The Horror Returns - THR - Ep. #540: Hell Night (1981) commentary

Episode Date: October 8, 2026

We start the month off with a commentary on a horror classic. The podcast spotlight shines on Pam and Teri, Drunk and Scary. Feedback will return next week. Thanks for listening!  

Regings victims, for those of you who delight and dread, who fantasize about fear, who glorify gore, welcome. You have found the place where the horror returns. Listeners beware. This podcast contains major plot spoilers. and the foulest of language. Join us in celebrating the old and the new, the best, and the worst in horror. Welcome back, everyone, to The Horror Returns.

Tonight we got Lance, Brian, and Ness is in the house. What's going on, guys? What's up? I'm good, man, just hanging out. commentary for hell night was this your idea and is did you give brian this idea or what i no i just heard about it when you guys mentioned it the last time you said there was some trivia i couldn't find it something about a couple of guys getting a bunch of money or what there's two actors in it um what the hell is that guy's name um he was in

the 13th part for final chapter and the other guy in this movie the other guy. Oh, I don't know his name. They, um, they,

I guess you should pull it up. Yeah, I'm looking. Vincent, Van Patton, Peter Barton. Yeah, Peter Barton and, uh, Kevin Brophy. No, yeah, Kevin, From what I understood, there was some guy.

He, I think he died of cancer or something. And they, in his will, he was like, he wanted to give his money to these two actors. Because I guess somebody found them and said, hey, this guy left you, I don't know, money or whatever. And they're like, what? They said they didn't even know him. But it came out to find out that he was a fan of theirs. Oh, that shit. Peter Barton, he was in Powers of Matthew Star and some other things,

movies and all that. And the other guy, he was actor too, popped up in this, popped up in that. But he liked their acting. And he just said, I want to leave everything to them. So they got, I assume it was just money. I don't think it was like property or anything. but unless, I don't know, I could be wrong. I heard this story a while ago.

But they were like, yeah. He goes, he gave us all his his leftover earnings or whatever, and they were just kind of like, it was weird, but they took that check. So, but I don't know, that was crazy when I first heard that. But hell night.

That was legit. It was verified. I said that, I heard Peter. Barton talk about it on a podcast and then I saw some I don't know some TV show and they were talking about it but this

1981 I saw this in the theater so I saw it back in the day you did huh did you no I don't think Brian did you see at the theater no I've only seen this once you know anything about it

yeah I don't know. I think I've seen it, guys, but I'm not, I can't swear that I've seen it before, actually. Well, this is streaming on Prime. So if you guys want to cue it up and check it out with us. But for what it says here on Prime, four college pledges are forced to spend the night in a deserted old mansion, where they are stocked by the monstrous survivor of a family massacre years earlier. Pretty specific. That's what Prime says. Okay. IMDB for college fraternity and sorority pledges spend the night in a deserted old mansion as part of a hazing ritual during hell night,

where they are stalked by the only survivor of a family massacre from the mansion's soared past. This star was directed by... What a hell? I lost it all. Tom Desimon. I think that's just said. Written by Randy Fieldman, and this stars the legendary.

Linda Blair, Vincent Van Patten, Peter Barton, Kevin Brofrey, Jenny Newman, Suki, Goodwin, Jeremy,

Stuart Vent, and a bunch of other people in this. But, yeah, like I said, I saw this in the theater when it came out.

I remember watching the Siskel and Eberts at the movies, and they were reviewing this. I don't remember what they gave it, but they usually don't like horror movies. Thumbs down. They tore apart Friday, 13th, when that came out. I heard about that. Which was a year before this one came out.

But at the time, I was seeing whatever was playing at the Parkway Theater, which was right around the corner from my house. And we all knew Linda Blair, mainly for Exorcists and everything else. But for those of you guys that. and gals that have met her, she is a sweetheart. She'll talk to you. She'll answer your questions.

I talked to her about Mike. We met her at, I don't know, some nightmare in Riverside or whatever that little con was. He got his Exorcist Blu-ray sign. I was just there with him and I was talking to her. I talked to her about this. She goes, that's cool, man.

I'm glad you saw it. Because I told her I saw it in the theater. She was like, wow, how old are you? That's kind of what I was thinking. I said, I was 10 years old when I saw it. She was like, wow, your parents let you see it. I said, they didn't know I went and seen it. That theater didn't ask, our age, or didn't care.

As long as we handed them money, they let us in. Yeah, that's how it was in the day. The good old days. I'd forgotten your old just like I am, Naz. Yeah, we're the old timers. Old heads. Yep. All right.

Before we jump in, do you want to do a cool of the week? Oh, we started a 31st,000. Days of Horror. Yeah. We're recording this on October 1st, so first episode is up, go listen to it. I don't know when you guys are going to hear this, but probably be a few episodes in by then.

But yeah, Brian and I, he's, he came back, of course. He has to come back. And Julie as well, and Mike, and of course, the Zisu, Theo, he came in and we recorded an episode. It's a new movie. It's not an old movie, because he

doesn't watch these old horror movies. like we do. So it's a newer, a new, a pretty brand new film, still in the theaters now. But when that episode comes out, you guys can listen to it. But that's why cool the week.

All right. What you got, Brian? Supernatural? Yeah, we are on halfway through season eight now. All right. Probably be on season nine

by next week. And I also caught the first three episodes. of American horror story 13. I don't know where the story's going. Okay. It is a cameo fest of past people.

They're all gathering for something. The number 13 is very prevalent in this show. Don't know what it's building to, but it is a little interesting so far. All right. So you're kind of hooked a little bit? Yeah, because I want to see what the 13, because it's mentioned throughout each episode. And like I said, all the past villains are gathering, the witches are gathering. What's his name? Evan Peters.

All the characters he plays are in one room together. So it's building to something. And I'm curious to see what it is. Is it the 13th season? Yeah. Okay. That makes sense. Yeah, I'm going to watch it.

The only season I didn't watch, I think, was we were talking about it earlier, New York. Yeah. I kind of tapped out like you did. They're quick because for some reason there are only 30 minutes this season. episodes so they go by real quick that's probably a good thing yeah all right so you could live the week is supernatural or a hs i'll go a hs nice all right yeah well you guys knew i met up with philip at the iron maiden concert right but not by design for real i didn't know that yeah yeah he was he was sitting in the same section me and my brother were in but concert you guys you guys didn't know

not really i mean we both we both knew we were going um a couple months back i think somebody mentioned it on the podcast and he said oh i'm going to where was this we didn't know we're in the same section alamodome san antonio oh okay yeah opening act the first opening act nez was anthrax have you ever seen they were first yeah they were first they were fucking badass They rocked, man Did Megadeth play too? Yeah, but man, Mustang's voice is shot, unfortunately. Well, this is the last go-around for what I'm hearing.

Mm-hmm. How many openers was just Anthrax and Megadeth? Yeah, it was those two. And then, yeah, Iron Maiden did probably about a two and a half hour set, I would say. They did a lot of the epics. You know, like Rhyman the Ancient Mariner and Phantom of the Opera. Like the longer songs, you know. on the stage now, right?

Yes. Yeah, they don't do the inflatable Eddie anymore. They don't have Eddie. He didn't, he doesn't come out, come walking out. Well, I don't know how they did it. They had like two dudes that came out in Eddie Costs or three of them. There were three different times, but they were like two and a half times taller than the people, but they were like walking regular.

So I can't figure out how they did that. Like maybe it was stilts and tall guys or I'd like to know how they did that. I hope they do a documentary about the tour or something. Because I liked it. They always did that. They worked in Eddie, depending on what song it was. He'd come out. Because the first time I saw him was somewhere in time.

Yes. Back in 87, I think, when that album came out. Later 80s, yeah. Yeah, and he came stilting out. And Big John Eddie on stage at the end for the encore. But I saw videos and there's that big screen behind him. It looks cool. But closest he's coming to me is L.A.

And I'm not sure if that happened yet. tickets are expensive. I want to be on the floor. I don't want to be in a seat, so. Oh, yeah. Well, we didn't pay too much, but we were all kind of in nosebleed, you know. But, I mean, there wasn't a bad seat in the house. The only problem is, I don't really like stadium shows

because the sound quality is not the same as an arena, you know? Anthrax is my favorite band in the world. Dude, they were fucking badass. Yeah, I love them. I see them whenever they come close. And actually, Charlie's, the drummer. I had him on

an episode of Magnus podcast a few years ago. Oh, you did? I do remember that. Yeah, he was at him and Scott Ian, we're at Texas Frightmare. And he gave me a few minutes, so that was that's when my show peaked when Charlie came out.

Oh, bet. Everything else is downhill from there, but I didn't care. He's my favorite drummer of all time with my favorite band. So, but yeah, I thought that was cool. I want to go to that show in L.A. It's just too pricey. Yeah, well,

maybe they'll come back around and do and do less expensive show. Probably not, though, huh? These days. I paid $20 when I saw Iron Maiden. Yeah. Yeah. Now it's probably 200 at least, right? No, it's probably more. For the nosebleeds. Yeah,

well, that's what I paid. Well, I think I paid like 160 or something. Was there seats? Was there chairs on the floor or was it open? It was open. Standing room only? Yeah, there were mosh pits for anthrax. Yeah, you missed out. I guess we should have planned

this better, Brian. I could have got everybody there. All right, well, before we get in the movie, I think we got one shout out to, let's see, we got a podcast spotlight. What a name.

Pam and Terry, drunk and scary. Grab a drink, take a shot and pull up a chair. Philip should have been here this week. We're diving into some horror favorites, watch the movie with us, learn some trivia, and enjoy drunken commentary along the way. I don't know.

We've done that on the show before, and it usually doesn't end well, does it, Brian? I mean, it gets interesting. Yeah, it does. All right. Well, give them a lesson if you like Drunken Talk. In the meantime, we've got a movie to watch. So where do you guys want to start? I think I'm at one second, but I can go back.

It doesn't start like with a studio name. That's interesting. Yeah, I'm right at zero zero. You guys there? Well, this is on Prime, the one I'm watching. I don't know if it's the same one elsewhere. My microphone was muted. I may step.

I'm going to step out whenever they're ready to leave. so but yeah we got you i'll watch what i can so whenever you guys are ready all right you're ready brian all right you guys at zero zero yep all right i'll do the count down i'm trying to get a little volume here all right three two oh hold on minimize my screen all right all right we're zero zero three two one okay good old college days. Oh, yeah. Can y'all hear that as the volume? Volume okay?

I don't hear anything. I can hear mine, but we've got a bunch of people partying. Yeah, Blair. I'll change my microphone here to capture everything. Hell night. The good old, probably 70s, maybe 80 when they filmed this. 81. Brian always looks at.

Well, that's when it came out, but when did they Yeah, true. This is your early 80s, late 70s style. The feathered hair. All the guys have long hair, power in the brew. College. I didn't ever went to college. Was it like this when you went to college, Lance?

Yeah, kind of, because I went to my freshman year. I didn't have the grades to get into UT, so I did Southwest Texas State University. It's called Texas State now. And it was known as the party school in Texas. So it was pretty crazy. I lived in a dorm that freshman year. Man, I'll never live in a dorm again. There's like no privacy at a shared bathroom and people throwing up in the bathroom and all kinds of shit.

Well, these guys are partying, screaming, making out, riding around our motorcycles over a route of bonfire. What time are you going to say? I'm at 140 now. I got one was just part in written by Randolph Feldman toilet paper Brian I got 154 55 56 I'm right with you Lance produced by Irwin Yablans and Bruce Cohn Curtis well there's the urban cowgirl you see her yeah how come they're not all topless man they shouldn't they be topless directed by Tom De Svobobovov.

Well, it's still early in the party, but it's, uh, everyone going crazy. These are the pull, these are the pull tab beers. Yeah, I remember stepping on some on the beach before. We always use the little pole tabs for, um, put them on our fishing poles. I'm going to go fishing with my dad. I had a, I had a friend in college that we went to the Renaissance festival every year. He made a, he made a full suit of armor out of, Miller Light full tabs.

Here we go. When he went to the Renaissance Festival, we called him the Miller Light Night. So this guy, he's the chairman, the president of the fraternity, what did you say? The guy with the purple on? Yeah, he is

Peter, Kevin Brophy. Okay. Young, young, Linda Blair. And I believe that's Is that Jenny Newman? I think that's her name. Brian, do you think Linda Blair looks like she was old enough to be in college in this? I don't know. I'm confused on everybody's age because there's some women that look like they're way too old to even be here.

It looks that way. She looks like she's college-aged. Yeah? But, I mean, when you go to a costume party, man, yeah, you want to party and have fun, but sure. Big old ball gown on. There's Robin Hood. I like him.

Vincent Van Patton, he's badass. Yeah, he's the main guy, right? He's riding the bull. Schlitz malt liquor. Mean beer, boys and girls. Stay away from it. Oh, man. Dumping in his stined.

Yeah, his. Peter, Bob. Martin, he's Jeff, he's back there. And this chick, she's just partying away. I think that's Denise. Yeah? She's like an old time. Like 40s dressed up.

It's easy on the eyes. Linda Blair beautiful. I love her, but... Oh, yeah. It's hard to run for your life in a ball gown. Oh, old school. A little mini kigs. Oh, yeah, the pony cags, I think they called them, right? See, these are all rich kids.

They didn't care. Just throw that thing right through the window. Yeah, mommy and daddy will pay for it, right, Brian? I've been to parties like this, like high school and college parties. I didn't go to college, but I've been to their parties. That's the most important part. You can skip the classes as long as you get to the parties, right? I guess.

But so these are the fraternity and the pledges as well as sorority. Don't ask me. Don't ask me what fraternity or what sorority. Were you in a fraternity, Lance? Oh, man, I tried it. I didn't fit in very well, to say the least. That didn't put you through hell night? Well, and my first experience with him, I met a guy in class, and he said, well, I'm in a fraternity.

We have a lot of fun. Why don't you pledge, right? So they had like this thing called, they called it the Pledge Party. And they kept giving me drinks. And I mean, I'm not blaming anybody. I was drinking them, right? We were playing quarters. You know, if you guys ever played quarters,

where the quarters got to land at the drink and you make somebody drink it? Uh-oh. We got a gun. Next thing I knew, Nez, I woke up in an amp pile. Naked? No, I wasn't naked, but I was in an amp pile, dude, because I had been in the dude's apartment and I threw up all over. his couch.

I don't blame him. Good old days. Yeah, but I didn't like it, man. They would take us out of the woods and yell at us and shit. And I said, fuck this. Nah, not for me. Was this Garth Manor? Is that where they went into? This always reminded me of that mansion in the first

Goolies movie. Has to seen it. Oh, that's right. Alpha Sigma Row. The worst Goolies movie in the franchise. The first one was hell of good. Yeah, you were the only one that liked it, I think, man. I like the first two.

The third one I haven't seen in a college one. Oh, that's the funnest one. I haven't seen it. Just a little tipsy. I hope you didn't bring any. What's the first one, Naz? Ten on ten? Goolies?

Yeah, I love that movie. Jesus, Brian, what's happening, man? The blonde chick has a searcher before we leave. The blonde chick have an accent. I think so. I guess she's a transfer student. Can you all hear the volume at all? Yeah.

All right. For Raymond and Lillian Garth. Therefore, children. Now, Lillian Garth was a hopeless civil. About the only thing she was good for was childbearing. So Peter was telling the story of the manner. Raymond was a boy. A mongloid boy, they called Morse.

A mongoloid boy, huh? Definitely not as PC as movies are now, is it? The baby girl, Suzanne. She was so hideously deformed that it was... So is Linda Blair supposed to be like Little Red Riding Hood or something? No idea. No idea. No idea.

She used to drag herself around the house with a health for one... Good. Now, the guards were very fanatical about their privacy. They didn't want to have to be dependent on anyone else, so they isolated themselves up to you. he's telling the whole story there's no gas no electricity and no phone

so again they tried to have a child and within the year the guards added mark but unfortunately it soon became apparent that poor little Margaret could neither hear nor speak nor see

but good old Ray was determined and he decided to have one last goal he ought to do those like haunted haunted tours they do in the different cities and stuff you ever taking on of those? I've done

like a haunted mine thing. Yeah. You went down into the mine? Yeah. Wasn't haunted, but it was scary going down. Did you have a... I was just thinking it was getting cave in. Yeah, I can imagine.

Did you have a guide like that? Like this dude, this talking, talking to... Yeah, the way he was telling the stories about the mind. It was in Nevada. Brian, do they have any ghost in Alaska? I know there's a haunted hotel downtown. That's where you are?

Anchorage? Yeah. Yeah, I think every town has something, right? I think every town has something, right? Who is forced to witness the slaughter of his entire. I've never went to the hotel. I don't know. I mess with that kind of stuff.

Stay far away, huh? Yeah. I want to open no doors. Yeah. When I first saw this, I thought everybody was going to be partying in this place. I didn't know they were just going to leave the four of them. Oh, what do they tell them to hit the road here in a minute or what? Yeah.

It's everyone just their partying. Yeah, that's kind of weird. Well, luckily, they found a mansion that, that nobody was in. Yeah, what are the chances, right? Yeah. Well, I'm sure there was no surveillance cameras. It's a different time, boys and girls.

Yep. Have we snuck into things like this before? Of course we have. That was way back in the day. The older, we were just trying to be cool for the older kids. Of course. And we'd go in. The music lets you know in serious.

Speaking of allergies, I know mine would be going off in here. All the dust and everything in there. All kinds of layers of dead skin, dead skin cells. You four may sleep anywhere you want in a house. Well, somebody was in there. All the lights or the cameras are lit. Yeah. Are they sure they should be going in here?

That shouldn't be too hard. So you said they left the rest of the party outside. It just said, get out of here? what? Well, it was just for those four. I assume those two guys were pledges and... Ah, okay. I think these two other gals were

sorority pledges. Now I get it. Okay. That makes sense. That does make sense. Everyone's leaving now. And they got to lock the gate and they'll be back when the sun comes up. Like that Scooby-Doo episode where they had

to spend 24 hours in a haunted house or something? Or was I think there's the Flintstones, wasn't it? I can't remember. Now, the only way out of Garth Manor is to shoot your way out. I can just climb that thing. You got to shoot your way out. Climb the wall.

Don't go over the fence or the gate. Uh-huh. Spikes and everything on the top. About six hours. Six hours. That doesn't seem very long. No. That's almost a whole work shift.

Yeah, I thought they were going to have to stay like 24 hours or something. No, that's probably past midnight. We'll be back at 6. Oh, yeah, till dawn then, basically, right? Look at all these rich kids, badass Corvette. Corvette. I know a guy like that. But at least he was cool.

I mean, that was the only Corvette I have ever driven. Yeah, Phil said he had an idea for a business. I think it makes sense. He said we should take like those old body styles and make EVs. What do you think? People would buy them. You have money to do all this? No, but it's just an idea.

Just a crazy idea. Got to get some backers. Hit Elon to back me, right? Yeah. What else was this guy in? I know I've seen him in a ton of things. What about Robin Hood? Yeah.

What's his name? Vincent Van Patten. Is this Dick Man Patton's son? I was thinking... Sounds familiar. He's a son... Yes, son of Dick Man Patton. There you go. He's getting as cold as a house pecker in the second out here.

What's his name? Mr. Bradford. It is enough. That's right. Those you old school, as they remember that one. What did he say? It's cold as a pecker out here? Yeah.

I don't know how many peckers are cold, but... Well, he's still acting. He's got some things on the horizon. Yeah? This one? Vincent. Yeah. Vincent.

He's still doing his thing. All right. The Digman Patton's underground long since, right? Oh, rock and roll high school. That's what I remember him from. No shit. He was in that. He was the one trying to get with, um...

What's her name? P.J. Souls. Someone's yelling at me. Her name. Her name in Rockville High School. Okay. I met her that one year when I went to Texas Fratman. Oh, yeah.

At a Rock Monroe High School screening. That was a blast, huh? Yeah. Okay. I remember him as $6 million man and Wonder Woman as well. What? He was in that? Like one episode. Kind of a guest

guest role, huh? Well, his dad was a TV dad, so I'm sure to help him get in all this stuff. Nepo, baby. Yeah. So did these guys, did they know each other? Or is this the first time meeting each other now?

They're just going to hang out. Brian, can you explain? It's called for the bar. I think they just met this night. This hell night. Well, we can see. that Linda Blair is the little goody-goody girl. She's hanging out with, what's his name?

Jeff, Peter Barton. And the other girl ran off with... What's his nuts? With Seth, Vincent Van Patten. And they're the partiers and she's ready to party and get down because they ran up into the room. Yeah. Yeah, see, she didn't even know him. Yeah, see, I want to say she's pretty.

pretty, but I want to make sure she's of age in this before I say that. Well, you do the math. She was born in 59, and let's just say this is 80. All right, there you go. 79. She's 20, I would say. Oh, yeah, fair game. Fair game.

2021, maybe. Well, math is no good. Close enough, right, Brian? Yeah. And the old is she now? That's what I don't do with her. Yeah, I'm not doing the math.

Linda Blair. She is... She is... 67. Okay. Not too old, right? No. She's still out there doing it.

Oh, yeah. Speaking of Iron Maideness, Bruce Dickinson, he's 68. that dude's fucking yote dude is jacked the voice still got the voice oh hell yeah but he's uh i did i did i kind of went down the rabbit hole i knew he'd

been a commercial pilot for a while but did did you know he was almost a professional level fencer yeah he's done all guys that's how he stays in shape he's a pilot he uh piloted uh flight six six six

they're big iron maiden plane they had right i don't know if they still have it they had it you see this guy's heart underwear, Valentine's underwear? She's a pussy chick. I don't know that little stashes. And she's got an accent.

He's got garter belts. Right. Good times in the 80s. He should be wearing that t-shirt. You guys remember that t-shirt said free mustache rides or something like that? Well, he just took his mustache off. He did he? Okay.

I don't know. That accent would get me. I turn around. He is a surfer. Yeah, a surfer dude. He grew up in California. Mm-hmm. He's got that surfer body.

See, if I was like that, we'd run around a no shirt all the time. Would you? Hell, if I was cut like that, like that. Hell yeah. Dead winter snowing, no shirt. Brian, you hear this? All the ladies could see what they can't have. You don't want to see it now

But I'm calling it bullshit Eerie music playing I have this Subtitle song All right There is Peter

Kevin Brophy His girlfriend I don't know What her name is And I think he had That little nerdy sidekick guy Posted up somewhere else Oh no there he is

Okay Scott Is his name Jimmy Stewervent I think that's his name His real name Jimmy Stewart vent huh Looks like he was in Quincy

You guys remember that show Yeah Medical Examiner right Yeah with Jack Klugman What was his name In the odd couple All right

Um You guys go on up The North side And he's up Oscar No Oscar was the other one Right Oh

I was said Oscar Goldman Yeah, Oscar Madison. Oscar Madison. Okay, there you go. You Quincy fans out there. What are we doing here anyway? Hard to believe they can make a show about a medical examiner and make it interesting. Well, he was a medical examiner and we'll solve them cases and getting chicks in between. Getting chicks.

Different times in the 70s. Okay, I don't remember that part of it, but. In the intro, man, in the intro, he's like, got some chicken bikini on his boat. Good old 70s. Well, there's no party going on with them. Where are we at? Now I'm having technical difficulties.

I'm at 20 minutes and 55, 56, 7 seconds. Uh-oh. Breaking out the hooch. is that is what what is he drinking is that like bourbon or what like vodka oh i'm sorry if you guys are vodka drinkers out there i'm not the one nah go for go for some belvedere belvedere yeah just give me a beer it doesn't taste like rubbing alcohol brain oh it's actually kind of smooth yeah i tell a story about my brother derrick but i won't embarrass him wait just tell the story about somebody random that's not your brother

we're listening Brian I don't know if I can tell it so we can take it out and edit out they didn't even wash these cups out they just got them off the shelf and what did they alcohol alcohol will kill anything in there were they like dirty with dust in them and shit or what probably dead spiders and who knows probably the Alperardie there.

Yeah, it probably tastes like the cup. The cups were already there. Well, look, they didn't bring those in. Right, right. I guess. Well, somebody had that Stein earlier, remember? Well, that was at the party. Okay.

Filling it up with the slits. Malt liquor. Okay, this is more of like a, I see what you're talking about. This is more of like a medieval cup type thing, right? Yeah. I think it's the bell. What are they called? Goblets.

Yeah. Goblet. Well, he picked the nice girl because his other buddy got the other girl upstairs and she's pretty much naked already. Yeah. Here they are. So is there six people in total?

I lost count. Jeff Peter and I can't know what he said. Her name was. They're outside and basically they're gearing up to scare. Marty, Seth, Jeff, and I think you may. Oh, okay. They're in the house.

They're pulling a prank on them, right? Yeah. Because we're what? 23 minutes in and no horror yet? Horror? Not yet. This is kind of like watching a cartoon, isn't it? Like a Scooby.

I was going to say, this has been a horror. Yeah, I guess you'd have to say they're asking. The horror's upstairs. Of course you've got to wear something to show off the gold. Well, you know, I would have been disappointed if she hadn't. She's of age. Uh-oh, they heard something. Here we go.

That was a nice scream. Yeah. Oh. It'd be funny if the goolies came out. Here comes, Seth. What the hell is that? Hey, dude, let's party. Look at her.

Yeah, she's ready to go. Somebody's trying to mind fuck us. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Oh, I heard something upstairs. This guy looks like Johnny from Karate Kid. Yeah, I always got him and William Zabka. Oh, the greatest American hero?

They could be brothers. No. Oh. William Zabka's Johnny from Karate Kid. Oh, okay. I'm thinking of someone. William Cad is who I'm thinking of. Yeah.

He was in Carrie. Okay Uh-oh See they got this thing all wired up for sound That's cheesy Like a soundboard Like the soundboard that Brian is going to get Every time I miss a movie

He's gonna push the button See they found the speakers I know it's coming They found the speakers Because if that thing scrapes again I'm gonna shoot it again Oh now they're gonna think Whatever happens is just them fucking with them aren't they

It's connected with screws in the back I'll try to do with my nail Just pull it Pull the wire Right Pull the whole thing This was before Wi-Fi wasn't it

Bluetooth Way before all that What isn't it work Oh they must have pulled the wire I must have found it Like how long are these cords Oh Lord Well you gotta have a little nerd

Sidekick That's probably the techie Yes Yes Weird science Look at these big giant things I have Now you can probably do all this with your phone Oh I'm sure you can't

Yeah with Bluetooth right You don't even have to be close to it May don't give me a problem You'll get your kicks later You'll get your kicks later What is that supposed to mean? May Okay she is Jenny

Denise must be the Okay Little foreign girl Oh he's a pirate Because he's got that parrot on his shoulder. Oh, Lord. Uh-oh.

He told May to go see where they're at. She's being a peeping tongue. Well, nothing's happening in that room. You've got to climb up before you want to see something. Not much going on. Uh-oh. There's an owl.

It's a messenger. Is that a real one? You know, something bad's about to happen. Was that a C-G-I-A-A-R-A? owl or a real one? No CGI then. It was a real owl. Uh-oh.

What is she supposed to be a cavewoman? Oh. Yeah. Bam, uh, pebbles. Something jumped out and scared her. Ah! Some dirty hands. Ooh.

Yeah. Came out of a hole and grabbed her. Ah. Your nails are probably breaking. She's raking them down on the side of this brick wall or rock wall. Oh. Uh-oh. Got pebbles.

Like, no one hears all this? Well, no, they think it's the guy's pranking them now, right? Uh-oh. Ah. Some caveman. Yeah. The cleaver. Ooh.

That was... Was that cut away that quick for you guys, too? Or am I watching, like, an edited version? No. That's... Oh, man. That's weak. I didn't even see no blood.

I assume he'd cut her head on. I don't remember this movie, but... To be cut her head off. Maybe we'll see her disembodied head later or something. They sure have a lot of candles. No. He's doing a naz. He's running around with his shirt off the whole time.

With his tidy witties. He looked at his shorts or his boxers. Are those hearts on his boxers or strawberries or what? Yeah, hearts. No, that's the thing in movies. Somebody would always have like heart boxes on. well she'd be like uh what's his name is stone dage stone dage he had the ox 45 uh boxers i would wear those hell yeah i would run around in just those no shirt or yep don't be a worm man oh jeff is that you suspenseful music

you know what that means Did you ever pick up the Blu-ray No I was watching the stodage last night On Prime right now And I went on Amazon They're not selling it there So I assume I got to go to

Whoever's putting it out and get it Okay guys You can't get out You got to shoot your way out That's right She's a ghost Coming down the stairs Fake or not

I mean, good effect for some little college guys. No kidding. Looks like a ghost of whoever owns the manner. There's no urgency with her. Guys, I'm scared. There's anything you grab as a weapon. Well, it'll go right through it. Throw that cup, that goblet in him.

Drink it first, then throw it. Ah, she goes crashing through the door. See, watching Supernatural, I'm prepared. That's right. That's right. You've seen it all by now. Uh-oh. There's a ghost. Wow, that sounds very interesting. You know, I like to stay down here. This guy is still in his boxers.

Yeah. Yeah, something tells me he's going to be for the whole movie. Is that girl upstairs? My body. I wouldn't go back in there after I saw that. I'd have been out. That little weasel, Scott. Okay.

And I turned around and there was like the ghost around. Oh. So you're going to find the projector or what? Who's this? Is this some of all those guys? Jeff and Peter. I'm going to start phase two. Physical terror.

Physical terror. I think you enjoy this a little bit. This guy reminds me of like one of the nerds in Revenge of the Nerds, team end up with one of the bullies in Revenge of the Nerds. Well, he's trying to be cool with them. He didn't want to get beat up. Yeah, that's true. It is underwear pulled over his head.

They always need a smart guy in it. Yeah, the tech guy, right? They always can't be good-looking and smart. Right. Have you ever tried to climb one of those kind of rope ladders? Probably a switch or something. No, and I don't. You did, Brian?

Yeah. It was hard. How'd you do? Did you make it? Yeah, it took me a minute. Yeah, young me, yeah. Now, nope. Something was chasing me.

It's going to get me. Oh, you found the controls. Well, not just leave it open. It looks hella thin. You could have just pulled that thing open. Yeah, it looks like paper. Yeah. Peter

Scott Well then it should be easy You guys know it's fake Yeah Just party Drink from your goblets Yeah finish that bottle See where the night goes

This totally looks like that house and Goulies I think it maybe it is Do you think? I don't know It looks like it That should have been the trivia that we that we looked up right

how this fool get on the roof did he scale up the side of the wall or do you have a ladder in the back wiring it up the scary dummy yeah here's something yeah I'm really curious if that's the same house I think it is if not it's very similar uh oh

who's there just face that direction If you're hearing all these sounds, suspenseful music playing. You're wiring up a dummy. It looks like fishing wire or something. It is. Okay, slow camera roll in the darkness. Yes, just dark.

I thought I lost my picture there for a minute. Someone's peeking around. Should have a flashlight. And where's all this light coming from? I don't know, but there's a lot of it. That's that one. Even the tree behind him is backlit. There should be enough to see.

Uh-oh. This is a dumb parrot. And he's on the roof, too. It's a long fall if you fall off. It kind of looks like, where's Waldo with that shirt? That's his scarf or something. Okay. Uh-oh.

You don't see nothing. Bullshit, Peter. That's to get his head chopped off, isn't he? Ah! Start punching. Oh, there we go. Grabbed it by his neck and spun his head all the way around. Well, they said and cut away from it.

Yeah. It's a little better, a little better kill than the first one. All right. I know you guys aren't going to sleep in that. Dirty, dusty old bed. Well, apparently the other two didn't care. They were naked. No, no, they weren't.

They weren't picky. He's in there working it. This place looks like... Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Get the skeleton. What was that movie? That old black and white movie, guys. You remember with the...

House on Haunted Hill. Remember that? Oh, yeah. That's kind of what this is, isn't it? Very similar. Well, scary back in those days. When that skeleton slowly comes up. I think so naive.

That remake was awesome. You like that one, huh? Yeah. Oh, see, this is old school. Two beds. One for mom and the other one for dad. Like Desi Annes and Lucille Ball. Yes.

I slept on separate beds. We didn't actually see a full bed until Brady Bunch, I think. Really? Yeah, Dick Van Dyke. Did Dick Van Dyke show? It was the same way, right? Yeah, they had two beds. Yeah.

We never saw the Cleaver's bedroom. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that was probably an S&M dungeon. Uh-oh. He thought he was going to get some. She's going, I'm going to sleep now. Might as well.

Come on, man. He's like, man. Yeah. His dick went, wah, wah, wah. These two are resting it off. Ready for round two. I don't know if I could sleep in this whole bed.

I mean, if they're only there six hours, do you really need to sleep? I don't know. I'm running around the mountain. I'll be running around the mansion. Uh-oh. She hears something. Eerie music. Either she never took that off or put it back on when she was done.

They're all about convenience. What would you take a morning afternoon? after pill or what? I don't think they had them, though. She took a pull from her little flask. See, she came prepared. She had drugs and booze. Oh, so that was probably like a...

Oh, what was that drug they used to take, guys? Quailudes, right? Was that a quailude? Like a wolf of Wall Street? Yes, exactly. Wake him up if you're going to start hearing things. I want to know who lit all these candles before they got in there.

She got the Carter belts on. Yeah, she's going all out. See, she put everything back on. Right. Or unless he was too faded and couldn't close the deal. Whiskey Dick. I don't know, man. That's a lot to put back on.

Unless she was hardcore. Sorry to get graphic. Hey, that's an explicit podcast. say whatever we want. We got that letter. It's going to burn the house. It comes with that. Right.

Uh-oh. Whiskey dick. It happens. We weren't all stallions. Right. I thought Desmond's going to say, it happens. Not to me. Not to me.

But it happens. Oh, it never happened to me, but it did happen. I've heard stories Flip flopping, huh? See, I never drank to that point. Right? You're a smart man. To where I don't know what's going on. Uh-oh.

Don't go exploring if you're hearing strange things. I love how she just got finished getting it in and her hair is perfect. Oh, yeah. He definitely had whiskey dick. Makeup ain't even smeared. She... Look at her. She probably looked at all the drawers trying to find a vibrator.

Something? Uh-oh. There'd be so much dust all over everything. Yeah, it's almost like somebody came in and cleaned everything up and put a bunch of candles out before they got there. Oh, come on. Something happened. I got to go. Ah!

Old snake in the drawer. Well, if her guy can't get it up, I mean Ah What the hell was that? I don't think she can see it. Hey, where quailudes? She said these quailudes are murder on my skin. Now, who is this?

Who is this guy with the parrot? This is Peter. No, the parrot guy got his head turned all the way around. Oh, that's right. He was on the roof. I'm not keeping up with a body count here, Brian. This is Peter. That's God's dead, bro.

This is, yeah, this is Peter. There's that ladder that Brian climbed. All right, gang, I got a jet, so you guys finish it out. Yeah, you guys finish it out. I love this movie. Check it out. All right, Ness. Those of you haven't seen this, check it out.

You want to give it a rating or two other? I love this movie. This is a tent. I love it. Brian, what's going on? You got to see the climax. All right, gang, I got a jet. See you.

Brian, with you up later. He made it up the ladder. Yeah, which is more than I think I could do at this point in my life, Brian. Yeah, I'm not climbing any ladders and any ropes at my age. So I'm real confused on who's who. I hate to admit. Is this guy like one of the bullies that was outside the house playing pranks on him? Or was this guy in there with him?

I think he was in there with him. Okay. Uh, no, I'm not sure. Yeah, it's hard to tell, right? Like, they all kind of look alike a little bit. I mean, but I guess there's the surfer dude that looks like the karate kid guy. Linda Blair, of course, you know. Yeah, well, we know who Linda Blair is.

Sure, sure. What is that? Like he's fishing or something. something. Deep sea fishing. Is he going to pull up a shark? Why is he cracking it so slow? Looks like Superman or something. I don't know.

The stereo maybe. With the purple cape and the red jumpsuit. He said the gates of delirium, Brian. I thought that was going to drop on him. What time are you at? Um, I am at, um, 46, 20, 22, 23, 24. 4630. Okay.

Are you there? Yeah, sorry, everyone, my internet's lagging. Yeah, that can be an issue. That's the, that's the only problem with these, if you don't have, uh, hard media, right? Yeah, we, we usually, Phil usually sets up the commentary. Yeah, it is better when he shares it on the screen, isn't it? We're sure missing, Phil, this go around. Yeah, I don't know what costume he is.

I don't know. It's pretty cheesy, man. Kind of looks like a cheap version of Magneto. That's who I was thinking. I said Mysterio, I met Magneto. I think you're right. He's got the Salvation Army version of a Magneto costume. But if that was the case, he could just crush that flashlight, right?

Yeah. So what are you thinking about the new X-Men movie, Brian? You heard any more rumors or anything? I'm liking the cast. I like the... We got some familiar faces, but mostly unknown. I like that. Yeah, that's a good thing, right?

I like, what's his name is Mr. Sinister, Adam Driver. Adam Driver? Yeah. It's fitting, I guess. Yeah. Because I know they've been trying to get him. Marvel's been trying to get him for years. Yeah, but he's been tied up in the Star Wars stuff, right?

Yeah. Which I guess is Marvel now. Yeah. Are you sold yet on Professor X or not? He's a good actor, so... Right. I'm not going to shit on it until I see some. something. Did Professor

X have a mold? I don't know. They can see G.R. That. Yeah. It's so. This kid looks like you'd be in the Brady bunch or something, Brian. Yeah.

He's got a son of elf. An elf? What the fuck are they talking about? Oh, like the fairies wear boots. right? Yes.

The Black Sabbath song. They do have the Dickman Tog beds. They do indeed. Supposed to push them together when it's time for fun time. Yeah. But it doesn't look like his whiskey

dick. I guess he didn't drink the whiskey, huh? No whiskey, dick. Oh, man. Yeah. That's a pretty cool looking fireplace, man. Yes. I guess he drank some coffee or something.

Round two. That is a dangerous amount of candles. You know, it really is. And I'm still trying to figure out how all the candles got in there. I guess all the fraternity guys that were pranked and brought the candles. in advance, you think? So they set to move for this young couple? I guess, maybe?

Kind of encouraging it. I mean, even though there's no actual, you know, like full frontal nudity, Brian, this is feeling uncomfortably like a porto. Right now. Are they going to do the next death scene of just watching, just showing shadows getting chopped? They better not.

What is that sticking up? Are you tickling down? What's going on? In full clothing? Seriously. Why was he using an alias? Maybe she was supposed to meet us, Seth. Ah, okay. He's so an opportunity to...

Okay, I get it now. And then he got the whiskey dick. That girl needs to eat a sandwich, man. A little too skinny for my tent. Yeah. We can see ribcage. Yes, exactly. Oh.

He doesn't look like he's as picky as we are, Brian. Who was it, like, the Phantom of the Opera or what? I guess. I was in front of the mirror now. Yeah, flexing. Whoever you are. Seth, John. Yeah, Seth, John.

Karate Kid, dude. William Cat. Who are you this week? Did he just pop his underwear? No, he's smacking his abs. Of course, of course. You were right. I think we are going to get him in these boxes the whole movie.

I hate it when I'm right. He didn't even notice his girl's not fair. Brian, the most action that goes on around my house sometimes is I'll reach over for AJ in the bed next to me and the and the two dogs are there. They always they always lay right in the middle of the bed sprawled out. You still have your dog, right? No, I had to

give them up. Yeah. Not to get into it on here, but you know my medical situation. Oh, well, you know, I mean, you got to do what you

to do. Yeah, it was becoming a little too much with taking care of him, so. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I can definitely understand that, man. Dogs are a lot of work.

Yeah, and he was, he had the energy of two dogs. Uh-oh. It's like a double dog, huh? Yeah. Ryan, I would almost swear that's the same house from Gullies. It looks like it. I wouldn't

be surprised if it's some house in Southern California like near L.A. Yeah. You're wasting all your bullets. Oh, blacks. Oh, boy. Somebody's about to get impaled, I think. Nope. I'd rather

climb a rope ladder than that. He can't climb because of his boots. Is that what it is? That's what he said. That guy just grabbed his ass. Oh, Linda. What are you doing? Oh, Linda.

At least she's a little more curvy than the other girl was, you know? Yeah. And if this guy does not get impaled on the top of the gate, I'm going to be very disappointed, Brian. Come on. I'm over it. Cut his hands. Yep, it's a start. Come on, movie.

Finally give us some gore. There we go. go, Brian. He's in a very dangerous place right now. Oh, there we go. I thought it was going to get him in the nuts, man. That was kind of a cheat.

We never saw Seth again. No, Seth ran to the hills, I think. Go back in there and find any fuck Denise. Yeah, it's right. I think that's what she's thinking. Do we know Denise that well? I mean, that's got to be the house, Lance. I'm itching to look it up, but I'm trying to rely less on AI in the internet these days.

Maybe somebody's listening that can set us straight. Yeah, you can tell it's Southern California because of the cactus and stuff like that there. Yeah, I can't believe Ness hasn't seen Goolies go to college. Yeah, that's the bet. Oh, he'll probably say it's a one on ten, huh? Trash. He'll say, oh, no, it was comedy. Just because he said that

it might end up on a frightful reflections episode. Oh, Goonies go to college? Yeah. Oh, I think that would be ideal, man. It's a blind spot. It's an actual blind spot for him, right? Those are rare. With NAS.

You got to take advantage of them while you can. You started your 31? So I'm heading out again. I don't know if I told you, I'm headed out again tomorrow for another trip with my brother. Okay. But we're going to Vegas to see the Chiefs game. Raiders and the Chiefs. Yeah, Raiders and the Chiefs.

It's two, three and no teams. Could be a good game. Just because Des ain't here I'll say it Fuck the Raiders I don't think he likes him anymore I think he thinks they They did him dirty

By moving the team Every chance he gets Even if he's going to a wrestling event At the Raiders stadium He still says fuck the Raiders That's right Yeah I think I'm gonna I've got a

Brian I've got about nine Movies downloaded Most of them are from a AMC shutter. Uh-huh. And then I've got one from Netflix that I haven't seen. So I'm ready, man. I'm hoping to see a couple of movies on the flight each way and then a couple while I'm there. Yeah, when we do our round-up, I'm going to do two movies because I'm doing 31 with my personal list.

And then I'm doing my daughter's 31 with her. You're insane. I have the time, so Well, I'm one to talk, dude. I'm about 40% through a 1,200 page book. That's insane to me. Yeah, it is kind of insane, isn't it?

Yeah. Oh, and everybody, I will have next episode of review on Halloween The Game. The Game? Is that new? Yeah. Yeah. How does that work? Do you get to play either Michael Myers or one of the characters?

I'm not sure, but I think you can choose who you want to be. Brian, do they tie in Halloween three season of the witch? I hope so. That would be phenomenal. I hope at least when you walk by a TV and the commercials playing. Yeah, like as an Easter egg or something like that. Yeah. Yeah, that would be cool.

But it is available for digital right now, but I'm a physical media guy. So I had to wait for them to release the disc. So I'll have it next week. So let me ask you, because I haven't really played video games in forever, but does it take like forever to load the disc enough where you can actually play it onto the console? You know what? My daughter just got a PS5. Mm-hmm.

And I'm not sure what the load time is. Yeah, because I know my grandsons will get them, and they have to, like, leave it running, and before they can actually play it, it has to populate so much, you know, like into the hard drive. Yeah. And it, like, it's not like when I was a kid where you just get, like, a plastic cartridge

and put it in the Atari and just hit the red button, you know? Yeah. Oh, we got Seth John can't seem to find any help. Oh, boy. Hold on, I'll be right back. I hear a dog scratching at the door. All right. Oh, I almost found some help.

What I miss? The Goolies house? He tried to run up to a car to get help, and they just kind of drove off like he was a crazy person or something. Right. I don't see why he doesn't just. go to the police. I can't figure out if she's supposed to be

Little Red Riding Hood, Little Bo Peep. Or who is she supposed to be? He looks like one of them Bar maidens or whatever they had back in the day. Oh, like a chamber maid or something like that? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah, I guess that's it. And go with him. it's not going to be okay there are decapitated heads oh yeah have you seen a new Hellraiser game uh yeah

thinking about getting that after the Halloween one you get you're getting into gaming pretty heavy I was recommended it again for my medical stuff oh okay so that's kind of part of the therapy then basically.

Yeah. Oh, that's cool. Man, who gets, who's lucky enough to be prescribed video games, you know? Yeah. Man. Yeah. She brought up video games and I was like, oh, that's good for it? Cool.

All right, man. Here's what, you'll be to tell you why I don't play games anymore, Brian? How come? I got fucking pissed. I was getting to where I was, I could. I could finally start, like, using the controller a little bit, you know? Uh-huh. And, you know, there's, there's all these different buttons, all these different motions,

all these things that you mix a motion with a button. You know, you know what I'm saying. Yeah. And I got, and I played that game called Destroy All Humans, the Alien Invaders in, like, the 1950s. And I clear, Brian, I cleared every fucking level, okay? and then I got to the boss and I spent like three or four days trying to kill that

boss and I just said fuck it I know the feelings I used to play games with my brother rest in peace we used to go through controllers I remember those days yeah well fortunately you know I'm a grown up now

so I didn't or I print I pretend to be one at least. But yeah, I don't... I don't throw the controllers anymore, but, man, I was angry to get to that very last thing and then have to stop.

Yeah, I remember those feelings. Okay, are they finally... Did they finally get smart enough to just get outside the house, or what? I just got a pitchfork. He really did leave her. Well... This is a bad idea to go creeping around

in the woods. What could possibly go wrong? In the dark. Yeah, being separated like that. Kind of walking, that walking in the woods there and hearing him stepping on the grass and everything, Brian? Yeah. Reminded me of what are your favorite movies from a few years ago there for a minute. I'm not hearing great things about the sequel.

They never should have done one. I mean, that's the worst idea ever. He found Magneto's body. Magneto's body He couldn't He couldn't control the The metal on those gates, huh? On his hand

Okay Is that the key? Oh wait a minute Magnita wasn't the one that got pierced by the gate I don't know, I'm so confused Is that the key to the gate or what? It looked like, you're thinking of this guy, Seth John. Oh, that's right

because he barely got a little bit cut, but he got out. I know that actor. He's been in a lot of stuff, the cop. Yeah. Of course, he's a frat guy, and the cops ain't going to believe him. Right, right.

I think it's been the night in jail over dealing with those inbreds or whatever they are. Oh, the guns? You're going to go steal a gun, yeah. They really left them white. open. Boy, that was a different time. This was

way pre-9-11, huh? That's the whole arsenal laying around. Yeah, literally. With the door open, and nobody in there. Okay, so... So, Nez gave this a 10-on-10, Brian? Yeah. I hate to say this, but this is

one of the worst movies I've seen in a while. This is really stupid, man. man. He's going to... He climbed up the window. Yeah. I guess we just...

We just have to say it was a different time and leave it at that, right? Yeah, it was 81. Yeah, they left guns out. They left them in the streets, right? Yeah. With a sign that said, take me for free? Yeah. They used to hand them out to kids trick-or-treating.

You guys have pretty lax gun laws up there in Alaska, don't you? Yeah, they're trying to change them. Yeah, I can see how it wouldn't be a good idea in the city, but, you know, out in the country, I mean, I imagine there's some people who have to hunt to eat. Oh, they do not give a fuck outside the city. I wouldn't think so, right? Yeah. So, a little story about the Iron Maiden concert. Uh-huh.

Because, you know, of course, Phil was there. And they left, they left Galveston really early, right? So my brother and I were like trying to figure out, do we try to park there? Do we, you could, you could park at the Bill Miller barbecue, which had to be there by like three in the afternoon. And it was 50 bucks, Brian to park. 50 bucks. Dude, if you wanted to park at the actual event, it was $80. Yeah.

So, you know, my brother's like, well, you know, maybe we ought to try parking there or something. And, you know, we'll just go in 50-50. And I said, man, I don't want to even pay 25 bucks. So I found the parking ride thing, the city buses, the VAS system in San Antonio. And it was supposed to be $1.30 each way. And the parking ride was literally about a mile from his house. So thank God I talked him into it. And we parked his truck.

Got on the parking ride. They didn't even charge us to $1.30, dude. We got in the door, and the guy was just waving us along. Like, you know, keep going. You're okay? So, dude, we got a free ride to the concert, paid $0 to park, and probably got out of there before anybody else. Philip parked 40, or no, he parked 20 blocks away.

Yeah. He didn't get there until halfway halfway. through Megadeth. He completely missed the first band. So I think we chose wisely. Yeah, that's insane, huh? I mean, I guess supply and demand.

Yeah, I guess, but that just seems wrong. Yeah. Oh, and there's, I don't know if you've ever been to any, like, sports events or football games or anything. Yeah. I have. Um, so you know

how, like, whatever neighborhood it's in, sometimes there'll be people that'll park like, you know, six or eight cars in their yard and like squeeze them real tight together. Uh-huh. People were doing that too, but like they had the cars so close together, Brian,

I'd be afraid that it'd scratch up my car or something, you know? Yeah. What? I found him out of the vineyard, I don't want to tell you. Peter's dead. I think Peter had the key in his hand. I think Peter,

I think Peter had whiskey dick, Brian. Oh, she's coming this time. So is this really supposed to be like a horror classic or something? I don't know. I picked it because this allegedly falls under Halloween. Kind of Halloween adjacent? Yeah, the night it takes place. Yeah, that makes sense.

Yeah, no, I mean, it's not something that we shouldn't watch because it's, you know, it was a blind spot for you too, right? Yeah, I watched it, but I watched it when I was super young, and I don't remember. I just remember Linda Blair's in it. I have no clue. You remember her cleavage, don't you, Brian? Yeah, I was a young bride. Mm-hmm.

And like you said, it's nice to check off these obscure movies. Oh, for sure. I remember passing by the video box in the video store dozens of times, you know. But you can't watch everything. Not if you're reading 1,200 page books. Because what episode would be on? Like 540 or 41? Yeah, 540, I think.

That means we've watched well over a thousand movies. Not to mention 31 days and... 31 days, action return, string fiends. Probably at least... At least 1500. No, more than that. Yeah. That's a lot of movies, man.

Because there was a time back in the day we were doing for like the year in horror. We were doing like three movies. That's right. Yes. Remember the one Marcy was on? We did that that one with the guy with the camera that murdered people with his camera. Oh, peeping Tom. Yeah, peeping Tom.

And we did Psycho. on that one and what was the Night of the Living Dead maybe? Yeah, that was when we were in the 60s. That's right. We've come a long way. Yeah, we're in the 90s now. Yeah, with some stops off

and tremors and oh, we haven't done the Hellraiser movies, have we? Have we done any of them? I think we did the first one. We did the first one and then the remake, the one with the female pinhead.

That wasn't bad. No, it was really good. Yeah, I'm surprised they didn't do anything off of that one. Yeah, well, you know, it's probably harder now to, there's just so much, so much competing for your attention these days, you know? Like, I was shocked, Brian, when I went into, of course, you watch a lot of these throughout the year. You don't just wait until October.

but I was shocked how many 2026 or late 2025 movies were in Shutter. Yeah. I mean, I'm going to get half my 31 days just from new shutter releases, man. Oh, yeah, absolutely. But I'm really jonesing to see buddies. Yeah, buddy's a good one.

I can't wait. Yeah, I'm hearing way too many good things. They're releasing the sing-along version. Stop it. Are you serious? I think tomorrow. I'll have to see if I can find it while I'm in Vegas. Come on, something happens. They've been walking through the dark for like 10 minutes now. You know, I kind of half jokingly said they were being chased by Inbreds,

but when you look at this set, it's almost a rise to be a barbarian a little bit, Brian. Oh, the underground stuff? Yeah, yeah. I wonder if, I wonder if this movie, he kind of inspired Crager. What the fuck? Texas chainsaw.

Yes, definitely. She had a rat crone up her face. I saw that. Good job on her for just not moving with that rat crowing on her face. Yeah. Well, that takes practice, right? Or a lot of quailudes. Yeah.

Yeah, Brian, I'm kind of excited about about going to Vegas, man. Nice. I hope you have fun, man. Yeah, I'm going to... I think I told you I'm going to get there a lot earlier than my brother, so I'm going to get the bus pass. It's like $4 a day, and you can ride the bus as much as any of the buses as much as you want.

Oh, that's what we did. Yeah, dude. Last time we were there, because every time before, we rent a car. Yeah. And someone told us, you know, just get a bus pass. That seems to be the way to go.

I'm going to go check out the pinball museum. Have you ever been there? No. Yeah, dude, they have, I think they have over 3,000 classic pinball machines in there, and they all work. You can play them for like a quarter or 50 cents each. Nice. I love pinball. Yeah.

I think that's going to be my first thing I do, because it's south of where we're staying. I think the first thing I'm going to do, because I've got half of it. half of Friday, half of tomorrow to myself and basically all day, Monday, because they're leaving at like six in the morning and I don't leave till, I'm doing the red eye to save money. So I leave at 9.15 at night. And, yeah, I think I'm going to check out the pinball museum and then maybe head kind of like the Arts District and just walk around, get a lot of steps in, you know. Yeah, be careful on the bus, though.

Yeah. interesting people. Oh, yeah, I'm looking forward to seeing the interesting people. What I don't want to do, I think, is going to the underground city. Have you heard of this? Yeah.

It's supposed to be, and nobody's really sure, because some accounts say it's 100 miles of tunnels, some accounts say it's 300 miles of tunnels, you know, who really knows? Has anybody on it mapped it out? Denise is dead, too. My daughter wants to go to the spear.

You know, it's funny, Saturday night, Metallica is going to be playing there. Nice. While we're in town. It's expensive, though. I was going to say, not nice. One ticket, right? One ticket was, of course, they were all by scalpers, right? Because they sold out quick, I'm sure.

But one ticket would be anywhere from $1,200 to $1,900. I think I'll just listen to him on YouTube Yeah, because we've seen a video When they play Wizard of Oz They got like Stuff blown around And apples fall in

Well, look, the Wizard of Oz It's not cheap, but it's like A hundred bucks, all right? Yeah And it's something you're going to do once in your life So, you know, maybe you kind of budget for that. I could justify that. The only problem is the one day I've got all to myself,

the Monday is the one day of the week they don't play it. Yeah. So that's not an option. But I'd throw down $100 for that, I think, you know, one time. Yeah, I've seen videos where they show like UFC events in there. Yeah, that would be a trip. Yeah. Or a ref.

Can you imagine how they do wrestling? there? Oh. People would go insane, man. What would be really good there? What would you? Maybe Hellraiser.

We were talking about Hellraiser. Would that be cool in the sphere? Yeah, I can go for that. It's got to be Hellraiser, too. That's the best one, in my opinion. Yeah, Hellraiser 2. Yeah, just kind of like show the movie on one screen and then have like all kinds of weird

stuff going on the others. It kind of looks like they're, you know, they're coming after you. Yeah, Steve, if you're listening, make that the next franchise. Oh. I hope he's listening. We'll be doing that one for a while.

Yeah, that's okay for rewatches, right? Although there's some bad bad ones in that series, man. I like four, which a lot of people don't like. That's the one in space. I kind of like that one.

But after four, I think it gets bad. All right. Stop me if you've heard this one. Fat pinhead with a typewriter. Do you remember that one? Yeah, that was like Hellraiser Revelations or something. That was so bad. That wasn't Doug Bradley either.

No, it was a fat dude, right? Yeah. Yeah, that one was rough. Sorry if we're not going to. commentating on the movie. It's just a bunch of of people walking around in the dark for the past 20 minutes. We got

Seth John back with a shotgun he stole. Yeah, Seth's back. Now he's getting it, it looks like. Yeah, so he got the shotgun for no reason. Well, I don't know. He ain't dead yet. He lost a shotgun now. Well, that's not good.

Oh, he did some Brazilian jiu-jitsu on him there. You see that? Yeah. Oh, I almost had to show. Oh, close. Oh, just a bit outside. Now he's going to get that shotgun.

Boom. That's a nice little stat there. Yeah. Definitely beat CGI fire any day of the week. Thought he was going to do a Michael Myers and get up and he looked down. He wasn't going to be there. I shot him six times. we gotta have somebody

right into us if that's the same house from Cootlees because we're too hard-headed looking up oh here he comes dude that looks like a that's kind of cool

that looked like a 1950s horror movie or something yeah it looks like Luke Skywalker a little there I think I'm at a six and a half with this one because there are some

there are some cool moments in here I agree yeah and practice especially for the time Yeah. I'm going to be very generous, I think, and give it a four. Unless the end just completely drops out from under us and then it may get a three. I'd said it was the worst movie we've seen in a while. That was definitely not true. We've seen a few stinkers lately.

Oh, yeah. Oh, well, I've told you guys that the first Tremors movie, I would, I'd give it a nine on further thought. remember I said eight and a half or something but tremors too Brian I missed I missed the punchline of the joke on that one I give that one like a two and a half man yeah what did it for me was the new guy

and you know what what took me out of it was the new guy so yeah just every time he popped on screen right it was kind of a cute skit they did about the Trimmers video game. Yeah. Oh, Seth got

snatched up. Well, couldn't last forever. You got to have a final girl. Oh, there's shotguns. And who's this guy supposed to be? Little Lord Funtleroy or something? They both look kind of like they're in medieval costumes.

Not medieval, but like you said, a little after that. She's like, somebody's got to have some balls here, around here. he's he's got the ball he's got the balls and she's got the brass right yeah he's not even coming with her no he's he's got he's got emotional whiskey dick right now or do they drug stuff out in this movie she almost looks like mrs claus there yeah from this angle from thick with the colors right sess did

hey when she bought that costume at spirit house It was just in a package that says Halloween costume. It could be whatever you want it to be. But you've seen those ones, right? Like where it's, it's obviously Jack Sparrow, but it's called like parrot pirate or something like that. Are they? That's, I saw one.

I saw one that looked just like Art the Clown a little bit. even it had the glasses with the sunflowers around them, you know. And it was called Bart the Cloud. And it's like you can't sue them because they're probably all made in China or Bangladesh or something, right? Yeah. It looks like Night of the Living Dead, man. But in color, they're coming to get you, Barbara. Mother no.

Kill him. There we go. He took a flying leap. Oh, man. What that hairdo? She almost reminds me of Lisa Simpson. What's her name? The actress that was in Maxwell.

Oh, Yerdly Smith. Yeah, Yerley Smith. From that angle. You know, the movie's boring when we have to start coming up with people to compare them to. Yeah. there's that rope ladder again that would have been that would have been me in gym class brian i hated climbing the rope oh man i didn't even ever try there was always that kid that was super good at it too well it wasn't me i used to i used to tell him i had to go to the infirmary or something

but get an aspirin what was that movie mr woodcock remember that one with uh billy bob thornton Was it Stifler? Yeah. He was like dating his mom or something. Yeah. Something funny with the rope. Did they grease it or something like that? So he slid off.

I can't remember. Okay, we're getting down to the nitty-gritty here, I think. We have our final girl. Did she come up in the March Maddis, Best Final Girl? I don't think so. Yeah, I don't remember. because this is a classic Final Girl situation here. Yeah.

Oh, Magneto. Yeah, finding all the bodies having to run the gauntlet with people after her. Finding the McGuffin. It's that aluminum foil on his costume. Go to the gate now. you know what that wouldn't be a bad idea Brian to do a Magneto costume and you could

you know you could fashion different items out of aluminum foil and then crush them I don't know maybe that's a stretch no that's a good idea do they have a Magneto picked out for the X-Men movie or he's not going to be in the first one is he I heard rumors

that they're going to cast somebody but he wouldn't be a big okay he'd just be introduced in the first movie the car that won't start all the tropes are here Brian or the lights on that the batteries did the same way the same way

the whole place was filled with candles when they got there it's not your battery it's your alternator oh she's a mechanic huh coincidentally Oh, worked out a little better than Resident Evil, huh? Yeah.

Well, maybe not. Just get out and run at this point. That was a great scene in Resident Evil, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, the more I think back about that movie, Brian, I think the more I like it. Yeah. It's definitely top five for me so far. Yeah.

That's strong words, man. This early in the year, we still got three months left. But, I mean, I guess when you know, you know, right? Yeah, what is our big one for October? Other mommy, I'm hearing positive stuff about that one. Yeah, and that's one AJ will actually go with me to see, because she's kind of got a girl crush on the actress. Jessica Chastain?

Oh, she loves her. Oh, she has great taste. very like universal monsters looking right yeah yeah i think close to wrapping it up here which is which is good because i have my alarm set for 3.20 a.m. Eastern time yep there you got another little quietness and then the resolution now will there be a jump scare at the end yes or no what is your prediction waiting on this twist that Nes was talking about oh he said there's a twist okay They were all frat boys all along, huh?

That's what I'm thinking. And she actually killed them all. That would be a good one. Like she's going to find out, oh, no, I killed Todd. Yeah. Or Garth? No, not Garth, Seth. I think you nailed it, Brian.

From the look on her face. But you would have thought she would scream, right, if it was him. Yeah. Yeah, I can see how eight-year-old Brian would have loved this, or how old you were? I didn't watch it when it came out. I was one when it came out. I was fucking with you when I asked,

did you see in the theater? I knew you weren't as old as me, and well, there was no twist that I could see. Okay. All right. That was a movie. Six and a half, Brian? Six.

Okay. All right, well, we want to thank you guys for listening. to another episode of the horror returns. We would always love to hear your feedback and ideas. You can reach us at thehorrorreturns at gmail.com or just visit our website and do a message from there, thehorrorreturns.com. Next week, we continue our tremors retrospective

with Trimmers 3 back to perfection. And Trimmers 2, the legend begins. So, Brian, until the horror returns again, good time.