The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 291- Catering A Menu And Moving To Spain

Episode Date: June 30, 2021

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What's up, guys? It's episode 291. Welcome back to the show. hey what's up welcome back to the show it's jacqueline hi um I haven't done this in a while so we're gonna do something new today well it's not even new I I've done this all the time in the past we're gonna do let me type it in a BuzzFeed quiz yeah we're gonna do a quiz on BuzzFeed to pass the time to get me through this episode uh as you know maybe you don't know I committed on September 4th 2020 committed to podcasting seven days a week for one year and it's been a struggle I've been talking recently about my journey and I'm currently struggling so I'm feeling like keeping it light keeping it fun keeping it you know maybe it's

going to be goofy. I don't know what this quiz is going to be about, but usually these BuzzFeed quizzes are kind of stupid and goofy. So that's the kind of mood I'm in today. I haven't found one yet, so we're going to find it together here on BuzzFeed.com. The reason I do these, honestly, it's kind of a cop-out because I let the quiz guide me through the episode versus me coming up with stuff to talk about on my own. But the reason I really like doing these is I end up telling a lot of stories and it gets me talking about things that I don't normally think about. So let's go to the quiz section here. Again, I haven't found one yet. Eat at this all-day buffet and will tell you which U.S. city you need to visit. Food quizzes are fun.

Cater a wedding off the kids menu to find out when you'll get married. That's kind of fun, using a kids menu. Here, let me keep looking. Are these the June, the popular June ones? I think they are. If you read less than half of these classic books, then I might be judging you. If you've read less than half of these classic books, I don't want to do that because I'm going to get judged and I know I'm going to barely answer any of those or barely click any of those books. I only read books, classic books that I had to in school. Like not by, I didn't read books. I didn't read classic novels for fun. It was only for like book reports and if it was assigned to me to read.

cater a food menu menu these are there's a lot of catering ones in june here cater a food menu and we'll give you a country you actually belong in that might be fun i do have a travel bug and that kind of looks exciting to do i'm curious what kind of friend are you friend quiz shop till you drop and we'll reveal your celeb soulmate is this is this annoying because I haven't picked a quiz yet or like I didn't come with a plan today like I didn't plan on which one to do I'm gonna do the cater a food menu menu and we'll give you a country you actually belong

in this will be interesting actually let's start with breakfast first question fruit smoothies fruit smoothies, churros and chocolate, excuse me, churros and chocolate, cake, okay, flat bread with cream, yogurt, bacon and egg sandwich, porridge, or pastries. Fruit smoothies, I have a story to tell there is a moment or there is a phase in elementary school or during elementary school where I think this was when Costco first got built in my town and they would do those blender demonstrations of yeah yeah I think this was this was it I think we ended up buying a blender from Costco like a smoothie blender and up until that point I think we just had a food processor like I don't think my parents drink smoothies or we didn't really drink smoothies or have a

blender like that so it was our first one and we went through a phase of drinking of making smoothies before school every single morning and we would buy a bunch of frozen fruit at Costco in the freezer section and we'd buy bananas and peanut butter and I don't think we would put like my mom would sneak in spinach and kale and stuff and then I don't think we added like protein or anything but um oh my god and I think our milk we would just use two percent milk to like make it thinner or whatever we wouldn't use water we'd use just milk and I grew up with two percent milk like that's what we drank and then I converted like obviously I just drink almond milk now um not not in a glass like I never just pour myself does anyone do that does anyone out there who

drinks almond milk in their you I feel like like coffee people do that when they're in their lattes and stuff um do people out there just drink almond milk as a side beverage to their like dinner like in because growing up we would have a glass of milk with dinner or lunch or whatever like you'd have that on the side to drink. But I never do that with almond milk. That's strictly for coffee or cereal. That's interesting to think about. But anyways, but yeah, we had a fruit smoothie phase. But back to the question, I got to pick a breakfast. And whatever I choose, whatever options, or whatever answers I choose, will tell me which this quiz will tell me which country I belong in I mean I'm just gonna go with my heart

cake for breakfast bitch I really you know I don't know um I've been eating a lot of yogurt bowls lately there's nothing like a croissant and a coffee I'm going pastries for breakfast is that yeah I'm going pastries I don't care pick some lunch next question hot dogs lobster greek salad poutine butter chicken kebabs paella paella paella paella paella paella it's got mussels on it or barbecued meat pick a lunch I feel like this is kind of obvious like if I pick the Greek salad it's like

oh you should move to Greece or poutine it's like go to Canada which country I belong and then butter chicken maybe that's like oh India why does barbecued meat sound really good out of all of these options I just want some fucking meat

on a grill I don't know kebabs are great I'm gonna go kebab kebab kebab I'm going kebab pick some dinner okay next question is this short I think this is kind of a short quiz great short quiz the short quiz means we're gonna have a short podcast I'm gonna get you guys in here and out real quickly I'm gonna shuffle you through shuffle you out it's kind of my new style here on the show I've been doing a lot of short podcasts and it's kind of fun it's kind of like a little um appetizer for your day you don't need a main course from me anymore we've we've I've dished out 290 some episodes now we're done with the

oh with the hour plus episodes I think I've approached two hours before alone talking to myself for that long. So we're doing little bite-sized podcasts now. And cause I'm also just like, holy shit. I've been podcasting 290 days in a row and I am getting, I'm approaching burnout. Pick some dinner, Jacqueline. Okay. Chicken wings, lasagna, broquettes, brochettes, bruschettis bruschettis broquettes ratatouille i don't know that word fish tandoori chicken soup uh fuck now we all know my opinion about soup or potatoes with sauce pick a dinner oh my god what are bro broquettes is that like chicken on a skewer i bet that's from brazil that looks like a Brazilian dish fish see you y'all know my opinion about soup uh I've ranted

about it enough I won't say it again but uh definitely I'm not picking I'm definitely not picking soup potatoes with sauce for dinner you just eat potatoes with a sauce on top I'm into that are there countries out there that just eat potatoes and a sauce for dinner maybe you have a salad on the side, but, like, what? I don't know why that looks funny. The picture's kind of funny. Ratatouille. I need some meat going on in my dish. Lasagna looks bomb. Chicken wings looks great. I'm going potatoes with sauce. Something about it sounds good right now. I'm going with my heart. that sounds great um pick some dessert next question greek yogurt okay that's not dessert but whatever tiramisu tiramisu ice cream chocolate cake crepes donuts macarons macarons

how do you say that macarons macarons macarons or cheesecake um i have an opinion about donuts for a dessert like eating like okay let's say we go out to dinner or no we just eat dinner doesn't matter if we're out to dinner or we're eating in and then after dinner we eat donuts for dessert that seems wrong like to me donuts are a morning food only like not a post-dinner not as a dessert not as a dessert not even a little gourmet donut hole with fucking Nutella at a fancy restaurant like you know how you see those sugary donut hole things sometimes at restaurants and they have a little chocolate sauce dip it in after no I also don't want a churro no I don't want a churro I don't I've never been a fan it's not that I don't

like them it's just that it's not it's just not it kind of churros to me are missing something like I I want a funnel cake or I want an elephant ear I want to I want it flat I don't want it in a tube if I'm eating something in a tube it's wrapped in a fucking it's a it's a hot dog product it's a sausage product it's a anything tubular that's not sausage is uh not okay like what's a food that's like actually kind of good that's a tube I've been eating a lot of zucchinis lately so I can't say that but like a dessert item on a stick in the or in the form of a two, like a churro. I don't know. It doesn't sit right with me. Um, pick a dessert, pick a dessert. I'm looking here and I'm honestly leaning towards ice cream or tiramisu. Cause I just had

some amazing tiramisu up in Washington. Tiramisu. Um, my go-to is ice cream. Like I have to go with my heart and I feel like that's what it wants. So we're going ice cream. Um, pick something to drink coffee tea water cocktails beer juices white wine or red wine okay well we all know i want coffee all the time every day so but i'm eating is this what am i catering for myself here well i'm catering a food menu well we're eating fucking what did i choose for dinner all right i picked a kebab oh my god we're eating kebabs and potatoes and ice cream we're having fucking beer i'm not drinking i'm not drinking white wine with that i'm not drinking a cup of tea with that i'm drinking fucking beer i gotta i gotta

curate my menu here i gotta do this the right way i'm not just gonna this isn't gonna i don't want this to feel random I want this to flow so we're drinking beer finally pick a view finally pick a view to have while eating you guys can't see these pictures so I'll explain them pick a view to have while you're eating so we've got a mountain range and there's there's a it's like all it's a bunch of green fluffy tree looking mountains and a river going through it it's like a valley picture and then we've got definitely that's Greece because of the white building and this the view I know that is Greece we've got so this is literally like just pick the country you want to move to like these are all places in the world so the other one is a bunch of

of glowing buildings that kind of look moroccan-y if that makes sense like they kind of have pretty shaped windows next image i don't know where in the world this is but it's giving it's giving me like the mountains are the color of the grand canyon but the mountains are not shaped that way they're shaped like mountains and it's it looks it doesn't even look dry but it like it there's like a bunch of water there's a lake where is this I don't know uh we got the middle of a desert with a bonfire that looks like something they do in Dubai we've got definitely Bora Bora Bora Bora I know that's Bora Bora this is definitely the

next picture so it's like clear blue water clear shallow water palm trees white sand the next picture is where's this at I recognize it also blue water but it's got some rocky cliffs around it this looks kind of like Thailand I feel like that's Thailand and the final picture looks like Pacific Northwest. I'm looking at two red canoes and a bunch of evergreen trees and glaciers in the background. I'm feeling like that's a Northwest or Canada, Canadian view. So what does it say? Finally pick a view to have while you're eating these kebabs and potatoes with sauce. We're not in Greece for sure. What makes sense? I'm like in this, I'm like, you know what, just because of where I grew up, I feel like I got to go with the last one.

The two red canoes in a, it's, this looks like a lake next to a mountain range. It's beautiful and there's snow in the background I feel like I got to go with that because all the other pictures are like oh yeah they're cute like oh yeah tropical I could go to Bora Bora but like I don't know I'm kind of um I mean I live in California I've been I've lived here officially now for three years and I mean I'm palm tree I'm tropical I mean I see palm trees every day in sunshine so it's not I'd rather go now I'm kind of itching to go somewhere northern northern and colder and like yeah I'm gonna go with the last one okay when I click the picture it's gonna tell me which country I belong in based on these choices so here we go boom bitch I belong it says

Spain that's all it says Spain and there's a picture of Barcelona so Barcelona cater a food cater a food menu and we'll give you a country you actually belong in Spain boom that was kind of fun um I didn't know what to expect with this I didn't know if it would be worth my time and I honestly feel like it wasn't but we talked about what did I tell you guys at the beginning I told you guys a smoothie story about my family making smoothies I told you guys my opinion about churros uh potatoes with sauce did i mention anything about that i feel like so many i mean every every did i tell oh guys fun okay here's a story

i'm looking at the pictures of potatoes or yeah um my great great grandpa i believe great great great or triple great came built he built a potato farm or whatever yeah he had his own potato farm like my my relatives my elders what are they called my extended god damn it my ancestors my ancestors were potato farmers and I think they came over from probably England I don't know uh it was called Dean's something in Washington but yeah that was kind of that's kind of my background I come from a farming background my family my extended family my ancestors my great-greats my great-great-grandpas were potato farmers and that trans transitioned into dairy farming and now nobody farms so but yeah that might be a

there's a fun story for you we have old videos I remember for my culture fair project um in middle school or something I had to make a poster board about my family or I think I did like a family tree thing what was that the it wasn't the culture fair I don't yeah I think it was but I remember my grandma dug up my grandma dug up a bunch of old black and white videos of the potato factory of my grandpa's potato factory and they the it showed the assembly line of how they like how the potatoes came off the truck onto the conveyor belt and how there was like a bunch of I think it was mostly women working this must have been during the war or something I don't know but um they had like dresses on too and they were like sorting the

potatoes on the conveyor belt and then there was like a boxing section um for some for some reason black and white videos I'm sure this is just how things were this has to do with the frame rate or whatever but everything looked like it was sped up but then I kind of thought I was like no these people just worked really fucking hard back in the day and they just moved that fast like sometimes I see old black and white videos of people like walking through a city in their suit with their briefcase in New York or whatever you know those old and they're like walking kind of fast everything's moving really fast I'm like that's just how people worked hard back then that's just how fast they moved people were efficient but yeah the conveyor belt potato videos were on display

at the culture fair next to my poster board and I had a bunch of black and white photos glued up there and there's nothing like a trifold poster board and a seventh grade project like that I don't know I feel like that was such a just like making a poster board feels like such a pastime like I don't know when I'm ever gonna have to do that again for a grade like that doesn't exist anymore. Getting a grade on a poster board. God, I'm getting old. It's so weird though. I did have that. I had that epiphany when I graduated college. I'm like, grades, I like, I don't have to perform for a grade anymore. Like I perform obviously in other ways and you know, for my, for my jobs and stuff but like it's not like I have to study for a test and get a grade like a 90% or whatever

I mean I guess I have on certain training tests for like for some of my jobs but I don't know you guys get what I mean you just you got all your life striving for the a that 95% what is it 94 is an a minus like you know and then it's like one day you graduate college and then it's like poof it's so weird I don't know anyways life's better on the other side I'll tell you that I like being an adult there's so much freedom and just life now and it feels great and I like being in the driver's seat and having total control versus having to like live with my parents and having to go through the system and having to do all of these little tasks and check off check off all these boxes even throughout college to like

I don't know it's like all that's what I had to do to get myself to this point I guess it's like what we all do life's weird like I don't want to think too deep but like the system whoa we really did that like I don't know school's crazy sometimes when I think about it you are I'm like dude I think it's not I'm grateful for my education I'm grateful that I went to a private school too I feel like that taught me or I like I feel like that I had a lot of discipline when I was really young from teachers not only my parents but I feel like my the teachers at my private school were really everything about my life growing up was strict and rigid and I think that was good for me in the long term and I learned I really learned how to respect adults

and like like because I remember going to high school going to public school for the first time kids in class were so rude to the teachers and I was like if I did this in my other at my old school like I would be expelled like the way they would talk I'm like I don't know I think that's just something that was expect expected of us and it was I just feel like it's obvious to like respect I don't know but whatever um anyways what else what else could I talk about for some reason I wanted to tell stories about like the cafeteria days cafeteria days in elementary school what could I say about that I don't know just like walking into the cafeteria my the cafeteria in my elementary school was inside of uh the old gymnasium before we built the new gym and it

always smelled like a gym too when you walked in there smell it smelled like gym like gym and refried beans and like hot lunch food and old milk because the first thing you do when you walked in that gym to get lunch was pick up your milk milk the carton of milk in a silver like cart thing the refrigerated cart and we'd all like line up and you'd walk in you grab the green one was one percent the blue one was two percent you grab let me think about this when we would do roll call throughout elementary school I went all the way I went to the same school all the way through eighth grade private school and throughout the entire time when we did roll call in the morning

when the teacher did you would tell the teacher if you wanted a milk or not yeah that was such a or a hot lunch so she would she would log that you were here and then she would tick next to your name milk milk or I think yeah everyone would be like hot lunch hot lunch milk milk milk and you just like hear hot lunch milk milk hot lunch milk milk over and over and over it grosses me out over and over again every single day you'd say here and then your preference of like what you wanted or pass I think was passes neither neither um but yeah you'd walk in the cafeteria, you get your milk. I just hate that word for some reason. It's like moist. I just like, well, actually moist doesn't bother me that much. Milk does, but you'd go on the, you'd go

through the line. And then if you were getting hot lunch, you would type in your number. Mine was one three two Oh two. I still remember one three two zero two enter. And my friend Andy's dad was always the hot he was the hot lunch man he always stood at that little computer with the keyboard or like the number pad every single day forever like he was there for so many years doing that and that that was like his thing like the lunch he was like the lunchroom dad and he would put in your number and you'd keep walking on throughout the line and then you'd go up to the little counter and then there was a styrofoam white tray with whatever on it for lunch that day and then you take that and go sit down but just looking back like oh my god the fucking

turkey gravy mashed potato lunch with the corn on the side was in the and the roll was so fucking wrong like it was so oh here's the thing I ate it everyone fucking ate it it did taste it actually kind of tasted good but the visual of it was so nasty like the fucking gravy like rubber like but um we would we would have phases as kids like we would go and there's a couple mormon boys on bicycles outside i haven't seen that in a while they're wearing soon they're wearing their white i know i know what they're doing they're biking and they've got their tie and their button-down shirt on they're not selling AT&T wireless or whatever the fuck they're not going door-to-door selling AT&T they're selling fucking uh Mormonism right they're trying to is that what they do I

don't even know I just know they go door-to-door knock on people I I've been I've had that happen to me before they knock on the door they're sweet they're sweet guys actually the last time I ran into the, um, not those two, but back where I used to live, two kids in those outfits came up to my door to offer, they offered to help me move. Like, Hey, I see that you're moving out today. If you need an extra hand, just let us know. We live upstairs and we can help you if you need help. I was like, that is the sweetest thing. And they actually did. They helped me a lot. because they got my they helped me with my big like six foot tall mirror I have that's it's stupid that I own it but it's so hard to lift alone and I obviously need help with it so they

they were sweet and they helped me um but we would go back to what I was saying we would go in phases as kids with um hot lunches where my maybe my parents are super busy and we they weren't packing us lunches or we weren't packing our own and we would just get hot lunch every single day of the week and it wasn't that bad I mean I kind of you kind of just get used to it and you kind of weird you start it's kind of I mean I'm a trash panda with food like I don't really have I'm not a picky eater but you kind of like end up you start liking it you know I don't know anyways okay I think I'm gonna end this episode so I'm moving to Spain apparently or this based on my food preferences and my how I catered this menu buzzfeed.com recommends I moved to Spain so that's cool

again these are kind of these are all stupid all these quizzes are just cheesy stupid they make they make no sense but I do them anyways and then I end up talking about school lunches and potato farming and like I don't even know what else I talked about today but it helps me come up with topics and yeah so hope you hope you enjoyed this episode hit that subscribe button I'm here seven days a week and I will talk to you tomorrow okay bye