The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 225- Saturdaycast: Q&A #27

Episode Date: April 20, 2021

Happy Saturday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS 

Hey guys, happy Saturday. It's episode 225. Welcome back to the show. hi happy saturday q a number 27 let's get into it uh hi it's Jacqueline coming to you live from sunny San Diego it's the Jacqueline Monroe show holy shit I'm feeling awkward today I don't know how to explain my energy I just feel off and I feel like I'm in a funk I feel like I'm gonna trip up on my words today but I'm gonna muscle through this answer your questions and actually I'm not gonna answer your questions I'm gonna answer an OG 50 questions tag from YouTube from like 2009. Because you know what? This is going to sound selfish. And I like I don't give a fuck about my audience. I don't care about you care

about you. But like the same eight people ask me the same types of questions every week. And they go like this. Are you going to go back to Burnett? Can I wife you? What's your favorite kind of cheese? When are you coming to LA? When are you going to have guests on the podcast? Like the same fucking question. This sounds so insane. Like I should care about my audience. I should answer their questions. I'll just say this Romano cheese, no guests yet. Uh, I don't plan on going to LA anytime soon so anyways I just thought like instead of boring you with these with these boring ass questions I'm gonna bore you with different boring ass questions from like 2009 because I remembered sorry I'm just again something's off today just I get a pass something's

off I don't I don't know what it is but you know when you just you like you feel weird I'm like I'm sober I'm hydrated I just drank a liquid IV you know what it is I know I'm anxious because of this goddamn Jake Jake Paul fight tonight the Ben uh Jake Paul Ben Askren fight and I just want to watch that and I feel like I have shit to do before then including this podcast and I just I don't know I've spent money on it and so I'm like I don't want to fucking what was it like 50 bucks to watch it yeah so uh I'm just trying to like bust this out honestly and I'm sorry that's that's just the plan today. So here we go. Jimmy's playing with a water bottle. It's his new favorite toy. If you hear that in the background, it's he's playing with, yeah, my little crystal geyser

sparkling water. Okay. So this might be boring. Like these are honestly not exciting questions. Like first question is, were you named after anyone? Yes. Jacqueline Kennedy. Like these are going to be surface level basic boring basic bitch boring questions but I'm going to try to have fun with it these are questions a lot of them I haven't answered before so I'm gonna okay Jacqueline instead of explaining what you're gonna do just fucking do it all right today's episode is about I like to cut to the chase on Saturdays when I do the Q&A but today I'm failing okay first question were you named after anyone yes I was named after Jacqueline Kennedy and I don't know if I've told the story before but my mom was super pregnant with me

and she was down in Seattle for some reason and this was at the time when when Jacqueline Kennedy was dying of cancer and on one of the newspapers she saw on like a newsstand it said Jacqueline in big in big letters and she's she's like that's gonna be her name instead of I think my name was going to be like Roxanne or no, Raquel. It was like an R name. I don't know. Kind of like a rock star name. Um, she, I think she wanted to call me Rocky. Yeah. So I went from that to Jacqueline after she saw the newspaper and I don't know, that's my name. I don't, I don't think much about my name, but I do get questions a lot about like, are you related to Marilyn Monroe like ever I get that a lot or just um the whole like is your name

real thing which I don't understand I don't understand why my name wouldn't be real I think it's a very like 60s name I mean literally I have like the Jacqueline Kennedy first name and then Marilyn Monroe last name so I get how I don't know whatever that's that's where I got my name Now, you know, um, next question. What is your favorite lunch meat? This is actually a fun question. What's your favorite lunch meat? Um, okay. I like, I'm not really a big ham person. I don't like ham's not my jam. I like I love a roast beef Swiss situation um I love oh my fuck pastrami pastrami I mean turkey's great don't get me wrong a smoked turkey a roasted turkey with some like provolone cheese on a

sandwich a lot of you know like a good sourdough bread whatever like a basic turkey sandwich can't be beat that's amazing that's great but if I had to pick my favorite lunch meat like dude corned beef bitch what's is that pastrami is it the same thing that's so good same with roast beef it's all good I don't know what is corned beef what is wait what's pastrami dude I want a Reuben right now it's like my mom's favorite sandwich pastrami is a Romanian variant of the Turkish usually made from beef brisket hell yeah I'm fuck okay so I saw brisket I got excited if I so I'd rather have a barbecue sandwich of some kind like a pulled pork situation over any kind of lunch meat okay throw barbecue in my mouth at all times every fucking day that's all I want to

eat meat candy that's what that is barbecue like if you have really good barbecue it's like I'm like I don't want I don't want fucking Skittles I don't want chocolate I don't want any of that or cookies or cake I want it's like the meat is it's fucking candy it's so good so anyways pastrami is usually made from beef brisket uh the raw meat is brined partially dried seasoned with herbs and spices then smoked and steamed we love a pastrami here on the Jacqueline Monroe show. I got to go. Excuse me for doing that. Hey, Jim, I think that's going to pick up on the microphone if you keep swatting your water bottle. Yeah. Okay. Now he's going to come bite my wrist. Great. Anyways, it says that pastrami is beef navel, beef belly button. So I like beef

belly button is that what that is what are the difference differences between corn beef pastrami and montreal smoked meat that's my okay who wants to be my boyfriend and go to that new york deli where they have those giant ass pastrami sandwiches like who wants to do that hit me up my dms are open i want to do like a new york city food fan or food food fuck fest food fucking tour what are they called I just like that's one that's my bucket list thing or whatever one of my bucket list things is uh a New York a food trip to New York like I'm just there to eat that's it eat fuck all right moving on so wait what was I going to read corned beef oh the difference between corned beef pastrami and match we're learning shit today this is an educational Q&A

yeah corned beef is Irish okay pastrami is Romanian um anyways there's literally like a fucking 15 paragraph essay on this foodandwine.com website about the differences I don't have time for this shit let's do another question um next next question do you like your handwriting god again I know this is like a this is kind of a boring question Q&A I mean I like it for me I like my handwriting for me like I feel like it fits me because it shows that like if you saw my handwriting you'd be like that is definitely a feminine woman who is smart like she's this is a girl's handwriting I don't know why it's important for me to come across as a fucking feminine woman feminine girl why the fuck because it's like cute okay I have girly

handwriting but it's also shitty at the same time because that shows that I have that my brain works faster than my hand and I'm intelligent which is also important to me that I'm not a dumb blonde because now that I'm blonde I don't want to be the well why do I give a fuck who cares who cares about brains it's all about the beauty not the brains let's be honest um he's chewing my flip flop jimmy i've had those tommy hill hillfiger flip-flops since i worked at tommy hillfiger he's not gonna fucking he's not gonna ruin these right now i move i gotta move the laptop and walk over here jim let's get some salmon treats we're gonna eat salmon instead of the shoe yeah he's got fucking poke some holes in the bottom of this damn it i'm doing this one-handed i gotta set the

laptop down on the ground to do two hands oh i'm opening his jaw this is live on the podcast ass parenting my child there we go okay Jim now we're gonna get the salmon I got him these salmon treats because he hasn't had salmon yet salmon so fucking annoying all right oh you sat down perfectly there you go bud yummy salmon okay yeah what are these called they're um wilderness trail treats wild bites salmon recipe they're training treats so I gave them like 10 so it feels like a big snack instead of just a little treat okay um I'm trying to fatten his ass up let's be honest um what was I just on oh handwriting you know I have a theory about handwriting so yeah I like mine whatever it's all good um I have a theory about handwriting and that is that um okay

should i describe mine again did i already do that okay i have like the comp my handwriting is the combination it's a combination of the left-handed retard oh i can't say that the left-handed degenerate kid in your class who never did his homework never tried hard sucked at everything in school wanted to drop out like he was that disrespectful kid to the teachers his fucking backpack was just full of papers all the time it was always unzipped he like held his pencil like he was like you know how the Italians do this with your hand right now you guys if you know what I'm talking about you know what I'm talking about take your hand take your left or right hand and do that Italian thing like when they have the accent and they do like the hand

motion and their fingers are sticking like towards the sky like your your wrist okay your fingers are pointed up now take your hand and flip it down the kids with the fucked up handwriting held their pencil like that and anyways so I have a good so my handwriting is a combination of that and um like they would have to get trained I remember that they said they had these those kids have those stupid fucking pencil trainers to like teach them how to hold their pencil right and they like didn't give a fuck so they like I remember my teacher I'm thinking the third thing is right now I'm thinking of a specific kid and I know this sounds fucked up but it's true I remember my teacher I think it was second grade when he started like I don't know learning how to

write properly this is so fun I'm literally making fun of a kid who honestly he wasn't mentally he didn't have a he wasn't born with a disability he literally just didn't give a fuck about school and he like purposely pissed the teachers off just because which I respect that like he knew well I get it I get it now but like whatever live your life who gives a fuck um he was the one kid in class that was like this but I remember in like second grade he got one of those pencil trainers on his pencil from the teacher and he just like fucking ripped it off and like didn't care anyways so yeah my handwriting back to what I was saying my handwriting is a combination of that and then it's like the middle ground between that and then a

girl who has perfect handwriting and she literally she writes in her own font it's yeah so I'm in the middle all right so my theory about handwriting is that like this is one of my biggest jealousies in life um what well my first one I just became that it just got it was just blasted in my face on another goddamn tiktok of a bridal shower situation um I think my biggest jealousy now my 20s we're not talking about my handwriting we're on a tangent just ride with me all right I'm starting to realize that one of my biggest jealousies is like women my age with a fuck ton of friends and like people like they can have like 14 bridesmaids and shit because they have

that many friends and that many people in their circle and I'm honestly super fucking jealous of that and I'm trying to be easy on myself because a lot of my life choices have have like put me in this isolated box you know what I mean like I don't really like as soon as I moved to San Diego go I could have joined every little group I could have put myself out there got on bumble to meet friends like girls I could have tried hard I could have like gone to workout classes consistently and like always saw the same people that ended up being their friends blah blah I didn't fucking do that okay and dude I want to do that not really um in my experience like here's the thing I've been working on my my own shit I've been grinding kind of on my own I'm kind of doing my

thing right now and I'm just like look I got my whole life to make friends I know things get better after 30 my 20s have been kind of a weird like roller coaster lately I feel like every couple years things are dramatically different than the two years before anyways um so yeah that's my current well one of the jealousies that I'm starting to have intensely because I'm like who the fuck am I gonna invite to my why do I give a fuck about first of all I'm not one of those girls who cares about my wedding that much or like dreams about it or cares about like my I don't like think about my wedding at all I don't even like it's not even in my brain 90 like literally I haven't even mentioned what or thought about it until this podcast and like

for the last who the fuck knows like a year or two so I don't know why I'm so hung up on like having a bunch of girlfriends I feel like it's I I feel like that would make my life better which it probably would I just it um someday okay I keep saying that and I know you guys are probably disappointed in me uh all the all the daily daily listeners are probably like Jacqueline what the fuck when are you gonna have when are you gonna become the socialite of San Diego that you want to be and to answer your question um I think when I I keep putting like my brain in in July I'm like I think July I'm gonna really just like go out and try hard at all that stuff because I've been I've been um I've been in like work mode I've been in training my like I have a

puppy I'm a full-time puppy mom now these are stupid excuses um I podcast seven days a week I do a lot of shit uh I work I work fucking hard right now and so I feel like that's a stupid