The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 149- Saturdaycast: ORDERING ICE CREAM

Episode Date: January 31, 2021

Happy Saturday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic

Hey guys, happy Saturday. It's episode 149. Welcome back to the show. Hey guys, what's up? It's Jacqueline. Happy Saturday. Welcome back to the show. Happy weekend. If you're new, hit that subscribe button. I'm here seven days a week. No questions. Please don't ask. I'm here seven days a week. Please subscribe. This episode is going to be not what she expected. This is not a Q&A. Every Saturday I do a Q&A. Not this Saturday because I'm going to deep dive into a document I want to read from stuff I wrote on, um, my Google. I have this, like, I don't know how many pages it is. This Google doc of all the shit I've ever written since I was like 18. I've, I compiled it

a couple of years ago and I thought I'd read stuff off of it today. Um, I don't know. I'm curious. I kind of like forgot what's on there and I haven't revisited it since like last summer. And cause one of my goals right now, I want to start writing more again. Um, I don't know. It's something that I do usually late at night just like get in my feels or I sit and I think I will literally spiral in thought and then I have to release it through writing like I don't I don't know why I'm that way but um okay what the fuck first thing I wrote on here I want to be a treasure a treasure I want to be a treasure slash America's sweetheart okay this took a turn this just took a turn I wrote underneath that why not lol dude you guys are seeing how okay am I self-absorbed

am I full of shit what just happened what did I just read I blacked out when what why did I write that let me put myself back last probably wrote that when I was in depression last summer I want to be a treasure I want to be a treasure slash America's sweetheart um that's a bold thing to write that's a truth bomb honestly like anything I write right on here is a straight up from the soul something I want for myself a truth and I'm exposing like I have I have my pants down I have everything hanging out right now telling everyone on the internet at some point in my life I wrote I want to be America's sweetheart um you know and I also I've kind of joked about how I want to become a household name similar to the presidents in the past you know the abe lincolns

of the world everyone if you hear abe lincoln you know he's on that penny he was was he the fuck was he the second president third president fourth fuck he was the president everyone would know abraham lincoln when you say hitler immediately people don't know who that is when people hear my first name jacqueline i want them to think of me selfishly like i know i talked about yesterday how uh or the day before I was like fame fucking scares me I literally am terrified of it at the same time when people hear Jacqueline I want them to think of me someone do the math how does that add up why am I that way why am I that way in fact I like the idea of not even needing a last name and I'm just Jacqueline and in fact there's a reason why okay I'll be

fucking honest right now excuse my language um I was named after Jacqueline Kennedy okay my last name is Monroe it's kind of odd how that's you know like Marilyn Monroe JFK Jackie Kennedy JFK like I don't know so that's just there that's why my name is my name now you know but I don't know that like what is there a job is there you know how like okay there is a like who has a first name like uh Lady Gaga or that's fucking dumb um who's got like a one name and why I think I'm inspired by an episode of something I just listened to about this first name thing fuck what was I listening to you guys know I listen to so many podcasts but anyways my point is Jacqueline isn't a like it's not like a world famous person is Jacqueline

and everyone's like oh it's like Beyonce so I want my fucking name to be like Beyonce anyways um I just okay I'm putting on the confidence robe tonight I just want to pump myself up I want to think really highly of myself and puff my chest and be like you're the shit you should become a household name you've got what it takes let's share this with the world let's be really vulnerable and take our and pull our pants down and say hi I want to be America's sweetheart. And you know what? My name's Jacqueline. Don't forget it. Fuck in. Let's move on. How can I solve someone's problems with my podcast? I must have written this in September. Is this dated? How can I solve someone's problems with my podcast? I wrote.

Y'all answer that in a DM. Shoot me a DM. How can I solve your problems? I mean, here's where I'm at with it this is all I can really this is what I always go back to I have followed people on the internet my dog is literally peeing in front of me right now I'm oh my god guys this is a train wreck he's peeing on the carpet I'm gonna have to burn this carpet it's probably gonna like go off like a bomb though with all the piss on it it's gonna what what happens if you like pee on a fire doesn't it go up doesn't don't the flames grow like 10 feet. Fuck dude, this is real life. I'm a new mom. I have a nine week old golden retriever. His name is Jimmy Dean, little Jimmy. And he just pissed on my carpet. Now let's move on.

How can I solve someone's problems with my podcast? Here's where I'm at. I've been following people on the internet religiously, like the same people since like seventh grade. And I know what it's like to listen or watch someone's YouTube or listen to their podcast over a long period of time and really get to know who they are and you feel like this cool internet connection with them and they help you get through your hard days and you always look forward to their new content and they're it's a fun kind of nonsense thing you tune into and it it's kind of a nice little you know if you just need some downtime end of the day mindless content you go to these people like I personally go to these people time after time after time so to answer the how can I solve

someone's problems with my podcast I'm not getting on here saying hey drink this juice take these vitamins do this exercise like be like I'm not giving you a formula like that of how I can solve your problems I just assume you guys are all fucking obese and need some dietary and uh fitness advice kidding um I'm projecting because I feel like a fat fuck right now because it's Saturday and I'm having ice cream and uh there you go so honesty um anyways so I'm not very I don't get specific here I don't come here with this like a there's never a theme like today I'm gonna solve for this entire series of my show I'm going to help people with this problem in their life I don't have that I don't I don't want to do that personally that that would

drive me insane like to stick to one topic and be boxed in like that couldn't do it never I just have no interest personally and as you guys know I don't do shit I don't want to do so let's move on I'm solving your problems by simply being here seven days a week and I'm a source of escape entertainment fucking whatever you need here I am let me know in a dm what do you what do you need my help with how can I be of service to you shoot me a dm let me know okay whoa why are humans materialistic nice stuff makes quality of life better you need money to buy stuff hard work leadership is rewarded with money money buys you stuff what in the hell did i just write why are humans materialistic

like oh fuck oh fuck okay so stuff materialistic goods and things help your quality of life like if you have a roof over your head a nice bed to sleep in for for me like a dog to pet that makes you feel nice you know and loved and you know I don't have a roommate so it's nice to have another soul around me you know um you have food in your fridge like that makes your life better so you need money to buy stuff I wrote money but well I don't know guys I was probably it's probably a 2 a.m fucking thought I got up and wrote on this I have it so I have my docs google docs document or app on my phone I just like write on that shit I haven't done it in a minute I think I I wrote I mean because obviously I talked about the podcast probably in September

think from first principles problems solution dash solutions dash what didn't work in the past dash how do we fix it it's probably some fucking uh eric weinstein weens i don't how do you say his name probably some some podcast i listened to with him saying something about first principles and i got all inspired problem solutions see that is something i do differently now as a sophisticated young 26 year old that, um, is a grown ass woman. Okay. I literally, I have no time for bullshit anymore. Like I, I literally just don't, I'm literally just don't have time for bullshit, but I hate riffraff. I hate small talk and conversations and bickering and fighting over nonsense and

like, I hate it at this point. I'm like, okay, what is the problem? All right. This is the problem. All right. How do we fix it? What's the solution? I talk about solutions so much now with everything, anything like any argument I'm in. And like, I'm just like, I don't want this to keep happening. How do we fix it? Let's get to that because that's, what's going to move the needle forward here and get us to a better place, the solution and how we're, how we're, how we're going to get there to sit and, you know, spin in circles and tip, tip dance and tip toe and tap dance around the fucking problem the whole time it just makes you emotional it keeps you upset the solution is the inspiring part that I feel like makes both parties uh it puts them at ease

and makes them a little happier about the situation like hey we're on the same page we got a problem here and let's fucking fix it all right so okay dog is eating my microphone cord please do not pause thank you go and eat a treat here's a treat I just have them like loaded in my fucking pocket so whenever he's being rambunctious i can just pacify him dude why don't puppies wear pacifiers like babies that'd be so cute get my slipper he loves eating my slipper because i probably step on all his dog shit and then on the rug either remnants or the and he liked he likes to smell his own shit okay so you guys i'm only at the tippy top of this how many how many pages this is like fucking like 500 pages dude okay i'm gonna like put you know like hansel and gretel

how they put the breadcrumbs out. I'm going to like do that on my floor. So he has to like find the breadcrumbs in a trail and occupy himself. Okay. So, oh, I wrote a stream of consciousness that is taking up with no breaks, no paragraph indents. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, 11 pages of straight writing and I'm reading the first part of it I already know what this is about I do remember writing this and it is way too um it's too much it's it's like okay you can I know I'm taking my pants down sharing some uh vulnerable honest shit right now but I will there are some things I do keep to myself believe it or not for men currency is currency for women beauty is currency fuck dude that's that ain't that ain't the truth

I think I've written that I've talked about this before beauty standards I wrote this in 2019 are correlated with income level the more money you have the more beautiful you are yeah okay we all know because of like the new beauty standards everyone's doing stuff to their face and you know all these alterations it's like you literally can't do that if you're fucking broke like you can't go get your botox and your injections in your in your face and your contouring and you're like literally people are getting jaw lines by like freezing the fat and like it's insane like the amount of stuff you can do like you can literally be pretty you can be the most beautiful person in the world if you have like I feel like you need about 50 g's to do it

all like ass tits like or uh what is it cold cool school like the tummy freezing like you know what's kind of weird okay do you notice like how and i dude i am not fucking body shaming i don't care like i literally have no judgment over anyone that does stuff to their to alter themselves like i think it's awesome do whatever like i don't care i'm just making a comment on how like if you're poor you can't look that hot ever it's just not gonna happen you're gonna wrinkle okay you're not gonna be able to afford Botox and you're gonna look like a witch and that's it but do you guys ever notice how like there's I feel like there's a there's something being done on like okay every girl I know has a little like on your stomach has a little you know it's probably

fucking photoshop I'm thinking of how you know how you see people with like insane curves and then their stomachs are just straight as fuck like no little bump on the tummy like no it's just like straight down but yet they're so voluptuous everywhere else like how is that is that is that a cool sculpting is that what that is where they freeze like they you sit in the thing and then it freezes your tummy I feel like that's what's changing like I feel like a lot of people are getting that done and it almost looks it's like it doesn't look real because you're like so tight and it doesn't make sense and these are all the people that are fucking eating chick-fil-a and always eating like shit that you could never eat if you had that leanness and that tightness okay

anyways I just you know what again I'm eating ice cream tonight I feel like talk I feel you know what am I am I um it's probably because I'm feeling like a fat ass I have to comment on people that have nice bodies and say shit about it so um I don't care that you're rich you corny little bitch I wrote um corny I wrote that in all caps it's a word I like to use now I did write that for a purpose I think that's a um what's his face bronco always tired tats on the face post malone i think he says that in a song i don't care or no or is it um no it's not him gashy whatever let me google it just let me google the line i don't care that you're richy corny little bitch i like so i love the word corny

my favorite okay gashi geishi gashi dis oh disrespectful uh i love that song fuck that's such a good song i forgot about it disrespect me and i'm real disrespectful get the fuck out of my face i'm posting up with my click we ain't never flinch credit card work the wrist lebron with the chip all this sauce made a slip when I walk I drip we don't care that you rich you corny little bitch I start I started all the vibes started all the waves could have made it to my country took it to the states I'm feeling like I'm ace given all the fades hit and run they starving taking pics of my plates moving it okay cool so disrespectful goshy I wrote that down I don't care that you're rich okay so my favorite descriptor words description words of people

and their like vibe if I'm just like fucking annoyed and just like I sense fakeness is I love saying that person is phony I don't like to say fake so much I feel like fakes overuse I just like to call people phony and corny like it's like like it's the people that are so like um and they're dweeby they're kind of like okay I know I'm sounding judgmental but I'm selling it or I'm sending it here on this episode I'm saying a lot of vulnerable honest shit I'm telling you guys how I describe people that are fake as fuck they're like so just oh fuck what's like it has to do with the things they talk about and how they're so sold on these things and I can't I'm trying to put my finger on something and it's a good example like oh I don't know it's usually

around like fucking wellness brands and like these are people that are just so like do we fucking like in deep I don't know how to describe it i don't know it's usually so i guess i'll that was a weird uh tangent but it's like they're playing an act that they think this is like gonna they it's like very wholesome and good to do these things and they're gonna talk about it and they're gonna show it off and they're gonna fucking never use plastic and they're gonna i don't know it's just fucking phony to me anyways I'm the quarterback of quarantine I've said that a few times I wrote that down I like that I was gonna do an Instagram post of that I was gonna sit on the fucking couch

of the football and say I'm the quarterback of quarantine never took that pic dude I have literally like a thousand pages I know I said 500 it's probably more than that I could actually tell you exactly but I'm just fucking around I could be here for six hours and read all this you don't put a saddle on a mustang that's an mj fucking last dance quote i wrote down he says yeah there's no i in team but there's an i and win michael jordan everyone with the bangers the quotes from the last dance i mean that if that says that might say a lot about me and i'm just feeling cool right now again i'm trying to you know be a household name fucking america's sweetheart dude the fact i'm like watching the last dance taking notes and

writing down quotes like i'm just so cool also like remember what i said was it yesterday i'm like no no no dude do you remember for the kanye west episode on rogan i literally took like six pages of handwritten notes the entire podcast and then 30 minutes after it ended i had already recorded my fucking um I'm still dropping crumbs like this kid's gonna be so fat in the morning I'm just feeding him I'm putting these uh pieces of kibble all over the floor follow the noise it's dark um yeah I like posted a uh what's it called a um shit a recap an analysis of how I thought it all went down and my take on Connie West and okay so yeah you know I'm a podcaster and I'll own it I'm a podcaster and I'll own it um not gonna lie my delivery is gonna be here in

like they're arriving mom isn't gonna like this yes mom I spent money on ice cream delivery tonight because I have a puppy and I can't go to the fucking grocery store because here I literally googled can you go to the grocery store with a puppy and in California like I swear I see people dogs in the stores all the time but like I could like hide him in my hoodie I don't know technically it's a service animal thing only and uh I'm terrified of leaving him in my car like I could have ran in Vaughn's for literally it would take me maybe a round trip checking out like less than five minutes and he would have sat in the front seat maybe peed uh probably yeah probably would pee and cry a little bit and then he'd be fine and then I'd be in the car with my ice cream I

wouldn't have to pay fucking five dollars or however much it takes to get actually was delivery free yeah it's sad so I don't know do you guys do that on the weekends like you have a little something something that's like oh it's the weekend I'm having ice cream like I'm doing that tonight I don't give a fuck so I'm talking fast um you don't put a saddle on the Mustang dude are they here I'm gonna show up I literally don't care I'm gonna like open my door and uh be podcasting while I receive it just like out in the city with my laptop and my headset on I told my neighbor yesterday I ran into my neighbor and uh like I was bringing my puppy inside and we like ran into each other at the door and I literally have never talked to her in my

life and we were talking about our jobs and like what we do because I was curious you know I like never talked to her so I was like yeah I work in PR I work for you know I work remote here for company and tell her where it's at so the fact that I'm like actually like I'm a podcast host and that, you know, and I have that job. It's funny how like now I'm going to go outside to get my DoorDash order. Uh, was it Postmates or DoorDash? Do you guys ever cross compare to see prices and see like how much you could save with one of the apps? It's like fucking like a dollar difference. Uh, dude, I'm all about that. Uh, conserving, conserving my money or whatever it's called. Uh, pinching my pennies, you know, dude, there's no, there's no way I'm getting a new car.

I was thinking about it. So, you know how I talked about Post Malone driving a Bronco. I kind of like the idea of driving an old fucking, like my car is a Chevy make. It's probably bad. I just revealed that for stalkers, for stalking purposes, but I drive a fucking Chevy made like my car is a Chevy. I'm not going to tell you what kind, but I kind of am into like, okay, no car payment, drive a piece of shit. It's like old looking and kind of like, I don't know. It's a vibe. I don't know. It's kind of a vibe. So I'm saying if my neighbor walks out the door right now and all of a sudden I'm fucking podcasting and I saw her yesterday. Yeah. We're for a PR company. I'm on a zoom call right now. I'm just going to tell this DoorDash person I'm on a zoom call. Actually, no, I'm not. Do you

guys might, you guys might hear this. Oh, it just got picked up. Anyways. Um, and no, I didn't get fucking halo top. I didn't get some like low-cal, you know, vegan shit. I got the real thing. Dude, just eat the real thing, you know? Tastes better. So I'm happy because I don't mind what happens. Good or bad, it is what it is. Dude, that's it. Let's all sit in that, sit in that, uh, sit with that idea right now. I'm happy because I don't mind what happens. Good or bad. It is what it is. I don't know what, I wish this was dated. Damn it. I'm just scrolling, reading shit.

Yeah, that's it. So like, if you're, it's all about like being emotionally stable. they're like it's all about being it's like a fucking navy seal i don't know like that i feel like military dudes are just like they're not they're so like they have the ability to settle their minds in chaos so they can execute on their missions and do their fucking job without getting you know like so they can survive it and so I feel like if you kind of bring that mental discipline into other areas in your life like we can all adopt or we can all adapt or fucking apply that excuse me I knew it was an a word apply then you can roll the punches better

and you can go it is what it is hey I got an offender bender event fuck I got an offender bender this morning on the freeway I'm just using this as an example and god damn it now I gotta pay a bunch of money and fix my car and it was my fault and like fix the other person's car and I don't have insurance and I'm fucked so then you're just like okay you could literally spiral into fucking rage tear shit up with every other person you encounter that day or you can do what I talked about earlier and go, okay, I can't take this back. This happened. There's nothing I can do about it. I fucked up. I'd gotten to, I got into a fender bender. It's going to cost a lot of money and I got to fix it. So literally if your brain can go from, oh fuck, to what's the solution

and then just start working on that solution and only focus on that, it's going to be so much easier to get through I think the bullshit we do in between all the like sulking and the oh you know it sucks oh my god my life is over everything's fucked I hate it oh you know just like sit and spiral dude those people stay down in life they stay down they don't move forward they it's what my mom she just like constantly says like my whole life she's like you gotta recover quickly you gotta recover quickly the ability to recover quickly separates the fucking sheep from the wolves in this world and that is it I'm happy because I don't mind what happens good or bad it is what it is

dude is my fucking ice cream here I wonder if you can see my led lights from outside I need a beverage I need to drink some water um guys how do i go grocery shopping with a puppy can someone dm me what do you recommend or what do you do do you just leave it in the car i had to put my antlers up high my uh puppy was are these like i don't know it's probably deer no those are too big to be deer antlers they're like a decor item you put in your house They're like gold plated, but fake gold. It's just like they're gold sprayed antlers that are

really cool. And, um, Jimmy thinks it's a giant fucking bone and is he's destroyed one of the antlers around the little points on it. So I'm, I'm starting to look around and I'm annoyed because as you know, I told, I told myself last year, or I like finally realized that millennials are boring as fuck the middle of minimalism thing needs to go clutter is in surround yourself with clutter and shit and be in like relax in it and relax just like my issue was always like I was so OCD about oh my god there's like too much clutter too many tchotchkes I gotta put it all away minimal minimal minimal right so I finally released that and I was like fuck it I just want to I want to have like a I want to I want to clutter the fuck up I want to like put

stuff around me that I like and try to live with sanity sanity again around it because can anyone relate to that I feel like everything you see on the internet aesthetic wise is like or like home aesthetic wise is so minimal and clean and soothing and zen and no clutter and I just want to feel like I'm at my fucking like aunt's house or like my mom's house or my grandma's house and there's like cool cool there's like cute cool shit around me books and fucking pictures and magazines and like stacks of newspapers and fucking I don't know so basically what I'm saying is Jimmy has now forced me to put all my clutter away because he eats it so I no longer have cool cute little shit around me it's all fucking on the shelf put away in storage I feel

like we're gonna have to go for probably the first year like this for six months until he settles down I keep dropping him treats guys he's gonna be so fat in the morning it's bad for his is this bad for his um health I'm giving him his dinner one piece at a time I think they're here dude this is why I'm going to fucking big leagues who what other podcasts are out there again I'm putting on my confidence cloak I'm putting on my confidence cloak I'm just sorry to repeat that because I kind of had a throat bubble um I'm putting on my confidence cloak tonight and I know this is the polar opposite of what I said yesterday again please someone someone out there please do that equation do the math dissect me figure out why I am this way but understand that I feel like

the reason why I will be a household name is for exactly what I'm about to do I am a podcast host and I'm going to answer the door and receive a package from my door dasher and uh just right on the podcast okay we're not doing it there's no topic today I'm not solving your problems I'm not attempting to add any value to your life at all I'm not even trying okay but it's happening and you know it because you're still listening and you're having fun and you're curious you are curious what did she order and where did she get it from we're gonna reveal that as soon as they arrive. Dude, I'm a tease. I'm a tease. I know. Okay. So that was water. Don't worry. Dude, where are they at? What's his name? I like seeing what my Dasher's name is.

Eric. Oh fuck. He's probably hot. Erics are usually hot. Eric is approaching. Should I put on my sunglasses and kind of freak him out? Dude, I'm going to do it. No, I'm going to put on my nerd glasses. Then I look like a sexy school teacher. Doing a Zoom, air quotes, Zoom, or no, winky face, Zoom meeting. Dude, 2020 changed me. 2020 changed me.

Is he on a bike? Oh, God damn. Okay. Okay. Okay. He's not here yet, but, um, tell me why there's like a, I'm going to put him at 56 years old. This guy on a bike with a face shield on and a mask, like a surgical mask on his face. It's dark out. Okay. It's dark out. You're in fresh air. You know, he's like a fucking shield. Like, you know, the clear plastic shields people are wearing yeah he's he's rocking that out in the city on his bike okay he's my dasher he's my dasher he's my dash what the fuck he's actually this man has my ice cream okay hold on hold on jimmy sit hey no Hi. Hello. Sorry. I'm podcasting. Thank you. You too.

Shit. I'm mad at myself. That was an opportunity for small talk. You guys wanted it. You probably wanted it and I didn't provide it. I'm sorry, but I feel really bad for him. He's on a bike fuck me dude I just made fun of him and then he got he was actually my dasher fuck he can't did he hear me where my window's open okay oh my god guys I feel bad for him fuck dude can I change his tip can you do that after they deliver it fuck me dude I feel bad this man on a bike I just my fat ass need fucking ice cream tonight and this man on a bike I just made fun of for wearing a shield and a mask he's doing that because he's a dasher and it's the law he has to protect himself and fuck jimmy

we're doing the rope dragging him around on the rope you know that's part of the job you got to wear the protection so i feel bad i made fun of him it's just like how is this like you know what everybody likes his job i feel like uh what are they called gig workers like what they do you know they're on their own schedule they you know it's like a nice gig it's a they're gig workers for it's a good gig Jimmy is destroying my yoga pants dude okay I don't know how to parent and podcast at the same time listen to this you can do it do you guys hear that I don't know if you could he's doing his uh nightly what is what do you call it puppies go crazy at night because usually they're overly tired and they put on a little tantrum like kids do. So you would think

you need to tire them out, but what you actually have to do is ignore them. So like last night I fucked up. He was squealing. He acted possessed and like freaking, he was freaking out, running around, crying and like he was squealing, right? So I'm like, he just needs to play, right? Burn off some energy. That was actually, I was exasperating the issue. So, okay. I shouldn't walk and talk. This is the thing. I'm mobile podcasting tonight. Fuck. Okay. Let me like describe what I ordered. So my local 7-Eleven has a great brand, their own brand of ice cream. Um, oh damn. I forgot I ordered this kind. so 7-7-11 okay let's not be a hater right now okay let's not fat shame me 7-11 uh has great

ice cream okay seven select ice cream that's their brand seven select you know they have knockoff like oreos seven select fucking snacks all over 7-11 okay listen to me when I say this I feel like a California babe every time I go to 7-11 it doesn't make sense I don't understand why but there's something about 7-Eleven in California that when I came here, I was like, because I don't really have a lot in Washington, Washington. I was like, this is kind of a vibe. I don't know. It's like, I just want to be like on my roller skates, going and grabbing a fucking push pop, like a Red Bull and like, you know, go to the beach, go to 7-Eleven. I don't know. So I've been I've got I go to 7-eleven a lot there happens to be one like walking distance from me

now please again no fat shaming no like lazy shaming I have a puppy I don't know how I go into 7-eleven with a dog in my arms I can't leave him outside I don't fucking know what to do I'm helpless I want ice cream okay so I go to 7-eleven quite frequently the place I used to work have one next door and I would go there and grab like a kombucha because they have like good snacks there and you know like a fucking couple hard-boiled eggs uh maybe a greek yogurt you know something like cool and like healthy and like not um the fucking taquitos on the hot bar like i wasn't eating that shit at 7-eleven i was buying like the you know fucking just you know bikini babe snacks Okay. So let's cut to the chase. What did she order? So 7-Eleven, seven select ice cream is

great. And how did I start? How did I find this flavor? I don't know. It's been a while. I've had this a couple of times. It reminds me of something I ate ice cream wise as a child. Cause you know, as a kid, it's like Sunday, we're going to the pool as a family. You know, we'd have a pool day we go to this uh health club right as a family and then after we went there we go grab a pizza go to the no we'd first grab a movie let me collect myself I apologize for the heavy breathing um it's the walking and talking sorry so we go to this we go to the health club we go swimming we would go to the uh video depot it used to be called video depot it was like a a local video store and at the time it was mostly vhs's but there were also dvds we always picked

out like we each got to pick out a dvd a fucking vhs and we go home and watch it and we grab a pizza and ice cream but i feel like the ice cream i got reminds me of something i grew up with so that's probably why i like it so um by the way dude i didn't mention this when did i list off my favorite movies I think I listed like my 10 the 10 movies I grew up on I think I did that a few days ago a couple days ago I don't know I do this every day I forget but I forgot one and the movie is The Parent Trap The Parent Trap with Lindsay Lohan I forgot about how many times I watched that that movie like shaped me who I was as a young woman like I want like I don't know I just loved that whole camp vibe because I went to summer camp and they went to summer camp and

they were, you know, there was the, um, the London element in it. You know, one of the twins was from London. Oh, Jimmy. Fuck. Sorry. Live parenting. Okay. We're going to go grab kibble. Let's get kibble. Kibble. So yeah, that's a movie I forgot to mention. So anyways, the ice cream I get is called I'm literally in my storage closet getting food god damn it guys he's gonna be so fat in the morning dude Jimmy it's cheat day just who gives a fuck all right so um he's he's very very hungry I know it's past his oh fuck you know I'm just gonna feed him hey so let me just tell you the flavor it's taking me 10 minutes to tell you the flavor I get fudge tracks fudge tracks

it's good I don't know 7-eleven fudge tracks get it it's fucking good um I don't know all right so I need to feed him because it's like oh by the way by the way it's literally 7-eleven right now you know how you're talking about 7-eleven or you talk about something you see some like the universe was listening shit. I fucking looked at my oven light or oven timer that says 7-Eleven while I'm talking about 7-Eleven. So, oh, also, oh dude, I can't say it. I'll reveal too much and I'll get my feels. Do you guys like associate numbers with Boise Lake? Are you guys numbers people? I'm a numbers bitch and not in an astrology way, not in a like oh I know about what they mean none of that it's literally like if I find out your

birthday and I see that shit in numbers anywhere I'm like it's a sign it's a sign there's a meaning we're meant to be yeah I know I know again my pants are down I'm exposing myself hey wait we we got to sit first. Oh, fuck it. You know what? And you're got, you got to go in the crate. Crate. Two feet in. He sits, he goes two feet out. And what I do is I lock him in when he eats. Then I make this a fun time. This is his play. He's at the McDonald's play place right now, basically eating his food, but he's got to get used to the crate. Right? So I try to do things that are positive around it like feed them in there give them treats in there anyways so what did I just say about numbers dude I'm so fucking annoying tonight so yeah like if I find your if I

find out your birthday dude game over I'm just like oh my god I saw that digital clock it has the it said your birthday or like for example guys this is so fucking dumb I don't care I'm telling my life story this is gonna be funny to look back on someday if it all works out literally my like my day one of podcasting stats are someone in my past so fuck god damn it why am I going here why am I doing this why am I really being this is the word expository I am being this like I'm not keeping any secrets from you guys I'm just being like completely like I this is fucking embarrassing my day one stats are a birthday that's a very I do think about this person fucking

quite frequently and you know do you guys have those people in your life you're like why do they keep coming back around why am I thinking about them what's happening what do I do in fact I have a IG bestie you know someone I don't know personally but they're like an Instagram friend who's like if you don't tell this person how you feel this year like it's never gonna happen like you have to do it and I'm just like nope can't do it won't do it whoever what's the fucking like quote about how like whoever cares the least holds the power like and I know you guys are like Jacqueline you're 26 stop playing games but like there's something to be said about like I okay I'll just be honest where was I at I was reading my document dude I just got so off

track so like I currently have a situation where there is a man who is overly excited to the point where, like, this is what's fucked up about me. This is so, I don't know if this is just, uh, psychology. Um, uh, is this a, what's it called? Like DNA, uh, what's, what's the word I'm looking for here? Is this just human nature, how I'm designed, how the mind works when you okay okay okay I like when someone isn't overbearing about their interest in me I like to constantly go I I kind of like to not fully know does that make sense like I like to think that I like a little mystery there I don't like it to be hi I think you're cute I want to get to know you let's fire this cannon let's start dating let's start doing this I like time

I like a dance I like a I like a um I like to evaluate this like I don't know I'm not a I'm a slow bitch when it comes to dating and like getting to know people but why am I saying this So, for example, there's someone currently who's just like, like, it's too much. It's too, like, I want to see you. I want to hang out with you. Like, and that's like a turnoff to me. Like, I don't, I just want someone to just not even, what do I want? Okay, so first of all, guys, this is advice.

if you like a girl, tap in, tap out, tap in, tap out. Don't tap in and stay in. Does that make sense? Same goes for girls. I feel like if you like a guy, don't keep tapping in, don't keep tapping in. There's gotta be a dance. They have to reciprocate. If it's not happening, that's a sign they're probably not interested or they're not feeling it. You literally can't just, and I don't, and I feel like this is for people that if they're constantly being badgered and communicated with and like is this be am I into is this like a toxic way to date or just way to do things I don't know um maybe the person that's meant to be with me is just gonna be like a constant tap in and I'm not annoyed by it but in my experience like the people that I like I end up the people I can't

stop thinking about are the ones that I'm like they're interested they show interest and they pull away they show interest and they pull away they show interest and they pull away I like that because it gives me I don't know what it is it like gives you time to I don't know what is that what is that psychology oh no oh no honey okay guys guys guys god damn it guess what Jimmy's doing yeah okay yeah he ate food and immediately shit so this has been an interesting Saturday night he peed and he shit guys this carpet so the good news is if I immediately throw I'm just I'm just gonna take care of right now I'm supposed to scold him I'm supposed to immediately take him outside

dude I podcast seven days a week I can't uh cut the cord right now and pause this and go parent I know that's irresponsible but I'm just gonna flush the fucking turd down and keep pushing buddy keep pushing he's got a couple more stragglers coming out afterwards this is called new mom life and I think it's good for me because when you love your kid you will do anything for them you will clean their shit you will like it doesn't matter what they do you'll deal with it right you don't have a choice like I'm not just gonna leave this on the floor right now I'm gonna immediately pick it up it's wild how like you're not even like mad at them you're just like okay so we haven't fully learned how

to properly relieve ourselves and you didn't go to the door like he's been doing this like he'll go to the door if he needs to um go outside to pee or poop but he just he he's probably a little bit scared of me on this microphone and got nervous so fresh shit going down the toilet what did I say on um there's like a podcast a few weeks ago or not a few days ago excuse me and I was like my goal this week is for my son to never take a shit in my apartment ever and just like I think he's too full because he just went again guys I think I overfed him I feel bad now because I had to give him all those pieces of kibble to keep him occupied I'm bad I'm just not you know what it's not like um so eventually it's going to become effortless you know this whole

like have a dog raise it teach it how to go to the bathroom outside like it's all going to be effortless and like breathing but it's currently not and I'm learning so I just I know this is probably appalling and really tacky like I'm literally cleaning up more shit I'm going to flush it again, but just know I'm new at this. Okay. And there's definitely speaking of speaking of, um, kind of like getting in the rhythm of all this, there's definitely a learning curve to podcasting around my dog and trying to like manage him in a you know in a good way while I do this okay so where was I at um I was talking about boys I was talking about like not being too forward I guess it's kind of weird how I'm like that I feel like a lot of people when I talked to my

friends and shit they're like yeah I'm the same way it's like a turnoff if they're like too obsessed with you too soon and they're too like they're too excited so dude I forgot where I was at why did I even talk about that well this is all I'm gonna like work backwards what was the quote um I think the last one was I'm happy because I don't mind what happens good or bad it is what it is okay it definitely wasn't that uh fuck okay how did I get here oh I went to okay I got my ice cream delivered um fudge track 7-eleven oh I saw 7-eleven on the oven then I said I'm crazy about like if I know your birthday and I see it it's gonna it's gonna be a sign and I think it's you know it means something like and then I started talking about boys and how because a certain

number I was thinking of happened to be my stats on the first episode I'm like I think about this person a lot and the reason I think about them is because they tap in tap out I don't really know where they're at or where it's ever gonna go yet currently there's someone who's overbearing and that doesn't work for me so let's get back to the the page here um dude I feel really bad for my dog if he's like too full I only gave him maybe like 15 pieces of kibble and then I gave him his dinner but I finally weaned him off chicken just know he's eating dry food only he's not eating any more chicken he had his last chicken this morning because I've been slowly taking less so while he had a stomach issues the only way I could feed him his medicine was through a piece of chicken

and so I'd like you know make him sit first he's actually pro at that I'd like to say sit give him give him his chicken and he'd eat it but over the last week i've slowly taken out of his dog food i was wetting his food too so i stopped wetting his food this morning gave him chicken now he just has straight up dry kibble and he ate it all so fucking thank you purina pro plan puppy chow for making a great product my dog loves it life is about nuance I wrote okay I don't know where I was going with that I just have a line here this is life is about nuance oh let's get back to

if any woman could steal a man away from me I wouldn't I wouldn't want him anyways whoa oh fuck oh shit yes okay girls did you just hear what I said if any woman could steal a man away from me I wouldn't want him anyways meaning if a man was so enticed by another woman that he leaves you and cheats on you and like steals you steals him away from you you wouldn't even want him anyways right is that what that means speaking of I don't want someone obsessed with me too soon like what is it it's like you know when you're in kindergarten and you're the boys are teasing you because they like you I feel like that shit never ends like it not in a

mean way but I like I don't know I feel like this has to do with building the passion and the connection with someone like you there's got to be this like magnet happening and sometimes that magnet flips around and pushes away and then sometimes it flips over and it comes back but it's not constantly going because I think that there's an element of surprise and excitement and it's not all one-sided in one way with how the communication goes and and the interactions are kind of sometimes is unpredictable and and I feel like that's what makes a relationship exciting and a thrill is that it's like something you look forward to and there's an I feel like the element of surprise is really under um under what's the word underrated or for example like someone who

taps and taps out like I never know when I'm getting at that message but I know it's coming I know they're going to come back around and it will happen but it's an it's a it's an exciting thing when it happens because I don't expect it and I think that person is purposely doing that because they understand that they understand what they're doing and I'm just saying um that I appreciate that a lot and it's working so dude someday I'll write a love story novel or some shit um I know guys I know I have my pants down I'm being very vulnerable this episode but just know I'm a hopeless romantic I am that little like cheese ball I want to be I'm the Disney princess looking for prince charming that's what i want and uh yeah so let's read some more

okay i said life is about nuance okay whatever exceed expectations i got that from fucking impulsive last spring i think life advice they gave out number one advice they got like business and life was exceed expectations like a look I think Logan Paul said that I don't know where he heard it or whatever it stemmed from but exceeding expectations is great advice especially with your job like you might be asked to do something but do more always do more always do more exceed what they want you to do because then that they then you become an an asset or you become a like what's the word like try to make yourself irreplaceable I guess um let me keep scrolling

guys I have so much on this page I could literally do the next month of just this document and talk about it do you guys want to know like do you guys want me to talk about my writings for a month I think I've read some of this before but I'm I know I have new listeners so by the way if you're a new listener hit that subscribe button I'm here 70s a week oh yeah I think I've read this before on the show I have an obsessive belief that

I can obtain anything that's why I don't settle complacency is soul death when something isn't putting me closer to what I want I'm out I have an obsessive belief that I can obtain anything yeah facts I always say like why not me like Russell Wilson Seahawks Super Bowl why not us why not us I feel like that was like fucking so four years ago or whatever but I have this and I and I actually wrote I feel like this thought came to mind when I was 18 I started realizing some shit about the world and

I think I've always been mesmerized by people that have quote-unquote made it or that are extremely successful like world-renowned like top people of the world just like doing awesome shit I've always been mesmerized by that I'm like why them or what what did they do differently or how do they live their life how do they think you know and so I think I've studied that or I don't think I, I know I've studied, I've spent quite a bit of my 20 so far observing those people and kind of watching what they do. Haven't applied any of that shit. I mean, clearly I'm fucking, you know, I'm kidding. I'm a nobody. I'm a fucking loser. This is not, I'm putting the confidence cloak on. I'm putting it back on. Sorry. Just fell off. Um, I'm great. I'm going

to do well in this world with whatever I choose to do and um but I realized I think around 18 I was like dude we all popped out of the womb the same we all got pushed out of our mother's vagina exactly the same every single one of us every single person has this like started out on there was a level playing field you were born the same as everyone else so I go because of that I thought of the idea like okay well we're all the same so why not me like why is so and so more special because you know like no one is better than anyone oh that's what I said we all popped I think I wrote this I probably could scroll down and find it it's gonna take forever I probably i'd have to dig before i'd have to pause this and find it basically everyone oh i probably said i

why not me we all came into this world exactly the same no one is better than anyone else like literally like no one there isn't a single soul on this planet that's more important than another one it's all subjective it's all just like what's but some people there's a hierarchy there's definitely a social hierarchy there's class systems and and it's a it's a real thing my point is like one soul isn't more valuable than another soul they're all I feel like they're all um exactly the same value every human being is the exact same value at a soul level and then I think the difference with people is as you live your life or what differentiates people in the class systems and the hierarchy of you know social power and everything is

like the more like the value you value you bring to the world and the changes you can make in the world like that bumps you up right so those are facts but I just think like if you're at the beginning of some new endeavor a new goal you're you know trying to accomplish or something if you have that why not me we're all the same mindset it's just like dude fucking send it you got this you got this jimmy is just gonna electric himself fuck okay i have too many cords attached to me right now dude i look like i'm in a hospital i've like ivs hooked up with their headsets come on bubba you're having the post dinner or post shitting joy time right now or funsies you're having a energy spike because he's emptied his bowels that happens to all of us you

know in the mornings you have your coffee you take a shit and you're really energized happens to me too yeah i know i'm being very uh tacky by talking about that but honesty honesty saturday let's do it so anyways dude just boss up boss up why do you think I'm fucking sending it on the podcast because I finally sat down with myself the confidence clothes the confidence cloak is on so please remember when I sound cocky on this episode it's being exasperated by my it's it's because of what I'm wearing the cloak is bringing out this boldness in me tonight so just roll with it. Take this with a grain of salt. This is entertainment. Okay. I'm here for entertainment purposes. And everything I say is a little inflated so that, you know, it's worth your

time. Cause I've, I've, I fucking, I podcasted for the last seven days on no sleep. All I talked about for the last seven days was my dog shits all the time, pisses all the time. I haven't slept. He wakes me up at two in the morning. We have to go out in the city to pee. It's very rough. I'm trying to bring back the old me in this episode and part of my my my my efforts are going to be a little bit out there okay and I know one of those episodes oh podcasting seven days a week and I'm sending it why am I sending it well um let's just say I fucking uh so I already released like I don't care what people think of me I don't I'm like really open for I'm like impenitent my what's the word I'm um

I'm like down for the what's the word I you can't really humiliate me or make me feel bad about myself or like not I'm impenetrable like what is I feel bulletproof right now because I finally just said fuck it you know I don't care I legitimately don't care of I'm not afraid of what people will think of me at all anymore and that's in a healthy way not in a I'm a reckless person I'm just gonna fling myself around and talk about whatever and not get and not care but it's like I'm I don't you can't come at me with the you know you're too much you're too loud you're too whatever things that I think I was afraid of being in the past so anyways that's why I'm just so down to do this all the time and and talk it out and not hold back it's like I'm at that point

where I'm just like I rose my I raised my hand I stepped up to the plate I said I'll podcast I'll do it I'll do it I'm here let's do it but I forgot you know not to like flex or anything or it's just like um you know I am putting my legs up on my table right now I'm sitting back I literally look like the CEO who doesn't give a fuck right now at their own, at their office, at their CEO desk, just like spread an eagle, both legs on the table, straddling their laptop. That's me. So guys, a little secret is that, um, I've had, so I've had multiple encounters. I forgot about this. I feel like I blacked out after this happened and I blocked my brain, like blocked it. and I actually recently thought about it I literally started podcasting and it I forgot

about it until like a month or so in and then I was like oh my god I was literally prompted I was like prompted to do this I forgot about that like I wasn't there are so for example without naming names and name dropping and being like oh someone cool out there thinks I'm cut out for this but literally people that you know of you definitely know of let me just say you like literally um if I okay they are household names okay there are three people three individuals that I have had conversations with that have literally said I mean, and I know they were just, you know, maybe trying to be nice because I'm, you know, just like a young person trying to find themselves. And, of course, any person that has life experience and wisdom is going to recommend you go after it, kid.

Follow your dreams. You got what it takes. Go do it, right? But I forgot about how people I respect in this industry were, like, cheering me on about it at one point. in an interaction in in in that's a hard thing to say in in interactions the interactions I have with them um when I look back I'm like wait a minute they're they were fucking telling me to do this without telling me to do this if that makes sense and um Jimmy is gonna electrocute himself again I'm sorry guys I'm saying something kind of profound right now and it's like you know

It's my time to shine, not yours. You ate dinner, go to sleep. I'll abuse them later. I'll abuse them later and punish them. Don't worry guys. I know you want me to do it now live on the air so you can call the ASPCA, but you're not getting any soundbites, any squeals, nothing. So anyways, I just thought of that. Like literally I did this on a whim. It wasn't planned. And then it surfaced. I'm like, Oh my God. Oh my God. Of course I'm a podcast host of course I'm doing this dude I'm just one of the boys let's be honest I'm one of the boys I'm one of the boys so I don't know feel free to guess in the dms who I may or may not be talking about oh for one of them you would actually shit your pants you would actually shit your pants and

be like there's no way that's impossible there's no way and I know I'm being fucking annoying right now by even saying, I'm like, I'm not going to name drop, but you will shit your pants if I drop this name. Maybe that's all you need to know. Maybe that's a giveaway. I don't know. Fuck, should I say this clue? I was going to talk about Jimmy, but I won't. Okay. Oh, one liner slash jokes. I have no tolerance for intolerance. I don't know why I wrote that. I just probably thought it sounded cool. I bring a lot of bras on vacation for someone that only has two boobs. Yeah, that's like a throwback 20. It's probably a high school tweet. I bring a lot of bras on vacation for someone that only has two boobs. Um, let me see here. Sorry. I'm

just like randomly scrolling through these one-liners here. Life advice, shut the fuck up. that's rude. Oh, I don't just parallel park. I put on a goddamn show. I've, I think that's a, I've said that a lot. Obviously one is the loneliest number because it has a big nose and no ass. Just performed a colonoscopy on my vacuum. I was dating this guy once and he came home to me like face like ass up face down in the vacuum like the position I literally had like a pair of scissors and then like probably a screwdriver it's just like a yeah like a screwdriver ripping the hair out and it was the most funny thing because I'm like pulling the hair out of the bottom right and then I got to go up the tube and it's literally like you're doing a colonoscopy so

I wrote that I guess just performed a colonoscopy on my because if you think about like the tube on them. Okay, you guys get it. I can't sleep unless I'm naked. I don't see why this flight attendant can't understand that. Age is just how crispy you are from going around the sun like a rotisserie chicken. Age is just how crispy you are from going around the sun like a rotisserie chicken age is just how crispy you are from going around the sun like what the fuck it is kind of like that though like dude you wrinkle up it's like you're literally rotating around the sun like you know when you go to the grocery store you see all the chickens and the rotisserie machine thing the oven that's us and then every year you get like a new wrinkle

and you're like slowly crisping and then your fucking skin starts sagging and then it's like to the bag of broccoli and carrots sitting next to the ice cream in the fridge first of all the ice cream would be in the freezer so I don't understand this tweet these are just like I don't know if I tweeted this is probably I just have it on my google doc because I copy and paste all the notes I literally would take notes I would like think of tweets and write them right so I just copied and pasted on this to the bag of broccoli and carrots sitting next to the ice cream in the fridge you're embarrassing yourselves so I should not have said ice cream ah hey hey hey Jimmy that really hurt yeah I know this podcasting thing is confusing

you don't know who I'm talking to you look tired and sad and I feel like his facial expression would fit right in with the uh aspca sarah mclaughlin in the arms of the angels fly away like he would fit in right now i love when he tilts his head it tilts his head is so cute anyways you're embarrassing yourselves i said like broccoli and carrots in the fridge are embarrassing them embarrassing themselves i should have said next to like pizza because that would make sense let the shits fall where they may and then dash birds let the shits fall where they may um I'm a professional wheelbarrow racing wheelbarrow oh yeah have I talked about wheelbarrow wheelbarrow wheelbarrow racing on this podcast before maybe I have whatever I said

are people wheelbarrow wheelbarrow wheelbarrow racing anymore is that even a thing like do schools have field day or like fairs where like one of the activities out on the school field is a wheelbarrow race and in and in that race what's your position what's your preferred position because i love being that wheelbarrow and i like how oh no dude my foot cream is going to be on your fucking mouth. God, hold on one second. He had my sock and I have foot cream on. I didn't want him to ingest it. Yeah. So when you're a wheelbarrow and you get like push, like your partner's like really pushing you. Your arms are just kind of moving on their own. Like, do you know what I mean? Like there's some momentum and there's like, I can't even describe

it. If you've, if you know that feeling, you know that feeling, but dude, are people even doing it anymore? Do you own a wheelbarrow? If you own a wheelbarrow, wheelbarrow, fuck that word, wheelbarrow, wheelbarrow, you're doing great in life. Should I wrap this episode? I don't know. let's do a couple more I think I'm gonna just keep this keep this series going yeah I eat KFC the day before Thanksgiving

I have to pregame eating cereal out of a stone guacamole bowl I don't give a fuck dude i'm such an out there dude i was an angsty teen i was an angsty teen um hold on captions dude i wrote like captions for instagram real g's move in silence like lasagna okay that's like an overused one

sometimes you got to take a booty pic to remind yourself who the fuck you are quote of the day sometimes you got to take take a booty pic to remind yourself who the fuck you are dude that's honestly okay girls i don't know guys do you take hot pics of yourself literally like it's so I feel like it's so good for the soul to take pictures of yourself and like feel yourself and like take an insta photo or like pose in the mirror and take a shot and like put on a sexy outfit and like take a picture it's like it it's just like good little it's like a nice thing to do for your it's like a good I got this thing like I still got it going on I'm hot I'm like you feel good about yourself and it's like a it's like a little me time thing

like I'm not gonna be shy about admitting that I think a lot of girls out there um take pics for that reason like you feel just like you just feel good you're just like yeah I don't know it's okay to like how you look and and show it off like I don't think there's anything wrong with that you got to be confident you got to like share it you got to enjoy it you're not gonna look that great forever you know or that young and hot dude it's okay the picnic basket isn't going on a on a beach date it's all yours dude I'm getting so good at petting dogs it's bullshit I don't know um I can detect someone peeling an orange six miles away why is sunday only four hours long

blueberries are an excellent excellent source of blueberries wait fucking donuts are just like mexican food all the same ingredients just used in different why that makes zero sense personality olympics gold medalist fuck me dude i'm exposing myself i wrote that literally i wrote that get a personality.com i should like dude i could start a movement called get a personality i don't know you know and i'll admit i was listening as you know, I said yesterday, I was like, or a couple of days ago, I was going to watch the Lex Friedman, Tim Dillon podcast. Right. I sat and watched it. And, um, Tim made a great point. He said, social media is making everyone like bland and boring. It's there. People aren't

interesting anymore and and and people aren't layered and and they're in in like complex and the everyone's personality is getting doled down and dumbed down because of social media and it's like there's not a lot to them and everyone's being kind of put under there's like a formula at play everyone everyone participates in especially i'd say like you know the one i play And the field I'm on, the fucking court I'm suiting up for every day on Instagram is like, I'm a mid-20s girl who takes pictures of herself that are not, that aren't ugly. They are not ugly. Well, okay, that's subjective. They are not, that sounds like, am I full of myself?

I'm not a, I'm a conventionally, got to know yourself. Got to know what you're working with. I may, on the scale of, like, what's attractive, I understand where I'm at, and it's not, like, on the lower end of, like, I'm just talking about, like, when I take a selfie, I don't know. My mom and dad were hot. I happen to have a nice face. I know that, okay? I don't have a crooked nose. I know that. I don't have, I don't know. Is it weird to say that? Is anyone uncomfortable, or is that um is fuck now every time I post a picture people are gonna be like you just think you're so hot you just think you're so good looking it's fuck you can't it's literally like

here's where I'm at this is why I just I literally put myself out there on a podcast seven seven days a week because I don't care you can't win so it doesn't matter what I say someone isn't gonna like it I'm not for everybody and that's okay but um why was I bringing up Instagram so my point is is like there are girls out there that look similar to me and we all kind of do the same thing on Instagram and eventually everyone starts looking the same does that make sense there's like a formula everyone's playing the same game and it works trust me it fucking works now when I say it works are you you're probably like well you're not you're not excuse me bitch you can't even do swipe ups. You don't even have 10 K. You barely have any followers. You're not that cool. Like,

who do you think you are to say that? Um, I'm just saying it obviously works for a lot of people out there who are bad bitches and who are, you know, they have a ginormous following and personal brand and all that great stuff. So I think anyways, back to Tim Dillon, I really liked that because, dude, when you throw a little salt, when you put a little fucking cayenne in addition to salt and pepper on your meal, just a little dash of cayenne, maybe a little cumin, a little oregano, garlic powder, onion powder, a little, uh, dude, ghost pepper, fuck, little ghost pepper from Trader Joe's, that's interesting, okay, that's fun to eat, but everyone's, it's a lot of salt and pepper out there, in a world of salt and pepper, add some, add some spice, add that

cayenne add more and i think that's something i would want i guess a theme i want to carry throughout the years of podcasting is like i just want people to be at home with themselves exactly how they are and share it that's what i'm not seeing i'm not seeing a lot of people out there share it like they're i'm sure there's people with wonderful personalities really interesting cool people that for whatever reason there's like a block there where i think now if we're all if we're all you know if we're all gonna be on the internet everyone's gonna have a profile and an online persona shouldn't the goal be to show up exactly how the fuck you come across exactly who you are there's no like you know what i mean because i swear to god i follow people still

to this day i'm like i don't know what their voice sounds like literally couldn't tell you what their laugh sounds like i don't know how they think or what they like no one is i feel like that would be more um I don't know I just feel like that is the movement there should be a movement I don't fucking know what I'm saying and I know people are it's not like everyone needs to share everything on the internet but it'd be nice like people feeling comfortable to just like post weird like look at what Justin Bieber posts I always go back to him he's just like I don't give a fuck I'm gonna post this I don't give a fuck this is interesting I'm post that. Here's a Jesus quote. Here's my fucking shoes. Like, I don't know. I just feel like a lot

of, I don't know. What am I saying? I'm kind of getting like in a loopy spiral here. I guess I just feel like, what quote was I reading? Why did I scroll all the way back to the top? God damn it. It's related somehow to what I read on my document oh I know I was down on the captions section how are you guys doing is this an interesting episode I hope so sorry about the dog he shit I got ice cream he's eating my sock now I'm just praying it's not you know I bet the the foot cream feels like a rubbed in all the way so we're good. Where are we at here? Sorry. Inspo. One-liners. Captions. oh I was talking about Tim Dillon

I don't know where I'm just trying to find the the quote I was trying to relate this back to whatever um but I found I just that resonated with me what he said because I I definitely I think we all see it we all know it uh he mentioned how kids now like their whole childhood and is they have an online experience now and their relationships with their friends it's like a lot of online interaction and um he thinks it's the lack of personality is it's getting like it's just like a

fucking new way of being a person on this planet you're just there's not a lot there but because it's just like you're plugged in on the phone all day and there's not a lot more to you there's not a lot more to your life a lot of there's just I don't know but yeah if I could if I could inspire one person out there who has kind of been like here's the reason why I say this because I'm saying because I literally went through this and now I'm sharing my story I used to just show the I would just be like a face and a name on the internet you didn't really know much about me I wasn't really I didn't have a podcast like this obviously like I didn't share a lot about who I am and in my experience and I always heard listen I always

heard about people's talk about be vulnerable share your story you'll feel at peace you'll feel free with yourself it's gonna be great once you do that you'll you'll fly and you'll feel great and it'll just be an amazing you'll life will be amazing once you do that and I always heard that and I it sat with me but I always felt scared right so the podcast obviously forces me to do I have to talk it out but the reason why I'm saying this I hope it if one person out there has been kind of clammed up hasn't really shared about themselves and what they go through like any vulnerabilities at ever on the internet not even you know uh like a in a joking way even they've never shared anything like I'm just I want the kids I want people out there to start doing

that and just shoot it straight man just like say it how it is say it how it is again I think another theme I carry through the show is in a world of cancel culture in a world where anything you say is gonna get fucking clap back and someone's gonna disagree with you and all that fun shit uh I know I'm brave I know I'm brave as fuck I'm doing this and I'm not um I'm I'm going into the storm basically because it's not easy to flap your gums well for me it is I'm saying like in this world it's hey hey not the extension cord there you go you guys know what I mean like it's it's a little sketchy now when you share your opinions and ideas and rant and riff and talk shit on the internet like it's a it can be a

little bit freaky you know and I my so yeah the theme I want to kind of carry through is that fuck it that's not how I grew up okay that's not a world I want to live in so what am I how am I going to be the difference I want to see. I'm going to send it. I'm going to show up, say how it is, uh, with, you know, grace and what's the word eloquence or as best as possible, you know? Um, I, I just don't, I don't want to sugarcoat things and make, you know, the sum yuppity, like self-love self-care routine. Let's put on our skincare and fucking drink our green juice. fuck it like I don't I'm so burned out of all that shit that's not real life dude my dog just shit on my floor twice let's talk about it let's talk about it who gives a fuck we're all gonna

die someday let's not get dark right now but let's do it I mean we're all gonna die someday so have fun be colorful have a personal share yourself man share your personality I know I know and here's the thing the social media sharing isn't for everyone but what I mean is like in your relationships with new people with strangers like put yourself out there a little more it feels good once you kind of go into the deep end and realize like it wasn't scary when I shared like when I just kind of said it how it was said said it how it is like I swear to god every time I'm in a new group of people now like literally every time I'm always making commentary about like I'm making I'm somehow breaking people down breaking the situation down to a real level where I'm

trying to make it less serious and fun so people start feeling comfortable like that is what I love to do because I realize like a lot of people run like they're running hot and like wound up tight and they're skittish and a little scared and they're not really comfortable with themselves and everything's like we gotta get this whatever anyways I can't go on guys I literally I'm just pulling my dog with a rope all right that's episode 140 what is it 149 happy Saturday hope you had a good weekend or hope you have a good weekend I'll be here tomorrow um I don't know I'm trying to bring it back I'm trying to bring the heat back bring the confidence back the bold statements you know just for it's fucking fun it's fun to just talk

yourself up and feel confident I don't know everyone should put on a confidence cloak for the next month with me and um let's make it confidence cloak February I don't know dude fucking how is it February okay love you guys happy Saturday hit that subscribe button uh, follow me on Instagram for all the Jimmy updates. I'm posting them all day long. Ow! Sorry for literally causing you hearing loss. That was my calf. Okay. He just bit it like a drumstick, like a fucking chicken drumstick. Speaking of KFC, Jimmy thinks my leg is KFC fried chicken there you go he's annoyed I really you know what it is I feel bad I haven't been attending to him for what an hour since I've been recording

so I really need to go so yeah anyways hit that subscribe button leave me a review it helps me out it helps people find out about the show um follow me on Instagram and oh fuck patreon.com slash tjms it's my bonus content section of the internet you can find exclusive Jacqueline Monroe content over there go discover it for yourself I've got a you know pictures videos anything you want you guys can put your so patrons get shout outs they get phone calls they can do their own they can give me input on what to talk about there's all kind of perks and bonus content so patreon.com slash tjms that's it guys hope you have a great saturday and i will talk to you tomorrow all right bye