The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 278- Meeting My New Neighbor LIVE

Episode Date: June 11, 2021

Happy Wednesday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS 

Hey guys, happy Wednesday. It's episode 278. Welcome back to the show. okay you want to know something I do on purpose sometimes when I podcast um let me take my jacket off just a moment uh it's this it's this right now it's me saying let me take my jacket off it's me saying let me take a sip of water real quick um I try to make this feel like you're right here with me and it's super organic and I'm not scripted and I'm not just like saying the intro the same way every single time um I just went to my bedroom and my doorknob fell off just right like right before I started recording and I can't stop thinking about it like you know when you see something okay it's like I have an itch to go

fix it right now and then I and then I decided to record a podcast instead but I know it's broken and I just it's all all I would all I want to do right now is go over there and fix the doorknob but anyways um yeah sometimes I just talk out of like I don't even enter the podcast I just start talking to make this feel more natural and like you know less official I don't know I don't know because I feel like that's what podcasting is it's just a hangout session and look this is going to be you want to know what I'm doing right now I'm doing an elbow stretch jesus i'll stop i'll stop i gotta let you know right now this is gonna be drum roll please this episode's gonna be a cop-out episode a lazy episode i don't care episode a

let's waste everyone's time episode with a buzzfeed quiz okay i'm gonna go on buzzfeed i haven't looked up the quiz yet we're gonna find one together and i'm gonna do a quiz and have fun and hang out I mean I thought okay I mean they're gonna do a quiz today or catch up on the news um and read from like cnn.com but I just don't feel like putting my mind on the news right now and talking about it even though there's a lot going on like I honestly honestly I haven't talked about current events in about a month which is the longest I've gone refraining from you know checking in on the world and like adding to the conversation here on the podcast like I usually I'd say like a couple times a week I podcast seven days a week so a couple times a

week I end up reading the news and talking about stuff but anyways um oh couch update couch update I uh purchased a couch I ordered up a moving service to deliver it or whatever and long story short it didn't fit it's currently in a communal area where I live with a tarp around it all wrapped up in plastic ready to be resold and no one's bought no one's biting on my offer up post so or I have one lady coming tomorrow but um so actually yeah I guess it's basically yeah that means she's gonna buy it right sold I don't I don't know like it's never a guarantee like people I don't know why I always feel like people on the day of they'll be like oh sorry I'm not interested anymore blah blah blah so you kind of have to hound them like I

know tomorrow morning I'm gonna be like hey so what time are you coming today just confirming you're coming to pick up the couch blah blah but yeah go listen to I think it's um it was a Monday's episode this week about the couch story it's just like a lot there's there were there was a lot going on with that couch on god Monday was such a shit show of a day um anyways okay let's find a BuzzFeed quiz I want to cut to the chase because we got to answer questions here uh I do I do these I do these quizzes I call them like well I said this is like a cop-out thing where you just like do a buzzfeed quiz and you don't have to come up with talk pop topics on your own you just use the internet for and for I don't even know what I'm

saying. Tell me why I just got a brain freeze and I'm drinking room temperature water. How does that work? All right. You probably won't believe this, but we can guess your dream job based on the four course meal you prepare. That could be fun. I like doing food quizzes because it's fun to talk about food and listen to someone talk I feel like I don't know I enjoy I would enjoy that if I was a listener um my dream job is this I'm living my dream I'm my I'd say being a podcast host is the dream job it's the dream career it's my it's more so like this okay podcasting is a hundred percent the thing that I could wake up and do for the rest of my life and never get sick of it because it's literally my passion it's everything to me like that so

I don't really make money from it right now but this is like if I could pick a career path I'm doing it and with my other job like and with my regular job I feel like I'm I don't know I don't like the idea of just being a content creator I don't know why like I don't I feel like I need to work for a company I need to be contributing to society outside of the internet in a traditional way for me just to feel well-rounded and like like I'm really getting my money's worth out of college to be honest no like I'm working in PR I got my degree in PR you know what I mean it's like a good match it feels good like I feel and I wake up every day and I feel like I have a purpose that's not self-serving like oh I'm gonna like if my podcast was my main

source of income I would feel weird about I don't know well currently maybe this will change in the future but I would feel weird about like oh she gets she makes money from like talking about herself and literally sitting alone in her apartment and telling stories every day like what I don't know I just it doesn't doesn't sit right with me right now even though like there are so many people that have come before me all my idols out there all my internet idols all my podcast idols that have done this and that's how they make their that that's their primary source source of income it's their podcast and so anyways shout out to all you guys for believing in yourselves so much so that you became successful and inspired me to follow in your footsteps here

I am 278 days of podcasting in a row um it's obnoxious I know but look it's my passion and I'm catching up to y'all to all y'all long timers god I did so much math in the beginning of podcasting about how many episodes it would take me to catch up to Joe Rogan or like how many years it would take me to catch up to the like what's his face the um Ben Shapiro no he has like thousands multiple thousands of podcasts like the people over 1500 podcasts like how if I how many days in a row would I have to do that obviously 1500 days in a row but like I broke down to the years and it was like I don't know stupid I don't know the whole point of me doing this for every single day for a year is to climb the mountain and summit like actually accomplish a goal

for real and not be and not break the chain I think that's where I've I I'm I have to do this every day I have no I don't have an option to say oh like if I only had to podcast once a week I would feel so detached from this as a passion like I would feel like I need to do it more I need to do it. I don't know if that makes sense, but I would feel like I was, I'm not making any traction or getting anywhere just because like, I love the idea of doing something you love every single day. Every time you wake up and breathe and live your life, you, and the sun comes up, you're, you do your passion and then you go to sleep. And that day, every time you lay your head on the pillow you know you did your passion and you felt amazing because of it and that

that's literally the old like you have to do something every day because of that and so uh anyways buzzfeed quiz and I have an issue like here's the thing about me I'm not good at personal accountability which sucks to admit or I am now I am now like I'm I've totally embraced the quote like who you are when no one is watching is everything or whatever that is something like what you do alone or how you do one thing is how you do everything but like especially when it's just you on your own like that is so important that personal um yeah like responsibility and accountability just with you and you and only you no one's watching so that's something in the past I sucked it

and I feel like that's what makes people like I sucked it um holding myself accountable to my like goals and stuff I just get like I just like fuck off with something else and get lazy and I I wouldn't follow through um but I feel like that's what led me to major insecurity and depression. We're not major. I'm being dramatic, but like, I feel like it's the whole Ed Milet quote. The prom, like, um, to keep prom, you building confidence comes from keeping promises to yourself. That's an Ed Milet quote or, uh, Andy for Sella or the comp, a combination of the two. They always say that, like the, or I'm pretty sure it's Ed Milet, but the way to build confidence, the way to feel great about yourself is to keep the promises you make to yourself and I would

break promises all the time left and right every day and now I'm like disgustingly obsessed with my list of stuff to do every day like I get giddy in the morning when I look at my list because usually I write it the night before or whatever but I get like inspired by my own list of stuff I have to get done because I'm like I'm gonna feel more I'm gonna feel so confident by the time I go to sleep tonight because I'm gonna get all this stuff done it makes me feel like I'm killing it and I'm doing stuff in this life and I'm actually like moving the needle forward it could be as simple as like I don't know getting my car washed or like doing an errand but I don't know it's like dumb but I feel like we all do this it's kind of like an obvious like 101 how to be a successful

adult uh i don't know it's like a habit or routine we all do write a list get you done go to bed do it do it again the next day but with little stuff like goal setting stuff like damn i don't mess around anymore okay let's make a let's do a four course meal to figure out what my dream job is how long how long is this quiz oh it's kind of short I already told you this is my dream job so like what is it gonna tell me I want to be a chef or like I want to be a dancer or like BuzzFeed like I need to be I really want to be a fly on the wall a fly on yeah a fly on the wall in the brainstorm sessions at BuzzFeed for these quizzes like they they usually take like a couple things that don't

belong together and put them together and try they like make it make sense though can't like if you I don't know this is kind of stupid but okay whatever um first pick a drink to start the evening with um do they have a matcha tea I'm kidding um fuck matcha I haven't talked about matcha in a minute I still don't like it and I think it was trendy it was super trendy in 2019 and 2020 and I think it's I think it's done I'm not hearing I'm not seeing a lot of matcha on social media and I'm not hearing about it very much um I've seen I don't and I also I don't so which was so that whole trend the matcha trend so it was a bunch of people lying to the internet and themselves about how much they liked it. I've only seen one person come out and say they

actually hate it. I think it was Emma Chamberlain. It was probably someone like her on YouTube that said like, yeah, they got sucked into the matcha trend and they actually don't like it. And they, they're like, what they're, they were basically said what I've said about matcha. It tastes like shit. It tastes like horse hay. I would know what that tastes like because I used to give hay to my horse every single morning before I got on the school bus. Like I know the flavor and the texture and aroma of hay that's what matcha tastes like and does it like has okay anyways um but they would say like yeah it doesn't taste good and then they like coffee better and like coffee's 10 times better anyways so why did they ever drink something else instead anyways

they're always like it's a sustained energy instead of an energy spike I'm like I don't I just I can't get past that flavor anyways um so I gotta pick a drink I had a little satchel or sachet is that what it's called a sachet of matcha in my fridge uh I got my own apartment in San Diego it's been like two years ago yeah and I think I kept it and I like moved to this apartment and I kept it in my fridge still and I've never drank like I don't well it's gone now I've thrown it out but like the fact I the only reason I kept that matcha sachet or or bundle or whatever it is of tea I was because I was like oh I got a if someone came over and saw I had watch it in my fridge it would look good or some shit like that I don't even know

back to the quiz uh how are you doing what's up how's your week going how about that how about that fight how about that fight I can't stop thinking about Logan Paul god damn it like I've never been so inspired in my life and just amazed and just mesmerized and goddamn. Okay. Firstly, pick a drink to start the evening off with a margarita, a martini, a virgin pina colada. The last time I had a virgin pina colada was in Vegas when I was 18 at the Mandalay Bay wave pool. Yeah. Literally that's the last time I had one a gin and tonic a mojito or a berry mocktail dude pick a drink I'm going I'm going margarita I decided this year that I like spicy margaritas like every other girl on TikTok every

other there's like a trend with girls approaching 30 like the people that started off on TikTok saying I'm too old for this app I don't fit in here I don't really understand this app I don't really understand TikTok they would make videos they would make content around the fact they were an older millennial confused by tiktok um but now it's like there's a space for them and i feel like there's a drink trend they like there's a drink they all drink spicy marks and they all talk about getting spicy marks and now as an older i'm not an older i'm a regular millennial i feel like i'm not approaching i'm not on the cusp i'm right on the line of being a millennial right in the middle I'm right down the middle. Uh, but now I'm the same way. I'm like, I like a spicy Marg. I like

a, I like a spicy margarita. So I'm going to go with Marg. Um, next question. Choose a starter, a stalter, barbecue wings, mozzarella sticks, nachos, veggies, and dip, oysters, onion rings, and that's it um oh my god I just had oysters Rockefeller is that what it is no it wasn't Rockefeller I just had oysters um with my family over Memorial Day weekend as a starter if that's an option I like getting oysters depends how they're prepared kind of like I'm I'll eat them raw but like Rockefeller is probably my favorite first for like a appetizer onion rings that I just to start with no thanks veggies and dip go fuck yourself nachos um yeah that's a great starter actually that's a meal no that's not a starter for me wings

I'm not a wings person no you know what I've I've realized about wings and Jacqueline is I never had a wings wednesday college phase or whatever that's called like i never had a buffalo wild wings wednesday college phase like there was a buffalo wild wings in my college community that people go to every wednesday for wild what was called wing wednesday i never got into it and then i would never i just never really went to bars and ate wings and i yeah i just i'm not when I really think about it, I think, I know it's a thing. I know, I know barbecue wings, I know wings are a thing, but I just really haven't had my day with them yet. I mean, it's yet to come. Maybe that, maybe that that's in my future. Maybe wings are in my future, but

I see that on this like quiz here as an appetizer. And I'm like, I'm a, I'm okay. I'm going mozzarella sticks. I'm going mozzarella sticks. Yeah. Uh, oysters are mozzarella sticks. I got to go with my heart. I'm going mozzarella sticks. That's what I really want. Yeah. Can't, you can't fuck up fried cheese. You really can't. You can fuck up an oyster. Like an oyster can be hit or miss. That's why I'm not answering oyster. Okay. Next question. Um, what is the main dish? Let me take a drink of water. lasagna burgers spaghetti fajitas ramen or salmon salmon salmon salmon salmon salmon um do I have to make this does this have to be cohesive so I got a spicy marg

I got a spicy margarita so I drank that then I had mozzarella sticks did you hear that ka-ching someone's eyeing my sofa and they just sent me a message let's get back to them hey I've been eyeing this sofa for a while but was also concerned about the size of the door how many inches wide is your door should I do this right now let's get back to the quiz after I can um walk and talk I also have neighbors outside my I can tell they're in the hallway right now so we're gonna walk and talk and measure my door frame for this person who's trying to buy my couch um shit that was such an issue the door frame if it was just literally

go listen to monday's episode that um what's it called where's my tape measure the door was short or whatever the by one inch like if my door was one inch wider it would the couch would have fit so yeah we'll get back to the quiz um should i just open my door have my headset on and just fucking hey guys talking about mozzarella sticks and chicken wings and I'm selling a couch and I'm measuring my door hello hi okay we don't really mind either way it does swing open and it like bangs really hard but yeah you're welcome are you you're Susan I'm Jacqueline. Sorry. I'm on a call right now. Um, but, uh, yeah, I've, uh, I've never had any issues with like keeping it. Yeah. Yeah. I'm Jacqueline. Yeah. Nice to meet you. Welcome.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Okay. 31 inches. Got a new neighbor. That's cool. I heard someone moving in the other day and um I never saw them I just like heard the movement so 31 inches where's my phone dude the intro of this podcast was I I do what did I say I'm like I don't really I I just like say random stuff to make this feel like a hangout session and like you're right here with me I feel like that whole interaction right there was so organic and like uh my door is 30 inches oh my god should I make it should I say it's smaller than that so they get the door is 30 inches wide did I lie wait what did I say 31 that lady was talking to me though I wasn't really paying attention. I didn't really measure it well. Should I go back?

I have to, I can't, I can't be a bad salesperson. I can't just lie or make something up here. Let me just measure the backside of my door. I don't know why I literally opened my door to open the doorframe. Um, you know, when you have a conversation, hold on, we got one, I hooked one side oh fuck my door's 32 guys I'm gonna sit I'm gonna stick with my 30 inches because here's the thing I need to get this couch this couch needs to go away okay it's gonna get stolen if it rains I'm fucked this person probably lives in a modern home but like I'm in an older building with a tiny ass door so if I say my door's 30 inches I'm terrible guys I'm going to hell because if it didn't fit through my 30 inch door and they have a 31 inch door or 32 inch door which

I'm guessing they probably do then it'll work for them anyways say a prayer that this damn couch gets gone by the end of the week because anyways oh what was I saying oh I like had an interaction with susan my new neighbor i just met her and she literally was watching me tape measure my door frame with my pop star it literally looks like i'm working in a call center like i was holding my so i had my laptop set set on this like side table thing by my door but she saw me with his headset on talking like a call center employee with a tape measure and then she was asking about this door we have like a gate she's like do you guys mind if it's open I'm like I don't really care but I was so scatterbrained I feel like I should have been

more like hi I'm Jacqueline welcome you know like I'm the new neighbor I don't know how did I do I think you guys could hear it I don't give a shit I'm honestly I've I've taken um mid-podcast breaks to grab my postmates outside I've like walked outside naked I've podcast like not naked but I've like walked outside with my headset on with my literally holding my laptop because all that's all I have for equipment um because I plug in my headset to my laptop and I'm mobile so I can like walk around I can go outside on the street and talk to people and do shit it's great anyways We got to pick a main dish. So I had mozzarella sticks, a spicy margarita. Dude, where's the burrito? First of all, fajitas, you can make it a burrito.

Susan, Susan, Susan, Susan, Susan, Susan, Susan. I can't forget her name. Susan. She looks like a Susan. I won't forget. Her son's, wait, is that her son? is that a kia soul no what's that kind of kia what's with i have all these like middle-aged women single single middle-aged women with hot sons not like they're not like okay they're just like good-looking young early 20s dudes um wait is he even i can't tell you know what show me a good hairline or it's like okay from a distance if you're a guy with a good hairline I think you're hot automatically, but it's like once you get close, that's when you start seeing detail and it changes things. But from a distance, I'm looking at him getting in his car right now

and he's got a good side profile. You know, I can admire beauty when I see it, right? That's okay. What did this person get? I'm like, okay, I want to, I'm like, I'm going to turn this fajita into a burrito. By the way, my neighbor's son looks attractive. And now I'm getting a message. Oh, hell yeah. There's doors 35 inches. Oh my God. Uh, okay. Minus 35 inches. So I think it would fit, right? Blah, blah, blah. But the couch itself is only 33 high. So I thought it might work. That will work. That will, I'm going to say that will totally work. And then I'm going hit her with the dimensions the dimensions dude i'm such a good saleswoman i love sales sorry uh shit where's my post uh thank god i promoted it so someone more people would see it

god damn it i'm gonna say the dimensions are you gotta like keep them informed and give them all the details possible. Copy. 96 wide. God damn it. God damn it. Messages. The dimensions. Paste. Fuck. I pasted the entire post. God, I have to delete. This is the intermission. This is the seventh inning stretch. Everyone get up right now. Touch your toes. Bend over. Touch your toes. Stretch it out. This has been kind of a long episode, kind of. I don't know. i'm uh trying to copy and paste the dimensions of my couch i'm trying to sell uh it's more important than the show right now dimensions are 96 wide 44 deep 33 h h h high god that's that's the issue i had with the door so obviously my

door is too narrow but the depth of this couch because it's like a cloud couch it's so it's like 44 inches deep so when you twist it and angle it to try to get it through a door it's it's tough it's tricky um for my main dish is this the last question no there's one more question that I'm going to actually rant about and I'm going to pop off after I answer the main dish question and I do the next one, you guys are going to hear me get really upset. But what do I want for the main dish? I mean, I'm not in a, I've had my, I feel like I've been ramen out since I moved to San Diego. I feel like I've been there, done that. Spaghetti, just like getting an, like a spaghetti dish like literally angel hair pasta or spaghetti noodles or angel hair and a bolognese doesn't

really do much for me like I'll share it with someone but I'm not gonna just order that as my main dish unless I'm at the spaghetti factory that's the only place I'll do it um lasagna too like I never order lasagna I'm gonna go burgers you know what shout out to the barbecue my family had on Memorial Day weekend we made homemade burger burgers hamburgers hamburgers and I got to I got to hand make them I was the one doing the what's it called the smashing of the burgers the hand forming they were good as fuck there's nothing like a homemade burger on the grill like just you know so I'm going it's summertime I'm going burger and then final question BuzzFeed, why do you include this?

Why did you include this? Final question before this quiz reveals what my dream career is or what my ideal career path is. Final question is, care for some soup? where's my um clip I clipped out when I used to be on I used to be on YouTube and I clipped a video segment of me ranting about soup where is it did I put up my trash I think I did um I'm not a fan of soup I'm not a fan of soup I'm I don't get it I want to eat my food I don't want to drink it I don't like thin bisques like fuck a lemongrass soup fuck a fall harvest

butternut squash soup that's literally just a thin orange batter that's been heated like can't do it don't wanna I I like chili so chili's in I like clam chowder from Ivers Ivers from in Seattle specifically beef stew that's it I need to choose something I don't like soup other than those those options uh beef stew chili or clam chowder or my grandma's millionaire soup what does she call it million dollar soup but actually it's not that good I just used to eat it a lot as a kid but when I really think about it the noodles were so overcooked and like you have to put them in really late when you make soup so they don't get mushy and she probably put them in the beginning love you grandma but

I mean I gotta pick a soup though this quiz until it won't give me an answer until I pick a soup oh my god all of these all of these options are triggering like these are the types of soups I can't even like first one pea and mint pea and mint squash and eggplant mushroom and pumpkin squash and fennel tomato and mushroom finally tomato and coriander first of all buzzfeed there's too many options here like they're so it's like every these are basically the same

soup in a different font. They're all the same. They all have the same energy. They all have the same texture. They have the same vibe, the same aesthetic. Like everything about these soups is the same. There's just different names for them. So yeah, too many options. I don't want to pick a single one of them, but I'm going to have to. After I tell you that I forgot to include chili. Chili. Wait, did I include chili? Beef stew, chili. I think I did. i did what was i thinking of was there another one i'm missing that i like for like another soup that i enjoy like soupy thing uh okay anyways uh let's pick one definitely not the pea and mint

oh i don't want to do this i'm gonna have to go tomato and mushroom and i'm dipping a thick grilled cheese inside of it that's the only reason I'm picking that soup I don't want soup it literally says care for some soup I'm saying no and they don't have a no option finally it's time for dessert finally I thought that was the last question okay Jesus um crepes ice cream brownie waffles cake brownies again or cupcakes six. Bitch, it's summer. I'm not eating dessert. Um, I'll take a bite of one of these. If literally this is how it is with me. If I'm out to dinner and there's a dessert option, someone's someone order it. Okay. Like, okay. We want dessert. Great. Cool. Add an extra spoon. Please bring

an extra spoon for Jacqueline. I don't care. Literally. I don't care what one it is like out of this list I don't care my I'm gonna take a bite of it and that's it that's all I do with dessert when I like when I'm at dinner and then in the home oh god oh god okay oh god in the home oh my god oh my god oh my god but that's what I'm at dinner okay with like sharing the meal with people at home. It's like, hey, she's having a breakdown. She's in Vons. She goes by that dessert cart. What's that thing in Vons, the refrigerated section of desserts? She's having a meltdown. She grabs a piece of carrot cake. She goes home and that is dinner. And I'm eating the entire slice. So like, that's the difference of me out at dinner versus me in the home. Or like eating an ice

cream a pint of ice cream like of course I'm sitting down eating that entire thing with myself period but if to answer this question to get this to the get to the stupid fucking result of what my dream job is I'm gonna go I'm going crepes no that's like a breakfasty thing waffles yeah i'm just gonna go if we're at dinner let's just do like this sunday with ice cream sure great fuck yeah i'm a crime scene investigator you're very detail oriented and you've always wanted to make a difference so it makes sense that you'd want to become a crime scene investigator you dream of solving crimes and getting justice shout out buzzfeed thank you for telling or thank you for revealing to me what my dream job is based

on a four-course meal I prepared on your website it's funny I was just talking to someone about this speaking of being a crime scene investigator uh when I was younger I kind of do this now not to the extent I did when I was younger but um like if there is a explosion no excuse me if there's like a car crash or a shakedown with a bunch of cops and ambulances and fire trucks and shit or like one time a house in my neighborhood burned down like my like my mom I feel like my mom did that my dad didn't really do this would like we would like park in the close by parking lot or we'd park somewhere with a nice viewing or like a van a good vantage point to the scene and watch it for entertainment

like I remember there was something happening at a gas station and in my hometown and then like dramatic like some guy was getting arrested tons of police like something crazy happened something like it was like or no or no like a car I think it was a car crash I think those were the most exciting car crashes yeah when you see like the entire front end of a car smashed and you just know someone died or they really got hurt like those are the best things to watch or the most entertaining to watch or like heart-wrenching and sad tell me you're a psychopath without telling me you're a psychopath no like

because you have adrenaline you're like holy shit this car is like crunched it's on fire people were just inside there's 10 ambulances there's all these cops there's all these people standing around so you know I don't know if this is normal but you get curious you're like holy shit this is interesting I don't see this every day it's like watching a movie in real life and I just remember a specific time where there this gas something crazy was happening at this gas station and we literally pulled I think there was a yeah one of our favorite like burger burger hamburger joints or whatever was like across the street and I feel like we just put our we like parked in a spot so we could watch it did we get food like how fucked up would that be if we went

in the burger place and got food and like went back out to lunch uh but yeah i'm just saying this because i got the crime scene investigator uh result on this quiz yeah there's other stuff like yeah that neighbor's house burning down we like went down and honestly we were basically consoling them and like with the owners the whole time it wasn't like we were entertained by it was like a super old Victorian house, beautiful. The attic caught on fire. The whole top of it burned down or burned off. But we, but like we showed up, my family's like, Hey, we want to see the action. We want to see what's going on. Trying to think of other times. God, the worst, I think the craziest story I have. I don't know if I can tell it. It's been so long. It's been

years I've never told the story one day before school I think it was before school not after there was this man with like just cargo shorts on or something just like shorts he was like six five long hair like Jesus naked except for those shorts but completely covered in intense scratches where that were all bloody like he had just been tangled up in blackberry bushes with thorns like he looked like jesus like the man was walking down the street i think we were driving to school in our like on our street like on our where our house was we're pulling out the driveway and we see this man and all I remember is being I was so freaked out he just had a wallet apparently

yeah um but he was all bloody cut head to toe he had like a beard long hair it was really intense and like traumatic like it was scary to see someone that bloody and fucked up um and it was just scratches it was just a bunch of like lines all over his body like tons of bloody scratches and so all I know is that I think it was my mom driving oh my god did my mom do this or my dad I don't want to mess this part up my mom oh my god my mom did this because she's literally mother Teresa she wants to like help everyone in need like she's an angel she doesn't give a fuck like she's not she has no fear she we literally picked this guy up and he laid down in the back of our truck and we took him to a nearby neighborhood he like he said hey can you do you mind driving me

down this then we took him into like a cul-de-sac where he like knew people apparently I don't know the story but it seemed like he was a drunk driver who crashed his car and ran away from the police and he crashed his car into some like crazy blackberry bushes that cut him up really bad but it was totally like a runaway situation like he was trying to get away from the police or something like that i don't think my mom asked any questions i feel like we just helped him because he was so bloody and cut up but yeah we like drove 30 seconds down the street to this cul-de-sac and dropped him off that was probably one of the weirdest like stories I don't know like it wasn't like a crime scene it was kind of like a

criminal like maybe potential criminal thing I don't even know what that was I should I should ask her about it because I was so young I was probably in like at that time at that house I was in fourth grade third or fourth grade I was right in cursive yeah I was probably in fourth grade anyways okay I'm gonna end that I'm gonna end the episode uh this was fun um kind of all over the place I got a message back from this oh fuck yeah they're very interested I love when people say okay great I'm very interested yes when you uh they want to let's just finish this episode with me replying back okay perfect I'm very interested when you picked it up did you use a pickup truck or a moving van it was a moving van I it was a long just it was a lot it was a

moving van just like an Amazon driver. Who gives a fuck about details? I do. It was a moving van just like an Amazon driver. A truck would also work great. God, they better fucking pick it up and I'm not sweet like oh someone wants to pick it up tomorrow I'll hold it for you for tomorrow like no if someone wants it tonight they're getting it I don't play like because again sometimes the day of people pull out I've had that happen so many times when I've sold stuff it's like no longer interested and then you're like great back to zero or hopefully you have a waiting list and someone else is in line or like someone else also hits you up I'm so frustrated you know I was on the phone with my mom god I didn't do an episode

and I'm just like done with my furniture I've had it for so long it's like the only reason I have my couch is because I had a small apartment and this stupid ass couch I'm still looking at was the only thing that fit anyways she was like why don't you just get rid of everything and sit on the floor crisscross applesauce from now on and just like chill and start from scratch and like slowly buy new stuff and I'm like yeah I think I'm there because this dream couch this cloud couch thing didn't fit through my door I've already been I've already made peace with the fact that it it's not happening even though it's literally outside right now and I want I could just like easily you know I can't it won't fit but like I just want to like put it in here so bad

and I can't um so I've already made a piece of that and now I'm like I just got I can't be I can't look at my old couch any longer I've been talking to you guys about this since November I'm just like I need to I need to I need to probably order something custom or I don't know like I want it to be at least 96 inches long like or I want like an extend I want like an oversized couch in length but depth has to be able to fit through my tiny ass door anyways thank you for listening this episode of the Jacqueline Monroe show happy Wednesday hope you're having a great week so far I gotta end it right here now hit that subscribe button I'm here seven days a week um I hope you love yourself okay I hope you love yourself I hope you're happy and fulfilled

and whatever you're doing in this life um that's that's it figure it out if you're not happy you can change it you're in control of everything and including your happiness um you know small city big dreams I did it 2020 depression 2021 happiness I don't know I did it shout out believing in yourself just go re-watch Logan Paul uh there should be a montage of him making statements of self-belief like or like self like I'm you know yeah anyways um just you only live once be happy somehow like just fucking like yourself and get go after it keep your keep the promises to yourself and you'll feel good feel better amen okay talk to you tomorrow all right bye