The Horror Returns - THR Presents: 31 Nights Of Horror, Part 3 With Lance & Brian

Episode Date: October 27, 2021

Brian and Lance take on the next batch of October goodies. Thanks for listening!

Guys, welcome back to Brian and Lance doing their 31. We decided on 31 nights of horror. Is that correct? Yeah, it's interchangeable. I guess it depends on if you're in the holiday season, you say 31 nights of Halloween, which kind of doesn't make sense to me because it's not Halloween every night.

Yes, indeed. But you know what? Every day in October's Halloween, right? Yeah. to make it so. So we've done 14 so far, Brian. I think we got eight the first go around and then six. So I'm sure you're way ahead of me, but I'm up to eight.

So we're going to do like 15 through 22 tonight? 15 through 22. I think I'm there. Yeah. Got it? Yeah. All right. Well, as usual, man, you want to kick it off?

Yeah. this one I'll run through real quick very quick because we reviewed it for the show and that is Halloween Kills Ah, you're cheating a little bit now Yeah, I had to throw it in there I couldn't find nothing That I wanted to watch that day

But I still enjoy it It's definitely has the fans Divided But I think For a bridge movie A movie that's connecting a beginning and the end, I think it's fine.

And the title gave us what I wanted because he killed a whole bunch of people in that movie. Yeah, I was listening to the League of Geeks talk about it yesterday. I did a really long commute, dude, to

go to Austin to help my mom with stuff. As everybody who knows that heard our horrible recording quality, when I'm out there in the middle of nowhere, I can barely get a signal. but yeah listen to them talk about it and they said there were 28 kills in the movie

did you know that? Yeah, highest in any Halloween movie. All right, so thumbs up, right? Yeah, thumbs up and Steve, Sean, over at League Geeks. Dune was an amazing movie. I don't give a fuck what you say. Still love you guys though.

Yeah, differences of opinion. man, that's what keeps us going, right? Yeah, they thought Dune was highly boring. Uh-oh. That's interesting. I haven't heard too many negative reviews about that movie at this point. Yeah. I mean, of course, you know, they said the visuals were great,

but they, I think if you don't really know the story and know part of the world that you're getting into, I think you can find it a little boring, but I thought the pacing was great. But, you know, If you want to hear our thoughts on that, listen to the last episode. Yep. All right.

Well, my number 15, I would say run, don't walk away from this piece of shit. I'm a huge fan of the Muppets, man. I was so excited, so excited to show the new Muppets haunted house to the granddaughter. Or Haunted Mansion, excuse me, Muppets Haunted Mansion. This thing ended up being a one-hour-long advertisement for Disney's Haunted Mansion attraction with no heart to it at all. Horrible acting. The Muppets just weren't the Muppets because, you know how they tend to be pretty not necessarily risque. I mean, it's not like, you know, Team America World Police or anything like that.

but they can get a little bit more adult-oriented where, you know, the jokes are at least funny. There was nothing funny about this piece of shit. Not a bottom 10. It wasn't that bad. But have you, it's on Disney Plus. So if you've got it, you're going to have it available anyway. But have you, you check this one out?

It's on the docket. I haven't got a chance to it. When I was younger, you know, big fan of the Muppets. you know, my favorite movie was Muppets Take Manhattan. Great, great movies, man. But I just kind of felt like since they kind of came back, they just haven't been the same.

Very soft, right? Yeah. All right, let's move on quickly. All right. My number 16 is a Friday to 13th fan film called Jason's Rising. It's a little under an hour. I believe the same guy that plays Jason is from Jason or excuse me, I don't know what I'm talking about.

The guy that plays Jason is the same guy that played Jason in the Never Hike Alone movies. That was a big fan favorite, man. Yeah, this one, straightforward story, kind of some criminals kind of break out. I can't remember if they broke out of prison or a prison bus, but they're kind of running through the woods and the marshals are, marshals are after them. And of course, you know, it's not the best place to be in,

especially when you're near Camp Crystal Lake. So pretty. Prisoners that escape out of a prison bus only to be slaughtered. Is that what it is? Yeah, pretty much. Well, Jason just. Sounds interesting. He's an equal opportunity.

He slaughters anybody. And if anybody hasn't seen, it, I won't say anything, but somebody from the original, one of the original movies pops up in here. Ah, okay. Good fan film, decent kills in there.

Story was kind of straightforward, but, you know, it's barely an hour, so. I'm guessing, I'm guessing it's on YouTube, right? Yep. I go to the Horror Returns Facebook group and put the link in there, also

on the main Facebook page. So anybody wants to check it out. Check out, check out Jason's Rising. Jason's Rising? Jason Rising. Jason Rising. Might add that to the list, man. I watched that Never Hike Alone.

Probably wasn't as impressed as you in Nesworth. But, hey, man, I'll give it a shot. And got my Blu-ray for Never Hack Alone in the snow. because I donated to the the Kickstarter GoFundMe or whatever it was Very nice dude Support up-and-coming filmmakers

Because Me and Nez have watched a lot of short films And Lance I can tell you that Nowadays short films They are movie quality stuff Like there's a lot of great filmmakers Out there All right, I'm going to check it

out. So the next one, I guess we're on 16, started watching a movie, dude. The copy that I had was so bad. I'm glad we're talking about this because now I believe it's on Hulu now, but we tried to watch Gaia.

And does that movie switch from English to German? Or was just my copy that way? Like while they're talking? Yeah, it does. because I've seen it once.

It's been a while, but I thought it was in a different language at one point. And then everybody started speaking English. Well, the copy that I had access to did not have subtitles. So I think if I rewatched on Hulu with subtitles, we should be fine. So scratch that. Hopefully that'll be on the next list. But I went with an old favorite, man. The original.

the man who is a day walker because he's a vampire but he can walk he can walk the earth during the day and he kicks ass and takes names and of course I'm talking about Blade I remember this movie so vividly because if you'll recall this came out at a time we didn't have

Nez is always talking about how these kids are spoiled these days with all the superhero movies and Star Wars they are Disney they are. It wasn't quite that way in the 90s. So when Blade came out and it was actually a literal

R-rated, full on blood bath with F-bombs all over the place, man, I was just in heaven. Yeah, they when they talk about movies that kickstarted the comic book movie craze, a lot of people go

with X-Men, but Blade came out before then. Man, AJ and enjoyed it too and yeah I mean you got to forgive the older you know special effects a little bit could certainly be redone as it as it is going to be redone from what I understand but yeah I'm sure much better effects but uh from what I'm hearing we might get that movie a little bit sooner than we thought I'm fine with that man I'm ready I'm ready for the new blade um and if Wesley Snipes doesn't at least show up in it I'm going to be extremely disappointed he has

to have a cameo. But the guy they got to play Blade, Mahershala Ali, he's an amazing actor. Well, see, that's what scares me a little bit, is he's almost too serious of an actor, at least in the roles that I've seen him in. And I'm hoping he can pull off the badass and still keep the wisecracks in there, like Wesley Snipes with the one-liners. Yeah, I thought, I mean, he didn't have one-liners, but I thought he played a good villain in, what was it, Luke Cage?

Yeah, he was good in Luke Cage. He does a lot of art house stuff. Seems like he does a lot of indie movies, which is a good thing. I mean, that's the sign of a person that is picking and choosing the roles they want to play. So I always got respect for that. But yeah, dude, to wash the taste of the Muppets out of my mouth from that haunted mansion, Blade was just the ticket. All right. My next one here on the list is a movie. I'm sad to say, I know it's got like a cult following, but it just took me now to watch it, and that is Lake Mungo. Not Lake Eden.

No. Not Lake Placid. Nope. So what is Lake Mungo? Lake Mungo is a movie. It's shot documentary style. so it kind of has a realistic feel to it it's about a girl that goes missing I believe people think she drowned in the lake

and the family starts to experience things and see things and like there I'm not going to spoil it even though the movie came out like a while ago there's one scene where the I think he's the brother in the family he sets up a camera

in the house at night and then lets it film all night and then one night something kind of walks across the hallway and he kind of freeze frames it and it's the sister Ouch, sounds like paranormal activity all over again.

No, it actually kind of gave me creepy vibes. I think it was the documentary style because it almost felt like it was not a movie. Oh, interesting. All right. So what are you... Are you recommending it?

Yeah, I recommend it. If you're looking for jump scares or, like you said, a paranormal activity type movie, this is not it. It's basically a family trying to figure out what happened to their daughter,

why she disappeared. I guess she was acting a little strange the days before she disappeared and they just start to notice that when they take videos or photos that there's a there's a figure kind of in the background somewhere and like there was a photo taken and they kind of zoom in on the photo and it looks like her just kind of standing there oh wow what a trip yeah so but like i said if you're looking for jump scares and what paranormal activity type shit then this is not for you Not the one, huh?

No. All right. Lake Mungo. Maybe I will add it to my list of Lake movies. I think it's on Amazon Prime, I think. That's certainly a plus right there. All right, so I guess I recommend for that. For my next movie, I went to the theater to check this one out.

Unfortunately, it was relegated to the smallest screen in the theater. So it was kind of just like watching it on. big screen TV, but that's fine. But have you heard of this new movie called Lamb? Yeah, I think I've heard of it. It's a Norwegian film, I believe. Yeah, Norwegian kind of art-housey 824 film. Yeah, and it's kind of on the, for me, it was kind of on the, you know, more good

than bad side of A-24, but it definitely, it wasn't up there with you. you know, like hereditary or something like that. It was definitely very odd. Without giving spoilers away, I can say that it's this couple. And they give a little bit of their backstory, but they don't say it outright, but you can kind of surmise that they lost a child. Okay. So they're living out in this beautiful countryside where they're living,

and they do a lot of really nice photography of the mountains around them and stuff like that. But they breed lambs and they just see them both look at this baby lamb. There's like a scene where they're birthing the babies and like helping the mothers along with them. And they look down and then they look at each other and you're like, what the fuck's going on here? Next thing you know, the lamb is dressed up as a baby living in their house. They're carrying it around. and it's a lamb with like one human hand and then three hubs

and then things get really weird when the guys, it's a husband and wife, when his brother shows up to stay with him. I guess I'd give it a soft recommend. It's not, I really, really wanted to see it just because I wanted to know what the fuck it was possibly about. But it's not like a top 10 or anything, man. It's unfortunately not.

on that upper echelon, for me at least, of A-24. But, you know, lust photography. Pretty good acting. Pretty good little family story there. But, and a little bit, you know, one of those movies that's kind of quiet until the last five minutes and then it goes a little bit bad shit crazy. So if you're into that, check it out. Not a bad movie. Cool.

All right. Number 18. all right we got the Chuckie not it's not a reboot series continuation series

yes then we got the Day of the Dead series that's right I'm going to talk about the movie they did and that is

slumber party massacre they reboot this movie for sci-fi is that where slumber party massacre is Yeah, okay I'm kind of in the middle

of whether I liked it or hated it Okay I'm also in the middle of should I recommend it Or should I not recommend it Because I think there was some faults here Because of it being on sci-fi I felt compared to what I've seen On Chuckie in the Day of the Dead series

I kind of felt like they went a little soft In this movie at points Well, it's a shame. Why would they do that? I don't know, but there was some comedic moments to it that I kind of had a laugh at because they take certain tropes and topics, and they kind of flip it in a comedic way where the women are there to kill the driller killer. And there is in another cabin, a group of men. Real kind of dushy brodude type guys. and they're there to save them, but the guys are just kind of like, we don't need help.

We're men, you know, and, you know, it's just, it's stuff they kind of flip in a comedic way. Like, they're telling them don't run out there into the woods. And the guy, one of the guys is like, well, I have to. It's my, the toxic masculinity in me just says I have to run out there and be. Brian, they did not use that line in the movie. Yeah, they did. And it's just kind of, but they do it in a comedic kind of to make fun of it. Well, I don't know.

It sounds like it might have some promise. Yeah, I just was kind of let down by the kills. I mean, there's some kills where you see what's happening. Yeah, I mean, there's a lot of kills where they kind of cut away. As long as it doesn't take itself too seriously, I could probably get into it. Yeah, it's completely cheesy, but it's cheese that I believe that's what they were going for. Okay. So they knew what they were doing, you think?

Yeah, this is definitely when they were rebooting this. They were going to make a serious movie. And it's definitely not a certain Christmas movie that we watched. Well, I'll give it a shot. I'm glad you told me where it is. I didn't, I knew it was out because I heard somebody talk about it, but I didn't know if it was streaming. And I have to rewatch the original one.

I don't remember the Driller-Killer kind of sounding. kind of the way he talked was kind of comical because there was one girl right before he he used his drill on her he was like i love you i was like did you sound like that in the original one oh but even though even the guy that was playing the driller killer like the way he was playing it like he was being goofy on purpose like trying to be overly like menacing and serious but in a way that i felt it was like they were trying to be comedic about it medic about it. Well, man, you're not selling it too hard, but it's, you know, I've got sci-fi, so I will watch it.

I'll stream it. I'll check it out. It's on sci-fi if you want to see a bunch of bro dudes, dude bros, or whatever, kind of get it. Kind of bothers me that you say they don't have a lot of gore in it, though. No. I mean, there was one good kill that I appreciated. Maybe I'll pass. Maybe I'll pass.

yeah that's what that's what like I said Lance is while I'm kind of in the middle part of me wants to recommend it just because of the cheesiness but another part of me was like this is kind of bad and kind of because I I kind of like the first episode of Day of Dead and I'm definitely on board for Chuckie so I was a little let down by this this was all like in the same week that they released all these three things that's that's a good that's a good sign man yeah and sci-fi don't cancel any of these shows. Let them build an audience. Because Lance, we talked about the sci-fi shows they fucking cancel when they shouldn't have. Yeah, they don't seem to give shows much of a chance on sci-fi, do they?

No. I mean, they lost the expanse to Amazon, right? Yeah, Blood Drive got canceled, and that was a good show. Oh, that's right, after one season. Oh, what was that one? Shit, I'm blanking on it. It was like a...

amazing. What was it? Channel Zero. I know that had a big following. Okay. They canceled that too after like a couple. I think after the third season. Well, they've sounds like a, we see a pattern emerging here, huh?

Yeah. And what was? It's hope for the best. There was a show based on a comic book with like high school kids that were being trained as assassins that I really thought was a good show. And they canceled that. Yeah, they canceled that after one season. Jesus Christ, man.

I mean, with as many streaming services as there are out there, you would think somebody is going to pick some of this stuff up, right? Yeah. And I think they're the ones that passed on the Tremor series. Well, let's hope for the best, man. We'll hope for the best, right? Yeah. Speaking of the polar opposite of the best,

once again Brian as I continue to watch movies your prediction about the um uh fuck escape room too talking out of my top 10 being shoved aside brutally

might come true because I watched the movie that you and Philip reviewed that I missed that week and I should have kept it that way um starring Megan because as everyone knows it's Jeff

what's his name is Jeffrey Dean Martin Morgan Morgan see I don't even know the motherfuckers right it's just digging now rest in peace Dean Martin good God the unholy was bad oh gosh this was like beginning of the year that it came out oh that's rough stuff man it kind of it had me in the trailer the the whole stuff with the with the Virgin Mary she was like healing people

but I thought it was a good idea, but then the movie's just fucking boring. Oh, yeah, it could have been a great, a great movie, right? Great idea for a movie. Yeah, making people think this girl has the power of healing people and could have went like completely different with it, but no, they didn't. And everything was just so set up. You know what I mean? Like, so he goes out there, he's this struggling. What is he a reporter or photographer or something like that?

Yeah. He goes out like weekly world news type reporter, scumbag type. Yeah. Like the night flyer a little bit. Yeah, definitely. He goes out there and literally creates the problem that results in this girl being possessed. And even if they had just not called it the unholy, maybe they should have called it, you know, Mother Mary or something like that, right? And then maybe we might not have known what was going to happen.

from the very beginning and, you know, maybe been, been at least fooled by it, but, uh, this looks like something that Jeffrey Dean Morgan films. When he had like a week off of the Walking Dead or something. This is trash.

Definitely bottom 10, man. What, what else are we talking about tonight? Uh, number 19 is a complete, uh, pass on this one.

Uh-oh. It is, uh, believe it came out this year and it's called behemoth. I've heard. I almost saw that. So you said, don't bother. Oh, it's boring.

It's boring. The effects are bad. You'll probably most likely not recognize anybody in the cast. Oh, no. Essentially, it's this guy he's trying to, he's going after this company because some kind of chemicals affected his daughter, and she's like got cancer and dying.

Oh, no. so not even so bad it's good then yeah he ends up kidnapping like one of the head guys and he's trying to get them to kind of fucking tell you know what they're doing there why are these chemicals hurting people and oh boy he kind of gets involved in a kind of hellish situation as I can put it the people he's messing with are kind of so we have a pattern going here bad demonic movies movies, huh? Yeah, it's just, and there was an effect. If the effects of the monster, there's a couple of monsters in here that they, if the effects were better, I might have it a little bit more of credit, but they were just completely CGI trash. Oh, that's terrible.

Well, so it's a pass. Oh, it's a hard pass. Okay, behemoth, hard pass. All right, I'm going to move on to my next one. Got a first time watch here, man. I've heard a lot of good things about this being a cult classic. It was in the mood for a little Vincent Price. So we checked out the abominable Dr. Fibes.

Have you ever seen it? No, I'm thinking about going on a deep dive of Vincent Price movies because I just picked up on Blu-ray. What is it called? Where is it? The mask of Red Death. Yes, right stuff he worked on with Roger Corman, right? Yes, for the most part.

So, yeah, I'm definitely interested to hear what you're saying about this one because it's also on the list of mine. Oh, man, this was the absolute opposite of what I thought I was going to get, man. I thought it was going to be just like an old school, you know, kind of a corny horror movie. Let me put it to you this way. You've pretty much got to at least get green for this one. Period. End of story. Not a problem.

As a matter of fact, I was so convinced that Vincent Price and everyone else on the crew had to have been tripping on acid, that I went and did a little research. Come to find out, Vincent Price has a historical reference as being the first person to drop acid in a movie scene. And it was in 1958's The Tingler. so I wouldn't be a bit surprised if this guy was tripping balls the whole the whole movie um strong recommend by the way um whether you're sober like we were or you know tripping your tripin your your brain out

or at least just I think at least a little bit of smoke would be perfect for this one um I am doing all 31 first time watches so Maybe this will show up on the next show. Well, then I'm not going to give anything away. I'm not going to give you any spoilers, but lots of lush colors, great characters. And he really is abominable. And Dr. Fives was kind of like the original jigsaw, because he would set these traps up for people. And I'm like, holy shit, if Saw didn't steal that almost directly.

I think you're going to enjoy it. Man, I really do. And I do have some nice cookies here. Some, what are they called? Snickadoobies. It's a great... Okay, you've got to put it on the list, man. You're going to love it.

I promise you. All right, then we'll talk about it next time, then. Very nice. All right, number 20, new Netflix release, a vampire movie called Night Teeth. I've been waiting to hear about this one. Okay. teeth. Nothing special when it comes to the vampire stuff, stuff we've seen before. But I will say I like the world they created because essentially vampires have been around and people have had, this is kind of underground stuff. It's not like publicly known.

Okay. But humans and vampires have had a truce. And they're kind of set up in Los Angeles like kind of gangs, like different. territories run by different humans and vampires. And on this night, uh, somebody, I'm not going to spoil it, somebody tries to

take out all these kind of leaders and break the truce and take over Los Angeles. Very stylish movie. All right. I'm a, gory. Yeah, I'm a sucker for that kind of storyline. You've already got me.

Yeah. Um, beautiful women in here, of course. You got to have beautiful women when you talk about vampire movies. Well, sure. I like the cast for the, yeah, I like pretty much the entire cast. Nobody I would say was bad in it. Kind of straightforward story.

You don't really need to get into it and think about it a lot. I will say this, though, if anybody knew that Megan Fox was in it and was going to watch this for Megan Fox, you're going to be disappointed. She barely shows up, huh? She, I don't know, she just happened to be in town when her machine gun, Kelly,

were out to dinner, and somebody called her and was like, can you stop by and film a scene for like five minutes? I guess so. I mean, she looks good as a vampire elder, because I think that's the role she plays. She's, like, one of the top ones in her territory.

Yeah, I can, I could buy that, man. And looks like Theon Grayjoy shows up in it as well, huh? Yeah, he's a vampire and he's an asshole again. I'm going to check this out. Not as bad as the asshole as John Wick. He's not killing puppies or anything. Right.

Okay. Well, I'm in, dude. I'm looking through the cast here. I am totally in on this one. Yeah, and the two main vampire women, they're kind of fun. Yeah? Yeah, I wouldn't mind hanging out with them. I mean, I wouldn't because they'd probably kill me at the end of the night, but.

Yeah, but oh, what a night? Yeah, definitely. All right, well, this is one I know AJ will watch with me, so that's helpful too. Yeah, and I'm trying to think, was there anything too risque that maybe the girls can't watch, but I think it'll be fine. All right. Well, it's going on to the list, man. I was just waiting to hear your review

because vampire movies can be hit or miss. Yeah, it's... I'm not going to say it's great, but... Okay. You check it out. Worth the watch. Yeah. Okay.

All right, we're up to number 20 then, so next on my list is sometimes top 10 at the end of the year comes from some very strange places. For example, I was blown away last year that Uncle Peckerhead ended up on my top ten. That's a great name for a movie. It's a great movie, man. This is another one of those little indie movies on Shutter that's headed for the top ten, I think, man.

Have you seen Slacks yet? Yeah, I've seen it. I saw it earlier this year. I loved it. The killer pants, dude. And then it actually had a backstory. that made sense. It had a message in there too.

It did. It had a lot of messages in there. And I always love it when those, you know, people that are so pretentious get killed off. Like, for example, the one that we didn't like too much, the Velvet Buzz Saw or whatever. And obviously this year's Candy Man had a lot of that. So it's always fun to watch these pretentious creeps get killed. killed off. So highly recommend slacks. I don't want to give too much away, but it's killer

blue jeans. That's all you know. And when you go into it, don't take it too seriously. I mean, there is a serious message in there, but the movie is not to, I don't think it's made to be like take it seriously. So,

definitely watch slacks, but do not watch the killer sofa. I had so much fun watching slacks. I was completely blown away with how much I enjoyed it. Nice. Well, moving on to number 21. It's kind of an older movie, but I have not seen it.

And I also found it on Shudder. And that is Nina Forever. Essentially, a guy and a girl meet. They kind of like each other on the first night where they're about to have sex. His dead girlfriend appears by coming. coming out of the bed. I think I've seen this, man.

This sounds really familiar. It's labeled as a horror comedy, but I would also, I would throw drama in there because there's a little bit of dramatic scenes in there. Because it's his dead girlfriend that died in a car crash. But every time, every time him and his new girlfriend make love, like the way she appears, is like they're on the bed, doing their business. and then the sheets start to get stained with blood, like soap with blood,

and then she comes up through the bed, and they realize, because he keeps trying to tell her, he was, you know, what do you want? We're broken up, and she was just, she keeps telling them,

just because I died, don't mean we broke up. Oh. And it gets to the point, yeah, it gets to the point where, because the other girlfriend is just basically, you're not going to,

you're not going to scare me. You're not going to, you're not going to chase me away. and it gets to the point where she starts showing up without them having sex and kind of tormenting the other girl. And I thought it was an interesting movie. I definitely can see those three labels in it, the horror comedy drama,

because I think it was a good mixture of it. And a lot of sexy time in here. So it's not for the kids. So, all right, I got you then. Nina forever, but, not with the young ones then. Yeah, I think Shudder or AMC Plus. All right.

Well, again, it sounds vaguely familiar, but if I did see it, I don't remember it too much, but that subplot seems to make sense. Yeah, it sounds familiar. I think when it came out, there was a lot to talk about it. I think it was a few years ago, though.

Maybe I'd just heard about it then. All right. Your next one. My next one, I went really fucking trippy, dude. Have you ever heard of the Japanese movie House or Housou? Yes, it is actually on my list because I've heard a lot of crazy shit about it. I'm saying absolutely nothing about it then, ma'am. I'll tell you in the very first scene, you get,

what is up with this Japanese fascination with school girls in school uniforms? I couldn't tell you. It seems to pop up in a lot of movies. It does strike me as a bit creepy. But that being said, you know, this movie has influenced a lot of haunted house movies that we've seen that sort of have a mixture of comedy. And, you know, I guess sort of like a mixture of comedy. I want to say comedy and horror, but it's hard to even really call it horror. because there's some, you know, kind of horrific images,

but they're all done completely tongue-in-cheek. I don't know, man. It may have influenced the Evil Dead a little bit. I don't know. It's kind of hard to describe. You just got to see it. I'm not going to say anything else. It is streaming on HBO Max.

Oh, nice. Then, yep, we'll table it for next time, then, because I'm throwing it on the list. All right. All right, my next one, and I believe, no, not that one. That is another movie that might make my bottom 10. And that is Burial Ground Massacre. Bottom 10, huh?

I don't want to spend a whole bunch of time talking about this. All I'm really going to say is I didn't know Michael Madsen was Native American. Oh, no. Are you kidding me? Lance, this movie was so fucking... Basically, this guy, he's kind of... He's supposed to be Native American, I'm assuming. Okay.

But while he's killing people, because he's trying to get an artifact back, and these kind of rich people own it, they kind of built their house on a sacred Native American land. and they and they kept some of the artifacts kind of as like you know on their in their office on a shelf kind of like mementos or souvenirs or whatever so

and the parents leave and the teenage he's supposed to be teenage son has friends over and they're partying and basically they just all get picked off one by one he's trying to get this ring back while he has the mask on it's a completely different person playing the killer. I had to look it up. I'm not too familiar with the guy. He's a, he's a wrestler.

Because I'm, I'm watching the guy move around, and I'm like, you're not built like, that ain't, that ain't Michael Manson. You look like you're kind of built. Like, you can, like, really, like, take somebody on. And the only time Michael Madsen's doing the voiceover as the guy is talking. And then at the end, he takes his mask off and it's Michael Madsen and you see the body type. You're like, oh, that really is Michael Madsen. Oh,

but. Oh my God. Does this have shades of that Kevin Bacon movie, the very first one we ever reviewed? I'd rather watch that one than this again. You've got to be kidding me. That one. I almost have to watch this then.

Okay, burial ground massacre. Yeah. It's out there. Huh. It's complete. I'm not. nonsense and it's already Lance I looked it out

they've already filmed a sequel and not only Michael Madsen returns but they got Tom Seismore on the cast. I thought he was dead. I thought he died of a drug overdose or something. Well they must have revived him for this role because

I almost want to watch the sequel just because I'm not trying to make fun to anybody but it just kind of seems like Michael Madison and Tom Seismore kind of train now and for them to be in the same movie together. I may have to watch this, dude. I may have to watch this.

If it's that bad, I may just have to watch it. If we did a commentary on it, we would just be laughing and ripping this movie apart. Hmm. Well, okay. Well, let's, I'm not counting it out, man. I'm not counting it out. But I think for the sheer ridiculousness of it, it is in my top 10 as of right now or bottom 10 as a bottom.

Oh, top 10, okay. Sorry. Not top 10. I lost my mind for a second. So we're going to round it out tonight. That was your number 22, right? Yes, sir. All right.

So mine was a movie that I thought was going to, I thought I was going to enjoy it a lot more than I did because I loved the premise. It's these evil trick-or-treaters. And it's called Hellions. Have you seen it? No, heard of it, though. It's unsuttered, but don't waste your time. We're not closing this episode out good, are we?

Nah, it's not. It's not good, man. I don't think it would have been a bottom 10. I came out a couple of years ago. It wouldn't have been a bottom 10, but it's just very meh. And, man, all the things that these kids could have done to make it, you know, kind of like, not really a horror comedy, but at least added some personality to it. Instead, you've got this terrible, I don't know, man, some sort of a supernatural

storyline, but they don't really explain to you what's supernatural about it or why the kids are supernatural. It doesn't make a lot of sense, man. I would pass on Hellions. All right. Let's hope for better luck when we talk next week, man. Yeah, because my next one is. I kind of spoil it now.

We did an interview with the lovely Deborah Boyhees. Yes, yes. Her movie. Yep, came out, and that'll be the next one on the next episode I talk about. Looking forward to hearing about that. So I guess until our next 31 days continues, well, good day, good night or whatever, right? No.