The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 28- Welcome To My Speakeasy

Episode Date: October 1, 2020

Happy Oct. 1st! TJMS is officially on YouTube now! In this episode I talk about Jeep Trucks, 10 year old flip flops, and talk about my life. Have a great day!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic 

Episode 28. Welcome back to the podcast. what's up guys welcome back to the podcast happy October 1st it's Thursday and I'm doing this in one take right now usually I start the beginning over and over and over again until I like it but I'm on camera and I'm recording and I have a hair appointment in an hour and I no wait an hour and a half wait two hours excuse me I'll be okay I'll be okay but I'm feeling like the pressure's on and I need to like do a good job today but um if you're watching on YouTube today I'm inviting you into my home for the first time this is my headquarters this is my studio this is where I'm filming every day and now you can watch it on

YouTube so you know what like this is like a fucking speakeasy like nobody even knows that like it's here I already wrote that I wrote that on a note I thought that would be funny to say I thought it was like a speakeasy and now that was a stupid way of introing this and I want to restart but I'm not going to so um holy shit okay so today I'm gonna go over I suck okay today hi I need to talk to the camera hi today I'm gonna go over my 24 hours what I did yesterday yesterday holy shit I don't know if I like this YouTube thing I'm feeling this is like not sorry guys I'm having an internal conversation I'm having a conversation with myself about this I don't know if I'm like down for this it feels weird to know that this is gonna be posted right

now okay so anyways I'm gonna go over my 24 hours I'm gonna give you a coffee fact that's I'm totally slacking off on my coffee facts I'm actually gonna tell you a fact off the top of my head instead of googling it so that's cool I'm gonna have some deep thoughts probably about some shit um talk about some uh TikTok content I've been looking at actually some really crazy shit I saw on TikTok where like this guy he um I'll go into it um what else I don't know so it's Thursday it's October 1st Jesus it's I can't believe it's almost it's like almost Christmas I can't wait to go home can't wait to see my family um yeah it's like this year's gone so fast so I need to like gather myself right now Jacqueline like I need to go coach just call

the time out and I need to focus so Jacqueline okay coffee fact 24-hour update bitch about society talk about TikTok ask people to subscribe to Patreon okay okay so now we're gonna do the coffee fact um so I was like in a rush to do this this morning I'm like I need to I need to get this done before my hair appointment because as you know if you're watching on YouTube my hair is half brown half blonde so anyways I came I came up with this coffee fact off the top of my head and it's more like a milk fact it's a milk fact is that gross it's a milk fact okay I'll stop so I follow this uh lady on uh Instagram who he shows like recipes and stuff like how to make stuff with like three ingredients it's insane she's like three ingredient bread it

took me two minutes to make and it's like what the fuck so anyways this lady um posted a is that I don't feel like good saying I don't feel good calling her a lady this goddess of a woman her name is Lil Sipper Lil Sipper on Instagram shout out to you I love her username Lil Sipper she's awesome anyway she makes this nut milk for her coffee and stuff so like or whatever like she makes her own homemade almond milk this is your coffee fact this is your because I always start with a coffee fact everyone for the new listeners this is like a routine thing i do every fucking podcast and on that note i'm going to drink it before i tell you what it is drinking my coffee first podcast my left eye is constantly drifting out the window and i'm not addressing the camera

because i have to keep um my eye out for people to people watch and talk about so it's gonna be awkward watching the youtube podcast because i'm just staring off to the left okay this is what you fucking do you could take your almond milk excuse me take your almond butter all right you get your blender out you get some nice distilled clean water don't do that tap water shit and you put like I don't know four tablespoons of almond butter in the water in the blender you blend it boom almond milk you don't need to buy it this lady's like I have oh my god I call her a lady again she's like I haven't bought almond milk in 10 years because she makes it herself so anyways I got iTunes jumping at me the little icon at the bottom how annoying is that I hate

when my um fucking like the icons at the bottom of my screen are like jumping up and down like trying to alert me about something anyways okay so let's talk about the 24 hours um what's today Thursday I'm annoyed I started this YouTube thing on fucking Thursday but hey it's October 1st um okay so let's talk about yesterday it was a kind of a blasé day but like so is every other day of the week so basically I um I chilled I podcasted I chilled podcast chill work uh worked out and then I came home and I ate dinner on live I actually made my dinner for you guys on my live stream last night which is a good time um I had so much energy after my workout of course so I was like I'll just tire myself out and talk to you guys so then I did that and then I stayed up too

late again um not I went to bed at fucking 12 30 because I got this dm this hilarious dm this guy sent me he listened to my podcast and I'm gonna play it for you guys because I think it's really fucking funny so um I was up to like 12 30 on my phone and then I woke up at fuck I woke up at six so this whole like Jacqueline's trying to fix her sleep thing is it's just it's not going well right now um so yeah did i even talk about yesterday did i do anything else yesterday okay i have notes here i'm referring to my notebook for the people on the youtube you can see my my notebook i'm cheating i'm always writing notes to keep me on task for the podcast um oh my gosh there was a swarm of earthquakes a swarm like 80 fucking earthquakes over east of san diego in the salton

sea i got a cop on the freeway stalled his car's just sitting there with his lights on no cars around them like he's not pulling anyone over i know my mom's gonna be like jacqueline you can't people watch you can't talk about what's going on outside because eventually people will be able to tell like where you live like if someone drove by and saw man but neighbor they'd be like oh the way the direction she's looking at her window means that she lives in this building and then anyways um yeah anyways the fucking earthquakes yesterday there was like 80 like small earthquakes the biggest one was like a five a mac five but i get the um san diego twitter update san diego san diego earthquake twitter updates on my phone and it my phone was

like blowing up every fucking two minutes because there were so many earthquakes so yeah that happened yesterday uh oh i wrote it like i literally wrote this down i wrote dirty cushions want all new furniture so yeah I've been staring at my couch cushions I have a white couch and like this is how I know that I found my passion like when I'm neglecting my home and I'm when I'm not taking like immaculate care of like all of my shit like what like I'm looking at my leather ottoman I haven't waxed that bitch or whatever I fucking put a leather cleaner on it to like make it shiny. I haven't done that in like over a month now. Cause I've been podcasting now for 28 days in a row. I haven't cleaned off my, my couch cushions. I got blueberries all over my

couch, white cushions, and I'm still staring at that stain. Um, yeah, like I'm disinterested in like cleaning. Cause I feel like in the past when I had nothing to do, no hobbies, bored, I just clean all day. My, my apartment is always super clean. Cause that's, that's how I pass the time. I listened to a podcast and I clean pretty much seven days a week prior to finding my passion and podcasting so it's funny that I wrote dirty cushions on this note right here dude oh I was supposed to talk about the set design in the beginning and I forgot how stupid was that speakeasy thing I said I was like this is my headquarters this is my studio that I'm inviting into my home this is like a fucking speakeasy no one knows where it's at

I do wake up a lot in the middle of the night and think of things and I think that's something I wrote last night I actually wrote there's another thing I wrote which is more of a deep thought I'm gonna get into later but anyways oh um let's talk about what happened on my live stream I had a guy shitting the whole time watching it which was funny he kept telling he's like I'm taking a shit so that was funny and I I told him hey if you're constipated give up like he was he was there for so long I mean he kept updating me on like the fact he's still shitting and I'm like look if 10 minutes have passed so I pretty much only had guys watching my live stream last night and yes I know live streams are annoying I don't care I had a great time and the thing is I get so

much energy after my workout talking to you guys makes me it like tires me out I'm like a little kid at night who needs to like go to bed at your bedtime but I'm too wound up so I don't know like I could call a friend but you know that's not really um in the cards right now so I talk to you guys anyways this guy's like taking a shit right and I was like look if 10 minutes go by and you still haven't shit and you're straining and you're constipated accept defeat and walk away and give up because I was asking the guys last night I'm like why do you guys sit down for 45 fucking minutes to take a shit and they're like well sometimes it takes a while to get out I'm like no you go take a shit when you need to take a shit like when you feel it coming and if

you can't after 10 minutes if you're sitting there and nothing has happened walk away give up so anyways I I talked to him about that last night I tried to help him out but um anyways then he kept commenting I was like eating baby carrots last night and I was eating dinner I had some broccoli he's like oh yeah good five you're gonna shit great tomorrow I'm like why are we talking about shitting that was a very awkward I mean you know what I'm like I'm over that hump honest to God like I feel like I've crossed that bridge with you guys anyways it was interesting and then one guy was like yeah i'm gonna leave a review on how your podcast helped me shit because i watch you eat broccoli or whatever and i'm inspired to eat broccoli what am i saying okay

what else happened on the live stream someone asked like to talk about my story moving from washington to san diego like elaborate on that tell my whole story which i'm not really feeling like that today i'm feeling more like i just want to like i don't know i just want to talk about fucking jeep trucks that's what i okay so that's part of my 24-hour update i have been seeing so many jeep trucks and i don't know if you know what that is or if you've seen it before but it's when a jeep has a has a bed in the back like a truck bed how would i describe how this makes me feel well definitely frustrated annoyed definitely annoyed it's like be a jeep or be a truck but the cab is the size of a fucking jeep and then it's got this little bitch bed in the back that's like

four feet long and i'm just so annoyed by it i'm like okay you know what i was thinking so this so the reason i'm saying this is because i've seen probably 10 in the last 24 hours like i don't know what's happening there's one i was like on my way to the coffee shop this morning part of my 24-hour update let me drink my coffee it's funny how I said that there's like a normal jeep that just drove by um what was I saying oh the jeep trucks I've seen so many and so it's really annoying but I thought I had a thought I was like what if these jeep trucks were just like a suburban instead of having like the back a truck bed like the whole like thing is a cat like a giant long cab like a suburban anyways um so yeah those are annoying they just piss me off I don't

like cars that look stupid like that um I'm one to talk I don't I don't drive a very attractive car um it's like the shape of a fucking whale that's what my friends would call it in college the whale ah uh I don't buy new shit I even have a I even have a thought about that I wrote on the on the way to the coffee shop this morning I was looking down at my flip-flops and I'm like I never buy new shit I've had these since I worked at Tommy Hilfiger like 10 years ago and like all my shit is so old when I look around I'm like I'm glad I went through that fashion phase oh my god am I screaming at you sorry I'm glad I went through that fashion phase where like I I think from like 18 to like 22 that's when I was going out all the time that's

when I started going to Vegas and like clubbing and like not like I do that all the time but like I had my first run at doing that and I collect like I got a lot of nice clothes and shoes and bags and all that shit and I feel like I have everything I need you know what I mean like I I have all the like it does for whatever occasion I need to go to I have I have the clothes that wasn't a good sentence I have clothes for any occasion I need to go to pretty much okay I'll stop correcting myself all I did yesterday in the podcast all I did was correct my sentence structure and it's because I wasn't I don't know I was off yesterday I was like excited I was nervous to talk about the debate go back and listen yesterday's episode and listen how much

of a fucking Trump supporter I sounded like fuck my life um it like all came out like I was trying to be objective the whole time talking about the debate and then it just sounded like yeah I I tried to like my goal in that fucking podcast was to leave you guys going I don't know like who if she like who she's gonna vote for like what you know and um I failed so anyways um today I'm gonna not correct myself every two seconds yeah jeep trucks okay that's kind of like a stupid thing I talked about oh and buying new stuff yeah like I'm holding my ring right now I've got all these rings on I purposely applied my rings today hot neighbor walking by don't recognize you he's got a v-neck long sleeve green shirt out it's currently 90 degrees but I'm one to talk because

I never tell you guys this but I sit in the same it's like my good luck crew neck my same tie-dye crew neck every fucking podcast and I sit here and sweat the whole time and it's funny before I pressed record I like went and put a shit ton of deodorant on because I just knew I just knew um anyways yeah 90 degrees outside he's wearing a green v-neck and I don't know that's gonna the pit stains are gonna be out of fucking control um I forgot what I was gonna talk about oh my rings I applied my rings today because I was like oh you're gonna be on camera and it's like hot when girls have a lot of rings on I didn't paint my nails though so I'm trying to like hide them for the camera I don't want you guys to think I look I am poor because I have poor nails poor nails

that's what my sister calls them when she doesn't have her acrylic she says her nails are poor nails hi Julia how's how's your law how's being a lawyer going I haven't talked to my sister by the way. I'm so excited for her and like proud and everything. And sorry, I was like looking at, um, but no, I was trying to say that I don't, I haven't talked to her in like two months. Cause I think she's really in the zone with her job and really working hard. And I need to, I need to talk to her about like, what's it like to be a lawyer? Like what the hell? My sister's a lawyer. I think that is the most bad-ass shit ever. And she has like her own office and her own, her own, like everything, she's getting a new, like, a new house, a new dog soon, she's really, like, I can't, I'm

just excited for her, I know how that feels, though, like, I've kind of always had my own apartments and lived by myself, so, like, I'm excited for her, because she's, she's been in school for, like, the last two years, and what a shit show, graduating this spring on fucking Zoom, I think that's how she did it, I need water, shout out Voss water, got this at my gym, I'm not going to gargle anymore. I gargled in the podcast or on the podcast a couple of days ago. And I figured that now that I'm on camera seven days a fucking week, I don't want you guys to like screenshot me like, or like clip that of me. Like, I don't know. I'm just nervous to tilt my chin back. Um, Oh, by the way. So I had this thought about my microphone choice is I look

like a little fucking pop star if you're watching the video podcast and I don't think I've ever told you guys this like why like I ultimately decided decided on my um call center headset if you're a new listener I went to Amazon and I got a call center headset for my mic that's it looks like I'm a Britney Spears you know what I mean it's got that little tiny microphone in the front and I can look like Hitler if I put it above my lip I'm showing the video it just looks like a Hitler stash. Is that bad to say? Whatever. That's what it looks like. I'm just saying what it looks like. But anyways, I never told you guys like, like a part of the reason why I chose the headset look. So there's microphones, you know, although the ones people use like the Shure MC765 fucking

thing, that's like $400, which I'm willing to invest in that because you don't really have to buy audio equipment. Like you don't have to keep updating it. Like once you have that good, nice microphone that like everyone fucking has like Joe Rogan and all those people Joe Rogan and everyone else I'll just say that you don't really have to upgrade it you know what I mean so I could have gotten that um but fucking I oh shit I have to like pause the fucking to re-record damn it I'm gonna talk about the microphone in two seconds guys I'm rusty at this just like give me a break okay I'll be right back my camera doesn't record past 20 minutes okay bye Jesus Christ okay so fucking the microphone thing is um the reason why I didn't get the like the one everyone has

the the big black big black microphone if you know what I'm talking about it's like it's the one everyone fucking has you've watched a podcast you know what it looks like here I'll hold my water bottle for reference like this is like the see okay people are on the video are watching it's it's kind of triggering for me there's something about that shape and then and circumference and volume what the whole the whole setup and just like the position it is in front of you as you're podcasting it's just like triggering for me and I don't I don't know I just once you see that that big giant fucking dick looking microphone you can't unsee it and so I've been a little bit shy about talking about the that's pretty much like why I did the pop star

look I just can't unsee it if you guys now I'm gonna fuck you guys up because I just told you what it looks like to me and now every time you watch a podcast you're gonna be like oh especially the ones with a little puffy like round head on it dude it's just it's a giant it's a giant dick that's what it looks like so anyways um I'm trying to look more like dainty and feminine and honestly the whole I love the the pop star look because I don't know it's like a throwback I it's like n-sync Britney Spears I guess pop stars still use them like Ariana Grande probably uses something like this but anyways okay moving on TMI but that's why I decided on this fucking pop star mic dude too much oh dude I want more coffee though wait

okay part of the message I got last night the video he this guy sent me an audio message he's like you're crazy and I'm like because he's like I'm listening to your podcast right now you're fucking crazy like shit I know this is my self-mastery journey this is my self-acceptance course I'm embracing everything about myself and I know that I just I'm out there sometimes you know what but I've been this is this is like the heavy hitting kind of like deep thought I'll leave you guys with right now I have I've been alone pretty much all year quarantined which is a bunch of bullshit it's like done and dead and gone now like I I feel like I'm basically choosing to be

isolated now at this point because I could totally socialize and be with people but anyways this year I've had a lot of alone time, downtime, thinking time. And what's happened is that I got depressed and I wasn't, I wasn't happy. I was really like stuck. I was like, what am I going to do next? I lost my job. I don't really have a lot going for me right now. I have no friends. I'm in a new apartment. I'm in San Diego. I'm like, this sucks. You know what I mean? But what came out on the other side of that was a lot of fucking therapy and family intervention telling me that I need to get my shit together. But, um, I basically had this release or whatever, where I was like, I'm going to give up that fucking dream I've had

since I was like 18 to be this hot influencer person. You know what I mean? I, my, my goal wasn't to be a podcaster ever. That happened so randomly. Like this wasn't the goal. My subconscious was always like, Jacqueline, like you want to wear cute outfits and take hot pictures on Instagram you want to go on a bikini photo shoot and work with like photographers you want to have you want to be on PR lists for makeup companies and you want them to send you free shit you want to do your YouTube vlog shit and show your daily life and put on your makeup on your videos and like do that kind of stuff right that was my dream for so long I was always holding down a nine-to-five working a regular job I was always doing that but like I always thought in

the back of my head like oh I'll like slowly but surely do that influencer stuff because I wanted to be this like goddess version of myself and holy shit I'm looking at the camera I have two my my hair is fucking two colors but I decided to release that so my big thing this year was like I went through that depression those low times of like just what who the fuck am I what do I want to do with the rest of my life and I keep saying this I don't know if this is like not okay to say but I was like in other podcasts I've said this year I came out as myself because I feel like all of the that the version I wanted to be of myself like that idealized image of this sexy Instagram chick who like is just like doing so many Fashion Nova photo shoots and shit I didn't actually want

to do that but like with Fashion Nova but I don't know I just wanted to look I wanted to take nice pictures like I've never had a photo shoot I've never had a brand semi-closed like but anyways I gave that up I released that to fucking entertaining people this year has been fucked and I realized like what is the problem here the problem is connection communication contact people that's what we're all we're suffering a little bit this year in that way and I'm like well how can I provide a solution to that and I just decided on this I decided you know what show up every fucking day on your podcast and talk to people connect with them bring the people like I'm basically inviting you into my home into my fucking speakeasy

and I'm uniting the people like I'm trying to entertain you I'm trying to provide you some something some connection this year because I don't know so you know and I wrote this fucking like one after I went to bed I wrote a note on my phone and I wrote um you know, I decided that stories are meaningful. Thoughts and ideas are meaningful. Conversations are meaningful. The stuff I was chasing before that I wanted, I'm doing so many hand motions on this YouTube video. I need to like sit on my hands. This is why I need a seatbelt for my chair. I decided that, yeah, the stories are meaningful. My life story is meaningful. It has meaning. Conversations with other people are meaningful. And, you know, talking about my

thoughts and ideas that's meaningful that's that's that's what's really important in that human connection but the the stuff I was chasing all of the the influencer stuff and like stuff itself things the the the dream of being on a bunch of PR lists and having brands to work with and like doing that whole thing is that was like this external quest I was on to like decorate myself and look good online and at the end of the day it it trips me up so much because I'm like Jacqueline that is it's like you're not fully expressed when you're doing those things a lot of the time I see and you know what I could still hold down a fucking podcast and do this and be an influencer all right so I'm not I'm not I'm not shooing away any brands okay like hey I'm I'm

cool with like let's connect let's chat my emails and my Instagram so okay um I'm not like fully shutting it down I'm just saying that because of course I could do it all of course um I don't know I'm just like realizing that that path wasn't it was like going against the grain and I I'm proud of myself I've always questioned did I've always kind of made fun of it like hi guys today I'm going to show you this new product you know like I've totally done that thing like I I just I saw the other I saw the light I was like look that isn't I can't take that shit seriously and it's weird how for so long influencers have convinced me that I should be an influencer like that and do that thing like they kept reinforcing in my brain like Jacqueline this is like the this is

like the dream life this is like the dream shit you know what I mean like you should dude they go to hotels for free and travel the world for free because they're an influencer like how cool that be how cool that life be but I don't know I think this is a better fit for me like I said this year's fucked, you guys need some entertainment, you need some connection, here I am, this is my fucking solution, amen, dude, more coffee, oh my god, it's so good, I had to, so I didn't update you guys on this morning what I did, but um, I fucking ran out of my instant coffee yesterday, of course, I run out of it so quick, so I stocked up on Amazon, I bought like four packs of my instant coffee, but this morning I

had to go to the coffee shop and um yeah that's the update for this morning but I got my coffee and it's so good because it's like from my favorite little shop my back is sweaty okay um let's talk about oh I gotta plug this shit patreon.com slash tjms if you want to support the show everyone gets a shout out why am I doing the blood sign on okay no that's blur that out I don't have an editor but I don't know why I just threw up a gang sign I was doing that a lot last night on my live stream don't throw up gang signs that's not okay um caffeine is this is not okay so patreon.com slash tjms if you want to support the show everyone gets a shout out uh youtube obviously if you're watching

youtube hi just go ahead and subscribe below if you're watching this um but otherwise if you're listening go over to my youtube channel and subscribe to see the video version of this podcast and also what wait what else do I have to do oh okay okay okay all right guys apparently it's a big deal in the first eight weeks you podcast to get a bunch of reviews so you can get on the new and noteworthy list and if you know anything about Jacqueline I have not explored or researched or done anything to like understand how to make it to the fucking top you know what I mean like I don't I'm just doing this every day and who the fuck knows what's gonna happen but someone reached out to me who's done it for six years and he's like look

you have a small window of time to get on that new and noteworthy list and then that's gonna be like great for your podcast or whatever however it works but um so anyways like go and leave a review right now if you're listening like go over to your phone like go on a little take a little vacation over to the side of your I feel like your phone's on the counter or something like I don't know I listen to podcasts on my phone just like set down somewhere in my room but go over there just tap some stars however many you're feeling right now for this this episode like two stars one star also leave like a like write a review and please just like give it to me like tell me how much you're annoyed by like who the fuck did this chick think she is doing a podcast

seven days a week like write that one star boom i'll love you forever so yeah reviews are great so patreon youtube reviews boom it's almost like i just ran an ad like you know how when you're listening to a podcast and like halfway through they start talking about like magic spoon cereal or fucking casper mattresses what's my favorite one wait oh uh blue chew to help guys get their dicks hard or whatever bluechew.com or bluechew my bookie and that's the part where I always fast forward so I'm sure you guys just fast forward through all that bullshit patreon youtube leave review boom done um okay so I'm gonna just go to this tiktok because I'm gonna read so I wrote like what this guy said he's like he's okay how do I explain what he does he goes to his mirror

in his bathroom and he like walks in and records himself and he says a phrase and these phrases are so like mind-fucking and so confusing that like you're gonna just shit your pants when I read these to you so let me like try to play the music let me get like scary music on um this is like how he he uh does the background music um i'll do like eerie music instrumental on youtube is this copyright fuck watch me do my first youtube podcast and shit gets fucking taken down two hours of scary instrumental halloween music it's gonna be like lightly in the background oh fucking a we got a revlon goddamn dyson wait dyson has a new hair straightener I don't give a fuck now we have a Gatorade commercial

is this copyright I don't know I don't know how anything works okay do you guys hear that music okay get in the mood ready okay guys October 1st

here's my question for you I have one, two, three, four, I have five questions to ask. How many moms used you as a bad example for their kids? Next question. Nobody knows you better than your backspace key. Next question. Do dogs like to lick us because they know we have bones under our skin?

Final question. Smelling something is just breathing normally. You're just thinking about it more. i'll just let you marinate on those on those uh little things i just said to you in your little ear right there how are you doing do you need to take a take a take a water break you know what i'll do that let's take a water break i'm leaving on the music can you guys even hear that i don't know if that worked thing is like i don't know how to mix my audio or do any of that i'm just like i'm just playing it on youtube and i hope it's loud enough whatever i'm not professional

about my shit i like to keep everything like raw and uncut and like not very high quality because that's like my brand because i'm oh this guy that dm me i'm gonna play it oh that's what i'll do next he's like you're contrarian and i just i never like thought about that word i haven't thought about that word for a super long time because i think i used to like call my dad a contrarian or like I associated associated that I never know associated associated that word with my dad and um apparently it's like someone that goes against the grain I rock to the beat of my drums a little way so anyways he said I'm a contrarian and why did I just say that oh because I have low quality shit for my podcast I don't want to have that nice

giant dick-sized microphone and I don't want to have high quality music I'm still playing this in the background let me turn it off dude copyright fuck watch my youtube podcast like not upload till 9 p.m tonight because my goddamn internet's so slow okay so i'm gonna read the dm now or like audio play it or whatever and i'm gonna shout him out because he has his own podcast so i'm like he probably i don't know i don't know if he'll be offended that i like played it him talking but whatever get over it i'm gonna plug you okay okay let me go to my instagram and find it here. He reached out to me. I followed him and his friend because they have a new podcast together and they talk, it's like color daddy for boys. You know what I mean? And he replied,

damn it. Dude, should I restrict him, open it and then read it and then reply later or leave him on the scene right now while I record this? Why is this like, why is this even a thing? Why do I give a fuck? Okay. Oh my. Okay. For those on the video podcast, this is a paragraph. Do you see my phone? I know. Don't make fun of my iPhone seven plus. Don't make fun of it. That is a paragraph. So now I've, now I feel the pressure. Okay. Let's work this out together. So this is how the, uh, the message went. This is, I'm going to shout him out. His podcast is called, uh, Nappy and J. N-A-P-P-I. Nappy or Nappy? Shit. Nappy and J. And this is their description of their podcast. Candid, intense, and usually absurd. Speaking the words, excuse me, speaking

the world's untold truth. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Yeah. So this guy, you know how I found him? This guy on TikTok, thick, thick, Chris Nappy, thick daddy on TikTok or something. He's like thick daddy talks he's like your big brother he tells you relationship advice and like stuff about guys and girls anyways i found him on tiktok and then i saw that he has podcasts then i followed his podcast this guy who's his co-host reached out to me and this is what he fucking he left for the people on the youtube you can see all these voice messages this is what he wrote or this is what he said please don't be mad at me that i'm playing this jay his name's jay so i was listening to your podcast for the first time and i just like to start by saying that you

are fucking crazy the fact that you're a solo podcaster and you're releasing an episode every single day and these episodes are like an hour and a half long is just crazy and mind-blowing i don't know how you are able to just talk that whole time and just go i just know how hard it is to just do a one podcast a week so I can't even imagine doing seven so good for you on that however I will like to say that as a person who was born and raised in California I found it highly disrespectful that you're saying that burritos are better than tacos so that's the message there's three more he goes into this monologue for about 17 minutes I swear to god he sent me a podcast he goes into this fucking monologue describing why tacos are

superior to burritos and look I'm not from California all right I had a few taco trucks in my in my uh in my up where I grew up in Washington which are amazing and authentic as fuck like I love a nice little carne carne asada taco with a shit ton of lime on it okay so what they're called carne asada did I fuck that up carne asada um but I like burritos and the response I gave him, I basically said, give me a break. You know what I mean? Um, sorry, mom, but I wrote, give me a break. I love eating dick. Of course I prefer burritos. I thought that'd be a witty comeback. You know what I mean? Or what do you response? And like, it's like, it's a similar mouthfeel. No, I'm kidding. But like, that was my, that was my joke back. You know what I mean?

Like anyways, so then he replied this fucking paragraph. okay let's talk about burritos his argument he detailed out in his monologue was about the fact that burritos are like mushy and it's all like mushed together and it's like gross that way and I'm like it's fucking amazing I'm the type of person when I eat my food like I like my shit to touch I like to mix shit around I like bowls like I don't like things on plates where everything's separated like put all your veggies and meats and everything like in a bowl and mix that shit together and sauce the fuck out of it I like everything mixed up so that's kind of what the burrito does for me the taco it's like yeah tacos are great all right

they're fine I prefer burritos he called me a contrarian I think this is why I brought this up he called me a contrarian because I'm doing burrito Tuesday he's like I get it you're a contrarian like he just had he he not only left me a 17 minute fucking voicemail podcast in my dms he did an audio message he just wrote me it's like a four paragraph essay people on the youtube can see it can you see that don't make fun of my iphone 7 plus oh my gosh mom you're not gonna like this message i i'm just gonna read it i haven't read this yet i just know the first sentence is gonna make my mom go oh like jacqueline that's 2 pg 13 for your podcast whatever let me take a drink before i get into this

i've never okay wait oh man i don't know if i should do this whatever i'm winging it i got a hair appointment soon i gotta finish this podcast i'm gonna finish i'm gonna read this dm the response he said to that so he said this it seems like you have a lack of experience when it comes to sucking dick i've sucked a lot of dick in my life and i've never thought it reminded me of eating a burrito for one only about one out of every 100 dicks you come across in the world in the wild has a chance of being the size of burrito one out of every 100 this guy has never sucked it and that might even be generous and that might even be generous second i don't know how you eat a burrito but i don't generally put my whole mouth around it when i eat it if right now you

were thinking to yourself that you don't put your whole mouth around a dick when you suck it suck it then fyi you're doing it wrong i love how serious he fucking like he really thought about this lastly a dick has a completely different feel than a burrito in your mouth in my extensive experience a dick feels more like a laffy taffy wrapped around a church candle what the fuck that's a perfect description a laffy okay in my extensive experience a dick feels more like a laffy taffy wrapped around a church candle but hey maybe that's just me that's his last sentence I gotta give it to him like he really he really again detailed his thoughts out there I appreciate I love when

someone writes me a paragraph and I love leaving them on fucking scene through my phone on the table I'm over it sorry mom uh like I've been so nervous in the past episodes I'm like I don't want to talk about sexual stuff because I have like my whole family listening but that was funny I'll give it to him maybe he'll get a follow but he's fucking he's got a private uh profile and three posts so there's probably not much going on there but yeah so I was up until he like sent me that late at night and then I like read it or I listened to it and then I responded of course i prefer burritos i like eating dick it's like the same thing it's like you know what i mean it's like i'm doing the motion on the video podcast if you want to see the circumference yeah

that's true i mean the the california burritos that we eat down here are huge so he does have a point like that might you might come across that in the wild one out of every 100 times but i don't know some burritos are less wide okay i need to stop i'm gonna change topics i'm feeling nervous about talking about that um what else could I talk about I really want to wrap this wrap this penis up in a burrito wrapper dude why am I talking about dicks so much on this podcast literally I mentioned shitting now I'm talking about dicks um it's not that kind of podcast please go listen to call her daddy that's what I'm nervous about too like p.s. I know I shouldn't care that much because it's like we all experience like sexual stuff in our life we all do it we all

talk about it we'll think about it but I just don't want to steal Alex's thunder like I don't I don't want my brand to be the sex podcast you know what I mean so dude I drink coffee I drink fucking coffee and I talk about fucking uh working out and I all I do literally all I do is workout chill no podcast chill workout chill sleep drink coffee podcast repeat no wait there's coffee before the workout so so the morning it goes this is how my day goes every fucking day literally not even no bullshit like this is sad well most people think I have a sad life but I'm living my dream this is literally my dream I literally wake up it's like coffee podcast chill coffee workout eat dinner chill sleep repeat that's it that's all I want to do I wrote that on a

fucking note in my phone like what i what i want to do every day and that's what i wrote dude follow your dreams live your dreams that's what this i keep coming across these fucking tiktoks that are like does anyone ever just take a moment to think about their life and how we've all accepted this this uh capitalistic structure where we go to school and then we work and then we retire and then we do it like does anyone just stop and think about life and go we don't have to do that and accept that we can do whatever we want it's your life you can do whatever you want Like that's, I don't know. I'm kind of embracing that now. Like, I don't know. I'm like, I just, I just like to do what I like to do and I don't want to do anything else. Sorry. Like I'm willing to work. I'm willing to do every, you know, I'm willing to like hustle and like grind and have like a normal job, but they've always done that. I've always held that down. but lately I'm like you gotta go all fucking in man on your passion Gary V would tell me to double

down right he would tell me to double down on my strengths and I think dude I'm a daily podcaster for those that are new listening to this literally literally the way this happened the thing is I do a podcast every day and I assume that like you might listen to like one or two a year like I don't think people so I find myself repeating myself a lot because I'm trying to catch people up and give you guys like fill you in you know but I do think that it's crazy how like I told you earlier how this year was crazy I like lost my job got really depressed I was complete shit show of a mess I look like shit I felt like shit and then I turn my life around basically now I'm a daily podcaster but the way this happened I really want to shout

out Kane I think his name was Kane this guy was DMing me one night and I was I was watching I think it was like the final Rogan episode with him and him and Duncan uh Duncan Trussell and they were the podcast was like five hours right and I remember I like I like took a photo of that a photograph I took a fucking photograph of the uh of my tv because I'm like my fucking OCD is gonna make me sit through this whole five hours because I knew like I was I think I started at like 9 p.m and I just knew like I'm fucked I'm gonna sit here and watch the whole thing because I'm OCD like that I'm like I just want to get through this because I know it's gonna be an amazing podcast right so no bullshit I post that on my story and then I think something earlier I

posted made uh Kane or Kanye I don't know his name I'm gonna call you Kane Kanye he replied and he's like oh like I'd love to talk to you more about this that sounds like like we'd have an interesting conversation or like I want to hear your thoughts you should do a podcast or something like that and no bullshit after 10 minutes I was sitting there watching that Rogan episode on my TV and I'm like I had this flashback like I'm back in college I'm in my car I've got my boss jock app pulled up on my phone which is a podcasting app or like an audio app and I have my iPhone headphones in and I'm sitting in my car parked outside my apartment podcasting because I did a few of these back in the day I had this flashback I'm like

Jacqueline I'm like do that just sit there and do it I immediately I like grabbed my I had the app on my phone still I like grabbed my um fucking headphones plugged them in and I did a whole entire it's on SoundCloud it's not actually my first episode which I'm annoyed by I'm really annoyed by the fact it's not on my iTunes or Spotify right now but the first episode I did I just went through every month of 2020 I talked about my year I was like here's a life update so I felt like you know what Jacqueline you've been doing vlogs you I did like seven vlogs this year which I was proud of like during my depression I was like holding my shit together on YouTube every day like trying to make a weekly vlog Jesus Christ just go back and watch me try

hard on those videos if you want to have some fun um hi guys welcome back to my channel anyways I went through every month and I thought well hey I was doing that and I haven't done a vlog in like a few months so I thought oh a podcast is a good easy way to update of course easy one take post that shit I did it I haven't looked back since I got I got that bug I was like wait this felt so good to talk talk it out talk about my year talk about what's going on and I keep promoting like every podcast if you're new something I always promote is like I think I've unlocked this new you know how people talk about meditation and morning pages and all these like mental health practices. I've personally found it so therapeutic to listen to the sound of my own voice. No,

um, to talk it out every day and talk about my insecurities, talk about my struggles. Past episodes are more heavy in that way. If you want to like go back, but, um, talk, just talk about like, it's literally morning. Verbal morning pages is my format here. And I found it's such a therapeutic thing to do every day. And I think that's why I got hooked. I was like that felt so good to talk it out and so yeah that's like why I'm here hi there's my life story I'm dude it's crazy though and then I got obsessed because I'm like wait it's so fun I love chit chatting I love I have literally I write every day as it is like I'm always in my phone writing notes I have like a 260 page document here I'll pull it up on my fucking computer from the last

I like at the end of last year I compiled like everything I've ever written since like 2012 and a huge document and I'm like well I could just talk about the things I write anyways and y'all like it apparently a lot of you do so hi thanks for supporting my podcast so yeah that's kind of what happened so there's my life story how cool is that that's just like really making me proud of myself because I don't really take a lot of time to like reflect it's well excuse me in the past I that's not true because I'm doing it lately but I find that in the past I would get caught up in seeking seeking seeking never stopping and appreciating what I'm doing and I think that's what I'm doing every day now every day I'm like

oh my gosh I'm like literally living my dream I'm podcasting every day I'm obsessed with it I love this I'm so happy and fulfilled like the thing is is I feel so fulfilled in what I'm doing so i'm just i never have a bad day every day podcast is a good day that's why i do it seven days a week because i want to have seven good days a week in a row everyone get a call center headset go record yourself talking every day this is going to be the new wave i'm a trendsetter seriously though like hearing your soul like literally your voice and like talking it out i think is better or more therapeutic than um just writing and then getting carpal tunnel i hate like i love writing in my journal like i show i'm showing the camera right now go to youtube to

see the video um I just like it you know like pen to paper but it's in your head still like you unless you're talking and this is why like okay Jacqueline just go see a therapist or have friends and talk to them because you probably want to have issues of course but hey if you're like me and you're lonely and you live alone and you're single and you're like I just I need to work my shit out talk talk and I talked to myself in the shower all the time I do uh before I podcasted I would literally do like pep talks in the shower regularly so is this a psychotic breakdown who knows I don't know my mom doesn't like it when I critique myself and say stuff like that but I've been gaslighted in the past to think I'm and I've been told that I have psychopathic tendencies

which I'm trying to unlearn because I think I don't know I'm trying to think I'm trying to have a higher self-esteem and I can't keep shitting on myself and thinking I'm I've got these mental fucking weird issues like calling me a psychopath or like dude you were an asshole of a man and I don't want to tell that story yet I'm gonna tell it someday but I'm not gonna tell it now um maybe some of you know who I'm talking about I think I'm gonna wrap this podcast up um I got a hair appointment this has been a great one I feel really like happy that I I finally pushed myself put it on YouTube um sorry that there wasn't a lot of people watching today man but neighbor's slacking he's not doing his workout and this is usually the time yeah this

is usually the time he's doing it and oh yesterday I'll just update you on this I got really close to him I went outside um like I was out putting my garbage away and he he had his workout going on my side of the curb and I got really close and I was like oh shit now I can see his face like because I haven't looked I haven't so I have this hot neighbor I call him man bun neighbor and I have no I haven't really seen him up close I always see him from a distance but yesterday he was on my side of the curb and I'm liking what I'm seeing so um anyways I think I'll wrap that up I'll wrap this up here have a great Thursday happy Halloween happy Halloween first happy fucking halloween first it's gonna be a great month dude sober october's going on i'm seeing

a lot of posts about weekly or fucking monthly challenges so drink your water get your good sleep work your shit out um i don't know subscribe to my youtube if you're listening or watching patreon.com slash tjms if you want to support the show and uh i'll be here tomorrow i'm here all day i'm here all week i'm here all year see ya bye All right, today's Patreon.com slash TJMS patron shout-outs are launching into the Harry Potter universe. I got two today. First shout-out is going to go to Ricky Jensen.

Ricky, if you were a Harry Potter spell, you would be sluggaless erecto. Sluggalus Serecto and then my next patron shout out goes to Trevor Garrett Trevor Garrett if you were a Harry Potter spell he would be Locomotor

Wibbly Locomotor Wibbly alright y'all thanks for your support go ahead and google search those those spells thought that might be fun I don't know that's what I envisioned you guys as spells if you're new listening i always do my patron shout outs is something they like a creative

um thing they remind me of or whatever like i've done kitchen utensils in the past i've done crayon colors now i'm doing harry potter spells so anyways thanks for your support and uh talk to you tomorrow all right bye