The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 339- See You Next Tuesday

Episode Date: April 25, 2023

Today I talk about my trip to LA last weekend, what I did on 4/20, my Air movie review, the 'King' Ryan Garcia vs. Gervonta 'Tank' Davis fight, my recap of the Night Stalker documentary on Netflix, Trump's interview on the Full Send Podcast, looking like a PTA mom, why I don't have bad mental health days anymore, what's in my car, and MORE!! Thanks for listening, ILYSM! :) BECOME A PATRON! https://www.patreon.com/tjms KEEP IN TOUCH! INSTAGRAM » https://www.instagram.com/jacquelinemonroe/  TIKTOK » jacqueline.monroe EMAIL THE SHOW! [e-mail] MY MUSIC GUY: https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic SPONSORS Spotify for Podcasters

what's up guys it's episode 339 welcome back to the show hey what's up it's jacqueline welcome back to the show hi um this is what i've got for you today all right it's earth day happy earth day i'm gonna recap my trip to la last weekend i'm gonna talk about um the air movie i saw last night the michael jordan air movie the ryan garcia versus what's his last name davis fight happening tonight excuse me uh yeah Gervonta Gervonta Davis Gervonta Gervonta I don't know I'm gonna talk about the fight tonight Trump was on NELC I'm gonna talk about that Domino's just came out with tater tots of course I need to talk about that and finally I'm gonna recap oh wait I'm

gonna talk about my 420 and uh this true crime documentary I watched on Netflix that has my mind fucking blown you might have seen it already but I haven't and came out a couple years ago but I want to talk about it so that's what I have for you today full transparency full honesty I don't really feel like I'm in the mode yet but as I talk it'll you know I'll get my I'll get in the groove I'm sipping here's the um the beverages of the podcast today are black coffee and water okay i know yawn but that's what's happening um let me continue to set the scene i'm drinking black coffee i'm drinking water i have a full face of makeup wet hair and i'm sitting in cory's bathrobe because the ac is on because we have dogs now

excuse me we have uh the sun is out now here in california it's finally like 80 degrees in san Diego and uh the dogs are gonna die if we don't turn the AC on in the apartment so the AC's on I'm freezing okay that's why I'm drinking hot coffee and wearing this fucking bathrobe it's literally like this is the comfiest thing I have two bathrobes I don't wear my own bathrobes I only wear Cori's because it's just so nice and thick what else is going on I worked out this morning. What time is it? It's 11 52 AM on Saturday. We did, um, a little workout. We went and got coffee. What else is going on? Sorry. Um, Oh, I had, here's my workout. This is what I did today. I think I did the same workout last weekend on Saturday. I did stair master intervals where I,

I start off at like speed eight and I do that for 10 minutes and I get my heart going and then I crank it crank it down to four and then for like 10 to 15 minutes or until I literally feel like I'm gonna die I go up to 18 for a minute and then I rest for a minute up to 18 for a minute and I rest for a minute and I probably did that I overdid it here's the thing this is the thought I had on the Stairmaster and just me and so I talk about my um workouts and going to the gym like I mentioned that here and there on the show and like my and how obnoxious it is when I work out like I think I probably think I look more obnoxious than I actually do but I just like today I'm literally like snotting like it's so bad I have like phlegm coming out

I'm coughing up shit from my you know I don't know what was in my throat I had phlegm in my throat and I'm doing these sprints on the the middle stairmaster in the middle of the fucking gym and I was telling Corey like when we got home I was like I want it to look like like when someone sees me work out I immediately want them to think she's overdoing it she's trying way too hard this is like too intense like uh she clearly is trying to work off a pizza she had last night she definitely has body dysmorphia and eating disorder she's overdoing cardio she's a cardio bunny she's mentally ill like this is like she's fit she doesn't need to do it this hard you know what i mean like i want someone that's how i want it to uh look when i work out i want to look that

it fucking mentally insane so i achieved that today i know that like when i get off the stairmaster and it's a fucking lake in front of me i know that i did my job and i know that people around me were probably thinking that um i was actually uh there they would be right about working out the pizza i was actually working off chicken tenders and fries today and also a pack of peanut m&ms and three four margaritas um so that was from uh we we got a upper lip sweating already from wearing this goddamn hot bathrobe um we went and saw the air movie last night so um yeah i don't know if you're like that when you work out but like i just fucking like i want people to fucking go like

what is her fucking problem? Like she's going too hard. Um, cause you know, when you see those people, you're like, it's just, it's like annoying. It's like fucking relax. That's how I want to be obviously joking. Like, again, it's like me thinking I look more, uh, crazy than I actually do but um cool so that's what I did this morning um what else is happening oh I'm going over to a friend's house to watch the fight tonight so that'll be fun Corey's golfing right now and that's why I'm recording honestly and you know what's weird like I don't get embarrassed in front of him like nothing I do embarrass yeah I don't get embarrassed or like in my head or nothing around him but for some reason like the thought of him sitting on

the couch behind me while I'm recording is like it makes me so uncomfortable I'm like get the like if he's if he sometimes he'll tell me like you should do the podcast and I'm like are you gonna be home and he's like yeah and I'm like no like you need to get out of the house you need to go find something to do so I don't know what that is I think it's because it's like my this is like when I'm fully it's like my me time it's it's like I'm all by myself with my microphone um I don't know what I'm saying does is that like stage fright I think I have fucking stage fright with my own boyfriend over my podcast over recording my podcast in front of him um so yeah that's kind of what's happening happening today I am definitely gonna lay out in

a couple hours it's what's the uv index um oh my fuck oh my fuck um 10 very high oh my god perfect day to lay out I live near the beach um see if I so I'm I live in San Diego I could say I live by the I live I'm a block away which is fucking incredible um but that could mean there's like an entire peninsula. No, there's an entire, uh, there's like a hundred miles of beach around here. Like you wouldn't be able to tell where I live based on like me just saying, Oh, I live a block from the beach, but I'll be walking down there in my bikini with my fucking, um, bootcraft, hard kombucha and my book and my, uh, tanning chair and my beach towels, my headphones and what else am i gonna bring my sunscreen i'll be walking down there in a couple

hours it's gonna be great i cannot i it's that time of year i it just smells different you know what i mean it the sun came out so yesterday was friday that was our first like 80 degree day here in san diego and you know how the you you know how when it rains it smells a certain way well when it gets hot hot you have a blue sky and it's like it starts getting like hot in the like 9 a.m that it's it just smells it smells like a like it's gonna be a sunny day one of my fucking hey hey Jacqueline talk about the shit you listed off in the beginning I don't really like this coffee wait hold on so when we get coffee every morning go to this place and Cory says one regular one vanilla and he gets his vanilla essenced black coffee which is so I'm

drinking it now it kind of tastes like a candle so yeah um I love this time of year I'm gonna lay out it smells good it smells like a hot sunny day what am I I said what am I saying already Jacqueline get to the next topic okay so last week I told you that I was going up to LA with Corey's family for a one-year-old birthday party and uh during last week's episode his mom texted me about what kind of sandwiches I liked and I had a hunch I was like I think she's gonna pack this for the car trip up there because we were going we were going up there around lunchtime like you know I just had a feeling and yep I was right she packed an entire fucking picnic with like little um like picnic cloths uh for the ride up there and we literally ate like she just kept

passing i was in the front seat cory's cory was driving and his parents were in the back like during the trip up there i probably had six sandwiches i had like two tuna no i probably had like eight wait a minute we started with tuna because her tuna is the best we started with that she also gave us chips her neighbors oranges from the tree from their tree almonds smokehouse almonds um we brought a diet ginger ale this is very specific but i'm trying to recall what we what exactly we ate and is there something else oh those nature valley granola bars the the peanut butter ones i think you can get them at costco or like that's where i've gotten them before they're like the orange um i felt like i was like this was the type of

this was like a school lunch happening you know it was like so nostalgic and yeah she passed us up a tuna sandwich we had that next up we had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because she asked me if i like peanut butter and jelly and i said hell yes and i cannot tell you the last time i had one so then i had a peanut butter and jelly but she's like do you want me to put chips in the middle and I was like sure I've never had that before so she put um potato chips in the middle of the peanut butter and jelly sandwich then we ate that she's like okay time for turkey then we had turkey now the reason I'm telling you about all these sandwiches is because there's more more sandwiches happened later in the day okay um I will all get to that and

um this was a sitting day and a sitting day and an eating day this was last Saturday um so then we get the turkey sandwich and then we rotate back to the tuna then another peanut butter and jelly and then I think the turkey she only made one turkey because it's not the best one she made more tuna than turkey then we ended up having like two more tunas fucking granola I just ate so much and guys TMI but like I didn't take a shit that morning so I was like really like I was just stuffing food in and I knew this this is the thing like when in Rome right like I'm with his parents on the way to LA for this fun little birthday party with and I'm gonna meet a bunch of new family members and his mom took all his time to pack these lunches and I just I was like I'm

eating bitch I'm gonna fucking fuel up for this party I know there's gonna be food once we get to the party and I'll get to that um but yeah I was just kind of like feeling like oh god and I took like a the car ride took forever because there was a crash and the traffic was terrible and I ended up taking like an hour and a half nap after I ate all that anyways we show up at the party and immediately go to the taco station outside they had like an authentic taco setup with like um there was like people they hired making them and I got like two carne asada tacos was it a shrimp taco no fish taco chips and guac I had a piece of cake like it was just like more food after I just had like eight sandwiches and all those snacks and then at that point I was

chugging water I was like okay I need to like you know flush this shit out and nothing happened I was still bloated as fuck and it was fine um I made it uh the party was amazing um super cute they had all these like like it was like a fairy theme they had these fairy decorations and um we got a little house tour because they remodeled the house there and that was cool what else did we do there um took a bunch of pictures we watched a one-year-old tear apart a little cake which is so cute she was so like dainty about it you can tell like I've noticed this being around babies lately lately like you can tell like boy babies versus girl babies like the way they act is so like the girl babies are more like

dainty and like she didn't just tear it apart like she took her time she's like really gentle with it but I know like uh Corey's nephew who's what is he two now almost two or a year and a half he would just fucking destroy that thing so I don't know it was cute um after that we literally were in the car on the way to LA for like I think it took three and a half hours from San Diego it was horrible then we went to the party from like 2 30 to like five okay then it's 5 p.m we're in LA we need to get to San Diego but first because they have a family tradition of going to this uh johnny's hop pastrami place we stopped by johnny's hop pastrami and we got a bunch of sandwiches okay we got i think we ordered

six hop pastrami sandwiches and like four shrimp fried shrimp sandwiches and i honestly my fucking fat ass at that point of the fuck it day with food i don't know if you've ever i mean this is like sometimes you just have those days where you're like you're just you're just saying fuck it left and right with with everything in front of you food wise like you're just like okay oh i also like i had cake there and i had like six brownies and a bunch of cookies with cory we were like stealing them while they were everyone else is mingling and shit um but yeah my fucking fat ass we show up at this johnny's hot pastrami place i like they hyped it up so much they're like these are the best pastrami sandwiches you'll ever have like oh my god so i'm thinking

oh like we're gonna eat these in the car on the way back to san diego no no his dad put them in the trunk okay they were in the back and we got diet cokes and we just drank those on the way home instead so the car started smelling like pastrami and it smelled really good and i had to fucking sit there with my hands under my ass like you know waiting i you know i had to wait that out but um anyways we get home and i am just internally a fucking little fat kid okay it's like 9 p.m all right the point of getting those sandwiches was for the next day his mom was like you know we're gonna get these and you can like have them for lunch tomorrow okay i was like all right and anyways it's like

9 p.m we get home and immediately cory we're talking about heating him up he's like okay because i was like can you heat him up because he knows how to do it because there's like a special way to put them in the microwave and just take them apart and shit so we fucking eat these sandwiches like 9 30 p.m did we have and after that he's like you know he wanted ice cream we didn't get ice cream but it was we almost did so the sandwiches were like the size of my head and then we put what did we it came with like pickles we put mustard on it we got this like dill pickle mustard and yeah it was just like a fucking fat fest last or on that night but um anyway so there's my LA recap um it was super fun but definitely like a long haul like driving up

to LA and going there and back in one day and just like sitting in a car sitting around like tables and mingling with people like I was just like sitting and eating um no complaints like the food was very good so um I just after that trip I was like I don't eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches enough like often enough I mean there is it's just a perfect food like certain foods are perfect peanut butter and jelly Reese's peanut butter cups pizza um just like a plain cheese pizza is a perfect food um yeah I haven't told you guys this but I do this thing with Corey when we go go out to restaurants where we we categorize things as like 10 out of 10 foods and where were we where were we at the other day and I was like this is a 10

out of 10 oh we had baklava at this greek place and I was like this is immediately a 10 out of 10 like best thing I've ever put in my mouth that's how that's how we rate it like if if it is so good how do you it's like you can't it's like you you take a bite out of it and you're just like you're like fuck off this is like not real like this is so good I own my like you want to start swearing you want to have 10 rounds of the same thing you just want to keep eating it over and over that's a 10 out of 10 food so um those hot pastrami sandwiches we decided were that that was a 10 out of 10 but he was telling me and I've never been to New York City but he was telling me that the what's that deli there the famous deli where you get that really tall pastrami

sandwich something deli famous it's new york city deli here i'll give you guys some silence for a sec because i've been talking fucking fast um famous nyc deli pastrami what's it called it's on the tip of my tongue cats is delicatessen no it's not cats is foodnetwork.com harry's no open gallery i don't want to go through this what what's it called carnegie deli carnegie deli he was telling me that that's 15 times better than this johnny's tapas chami place and there's this place next to johnny's by the way maybe you've been there if you've if you live in la or if you've been up there um it was like tito's tacos and they also

love that place and i was looking up the yelp reviews on it and like it's literally hard corn taco shells with like taco taco me and like i don't know maybe maybe a couple other toppings and then literal thick shredded unmelted cheddar cheese just all over the top and i'm like how is that like but people hype this place up like it's the best taco restaurant or taco place in la and i'm like cold hard shredded cheese on the top of this hard corn taco shell is like why is this the why is this the food episode guys sorry sorry um am i hungry i had a smoothie had a green smoothie um before this i've had two cups of black coffee should probably drink water um yeah so let's get to the next topic jesus

oh my god uh i really want to talk about this documentary i watched the night stalker have you guys ever heard of it or seen it it's from was it 2000 when did it come out i think it was a 2021 documentary on netflix but um the reason it blew my mind was because it didn't show the killer until like the very last episode like halfway through so this entire time they're building up they're talking about this guy did i already say it's called the night stalker yeah i did they're building it up talking about how it was in 1985 right let me double check um his crime spree took place in california between june 1984 and august 1985 june to august so like a year um yeah they were building building

it up basically saying how this killer on the loose would creep into people's houses through their windows or just like right through their front door in the middle of the night and uh he'd either shoot you in the head of the 22 and slash your throat um or r-word you if you're a woman and tie you up with electrical cords or if you were a minor a young child like a six-year-old he wouldn't molest you and then like let you go and have you call the cops and have your parents show up at like a 7-eleven or he like had this girl yeah like run into a gas station and he told her like go call go call 9-1-1 and then tell them to have your parents come pick you up or something crazy like that so yeah and if a lot of the times you go in if you

if there was a couple he would shoot the husband and then our word the wife and then which sometimes she would live um he beat people with like someone there was a woman there were survivors of this like people that got beaten up really bad that didn't die or what other survivors were there um people who oh like heard a weird noise and then in the middle of the night like the guy was clearly like trying to break in their house and then it scared him off because they woke up or whatever like they got lucky um so the cops they were interviewing during this documentary were on to this guy after you know there was like a pattern happening because obviously it's la there's a shit ton of murders i mean not a shit i don't know what the

numbers were back in the 80s but murders were sort of kind of common and they're basically like okay we've got a pattern here um you know it's random though like he doesn't have a type this killer just fucking goes for whoever and but they're having like a pattern with when they would come to the crime scene and the and find like the the shell it would be a for it would be from a 22 so that was a pattern they started noticing and the footprints they found were all the same and it was actually from a avia sneaker i think it was avia which was like a really uncommon sneaker at the time and they actually figured out that that avia sneaker there was only one size 11 or something shipped to LA at the time so yeah it was really crazy um or that that part

but I don't know maybe you've seen this maybe I'm recapping something you already know about but like I didn't know who the killer was I didn't see his face until the last episode they finally what was it people were describing him as so what I liked about this the reason I'm even talking about it is because it was I've been on a true crime or murder uh a murder show porn murder porn uh kick lately and literally just because I live with a man and I feel safe because back when I lived by myself I would never watch anything that gave me the ebgbs that made me scared like I was watching light-hearted you know like reality tv real housewives like youtube vloggers and podcasts on youtube like i could not stomach seeing murder shit so by myself so like

i'm on this kick now that's why i'm talking about it and the back to the night stalker the reason why this mind fucked me was because um i was building up in my house or i was thinking up a picture in my head of what this guy looked like the whole time i never googled it i never you know there was like four episodes so i was over over time i'm thinking oh this is gonna be like a scary looking dude they mentioned his teeth were all jagged and and fucked up he was tall slender white or uh lights a light-skinned mexican is what people described him as um yeah and messed up teeth obviously like a size 11 shoe um so yeah the craziest fucking thing is cory and i went to went golfing or something we were decided we decided to get tacos after

and finish the last episode and he he saw this before so he was telling telling me don't look him up you know this can be a big surprise like i want you to like you know i want you to watch the documentary documentary to find out what he looks like so i'm sitting there eating my carne asada tacos with him and there he is richard ramirez on the screen they finally show who the Night Stalker is who the killer is and I gasped I was like I was like I was like he's kind of hot what the fuck he's kind of he's he looks like a goddamn Gucci model and he has like okay when he was in court and they started like showing more videos of him he started looking more scary but the mugshot the first picture I was like that's not what I expected I thought he was gonna look

way like i don't know he just had a beautiful bone bone structure in my opinion i was not expecting that and i was not expecting like the nice face and the nice eye like his eyes were kind of i get why people would be terrified of them because they're like big and beady but like literally like he looked like again a gucci model or some shit like it was such a mind fuck um i didn't really see there was one picture of his teeth he's like doing like shark fangs at the camera um and then what was weird is they like let him wear sunglasses in court i don't know um which made him look even hotter no i'm kidding let me look up on google images again um richard ramirez i think he killed

like 20 some people um oh first degree murder 12 counts second degree murder or rape 11 counts first degree burglary 14 counts 19 death sentences 15 plus victims span okay um i'm not saying i'm not saying he's like making it sound like i think he's super hot i just think he's a good looking uh fuck i can't believe i just said that i can't i now i'm looking on google images i i i'm walking that back it was just like the initial picture that's what it was for me it was like a whoa like not a oh wait here's when he's

how old was he at the time oh yeah he was a devil worshiper that's the thing he was like he had like that um five point star thing and he would like draw that on people's walls and like their lipstick after he killed them so and i guess he had a really fucked up childhood um now i'm in my head about saying i thought he was good looking because i'm looking at these pictures like actually he was scary like he was like what did he say in court like his um his last words he got sentenced to death by the way and ended up dying in prison from cancer like how old was he he died on june 7th 2013 um from cancer um let me read if there's anything on this

ramirez's childhood is considered as is considered an influence on his crimes frequently abused abused by his father ramirez began developing gruesome and macabre what's that word i've seen that before macabre macabre macabre interests in his early in mid-teens from his older cousin Miguel who also taught him some of the military skills that he would go on to use during his year-long killing spree I was thinking about I got I got scared as fuck when we um were watching these episodes like every night I'm like Corey are the windows shut are the windows are the doors locked like because just the thought of like you're just peacefully sleeping and someone creeps in your house and fucking shoots you in the head like i mean it's

it was so random that's what was scary about it i'm like if i lived in la at the time um like one of the detectives wife wives wives wife she had to like grab the kids and like leave la because she was so freaked out when it literally happened like a neighborhood over from her one night so yeah if I was I would have to leave I don't think I could if you knew because you know people the public started becoming aware of this and um yeah like I wouldn't be able to sleep at night because it was so random that's what was fucking crazy about it so um that's what I was watching on Netflix this week um next topic uh we've got Donald Trump on NELC he was interviewed by on the full send podcast again um is that what they're called the nelk boys are they still the

nelk boys i don't really know i just know i saw clips on tiktok of him getting interviewed and i was like holy shit um they posted this yesterday 5.5 million views and it's not getting taken down so I remember on the last the last um YouTube or um full send interview with Trump why did they take it there's a reason they that YouTube took it down but they're not taking this one down um oh I wanted I wanted to read the comments on the on this YouTube um on the on the video here it's so funny that the nelf boys are the only median is the only median available for the public to hear what trump has to say with no censorship or bias it's really strange to see a politician being so relaxed during an interview i mean love him or hate him like

he's fucking funny sometimes and i on the clips on um tiktok or make me laugh that's why i'm bringing this up I was just like he said like they they listed off a bunch of people's names and he had to say like a word that comes to mind for each one and what did he say for I think he was like they're like Kim Jong-un he's like smart no what did not no he didn't say that what did he say then he's like Biden then they're like Biden he's like dumb um Kim Kardashian that he goes what's the word I forget something historic that I'm

always amazed by what you did is how you got along so well with all these world leaders especially Kim Jong Un what was he like as like a person because he's like such a mysterious Batman kind of like figure no one knows what he's like I want to play this whole thing I don't know

I'm trying to find the other one um anyways so yeah I just think it's um I just it's just so crazy like to see Trump I don't know like there's so many people cross-pollinating now like podcasters politicians um tiktok or like influencers and i don't know like everyone's just kind of like meshing in in this like really interesting way now on online like on youtube on tiktok like on all the platforms where you see like people you wouldn't expect get together get together and i guess that's what this is for me like with trump

it's like it's kind of it's such a mind fuck but i wanted to read here someone from sweden commented it's kind of a long a long comment hold on they go i'm from sweden i've always seen trump as a joke due to how he was portrayed and I have also debunked some of the false Biden videos some are doctored but surely many many Trump videos were as well and I didn't question it then however letting him just speak like here changed my mind I totally agree with him in many on many world issues so much more than I would ever think people should really view things without the mainstream media lens and their perceptions yeah that's what I love about podcasting obviously and people have talked about this a million times it's just so it's so much better to like listen to

a full like a full-length conversation with no edits it's you know of people that like politicians or just prominent figures because you you hear like the little blurbs in the media and the negative shit like a little it'll be like a little two-second thing that they did or said but you like don't ever get you never get the full context so it's just nice to see people like because you never see that side of politicians you never see them like talk for that long ever they're given speeches they're on you know they're like a talking head for two seconds on the news like it's never this so i'm all for it i think we need more of it and we need more um yeah like long-form conversations with politicians out there um because then you

you really get to see how they they think that goes for that goes for anyone you know recording yourself me recording this podcast talking it out this long is gonna give you a better idea of who i am than like me posting a 30 second tiktok of like one opinion i have on fucking uh candle scented vanilla essence black coffee that my boyfriend likes to drink um the amount of information i've gained from this man in just one interview is massive when others speak i feel like i'm getting dumber i don't know i'm just worried like if he gets re-elected fuck i feel like i just don't want the division to continue and the chaos to continue and i just know that if

gets re-elected it's gonna like he's obviously gonna have a massive amount of support he's obviously obviously gonna have a shit ton of you know people that are on board with what he decides to do and when he's in office again but then it's gonna be the media once again i want i'm just i'm just assuming they're just gonna repeat what they did when he was in office for four years and you know what i mean it's just gonna be annoying i just like hope honestly if he gets re-elected like i just hope that the fucking media can chill out and just like not make it their mission to destroy him again and just like and obviously that became how they made their money and obviously that's how they got their clicks and views and you know everything he

was doing was controversial and so it's easy to talk about and i mean a lot of things he did it's controversial um so yeah donald trump on full sun podcast says donald trump exposed the truth i haven't watched by the way i haven't watched this yet i've only seen a couple clips donald trump exposes the truth about kim jong-un world war iii and elon musk um should i reapply my lips i feel like it's time to reapply my lips this is mineral fusion like sheer moisture lip tint from my favorite grocery store back in back in mount vernon washington i think i talked about it on the last episode

um i just wish i had it in me like let's talk about my appearance like i just i love podcasting love sitting here and talking but the getting ready part for anything but especially this podcast stresses me out because like I'll be excited to record I'll be fresh off a workout I'll down a green smoothie I know it I know I know I'm gonna record that day and I'm like looking at my notes of things I wrote down throughout the week getting excited to talk about it and then I'm like oh shit I'm literally like sweaty from the gym I need to shower I need wash my hair I need to do my skincare and then I'm like I mean technically I could sit in front of the camera with a bare face and not give a fuck which I've done that in the past you go to

my first videos I look like I'm a different woman like it is insane to look back my original like my first YouTube podcast episodes it's kind of depressing like that's that was rock bottom for me and you can just you can clearly tell like it's I just look like shit um and I can say that like I have personal standards I know what I look like I know when I was in my lowest health and it was then so um but yeah I could sit here and just like let it fly with without putting makeup on but like I get in my head like oh I'm on camera I want to look nice you know and then I start doing my makeup and then I'm pouring it on thick because it's like you're on camera and you have to so it shows up and then I'm like oh fuck my hair and then my fucking outfit and then it's just like

I don't know then it takes away what I'm saying my creativity my flow my enthusiasm my excitement to record it takes away from that and then like I get I'll like put all this effort and energy into my goddamn appearance for the show and then it's like the show comes and I'm exhausted so that's why I did not I knew I was so I knew that if I continued to dry my hair and like change into a cute outfit I would I would be exhausted and I couldn't and I wouldn't have a good episode so but maybe this isn't a good episode maybe you're just like jocelyn like shouldn't say that uh we got uh okay we talked about la and all the goddamn sandwiches i ate i'm i'm hungry i i feel like i'm i'm definitely pmsing my appetite has been through the roof

this week and that's how i know like i'm very food focused right now and it's probably also because i worked out so god damn god damn hard um and when you eat shitty food i feel like your body craves shitty food so like i had a bunch of shit yesterday so i'm gonna literally no you know what i'm gonna do i get so excited to talk to talk about my day and my perfect little lifestyle so um i worked out i got ready for my podcast and recording after this i'm gonna walk the dogs and let them run around and you know get some fresh air then I'm gonna put on my bikini and get my like cover up on and get my beach stuff together and I'm gonna go grab um go to the store and grab like my little drinks my watermelon I'm probably gonna bring tahini with me from the cupboard to

put on my watermelon I'm gonna get a book you know I'm gonna do all that stuff get get prepped for the beach go to the beach lay out you know get a little buzz on because you know what I'm in that I'm in my drinking face before I talk about this Air Jordan movie I kind of want to talk about my alcohol consumption over the last two to three weeks because I feel like I have I go through phases with like all substances like not I don't mean I dabble with like literally three okay nicotine alcohol and weed that's it that's all that's all I touch but um I was telling you a few episodes ago that I one of Corey's friends gave him these edibles to try because he has like a company where they make those and so then we got them to try and then next thing you know for

like a month straight I'm taking edibles every single night before bed so I was I was in my weed edible phase okay now um let me just bring you up to speed it's been nice here in San Diego the sun's coming out and I don't know like every single afternoon I'm like itching for a drink I feel like my body's like want it wants to get a little buzz on when the sun's out and I don't know what that is I feel like there's something wrong with me I always feel guilty about um drinking like if it's like a weekday and I'm you know by myself here at the apartment like hanging with the dogs like wanting to have a little hard conversation I have it in my head and it's probably because of my uh family situation when I grew up having a dad

who had a problem with it and having a family history of alcoholism and me just being like no like I'm not because I'm not like I know I don't love getting drunk I don't love having a hangover you know me I'm like fucking green smoothies working out like a crazy person you know like going way too hard at the gym like I'm obsessed with health and like feeling not obsessed I'm I'm very balanced but I I live for that shit I love feeling good so lately I'm like every for like literally the last couple weeks I'm like maybe I'll have like two hard kombuchas a night like every other night maybe not every night like every maybe yeah it's kind of been like every day it's been like every day and then we went out when did I have drinks

we had drinks last night because I don't I've never gotten drunk in a movie theater oh my god that's what it was we're at this place here around where we live and you can order drinks and food to your recliner um in the theater you know while you're watching the movie and I'm like oh shit so I'm like ordering like literal like full-size margaritas over and over I'm like I think I had four and I'm like I'm like I've never sat in a movie with a buzz like this oh this is fun this is fun as shit so I don't know maybe I'm like I'm literally 28 I'm like more confident about saying my age lately I don't know why I'm like so like who gives a fuck I'm 28 there she said it but I'm like I think I'm experiencing or I'm like going through this phase for like the first time

with myself like maybe I do remember though like a year ago I don't know was this like when I moved to my old apartment I bought like a pack of white claws and put them in my fridge and I remember for like until that pack was gone I was having them every single night but like since then I literally just like go out for drinks with Corey or our friends or I go out and like to the club or whatever and like order like fucking tequila shots and shit and stay out all night it's either that or like his parents don't drink like we don't really well maybe they have drinks at their house maybe like here and there I'll have one there but it's like not my thing to just drink every day so I don't know I'm going through a phase I thought I'd tell you that um I think

I like drinking and I think I'm gonna be a summertime cocktail chick um i don't feel this is what's crazy is like i woke up refreshed as shit today and i don't know if it's because of this new supplement i'm taking which i'm gonna gatekeep and not tell you because i think i think there's gonna be an a total transformation um i'm actually cory's like can i share that with you and i'm like no like i spent i think this is the most I've ever spent on a supplement it was very expensive and the shit is like anyways I the reason I'm saying this is because I woke up I had all those margaritas last night and I felt incredible I was like I don't feel like hungover I feel like I can go work out and I won't feel

nauseous or anything like yeah but lately so what I want to get to and I don't know why I'm on this tangent about alcohol but I'm like oh I'm usually scared of having drinks during the week because I'm like that's a weekend thing first of all or I'm like I don't want to feel hungover the next day but I haven't felt fucking hungover I feel great and I'm like maybe I'm maybe this isn't that bad I don't know okay Dr. Amen isn't isn't he the brain scientist doctor guy that's like all of our Instagram reels and like he has all these videos out there I know my mom loves him and I know she's listening right now he would be like fuck alcohol like do not drink it's horrible for you even if you don't feel hungover there's like long-term effects it's probably you know

killing your brain cells but you know I know there's like negatives to it but I like feeling I like feeling uh it's like why do I drink I like a little buzz and a sunshine okay that's my why you got to know your why okay why am I podcasting because I fucking love it I feel like I'm flying why do I drink it's because I like a little in the sunshine I like to feel a little buzz I like to have a little you know I like to vibe out with my dogs and have a drink I don't know you know what I love is cleaning the house buzzed doing any chores buzzed cooking buzzed I used to do that too like back in college with my girlfriends we cook dinners for each other we drink wine cook dinners like we're fucking French and I'm like nothing wrong with that but here I am 28 like

having a goddamn existential crisis about having a hard kombucha on a sunny day so yeah there's my story whoa let's talk about the air movie that was loud sorry um am i recording yes i am let's talk about the air movie the air jordan movie um so i saw it last night i think like a couple months ago i saw the trailer for it and i remember getting like super amped up and excited and because i'm a former basketball player i love michael jordan like i've fucking nerded out to the last dance like twice like i'm a big fucking nike fan everything around like his you know era of basketball like i'm a fucking obsessed little um fangirl over here so i remember seeing the trailer and just going like oh shit

this is gonna be so good and it was this was a 10 out of 10 movie for me Matt Damon played um Sonny what's his last name Sonny is it Vaccaro Sonny Vaccaro and Ben Affleck played Phil Knight um Viola Davis I'm looking here at IMDB I'm not remembering this off the top of my head uh Michael Jordan actually picked out Viola Davis to play his mom in the movie and her name in the movie is Dolores or her actual name Michael Jordan's mom's name is Dolores Jordan and um yeah the acting was great but uh Matt Damon was so good in it I think he like he looked like shit though like I've never I'm like I'm watching him on on the screen and he's obviously aged a little bit I think he's in his 50s now but I'm like we watched the Bourne movies recently so I was I was

looking at Matt Damon and the Bourne movies and now I'm looking at Matt Damon in this and I'm I'm like he it's like he let himself go it's like born it's like Jason Bourne uh you know just stopped fucking caring about his health I don't know but he it was like frumpy just looked kind of dumpy in it but it was so inspiring this is my takeaway I don't want to like give away the movie um just in general like watching movies documentaries tv shows whatever about the greats gets me so fucking hyped and then I just get so inspired and I'm like these people are the best in the world at their thing there's no one better than them like what would that be like and then I get excited I'm like what would that be like and like

what would it take to be like that in whatever thing you're doing like in my case podcasting or golf like it's just so it's so inspiring to watch you're just like they eat sleep breathe think all they do is their thing and it's all they fucking care about and I don't know there's a lot of there's something to be said about that like they're just like cut from a different they have a different mind or something they're just a it's like they're obsessive they're I don't know because yeah you've got your god-given talents and it's like a lot of people have that but it's the people that take those talents and then practice practice practice practice practice perfect perfect perfect perfect practice you

know perfect perfect and they like all they want to do is be great at that thing their talent it's like fuck man i don't know again i'm just inspired and hyped and um i'm just like it made me reflect on myself to be honest like michael jordan wasn't even the best thing they did in that movie and i think it was genius was they didn't they never showed michael jordan they had his character in the scenes like when they're at the when they went to Nike and Beaverton Oregon I think that's where yeah Nike Beaverton Oregon am I getting that right not Eugene Beaverton the family uh James Jordan and Dolores Jordan and Michael traveled to Beaverton to talk with Nike about the shoe deal the Air Jordan deal and like he would be in the room at the table but he would like turn his head

like you never saw his face I just thought that was so it made him seem more more of like a legend or like a mystery or like just bigger it made it made Michael Jordan seem like a god the way they did that I don't know what it was it was so I don't know who came up with that but that was my I was very impressed with that little um yeah artistic thing they did there uh who direct didn't Ben Affleck direct this Ben Affleck as Phil Knight was he was he was all right I don't know if I love Ben Affleck Ben Affleck as an actor um oh fucking Chris Tucker was in this he was great um Chris Tucker who else let me look at the cast list Jason Bateman I forgot to mention Jason Bateman was in this um his demeanor is just like and everything he anything

Jason Bateman accent is like he reminded me in this era movie he reminded me of his character in Ozark like it was like the same thing I'm watching the same guy the same character like that's just his lane like he's good at that like um businessman who's a little bit like short-fused and curt and like I don't know what the I don't know he just has this like way about how he acts it's just great so um go see it if you love Michael Jordan as much as I do or I'm or anyone else like you're gonna love this um what did i not know when i watched this i didn't know his dad got fucking shot i didn't know james jordan got i guess that's a part of michael jordan history i guess i'm fucking missed or i don't know i didn't james jordan death he got shot by

like two 18 year olds it's tragic um james r jordan senior was the father of michael jordan okay um death on july 23rd 1993 it's like a year before i was born while returning home after spending the day off or excuse me excuse me on july 20 i can read okay i know we all know i can read i'm very proud of how i read on my podcast i'm fucking up right now though okay let me drink some coffee i don't know whenever i start flapping like that right before i'm about to read about someone's death it's like i feel that seems very insensitive i need to like i don't know on july 23rd 1993 while returning home after spending the day playing golf jordan pulled over on a u.s highway 74 just south of lumber to north carolina to take a nap daniel andre green

and larry martin de mary spotted the car michael had recently purchased for him a red lexus sc400 with the north carolina license plate blah blah green shot jordan to death while he slept in his car and then stole the vehicle his body was found on august 3rd in a swamp in mccall south carolina carolina and his body as his body is in the state of extreme decomposition that's so horrible um was this someone told me he was shot because by the mafia because michael jordan was like gambling and like doing it with the wrong people or something like that i don't know what the details were why he was shot by them and who these guys even were after going through jordan's belonging screen and then we realized

damiri realized that jordan was the father of michael jordan so they didn't know it was that wasn't like a intentional because like why would they shoot the dad you know oh after their arrest damiri said that they had planned only to tie up their victim and that green pulled the trigger for no reason both were convicted and sentenced to life in prison the accusation was based oh that's interesting just a bunch of fucking idiots a couple of fucking idiots excuse me i didn't mean to shoot him it's just like that's someone's life just boom done dead michael jordan's dad you know it's just life is just so precious and i just get like you know like i have this richard ramirez wikipedia up right now fuck you and this murder

of michael jordan's dad up like i just it's on it's just oh like i i there's so much evil and hate in the world and i just get like fuck you just got to be the light and hopefully that spreads and hopefully gets to all the evil people and they convert into fucking beautiful angels instead of devils who want to kill people like richard ramirez he was a devil worshiper like he just had the wrong cards growing up and he the thing is with serial killers they some a lot of them have like a it's like not like a fetish or something they have like a thing they have to like they can't stop obsessing over it like um Dahmer with um seeing flesh or like eating the flesh or you know what I mean like when he was

chopping up the guys he would murder that documentary holy shit that's kind of how this all started for me honestly the Dahmer series Jeffrey Dahmer series and then I watched like the Gacy one on Netflix the Ted Bundy one um recently I know I talked about the Alex Murdoch murdah trial um brian the brian cover idaho murder thing that's that case or when's that trial coming um idaho murder trial i heard that they're opening up cases in pennsylvania where he's from to see if he's because they have his dna and everything um to like see if he did him like all the unsolved shit brown cobra had id tied to idaho killing sources what's this this came out in april

his id tied to killings what does this mean sorry i'm on it i did not mean to talk about this i do want to talk about the davis versus garcia fight because i know you're on the edge of your seat you can't wait for me to talk about something I really don't know about which is UFC and fucking um is it UFC am I getting that right it's not boxing is it is it boxing am I wrong is it boxing I think it's boxing I did I did I slip up it's boxing right shit I'm nervous I'll get to it is it fucking it's boxing he's a boxer this is an upcoming catchweight professional boxing match contestant bit boxing match okay there we go let me go to this coberger update so university of i don't know if you guys know

about this but back in was it like november 22 four students at university of idaho were slain in their sleep they were um stabbed to death in their sleep and this they they arrested brian coberger and his court or this trial is happening i think in june in a couple months um but here's here's an update i haven't read yet university of idaho murder suspect brian coberger may have held on to an id belonging to one of the four killed in shocking november stabbings sources claim last week coberger 28 same age as me just want to point that out because i love saying my age now was arrested in pennsylvania on december 30th six weeks after kaylee gone gone claves calves i can never say her last name madison mogan zanna kernodle and ethan

chapin were murdered in their off-campus home in moscow i saw this crazy fucking tiktok and you know people are like with ai now like i never know what's real and what's not but this girl like went on google maps or something and literally like zoomed in on something and he was like walking in the street with a black glove and i'm like it just looked too real i was like around the house where the murders happened i was like what the fuck um in addition to dna evidence tying coberger to the grisly scene an unsealed search warrant suggested police found an unspecified ids in the glove box of the doctor doctoral student's car it's a big deal that is a smoking license it's it's a big deal that is a smoking license do you mean like a smoking gun smoking

license retired fbi agent jennifer cough and defer last names are hard as shit like Jennifer Koffendorfer Koffendorfer it's Koffendorfer that's a that's kind of a cool last name yeah but some people's last names I'm like oh my god help me please yeah they need to be like phonetically spelled out or whatever that's called when it's like how it sounds spelled out and not what it and not how it's actually spelled Jennifer Koffendorfer told the network's Chris Cuomo of the possible Cuomo Cuomo Cuomo of the possible discovery which cannot be confirmed due to a gag order on the case just like the knife sheath was a smoking sheath found next to Mogan's body with I think the word smoking next to the object means it's like

the giveaway it's like a smoking gun like a dead giveaway that it's you know what I mean it that it's like the evidence that is like a dead giveaway that that the suspect did it right still learning the right terminology for all the shit uh gag order what is a gag order it sounds like i've heard that before i don't know what it means gag order meaning a judge's order that a case may not be discussed in public oh like like gag like so you can't talk i get it okay um god i don't he fucking pisses me off his fucking face i can't look at it kaufendorfer appeared on the network alongside trial attorney mark la la okay so

he had one of the suspect's ids that is that's crazy um when is the let me look up the date when is this is this is like a is the Idaho murder hearing oh the hearing was on the his next court date is June 26th at 9 a.m. um it's sick that i'm like looking forward to the fucking netflix documentary on this but like i know i'm not the only i mean that is just it's just so fucked up how like real life like these things happen these murders excuse me not these things these tragic murders shootings whatever they happen and then like

within a year or so there's a documentary on it that's just like so well done and so compelling it's so entertaining and I'm like is it fucked up that I like that shit so much I'm like so into it it's like someone died these kids died in the most terrible way like literally like they were yeah I don't know I just but you just know like if I would be so at this point it's like surprising if Netflix doesn't come out with a documentary on these big murder cases like yeah um I think it's because it's so fucking unbelievable that like the way serial killers kill like the way they do it is so unbelievable and so dark and

crazy that it's almost like you can't look away like you're so like you get locked on that's what happens to me I'm like I'm new to that again like I used to live alone for literally my entire 20s until I met Corey I didn't touch the shit I never watched anything scary like I maybe if I was on like a date with a boy and we watched a movie together Netflix and chilled like I you know it's like literally I have to be with a man that I feel safe with for me to like I get so scared so easily so um like i hate horror movies i i watched um nope i think it was called nope on which wasn't even that scary see i think i over i get like in my head that it's gonna be scarier than actually scarier than it actually is but i watched nope on the on a plane ride i

forget when like back from washington court we were watching it together but like that was the last horror movie I watched and yeah I don't know what I'm saying I like I saw the Saw movies one time at basketball camp it was like the most that was like gory though yeah I watched like all of the Saw movies back in high school at basketball camp I just remembered okay um Ryan Garcia versus Gervonta Gervonta Gavonta Davis I'm not a boxing fan I know nothing about anything I don't really follow it I don't like I know who I know the names of different boxers and fighter like UFC fighters like I know but I don't know their records I don't know their history I don't really fucking pay attention all I know is a lot of famous celebrities and influencers I follow

are all about this shit now and it's a wave and it's such it's like great which I think is great i love the the paul brothers popularized boxing and like they made this shit like a exciting or like they made it i think that's great i'm into it now i love watching like i'm going over for it's like the third or fourth time we've gone to this our friend's house to watch the fights it's like a fun thing to do on a saturday so um yeah uh all i know is that ryan garcia is gonna win and the end so but people are saying obviously who's favored let me just read the um oh the prediction odds okay is it I'm I feel stupid is it Gervonta or Gervonta Gervonta Davis

undercard expert pick showtime boxing okay um boxing is a sport that is notorious for being risk adverse averse much to this dismay of fans who clamor for the biggest showdowns possible so fights like saturday's clash between young superstars ryan garcia and gervonta tank davis are i'm just gonna call him davis garcia and davis i don't i keep fucking up his first name i don't i maybe i am maybe i'm not gervonta gervonta is it why have i heard gervonta gervonta have i heard that before gervonta i don't know our rarity but but to both men's credit they're they forced the issue to make the fight happen overcoming significant hurdles involving the politics that normally derail such as okay

um let me tell you so their records are um ryan garcia is former wbc lightweight champion okay oh here we go so they weighed in at ryan garcia weighed in today at 135.5 and g david garbanta davis garbanta davis weighed in at 135 um how did they yeah okay so they're 135 28 no versus 23 you know okay knockouts ko's 19 versus 26 people are saying that davis has fought like harder fighters to fight or better fighters than Ryan Garcia has so they're favoring him to win he's a southpaw so that means he's a lefty I do

know that um he's Davis is 28 Ryan's 24 um their reach 70 inches Ryan is 70 inches Davis is 67 and a half Ryan is 5'10 Davis is 5'5 and a half oof does height I mean I don't know I just know that like weight's a really big deal with fighting um obviously like being the same weight um what are the odds and shit uh trying to learn about this while I'm doing it okay I want to show up tonight at the party i know there's gonna be so many goddamn sweets there every time we show up at this house it's like cupcakes that are from like two hours away at some like famous bakery like crumble cookies costco cookies like a cheese board it's just there's so many goodies there i can't wait um i might say i'm probably gonna say fuck it tonight again and then work it off on the

elliptical or excuse me the stairmaster tomorrow and look insane and just um what did i say in the beginning. I was like, I want it to look like when I'm on the, when I'm doing cardio, I want people to look at me and just assume I have any eating disorder, body dysmorphia. I can say this because I used to have eating disorders and body dysmorphia. I want people to assume I'm working off the pizza I ate from the night before. And I'm like fucking so like nervous. I mean like fat. So I'm trying to go as hard as possible. Like I just want to bring that kind of energy to my cardio sessions, you know? Cause like, what's the point if you're like fit, I consider myself to be a very fit person it's like what's the point if you're that fit to go that hard do you know what

I mean like I do it because like I'm so the truth is like this is the honest truth I'm getting to the I'm so I'm getting my um I'm in such good cardio shape now and like physical shape that like I kind of in order for me to like get to the next level and to keep I have to like go harder every time I have to like really like push myself so then it looks obnoxious obviously because of that so that's my why remember your why what's your why why are you listening right now why do you why are you still here you know are you entertained or having fun is this your comfy podcast do you feel like we're friends do you feel like we're on the phone right now and I'm talking to you and I'm whispering in your ear sweet little things about boxing and Ryan Garcia and his

wingspan um you're so happy right now why are you if you're listening right now you're enjoying this please review the show i've even done i haven't done a single call to action we're like two hours in the episode please hit that subscribe button wherever you're listening right now i'm on apple spotify youtube stitcher breaker google podcast wherever you listen to podcasts please subscribe to the podcast and leave a review uh five star review this biatch on spotify or apple uh real simple just click review rate the show or whatever and then it's five stars boom done enter you don't have to write anything you can if you want you can write a little paragraph about i i commute to work and jacqueline and the jacqueline rose show is i always look forward to new episodes

because it really makes my commute better it makes it easier or i'm when i run on the treadmill it's very uh therapeutic and it makes me feel zen and calm to listen to jacqueline talk instead of doing this fucking run that i don't want to do just shit like that maybe i got you out of a hard time maybe maybe you're maybe I make you laugh maybe make you cry maybe I piss you off maybe I fucking annoy you but you're a hate listener or whatever I hate follow people I don't okay I've admitted to this I literally follow certain people for research purposes and like just just to like see how fucking stupid people can be like and how not stupid but like how um i'll get back to this ryan garcia davis fight thing hold on i literally am so enamored by the

way people post on their stories or like the shit they talk about on their stories or like i i'm like i i guess it's because it's like sick it's like i i don't actually like what they're selling to me it's like i'm not or what they're talking about i don't fucking care i just i'm so I'm like I'm I get so like who the fuck would post this or like why are they continuing to post this it's been six years I've followed them for that long I don't know why but like there's it's just like they're still with the same problems different year you know or whatever I don't follow that many people I wonder if you go on my following list if you could like figure out who I'm talking about I will say this though this is what I was about to literally DM this particular influencer the

other day I'm like look now my revelation with my self uh healing journey or whatever I was on a couple years ago was that by me thinking I had something wrong with me and like me um like like searching constantly and looking and reading and like following um people that talk about mental health all day and like following quotes and shit about like healing your inner child and like fucking the holistic psychology all this shit like by me like consuming that thinking about it reading about it you know talking in my head all day about it I was making I was literally just like affirming that I have problems that I need to heal that I have work to do and my revelation and this is what i was trying to i wanted i was like so fucking close

to dming this individual the other day because i was like i'm done i can't watch you post this shit any longer i'm like it it's like a never-ending thing that's like but you don't realize it's the revelation nothing's fucking wrong with you like you're fine it's so clear as day to me that like in my case the thinking the spiraling all day long the focusing on my problems and what I'm not proud of and my you know the like lack of progress in life or like being down on myself about where I'm at in life or whatever all those things by me just like thinking about that posting about that writing that all day or whatever I was doing at the time I honestly don't remember I do remember like posting on my stories like should I think about

in terms of my mental health and like my you if you follow me for a while like I used to get more deep and shit I like sit at night and like write with like a black screen you know on my story with like white text I'd like write shit um yeah what am I getting to my revelation back to that is like if you you got to go the other way instead of like searching and looking and thinking and and digging for what's wrong and like how to heal and shit be just go all out on go just be as fucking obnoxious as it sounds this worked for me that's why i'm telling you right now what worked for me is being my biggest fan my biggest cheerleader hyping myself up telling myself i'm the shit i'm good at this i'm good at that i focused on like when i'm in front of people

because that's not reality the only reality like this chick i follow it's like her little every here's i'll tell you what she posts it's like every day it's like it's just like a sob story about i was having a bad day today and i realized that i got my period and i should be like i should be gentler on myself because you know like my hormones are different right now than they're normally during the month and so i went on a walk and to clear my head it's just like that fucking shit all day long and i'm like i'm like bitch if you just didn't post this if you didn't think about this if you just like had your period and just like you know drank a coffee and went on a walk without like thinking about what the what's what's it gonna do for my mental health what's you

know if you don't like make every goddamn thing a thing and so goddamn important you it wouldn't you wouldn't feel bad about yourself you wouldn't feel down it's like again you affirm it you make it real and you make it and it's only real for you the thing that I realized is that all that negative shit I was thinking about myself we'll get back to the Ryan Garcia and Davis fight in just a sec all that negative shit I was it was only real for me but when I'm with people when I'm on my podcast I've said this before I feel like I'm repeating myself when I'm hanging out with friends when I'm at you know at the club whatever when I'm at work and I'm talking to people that's who I am like that is and I'm everything's good we're laughing I'm having a

good time I'm nice I'm respectful I'm loving I have all these good qualities and like I'm a good person like there's nothing wrong with me these people aren't looking at me like she's got all fucked up it's only when you're sitting with yourself and you're on your Instagram story you're just like or whatever you're just like ho-hum about who you are it's like you're you're nothing is fucking wrong with you I look at these people especially these influencers that do it and that post this shit all day long and I'm like I know people do struggle with mental health I know people have issues but my advice to them is that they need to fucking stop thinking about it all day long stop buying the books stop listening to podcasts stop following this the accounts

because it'll just make you think this more shit's wrong with you it actually been there that actually is i got problems don't get me wrong i got my own shit that i'm aware i know i have things that i'm not but like i can be i mean if you cross me i'll be a see you see you next tuesday like that like I can go from zero to 100 like that I can verbally destroy people like that only if I'm wrong that's the thing I know I I know I have that ability but it's like when I'm wronged I wish I wasn't that way I wish that I could bite my tongue more in those situations but

I so I that's my shit but I don't sit there and go I'm a terrible person I need to go to therapy why am I like this I need to unpack this is from child it's like that's all fuck it's like no bitch you're normal okay someone did you dirty and you you know you fucking chew them out or whatever okay not ideal okay it's better to be like loving and peaceful okay but it's the whole unpacking and wondering why it's just like it's some people go in too deep and i get exhausted and i probably should unfollow this individual but i'm like like what was it the other day oh yeah I just like oh like it just drives me nuts stop what do people do they like die self-diagnose or it's a new thing now with social media and everyone talking about mental health

like you see someone talk about it so then you think you have it and then you start deep diving into it and then you go and talk to a therapist about it and now it's a thing you're basically creating shit out of that's not there so I always go back to like nothing's wrong with you you're fucking amazing and just tell yourself that like I literally like when I was down and out back to those old YouTube videos of me being like half brunette half blonde needing to get my roots done like 35 pounds heavier than I am now like sitting alone in my apartment are those the blue angels holy shit we got planes flying in formation over the over the ocean right now that's pretty sick that makes you feel really patriotic um uh yeah when I was in that going

through that phase like I just got real psychotic about how much I hyped myself up and like talked positively about myself not psychotic I got like really good at it I focused on the good focus on the fucking good but that's what they they do they'll be like I'm having a bad day but you know what? That's normal. They'll like, what do they always do? They always like justify everything or like explain everything into so much detail is so unnecessary. Just like, wake up. What did I post? I think it was like, what's my biggest, biggest accomplishment in life so far? And I think I was like, um, becoming someone I love and waking up and liking who I am. Like, I actually am proud of this like yeah but I'm lucky I don't think some people like live in

their head all their life their entire life throughout their you know healing years in their 20s and 30s or and beyond and they are just so like just get a fucking backbone and hype yourself up I don't have to say it I just you don't need to go do drugs in the desert you don't need to and like go do ayahuasca you don't need to do any it's just like you're fine no one tells you that though that's a problem with like people like literally make their money off of telling people that something's wrong with them or like um that's what they sell that's that's how you it's not the whole like capitalism thing or like consumerism thing like you're telling people they lack something and they need this thing to make themselves feel more complete or like

whatever it's just like very much you're you're not well you need you're too fat you're too mentally ill you're too this you're too that so you need to take this supplement you need to do this diet you need to go to this therapist you need to it's just like no I say fuck all that you're fine try it just try it it fucking worked for me and I literally do not sit I cannot tell you i don't this maybe i did not i i should mention this maybe i have a new listener you're wondering or maybe you're not wondering but i should disclose that at that rock bottom time back in 2020 i got i did get a therapist okay and i got on an antidepressant i got on medication that i'm still on so that's probably i know that that honestly changed my fucking life okay i'm

very pro um medication I think some people preach like oh just work out and eat healthy okay you don't need meds you know just do a little microdose of mushroom like whatever they like promote like the more holistic approach but for some people including myself that's not an you need sometimes you need medical or you need some like intervention with some meds and in my case I was literally I remember i was i gained 35 pounds in 2020 for in like three months i was literally like working out so hard like always me just always working out way too hard i would do this 45 minute hit workout on a mat in front of my tv in my apartment i would like do a super hard workout i get super sweaty i remember taking selfies and sending it to my family group chat like every day because i was

like so proud of myself i did like 50 burpees in this workout like multiple times and then i did like a bunch of like jumping shit anyways I was trying to do it all I was taking walks I was at least walking or I was walking at least 10,000 steps like walking my dog getting fresh air like you know I wasn't working at the time like I didn't really have a lot of social happening no wonder you get depressed because I think that's a major fucking factor in depression is social and friendship and connection and family and like you need people in your corner and you need community um in my case I didn't have a ton of that at the time so that was probably affecting me um underneath all of the you know I was trying to like work out and eat healthy and do all that

stuff but it just backfired um this is a weird tangent spiral how did I get here oh an influencer I follow that like pissed me off that I wanted to say oh like nothing's wrong with you how did we go from like boxing to this I don't really remember but um yeah in summary what I was trying to say before I went on about a 2020 journey and shit that I've talked about a million times on here sorry if I'm repeating myself um is that like I don't have bad mental health days anymore like ever and it's crazy because I literally went I was like a depressed kind of like teen early 20s like I just always was down down down in my head always just like like I could cry I can't tell you the last time I've been in the dumps and it's like if I'm in

the dumps it's not about myself it's about something else it's weird like I don't just sit and like go like oh my god I'm feeling I don't feel bad about myself anymore I don't feel I don't feel down I don't feel like I'm not good enough I feel like I'm and it's literally like a few things combined obviously like I said therapy medication I am pro I'm into like going to the therapist too I'm not saying that that's negative I don't know if I made that sound like that earlier but you know finding my passion my podcast therapy medication connection community friendship like I got plugged in I you know I was I started I got employed like I was unemployed at the time during 2020 so then you know all these things combined

got me here but um having a revelation literally on my podcast that like thinking is ruining my life overthinking is ruining my life like thinking about myself all day long and like following these fucking accounts about mental health all day long and like watching this kind content all day long is like I just like it like hit me like a bus I wish I could find that episode I always say that I wish I could fucking find that episode because I would look around like people are so happy up you know having a good time they don't fuck they're not in their head all day so how do you get out of your head you stop fucking thinking is how you do it okay stop posting your goddamn story about getting your period and having a bad mental health day I don't

care and I should probably unfollow you but it's not always the period thing what is it there's like I wish I could like think of or just like you just like turn into that you just you end up looking ho-hum you just look dumpy I'm so I'm so mean but literally like people that talk about that shit and that's their personal brand it's like you just look like shit like it yeah so um so i'll wrap up with the garcia fight what are the odds and shit i don't really know how this works fight odd fight card odds odds via caesar sportsbook guessing that's caesar caesar's palace in vegas negative two wait davis negative 240 versus ryan garcia plus 200 don't know what that means negative davis negative 2000 versus fal cow i don't know what this is this

is not i know i i think just from what i've heard and i need to end the episode is davis's favor to win however i'm predicting now that garcia really garcia is gonna win and that's just because i'm a fan and i used to follow his instagram i think i re-followed it i used to watch his um videos of him like punching really fast i was so impressed by that and then i think he lives i think he lives in san diego are you like trains here um yeah i'm looking at my tiktok sometimes i i've been like into playing these if your man plays golf on the weekends watch this what's this video it's not that she doesn't like you to play golf is that you've been working for five or six days and then finally on the day that you have off she wants you oh yeah I remember I watched this

this guy basically says that when you work all week and then you go golfing all day on the weekends your wife misses you so what she's telling you and she's like I don't like when you go golfing is that she misses you and wants to spend more time with you when I was watching this I was like fuck yeah I'm so glad that I love golf as much as Corey does because we can spend that time together and I just know that's like a sore spot in so many relationships I've heard it my whole life like it's always a thing like oh when he goes golfing on the weekends and leaves like it's like what do you do when your man goes golfing all day on a Saturday and there's like TikToks about like you like putting a face mask on popping popcorn kicking your feet up by yourself

having a me day it's like I just like that I don't know we can do it together and uh in golf updates i haven't talked about golf on this episode yet one of my favorite things about michael jordan is he was a golfer is a golfer loves golf um he actually makes golf shoes there's jordan golf shoes which is sick um i was recently buying i went with fucking adidas i just bought a new pair of golf shoes and i went with the adidas because honestly i got them because they looked cute and i don't know um some of the golf shoes out there are so like i know it's like traditional and it's like it's how they are it's like that's a golf shoe they're they look like grandpa shoes and I just need to find one because I want a pair of like grandpa golf shoes with

spikes but I want a really special pair that's like I don't know like I want them to look a certain way and I haven't found them yet and honestly like Corey's a big foot joy guy I tried on pair foot joys I was not impressed I thought these were gonna be like the comfiest shit I've ever put on my feet and like the best golf she'll ever find. Not a fan. I don't know why everyone loves foot joy. My foot wasn't very joyful, but yeah, golf updates on my next lesson tomorrow. Um, I had a really bad range session session the other day. Um, it's crazy. Cause what happens when I golf now and I work out and lift, i feel annoying like i say all these goddamn things and then i go she just loves telling you

she just loves telling me how much she sweats and how hard she works out and how fit she is i'm just telling you what it is this is reality for me like take it however you want it be annoyed if you i don't fucking care but i just i go really fucking hard on my glutes sometimes and this is what happened the other day i've been working on my back more so i'm trying to fix my scaps my wing scapulas and so i've been doing upper body days and i'm also doing my glute days and i went to the range the other day and my um whole body my whole the whole back side of my body was just sore as fuck so what i what i've realized with golf is that cory called me and he's like how's it going like how's your session going I was like terrible and I'm like I just

don't feel like I'm in my body and that's so real so the way I describe it is like when you're sore and you're achy you're trying to swing like I just felt like I wasn't like I wasn't in my body like I was the soreness was kind of like taking away from I don't know it was like adding a layer it's like an extra layer I have to get through an extra like pain I have to get through to swing I don't know it just wasn't great um and I'm also realizing like my technique is improving I'm getting better and better but my clubs are still all fucked up because I didn't get fitted I got like a full set right out of the package that you know one it's a one size fits all thing so I'm really like oh fuck I gotta go get all new clubs and get this shit um fitted for me because it's

kind of like I'm just so inconsistent like I like with my contact my contact inconsistent and Corey's telling me it's because like when I you know hit my nine iron it's not bent right so it's like bent really high so there's a gap between the ground and the the toe so it's like not i don't know i know they're supposed to have a little gap but like mine are like all fucked up also in golf news i saw that live is looking into making a live a women's live golf league or something or they're they talked about that this week so um i don't really have an opinion honestly like i'm not like oh there should just be the pga and only the pga i'm i'm into live i'm into it um so if they do that then hell yeah um i like that the pga is making the the winning

um the money bags the purse the what's it fucking called they're making the winning the winning amount of money you receive what is that called because live is offering these guys so much money pga is now bumping up their purses i guess that's what it's called is that called is it called like a purse what's a term in golf when you have winnings money winnings i'm just gonna type in pga increase prize money prize money the prize money is hot this year players championship will hand out 25 million in earnings a jump of 5 million from 2022 by far the biggest person on

tour players already happened who won the players i forget who won the players i'm still recording i am okay i need to get to the beach players 23 shuffler oh yeah that's the victor hovland i love reading their last names there's just the um um what's it in louisiana what's it fucking called um zurich is there a classic in new orleans who won that um

leaderboard cat lay um it's like a team tournament i don't really remember we watched some some of this this weekend who won i'm just trailing off here i'm literally just googling shit golf channel is it over oh wow I guess Clark and

Hossler is that how you say their name I don't know let me just type in Clark Hossler and maybe they'll come up with an article about them winning clark hostler team keeps slim lead at zurich classic okay cool so that's it um as a reminder this is what i talked about today i recapped la i uh happy earth day i didn't tell you guys what i did on 420 basically Corey and I smoked a joint together and made salmon a salmon Caesar and if you want to watch

me being a goddamn acrobatic uh psychopath go on to my TikTok at Jocelyn Monroe my Instagram at Jocelyn Monroe and you can see the video it's I think it's on my like saved highlights of me doing like because the thing is when I get when I get high and I do anything athletic I get more focused and I have less inhibitions or whatever so like I was just you know cooking dinner fucking around in the kitchen doing cartwheels and shit and like I knew when I did like it went up to the wall and I did a handstand and then I like sat on the wall I do this thing with where I like drop my hips down and I don't know go watch the video but like I knew when I did it I was like I know I'm high and I don't want to fuck this up so like I was overly I which

makes it better because I was like when I pressed on the ground I was really like feeling the ground like really using the right pressure like if that makes sense I don't have I don't know if you have done yoga when you're high or worked out when you're high or done anything like physical when you're high it's just like you're more in tune with what's happening so yeah basically long story short my 420 was very uneventful we literally just the last literally like the last second decided to smoke this joint we've had in this drawer for like literally since I met him that we've never used um we don't I think we've smoked together three times I think that's like randomly one night when I first met him maybe in the first month

and then maybe like I don't even remember the last time and then on 420 so yeah um cool but yeah i talked about okay happy earth day happy 420 um i recapped la i talked about the night stalker documentary on netflix um trump being on nelk the air movie the ryan garcia davis fight two things i forgot to talk about were um domino's coming out with tater tots and I just saw a commercial literally it's gonna be like they make tater tots now with like with the pizza toppings so if you're a domino's fan like me something it's something new on the menu okay something I forgot to mention though is how I like to dress like I like to layer I like to dress in a classy kind of way where I'm like

i'm not showing a lot showing off a lot you know i'm wearing more like flowy long like billowy clothing uh pieces instead of like a crop top in fucking booty shorts okay so i like dressing that way and every time i put on an outfit like that cory walks in the door and instead of telling me like oh hey baby like stunning you look beautiful you look so classy wow oh my god he's like oh look are we going to maryland's middle school uh to the pta meeting i didn't know we were going to the pta meeting he always fucks with me like i look like a pta mom because i look like i'm all like conservative and like classy looking it's just so fucking annoying i'm like i'm like he's obviously joking he thinks i look nice he's not

making fun of how i look he likes my style he likes what i wear but it's just so funny how his like brain it's just such a guy thing like they just want everything showed they want everything to be showed off all the like they just want to see the curvature they just want to see the cleavage they just want to see like because I dress that way like for the most part I'm in sports bras I'm in spandex I'm in tight jeans I'm in tight tops I have my tits out like all it's just like that is 90% of the way I dress. So like every now and then I'm like, look, I'm going to this movie with your parents. All right. I'm dressed in classy. I wore like an all white flowy summery thing. And you know what I mean? I just, anyways. Um, cool. So yeah, I wanted to mention that how

he calls me a PTA mom as a joke. Cause I, but also like, I feel like I'm still going to dress like I'm in my twenties when I'm in my thirties. Like, I don't want to, I don't know. Like, I feel like people, you know what I think the way you dress more quote unquote age appropriate as you get older, I feel like, like as a woman, I feel like you literally like your wardrobe is business business casual attire like you don't have crop tops anymore you don't have like pieces you could find at your forever 21s or your like the trendy pieces that the high school and college girls wear like you don't have any of that anymore it's just like spanks and business casual like um you're you're going to like fucking made well and you're shopping at made

well you're shopping at um j crew like i will never be that bitch i just feel like i gotta keep bit classy right like I want to maintain some sort of like classic style um which is what I always gravitate towards I feel like it looks best on me like whenever I wear some like teeny bopper little girl shit I just feel like I like that for vacation sure like beach days sure but Like, nice dinners, you know, outings, being in public, like, going to a golf tournament or, like, a horse race. I don't know. Like, something nice like that. I'm being more conservative and classy.

That's just me. But I'm actually, this is not the end of the episode. Should I end it? I should. I do have something to say about clothes. it's like really annoying but I want to talk about it okay and then I'm literally gonna end the episode because I really want to go to the beach uh before it gets like colder um or like darker I don't really know when the sun is setting um okay I this is like so annoying but you know

how I moved out of my old apartment back in was it January when I moved in with Corey yeah um and I talked about how my car was like a literal storage unit um it's still a storage unit okay I haven't cleaned it cleaned it out I haven't taken the clothes to the goodwill because I'm too stubborn and I want to consign them but every time I consign them they don't take all the clothes they only take like two or three things so then I have all these nice clothes and I'm like I just I know I should just donate this and just like get rid of it so I don't have to like deal with anymore but I keep sending them back to the consignment store and every now and then they'll like take something new it's just like I have this I don't know if it's an OCD thing or like a

a block in my brain where I'm like I just can't like if I know I can get money for this and if I know this is like good shit that I spent good money on like I just can't just give it away what is that is that like a poor thing is that like a poor way of thinking is that where what does that come from like I don't want to like go into my inner child right now figure out what part of my childhood made me this way but like it's just so annoying like I'm putting my golf clubs in my in the back of my car and I'm like I drive like a SUV by the way if you're like wondering it's not like a car car it's like bigger um and I'm like for the 50th time I'm putting my golf clubs on top of these

garbage bags of clothes that i just need to get rid of but i like still i just keep doing it so like yesterday i was like okay i'm gonna do it i'm gonna clean out the car i'm gonna just i'm gonna literally throw away anything with like a stain or anything that's like kind of shitty i'm gonna throw that stuff away and then i'm gonna keep the nice stuff and then go to the consignment store one more time i was supposed to do this all yesterday didn't happen in the afternoon it didn't happen um i'm gonna go to the consignment store one more time and then after that trip I'm gonna go donate at the Goodwill so all this stuff is gone I literally have in the bedroom right now my entire side of the room is like lined with garbage bags and I went through

them all and then I actually took clothes back that I'm now keeping that I wanted to get rid of that I'm now taking back to keep and I did not complete the project so I just think you know what I'm I'm at I'm at the point now I think I'm just gonna tell Corey I'm gonna say hey look I need your help I've got about 10 garbage bags in my car half of them are in the room right now I just need let's just go to the dumpster right now let's just get right fuck donating fuck donating what am I saying um I feel like bitches around here don't shop at the Goodwill like who's I I do I fucking love thrift shopping but like I should I should donate it's better to donate than throw them throw them in the garbage but I'm at the point I just want it to be out of

say out of mind I just want to ask him like hey let's take 15 minutes get rid of this shit throw it in the dumpster and be done with it so I can like literally vacuum my car out because now it's like the garbage bags are on top of the seats and like is my bathrobe open okay no like I don't know if you're like that I sometimes when that's the chaos of my life like me just not finishing a job just me like being stubborn about donating clothes and shit and like cleaning my closet out it's like a it's like a never-ending thing it's and then I'm just like well it's in my car I barely drive my car I work from home it's just like who cares like I just it doesn't need to happen right now yeah so that's my life story that's the end of the podcast um I wish I powdered

my face halfway through am i shiny i've literally had this makeup brush go on youtube or spotify to watch i've literally had this since sixth grade and my aunt gave it to me from this like mineral makeup line called called young blood that i think she got from like the grocery store in a in this like western town she used to live like i don't even know where it's from it's just like super old and i've literally had i remember doing my makeup for the first time in middle school with this so that's crazy um okay that's the end of the podcast I love you thanks for being here again please hit that subscribe button review the show and I'll ask because now it's the end of the episode and I forgot to do this in the beginning if you want to support the show

head over to patreon.com slash tjms uh it's five dollars a month patreon.com patreon i'm like hitting a wall patreon.com slash slash slash tjms is my subscription service donation service my tip jar my way for you to support the show check it out patreon.com love you thanks for being here and i'll talk to you next week play oh yeah i rap with a certainty i have a sense of urgency a message for eternity for everyone internally i had some people burning me but now they fucking learn to see i ain't the one to fuck with now they looking nervously and i don't really care what you think of me respectfully you can kick rocks if you think you're fucking better