The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 167- Everything Is F*cked.

Episode Date: February 19, 2021

Happy Thursday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS ROBMON:  https://open.spotify.com/artist/2d4jPCnnODLVsSNOWJorAy?si=0yxA6iagSAW0uOfIudovGw&nd=1 https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic

Hey guys, happy Thursday. It's episode 167. Welcome back to the show. it's Jacqueline welcome back to the show how's it going how's everyone doing um who's cold how's your fucking power grid let me know um before I get into things first off please hit that subscribe button I'm here seven days a week uh and head over to patreon.com slash tjms to become a patron and get access to more of me more of my content i do shout outs i do phone calls i post pictures and videos on there so check it out at patreon.com slash t j m s yeah so back to the fucking blizzard we are in uh i can't relate honestly because i'm in you know san diego where it's always sunny um what was that show it's

always sunny in philadelphia yeah right what the fuck no it's not what the fuck i just put that together in my head i don't know why um so yeah basically today's gonna be news heavy it's gonna be news heavy i have a lot to report on we're gonna be talking about a murder what was that we're gonna be talking about a murder we're gonna be talking about texas we're going to be talking about bill gates we're going to be talking about governor cuomo cuomo we're going to be talking about i have literally the amount of mike pence we're gonna talk about him um vegas we're gonna talk about vegas i guys okay i'm uh i'm new with this game where i feel like i'm on a kick i'm on a little i'm on a little kick where i'm like fresh off of social media

it's 7 p.m and i i just want to like i i've collected notes all day as i was scrolling and tapping and everything and i i just i feel like i'm on a kick of telling you guys updates about like the news and shit so i i'm not i'm not prepared like we're gonna get our shit together while i podcast but like the first thing i see here is gators heart rates are down to three beats per minute and they're in hibernation because of the blizzard in texas the american alligator is on it's on its way out they're they're in ponds I saw this video of a fucking gator snout sticking out of a pond and apparently their heart rates are down to three beats per minute and you know what it's kind of intelligent I mean it's probably just instinctual for

instinctual for them to do that but um it would it would suck to see them go if this if this blizzard takes them out that would really suck to know that um those those ponds and and swamps and Texas will be empty of galligators so yeah like like when I say I'm not prepared like that's just like the first thing on the list here and following that I have a question uh inspired by something I saw on social media or just in general um I wrote do kids get bullied anymore are kids being humbled uh is that a thing because everyone is so I feel like the younger generation is so obviously they're easily offended by everything you know and and it's all about babysitting everyone else and and taking care of each other which sounds beautiful but

I think people need I think bullying is uh it's not happening in elementary schools and as a former receiver I was on the receiving end of being bullied I was uh how do I say this? I was bullied my entire life. Um, still am, you know, uh, by you listening. I know you're a hater. I know you're secretly, you secretly don't like me, but you're like, I can't stop listening. So I consider you a bully. I really wish I fucking prepared for this podcast, but yeah, I just thought of that. I thought of that. I'm like, it's just not seem, I think, I feel like it's just, it's a, it's a, fucking utopia of woke shit around around campus around these fucking elementary schools

and there's nothing no one is being humbled nobody's being taken down that no one's building character from it no one's developing an interesting personality and learning how to like you know stand up for themselves and like fucking stand up to a bully I don't know anything any anyways uh next thing here is about my intelligence and I thought I thought um I saw something about I've always thought of I've always known about having like an IQ score but I didn't understand that some people are some like I learned that I probably have I haven't looked it up honestly but probably haven't I have high eq compared to my iq like it's the balance would be i have a higher eq than an iq because

i've i've told you guys i felt i felt um dumb for a long time i i feel uh uh yeah unintelligent uneducated stupid i can't i i don't know i i don't know what it is like i i okay i just have been I've been made to believe that I think because of the way I say shit and then when I get uh I've been like reprimanded or not I've been like called out on it before for pretty much like since high school like my interpretation of information sounds insane to people it makes sense in my brain but like if I repeat it back to you it won't make sense to you and I've I have this stupid like uh perception of myself that's like I'm I'm actually fucking I should write I should have ridden the short bus to school. Yeah. So, um, and you know what? My mom rode the short

bus and she has that same issue with herself, even though she's an intelligent person. My mom was dyslexic and she had to ride the fucking short bus as a kid and that damaged her and she still talks about it. And I, uh, okay. So anyways, I probably, because of my emotional intelligence, I read about it. I probably have a high, high EQ. So what I'm learning is that there are ways you can boost like there's there's things you can do to help boost your IQ and I don't know why that's important to me but I feel like I want to uh go into training go into IQ training do brain games or whatever the fuck and just like work that muscle more uh so I sound more fucking sophisticated on a microphone because this is now my seven day a week gig and I'm a free flow and thinker and

just like everything comes out like a waterfall and I'm not very um I don't talk like a robot and I just feel insecure about that so sometimes I'm like okay uh at some point uh keep keep educating yourself thoroughly and uh get better at retaining information so you have that banked in your brain somewhere so you can say a nice sentence on your podcast and win people over and uh make them and or like sound more credible and uh yeah let's just gain your let's just gain credibility right now with a fucking um uh dog sniffing people's asses in miami i don't know if i could have said that more intelligently so apparently this is news the the miami heat will be allowing fans back in their stadiums

with a catch okay they're gonna have they're they're starting to use uh covid sniffing dogs apparently when you have covid there's a scent to you that a dog can detect like a like a drug dog at the airport like same shit but i didn't actually read this it was something i heard through the grapevine of social media which honestly is a in my experience a very trustworthy source like everything I see on social media seems to be a hundred percent true and I can always trust what I see on social media so when this person said the stank of COVID comes out of your ass because they found out I think in China that swabbing your ass is how you can like you can now stick something in your butt to find COVID or to test for COVID you'll be able to

do it there instead of your nose and so I'm uh what this person connected was oh so when you good in the Miami Heat game the dog will come and sniff your ass and then if it sits you have COVID if it doesn't sit you're good you can go watch the game again that's something I heard through the grapevine it is a fact that they will be allowing fans back and they will be using COVID sniffing dogs the whole sniffing your ass thing is I have I can't confirm that and honestly I don't want to find the tab I have opened I just I'll fucking do it I have so many tabs open I have to find uh the fucking Miami tab it says Miami okay Miami heat to welcome back fans with help of COVID sniffing dogs does have anything does it have any info about where they'll be sniffing you

or just like I don't know okay so there's that I'm just gonna move on like again none of this stuff connects like kids getting bullied gators heart rates down eq iq miami heat dogs sniffing people's asses oh i have an update about that math the racist math uh the what did i say the white supremacy or uh okay let me take a sip of my la croix this is actually insane i'm all over the place i am under pressure to perform when the microphone is recording i have to fucking give I have to go and I have to send it for you guys. And I'm just really, I'm skittish. I'm really skittish tonight. And I don't know what it is. I did see a UFO about an hour ago and I feel like it's affecting me. Guys, I went on a walk with my puppy. Me and Jimmy went on a walk. It's more of

a shit trip. It's a shit trip. It's a shit trip. I mean, the purpose of the walk is for him to take a shit outdoors instead of indoors. So we went on our shit trip and I was actually going to look it up on social media but there's an airport where obviously like I can see the planes fly out of the city and like I can tell that's a plane in the sky when I see it right however there was this and I was looking at the sky I'm like there are no stars in the sky yet it was it was like it was like 5 30 ish and I saw the moon straight ahead straight above my head but then like out at the horizon just like a little bit above it was this fireball of orange that wasn't wasn't the sun and it had like a tail on it and it was like I was squinting and I'm like I know I've been looking

at a screen all day I know I've been like you know maybe my eyes aren't working right now I don't know but it wasn't a star and it wasn't a plane and it was it was this fucking fireball i'm gonna look it up is fox 5 san diego on this shit mysterious orb in the sky um fox 5 uh i'm typing the wrong thing ufo san diego it's gonna give me that uh fucking tic tac thing uh news i need to get twitter back because here's my favorite thing about twitter whenever i like suspected earthquake a ufo anything like that you search like i would tonight i would type ufo san diego and then i would see the recent tweets about it and then if if someone else felt the earthquake saw the ufo they and tweeted about it

it like helps like reaffirm or whatever what's the word i'm i'm struggling with my words i i uh non-negotiable non-negotiable was the word i was looking for yesterday and today's word uh is it's giving me reassurance or confirmation that what i saw was a ufo okay yeah reassurance sure uh guys we're working on my ikea right now i'm trying to find the right definition or the right word to use so yeah it was it kind of fucked me up and i um i'm i'm an obnoxious observer of shit in the sky like when I see something I lock eyes on it and I do not look away and I was literally walking backwards to make sure I wasn't looking away from it because I was assuming it was gonna just poof or just like zigzag around or something and it just had this weird like tail

on it I don't know it's probably nothing but you know just let me dream let me yeah so why was I saying that oh it's because i'm skittish because the ufo right yeah i don't know i'm skittish um okay do i want to talk about the murder the murder oh i was gonna talk about bill and bill and melinda melinda gates bankrolling the uh anti-racism and math movement in oregon they um they're behind that i read about that today i had told you guys yesterday that it is now a form of white supremacy to share your work in math class and i read here they want to now encourage um let me find it it's like they want to encourage encourage singing and dancing in math i'm not fucking around when i say like um

um, oh, did I, I deleted the tab, I clicked the tab off, okay, Bill Emel indicates math races to click, here we go, yeah, here we go, it's like the first pause of the episode, guys, just bask in this silence right now, I know, it's kind of nice when I'm not talking, here we go it was something I read something here that was like the first step is to admit that you've been racist as a math teacher like I'm not this is actual real life okay okay a quick way to dismantle the white supremacist culture according to the text

is to eliminate order in the classroom so order equals white supremacy the text argues requiring students to raise their hand before speaking can reinforce paternalism and power hoarding in addition to breaking the process of thinking learning and communicating and my bullshit detector is broken because i fucking banged it so hard instead it recommends you teach math via storytelling circles that's literature incorporating dance music song call and response and other cultural ways of communicating go fuck yourself to be an anti-racist math teacher admit your racism so anyways the update i i wanted to write or i wanted to update you guys because i talked about yesterday the update is that uh bill and

melinda gates are bankrolling this shit so i don't know if you're a fan of him before this i don't know if you care at all i don't know honestly here's here's my stance on just about everything uh related to bill gates i see something i see i see one side i see the other side and i just don't i honestly have i'm just like a a little speck i'm one little person sitting here doing my podcast do my work drinking LaCroix uh you know I'm in San Diego it's just like I'm just trying to stay alive okay I'm hoping my power doesn't fucking shut off I'm hoping China doesn't invade you know I got bigger fish to fry than to worry that Bill Gates is evil and like you know how all these all these people love talking about conspiracies surrounding Bill Gates and I just

honestly like i don't i don't dedicate time to like my brain doesn't it hasn't it doesn't have a stance on that man it's just like okay a lot is being talked about he's doing a lot of shit the the fucking man just bought up a quarter of a million acres in farmland he's now the biggest he owns the most farmland he's the biggest farmer in the united states that's another update quarter million acres in farmland and he's also buying companies that are um shooting particles into the atmosphere to dim the sun so when i hear shit like this about bill gates i'm like first of all not a supporter of the white supremacy math thing at all obviously i swore pretty loudly there um Um, but like when I hear about him buying farmland and him, and if it's, if he's going to

help improve agriculture, then I'm all like, I think there's shit that he does. That's actually good. And there's people already making conspiracies because they're like, well, he bought farmland near but near streams of water like water sources so he's going to uh hoard the water supply and poison us and cause infertility with water and the depopulation will be in uh from drinking water and becoming infertile and it's all his evil plan like i've heard the craziest shit so i'm like you know what farmland might just happen to be next to water i feel like there's water everywhere and I don't believe it's because I don't know I don't know um so anyways I got so the update I just read is that they're bankrolling Bill and Bill and Melinda are bankrolling the

bank the bank with the fucking math racist mathing I just love how it was like the first step in your anti-racism teaching practice is or your journey to become an anti-racist math teacher is to first admit that you are racist because you ask students to raise their hand in class like that's literally what it says because you're power hoarding and that's causing students to not be creative and and and so anyways um texas should we move to texas there's so many fucking conspiracies about texas too jesus christ it's like it never ends oh i was gonna talk about the murder guys mike pence is starting a podcast there's nothing else to say that's the update mike pence

is starting a podcast and i guess he was like on the radio back in the day so cool um vitamin administration did i talk about this yesterday yeah i think i did the legal responsibility to include transgender athletes in sports that's now a thing yeah so i think a lot of dude if i was a guy okay i would fucking i would fuck with that so hard if i was a high school boy and I was a, uh, what sport? A fucking swimmer. Wait, wait, what sport would be fucked up? Um, I dunno, like let's just pick something like soccer. And I would claim that I'm a transgender and you like, don't have to cut your dick off. Like you can still have it. You can still be like, you can still carry on life as usual and just say that you're like, I'm pretty

sure like there are gonna be boys out there fucking with the system just because and they'll be playing they'll just like what d1 they're already planning like hey man i want to go to a d1 school i want to play sports i'd love to play soccer but i'm not going to be good enough as a boy so i'm just gonna tell them that i'm a transgender and i'm gonna join the girls team and kick ass and then fucking get a d1 scholarship because it's now uh all of the school's legal responsibility to include my kind in their sports. So yeah, I wonder if there's going to be funny stories around that. It's just fucked up. Everything is fucked and I don't want to be here. I've been really negative lately. And I think the reason why is because it's starting to hit me

because I saw this headline that says, well, it was like a positive thing. I saw this is also news. the Las Vegas day clubs are reopening in March. So I heard that I'm like, woo. Yay. Like I can go out to Vegas and yeah, like good old sweet old times. Yeah. But it's not going to be like it was obviously. But I think I'm starting to realize that, uh, after it's all said and done and I don't know how long, uh, shit's going to carry on like it is now with COVID and shutdowns and just like the tone of everything. Um, I think when it's all said and done, I will look back at my twenties and think two years of partying have been robbed from me. Two years, my hottest years, two of my hottest years have been fucking robbed. Now, while I'm excited about that because of

aging and, um, you know, it's good for my body and my, my face that I'm not, uh, drinking like a fucking sailor. And, and is that a thing? I don't even know, like going out all the time, like I used to and just like I mean I'm in my 20s like I I used to partake in those activities and now I'm realizing that you know I'm just a bump on a log and I and I'm like competing I'm I feel like I'm becoming comfortable with it too like I'm kind of I'm at the point with COVID and just my life where I'm like and this might be different if I didn't work if I worked somewhere in public and I was you know I don't know I just like had a day job where I like got out and I don't know around more people but it's starting to hit me that I'm just at that point with it

where I'm very I think I'm being complacent or I'm very comfortable I'm very um I'm not even like questioning like oh I don't I can't even imagine right now doing a life any different than what I've been doing lately every day is the same I work from home this is like my fancy fucking RV my apartment I'm like glamping I'm staying indoors a lot and I'm not proud of that and I know I told you guys as a joke in 2020 that I'm the quarterback of quarantine but I need I need to get myself out of the house more I need to go and socialize I need to go to fucking Vegas at one of the day clubs when it opens in March and get my shit together because um I just feel like I can't keep that story going on that I've been that I've been I'm being robbed you know

that I'm a victim I'm not gonna use my victimhood and be like you know but it is a thing I feel like a lot of us in our 20s or just in general everyone is going to two years of our lives because I just imagine by the end of this year and this is I don't even know if I hope about this or optimism I don't know if I'm actually, I just think of this as honestly like a 50-50 chance. I imagine by the end of this year, things will be, quote unquote, back to normal. With masks probably and limitations on, you know, crowd size and everything. but like all i want to do this year is get back into a concert live live show next to people shoulder to shoulder you know what the fuck i'm gonna go to a bar and do that like i just want to

be like in people's business in a sweaty environment where we're exchanging body fluids and it's totally normal and no masks like i know that's already happening i know people are partying I know that's happening in like fucking Florida and shit like I know people are I just haven't I personally haven't sought it out and um I'm kind of a loser like I do feel like sometimes I feel like a like I don't want to beat myself up right now but I feel like it's my own doing like I'm not even putting effort into trying to like get myself out there again but fucking whatever because I keep making these excuses these excuses like well I'm I'm I'm grinding I'm doing that thing that they all recommend like you know what grind now shine

later and it's kind of been the thing that's keeping me sane just knowing that I'm putting in a lot of effort in the background of um this podcast and my job and everything into other endeavors and I feel like it's my time right now to like grind grind my gears and burn them in or whatever the fuck while I while things are kind of shut down and shitty and I forget who said this but they said it really well they're like it's kind of like America is this it's like a store going out of business this is definitely Tim Dillon on one of his latest podcasts he's like america is like uh and am i am i even allowed to like repeat what other people say what i is that not good to do but it's his idea but it's like the whole country is like a store

shutting down people are just walking around like aimlessly like it's sad everything about it is still sad and i don't know i feel like it's going to definitely take the year i feel like 2022 is going to be a lot of if things go back to normal why am i even spiraling about this. This is not the topic today. I want to talk about a murder. I want to talk about a murder. Guys, let's get into it. Apparently, I don't even know why, I've never reported a murder, but Raymond Weber, okay, he did a Facebook live stream. This is like such a flip-flop between what I was just talking about but uh here we go he live streamed the rape and murder of a 26 year old and a 15 year old

and yeah um this was in I guess where was this at Elk Grove no excuse me that's not a place um I wasn't queued up already for this I don't even know why sometimes I'm like oh Jacqueline talk about the news talk about current things and I'm like this is like a recent thing so I'm like oh report a murder I don't know is this fucking this is not the crime junkie podcast yeah Raymond Weber live streamed video of himself holding a gun and two girls lying on the floor motionless yeah I think it was after he had killed and raped him and I and I actually watched the video of the post killing and I guess he was Uzi who's Uzi Marcus he's his brother and he said he's

trying he tried to set him up Uzi Marcus is that a rapper Uzi Marcus speaks on his brother killing two girls claiming Uzi set him up okay I don't even know I don't even care about this like I don't know these i don't know who these people are and i feel like that i'm being insensitive though because it's like two people literally just got murdered two girls young one my age um what the fuck but i guess the heat i was seeing around this was it's not being reported like it's not being it's like this was like a huge deal that it was on a live stream and you saw their dead bodies and nothing was being posted on the news about it and so people are pissed on social media

and they're outraged. And so that's why I brought, I, that's why I looked into it and, and read about it. But, um, the guy with Raymond, Raymond Weber is 29. He's 29 from Sacramento, double homicide. Jesus Christ. It's so sad. Yeah. Anyway, so let's move on. Um, I don't even know what's on this list next oh I was gonna talk you know I'm pissed I should have started this out just talking about Texas um apparently like okay there's so much to talk about so I'm hearing a lot of chatter about this being a direct attack on Texas now I mentioned yesterday I said get ready and this wasn't because of the snowstorm this wasn't because it's the snowstorm I I'm saying I told you guys get ready we're gonna we're gonna hear

about Texas all the fucking time now because of everyone flocking to Austin and Austin becoming the new Silicon Valley and Elon going to Austin and Rogan going to Austin everything's awesome awesome awesome in Texas well Texas in general people are flocking there so I just feel like we're gonna hear about it all the time now it's gonna be a thing and I just think it's kind of ironic that now it's the epicenter of fucking blizzard that's causing all these power outages well there's a there's a lot of talk that it's a there's a they're like it's a direct attack from the government on texas because they want to become their own uh they want to separate and they want to do their own thing and um i don't know and then they like rebelled you know and

then apparently like there's other shit that biden reversed trump's executive order that keeps other countries from accessing our bulk power so like people are freaking out saying and i'm just spreading this is probably false information i am not an expert on any of this i'm literally just regurgitating information uh and here's a here's a thing i'll just fucking own it this is what's wrong with social media is it's a game of telephone you never know what to believe and what not to believe but hey and i and i will raise my hand and say i am probably contributing to that by bringing up these stupid conspiracies that who the fuck knows what's real and what's not but that's what the ever so i'm at the point now with it where i'm like look

that is literally we are in this washing machine of misinformation we don't know what to believe anymore it's really hard to decipher things and I'm just kind of like fuck it you know what this is kind of fun to think about like maybe China's gonna turn our fucking power grid off because now they have access to it that'd be fun um you know what's crazy though about this power outage stuff and all this all the shelves being emptied and people's basic necessities are going away it's crazy how this was actually talked about a lot in 2020 a lot of the people that were preparing like the doomsday prepper people they all were all talking about this hey even I was on the phone with one of my friends and he's like yeah they're get ready the power might be going

out around here and cities are hell when that happens so maybe prepare maybe stock up like it could happen they're they're saying it's gonna happen but so there's all there's all this talk about it which is ironic and now there's a you know lowest temperatures ever you know blizzard power outages and it's like what a funny coincidence you know or whatever and so i get why people are going oh well maybe this is all you know thought out and it's a plan and they're trying to like they're there's this video of this redneck in texas so funny he's like he's like see that over there that's a cloud maker that's a cloud maker and it's like it looks like um and honestly didn't didn't look like a factory uh like if you think of like a refinery or something

where there's those um the steam coming out or whatever that looks like a bunch of clouds in the sky it didn't look like that it was actually really low low to the ground it didn't even look like it was coming from a building and it was a there was a bunch of like normal looking clouds coming out of it and I don't know what that was but it he kind of sounded convincing when he said that that there is a cloud maker and so there's people saying that they're um like literally causing the temperature to drop they're like it's like a fucking attack I don't know um I was gonna read something here then people are saying that so let me just read some stats about Texas why is none of my shit queued up I'm embarrassed it's like I just I just

like shut all my tabs before I started this for no reason I was gonna talk about like how the power is distributed in Texas why does that fucking matter I think it's like 18 percent coal it's like 20 percent gas and then wind right like mostly wind but people are saying that gas doesn't freeze natural gas doesn't freeze at uh what is it like 200 and some it's like natural gas doesn't freeze what's the temperature it freezes at 296 degrees fahrenheit um so people are saying that it i don't understand guys i'm not i don't i don't understand this um oh and and like people from other places are saying that yeah in my state in fucking north dakota the wind turbines never freeze over and we have

negative 60 degree temperatures and 40 40 40 mile an hour winds and our wind turbines never freeze over. So what the fuck's going on in Texas? So I looked a little more into that and it's basically a matter of, there wasn't a, uh, there was no, uh, de-icer on them or there wasn't a anti ice system installed. There's like literally like a, I dunno, something that de-ices that the blades. And so Texas wasn't set up for that. And obviously, cause it's never snowing there so um but yeah and then people are bitching about FEMA not really doing much I was like I'm gonna talk a lot about Texas I really have not I don't here's what I have to say about Texas Texas will be fine Texas will be fine storms happen power goes out shit gets crazy

for a long time with that and then everything will be fine this is not a it's it's sad to think about people being cold and people's homes being flooded and like people's people losing their homes people the homeless people being cold like it's awful it's horrible but at the end of the day this is mother nature it's just and it's fucking texas they will be fine and i think that it's great social media you know everyone's coming together like donate you know help support a fucking like sponsor a family in Texas and like get them a sweater you know that's great I think it's beautiful but uh the hysteria around it right now it's just stupid it's like dude I think when the power the when the power went out at my house because it goes out all the time back where I live

you know a drunk driver hits a fucking telephone pole and the whole neighborhood is out um it's fun I love hunkering down I love having that dead noise because there's no nothing is turned on and you you have a bunch of candles lit and you're you're walking around with flashlights and um you know it's scary but you know what and I understand if it's multiple days of that that's that that would really suck and I and I get why people it it it is a tragedy it is really sad um how much people are struggling with with being cold and everything but i think it's going to be good for good for texas and it you know what this country's gotten too fucking soft and uh it it's i think it's good and it's bringing people

together you know i'm sure the communities are coming together people are helping each other out around the neighborhood and i think it's fine um but the treatment of it on like that the swipe throughs the fucking memes or the not the memes the the sexy posts about texas are just i don't know kind of insane i feel like um i don't know what else i i literally shut my notebook i'm like i think i think i'm done i think i'm done um oh their game stop hearing happened i didn't look up anything about that so i have nothing to say other than um people are pissed i did see that people are pissed i don't know why they're pissed. I can assume why they're pissed, but yeah, the game, game stop hearing

happened. Um, let's see if I missed anything and let me know. Do you like it when I read about current events and shit, or do you prefer me talking about my personal life and my life updates? And like today, um, it's Thursday. I worked and I actually, I can tell you guys, let's just go to my personal life I think all this like new stuff is kind of done yeah um whatever I tried my best you know what that's what I always say this is just like you know what just do your best post it who gives a fuck it was fun I honestly had fun learning about all the things going on but um I don't know I just don't feel like I'm very um cut out I'm not cut out for it talking about news I'm just like eh I like talking to you guys about like fucked up news

and like strange news. Cause I think it's, it's, it's more fun. And I don't know, I have more to say. So personal life update. Uh, I did spend a good chunk of the morning facing a bunch of clothes in my closet. I just stared at them and I just kind of got sad, um, because I haven't worn them and so long and I'm like it's it's like it's so weird I'm like wait a minute I didn't really wear any I didn't wear no I didn't really I didn't wear any of this shit all of 2020 and it was weird to like look at it today and realize that do I keep it obviously like it's probably good to keep around but like do I store it away and just like put all my sweats and sweatpants up and just like keep that in my closet and nothing else. Like it's getting really sad in

there. And I just had a moment today of this like realization that I just wear sweatpants all the time and yoga pants. And I look like a fucking Real Housewives mom with her. It's like I'm out on the street with my dog, with my hat and my like my fucking Nike hat, my Lulu zip up and my fucking yoga pants and my I wear like the fuzzy slippers and I'm just like am I like I just I used to dress up every all the time and I and I don't know maybe I should just do that for myself maybe I should do that for myself put on cute clothes around the house and I I like the idea of that but I always go back to like why would I want a tank top strap like digging in my shoulder when I could just wear a hoodie. Like, you know, I like the idea of it. And then

when I do it, I'm like, I just want to be comfy. And I like soft things. I like to be cozy. I like hoodies. I like sweatpants. I like, I don't know. My life is changing. It's very different than it used to be. And this morning was, it was a trip looking at my clothes going. And honestly, what I did is I I uh I put him in a a big suitcase like all the dresses I had and the cute tops and everything I just threw him in a suitcase and tucked him away for for uh for the new the new opening the grand opening of the fucking world and I don't know like I'm at the point now like if a guy if I go on a date I just I'm gonna like show up in my fucking car heart hoodie I'm wearing right now and just be like look this is what it is right now I'm not gonna try to put on

a show for you and dress all cute because I haven't dressed all cute in years bitch it's been fucking like if I'm coming out as my authentic self right now I'm in yoga pants I'm in a hoodie I'm wearing my fuzzy leopard slippers my hair is in a bun and I'm not wearing makeup and this is this is who i am in 2021 and all of 2020 it would feel fake as fuck if i showed up in a sundress at this point and that is absolutely depressing and i'll be honest this is a inside look into many people on uh instagram i literally play dress up at this point whenever i take a photo which I love doing. I just like taking pics. I wasn't wearing that outfit all day. Sometimes I was, but for the most part, I put it on just to take a picture. Is that fake? I feel like that's

fake, but it's literally like, well, I'm not doing much, but I want to look cute in my picture. So instead of wearing the hoodie and the sweats, I'm just going to put on the cute outfit and feel good about myself for, you know, 30 minutes while I have a photo shoot. And then I'll go back to my And then I literally like rip off my earrings, rip off all my, well, I usually keep my earrings on my shit. I like rip off my skirt or my crop top or whatever the fuck and my dress. And then I like throw on my sweats and then I just like sit down and post it. And I, and I think it's, it's, I'm disgusting, but that is why Instagram is not reality. And I've done a lot of those, like, you know, I even posted me last night, just me and my dog, you know, it's like,

that's literally how I'm looking all the time just sweats and everything but I feel like I got burned out I was looking at my Instagram like I just have like looky I have like girl in a hoodie chill vibes okay there's a fucking barking noise going on come on it's the neighbor's dog it's really loud it's like it squeals and I'm insecure that they can hear me through the door right now so I'm going to be quiet. But yeah, I was looking at my content. I'm like, I just like have hoodies on in every picture. What the fuck? So I've been like kind of upping my game, I guess. I don't know. I should reach out to brands. I want a brand to send me a free dress with like a discount code. And then I can like tell my followers to, you

know, swipe up or whatever. Instagram is a wasteland. I'm so burned out of it. I'm just burned out of the, the posing, man. I'm burned out of the posing. And it's like, I do it, but I don't know. I don't know. It's kind of, I don't know where we move on from here. It's like, I had the epiphany that the only way for me to be sane and feel normal and feel like myself is to share share my voice uh on my social media share my podcast share my raw thoughts uninterrupted for the length of a podcast every day because I feel like not to say that what I have on my social media is a bad representation of me I feel like it's so surface it's so like there's you can't decipher much about the way I think and you know my perspectives and my point of

from a fucking photo so I just got to the point I'm like what am I doing this for it's like every day is the same people post some photos post photos it's like I literally have I don't give a fuck about your photos anymore I'm like who are you there are so many people I follow that I'm like I I just I like you but I just want to know more and I don't know I'm kind of selfish like that but um I just decided like look I got a lead with a podcast I have this I have the seven days a week podcast that's my thing and then you know the bonus content is obviously the thirst trap every now and then and the selfie and the fucking here's a picture of my puppy and that just kind of go that's like the side gig instead of going starting with instagram being like okay i'm gonna

do the influencer shit and then like you know feeling like a knockoff version of myself because i'm just post everything is surface all right my mom oh we're texting right now she's gonna visit me I really hope she can come before Jimmy gets too big he's like getting heavy and when I hold him it's like it's it's getting kind of a lot I don't know I love him so much I feel like I fell in love with him officially what was it two days ago I reported that two days ago I think I said I forget what you're doing but yeah I looked because I've been questioning my love for my puppy for so like I don't think I was ready to feel his like I don't know like we bought it took a while for us to bond like that basically like the two souls bonding like the mother son whatever I don't

want to fucking he's my puppy he's my dog he's not my pupper he's not my doggo I'm not a dog mom no I think those are cute things to say but I like to I'm a basic bitch I call my dog I call my puppy um but anyways it like finally hit me like I was cuddling him I think two days ago and I was like whoa I love this I love you I'm officially fully fucking in love with you it is set in stone you're my you're my best friend and he's sleeping behind me right now hi he's he's a great dog I'm really excited to raise him and just watch him grow up but um why did I even bring him up forget where I was going with that all right I think I'm gonna end the episode uh right here I know are we coming up to an hour I never I never um time it

uh I guess I'll end this with a little reflection um I guess a question for you guys like do you enjoy because here's the thing I do a daily podcasts. And I think that nature, so like people that podcast throughout the week are usually talk about current events and news. Like that's the point. It's like every day there's an update of what happened the day before and what's going on in the world. So it's, it kind of makes sense that I would talk about current events on this, uh, on this podcast as a normal thing, but give me some feedback let me know um I enjoy it I enjoy like finding stuff to talk about um but I think it turns I feel negative though I know I'm negative a lot because this is my bitch session this is

like my this is literally my hour to rant and then I get it out and then I'm like a I'm like a peaceful little angel after who's just detoxed of all the bullshit in her brain and then I feel so much better and then I I'm it's it's amazing so I think the news kind of make it puts me in a negative mindset and uh I get really I get really fired up and pissed off and maybe that's fun to listen to so let me know if you enjoy that or I can just uh continue on the random life updates like literally just audio diary only talk about my just like what I did from the time I woke up to the time I went to bed. That's the normal format. And yeah. So what else do I want to talk about? I don't know. I think that's it. I do want to be self-disciplined. I do want to end the

podcast when I said I'm going to do it or when I said I'm going to end it. Sometimes I just like keep talking. I'll literally keep talking for another hour if I don't stop now. So thanks for hanging out. Hit that subscribe button. I'll be here tomorrow. I'm here seven days a week. and follow me on instagram uh just you know for the instagram content and then head over to patreon patreon patreon.com slash tjms to become a patron to get to get access to my bonus content and uh you get phone calls get shout outs every friday and yeah more of me if you're interested so patreon.com slash t j m s and finally I'm a clubhouse junkie I'm on clubhouse at club Jacqueline follow me there uh let's chat let's let's connect

all right love you guys hope you had a great Thursday and I will talk to you tomorrow bye