 This guy kind of peaked early in life. He peaked in high school, big football star in high school, and he met this girl. And then they don't really tell you if he had a. kid with this growing up, but somehow like years past. And there's this thing called the ick. It's some sort of like alien kind of like the blob, but everybody just accepts it. Everybody just accept that it's part of their life. Like they don't trip on it. And eventually it starts to take over the town. And it's one of, it's the old trope of like only one guy knows what's going on and everybody else is kind of like ignorant to what's happening. So he's trying to tell everyone
Starting point is 00:05:07 and everybody ignores them until it's too late. And that's where it gets really good. Once it gets to that part is like, you know, Brandon Ruth is trying to warn everybody. He's like a scientist, so he knows how to stop this thing. Nobody believes him. This ick thing turns people into, like, zombies and stuff. And at the end, it comes down to, like, him and his daughter, and they try to destroy this alien thing. And it's, it was a fun time, you know, fun, innocent time.
Starting point is 00:05:33 You know, I'll never watch it again, but it was a good little movie. So that's ick. So people want to check it out. Go ahead and check it out. It's streaming now. so I'm sure people could find it if they try hard enough. Okay. Then I watched a movie that surprised me.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Brian reviewed it the other day of The Home. Now. Pete Davidson. Yes, Pete, our boy Pete Davidson, right? The overachiever Pete Davidson, as I call him. And this movie was, I remember Brian had posted something where he was watching it. And I asked him if it was good or not. And Brian, you know sold me, by the way.
Starting point is 00:06:09 but that's okay because we get busy. And so I never got an answer, but I gave it a chance because you gave it a glowing review like a week later on the show. And man, you were right. This movie, it starts off. I was hating it in the beginning because I think, Brian, correct me if I'm wrong, maybe I miss something. Are we supposed to believe that Pete Davidson is playing an underage, like, teenager? Because he's still kind of like trying to get along with his, like, father. foster parents and he's got like a foster family.
Starting point is 00:06:43 But this guy's like 30 years old. Like you could see. But but but they treat him like he's a, he's a teenager and the script never really clears it up. Um, because I think, I think when he gets in trouble with the law, they give him an option to go and take care of this old folks home,
Starting point is 00:06:58 right? Okay. That's the setup then. Yeah. Yeah, I think they also call his parents or his foster parents. That answers it. Even,
Starting point is 00:07:08 even, Even the little thing they gave them. It's like juvenile detention thing. You know, it's like, go do this and we'll do that for you. You're not a big deal. But it's a 30-year-old man. But yeah, they're training them like as a kid. So anyways.
Starting point is 00:07:22 So this is all like by the number stuff, right? And then it starts getting very like, like, it goes off the rails in a good way in the third act. Like the third act needs to be seen to be believed. Okay. And it really saves the movie for me. me. I had a really good time with this movie once it really picked up. It's a slow burn in the beginning, but then once you really know what's happening, which is out of left field and it's like a mind fuck, then it really picks up and it gets really good. So I thought this movie was pretty damn good,
Starting point is 00:07:54 and people should watch it, the home. The Pete Davidson, which is so against type too, which is weird, because there's no comedy. He's playing the straight the whole time. So he's straight start to finish, huh? Yeah, he's like anywhere from like 16 to 20. We don't know because they never say. I mean, but. And so, and so yeah, the third act is really fun. Lots of stuff going on and it's worth the ride. So that's nice. So I saw two good movies today, Ig and the Home. So people could check them out. They're both streaming now. All right. That's what I got. Phil. Phil's not here. So Brian, is it? I think we can count both of those. What do you think? Give Pedro the two for? Yeah, I found the home out there, Brian. Brian, I appreciate that one link you sent me through Messenger. You know, the one where we can rent the movies? Oh, yeah. And the home was on there, and it's a good copy.
Starting point is 00:08:51 So I'm going to definitely check that out. So is that it? Pedro, nothing else. That's what I got. Runners up? Okay. Short and sweet. I'm burning up here in L.A., man.
Starting point is 00:09:02 It's been in the high 90s for the whole week. So it's, for L.A. is hot. I might sound like a little bitch to people that live in, you know, the Southwest or whatever, but for L.A. is pretty fucking hot. All right. Well, stay inside if you can, you know. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I checked at, Brian, I checked at that movie you talked about last week.
Starting point is 00:09:24 Eanie Meen. Mm-hmm. It was a, it was a fun ride. It was definitely action-packed. A lot of goofy antics. It's more of a comedy than I thought it was going to be. man, that ending was dark. That kind of came out.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Yeah, I watched it too, by the way. I watched it. And that ending, I'm not a big of fan of it as Brian was last week. Because it's just not my style of movie. I don't like those silly movies where, like, it's obvious that nothing's supposed to be taken seriously. You know, like, like the guy is joking around the whole time. And they're talking about pregnancy as a throwaway conversation, you know. But much like the home.
Starting point is 00:10:05 shit, once the third act hits, or even, not so much the third act, but just that last final, what, like the last 10 minutes, man, it takes a turn. And go ahead, take it over from there, Lance. Yeah, yeah, it does, man. I didn't see that one coming. So I enjoyed it. You know, I'd, you know, probably give it, you know, a seven, good solid seven is a fun ride. Lots of characters coming out and double crossings going on and you can't tell who's on whose side. So it's a fun movie. I'm reading a book. the end of the world as we know it. Have you guys heard of this one? Short Story collection.
Starting point is 00:10:41 No, the song. All right, I think it's kind of based on the, they based the title on the song. They had to have, right? I don't know if REM is going to get any money from that. But I'm sure Stephen King is getting some money because it's an 800-page book of short stories that are set in the universe of the stand.
Starting point is 00:11:01 So it's all... Oh, so it's his book. Yeah, it's like... Oh, shit. Yeah, there's four stories. segments, right? So the first segment deals with stories that are, you know, when the virus is first kicking in, and
Starting point is 00:11:11 some people are starting to get sick. All Captain Trips, huh? Captain Trips, yes, sir. And then the second section is, you know, once, you know, they're kind of like on the road trying to get to either Vegas or Colorado, so
Starting point is 00:11:27 there's some stories there. Then you get the third one. That's the one I'm in right now, which is a section of after the big events and the stand? Like, where did people end up in other parts of the world? And then I haven't gotten to the fourth section yet. I don't know what that can possibly
Starting point is 00:11:43 be at this point. But it's a good read, man. It's a page turner. It's like tales of the Walking Dead. Did you ever watch that show? Yeah, but this beats that. There's only been like two stories that got kind of boring
Starting point is 00:11:59 for me, but they're all 30 minutes or less. So, it's not too bad. It's not a bad read. I'm glad I'm glad I picked it up. Dexter continues to be awesome. Just watch the Penn Ultimate episode. I don't know where the fuck they're going to go from here. Because there's so much shit going on that characters that you know and you've loved for years and years,
Starting point is 00:12:21 if you watch Dexter may or may not make it. And it's a good watch. And Peter Dinklage, he definitely fits right into the timeline for sure, Brian. Yeah, well, we're talking about him today. Yeah, a little for a short while. Yeah, it's awesome. All right, but I'm going to give my cool of the week. I've already brought this one up when I was watching season one,
Starting point is 00:12:43 but I started season two of Gangs of London. Holy fucking shit. This season's going to be, I think it's poised to be a lot better than the first. Like, every episode until like second or last from the end, Brian, wouldn't you agree, had a big action sequence in it with a lot of stunts? Oh, yeah, definitely. A lot of gore, a lot of uncontrolled killing. And then it slowed down a little.
Starting point is 00:13:11 And it kind of ended on a cliffhanger. And this one sort of picks up one year later. And when I say you don't know who's going to die in a TV show, they're pretty serious about it, man. They've got people they're setting up to be main characters that they're not afraid to kill off. And I just don't see that too often. So it's what the walking head should have done.
Starting point is 00:13:32 I don't know. I was going to say, I don't know, man. I disagree with you, Lance. I think that's being used as a crutch nowadays. Is it? Like the whole Game of Thrones, like Sean Bean's stunt. Yeah, to an extent. And I mean, in the walking that we start all the time, I mean, everybody dies in that show except for like...
Starting point is 00:13:49 No, toward the end, all those motherfuckers were still alive. And they were already announcing the shows like with three seasons to go. So it's like, where's the suspense? We fucking know Daryl's going to live. We know Carol's going to live, you know? Yeah, that's true. But not all of them, though. called a little bullshit. Okay. All right. And then obviously, obviously we just had the last of us, you know, Pedro Paso. Don't tell me. Don't tell me. I haven't, I'm not called up.
Starting point is 00:14:15 You don't know that one. Well, I know how the game goes. So, but from what I understand. The whole point is that they do do it a lot. But you're, but I mean, it does. If it helps the story, it's fine, you know. And I think I'm going to check this show out because you've, you've kind of pimped it out over the last couple of weeks. And I'm always looking for recommendation. So I'm going to check. it out. Yeah, it's a lot of, it's a lot of action. If you like John Wick, I think you'll enjoy it. Yeah, it's from the raid, right? Yeah, I love the raid. I think he's a Welsh director. Yeah, and he did, he's the showrunner, but he's directed several episodes. So it's, it's, it's a winner, man. That's my cool of the week. Gangs of London, season two, episode one. And is that like an episodic show, or do they drop them all at once, or how does that work? Like, it's a week-to-week thing? Right now, one in two are on a mc plus and they've already aired but yes it it is a week to week deal
Starting point is 00:15:11 but uh only you can you have to move to the UK if you want to see season three I'm sure maybe Brian could turn me on to some alternative ways but you know AMC AMC plus has one and two mm okay so they show this show already air they just picked it up and they're releasing it in America exactly yeah okay now it makes all right uh for my list i'm going to start from the bottom work my way up uh-oh okay first movie pop-eye's revenge it's everything you think it is right it's essentially a friday the 13th movie you got good-looking people that go to a cabin not to as counselors but to fix up because of the legend of pop-eye
Starting point is 00:16:01 And they give a whole backstory, which they don't really explain why he has freakishly strong arms. Spinets, right? I don't even think they even explain why he wears a sailor outfit. They rush this one out. Maybe he lived an alternative lifestyle when he was a regular person. You never know. He was one of the village people. So, Brian, in my prime, my prime account, I don't know if this happened with you or anybody else that has prime
Starting point is 00:16:31 or is my algorithm. They actually set it up to where I get all the, like, public domain movies. Yeah. So they just got the rights for all of them at once, and they just threw them out there. And I got kind of excited because I'm behind. And I know the piglet one, is that part of the Pooniverse? I think it's the same studio, but I don't think it's part of the universe. Okay, because they're all there.
Starting point is 00:16:56 And I started with the other Popeye knockoff called Shivers Me Timbers. Oh, God. They got another one on Prime called Popeye the Slayer Man. I thought that was the way. Is that the one you saw, Brian? No, mine was Popeye's revenge. Oh, fuck. So there's three of them.
Starting point is 00:17:14 Jeez. Yeah. Yeah. And shivers me timbers is he gets electrocuted like Jason did in part six. And that's how he becomes this big Popeye kind of guy. He's like an old man in the beginning, like a real old man. He's cranky. And he's all scrawny, kind of like the toxic avenger in a lot of ways.
Starting point is 00:17:31 and then he gets hit with lightning and then off he goes in a killing spreek. So that shivers me timbers. Kind of like Captain America if he were a killer, huh? There you go. Kind of sounded more entertaining Popeye's revenge. Uh-oh. Where is that one, Brian, in case we want to watch it? I think 2B is neither a 2B or prime.
Starting point is 00:17:53 Probably. Okay. All right. They're just about the same these days. Prime's gone downhill and 2B's gone way uphill, I think. Yeah. Next one, I checked out the new Red Sonia movie. I saw that.
Starting point is 00:18:07 Disappointed, just like I said. Yeah, that's what I hear. Yeah, that's what I hear. It is so CGI heavy. Like, I'm watching a movie and she's sitting in a tree. And I'm like, you guys couldn't go find a tree for her to sit in? They CGI had a tree? God damn.
Starting point is 00:18:25 That's rough. And there was moments in there where I was like, okay, she, it's, Matilda Lutz, who was in that revenge movie. Okay. There was times I was like, okay, she works as Red Sonia, but they're just not giving her shit to do in the movie. And it was kind of moving along fast. And it just, the CGI just bothers you.
Starting point is 00:18:50 There's like a cyclops. They fight, and it looks like a fucking bad video game. Duke Nuke him or something, huh? Yeah. Castle Orfenstein. I can't recommend this one. I'm going to watch it anyway. They should have gotten Jason Momoa to do the cameo as Conan the Barbarian.
Starting point is 00:19:08 They should have. Since he was the knockoff Arnold in his movie. Or Arnold. Arnold could have shown that, right? You don't get Jason Mamoa. You get Michael Bisbing, former UFC middleweight. Oh, wow. Man.
Starting point is 00:19:23 You like that one, not, Pedro? That's like the fourth string Arnold, right? No, like the 10th string Arnold. And I move up to a couple good movies. I cut my list in half. I'll talk about address next week because we got a lot of news to talk about them. I checked out this kind of neo-western horror movie called Forgive Us All. And it stars the, I think her name is Lily Sullivan.
Starting point is 00:19:51 She was in, she was the final girl in Evil Dead Rise. Oh, okay. Yeah, pretty good. like new way Western mixed with a zombie virus outbreak where she plays a mother who's lost her family
Starting point is 00:20:11 and is all alone with her father and then this guy comes across their land he's carrying a vaccine but he's being hunted by the government which I will say that's a negative part of the movie they don't really go into why they're trying to kill this guy if he has the vaccine
Starting point is 00:20:29 Yeah, because he's got a billion dollar thing on him. He's got the vaccine and is the government. That makes sense to me. This sounds great. This sounds awesome, man. Some of the movie gave me vibes of Stakeland. Okay. Because the zombies, they call them shriekers in this one.
Starting point is 00:20:49 They usually come out at night. This is nuts, man. So this is like post-apocalyptic, like Western. Yeah, it's not back in the day. I thought it was like, why was the government, like in the old West and shit? Wells Fargo coming after, huh? I'm like, that doesn't really, but now that you explain it, okay, so it's post-apocalyptic, okay. Yeah, so that one was a pretty good watch, but my cool of the week will go to a new movie.
Starting point is 00:21:19 It's a crime thriller starring Taryn Edgerton from the Kingsman. Sure. Called She Ride Shotgun. Oh, I have this run to do that. I have this one on the pocket. I really thought the performances in this one were outstanding because it's about this girl. She's waiting on her mother to pick her up from school,
Starting point is 00:21:39 and her father shows up. And you can tell she don't really know her father that well, and you find out he just got out of prison. And he's picking her up because basically, without spoiling it, shit happened while he was in prison, and his family has a green light on him to be killed. Oh, boy. he takes his daughter on the run and then he's got people after him.
Starting point is 00:22:04 And I thought the little girl did a fantastic job throughout the movie. Terran Egerton is a great actor and I'm surprised he's not bigger than he is. You know, I think he's had a couple of like video on demand specials lately. I know he was in this movie about the history of Tetris that I saw about a year ago. Oh, yeah. On Apple. And then he was on, he was in that movie Carry On That. Netflix. Yeah, yeah, with Jason Bingman.
Starting point is 00:22:33 He was pretty good in that. He's a good actor. He's a really good actor. And I'm surprised, like, Marvel hasn't come after him to play one of these superheroes or something, you know, because I think he would be a good job. I think they will. I think they will. He needs to fire his agent. So, or, you know. But, but no, he's a great actor. And I'm looking forward to this one. This one is definitely on the docket for sure.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Yeah, he's playing a character that's nothing like Egsie from the Huntsy. or not the huntsman the kingsman right yeah so or a rocket man he was he's not like rocking man either right oh definitely let's just say he hung out with a group of people in prison that probably wouldn't be accepting of elton wouldn't like old alton john rockin man huh yeah in that dodger uniform so yeah that was a long time moment in history yeah cool the week has to go to she ride shotgun all right I am looking it up right now to add to the list. I think I have seen this poster. I wrote both of them down.
Starting point is 00:23:38 So it's one that I need to rent, right, Brian? Yeah. I got a rent for Give Us All and she writes shotgun. Actually, I read it. I read it. She writes shotgun. I didn't need to watch it. We're going to be spending a lot of money-rent movies this week, huh?
Starting point is 00:23:55 Well, I have credits. Thanks to... Okay. All right. On that note, Brian, you got any horror headlines? It sounds like you do. Yeah, a lot of news came out today. We'll start with the Young Frankenstein prequel titled Very Young Frankenstein. Kerry Ellways wins the cast and will play the president of the United States. That fits, right, Pedro?
Starting point is 00:24:24 Is this like, is Mount Brooks going to, at 105 years old, going to direct this movie? I don't know if it's going to be a series on FX Oh, okay, because I think you're going to be No No That history of the world History of the World Part 2
Starting point is 00:24:41 was fucking horrible Did you all see that? Yeah, but this is FX Which Yeah, okay Which arguably the best TV show is going on right now on FX Yeah, I get it
Starting point is 00:24:55 Hopefully they'll pull it off Because he is Because from what I understand, he is going to direct or did direct SpaceBoss 2, and he's legitimately 100 years old. Like he not, so by the time he gets around to this one, he's going to be 103 years old, which is insane. Still rocking. I don't know if he's directing, but I know he's heavily involved with the story.
Starting point is 00:25:21 Okay. All right. Well, I mean, he went on a run there. There was about, I would say, about five or six classics in a row. this guy, so he's got a lot of equity with me. You guys remember silent movie? Of course, man.
Starting point is 00:25:36 Yeah. Let's see. More TV news. The Cape Fear TV series that's produced by Martin Scorsese and Steven Spielberg adds Ron Perlman, Ted Levine, and Margarita
Starting point is 00:25:52 Levia, I think is her name. I know she was Daredevil's girlfriend and the New Daredevil series. Oh, okay. Yeah, all right, I know who you're talking about now. So she's probably an up-and-comer now, but that's a good cast. I like that.
Starting point is 00:26:08 Yeah, joins already cast Javier Bardem, Amy Adams, and Patrick Wilson. Sounds like a winner. Yeah, sounds like a winner. Amy Adams is all over the place now with that Starfighter gig she got and all this. So she's, you know, adding to her bank account. Good for her. Yeah. Not just Lois Lane, right?
Starting point is 00:26:28 that's right let's see the creep tape season two drops on shutter this fall so I would say probably October I really enjoyed the first season I thought I was worried that it was gonna be like him just kind of killing random
Starting point is 00:26:47 which it was don't get me wrong but they made it to where you you always learn something about him in every episode like it wasn't just this random like oh there's this other guy as a camera guy that I hire and I'm going to fuck with them for 20 minutes and I'm going to kill him. It wasn't just that. There was a lot of layers to the episodes.
Starting point is 00:27:07 I really liked the one with the mom. I thought that one was probably my favorite one where he's celebrating with his mom out in the woods. And they end up, you know, his mom's, I guess, boyfriend or something was coming to visit or meet the family. And I know how that ended up for the guy. Sure. And then there's one that's pretty awesome as far. Like if you're into like just like cinema and plays and acting, where remember he does the whole episode by himself,
Starting point is 00:27:34 where he's kind of like just, he's in the hotel by himself. And then literally the guy that comes in at the end, he gets like a one second shot and he just kills him and that's the end of the episode. That was another really good episode. So I like these because they're peeling, they're giving you a little bit about him as these episodes are moving forward.
Starting point is 00:27:52 So I'm looking forward to season two. Yeah, I only made it two episodes in. So I guess I'm up. I'll pick it up again at some point. Once I get through this list that I keep in my iPhone of all the TV shows that I'm either currently watching or need to watch, because you guys know how scatterbrain I can get, right? Oh, if you're going to add it to that list, it's going to be a while.
Starting point is 00:28:14 That list you showed me? Yeah. It's going to be a minute before you get to the creep tapes. Yeah, I think so. Let's see. It, Welcome to Derry, finally gets a premiere date, October, 26. You excited,
Starting point is 00:28:30 that one's gonna jump the line right last because that's a Stephen King show. I think so. I'm actually kind of excited. I was like, meh about this at first, but I'm kind of excited about it now. What do you think, Pedro?
Starting point is 00:28:41 No, I'm excited too. I'm with you. And man, this guy, every year, he just, so we got the running man remake, which I'm very excited for. Then we have the long walk,
Starting point is 00:28:53 and now we have this show. I mean, that's all just, Kachink. What? Caching to this guy, you know, it's just, you know, walking right into the bank. But good for him because, I mean, he's got a lot of great stuff to adapt.
Starting point is 00:29:05 And yeah, like you said, I'm looking forward to this one because we've never had like a prequel. Like we've never had, there's so much they could do with this, right? They could explain so much of the mythology of Penny Weiss and all that where he comes from. And so I'm looking forward to it for sure. Yeah, this is supposed to be, I think they plan it to be three seasons in each season. season takes place in different era when Penny Wise was around I think it's going to go
Starting point is 00:29:32 each season is going to go further back I like that yeah so that's cool though because it still allows you to tell one complete story every season you're not pigeonholed into stretching one full story out you could do one one like you said one era then another era than another era because some of these shows man is like they
Starting point is 00:29:50 they commit like remember when M-Lai Shamanalalongedang said that his He said, he said his show, what was it called? Servant. Servant was going to go six seasons. Right. I remember that. And in season one, we're like on this very show, we're like, there's no fucking
Starting point is 00:30:08 way he's going to stretch this out to six seasons. And sure enough, he got six fucking seasons out of that episode or that show. And then now one of the ones that's getting a lot of, like, negative feedback is yellow jackets because they wanted to go five seasons. And that show's moving out of us. nails pace, man. And I mean, I gave up, I gave up on it last season just because it wasn't going anywhere. But they said, they said, we're going to go five seasons. And I guess they're going to get to five seasons, but they have to just stretch all of it out. But welcome to Derry's not
Starting point is 00:30:38 going to fall into that trap because every season is going to be kind of a different story. Yeah, I agree. That's the right way to do it. Yeah, I tapped out of yellow jackets. It's like probably halfway through season two. It was just getting, yeah, snail's pace was a good description. Let's see. Sam Ramey is going to produce a remake of 1978 called Classic Magic.
Starting point is 00:31:07 Ah. The one that starred Anthony Hopkins. Yeah, I remember that one. Do we have any casting news yet? No, this was just announced today. Okay. Do we have any Wolf Creek 3 news? No, and
Starting point is 00:31:23 Lance will not be answering that guy because I don't believe that's a real guy. Well, I dedicated the same exact message on Instagram. I dedicated two sentences later on when we're in the feedback. All right. We'll give him a little bit, see how he answers and go from there. Is that fair enough? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:43 We may have other listeners that want to know about what. Technically, we have the show in part one and two, so technically there is three different. Well, there you go. All right. So random bot, you're now answered. All right, let's see. Luke Besson's romantic Dracula movie, Dracula Love Tale, has been a part of my vertical
Starting point is 00:32:06 and plans to get a theatrical release. You know what? I'm going to say something controversial, and I don't care because I am a horror fan and I have been for years, so I stand by that. I've never... Dracula is such a boring fucking character,
Starting point is 00:32:21 and it gets so many adaptations. It's unbelievable. Like, that is such a... worse than Spider-Man. Nothing happening character, and yet they just keep on spewing out different versions of the same character. And to me, it's like nobody has ever really hit it. Maybe Francis Ford Coppola a little bit. But other than that...
Starting point is 00:32:40 A little bit. Yeah. I would agree. Let's see what else we got. Sidney's upcoming thriller, The House Maid, has shifted release dates from Christmas Day to December 19. So it's moving up a week. Hopefully she won't Surrany controversy
Starting point is 00:32:58 with this one Unlike the jeans commercial Right I saw her in that movie Americana It was produced This is a good movie I recommend
Starting point is 00:33:06 Oh yeah See I've been Maybe To watch that one too Yeah You You heard of this I guess it's a book
Starting point is 00:33:13 The House Made Lance Never heard I don't think I've heard of it Um Yeah Not familiar Is it a thriller
Starting point is 00:33:22 Yeah Like a Whodanet type thing I think so. I don't know. I like her. I mean, you know, she was really, what was that movie two years ago? Or last year, where she played The Nun?
Starting point is 00:33:34 Immaculate. Yeah, that was a good one. Yeah. And she, I think she had a lot of creative input in that, from what I hear. Yeah, she produced it with her then fiancé or whatever. So that she's like a car carrying member of the horror crowd. So that's good. There you go.
Starting point is 00:33:52 Let's see. Violin 9-2. We got Kristen Bell, and I'm going to butcher her last name, Danielle Melchfor. She was a rap catcher in the suicide squad. Ah, okay. Somehow Ben Diesel's cousin and Fast and Furious. Right. Everybody's family.
Starting point is 00:34:19 Even the ones that kill off members of the Fast and Furious become family, right? All is forgiven when it's family. We're still waiting for Fast X part two. When is that coming out? I don't know. Is the Rock even going to be a part of that series? You heard he said he's not doing blockbusters no more? That's right.
Starting point is 00:34:43 Do serious roles? Good for him. They screened his new movie, The Smashing Machine, and I guess it got a 15-minute round of applause. And he dropped about 100 pounds. You know, he just kind of... He looks sickly, actually. He looks like Matthew McConaughey did in the Dollar's Bires.
Starting point is 00:35:01 Oh, no. Or like Christian Bale and the machinist. No, he's not that. Yeah, I respect it because he said he doesn't want to be typecast as an action star, but I agree with Pedro. He does look like he's sick. But I guess it was for the smashing machine. I guess that's what his character looks like by the end of the movie.
Starting point is 00:35:24 but he's still that that was like months ago but i don't i don't know i have i have a like i also feel like he was already getting pushed out of the of the action genre i he had a couple he had a couple flops under his belt um i know there was that whole controversy where he tried to like muscle his way into dc and they told him to fuck off um so there he he's trying to kind of recreate himself right now because he's had a lot of like negative press thrown at him and then the whole thing that he did with wwee which rest of Slim fans are still upset up him about. So I think this is more like course correcting than something he really wanted to do.
Starting point is 00:36:03 Because if like, let's say Black Adam had done a billion dollars, right? There's no way he would have all of a sudden want to do serious films. He's only doing serious films. Yeah, great point. Because it seems like he's running out of gas with that genre that he was the head of for so many years. So we'll see what happens. But it's going to be hard because, I mean, he's got to really step up his acting skills. you know if he wants to do like great drama pieces and stuff but supposedly the smashing machine got like a 60 minute stand in ovation and he's crying and so it was kind of a big deal we'll see it opens a month from today actually october 2nd i think it's october 2nd
Starting point is 00:36:40 oscar season yeah yeah yeah around there let's see um osgood perkins already announced his next film it will be called the young people Hmm. I don't know. He's hit a miss. He's hit him with the monkey. Yeah, yeah. He was doing good for a while. He hit the monkey and it's like, oh, God, what happened, man? I'm with Pedro on that one. Brian, I think y'all like the monkey more than I did, right? You and Philip? Yeah, I liked it. This is not my favorite out of his, but I liked it because it was something that that was different from the other movies he's done. Sure. Yeah. Yeah, maybe he thought the same thing. Like, you know, I'm always so serious. Let me do something that's just so absurd, you know, and I'm going to have a good time. with it. And then he's got another movie coming out in the next
Starting point is 00:37:31 couple of months, I think. You know, so this guy's been really busy. We'll see. We'll see where the next couple of movies take them. And finally, Jordan Peel's Untitled 4 film that was set for
Starting point is 00:37:46 October 23rd, 2026 release date has been pulled. What? This is the second time. It's a Kiki Palmer effect. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 00:38:01 First his career. Yeah, I don't get it because I've been waiting for a new film from this guy for a while. I mean, what's going on? He just hit the slump or what happened? I don't think it's a slump. I just...
Starting point is 00:38:16 He's doing more producing. Maybe he doesn't think the movie's ready yet. Yeah, maybe he's a bit of a perfectionist, maybe. Because he's very precise with his filmmaking. Like there's nothing. There's no shot. There's nothing sitting in the background of a shot that's on accident. You know, so I can see that.
Starting point is 00:38:38 That kind of makes sense. I sure hope we get to get film. He should pull that twilight zone then because that was horrible. Yeah, but he just announced that one, right? He didn't direct any episodes or anything. He was a producer. He had some stroke in that one. But, I mean, you know, when their producers is different, right,
Starting point is 00:38:52 than when they're actually directing. So, yeah, I guess. So that one in Mortal Kombat, that one also got pushed back about six months, a new Mortal Kombat movie. That one makes sense, though, because they want the summer blockbuster crowd, not the late October horror fans.
Starting point is 00:39:12 The trailer, I saw the trailer today. It looks pretty good. What's Carl Urban doing in there, though? He's just, like, in regular clothing and just kind of walking around like a goofball. Johnny Cage. Okay, I didn't see him any fight scenes in the trailer, but I'm sure it's just a,
Starting point is 00:39:27 an early look, you know. Well, he's doing that whole fish out of water, kind of like, what am I doing here? I'm just an action star, you know, which I don't think the video game Johnny Cage was like that, but we'll see. Right. Seems like an older Johnny Cage. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:43 And he's real good in the boys, and I guess they're doing their last season coming up, I think. So, yeah. I like Carler, but I'd like to see him in more stuff. Yeah, he's always good. He's kind of typecast, but he always delivers. So, yeah, definitely. all right that is it for the news all right that means pedro it's time for us to go home mama's calling supper's ready and i think the meth is being cooked
Starting point is 00:40:13 so we're going to go on down to the trailer park very dark man that's like right all right well it may be some dark uh dark movies tonight let's find out brian is going bring us the big the small and sometimes the very very weird what's the What's the first new trailer tonight, Brian? First one we're going to talk about is VHS Halloween. I love these, man. I'm always a sucker for these movies, man. Every year now, every year they have.
Starting point is 00:40:43 And you know what? Every year I get excited and every year that passes, Brian ever puts it on the calendar, like ever. I have to talk about it in my cool of the week. But this one looks like they have like no budget. Did you guys get the same vibe from this one? Like, whoa. It's, I'm looking at the
Starting point is 00:41:01 directors for this one. I've only heard of one director which is Paco Plaza. Oh yeah. Direct movies. Right. Yeah. Last year they went kind of big in a lot of ways. Sure. I'm always, like I said, I'm always excited about these.
Starting point is 00:41:21 More times than not, they're going to hit with me. I think the only one that I don't like is 99. The one that has, well, I mean, we're not going to get to the the segments. But that's the only one that has really not really hit with me. But other than that, they all kind of deliver and they're all just a good time. And like I said, Shudder seems to have something going with them with just giving us yearly once every early October, you know?
Starting point is 00:41:47 Sure. And it's a good thing too because they just canceled a creep show. They canceled that show. I think they announced it a couple days ago. So now that we're getting the VHS yearly, at least we still have that. So yeah, and then this year it seems like the whole theme is going to be Halloween, the actual holiday of Halloween, you know, so it could be something like trick or treat where it's like a bunch of little vignettes, but all happening within the same night, you know, and then they crisscross at the end. I'm always a sucker for when they do that stuff in anthology films. So yeah, I know, I'm excited for it, man.
Starting point is 00:42:19 They always get me with these. I get giddy with these VHS movies at this point. What do you think, Lance? I'm the same way. You know, I'm a sucker for all of them. Even the ones that aren't very well received by most people I still have fun with. And it's kind of cool because if you're watching a segment and you don't like it, you know, just stick around 10, 15 minutes. So, and I think a lot of good directors have come from these, right?
Starting point is 00:42:46 Like, I think a lot of good, really good directors have kind of cut their teeth. And I'm not too worried about it, you know, looking like it's kind of schlocky or not filmed, you know, with a big budget. No, that's the gimmick. That's the gimmick. Well, they're getting back to basics, right? And they're given new directors a chance to get out there. So it definitely serves its purpose. And for me, these movies are always fun.
Starting point is 00:43:09 You like them, don't you, Brian, for the most part? Yeah. I like that we're getting, sorry if you're any background noise, my neighbor. I like that we're getting brand new directors because we could be getting the next great horror director. you never know they could be being introduced because I'm looking at some of these directors and a lot of them have done like short films and the smaller stuff so and it does have a nice retro indie feel to the to the segments that I've seen in the trailer so I'm I'm here for it
Starting point is 00:43:49 maybe maybe Brian will put it on the schedule for us Pedro we'll see I'll tell you what Even if it doesn't go on the schedule, we'll do a bonus episode. All right. All right. I think we've been doing that already, but okay. It's all good. Put it on your 30 days of Halloween that you should start like next week. Oh, we'll finish.
Starting point is 00:44:12 We promise we'll finish it this year. Promise. This hit Shutter October 3rd. All right. And if we run out of horror movies for the 31 days, Pedro, I'll throw in some hallmark Christmas. There you go. Which are, in a lot of ways, are horror movies within themselves,
Starting point is 00:44:27 in different ways. And our next and final trailer, we're going to talk about is 28 years later, The Bone Temple. This is directed by Nia Dacosta, who directed the, I think it was the 2020 Candyman movie. Yep.
Starting point is 00:44:46 Written by Alex Garland and produced by Danny Boyle. I am going to pass it to you guys. I got to step away for a second. Yeah, all right. Well, Pedro, you can probably say, well, you can probably say more because I haven't seen the 28 years later yet. Well, I mean, in typical fashion, when near the Costa, first of all, she started really talking down the Candyman remake and the Marvels saying that they handicapped her, that she really didn't get to express her vision. But it's different with this new 28 years later. Of course, it's going to be right.
Starting point is 00:45:25 That's what she's promoting. And this one she felt like she was able to express herself more, which is weird because she didn't write it or produce it. She just had to direct it, but anyways. And so I was one of those people that didn't really connect with the way the series was taken, whereas more of like they're back to like just medieval almost like, you know, there's no cars anymore. They're just, you know, going back to the old ways, right?
Starting point is 00:45:55 with the spears. On horseback. Yeah. All that stuff, you know. The Walking Dead season 11, as I call it, that era. Okay. All right.
Starting point is 00:46:03 I got you. I can visualize it now. And so I don't know. I didn't really jive with that. And a lot of it is me because I was so used to just having the chaos of being in the city, like that urban setting that we got in the first two. Oh, yeah. 20 movies.
Starting point is 00:46:18 Real frant. Everything was real frantic in the first. Right. Whereas this is like a whole new story and they got like these skulls that that are just kind of like, I don't know, it's just weird. So this, I'm not really excited for this movie, but I'm going to watch it because it's, it's 28 years later movie. It's a sequel.
Starting point is 00:46:35 I saw the first one. But we'll see what happens, you know? And so you still haven't seen the first one, right? No, but I mean, I've heard about it. And there's like some weird British, like, I don't know if, is he a host of a talk show and he got in sexual innuendo trouble or something like that? That's, is, am I, am I far off or am I kind of close? Are you talking about the zombie dong?
Starting point is 00:47:03 Well, no, I'm talking about the, okay, so from what I understand, there's a dude that comes in at the end, like we're in a track suit with gold chains and. Yes, that's right. He's supposed to be based on a British talk show host, right? Yeah, yeah. So remember how like, in weapons, there was a whole tonal shift in that last moment of the movie where it was kind of like a little comedic. The same thing happens in 28 years later. It's like, you know, our main character, which is this kid, just goes through this whole
Starting point is 00:47:36 deal. And then at the end, there's like this weird comedy segment where like these guys right out of like a clock where Gorinch come out. And they just kind of surround him. Little jerigies, huh? Yeah. And they just kind of surround him. Except they're wearing like track suits. And like you said, Like, go and chase weird. And they surround him, and then that's where the movie ends. So I guess that's how it's going to pick up in the sequel. And so, yeah, I don't know that. I don't like any of that stuff.
Starting point is 00:48:05 Like, I just, it just didn't connect. Too wacky. Too wacky. Too wacky. Too weird, too absurd, all that stuff. And then I want my chaos on the inner city. You know, I want to see these people with rage running, running, chasing other people. And then that, we didn't really get that as much.
Starting point is 00:48:21 But, but, but I'm still going to. watch it because again it they'll create i'm a big fan of the people behind it and maybe maybe they'll turn me maybe now that my brain is more prepared for what i'm going to see um i'm going to be more accepting of it because people forget like for a lot of us when we saw 28 years later it was a mind fuck like we were not ready to see what we saw we were not that wasn't our expectations of 28 years later right so but now with the sequel we know what to expect so it might land a little easier for us so Yeah, we'll see. January something or other. It's doing dump months, so that's concerning.
Starting point is 00:48:58 But we'll see what happens. They got three of them to release, right, Brian? Yeah, this is the second of a trilogy. But they haven't filmed the third one yet, so. Ah, that could take a while. God, I hope there's not a strike, right? That'll throw another COVID. That'll throw everything off.
Starting point is 00:49:20 Well, don't say that, Lance. That'll throw a lot of things off. Not just the movies. Yeah. And then I didn't see what's his name, the guy from Kickass. So I'm assuming he's not in this one. Let me see the cast list. Yeah, I don't know his name.
Starting point is 00:49:38 I just call him kickass. Yeah, the Kickass guy. Wasn't he married to a woman like 20 years older than him or something? He was. He still is, I think. Hey, that's true love, man. It's blind. Craven the Hunter. there you go so
Starting point is 00:49:55 so I guess in the sequel this little kid who happens to be you know Craven the Hunter is his son he's just going to be out in the wild by himself without Craven the Hunter looking for him because he's just not he's just not in the movie
Starting point is 00:50:09 and then I think killing Murphy is he's going to pop up somehow because he's already been announced so he's still around after all these years in that movie that's kind of and I think part three, if everything goes good, is going to merge everyone together.
Starting point is 00:50:26 So everybody's coming back for part three, but that one hasn't been filmed yet because they want to see how this one does. So we'll see. Yeah, Killion Murphy, they're going to have to explain that good for me because last we've seen, they was being rescued, weren't they?
Starting point is 00:50:42 They flagged down a plane. Kind of, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's going to the mainland. They went to the mainland. Yeah, so we'll see. I mean, I'm here for it. I thought the shots in the trailer look great. I'm assuming they used the same filming method as the first one with the iPhones.
Starting point is 00:51:05 Those 3,000 iPhones that they put in like circular motion. Yeah. Whatever works. And I agree with you, Pedro. The ending was kind of wacky and kind of came out of nowhere and made no sense. But I think, or at least I hope, with the scene. sequel, it will make sense. We'll see.
Starting point is 00:51:29 And this hits theaters. You guys probably already said it. Sorry, I had to step away. January 16th. Okay. And that is the last trailer. All right. Let me throw on my little...
Starting point is 00:51:45 Hold on. Where are we out of here? Get your notes pulled up, man. Bear with me here. You're taking the place of Philly the Kid. By the way, Brian, The Fabulous Philip is gone, man. RIP Fabulous Phil.
Starting point is 00:52:00 He's going to go to Philly the Kid. I'm sure he's going to be happy to hear that when he's back because I was listening to one of our old re-uploads, and he was desperately asking to please be named Philly the Kid and not Fabulous Philip anymore. So there you go. I thought that's why we kept calling it Fabulous Philip because he was desperately asking for it.
Starting point is 00:52:19 I guess we'll stick with it then. All right. I'm going to tag in for Fabulous Philip here this week. So this week, we shine the podcast spotlight on Tune to Decay. Join your Decane host as he spews his twisted thoughts on punk rock, horror movies, and who knows what else. That's a nice little combination there. And I think the dude's in Florida. So maybe I'll meet up with him at horror nights or something.
Starting point is 00:52:48 There you go. Maybe you could watch movies with him and rate him one star, one out of ten, because it's going to be such a good time. Um, let's see. I hope who knows what else does not include politics because that's going to be a problem, but we'll see. Right. We have an avid fan who keeps on asking for Wolf Creek 3 updates. Here's what we know so far, brother. The plan is for the new film to be called Wolf Creek Legacy.
Starting point is 00:53:14 The film is set to release in 2026 and Sean Lahive will be the directors will be in the director's seat again. That's all we know. To be clear, we are in no way associated with the film crew. but we will provide updates as we learn of them. So if you're a bot or if you're a real person, either way, you got your update. Wolf Creek 3. Matt Wood says, did someone say second commentary?
Starting point is 00:53:37 Uh-oh. Uh-oh. What is that about? What are you talking about? I don't know. I think some of our patrons are going to get a second round. Oh, that's right. Yes, yes.
Starting point is 00:53:48 Yeah, if you're a patron and you've already had your first round, send us your picks. Yeah, and please choose the Nightingale. That's a great movie to do a commentary. Yeah, that was such a feel-good episode. Oh, but, all right. Speaking of the Nightingale, here's the guy that requested it. Norelian Maslu, he says, yo, you just heard the newest episode and sounding like, y'all were down. Let me know a date and time, and I'll be there.
Starting point is 00:54:15 So he's talking about a second commentary, I guess, or a third on his case. or whatever. I don't think we're doing that. We're not doing the night. No, no, we're never, no,
Starting point is 00:54:24 that was one that we banned on the spot because I was there for you with you guys. That one would never be, probably ever talked about it. And we're actually breaking our own rule right now by talking about that fucking movie. All right, in response to Rob Zombie's Halloween,
Starting point is 00:54:40 Gary the Going, Gary the Going, Murphy says, Good Phil. The going, wow, okay. He likes,
Starting point is 00:54:46 he likes Rob Zombie movies. He's not all bad, right i don't know man i don't care about and they're not and they're not all good i don't care about michael meyers being abused as a child which made them become a murder fucking adult that's fucking stupid all right in response to together uh michael preseris says the end was wow well that certainly was that um that's that cgri or whatever that final shot was that was definitely while. Michael J. Marin says, got to meet Hal House LLC writer Joy Bandali and actor Ryan
Starting point is 00:55:20 Jennifer Jones, aka Sarah at the exclusive screening in L.A. All right. Well, I missed that one and that's in my backyard. A very special thank you to patron, Steve Loblad, who up his monthly patronage to $10. Thanks, man. He used the world to us. Yeah, good. Thank you. You're going to give you unlimited commentaries for you, by the way for the $10. Just, you know, welcome to the buffet of unlimited commentaries for you.
Starting point is 00:55:49 And don't forget, we rolled out a T-shirt contest. If you leave us a review on Apple Podcasts, a five-star review, by the way. We will send you a free, yes, free or returns T-shirt of your choice, designed by our main man, Steve, from the geeks.
Starting point is 00:56:04 He needs to come on here, by the way. It hasn't been on here in a while. It's been a while. That's how you have to do. Just leave us a review. A five-star review would be nice. telling us what you like about the horror returns and get as creative as you like. Once you leave the review, just drop us an email at the horror returns at gmail.com
Starting point is 00:56:22 with your name, address, and the style, color, and size you want, and we will hook you up. Be sure to put the word contest in the subject line. One price per person per address. That's the only rule. So see that this size, go to thehorroriturns.com and click shop now button. And thanks for listening. So we reserve the right to limit quantities. so jump on and leave that review now.
Starting point is 00:56:44 That's a little aggressive. We'll see. We'll see. Our show intro and our new lowest come from Steve Carls here from The Geeks. And to be on the lookout for more great stuff from Steve. Our original school, our word comes from Natsalani. By the way, I still have my, I have a collectible. I have the vintage.
Starting point is 00:57:03 The first horror return shirt ever. With the Reaper. With the Reaper. Yep, I have that one. That's a great one. I got that one with me and Lance Roomed in Chicago way back when over at a, with the binge catch guys
Starting point is 00:57:16 when we went to that little get together. Way back in 2018, I think, or 2017. Wow. It was a long time. Lollapalooza. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We all shared on Airbnb and that was a classic because Daniel was there.
Starting point is 00:57:32 We had all the characters there for those three days. If you would like to help the show, please consider becoming a Patreon patron. We will let you pay. the movies for a future show at any amount and for $5 or more a month. Also pick a commentary for a future bonus show. And now it's time for feature attractions. All right.
Starting point is 00:57:53 We will check out Toxy Old and New. So we're going to get started with the Toxic Avenger from 1984. And here's a little trivia. Tromoville has a monstrous new hero. The Toxic Adventure is born when we meet Mobboy Melvin, who falls into a vat of toxic waste. now evil doers will have a lot to lose. The directors were Lloyd Kaufman and Michael Hearst.
Starting point is 00:58:16 The writers were Lloyd Kaufman with Joe Ritter and Gay Parrington, Terry. Well, shooting in Shinbone Alley, a homeless man stole a prop gun from one of the trailers and threatened the crew. That's kind of interesting. That fits that entire little vibe they had there, by the way. Sure it does. An 18-year-old Marisa Tomea appears as an extra coming out of a shower. Wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:41 So there we go. So the Toxic Avenger, 1984. So I'll get started because I did. Trauma in general means a lot to me because it's very nostalgic. When my parents came to this country, I'm a first generation Mexican-American. So when my parents came to this country, they spoke no English. So they came around the time of the VHS era when it was. barely starting to pick up. So my dad bought a VHS. And because he spoke no English, he couldn't
Starting point is 00:59:16 see dramas or he couldn't see comedies because he didn't understand them. So when people don't talk the language, they're very visually stimulated. So what they do is they rent horror movies, right? Because all you do is see the splatter into sex and you know what's happening. So I remember we would go to the video store, like some of the very first video stores. and there it was man like like we read we probably ran a toxic avenger part one maybe like 10 times because that's my dad would just sit there and start laughing and he knew what's happened with the mop and you know especially because in the original toxic adventure that guy looks real nerdy like really nerdy oh sure sure i mean peter dinglidge is it's a little person but i don't i wouldn't consider him looking like nerdy like you could stuff him in a locker or anything like that whereas the guy from part ones definitely does um or the original i should say. So this movie. You could stuff Peter Dinkler
Starting point is 01:00:09 if you wanted to. Oh boy. But he's, I feel like he would be too thick. Like he's too wide to stick him in the locker. He put up a fight. Let's put it that way. He would put up a fight for sure.
Starting point is 01:00:22 He could probably fuck you up, honestly, because, but this guy in the original could and you look at him. He was cronny. And that was his job. He was hired for that purpose. And so, and so, yeah, so I'm really nostalgic for this movie. Just trauma in general.
Starting point is 01:00:35 And one thing I got to say with these two movies is that you have to be in tune with the trauma, like, sense of humor. If that's not your vibe, you're not going to like either of these movies, you know? You're going to find them lowbrow. You're going to find them kind of like just too wacky, you know? And so with me, I connect with this kind of humor. So I'm all in on both of these films. So the first one is just, it's typical Lloyd Kaufman's sense of humor. You know, a lot of toilet bowl humor.
Starting point is 01:01:06 A lot of tits. A lot of tits, you know, TNA stuff. But there's also a message there. There's like an environmental stuff going on. You know, there's, because one of the things that you learn about trauma and Lloyd Kaufman is that he's very progressive when it comes to a lot of his views. And he's always kind of like sprinkling that through a lot of his films, you know. Class of Newcomb High is another one that that's very popular, that I'm surprised I think got to remade. And so, and so, and so, yeah, the 1984 version is one that I grew up with.
Starting point is 01:01:40 I love it. I see it at least once, like, every five years. The secrets are just as good. And, you know, this movie hits for me, you know? I like, I like the villains in it, you know, the story, the character. And so it's a movie that really resonates with me. What do you guys think of it? All right.
Starting point is 01:02:02 So I'm watching this movie and it's I'm looking at my at my phone not because I'm not entertained, but I'm curious how far into the movie it takes before they hit these beats. So exactly two minutes and 58 seconds into the movie. Okay. You've got a gay joke. You've got several fat jokes, right? That's right. You know, and you've got a retarded joke with the word used, with the word actually used. So yeah, boys and girls, we're back in Tromaville. There's no doubt about it. We're firmly back in Tromaville, New Jersey, right? So, yeah, it's, and then you got these guys doing a death race 2000, and they're naming off by very ugly slurs, right?
Starting point is 01:02:50 All of the ethnic groups that they're going to go after. Yep. And not only are they going to run them over, but they're going to back up and smash their heads in on top of that. So you got a great setup there if you want to be entertained and you're not easily offended. Because Lloyd Kaufman, there's no doubt. This dude gives zero fucks about offending anyone. Sometimes it works, you know, sometimes it doesn't.
Starting point is 01:03:16 You know, we did review a couple of trauma movies. I thought one of them, the Sergeant Kubuki man, I thought it was firing on all cylinders. And that was a hero that we really needed. and the other one we saw which one was it Brian with the guy that Tim Curry Yeah, I remember that show
Starting point is 01:03:35 Yeah To me that didn't hit That was just gross out for gross out's sake But yeah we're definitely back in Tromaville You know there's no doubt And then you got the You get the classic setup right The super sexy girl that lures him in
Starting point is 01:03:51 And says oh Come up what's his name Melvin right In this one it's Melvin the Mopwold So she's like, come on, Melvin, I'll let you dittle me in the back room or whatever, you know. And then she's, it's so silly because she says, my favorite color is pink. I want you to wear this pink tutu. It'll really turn me on.
Starting point is 01:04:10 The guy is so clueless that he buys into it. And he goes back there. And when he ends up kissing a goat or something like that, they bring a goat in when he thinks he's kissing her. And so all this is like 10 minutes into the movie. and then I think by the time he makes the change and you've got the villains I mean for an hour what is it like an hour and 26 minute movie
Starting point is 01:04:35 they put so much in this film they get so many characters so many storylines and they all work the the taco restaurant whatever it was called that was pretty obviously a retrofitted 80s version Taco Bell where they just kind of change the name on it and stuff like that
Starting point is 01:04:54 and the and the goot and the goofy villains that were in there and all the different ways that he that he took care of them like the like the grease that I don't know about you guys but do y'all ever go to a fast food restaurant and they actually dip the taco shells in Greece
Starting point is 01:05:09 is that a thing I've never worked in a yeah I think so I think I've seen that especially with like street vendors they have the thing outside and they'll do like they'll do the shells right in front of you because it starts as a soft tortilla and they dip it in there so yeah
Starting point is 01:05:26 I've seen it happen. Okay. All right. All right. Makes sense. So, yeah, that was a great scene. Those were some villains you kind of love to hate. And they were just in there to fuck things up, right?
Starting point is 01:05:37 They didn't have a message or anything like that. And I really enjoyed that. Go ahead. Land. Sorry. Yeah, no, as you get into the movie and the stakes get higher, right? Like you've got politicians involved in it and things like that. And then he meets his blind girlfriend in the taco restaurant.
Starting point is 01:05:55 And of course, she's super sexy, right? Of course. You know, she wants to touch his face and he's kind of questionable at first. Oh, I don't want you to touch my face. You know, I'm disgusting. And she loves him anyway. And the fucking voice, well, once he becomes toxic, this is like a bad Japanese dove movie or something, right? Yes.
Starting point is 01:06:17 But that was, there was a purpose to everything. That's what I love about this movie. I want to talk a little bit about satire because I think, people, especially with Lloyd Kaufman. I'm not saying that he doesn't get out of hand because sometimes he does. The aforementioned terra firmer would, you know, there's proof of that. But I think in general, like, he was always trying to use satire to tell the world how ugly it could be. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 01:06:43 And I think, you know, I've missed satire lately just because of the pacification of America that we've gone through. But I think satire is important. And I think it's a way through comedy to remind us of how ignorant of a world that we live in sometimes, where there's a lot of racism, oppression, you know, abuse, all that stuff. And I think Toxic Avenger works as a good allegory for all that stuff, you know. And I think that's the reason why it's delivered as a big, like, live action cartoon in a lot of ways. You know, you have all the wacky names of the villains. You go see Garface.
Starting point is 01:07:20 And then the crew of Misfits, they have their own little wacky names themselves. and the way he disposes of them. But ultimately, it's about this idea of like, like ableism, you know, and putting down people that have disabilities. And the catharsis in this movie is that he becomes the toxic adventure, and he takes all of them out, you know, for what they've done to him. And I think the reason why the girlfriend is blind is because, you know, when you fall for somebody,
Starting point is 01:07:55 when you legitimately fall for them, you don't see how they are on the outside. You see how they are on the inside. So there's a lot of little messages like that. And I think this film gets misunderstood a lot of the time. But I think Lloyd Kaufman is a lot smarter than he gives off. And it's all an act, you know. And then later on, when he became a character himself to South Troma and its products,
Starting point is 01:08:16 he kind of embraced that wacky old man that he's still doing to this day. I mean, I just saw him. he came out well he has a cameo in the new one but but james gunn who was you know lloyd cobman was one of his mentors early on he's always also putting them in his movies too um so yeah so i i this movie has more to say than what we give it credit for did you get all that brian when you were watching it when i first watched it or when i watch it now i guess when you watch it now you know yeah i mean i get that when i watch it now but when i originally watch it This is very nostalgic for me also.
Starting point is 01:08:53 This takes me back to a time when I couldn't. This took me back to a time when I was, I had to sneak some of these movies to watch them because my parents wouldn't let me watch them. Because I was, when this came out, I was four years old. So I didn't see this until like the early 90s. And it is an adult cartoon come to life. The characters are so.
Starting point is 01:09:20 over the top with not only their words but their facial expressions just hamming it up but it's good ham though and we have a lot of my favorite scenes Lance already brought it up the restaurant scene which we get uh right no you guys are familiar with Patrick Kilpatrick
Starting point is 01:09:44 he was one of the robbers he's been in a ton of movies and Toxic Avengers is an icon because he's had multiple movies cartoon series with the toxic crusaders Oh my God
Starting point is 01:10:02 comic books video games just all of it and you guys said it all and yeah this movie takes me back but I wasn't getting all that stuff that Patrick or Pedro was
Starting point is 01:10:15 talking about until I got older, but yeah, a lot of that stuff is in there. Yeah, and everybody, everybody wants to work with Uncle Lloyd, right? Like, it's got to be so much fucking fun to be on one of these sets, I would think. And one of the guys that, that, again, being nostalgic and I remember was an actor by the name of R.L. Stein, which plays the mayor in this movie, because he was in all his movies, and he was always the villain that big happy guy. That's right. Yeah. He was always...
Starting point is 01:10:46 Like the King fan. Yeah, you always play the same character and the same motivation. It just wouldn't change. It was just a different movie. And he was, I think he's passed away, but he was definitely one of the staples of those early trauma movies, you know? But yeah, it's just a good film. Again, I think Lloyd Kahnman uses a lot of that what would be classified as trash to deliver the message. Sure.
Starting point is 01:11:13 But that's what distinguishes him or his company from other, you know, slucky companies. Because, again, he always had a message and he always tried to like be artful. As disgusting as some of his totally bold humor was, he always tried to create it, presented as art. You know, whereas other more schlockier companies of the same time, they were just there to gross you out with absolutely no rhyme or reason for it. And so I think the media will lump all of them to get. together and would be like oh no this thing sucks it's horrible it's not art it's trash and and it wasn't you know so um so yeah so the toxic adventure in 1984 definitely gets a a good great from me we'll get into the ratings in a little bit i wonder i wonder what nez thinks about toxic avenger
Starting point is 01:12:02 oh 10 on 10 he'll say 10 on 10 yeah it is dude that movie's hell of good oh shit what the first one of the original yes yes hey help us put it over will we been putting it over. So you add your part to it. I saw that's the very first trauma film that I had seen. I never even heard of trauma or anything. I was babysitting my friend or my mom's friends, kids, and they had cable. This is right when microwave popcorn came out. So, oh man, good times. Yeah, they had a microwave that I didn't know how to work, took me forever to figure it out so I made some popcorn which I burned but I still ate it and they had cable so I walked over this is back in the day we had to walk up to the TV to turn the cable box and to get to
Starting point is 01:12:56 showtime and it was late at night so the the Friday night nasties were on and that was over then the toxic Avenger came on I was like what's this so I sat and watched it and a few minutes in we get some sexy time and some boobs. Sure. And then it just went haywire from there with Melvin the Mop Boys. So I was like, what is this? So I was so blown away by it. I mean, because right out the gate, you get that kid getting his head crushed on the car.
Starting point is 01:13:30 Yeah. You're getting some guy getting it on in the locker room with his girlfriend. Then Melvin walks in and she's threatening to kill him. And it's... Only in Trumbaville. Yeah, I was like, what's happening here? And it just kept getting more wild and wild as the movie went on. And then I just like, oh, my God, it was over with.
Starting point is 01:13:53 I mean, it was stupid, of course. Again, I didn't know what trauma was. But then after that, I was introduced, I would go to the video store to try to find that movie because I wanted to see it again. Yeah. Nez, did you ever watch Class of Nukem High? Yes. Yeah, that was another. one that was part of the whole Tromaville,
Starting point is 01:14:14 Sergeant Kabuki Man, all those movies. Yeah, because after, I said, okay, I know what trauma is now. So I kind of would go to the section. I'd look for the little trauma symbol. And then, yeah, Kabuki Man, Tromio v. Juliet, all that type of stuff. Serf Ninjas Must Die.
Starting point is 01:14:33 That was another one that was popular on that. Surf Nazis must die, right? Serf Nazis, there you go. Only Loy Koppel. and will make a movie called Serb Nossus Must Die. Sure. Yeah, so I was like, what is this? And I just, I didn't realize it was so raunchy and just full of sexy time and practical effects back in the all or nothing days.
Starting point is 01:14:59 Real fire. Real fire, Naz. It wasn't CGI. So I was like, okay. I mean, I realized, I mean, they weren't all winners. They couldn't all be toxic avenger. So I was like all about trauma. I started just renting anything that said trauma on it
Starting point is 01:15:15 before the internet, so I couldn't go watch a trailer or anything. I mean, they weren't even like advertising these type of crazy films in like Fangoria. I mean, they did later on, but in the beginning stages,
Starting point is 01:15:29 they didn't. So I was just like, man, and Lloyd Kaufman, that name always stuck out to me the most. So I was like, wow, okay.
Starting point is 01:15:37 So, I mean, just falling down, just being a part of Tromaville, and the trauma entertainment universe or whatever they're calling it, I was like, man, and then as the 80s rolled on,
Starting point is 01:15:48 we rolled in the 90s and up to now, we're still getting trauma films. Are they all good? No. Even like if we all made a movie and then we went to trauma, hey, can you put this out for us? Yeah, cool.
Starting point is 01:16:03 But I was blown away with what I saw with the first Toxic Avenger. I just couldn't believe how raw and edgy and raunchy it was. I was just like, man. So I could see why I was playing late at night. And then once it started coming on, like, Ronda's up all night, it was just...
Starting point is 01:16:23 Oh, yeah. And Gilbert Godfrey. It was just cut to shit. Gilbert Godfrey and Rhonda Shear. Yeah, I was like, man, they just... Of course, it was just regular paid cable, but they couldn't show at all. So, but I was...
Starting point is 01:16:40 I was just like, man. So years and years later, I'm in New York City at New York Comic-Con. I go over to the trauma booth, and there's Lloyd Kaufman. And I finally got to thank him for introducing me to trauma and Toxic Venture being my favorite film. I love everything. I kiss his butt. Every time I see him, he's so nice. He's so cool.
Starting point is 01:17:04 He made a bumper from my show one time. He even made that video because you guys were trashed and tear up. So, I mean, Lloyd Coffin's an amazing guy. I mean, as far as the times that I've met him throughout the years, I just saw him in San Diego at Comic-Con. I bought Tromio and Juliet on Blu-ray and had him sign it. And I just, I mean, I love the man. I mean, every time I see him, he's like, yeah, just call me Uncle Lloyd.
Starting point is 01:17:31 So from that day forward, Uncle Lloyd. But Toxic Avenger, for what it was, yes, it was low budget. I mean, but they had the budget to make all those practical effects, to make Toxy look how he looked and just them going for it. Like, they didn't care what they were going to put on the screen. They didn't care about killing a little kid and getting having his head run over. They didn't care about having some pedophile gal hooking little kids on the street. I mean, that's how I was like, damn, man. They whipped for it in this film.
Starting point is 01:18:11 But it was amazing. I loved it. Of course, my favorite scene is the little taco hut or whatever that place was called. That was my favorite team. That was my favorite, too. But everything about it, I love what Toxie looks like. Melvin the Mott Boy was awesome. All the little evil henchmen, a cigar face, and all those guys.
Starting point is 01:18:35 And was it the mayor? that was running all the bad stuff. Yeah, I love that. That actor was in all his movies by early on. He's passed away since, but that heavyset dude, he always puts his mind on my face. So, I mean, but the movie was amazing. For introducing me to the whole Tromiverse, I was like, wow.
Starting point is 01:18:53 I just did not believe that they could make movies like this. I mean, they didn't make them now, yeah, but back then it was new. I mean, we had our edgy horror films with blood and gutter, and all that, but for blood and guts and sex and violence and everything all in one movie, and then add a superhero element with the Toxic Avenger, I mean, I'm
Starting point is 01:19:17 all about it. I thought it was awesome. The 2-2, the mop, everything. I mean, stuff in a little person in a dryer. I mean, where are you going to get that? Where else are you going to get that? I mean, it was amazing. I love
Starting point is 01:19:33 this film. It's an amazing film. Part of my childhood, and I'm glad that I was able to talk to Lloyd and tell him how much I love it and everything, not everything is done, but a majority of the films that he's directed, I've enjoyed. So, yeah, Toxic Avenger, the original, two thumbs up for me. Yeah, one of the things that he did that was masterful and really ahead of his time is that he branded his trauma. He went out there and he created a whole, he created a whole mythology around.
Starting point is 01:20:07 Brownet, you have Tromaville where all these movies take place. It's almost like he was one of the first ones that gave us like a shared universe in a lot of ways because every movie takes place within that universe in Tromaville. And then the way he marketed himself as is cool, like he's kind of like your uncle, your crazy uncle, you know? So he did a great job in the way he marketed his brand himself. And it just added to that myth of like trauma and Lloyd Kaufman. And he monetized that.
Starting point is 01:20:34 So good for him. You know, he made a lot of money off of that. Now, later on, because in the beginning, he was making the movies. Then later on, he started just picking up and distributing. That's where a lot of like, like, like rabbit grannies and redneck zombies, like those are not trauma made films. They're just trauma distributed. And that's where a lot of the qualities started going down because he was just distributing anything. Like people would hit them up here, put the label on it, take it, you know.
Starting point is 01:21:00 So, so there is a lot of bad movies under the trauma banner. but the ones that he made are really stand out and they're actually pretty for the most part like nez said they're really good films so yeah yeah the early days the early days right yeah he was kind of like charles before charles band right before he started doing all that interconnected stuff with the full moon and all that yeah they were around the same time but well Lloyd knew how to market himself better than charles band charles ban is just like a carney like an old carny I always trying to sell you something you know
Starting point is 01:21:35 I mean the full moon stuff I mean I seen the stuff from the 70s I loved all that but yeah as we rolled into the 80s with the doll man and that type of stuff and then when the ginger dead man and the evil bong and all that nonsense I mean I guess
Starting point is 01:21:55 man cool whatever but I love more of the earlier full moon feature stuff the tour is trapped the laser blast the the first puppet master films and all the earlier things like that. I loved all that. But yeah, I mean, TromaVils is the same way.
Starting point is 01:22:11 I mean, with the earlier stuff and like you said, with the stuff that Lloyd Coffin made, those are the ones that I love. Those are the ones that I buy when I pick up. I mean, every time I go to a con and Troma's there, I always buy a movie. I mean, I could buy them all that at once
Starting point is 01:22:29 and then never go to the booth again. But I think, to me, going to the trauma booth every year no matter what con it's at it can be at San Diego it can be at some small mom and pop convention I will always buy something from them I mean they always have something there
Starting point is 01:22:44 I plan what I get and then I'll look at some more on the okay next con I'll buy this like I bought all the Toxic Avenger films I could have bought that big pack in one but I didn't I bought them one at a time from Tox Avenger 2
Starting point is 01:23:00 citizen Toxy and all that Last temptation. Yeah, I just took my time and buy it them all. Yeah, like a journey. Are they as good as the first one? No. I mean, they just got cornyer and cheesier as it went along. Eventually, I will get the Toxic Crusaders, the animated show that Toxie is in.
Starting point is 01:23:23 But that's like in a one big box set. So they didn't break that up. Plus, they have the little figures and T-shirts and everything else they'll sell. I'll eventually buy more stuff from them because I think I bought Toxic Avenger I don't know how many times they came out on DVD a bunch of times I bought them then once the Blu-Rays came out
Starting point is 01:23:45 the Blu-ray came out the one with the green shell case and then there's just the regular blue one do I have both of them of course I do Of course you've got black Christmas dude You got the Black Christmas remake man so I know you're getting everything I don't know how many versions of Toxic Avenger I have I have the unrated one.
Starting point is 01:24:05 I have the rated one. I even have the TV version. I bought that TV version one from... TV version. The one that's all cut up with all the good stuff cut out of it. So it's like 10 minutes long? Somebody was selling it at a convention. It was like they just recorded it straight from USA or whatever.
Starting point is 01:24:27 So I'm like, man, I'm that big of a toxic Avenger fan. So I just give it to me. I'll put it on the show. with the rest of them. So, but, I mean, I wish they would make these shirts, these shirts for fat boys because I would definitely buy one of those. I love the monster shirts. They sell those.
Starting point is 01:24:48 They sell them. They're on T-Public, man. I know. Give me a 5X one and I'll rock it around and wear it. Yeah. I've already ordered one, man, in the lime green. Yeah, I mean, all those shirts they had on at the end, yeah, that was awesome. I loved it.
Starting point is 01:25:05 All right, so ratings. I think we've all said our piece on the Toxic Adventure 1984. Lance, you go first, and then I'll go, and then Brian, then that's going to go. And I, yeah, see, with these trauma movies, for me, it's either, it's either I really love it or I really don't like it that much. I don't hate any, because I love the, you know, the workmanship they put into these, the passion that everybody involved has. So I'm going eight and a half on this one. right at Kabuki Man or did I give it a 9? Do you remember Brian? I don't remember. I love Kabuki Man.
Starting point is 01:25:40 That's another good movie. Yeah, this is 8.5-and-hameh. Okay, so 8.5 out of 10. Okay, I'm going to be in your neighborhood, maybe a little lower 8 out of 10. I thought this movie was great. I've seen it so many times, though, but yeah, I'm going to go with 8 on 10. Brian, what do you give it? Yeah, I'm at 8. I think if I would have seen this movie for the first time now,
Starting point is 01:26:07 this movie would have been a 10, but I think because I'm so desensitized and this stuff doesn't really hit me like it did as a child. It kind of loses its luster a little bit, but it's still a great movie with an iconic character, so 8 out of 10. All right, Ness, what do you give it? Oh, this is straight up 10, man.
Starting point is 01:26:28 Like I said, this was my introduction. This was my introduction. their trauma and I never I never forgot it and even if I did meet Lloyd Kaufman all these times I I still because I mean this movie it changed my life to see like damn like I said all this in one movie exactly yeah they packed a lot into an hour and 26 minutes dance yeah I mean it's it's got parcel skip but majority of it when when all the action and the blood and guts and the sex and all that's on the screen, I'm glued right to it. So I love it.
Starting point is 01:27:07 I mean, how often do you see a mutated Avenger pound in a beautiful blonde girl? Then she made him eggs afterwards. I mean, yeah, awesome. 10, 10 out of 10. That's why I'm a big fan of James Gunn. You could say whatever you want about the guy now, but I feel like he's always one of us, because he started at Tromond. And when I saw Guardians 1 and I saw Lloyd Kaufman in the prison, I marked out.
Starting point is 01:27:41 Like I'm like, oh, shit. Like, because that was like an Easter egg for like the very few that really knew the history. So he was there and I was marking out big time. And even now, James Gunn always finds a way to add, like, put a little bit of trash. And he's like artsy films, big budget studio films. Sure. I mean, look at that final sequence and suicide squad, you know, with PolkaDop Man. and his mom.
Starting point is 01:28:04 That's like straight out of trauma right there. That's like trauma shift left and right. And so, so yeah, so, I mean, Lloyd Kalman all the way. Anyway, so now we're going to jump over to the 2025, which is really the 2023 version of this movie because it sat on the shelf for a couple years. So Toxic Avenger 2025. A horrible toxic accident transforms downtrodden janitor Winston Goose
Starting point is 01:28:29 into a new evolution. of hero, the toxic Avenger. Director writer, Megan Blair, also known for I Don't Feel at Home in this World anymore, which is a pretty okay movie. Yeah, I like that one. Macon Blair confirmed that it's not actually Peter Dinklish under the makeup as
Starting point is 01:28:47 Toxy. It's not Peter. It's a tiny British actress named Louisa Guerrero. She's Portuguese, a complete badass. 110 degrees, 30 pounds of foam makeup, motors all over her face to move the eyebrows and stuff like that. What she did was, and what she did was, and this is why I get
Starting point is 01:29:02 so excited talking about it. Peter performed the whole movie on videotape as Toxy, just himself, but making the choices delivering the line's physical choices, how fast he's running all of it. There's a video version of him just in the white room playing the whole movie. Reisa takes those tapes home, memorizes them, and studies them. She plays teletubbies and umpalumpas. She's like a physical performer. So she's studying his gait and his timing, his pauses, his line delivery. She replicates that on set, and then Peter six months later comes back,
Starting point is 01:29:32 and reinterpreted the voice based on what she did. So she's essentially doing what Robert Donnell Jr. wanted to do with Dr. Doom, except him to him, get the fucking cost to motherfucker. You're getting paid $40 million. Go do your thing. But originally he just wanted a stunt double to do his shit, and he was just a voiceover it. Anyways, I digress. As always, we want to thank you.
Starting point is 01:29:54 Oh, that's the end. I'm getting ahead of myself. All right. That was some good trivia, though, man. I had no idea. All right. So I'll start. I really like this film a lot.
Starting point is 01:30:06 One of the things that was surprising, it wasn't a big studio remake of the original. It was literally just another trauma movie, which I loved. You know, they were not trying to like, the only thing that I didn't like about this movie was a CGI blood, which I guess we'll get into later on.
Starting point is 01:30:21 But other than that, I mean, this was just as schlocky as the original. Not that much, but for the time, it's pretty schlocky. I really enjoyed it, man. I thought, I kept on thinking to myself, what does who, like, does the producer have something on Kevin Bacon and Peter Dinklish for them to be in this movie? Because, but then again, they're having, but then again, they're having a great fucking time. Like, they're just, look that way. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:45 Both of them are hamming it up. And so, so that was, that made the movie more like, like, I enjoyed it more because I saw them having so much fun on screen. It wasn't like they didn't have their bitch face just trying to get through it and cash in a paycheck, you know, which we've seen before in other films. where big stars think they're too big for the for the material here everybody's having a good time um it's one joke after another this is one of those movies that you have to watch again because there's so many easter eggs and there's so many jokes coming at you that you just miss them you know um and and most of them landed for me uh i i didn't think the story was as strong as the original but it was still it was still a fun little story very basic but we don't watch the talk of adventure for the story watch it for like the like the wackiness around it you know like i really
Starting point is 01:31:31 liked the whole thing, the guy with the chicken head that reveal, which we'll get into in spoilers. I thought that was pretty wacky. That whole scene with the band really was just pretty good, because it was building up to that. So yeah, I really liked this movie quite a bit. So what do you guys think about it? Brian, we'll start with you this time. I had fun with it, but I was a little underwhelmed. I think the movie was a little hyped up and it led me to be a little disappointed with some
Starting point is 01:32:01 scenes. But guts, I heard like two years about this scene. Yeah. And then when it happened, I was just kind of like, oh. That's it? That's it? Yeah. No, that's true. It was getting all kinds of praise in the
Starting point is 01:32:17 festival circuits and we're like, oh, it's going to be a great. And then, yeah, if you If you have that in your head, I could see why you would be a little disappointed. What are the thoughts? I thought everybody did a phenomenal job. I agree with you. Everybody looked like they had fun. One of my favorite characters in here was Elijah Wood.
Starting point is 01:32:36 Yeah, he was as P.N. Gwinn, you know, this got away with it. I thought he looked more like a riffraff from Rocky Horror Picture Show. Yeah, that too. I thought he looked like the penguin. Yeah, I got that vibe as well, yeah. The, the CGI did take me out of it because they did a, I think they did a great job with the suit, like with mechanical prosthetics in the face for the facial expressions, and I'm just kind of like,
Starting point is 01:33:10 why did you go cheap on the blood and the gore? You guys should have went on practical effects with it. agree yeah they remind me of watching i was to say remind me of watching rambo part five remember how's that cg i blood all over the place in that movie yes yeah it there was more cgai too i noticed at rambo when he guts that guy and he rolls down the hill right the body's not quite rolling the right way um i thought kevin bacon i thought he did a pretty good job as as the villain and I was a little underwhelmed with Taylor Page. I've seen her in a bunch of things.
Starting point is 01:33:53 I like her as an actress, but I don't think they gave her enough to do. I did like that scene, Pedro, though, with her reaction to chickenhead. Oh, yeah. That was funny, yeah. And, but yeah, I just came out of it a little underwhelmed. You know, that's kind of the drawback of me doing the news
Starting point is 01:34:14 and stuff for social media. Like, I had to keep track. of all this stuff, so there's no surprises. I didn't know that Peter Dinklage was not in the suit, but I still think it worked with the voiceover. It was spot on. Like, if I didn't know, I would have thought he was in the suit, so I thought that worked well.
Starting point is 01:34:35 And, yeah. Okay. A little underwhelmed. Lance, what are your thoughts? Yeah, I, um, yeah, when the movie started and they got, you know, that kind of intro there with the map of the city and the chicken drink of the water. I thought, okay, this is okay. It's kind of cute.
Starting point is 01:34:54 Sort of in the middle for me. I'm reserving judgment at this point. But yeah, this movie definitely made a lot of social commentary as well. And I thought early on it kind of did it the right way, like when they were, like when he was talking to the doctor. And then he was dealing with trying to call the health. Who hasn't dealt with a health insurance company where they're like, you know, speak to associate.
Starting point is 01:35:19 Yeah, press one. Seek to associate. So, yeah, I mean, everybody can relate to that, unfortunately, in these United States, you know, the way things are now. But other than that, yeah, the scene with the workers in the back where every time the doctor sits up important, you could hear all the, all the construction work being done. That was funny. And I thought that that covered it in a good way.
Starting point is 01:35:41 But then you kind of get into some scenes like that, the restaurant, right? The famous taco restaurant. has changed now and it's the that mr meet miss meet controversy and at first i'm like yeah it's making fun of some of those you know those those those those those those pussies if you will pusification of america that are that are that are so angry how dare they change a male character to a female character and they were actually willing to be terrorist in there because of it and at that point they kind of started hit me over the head with that message it was funny at first as a sight gag. But then when he was doing
Starting point is 01:36:15 his diatribe and all that, I'm like, this movie's kind of starting to lose me a little bit. And I thought, okay, so any of the scenes that Dinklage was in, I think he was spot on. I think he was really good, trying to be a good stepdad to this kid, you know, trying to learn the lingo of what the kids
Starting point is 01:36:31 would say in school and all that, and very understanding. Obviously, a good person. I didn't get that Melvin the Mop boy at all from him. He was just like, he was you and me, right? A normal guy trying to do the right thing. That's by the way he has a different name. Yeah, I
Starting point is 01:36:47 didn't know if I liked that, but who cares? You know, that's neither here or there, because this literally was a different story. You know, there was not the fitness jam and all that. I'm going to tell you guys, to me, Kevin Bacon, to me, just I thought he did kind of phone it in,
Starting point is 01:37:03 quite frankly, I mean, because like you could see the Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas special, and he's having a blast in that, right? And he, to me, he was just kind of silly in this one, but that's just more of a personal choice. Yeah, I'm with Brian.
Starting point is 01:37:20 Silly movie. I'm with Brian. Underwhelmed would absolutely be the word of the day. And I'm afraid I also kind of fell to the all to talk about, well, this is too extreme to release. Well, you've got to cut these scenes and move it back. Bullshit. This is like those
Starting point is 01:37:37 old commercials. What's that, Brian? Sorry to cut you off, but it still felt at times that the movie was edited. Yeah. Just the way certain scenes played out. I'm like, there seem to be more, like I'm watching it and the way the scene plays out. I'm like, there seem to be more to this scene than what I just saw.
Starting point is 01:37:57 And that happened a few times in the movie. Yeah, I could definitely see that. You know, will I ever rewatch this movie? Probably not. Whereas the first one, I could watch, you know, three or four times every year like Nez obviously does. but underwhelmed is the word. What do you guys think? Nass, what are your thoughts?
Starting point is 01:38:17 Yeah, it was all right. I mean, I didn't leave the theater. Like, yeah, this, like, change the ingredients of Coke or anything. But I was just like, again, Peter Dinklage, when it was him, I thought it was cool. I did not know that wasn't him in it until, because I see him where we see him actually running down. the road and then when we see Toxie for the first time running I'm like that's that's not him so immediately I went to my I was the only one in the theater watching this nobody else was in there nobody came in for sexy time when I saw uh that's right it was just me in there I sat in the very
Starting point is 01:39:00 back row again and then you didn't cock block anyone this time so not this not this time so I was like all right cool yeah I had to look at it up really fast and found out that it was that it was a young woman that was doing it, which was fine. I thought her portrayal as Toxie, I mean, I'm sure she did all the lines as well. That was awesome. The dubbing of Peter Dinklage,
Starting point is 01:39:23 when him actually doing all the talking, I thought it fit. It was awesome. Kevin Bacon, he does all kinds of crazy movies. So I had no issue with him being in this. Elijah Wood as well. He does crazy movies. Cool. Another movie to crazy. The only ones I was
Starting point is 01:39:39 surprised at was Peter Dinklage, and that little kid out of character, right? Was it named Jeffrey Tremblay, the kid? He's kind of a... Yeah, he's done some stuff too. Up and coming.
Starting point is 01:39:50 He does a lot of serious stuff, you know? Yeah, that's what I was like, well, I mean, he, I'm sure he likes to have fun too, and I'm sure that check was there. Peter Dinklage, I mean, how long was he on the set? He only shot... Not alive. His beginning.
Starting point is 01:40:04 And then the rest of it, he just sat in the booth and recorded all his lines, which was fine. I'm sure that was a big check for him yeah i could do it in between whatever he's doing uh but kevin bacon like i said as well as elijah wood they make all kinds of crazy things so it was cool uh that they popped into this i didn't have no issues with them um i did like the little taco ria scene that was that was cool wasn't as awesome as the original i think that was kind of like one of the only things they kind
Starting point is 01:40:33 of redid the rest of it it was an entirely different story which i was fine with i mean i'm like okay cool. I mean, yeah, that part with the dealing with the insurance, that's what everyone has to deal with. That was probably like the realest part in the whole movie as well as him trying to just be that father figure for his stepson. I mean, I thought that was really cool. I liked that they did that or even the scene when the boy was like, you know, my dad. And like, I'm like, whoa.
Starting point is 01:41:03 I mean, they tried to go a little serious with some of this stuff. It wasn't as off the wall and crazy. like the regular trauma stuff. I mean, it was cool that legendary stepped up and helped them put it out. I thought that was awesome. As well as what's the bloody disgusting and screen box? I thought that was cool. Yeah, that was like 25 different production companies before that were started.
Starting point is 01:41:30 They were all behind it. Ten minutes of credits. I thought that was cool. The thing that I did love, it was the town was still called like, St. Roma ville or something. That was kind of cute. But I did like when they showed the sign,
Starting point is 01:41:46 like the S was kind of sheared off. And the T was all out and the OVille and all that. I thought all that was cool. I thought they really did it right by at least acknowledging
Starting point is 01:42:02 this still is a trauma property, which was cool. Yeah, the CGI that took me out a lot. I mean, there was some practicals in it. But yeah, the CGI blood always, it always gets me. I mean, but they did what they could.
Starting point is 01:42:20 I'm sure the budget was blown on the actors. Oh, yeah, that's true. It was okay. Like you said, I didn't leave the theater like, oh my God, that's like the greatest movie in the world. Will it make my top 10? Probably not. but it was it was decent
Starting point is 01:42:39 I mean would I watch it again of course I would well I buy it of course I will but I just I just wasn't blown away by the whole thing I mean I thought everybody in it was good the gal that played Toxie running around the suit I thought at first I was like when I first saw the images just the pictures I was like that's
Starting point is 01:43:00 Toxy I'm like okay I did like the whole two too they they kept that in and the mop um that was cool i mean i'm if they come out with a figure of course i'll buy it i thought it was cool i got the other toxy figure and uh the the toxic crusader's figures i got those but yeah i just wasn't i wasn't blown away by by what i saw it was it was okay i mean i i didn't wasn't mad that i paid 16 bucks to see it and but yeah i don't think i don't think I think I'll go see it again on the big screen, but I'll definitely watch it once to start
Starting point is 01:43:39 streaming, and of course I'll buy it. But yeah, I wasn't blown away by the whole thing. I mean, I liked what they did. New story, new for this generation. Yeah, they did sit on it for a while, but hey, man, that's a lot of films. And I'm surprised they only sat on it for a couple years because I think something like this, I'm coming to the theater. to the big screen.
Starting point is 01:44:07 I mean, there isn't a lot of this type of wackiness and craziness. But yeah, but in the end, like I said, I didn't leave the theater like super hyped or anything. But, I mean, I enjoyed it. But yeah, it was all right. All right. So now we're going to go with ratings. And then we'll, I don't, I mean, we're going to do the spoiler section. I don't think there's a lot of talk about there that we haven't already covered.
Starting point is 01:44:30 But we'll start with ratings. Lance, you go first. I liked it more than I didn't. So five and a half. Okay. I will go six on ten on this one. Brian? Yeah, I want to give it a six, but right now I'm at a five and a half.
Starting point is 01:44:50 Okay. Well, look at that. You and Lance are green on a rating. Stop the presses on that. That rarely happens. Once a decade. Something. Ness, what about you?
Starting point is 01:45:00 I'll go higher than all you guys. Give it an eight. I mean, I enjoy it. I enjoyed what was on the screen. I mean, when all the violence was going on, of course, I oohed and odd. Right. But it would have probably been higher.
Starting point is 01:45:18 I probably would win a nine if they went to practical effect with all. So when he was swinging the mop and knocking people's jaws off, I mean, I was like, oh, cool, but I was still like, you can clearly see it with CGI. Pretty clearly. Yeah. Yeah. So I was kind of like, oh, okay.
Starting point is 01:45:35 man as i was sitting there watching it i was like okay i'll give it a point for this i'll give it a point for that but i mean but again i think most of the points other than the effects i would give it for the acting i thought they did what they would be that's a good way yeah the acting wasn't too bad on on everybody i feel like i mean i know last things that kevin bacon kind of phoned it in which is fine i mean for this kind of movie but i thought everybody did a pretty good job yeah i mean the the kid the Trimbley kid. I mean, he wasn't in it that much, but when he was on the screen, I thought it was cool, especially Peter
Starting point is 01:46:08 Dicklitz for taking a role like this. And we've seen him in all these, yeah, we've seen them in comedies and everything, but it was a majority of his work was all serious. And for him to take a role like this, I was, I was blown away by that. And him not being the slap,
Starting point is 01:46:25 sticky, goofy, Melvin the Mobboy character, I mean, not taking anything from the masterpiece that he did with that, but, But I thought he did good. I thought he did a really good job when he was on the screen. So I really enjoyed his acting. And Elijah Wood, I mean, I don't want to go into my story of looking into his pretty eyes.
Starting point is 01:46:48 Whatever did you. He was still cool. I thought he was good. I mean, yeah, he looked more like Penguin from Batman Returns in this one. But I liked him, how he's all hunched over in creepy. you're looking. Yeah, I always those weird looking guys.
Starting point is 01:47:07 Yeah, so I was cool with it. That's his niche. They did give you the nod to the blind lady in the in the little taco hut. Yeah, it didn't go where we thought it was going to go, right? No, because in the original one, that
Starting point is 01:47:22 one guy goes, ah, it's the first time a cornerhole me a blind man, bitch. That's right. It was like, he was about to say it in this one, but then they just stopped it. So, I mean, I I get it. Yeah, all the social commentary that was in it.
Starting point is 01:47:36 Did they go overboard? You kind of. But, I mean, it didn't bother me. It didn't take me out of the movie. I mean, I see what they were trying to do. They did pay homage to the original, but they brought us a new story and a little more seriousness to this role, to this toxic Avenger universe.
Starting point is 01:47:58 Because if you watch all the other ones, they're all goofy, stupid, and crazy. This one, of course. course it was stupid and crazy, but with a little more seriousness. So yeah, that's why I'll give an eight for that. And there's really no, there's no spoilers for this, really, right? I mean, I mean, it kind of is what it is. I'll bring something up really quick. So we'll go to spoilers right now. Three, two, one. Okay, we're in spoilers. This is a motherfucking spoiler alert. You've been fucking warned. This is a motherfucking spoiler alert. You've been fucking warned. This is a motherfucking
Starting point is 01:48:32 Spoiler alert. You've been fucking warned. Do you guys think that Kevin Bacon was also in the suit when he turns into whatever creature or do you think that was like a stun double? Because I don't know. It was him, wasn't it? Just makeup? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:48:50 Yeah, because you would think that he would also get to go home, you know, because they could only afford these people for a certain number of dates. I feel like Kevin Bacon is a guy that would put the makeup and suit on. I think so too. It's weird because he just won't full bacon. But here's a thing though. Here's a thing. He won't talk about Friday the 13.
Starting point is 01:49:12 He just won't talk about it like ever. And yet he's making all these other films and he'll talk about these films. And he just doesn't. He's so ashamed or I don't know what the word is, but he just doesn't want to talk about Friday the 13. And I'm like, bro, like look at what you're doing. You know, you're over here like drinking some dude's blood and all kinds of other weird shit. Yeah, so that was interesting. And then, of course, like, one of my first things, like, we've talked about, like, the whole chicken head reveal, you know, where it's like that little baby with the little head and everybody's just tripping out on that.
Starting point is 01:49:47 I thought, I thought the gang got a lot of buildup. Some of the characters kind of let me down in their payoff, the whole gang of thugs and stuff. I like that guy that was always, I was the guy that was always doing flips. That guy kind of cracked me up. And, and, but yeah, so that was a little bit of a letdown because the way he just takes care of him like right away, I was like, oh, that's it. The killer nuts. Yeah. So that's kind of my only spoiler talk.
Starting point is 01:50:13 I mean, I don't know what else you guys got to talk about. Did you guys? Disappointing butt guts was? He didn't even reach his hand up his ass. I know, man. I thought I was going to see his arm go up his ass and rip the guts out. He touched his ass and then the guts were there. And then he fell out.
Starting point is 01:50:31 That was so disappointing, man. So disappointing. I heard about this damn kill scene for two years now and was waiting for it. And then when it happened, I was just kind of like, is that it? Brian, in a violent nature, it wasn't, huh? Oh. No, it was not.
Starting point is 01:50:51 Did you guys just get up and leave or did you stay all the way to the end? Got up and laugh. I think I stayed to the end. Did you see the grill cheese seemed? No. I went down when the credits started rolling. I had to get back to work, unfortunately. I stayed all the way.
Starting point is 01:51:13 I was playing hooky. Sorry, Ness. All the way to the end of the credits. They showed a seat. Somebody was in a hospital bed that was still alive. I think it was Kevin Began's character. I wasn't sure, but then it cut to... Then it cut to...
Starting point is 01:51:33 It was either Kevin Bacon or it was that lady, his assistant or whatever. Oh, yeah, because we didn't see what happened to her after the... Yeah, because Kevin Bacon was pretty dead. He got... He got lost up in that car. Oh, yeah, it couldn't have been him. Well, then it was probably the woman
Starting point is 01:51:51 because somebody was laying in a hospital bed with their face bandaged up and then... That's her. Yeah, that would be her. said something really quick and then it went to Toxy was in his kitchen making grilled cheese. Yeah, it was like he was making, like he was doing a tutorial on how to make cheese. I mean, the scene went on for like ever. And then his son came in. Wish I hadn't left.
Starting point is 01:52:18 And remember he was supposed to do that dance routine or whatever, but then like pushed out and ran off? He was doing that. And while he was like his dad was making grilled cheese. He was in the background dancing, doing all the crazy Michael Jackson moves. Just having fun, probably. Yeah, that it was over. They sat down, they started eating their grilled cheese and drinking milk. And then it said, if I remember right, if this movie makes a billion dollars,
Starting point is 01:52:46 we'll get a toxic Avenger two and then maybe a three. That's not going to happen. It said some other things on the bottom, but it was like, it was really quick on the screen. You said a billion dollars? I don't know. Yeah. How close is. Box office,
Starting point is 01:53:01 2.2 million. Got a little waste to go. How much of the cost to make? It doesn't say, but probably not. Shit, not even Superman or like Marvel was getting a billion nowadays anymore. So,
Starting point is 01:53:15 right. But yeah, that was, I just said, let me just see what's at the end. Yeah. So my other, one of my favorite parts is when he killed that whole bit.
Starting point is 01:53:27 No, I think it was before. before he killed that band, when he got up there and he was singing Motorheads Overkill. Yeah, that was pretty cool. That part was funny.
Starting point is 01:53:37 But yeah, that was all that was at the very, very end. Again, I was the only one in the theater and I wanted to get my $16 worth, so I stayed all the way. I don't blame you. I paid five for my experience, so I didn't feel too bad leaving.
Starting point is 01:53:52 If it was at a center mark, it would have been $5 because Tuesday's cheap night. But at Galaxy, I guess they don't have a cheap night because it's $16 and another $16 for a drinking popcorn. As always, we want to thank you guys for a list to another episode of The Horror Returns. We'd love to hear your feedback and ideas. You can always reach us at thehorrorreturns.com. Don't forget to enter the T-shirt contest.
Starting point is 01:54:18 Leave us an Apple iTunes review. And next week, Brian, help me out, dude. I'm always losing it at this part with my notes. I know it's in the conjuring universe. Yeah, the conjuring last rites, also 1991's The Haunted. So until next time and until the horror returns again, everybody, good night. Night.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.