The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 285- Take A Shot Every Time I Say Backpack

Episode Date: June 18, 2021

Patreon.com/TJMS 

What's up, guys? Happy Wednesday. It's episode 285. Welcome back to the show. okay i just got off the phone with my mom and she recommended i make this she recommended after what I told her that I make this a two minute, a two minute episode tonight. We'll get into that. I'll explain a couple of things, but hi, it's Jacqueline.

Welcome back to the show. Hit that subscribe button. I'm here seven days a week. I'm probably going to make this. This is probably going to be longer than two minutes, but basically, how do I say this? I'm booked and busy in 2021. And especially right now. And I was telling her how much work I have

to do tonight. And she's like, well, what about your podcast? And I'm like, yeah, I still have to do that too. She's like, well, why don't you just make a two minute episode, check in, check out, tell everyone that Jimmy lifted his leg to pee for the first time today, which is what I told her and what I updated her about my dog. She said, she's like, Jacqueline, say this. Hi, welcome back to the show today my dog lifted his leg my puppy lifted his leg to pee for the first time and that's it have a great day goodbye like anyways um i think i can add more to that basically okay i have some i have a couple things to share so yeah jimmy my golden retriever has been squatting like a girl

for six months and now he lifts his leg like a boy and guys did I even say this I'm laying on my new couch let me set the scene I'm laying on my new couch um I think in the next episode I'll explain the finale of the couch series I've created over the last week or so um I'll explain the new couch everything about it how it got in my apartment how it all fit how I got rid of my old one but anyways life update I'm laying on my new couch I finally have a new couch it's done she's here and she's not the color you'd expect not the color that I initially wanted so that's fun um anyways so yeah my dog's peeing with his leg up my mom's like just tell him that that's like interesting that's what happened today but something else that just popped into my head

when I started started recording was what I something I did this morning I have these backpacks from my old apartment that were still that have been sitting in the back of my car in a black garbage bag for over a year now since I moved to this apartment okay now there's a there's a reason for that actually uh so these are nice black backpacks they're uh great for like they're great for working in a coffee shop like I walk to the coffee shop usually with these backpacks on with my laptop in them they can hold a lot of stuff they're really modern looking like something I don't know like a parkour they look like a a parachute dude back like you know when you see people uh parachute what's it called

skydive yeah it's kind of like a skydiving backpack vibe like super sleek and sporty anyways so these backpacks have been sitting in my car in a black garbage bag because like a week before I moved out of my old apartment, I had a, I had a mouse running around that died on top of one of the backpacks. So basically I, when I packed that apartment up, I just threw them in the garbage bag. I was like, oh, I need to go like get these really clean and I need to deep clean them. Well, I kind of forgot about, long story short, I've had this garbage bag in the back of my car not really I like forgot what was in there you know what I mean and then just uh this morning I took it out I took them out and I fucking

dude this is the story I want this is what I remembered in the beginning of recording today I okay I went on a run this morning with Jimmy I'm starting to run with him now and I came home sweaty as shit jumped in the shower with the backpacks okay now I figured you know what my shower gets boiling hot I'm gonna rinse myself off a little bit first warm up myself and then I'm gonna move the shower head around so that I can clean the backpacks and hang dry them in my shower because I'm like how the fuck like how do you clean a backpack first of all like do you throw it in the washer like I don't know so I figured okay the bacteria from the dead mouse it was only on

one spot it was on the outside of the backpack so I figured okay it's been in the car for a year these don't smell bad at all and there's no way that's still like that bacteria or whatever is still alive and like gross you know what I mean I don't know how I don't know how it works there was no like moldy weird stuff they looked fine it looked like two brand new backpacks like take a shot hey I think I'm gonna title this episode take a shot every time I say backpack yeah that'll be the title of the episode um they look like new back so yeah I'm in the shower after my run with the backpacks cleaning them with some detergent and they hung up nicely and they're drying right now and that's

that's all she wrote that's really the story I wanted to tell so what did I say today I got to keep this short and sweet because yes I have a lot of work guys I haven't talked here's the thing the, in the latest episodes, here's, here's what I used to do. I used to tell you about the details of my life, like every little detail, everything going on in the background, everything, right? I mean, some, some stuff I want to talk about, but for the most part, I was constantly updating about my life. And in the recent episodes, I've, I haven't been mentioning what's going on because there's a lot going on there's a lot more going on in my life than there used to be and I feel like I don't know how to go about talk talking what the fuck

wait what a stupid spelling of a word talking it's like salmon salmon woman. I don't know how to go about talking, talking about it to you guys. So anyways, that's why this is like, this is a short and sweet episode because like after this, after I record this, uh, she's got work to do. She's got stuff to do. Okay. She's got things happening. So booked and busy bitch 2021. That's what I wanted. I really just, this is what I should be doing. I'm proud of myself for getting to this point. Um, but it's a lot to do a seven days a week podcast and do my other stuff and stay sane. So I'm glad I have a new couch though to lay on. Here's what happens. Like never, I don't want to get into, I was going to explain

my fucking desk, desk to couch routine when I work from home because it's a, it's a thing. uh, how I go back and forth all day. And now I have a couch I really like laying on. This is 26. I'm turning 26 again this year. FYI, everyone is turning the same age as they did in 2020. We all were robbed. We were all robbed of a year of our life. We're all turning the same age. I refuse to turn 27 this year. Um, so yeah. Ooh. Ooh. Like hit me like, that just hit me like a bus. 27. Whatever. I mean, here's what I like about getting older though. It gets better. Everything gets better. It really does. Like people bitch about getting older. I'm like, no, it gets better you start giving less of a shit about everything and you like yourself a lot more

and you're more like I don't know you're just like a I don't know I'm maybe I'm just speaking for myself but I had so many little rackets in my brain for so long in my early 20s that were stupid and unnecessary and those don't exist anymore and I just I enjoy my life so much more now and I'm more fulfilled and just like happy about little things and I'm not worried about stuff that doesn't matter I don't know it's probably not smart that I lay on my couch when I record because my neck is I have a neck impingement in this position it's like pillow behind my head laptop on my crotch like I'm laying horizontal this is a five minute episode is that it do I have anything else to say what am I gonna eat for dinner

I got a bagged salad from Costco the cranberry kale thing everyone has had that everyone with the poppy seed dressing I usually mix that with some I'll probably have that with some shrimp ew that might not be a good combo yeah I don't know I'll figure it out and definitely a passion fruit LaCroix my new favorite LaCroix also from Costco okay that's it I hope you had a great day I gotta leave shout out mom for inspiring me to do a short episode because I need to and because it'd be good for me to not sit here for an hour and a half um gotta be selfish sometimes gotta protect my energy I got a great review let me read it let me end the episode the review that I read yesterday I

haven't looked at my iTunes reviews or Apple reviews or whatever it's called in a while and I got a new one how do I find it wait and this made me feel good because I feel like I feel like the last few months of podcasting has just been a train wreck honestly um oh it went to 4.7 shit I bumped up see all reviews did I get another one another written review oh someone else left a review then um here we go it's titled caught off guard okay five stars give people the benefit of the doubt now i'll just be honest when i first read this i was like what are sentences so i'm just gonna

read it word for word you'll get the point when it's done give people the benefit of the doubt when I first listened to the Jacqueline Monroe Show podcast, I had my doubts and reservations. However, I find myself captivated by her unique style of radio hosting. Catch me listening to any number of her past episodes. She does it seven days a week. While I wait for the current episodes to drop. Take a walk through the life of Jacqueline Monroe.

an easygoing vocally articulate and sharp sense of comedic nuance that will carry the listener to the end of each episode my advice listen to the latest episode and then sort through the past episodes and i'm sure you will find an episode in the 250 plus hours of podcasts of the the jacqueline monroe show has delivered to us for an interesting intellectual look into the hosts views thoughts and views thoughts and day all in the life of jm goddamn shout out ob dave ob dave wrote that review and back in may and i just saw it yesterday so i don't know it's been better it's been better but i'll never shut up i'll never shut up about this ever we're on a phone call okay I don't need to get on the show I don't need to get on the microphone

every day and win an award for like being a great entertainer and educator and like providing value to my audience like fuck that no I'm picking up the phone I'm saying hey this is what happened This is what's going on. I'm laying on a couch. My dog peed with his leg up for the first time today. And I washed some backpacks in my shower that were formerly infested with rats. And that's it. And goodbye. Okay. That's what I've built. The show is that. It's not that serious. It's not that deep. It doesn't need to be, but I'm still, I'm never satisfied. That's the thing. i'm never i feel like no matter what i do i'm just never like impressed by i don't know like when i read a review like that i'm like wow other people see that that's cool but

i don't i'm like i don't okay sure why are people like that like why do you this is a 10-minute episode now fuck what's my battery percentage fuck um why do people get that imposter thing or that because I've let go of the perfectionist tendencies I used to have where I was that paralyzed me like I wouldn't ever I would never post anything or do anything unless it was perfect you know what I mean so the like the fact that I'm throwing a podcast up seven days a week and not editing it is insane to think like my younger self would be like would have a heart attack so it's not like I'm a perfectionist it's just that I don't have a high what's the word I don't think I'm the shit or like I'm not um what's the word like I'm not full of myself

like I don't like being like yeah I'm I'm that bitch or like whatever girl's saying I'm that bitch or I'm queen or like oh like like I'm so cool I'm like I don't I'm just like I don't I don't know I'm confident I'm very confident I like myself I'm a I'm a big I am my biggest cheerleader I am excuse me my neck is in pinch I am my biggest cheerleader um I am all for what I'm doing here on the show so I'm not whatever but I just don't need to go and like flex on all you hoes and be like yeah yeah I'm so interesting and cool and you need to listen to everything I say and like follow my life because I'm so fascinating and I'm better than you like stick my tongue out like what that's why when I like I said when I read reviews like that I'm

like wow that's very kind thank you again ob dave and it made me feel good about myself but i just don't ride through my life thinking my own shit doesn't smell you know what i mean like i what's the word is that like narcissism no i don't know what's that vibe because i feel like some people have that vibe and some people just I don't. Is it humble? Is that the word? Am I humble? I'm afraid. This is the thing. I think I'm scared. I actually have a fear. One of my biggest fears about being a content person on the internet is looking thirsty, looking insecure, and looking like thirsty, desperate, insecure, and full of myself if that makes sense like because I think it now at this point with

social media and the internet people can sniff that out it's really easy to detect and I think if you're not able to be natural and raw and real and authentic then you don't have you probably don't have longevity on the internet it's not going to resonate with people like being yourself and just being unfiltered and just like I don't know I don't put on a show I'm putting on a show right now but I'm not putting on a show if that makes sense we're literally guys we are literally in a long-term relationship right now I feel like if I called up someone like if I just like I just talked to my mom on the phone this is exactly how I talked to my mom I'm not putting on a performance for my podcast it's that I'm having a little reflection right now I'm going past time I know

my mom said to do this for two minutes but I'm just thinking about that I'm not a fake bitch if you think I am tell me what the red flag is and like what's giving you that signal because I'd like to know I'm curious about my own behavior and my own I think it's good to have um, constructive, uh, whatever. Who's going to, no one would, no one would even tell me that if they thought that, you know what I mean? I like feedback though. I like hearing like, Hey, pick a topic and stick with it each episode. How about that? Jacqueline or Hey, cut out the word shit. I actually was told that I said that a lot. And then now I try to say it less or my mom keep bringing my mom up she said cut back on the swearing and I

feel like I've improved that a lot since the beginning episode so I'm not um opposed to getting feedback so if I'm coming across like a fake bitch I actually would love to know what is it? Guys, I'm at this point, I'm, I'm stalling and procrastinating because I, after I finish recording this, I have to do something challenging that I don't want to do. Uh, I'd rather sit on this podcast to be honest. And, uh, I'm, I'm procrastinating. I'm stalling. I'm like, what else could I have tweezers I'm staring at staring at a piece of tweezers on my night my um coffee table right here um that I just pulled out a hair with dude I don't get hair like

why do why do we have hair all over our bodies I mean over I know we're mammals but like it's so frustrating sometimes I'm like god damn it's summer and I gotta be hairless I'm getting laser hair removal I've had it think I think this is the year I get I get started on that I can't I can't take it any longer and I'm not one of those girls that can rock the little peach fuzz thing that look if I was naturally blonde maybe but I'm unfortunately I'm a not I'm a fake blonde um actually unfortunately fortunately I'm naturally dark very my hair is very dark so I have to shave sometimes twice a day no I'm kidding it's just like a lot of upkeep in the summer and I'm always in shorts and skirts and I'm just like god I need

laser hair removal I need to do what the all the Kardashians did they're hairless they're like naked mole rats apparently they all talk about on their show um oh yeah speaking of the Kardashians I guess there was some reunion. There's a reunion tomorrow for their show. I don't know. I saw some buzz about that on the internet here. I'm still stalling. What else can I talk about? Oh yeah. People weren't very pleased with their outfits. Um, yeah, I don't really follow any of them or pay attention to that anymore, but okay. There's other drama going on. Like Chris Harrison's off the bachelor for good he got paid off i guess paid like 50 million um what other big events are going on the world off the top of my head

i love i'm still i'm still enjoying listening to the uh conversations going on about covid and how it came from a lab in china and how there's um you know more and more details coming out now people are having conversations about I feel like that's really interesting I just I don't know so yeah that's happening I gotta go thank you for hanging out with me um and supporting me on my one year podcast journey I'm less than 100 days out and I will be taking a vacation afterwards I think I'm going to Hawaii so uh that's happening for for sure and I'd like to be on the today show honestly like I think I said this very early on I said

I want to do something impressive so I'm gonna podcast seven days a week for a year and I want I want people to write about it I want to I want to be interviewed about it I want to be known for it I want to make it to the today's show for something impressive like that I think I'll say here's the thing here's the honest truth I think once I do the 365th episode I'm gonna go damn that was I'm that I'm pretty good at something or I'm like I'm impressed with myself that was pretty cool and impressive I did that but in the meantime until it's done I'm not impressed but it's not even gonna be done when it's done I'm not gonna stop podcasting and then I'm also in my head like I could go on another tangent for another hour and a half about this

like I'm in my head about and I'm having a little internal struggle with ending the show after a year and cutting back to like once a week or twice a week or something like that because what if I continued on for two years straight three years straight five years straight ten years straight like that's gonna that's like that would in 30 years 30 years of daily podcasting I'd be I'd leave a fucking legacy I would die like I would be written in the goddamn history books. At that point, if I stuck around for 30 years of daily podcasting, eventually that would catch wind, right? And people will be like, oh yeah, this is a, she's our daily bitch. She's our daily girl. Tune in every day. I might as well just get on the radio. You know what I mean?

At this point, I should get on a morning talk show, get on the radio every single day. But And I just like that idea of being in people's ears all the time like that. Because it's, I don't know. It's fun as fuck. It's so fun. I love podcasting. Do something every day you love and you'll never work a day in your life. And for me, that's podcasting.

So, I don't know. We'll find out. I still have until September 4th to make a decision, but I think I'll be proud of myself. I'll be super jazzed and like, woo, I did it. I did it for a year and then take a little vacay and then I'll get back on

the grind. Maybe I'll reformat the show and it'll be something amazing. Maybe I'll actually do guests. I'm still brainstorming, installing and procrastinating because I don't want to do what I have to do after I stop recording and I have a sleepy voice because a bitch is tired guys my sleep schedule everything's been fucked you don't even know oh and I have exciting news oh my gosh so stay tuned I'm gonna tell the couch finale story tomorrow so you'll find out about my new couch and how that

all went down and ended because it's done but then maybe the next day or next week I have really exciting news to share about some big big girl big big time stuff so I don't know you'll uh that's a little teaser for you but you'll find out so um anyways hit that subscribe button hope you had a great day. I'm going to eat next to my laptop because I have to do work now and also eat dinner because I'm starving. I should just take a break and watch a YouTube video while I eat dinner, but grind don't stop. Podcasting never sleeps. Grind don't stop. Fuck. Hey, we're all going to die someday. None of this shit will matter. So there's your daily reminder that, uh, who cares? Love you. Have a great day and I'll talk to you tomorrow.

Okay. Bye.