The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 253- Saturdaycast: Q&A #31

Episode Date: May 16, 2021

Happy Saturday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS 

What's up, guys? Happy Saturday. It's episode 253. Welcome back to the show. hey guys what's up it's Jacqueline welcome back to the show uh Q&A number 31 today wow this means I've yeah this means I've podcasted 31 weeks in a row so anyways I mean look I know it might be premature to give you some Monday motivation on a Saturday but look if I can do it you can do it follow your fucking dreams I said I wanted to be a podcast a daily podcast host I'm a daily podcast host I've been doing this for 31 weeks That's so weird to think about. 31 weeks of podcasting. Anyways, look, I got a story to tell before I jump into the questions. And before I say the story, please hit that subscribe button.

I'm here seven days a week. And if you want to support the show, if you want to support my Patreon, head over to patreon.com slash TJMS and check it out. That'll give you access to my uh, exclusive content behind a paywall because, uh, you got to pay to play. There's no such thing as, I feel like I'm repeating myself. There's no such thing as a free lunch in this country, in this world. It's pay to play. If you want access to me, uh, if you want access to my behind the scenes content, uh, it's five bucks a month. Go check it out. Patreon.com slash TJMS. so yeah uh I held a homeless man's hand today uh and I need to tell a story about what happened so it's the morning I walked to Starbucks

okay I got my iced coffee I haven't gone to Starbucks in forever so took Jimmy on a walk to Starbucks and of course people stop and they want to pet him they want to say hi and you know I'm always down for that I'm always up for it and I don't care if you're homeless I don't care if you're in a car and you reach out the window as you're driving to pet him like I don't give a fuck anyone's allowed to pet him so anyways we're on the way to Starbucks and we're going under a bridge. Uh, it's under a freeway bridge on the way there from my place. And this nice little man on a few boxes, a few flattened cardboard boxes. Um, you know, I think he, it was the morning, you know, he just woke up maybe, I don't know. He, he definitely slept on the boxes that

night or last night. So, uh, of course, Jimmy's excited to see him. Jimmy likes people more than like Jimmy approaches uh if there's a if there's a person walking their dog Jimmy will want he'll be more interested in the person than the dog like he wants to say hi to every person he sees not necessarily every dog okay anyways so Jimmy's like oh my god a person a little man on the street so he runs up to him the homeless man starts petting him like you know like oh you know hello, cute puppy. What's his name? Oh, you know, he's all, he's super, he was a super cool guy. Like just like an older man and Jimmy's teething. Right. And so I have to tell people like, just, you know, he bites a little bit and I have to kind of watch Jimmy's mouth so he doesn't bite them.

And anyways, he got his wrist, Jimmy bit his, just like held onto it and his, and his, uh, his wrist and his like coat a little bit and so I'm breaking up his jaw from the man's arm and the guy holds my hand we touched hands like as I was taking his you know like as I'm breaking up the situation our hands touched and then he held my hand and he just held it and I was like this is fucking awkward I don't know if this like you know what I mean I'm like I feel uncomfortable and he literally says the homeless man literally goes this broke my fucking heart and I felt like you know what all I don't care we're all we're all in this together this life we're all trying to make it be happy and you know enjoy ourselves and he goes oh I'm sorry he goes fuck mom you're

gonna cry when you hear this because my mom cries at any homeless man she sees or homeless woman or like she'll see someone on the side of the street and immediately shed a tear so he goes oh I'm sorry um oh sorry I haven't held a woman's hand in a while or in a lot in a very long time he's like I don't know did I deliver that I was gonna make it sound like better than that but he literally yeah he's like I haven't I haven't held a woman's hand in a while sorry I apologize what did he say like oh sweetie I think he said like sweetie or honey yeah he said honey honey sorry to scare you I haven't held a woman's hand in a while you know when something happens and you're like what the fuck just happened I don't really remember it that well it went along

the lines of that and we just broke away and I kept walking Jimmy and that was it but there's a story before I do the questions and answers today. There you go. That was my morning and I'm drinking. I went to Starbucks. Um, I re I haven't bought coffee or I haven't gotten a nice coffee for myself and, um, cause I make them at home and so long. So I get an iced, I get a triple blonde shot on ice and a grande cup with cold foam. It's really good. And I got just like ice. It's like melted now but I was tired of shit last night on um the podcast and I feel like I have to bring it today but to be honest I'm also tired of shit today so I don't know let's do a Q&A so we're gonna continue the list from last week of like what's this what's this list called hold on let

me pull it up um I'm not taking questions from Instagram today I'm taking questions from Reddit but these are like interesting questions to ask people, random questions. They really get my mind going. I love doing this because, uh, fuck I get it. I go on. So I get, let's just, let's just like flatline this right now. Let's take a break, Jacqueline. Let's just, you know what? It's my podcast. I'm going to deep breathe through these caffeine jitters. Get my head around what I want to say next and then I'll continue. It's like when you're at the AMC or you see the AMC commercial at a movie theater. It's like silence is golden. There you go. I need to be more silent or I need to let myself pause more while I podcast. The great thing about doing

these questions or taking these questions from Reddit is that I don't know what I'm going to talk about. A bunch of random topics get brought up to me and I go on tangents and I tell stories about random things and it's so fun. So yeah, like the first question, I don't want to do a depressing one. What song do I want played at my funeral? Eagles Wings. Eagles Wings. If you're a Catholic, you probably know what that is. And he will, should I sing it? This is what my mom says. Like whenever we're in church, she's like, play this at my funeral. Anytime she hears this song she says play this at my funeral and it makes me so fucking depressed i'm like mom shut up and he will raise you up on eagle swings bear you on the breath of dawn actually i just i know what

song i want played at my funeral uh the ever after theme song the airbud theme song or like background music um dude and I'm I'm getting pickled bitch I'm getting pickled have I discussed this yet dude when I die I've said this before when I die pickle me I want to be the first pickled person I want to be put in a jar like a pickle fucking pickle me um fuck a cremation fuck a casket I want to be on display in a national museum as a pickle as a pickled human being and I could be wearing a cool outfit dude I could see here's that's what I'm telling you I just I come up with those random shit on the on these Q&A's okay um um next question professional truck drivers what are some tips for people who are new at driving trucks

Um, okay. I mean, I'm not like a trucker, but I used to drive a truck to high school. And here's what I'll say. This is what people need to understand about driving a truck or any car. This is what they need to understand about backing up. Okay. It's all about looking down the, Okay, so when you're backing up, look over your right shoulder straight down the middle of the car at the back. How do I explain this? Bend over, twist to the right and look back and back up that way and then steer with your left hand. Don't, like people when they back up who are using their mirrors, I'm like, what are you doing? You can easily back up if you just look behind the car.

like whenever I parallel park I do this I mean I use my mirrors a little bit obviously but um when I drive trucks are so easy to back up because you're high up and I don't know it's like you just have like the bed in the back and you I don't you don't have any like obstructions so yeah um that's my tip for new truck drivers uh twist twist twist to the right back up you don't need to yeah you don't need to like sit forward all propped up and back up looking through your side mirrors and your rear view mirror it's a clusterfuck that way you gotta sit you gotta like turn your body and trust you gotta trust that your steering on your left hand will guide you as you look back so yeah anyways um fuck uh next question what is the best

video game ever oh peter rabbit no that was like a elementary school thing um I would say actually I was thinking about Guitar Hero Guitar Hero today I was thinking about that in the car um hmm what video games did I play like the most that I enjoyed the most I liked okay on the computer the best computer video game is VMK Virtual Magic Kingdom a Disney video game um and then on the xbox i got the most i feel like because of my brother and xbox live like i i played halo i played halo 3 the most and i enjoyed that the most out of any video game

so i'm gonna say that i haven't played video games in years um actually i kind of want to get like i was thinking about this too speaking of guitar hero i was like i want to get a setup i want to have a guitar i want to have i want to i want a guitar gotta do another break we gotta do another pause i'm so jacked up it's like my tummy feels like it has butterflies and i'm too excited to talk holy shit um I want a Guitar Hero setup. Moving on. Next question. Jesus. Scroll, scroll, scroll.

People panic buying gas. How do you plan on using all that gas before it goes bad in a few months? I'm not panic buying gas um what is what are the comments on this I feel like yeah there's a there's a shortage or whatever because the fucking pipeline takeover or what did they the they held at ransom or something like did I I don't really follow the news that closely but I hear little bits and pieces of what people are saying or like what people are posting so in my brain i'm like someone held the pipeline hostage and stood by it and was like this is like you have to pay for this or you're not getting it back or something like that i don't get it all i know is that there's a lot of memes going around about joe biden and gas prices and the gas

shortage and anyways but um yeah so gas goes bad after a few months so what are people saying soak it up with all their ex's toilet paper that they bought last year that's funny yeah there's a breed of american out there or human being out there that is fucking insane like the toilet paper people from last year and now the gas people and like that are is it a lack of it's i feel like they're so i don't know they're like so convinced that i don't know they're kind of like doomsday prepper people types that are really convinced like everything's gonna go to shit everything's i mean it could like i don't know but i don't operate in fear i don't operate in

oh I need to conserve and hoard and stock up I'm honestly game for surviving with what I have I know that sounds fucked up but like I don't know like if everything got if everything went to shit in this country I'd be like okay what are my what kind of reason like I would go I would I would be on a scavenger hunt every day it'd be so fun I just need a gun I don't know why I haven't gotten a gun yet that that would be the game changer for me I feel like you know what I don't need to stock up I just need a gun and I'd feel I'd feel uh like prepared for anything like I don't know what am I saying like Jacqueline just do the next question Jesus um i'm serious though i feel like you know

in 2021 i gotta start packing i don't know what's gonna happen next but i feel like it's that'd be a good thing to do what is your current mental status next question um i feel like i've been super excited lately for like the summer, just things opening back up and events happening again and people coming together again in a normal way. Like I've been excited lately. Um, and just in general, I feel like overall I've been really good. Like everything, you know, when you're, you have a lot of momentum with everything you're doing, especially with like your personal goals, your professional goals your financial like everything is building on top of each other

in a really good way like I feel like I'm in that place right now so I feel like that's helping my mental health I'm I'm like mentally good because of that but like I don't know um not every day is perfect but I usually feel overall like happy and fulfilled and what I'm doing and yeah like excited I don't know does anyone else feel like that I just feel excited about life again after 2020 and after everything that happened I'm like shit it sounded like a fucking party this summer already and it's like or just people are really talking I mean it's already but it's let's let's be honest it's been going on this entire time but um there's like an energy shift that's happening right now that's really yeah exciting can I say exciting anymore um

but look you know okay so I know I just brought up fucking packing a gun but like literally what's this question what's your mental status this is what's wild about I don't know if this is like a podcast host thing or uh like when you talk out a story or or narrate something or host a show or whatever this is just in general you could be having a conversation with a person but what's wild I don't know I think this might be just my brain while I was saying that I think it'd be smart for me to get a gun or whatever I was saying that right I was just podcasting through that little segment and then and at the same time my mind was creating a story like a Hunger Games story in my head where I'm Katniss

Everdeen packing my fucking gun surviving an apocalypse like an apocalyptic event or like where i need to go get gas and people are like shooting at me or whatever like i literally just like my brain was in a it like created a fucking movie in my head while i was talking and saying something completely different what the fuck like just does anyone get this where you can literally be you can be talking like that's the crazy thing you can talk and have a side story happen is this schizophrenia, holy fuck, is this what that, am I borderline, is this, hey, uh, doctors out there, shoot me a DM, what does that, what does that mean, like, I can literally have a whole different, it's like my subconscious, or my, um, you know how you have that little voice in your head,

mine's a little voice in my head but i have like it sees pictures it tells a little story as i'm thinking about it i don't know how to explain this but i can be talking and verbalizing something completely completely different at the exact same time it's simultaneous simultaneous simultaneous is that a word yes i will do shout out starbucks you just unlocked some weird shit in my brain i I just literally created this, like, I, I thought, oh, okay. So if I had a gun and people were, you know, there was a gas shortage to the point where I had to like go fend, I don't know, like fend for it or whatever, scavenge for it.

I don't know. Jacqueline just answered another fucking question. So I want, this is like, this is a, this is one of those episodes where I think my regular listen, listeners will like see through it and they won't over they won't feel like they won't be nervous for me or they won't um be worried for me and then they'll this is like a this is like a walk in the park for them this kind of behavior I'm putting on today or acting out today but for new people they're probably like yeah get your head checked bitch like what's happening I don't know

And I'm not even, I'm not even worried about admitting that. Like, I get, my brain just goes fucking places and I don't know why. Next question. Who are some successful people who didn't get their shit together until after they were 35? I feel like Gary Vee talks about this. Like, I don't know. I feel like he's one of those people. gary v i'm gonna answer this with gary v i don't like this i don't know

successful after 35 there's so many people a lot of like entrepreneurs and thought leaders and people that we look up to now like the tony robbins type people like i feel like a lot of them figured shit out later in life and now they're they do a lot of public speaking and like ted talks and but they're a lot older than like someone in their 20s they're like grown and mature and um they found success later in life i don't know a lot of people so many people um next question what movie good guy would definitely be considered a bad guy in real life um who's a good guy in a movie that should be a bad that would be a bad guy in real life

I don't know I don't know do I have to I don't have to answer I can't think of this wait who's a good guy oh it's been said I'm gonna switch this to um girls in Mean Girls the villain isn't Regina George it's um the lesbian girl the uh what's her name fuck Regina Katie Heron Regina it's like candace no it's not hold on uh mean girls characters why can't i think of her name do you know the black hair girl that um hey janice what's your wig wig made out of your mom's chest hair it's janice and okay janice is actually the villain in that movie but everyone thinks regina george is the villain it's really janice so there there's a answer to that fucking

question I switched it from guys to girls I don't know like who's a good guy in a movie that would be a bad guy in real life I don't know I just like it's one of those things where I'm like I don't really want to think about this too much I want to do a different question what smells oh no I can't answer that one I read that really fast dude my okay legit this is annoying also if you're like for regular listeners they're probably like okay this happens every now and then she talks about how cracked out on caffeine she is and how oh my god her brain is like going 100 miles an hour but but like so for i'm gonna keep saying new people

versus old people i guess but uh yeah the new people are probably what the like what the fuck something's in starbucks coffee today in this starbucks coffee today that's uh i don't know what it is i feel different bitch eat some breakfast bitch eat breakfast what are you doing that's the thing i drink coffee on an empty stomach i don't eat breakfast usually i drink coffee and i feel like this is a little bit too extreme like there's nothing soaking this up should i eat the ice cubes i'm gonna be embarrassed by this episode in a week from now or actually as soon as i post it but fuck it um who's entertained i hope you're still here if you've continued if you're still

here right now. Holy shit. I'm a circus clown. I'm a fucking circus clown. Circus clown. My dad used to call me the Joker. I mean, fuck. I'm that. I think I am. I'm whacked out. I'm weird. I don't fucking like this about myself, though. I don't want to be like this. This is the thing. I'm conflicted I'm like look this is psychotic I literally what is the sign what is early signs of schizophrenia oh my god am I fucking who googles this shit about themselves okay schizophrenia is characterized by and first of all I shouldn't be joking about something like this but I don't know I'm you you guys all have been there before you've been there you're don't act like I'm I'm not that we've all been here before you drink a lot of caffeine and you're

just like you need I need to go on a run it's that kind of thing I need to work out but what's happened like you know when you're amped this is what it is we've all been here you're on the way to the gym you drink your pre-workout you're blasting music and you're just like you got to release that energy somewhere so instead of me lifting weights or going on a run or doing a hardcore like HIIT workout to get this energy out I'm talking it out and it's sound I literally sound insane and I'm and to the point where I'm googling the early signs of schizophrenia god bless this day god bless this life all right schizophrenia is characterized by thoughts or experiences that seem out of touch with reality disorder disorganized speech or behavior

and decreased participation in daily activities difficulty with concentration and memory memory may also be present so i'm highlighting disorganized speech or behavior uh that's uh i feel like that's what's going on right now people may experience social isolation disorganized behavior compulsive behavior excitability hostility definitely I'm not hostile at all I'm overthinking this shit I'm fucking having fun you know what and I'm saying literally this is the thing that I love about podcasting and I and I know it's like not for everyone this shows I'm not I know that like I know this is probably super fucking entertaining

for some people not for other people but that's how content on the internet is you you can like pick and choose what you like and don't like but um what I love about podcasting is that it's just this is a complete stream of consciousness you guys are literally getting inside my brain right now and you're seeing you're seeing it without a filter or you're hearing it without a filter because I don't edit the show I don't pre-meditate what I'm going to say and I'm discovering as I'm podcasting on this Q&A today that uh this is I'm like maxing out what's possible with my brain right now I'm like holy shit we don't understand the brain we don't understand I wish we had more answers you know what I mean

that's one thing I'm like we got it's literally like a fucking squishy meatball operating a meat meat sack underneath it or a meat shop I got a fucking butcher shop under my brain that's walking around and it's just like it's like the pilot of me and we don't understand

like does anyone freak out by this stuff or like I saw this really cool I think I reposted it on my story a few days ago they did a brain scan where you could see the blood like pumping in the brain and like the brain pulsing and moving as the person was

like alive you know what i mean it was such a it's a mind fuck it's like this is i don't know and that's why when people this is what's also weird for me to that i something weird i think about or trippy that i think about is when people talk about the simulation oh we're living in a simulation I'm like I think of pixels I think of robotic um no I think of pixels I think of a simulation being a bunch of say it again pixels like on a screen like when we're playing like if you play the sims on your computer that's how my brain sees like oh if we were in a simulation like that's how everything would be but we're full of blood and cells and squishy shit and organs and every living thing

on the planet is like like like why does why does why is photosynthesis why is photosynthesis synthesis a thing you know what i mean like it doesn't make sense in my brain i'm like the sun the plants are sucking out carbon from the atmosphere and they're turning it into oxygen did i say that correctly something like that butterflies fucking metamorphosis why you know and it's like if it was a simulation i feel like it'd be a lot more abc123 than than that less complicated and more like yeah like little pixels and i know if we're in the fucking like the people on tiktok say all these like woke down or not even woke down they're uh in deep with a like i don't know the meaning of life shit or like the yeah simulation stuff they're like oh

we're in the third density of the fifth dimension of the universe and we're so far away from the source that we're so advanced the point of like yeah there are cells and there are little tiny microscopic plankton in the ocean and mitochondria and nuclei and little baby tiny atoms and then like everything is there's so many little particles how the fuck could this be created and how could this be a simulation if it i don't know does that make sense like there's things are so tiny i'm sitting at an old wood desk this is vintage from the early 1900s this has a this used to be a tree and this thing has memory bitch like this thing had a life this thing I'm looking at some swirls on it how schizophrenic this is probably the most schizophrenic I've ever seen

in my life I'm or is this just is it is this just a wild imagination and creativity I said this last year crazy is the new normal if you didn't go fucking crazy in 2020 I don't trust you i don't fucking get it who how was that possible like if you're not at this level of sitting alone on a saturday talking about swirls on your desk from a tree from the early 1900s like what the fuck are you doing who are like it's not crazy it's uh it's uh it's me bitch it's just it's just how i think sometimes when i over caffeinate And we're transitioning to sparkling water to flush out the caffeine.

I don't know. Shut up, Jacqueline. Stop talking about coffee. No one wants to hear about it. But, yeah, you know what I mean? Like this used to be a tree. Someone cut it down. And if I look really close, there's like little tiny baby particles.

Okay, because, yeah, back to what I was saying about pixels. And if we were in a simulation, I just don't get it. lately I'd say over the last six months I've been hyper I've developed a heightened awareness or a heightened intrigue and curiosity about this universe and this life in a different way and I feel like yeah okay TikTok is really influencing me and it's kind of cool though like I I appreciate all the people out there talking about because I've learned I've learned a lot and I've I've developed new

ideas and perspectives about it all and of course like I always say like I don't know the answer no one fucking does but it's interesting to hear about and to like think about but and that's why I have this, um, as far as my, as far as my life goes, I have this goal with myself and my life to like create something beautiful and loving and full and, you know, especially with relationships and maybe eventually building a family. Like, I just feel like we're never going to know the answers I don't want to go crazy in the meantime it's like okay don't go crazy trying to find the answers find a man get married have some kids get a dog we'll get another dog like just focus on that kind of stuff and not the what's the meaning of life shit because I will literally never will

never I won't know until we and until I die and that's just and I'm at peace with that I'm not trying I don't I don't want to go yeah I don't want to like go insane and like make it my life mission to find the answers because it's like fun like I'm in a phase right now I'm in a phase mom it's just a phase mom is that what the quote is it's just mom it's just a phase I'm definitely in a phase now of like being curious and really thinking about it but um I don't know I just want to like live life and have fun moving forward speaking about being excited about the summer like I just want to go bump in the bump in the club and get sloppy and hang out with people and you know have deep conversations and you know go on vacations again and

like live life and i don't want to be so in my fucking head about i don't get it like we have cells and blood and mitochondria and there's plankton in the ocean there's so many little particles everywhere like i don't get it because if it was the simulation when it just be like pixels like imagine if our bodies were just like a bunch of little squares like little pixels. Okay. Jacqueline fucking a do another question. I'm going to stop reading about schizophrenia. How to accept yourself on Google, how to accept your neuro diversity. That's what this bitch is. I'm, I'm neurally diverse in my own way. I don't think it could be diagnosed. I don't think, I don't like diagnoses. I don't like labels. I don't like

that shit I just like uh shit how do I say this that's the thing I don't be like oh you know what she's maybe I'm ADHD today tomorrow I won't be you know what I mean the caffeine brings it out sometimes and the thing is though my brain works faster than my mouth and I don't know like I struggle with this because for the longest time I've been insecure when I talk in a professional setting because I see the picture in my brain I see like in my brain it makes sense but when I verbalize it sometimes I trip up a little bit because I'm thinking faster than I'm talking I don't know if that's a it's not necessarily a good thing when you're having a conversation when you're trying to get your points across and make it make sense to other

people, but it's kind of fucking, it's kind of fucking skillful, right? It's kind of fucking cool. It's like some genius shit, right? Not to toot my own horn, but sometimes I'm like, Jesus Christ, keep up, bitches. Think faster. Communication is actually probably a better skill than having a brain that works really fucking fast i mean my brain's it's like it's like usain bolt versus the turtles bitch sometimes it's like i don't know how can we support neurodiversity is neurodiversity a good thing question mark on google these may seem like academic disputes ultimately many people with conditions like autism find that the term neuro neurodiversity and it and its contrast neurotypical is a useful

and positive way of self-defining their identity and their community there's certainly a need to reduce the stigma you know what i'll take this over fucking having anxiety and uh major depression like i struggle with depression i've never struggled with like anxiety in the um no I really haven't I don't get I don't have the anxiety thing I definitely have the depression thing if I get in a phase or a funk but I'd rather have this shit where I'm sitting here questioning my sanity than being anxious about like walking into the grocery store or like being in public spaces or fucking getting COVID like nervous like I'd rather have this shit I'd rather be this than like oh fuck someone's closer than six feet from me I'm gonna get COVID and like

i don't want to be i'm dude i'd rather be this than be a hypochondriac or be like like uh anxious all the time and have chest pain because i or that what's the anxiety chest thing people get like a heavy chest like an elephant sitting on their chest because they're so scared and having a panic attack i'd take this any day over that this is fun as shit this is fun as fuck but i feel here's the only reason i'm dissecting this on the q a on a saturday i've answered like three questions. The only reason I'm sitting here overthinking, analyzing, explaining, Googling is because I feel a little bit embarrassed in front of you listening right now and to control that to control that I'm explaining

myself I'm like I'm rationalizing I'm like hey well you know what actually I'm okay I'm actually you know at least it's better than being uh having anxiety or being depressed and sleeping all day that's where you get that's where you get free in life when you stop when you realize like like it's like you can't be embarrassed by anything you don't let yourself get embarrassed by anything or anxious about anything because you're just like you're just rolling you're in flow you're just like jimmy just picked up my fucking starbucks buddy get off you're just in the flow you don't give a fuck and you accept yourself exactly where you're at right now and

you have compassion like I have compassion I have compassion not only for that homeless man who held my hand this morning who uh you know felt something when we locked knuckles but because I feel bad for like that situation a lot but I have compassion for the fact that I didn't eat I didn't eat breakfast this morning I over caffeinated and I got on a fucking microphone and I sound insane to me or maybe because I think you guys think I sound I just don't answer another question let's have another let's do another question what cliches are the most true despite being used used so much cliches cliches cliches

the whole like everything happens for a reason thing I feel like that's I think girls say like a lot of girls are like everything happens for a reason and it was meant to be I feel like that those are overused or they're used a lot but I don't know that gives me um um whenever I say that I feel like it just makes you feel better it's like well everything happens for a reason I do believe that though I really believe that you are you are exactly where you're supposed to be right now everything you do is exactly what you were supposed to do every challenge you encountered every obstacle yeah every bad experience you have is supposed to happen it because of

i think and here's the thing about like yeah back to the spiritual like what's the meaning of life universe ship i truly believe that yes we are the universe experiencing itself and if you look at every person on this planet and every emotion and every like yeah emotion and um feeling in your in their body and uh like a high and a low day and a sad day and a happy day if you look across the board we are all having similar we all experience similar shit and so i think those yeah what i what i said about like oh wherever you are right now is exactly where you're supposed to be or those bad days you're having you're supposed to have them because it's life you're that's part of life it's part of life it's

part of the universe or whatever experiencing itself is you have to go through all that shit to be alive and to learn and to grow and to write it's like you're on a fucking this is what it is you're on a roller coaster and sometimes you go upside down and things are shitty and then you flip over and then everything's like flat and good and you're chilling and then you go down really far and your stomach drops it's like that's life i know this is a cliche in itself that life is a roller coaster but paint a picture um i invite every emotion i invite every high and low and happy and sad and um any yeah love hate all this shit's part of life and so um whenever you're like oh fuck oh fuck why me why does this keep happening blah blah blah it's like

well there's a that's usually a I'd say a mindset uh an opportunity to adjust your mindset I won't say it's a mindset problem I think it's an opportunity to um like correct your the way you see things but that's just part of life sometimes yeah yeah why why does this keep happening like sometimes when it shits it pours or what the fuck and when it rains it pours and it's like one thing after another thing after another thing and you're like why me why me why does this keep happening and you're gonna get through to the other side eventually everything nothing lasts forever my first boyfriend told me that he goes is that a red flag first thing he said to me was like I don't even know we were having a conversation he said something like

nothing he's in a British accent nothing lasts forever nothing lasts forever I think we were it's Subway. Yeah. And he said that across the table. So cliches. What are, what cliches are the most true despite being used too much? Let's read the comments on here. It wasn't meant to be. Okay. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Life better give you some sugar or your lemonade is gonna suck okay don't judge a book by its cover used so often but so true yeah that's very true that's why I wanted to create a podcast to be honest um I've concluded that we're not getting away from social media anytime soon or moving forward we're all going to be some sort of avatar of ourself online where people people's perception of you

is what they see online a lot of a lot of the times first it's like how it's like what you lead with your profiles are what you lead with now in business and relationships and everything and it represents who you are and so the that's like a reality that's just like what it is now So my mindset or my thought about podcasting was like, okay, how can I close the gap between who I am in person and who I am online? And I'm like, oh, podcast, hang out with people on a microphone, just like be yourself 100% raw, like as if we're friends forever and you're hanging out with me and you're at my, you're in my apartment right now hanging out on my couch listening and we're having a conversation. Like this is the, and there's so many other reasons for podcasting and why I love it and why I do it. But I think, yeah, if you were to breeze by my profile, like you don't really get a, you

get like little data points of who I am, little pictures and little, oh fuck, Jimmy, he just took the whole coffee. It's ice. He's going to eat the ice. He's so fucking cute. He's six months old today. holy shit anyways you get little data point points of me little pictures little like stories little but you don't get the you don't get the long form version of me you don't get the

what do I think or how do I talk or what do I what's my vibe like what about vibe you know even you I struggled with YouTube because I started making little YouTube vlogs for fun I love editing video it's like one of my favorite things to do anyways and I love shooting video I love video and I get it from my dad and I struggle with YouTube because I'm like this is all curated and edited and I'm chopping it up and I'm making everything like look a certain way and it wasn't like super raw I don't know you can totally make YouTube videos that way but I I made the like 10 minute vlogs and I don't know I felt like a fake I just felt like I was kind of fake in it I wasn't I was like doing all the typical like YouTube like vlog like hi what's

up guys welcome back to my channel today we're gonna you know we're here it's like a phone call it's a one-on-one it's the best it's the best way to connect with people on the internet now period and it has a lot it's got legs like podcasting isn't going anywhere um I want to have a presence I want to have a presence online somewhere I want to have a little I want to be part of the pocket of the internet I want to I want to be in my own little corner of the internet or I want to have a yeah what's it called my skin in the game just because of how we're all online now like I don't want to just be some like and here's the thing does she need attention what is she seeking by talking on by podcasting

every day like I don't know to me it's like I'm not an attention whore I don't I legitimately don't feel that way I feel like I have a lot of clearly a lot of shit in my head and I love like it's creativity it's expression it's art that's what podcasting to me is it's not so much like oh like oh my god let me tell you all my problems every day and let me tell you all about me it's all about me me me me I need attention everyone like look at me look at me listen my podcast no fuck no like I literally don't even tell people like okay I post a picture every now and then I'm like oh this is how many days of podcasting I've been doing because for one year I'm doing it every single day and that's it I'm not like trying to get big and like promote

this and I don't know get picked up by a network or you know I'm not I feel like people I'm not in it for the short term like or like the short term like that I'm in it for like I just love it as a hobby and if people like it and they listen to it great end of story I don't want to put pressure on myself unnecessary pressure to be somebody or like be in a big podcast like it's not I don't give a fuck like that's cool but I'm not that's not even in the back of my head to be honest, that's not even in the back of my head. I don't like, here's the thing. I'm starting to get disgusted. I'm on a new tangent. I don't even know where was I out on the, I was on the cliche question. Um, I'm starting to see things differently with Instagram and social media

influencer type people especially my age group and other women like I'm not to like not even other women it's just like do whatever makes you happy do what you want to do but I don't want to be like here's what here's the thing I don't want to have hundreds of thousands of followers and I don't want to be verified and I don't want to be half naked in every picture and with an OnlyFans and like swipe up 20% off my fucking cacao powder and my fucking bikinis on sale like I don't want to be that at all and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with it but like I I think it's it's kind of ran it's kind of ran its course I think it's ran its course to the point where now I'm seeing it and I'm kind of put off by it and I'm just kind of like

I want to be more private I want to okay yeah okay shut the fuck up you podcast every day you talk about everything. I want to be more like, um, low key. You know what I mean? Like, I don't want to, I don't, I just don't want to be like a look at me. I want to be big. I want to be, I don't know. I just, it don't have it in me. It's not like a, I think that used to be a goal of mine when I was younger. I was like, Oh, this is what you got to do. You got to like, you know, flex on the gram. You got to do all that shit. And I don't know. I think it's kind of like, yeah it's ran its course everyone's starting to look exactly the same and I have this weird I don't want to call myself weird that's annoying when people call themselves I'm a weirdo I'm such

a weirdo I'm so quirky I'm so different than other people but I don't want to be like other people I don't want to be like anyone else I don't want to look like someone I don't that's the thing I have this thing inside of me this weird thing inside of me that wants to be unique and it wants and I want to be I want to do things differently than other people I don't want to follow the herd and so whatever like I'm chilling with like I don't want more than 10k followers I think I've said that I've joked before anyone over 10k is getting blocked I don't want a big following I

don't want, um, yeah, I just, I don't know, everyone's, like, famous now, everyone's a fucking, doing a fucking boomerang with their fucking mimosas and their fucking brunch and their fucking Tulum and their fucking party buses and their fucking, you know, clothing halls and their fucking, it's just, like, I don't want to be everybody, I'm a podcast So, so I talk on the microphone every day. I don't know. And here's the thing about that. I'm like, look again, live your life, do whatever makes you happy. I don't, it's not that I'm, um, I support it a hundred percent. Like it's, everyone's on their own grind, trying to make it, trying to do whatever, you know, like, yeah, it makes them happy. And so I'm fully supportive

of it. I just think for me, it's just not, I don't know. I finally, I feel like I'm talking this out because I am I had this realization where I'm like I don't know I'm uh I think I'm in the I'm like in a transformation period of like extreme growth and like perseverance out of I don't know 2020 and some bullshit from the past of like an identity crisis of like thinking I need to be an Instagram person or some shit or like a YouTuber I've literally struggled with this shit since seventh fucking grade I wanted to be a YouTube blogger in seventh grade and every single year since then until last year I've had the thought I've dabbled I've been like I should do this and I never commit I never follow

through and then so yeah for the first time I've committed to something and I followed through with podcasting to the point of like this is who I am now this is well it's not who I am this is all like I'm not attached to I'm you know what I mean I'm not like like I own this I'm a podcast host this is part of my life now but I'm still a little old 12 year old me riding ponies and shit like I'm just a little kid still at heart who dreams big and she likes to be creative and express herself and have fun and you know that's never changed and so I'm trying to get I feel like that's the whole point of like in your 20s you're you have a lot of growing to do in your 20s and a lot of um learning and unlearning to do and i think what i'm finding is that the

like i'm like an onion i'm like peeling back the layers that have calloused over from being influenced for so fucking long on social media and shit and by like tv and youtubers all the shit like i'm i'm peeling the onion and i'm getting back to who i like to my self like to who my raw self and that's um with without thinking I should do this or I should do that it's like a whole new chapter that's happening right now and it's really cool and yeah I don't know if I said this before I probably I keep repeating it but I just feel so much more at ease and relaxed about life and myself right now it's just so great it's I'm in a great place so anyways um fuck why did that get so deep we got we went places today

should I just end this um one more question let's do one more question um let me go down to the bottom of the list as a reminder this is my Q&A number 31 I do this every Saturday. Usually I ask Instagram for questions, but I'm doing a Reddit list right now, a Reddit question list for fun. I want to find a good one to end this with. What chip, if you could invent a chip flavor, what would it be there's so many weird chip flavors like ketchup flavored chips I think and like taco like if you go to the especially like if you ever walk through a Walmart look at the chips there's like like pizza flavored potato chips and shit now like I don't even

understand what's happening okay that's not going to be the last question though let's find a good one um what is a fact about the universe that keeps you up at night i feel like i already talked about that like the pixels thing the simulation shit the everything is so there's so many little tiny particles everywhere with like memory and like if you bitch at a plant and you talk nicely nicely to a different plant and then you put them in the same room the one you bitched at will die and or it will it won't grow as well as the one that you talk nicely to what's that sentient sentient beings sentient sentience sentience plants have feelings oh god no they don't well you know what aren't they still researching that or is that still in conversation

out there in cahoots like plants having feelings jimmy is eating he's like licking up the ice out of the starbucks cup it's so cute oh my little buddy okay one last question find one find one oh let's just do this right now let's do some throwbacks i got a great ending here some recommendations if you're burnt out of netflix and you're if you've seen every new show let's let's uh end the end this q a today with what hidden gems in terms of tv or movies do you recommend oh my god get a pencil out let's fucking go okay Okay. TV shows that raised me. Seinfeld. Watch it. Always Sunny. Watch it. Fucking

Sesame Street. No, Jimmy, come on. Let me think of other TV shows growing up. I don't know. Like anything from the Hallmark Channel. I Dream of Jeannie. Brady Bunch. um oh my god Gilligan's Island go watch Gilligan's Island oh fuck what other movies happy days uh I liked all those old old shows what other great shows were there why am I blinking this is like this was my moment I was like I'm gonna end this with some cool throwback tv shows to watch so yeah what did I say Seinfeld Always Sunny that's not even that old um uh shit shit okay let's do movies because i can think of great movies swiss family robinson towering towering inferno uh what's up doc the great escape

fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck oh like oh jesus christ jocelyn think of steve mcqueen movie um um okay i just said okay wait was that four i was i was oh well i grew up with the best movies in front of my face and i'm fucking flopping right now the godfather no um dude the classics obviously you guys already know like all of these you know what i mean let me just like reminisce right now classic movies um goodfellas fuck um schindler's list

what are our paul uh oh my god wait steve mcqueen i feel like there's a steve mcqueen movie i'm missing steve i like the greatest game that's one of my favorite movies ever Steve McQueen movies great escape okay yeah I said that oh is this the race car movie he was in the man in the Le Mans Le Mans is that what it's called the Le Mans Nevada Smith I don't know just go watch Steve McQueen movies Jacqueline just go watch Seinfeld in steve mcqueen movies i don't know and gone with the wind fuck it go watch gone with the wind dances with wolves the wizard of oz like the old one is there a new wizard of oz charlie willie wonka the chocolate factory

shit i love old movies so much i just don't i don't sit down and watch them anymore but i think about them and i get really happy i'm like oh man you sit around with the fam i used to pop a bunch popcorn and with our whirly pop machine and we'd uh just like sit and my dad put us onto the best movies growing up i think i watched poltergeist when i was like fucking two and then well actually he played that later like he he made us watch that so we it would um so we so we would stop watching so much tv because it was scary because like the the have you guys seen that poltergeist where they like get sucked into the tv or something it's like another world and it's all like

i don't know so holy shit happy saturday thank you for hanging out with me and i don't know i just i had a two second thought there like do i want to like end this and upload it for real or do i want to delete it and redo it because jesus i don't know what happened today and i'm a little bit yeah embarrassed a little bit but that's all part of the process you got to let your freak flag fly in this you got to let your freak flag fly bitch you got to let it fly because podcasting never sleeps you do this seven days a week and people are going to get all flavors of you and that's just part of the process and uh you're not going to always feel cool and sexy and like you know worth people's i don't

know like like worth like i don't sometimes i'm like i just wasted someone's fucking day away by my nonsense but you know what jack i need to stop with these doubtful thoughts and these that's it's the imposter thing i i definitely it's i'm in a phase of it right now i've been struggling i think i think ever since i hit the yeah 200 i've for the first time i've been like i've been like second guessing myself and it's a bunch of bullshit but anyways enough that hope you had a great week I hope your weekend's going well hit that subscribe button um I'm here every I'm here every day every day I'm here seven days a week and if you want to support the show and get access to my exclusive content head over to patreon.com slash tjms and check it out all right

that's it I love you lots and I will talk to you tomorrow okay bye