The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 340- I Dripped Out That Dirty Blonde

Episode Date: May 11, 2023

Today I talk about Warriors vs. Lakers, finally becoming a Steph Curry Superfan, Jamie Foxx in the hospital weeks after exposing P Diddy and his 'gay' parties, Ben Affleck going viral for 'slamming' car door on Jennifer Lopez while out in LA, dating advice for single millennials, eating at a new steakhouse and having the best scallops ever, Cinco De Mayo at the Padres Game, the first time I blacked out in college, my upcoming 1 year anniversary, unintentionally doing the carnivore diet, and MORE!! Thanks for listening, ILSM!! :) BECOME A PATRON! https://www.patreon.com/tjms KEEP IN TOUCH! INSTAGRAM » https://www.instagram.com/jacquelinemonroe/  TIKTOK » jacqueline.monroe EMAIL THE SHOW! [e-mail] MY MUSIC GUY: https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic SPONSORS Spotify for Podcasters

What's up, guys? It's episode 340. Welcome back to the show. Hey, what's up? It's Jacqueline. Welcome back to the show. all right two things one this is gonna be an audio only episode okay uh just for today just because I'm cranking it out and I need I have shit to do what's new um shit to do need to get a podcast out cutting corners not doing video okay that's what's happening so uh yeah two so I got a sweet text from my brother um about the podcast and he told me that he loves when I talk about current events and news and the different exciting things going on in the world and um yeah so that was great feedback and in honor of that text in honor of his message

I'm gonna be talking about myself today instead I'm not gonna be talking about current events I literally sorry Rob like I think I have two things I wrote down two tiny pieces of news but um yeah to be honest this is like a hi I'm checking in this is what I've been up to bye and then I'll talk about like literally yeah I have one or no two current events I need to put the second one down there um yeah so let's get into it first I'm going to set the scene like I always do um and tell you what i what i've been up to today um drinking black coffee and water all right black coffee and water is are the beverages i had a protein bar it's called bar it's a barbells protein bar now these things are straight up like i'm eating a snickers like i've

had a lot of protein bars in my life and i think this is the best this is the most like it's a candy bar protein bar it's a can't what am I saying Jimmy's coming over to me right now because he has a rapper fetish literally my golden retriever has all he he has so many quirks he's first of all he's scared of everything like the littlest thing will make him run and hide in the closet like I'll drop a pencil and he'll run for his life okay he's full of quirks and the weirdest one is his wrapper fetish and his crinkly like like paper fetish where it reminds me of my oh my god okay tongue tied at the in the first five minutes already all right he reminds me of a cat because I used to have a cat that liked to crinkle him or like lay on

crinkly paper because I think he liked the sound of it anyways Jimmy likes to take my protein bar wrappers every time I open one he runs over to me and I got lucky with him because he doesn't swallow anything he's not a he doesn't swallow he's a he's a spitter okay he keeps everything outside of his mouth which is great because I'm never I never worry that he's going to choke on something and like for for instance socks like most people I've talked to with dogs have a horrible time uh like keeping socks out of their mouths because they want to like and they eat them my brother's dog i think eats the socks whole um but jimmy just nibbles he just nibbles and then like spits it out so with the wrappers so the bar i mean i mean a protein bar i'm trying to set the

scene i'm eating this protein bar and what he does is he comes over and i'll just give it to him now fuck only you'll hear it in the background though he takes the wrapper and he'll quickly run away with it and like hide in a corner somewhere. And he'll slowly just like shove his nose as hard as possible on it. And like, he doesn't rip it apart. He just like makes the noise over the crinkle noise over and over. It's so cute, but like so stupid. And yeah, so he just came over here. He wants it, but I'm not going to give it to him. Um, black coffee, water, protein bar. I sat in the sauna this morning. I'm nursing a hamstring injury. I didn't work out. Um, yeah, I really fucked myself when I went on Instagram the other week because I saw I was my algorithm is feeding

me fat asses and fat asses only all right I fucked myself because I looked at one chick literally I was on my for you page or whatever on my Instagram the discover page I saw one chick with a nice ass and bikini and I was like then I started stalking her page and then next thing I know those those kept trickling in my algorithm started feeding me more and more and you guys all know that I've been on a cardio journey. I've been trying to work on my lungs and get my endurance up because I'm a former vapor as of I quit, I think November. No, before that I vaped from like all of 2022 till November. Um, basically all of 2022. So I was in the early months this year. I w I was working on my cardio, really trying to get my lungs in shape again. And I

achieve that goal I'm a runner now I'm a cardio bunny I can do sprints I can do intervals like nothing and I feel like I'm back to my normal like cardio shape so anyways I've been working on that and but now I'm like shit I was doing glute workouts like consistently like sometimes five days a week I know that's extreme but I was doing that for so long and I you know my my ass got real fat and now I'm like it's kind of not as voluptuous as it used to be why am I drawing attention to my why am I doing this right now on my podcast is this pick me in or is this being a pick me girl just nonchalantly talking about my body publicly on my podcast just like it's just I'm just talking about fitness it's not just it's not that serious um subscribe to my only fans literally we'll talk

about maybe I should talk about only only fans on this episode um anyways so i what the fuck i was saying so yeah i and over the last two weeks i i've been hitting the glutes hard again and i forgot that i pulled something in my leg i talked about that on the last episode i kind of forgot i i hurt my upper hamstring a few weeks back and so when i've been lifting i something strained and i hurt it really bad and yesterday i was like it was tender to the touch okay I haven't had a hamstring injury this bad in a while and to be honest I think it's because I did RDLs for the first time in two months and I'm like feeling it so yeah that's what I did this morning I now I'm podcasting I'm house sitting this weekend with Corey at his parents

place so we're gonna take the dogs there I have to pack a bag in a bit I have to head out the door I have to you know pack the kids food and put them in the car and yeah it's gonna be fun um I think we're gonna grill this weekend because the weather's nice finally here in California so that's kind of the vibes the okay um but as far as like what I've been up to what I've been doing um I guess I'll just rewind you back I went through my camera roll and I wrote down like notes of all the shit I've been doing Jimmy sorry um I don't know like it's been two weeks since I talked to you maybe less than that it just feels like I'm due for a pod I'm way overdue for a podcast um yeah I went to

uh it's called the Fairmont Grand here in California in California I mean be more specific the Fairmont Grand here in Del Mar in San Diego and we met up with Corey's friends and we it was like 10 a.m we had margaritas by the pool and played with our kids and hung out and then after that like literally I'm just gonna go through my itinerary like what what I did so should I talk about that experience specifically or like give you more details I had a regular margarita down with spicy margarita um I'm still in my in my drinking phase era I'll talk about that in a bit um I talked about that on the last episode so like I'll just keep keep the story uh I'll continue the story on this one um yeah like me drinking a margarita at 10 a.m is unheard of

but we're all there together meet new people we're gonna have them by the pool it's like a vibe we're a nice place okay cool um after that we got lunch at this pizza place and we watched the Golden State Sacramento Kings game I believe it was and let me just tell you this okay so I'm a basketball fan all right but outside of college ball like I don't really pay attention to the NBA honestly like when I was younger and I used to watch it all the time I used to follow it right but now I'm like whatever so I've heard about Golden State I've heard Steph Curry's name I used I used to follow his wife on Instagram like I'm familiar but I didn't understand I've never watched him play like I've never like actually sat through a game watch and play so because of

that game I was like I'm a Steph Curry fan now like super fan he's incredible he's amazing he's got like four championships right four or five this will be his fifth one if they win this year I think so yeah now I'm rooting for Golden State and lately we've been watching the Lakers and the yeah Golden State games I think they're on game six next in LA I believe and I'm into it so like that's been the latest thing for me and Corey like we're watching the NBA finals right that's what it's called the NBA finals um and we're rooting for Golden State uh yeah like I just it's annoying because like I like the Lakers I hate LeBron so what I just can't root for the Lakers I just and honestly like I don't want to talk shit on LeBron right now but like

he's great right but sometimes when I watch his he is like lazy ass fundamentals sometimes where i'm like oh my god like if you just put in 0.2 more effort into that pass like and just did it did it fundamentally correctly instead of like hooking it around like he like sometimes i'll just watch him he'll just like sling the ball to his teammate and it just like doesn't show up in the right spot i'm like if you just took two hands and passed it normally it would you know what i mean i just feel like he's like turnover king um like it does like he makes a lot of like maybe I'm just talking shit because I don't like LeBron it's his personality okay I just lately I'm like when I was younger when I was in like high school I loved LeBron I was like but then once he got

on Instagram social media and I started following his shit and seeing when he was talking about things he's I'm just like I can't so um anyways like he's not a goat for me he's not the greatest of all time for me just saying it goes in my in order of greatness to it goes Michael Magic Johnson I'm gonna say Kobe and then I'll put LeBron after Kobe but Kobe's ahead of LeBron for me I don't know what your order is but that's my order okay cool um so anyways we're watching basketball right now happy spring we're watching the nba playoffs playoffs what is it called like is it the finals is it the championships i swear it's like the nba nba playoffs yeah that's like the nfl

playoffs before the nba finals which is like oh the finals are june 1st to sunday june 18 oh my god this is kind of a long series of games i didn't really like tournaments or whatever like i didn't really understand i i guess it's like jack and common sense but i i haven't followed the nba in a while uh we got celtic 76ers today um sixers call them sixers or 76ers i call them i guess sixers all right whatever so we're watching we're watching basketball i'm a steph curry fan and i just like his ball handling like holy shit he just makes it he is so unstoppable unstoppable with the ball handling um and just driving to the hoop like i don't know it's it's fun to watch um

we went to a new restaurant here um one of cory's friends opened a new steakhouse we checked that out last week and it was incredible like it was i think we went on like a wednesday night um so we did that what did we order do you want to know um so we got scallops I got the scallops which were the best scallops I've ever had in my life and I think it's because scallops have a sweetness to them kind of like lobster and whatever they whatever puree was underneath it complemented the scallops so well like thinking about it right now like I remember the taste they had these little like tiny mushrooms what are those called chanterelle mushrooms chanterelle is that how you say it chanterelle mushrooms no I don't think it's that they're like tiny no they're not chanterelle

tiny mushrooms um chiodoni beach mushrooms chiodoni chiodoni white button no anyways it had like a puree mushrooms like this little green sauce and the puree I think was like parsnip or something it was so good together is my point it was just like so good and do you guys like when I talk about food on here I'm just going to continue so then we got a filet cooked medium um and what's it called braised no what's it called when it's like a braised piece of beef isn't it like what the fuck pot roast do we get no it's not like pot roast but it's like um braised meat why am i blinking right now what is that what is meat short ribs oh we got the short ribs that's what we got

got short ribs a filet and scallops and then like a side of mushrooms a couple salads and then we skipped dessert and went to our favorite froyo place after so and got the best our our uh the cab we got the wine was so good i can't remember the name but it's not like it takes a lot for me to gasp when i take the first sip of wine you know like it it takes because like for the most part wine like cabs kind of all have the same flavor profile you know what i mean it's all like kind of the same every now and then you'll take a sip of wine and you're like holy shit and then and that was this wine and i can't fucking remember i wish i took a picture of the bottle um yeah so we went to a new restaurant all right moving down the list who's having fun are you

having fun if you're having fun please review my show okay go over to the spot spotify or apple podcast app and review the show five stars right now uh just fucking do it okay it helps me out it helps other people find out about the show it's just overall it's good for human humanity it's just it's women supporting women it's men supporting women it's people supporting people um you know like you might have a buddy who's got like a small business and you've probably yelp reviewed him or like google you know like you've probably helped him out like that's the same shit like just do it for me okay it's like how can you as a listener right now be like what is the most important thing you can do as a listener right now and as a subscriber to my

podcast the number one most important thing you could do is review my show like you're probably already subscribed but the review is so helpful so just for me and the growth of this podcast so review the show right now go over to the apple or spotify app wherever you're listening and five-star review it thank you um you know what goes around comes around it's gonna come back to you and and this five-star review is gonna give you a five-star life okay that's my that's my guarantee all right so next up uh we went to the padres game on Cinco de Mayo and this is where I'm gonna uh fucking expose myself uh so

we have we have we have a friend who's got like box seats or whatever it's called they're like it's like you go to a like when I went to baseball games growing up I didn't really go to any I think I'd go with like my school or no not my school like a field trip no not a field trip over to be like my friend's dad would have tickets or I don't even know like we would go as a family but we just get like regular regular ass seats but as I've gotten older it's like no you're in the front row like you're literally on the sidelines of shit um my mom's boyfriend has I think two different sections one of them's front row so we go to those games in Seattle and then the other one's like I think up higher but also front row it's like on the second level front row so like spoiled as

fuck now and with the seating arrangements and then um i've also been like all the game like professional sports games i've been to it's like i'm walking in a room with catering and fucking like big tvs and cocktails like free everything and they're like the best seats in the house like so this is one of those experiences so we're you know we show up we eat some sushi we have some cut water lime margaritas and i'm trying to think did i have drinks before we went out did i eat anything the problem is i didn't eat okay i had literally okay let me just cut to the chase so that was friday night let me just cut to the chase i woke up this hasn't happened since let's put this back

to 2014-15 okay 2000 so how many years is that like eight years ago it's been about eight years since this since this has happened to me no bullshit I'm being honest like authenticity is my middle name here on my show okay cool I don't need to oversell now it sounds like I'm lying to you and this happens every weekend okay so we went to the game friday night on saturday morning my eyes open okay just remember i went to the padres game on friday night on saturday morning my eyes open and the first thing i noticed was the stiff black

pause the first thing I felt on my body was this the stiff black denim jacket I wore the night before fitting so tightly on my body and I was in the most like it was like a straight jacket the first thing I noticed I opened my eyes and I notice this black stiff jean jacket still on my body from the night before I look out I'm on my side I'm on my left side I'm in my bed and I notice a nice glass of water next to the bed and like a LaCroix and yeah I woke up in my bed fully closed and then with water next to me and then I go okay what's that smell proceed to rise and I notice a half-ass half-assly cleaned okay i noticed sorry i'm like talking so slow i'm trying to paint a picture

i i rise i sit up i notice a really awful smell and i look on my pillow and there's some crusty shit okay that was clearly like cleaned but not perfectly cleaned uh like it wasn't fully wiped off it was still kind of the remnants of whatever that substance was was still there and it was dried and crusty and it stink um then I touched my hair it's in my hair as well so if you're following along you might be wondering Jacqueline what what happened or you might know what happened you might have been you might have been here before you might have experienced this as well uh once or twice in your life maybe many times but for me this was the second time this has happened I all I remember is this we show up at the Padres

game I start talking to a woman named I think it was like Susie or something I'll just make it up Susie and she's like 30 years older than me we're having the best conversation I'm drinking a cut water lime margarita and Corey comes over and pops a piece of chicken in my mouth that was at the buffet next thing I know okay we're talking I'm talking to Susie drinking the margarita somehow he offers me another one and then sushi I have literally two bites of sushi I hadn't eaten since 10 that morning when I reversed time and I thought back to like when I hadn't eaten last it was 10 a.m that morning so a couple bites of sushi a piece of chicken and the rest is history literally history I'll never know never be aware of history that only will only be

remembered by those who were there who were not uh five margaritas deep by the fifth inning or whatever the I don't even know where I was at at that point um history that will only be able or will only be uh remembered by me looking at my camera roll okay that's another thing that happens so after I sit up and I realize I'm in my clothes from the night before I you know I'm obviously immediately getting on my phone because it's the morning what do you do when you wake up immediately get on social media okay get on your phone um if you're a hot piece of millennial trash social media addict trash like myself you wake up and immediately get on your phone I at this point in my life I think I've talked about before

I just don't get fired up about like going on a social media detox like it doesn't get me like wouldn't it be nice if I just like wasn't on my phone and I just meditated and like I just because I used to go through phases this is a side tangent I used to go through phases where I'd be like okay this week no phone in the morning I'm just gonna wake up brush my teeth go to the gym like then I'll check my phone once I'm at the you know I delay it so I'd like have a little goal and I would feel good about that goal I'd be like I'm not gonna be on my phone as much where I'm literally at the point it's 2023 we're about six months deep where's the time fucking gone um we're in five months deep it's May and I don't I don't want to be like negative like or we're too far

along because that's when things when you that that's like giving up but I don't I'm like I don't think my life is I don't think my life sucks period so like me doing these extra things for like my health or mental health it's like I'm not what's it for I'm fine you know what I mean like I don't okay waking up and not being on my phone might give me five minutes back but like it's kind of fun to check her for five minutes before you go brush your teeth you know what I'm saying like I'm not gonna but like it's not for me it's just not exciting so I don't I don't um I just fall prey to my bad habits every day and i just like accept that's just my life that's how that's my habit my habit why does it have to be bad checking your phone in the morning great get a little

serotonin boost oxytocin whatever the fuck the social media gives you you see a little inspo you see a little ass inspo before the gym on your discover page on instagram you know it's all good i think it's a net benefit to check your phone in the morning than the negative thing and i don't know I'm just fucking off I mean obviously it's research has shown otherwise but anyways back to the Padres game back to waking up in my stiff black jacket I I got on my phone and I was looking through the camera roll from that night and I was like there was there was like okay let me just go on it right now let me go back to the game literally okay okay guys just uh obviously I blacked out is that we call it blackout yeah literally hasn't happened since 2015 like college

one for the and I'll tell you that my first blackout story why don't I do that today I'll tell you my first blackout story in college my first and last after I tell you this story so I blacked out obviously um I go on my camera roll and I remember okay I'm taking a selfie first of all I took pictures of my outfit my black outfit I took selfies in the uber and then I took selfies or then I took selfies with Corey at the games pictures of our sushi pictures of my feet okay then it starts getting weird now I'm in the bathroom taking mirror selfies all of them are blurry I look good but they're like a little blurry uh I do not remember that I'm holding a cut water lime margarita in my hand so I'm still drinking that point clearly um there's

videos of me putting the margarita in my tits like in my tank top okay there's just random videos of cory i guess i was taking then what's weird the weirdest shit for me is like 25 pictures of me posing in front of the game like clearly i stood up and i had someone i think cory take my picture just like hi i want a nice picture of myself at the padres game okay so that's weird i don't remember that at all one bit not zip zilch none so weird that I'm literally smiling looking at the camera clearly having a good time probably was I was probably talking I don't know what the fuck I said and then the next part is nice pictures of me and Corey posed together and then the weirdest fucking video and this is the

part where I had I think when you black out you can sometimes remember like a split second of something then I have this video of it's a 13 second video of me my camera my cameras in the bathroom hanging on my bag in the stall probably I probably like positioned it I don't even know if I meant to turn it on but it's just a 13 second shaky video of the bathroom stall and I remember the only thing I remember is going into the men's bathroom I don't know why I went in there with Corey after we like when we left I just remember men's bathroom and walking in and looking at a sink that's it and so I'm assuming that's when I took this video and he I think he said yeah Jacqueline you were in there for like 25 minutes I had to yell for you to come out

um so yeah um the next day pictures are hilarious I'm in my Willy Wonka white and black sunglasses in my frumpy fucking sweatsuit um just taking mirror selfies again still taking selfies but now I'm hungover these are my hangover hangover selfies next picture is like a giant bacon egg and cheese bagel and coffee um a cut on my leg who the fuck knows where I got that and then we go golfing so it was a great see that's the thing when I drink now and I go out and shit like that happens I bounce back bitch like I when I was younger I was telling Corey this I was like when I drink and I again second blackout of my life happened at that game and I think again it's because I didn't eat like literally I had what did I have that morning like I don't know fucking

eggs or something and then I had a bite of chicken and two pieces of sushi and like five margaritas so anyways typically or like back in the day if i went out for drinks with my friends and we were out to like two or three in the morning whatever i would the next day categorize that day as a like a wash like a bed day like a lazy i'm hungover i feel like shit day where now i don't go that hard regularly anymore um but when i do here and there the next day I'm like up getting coffee maybe we'll go to the sauna well we usually don't work out after that we'll like sauna and just like move our bodies go on a walk to the beach or something and then I'm like up I'm active then we'll go golf we usually golf on hangover days

which is fun um actually do really well when I'm hungover somehow and yeah like I I just I don't feel like shit anymore and I don't know if it's because these new vitamins I'm taking did I tell you guys my new vitamin routine because I'm putting together a cocktail a concoction here that um I think I think it's gonna it's I think it's working for me and I think this is contributing to my like overall energy recovery just mental health I mean I wish I think what I'm gonna do is give this another round or like another few months and then I'll check back in because I always have them in front of me because I'm like so excited about these new supplements and I think I'm going to check back in and explain kind of like what I'm taking why I'm

taking it and how it's working because I already feel great like from what has it been like two weeks of this shit so there's like multiple things I'm combining um not administered by a doctor just by my own I did my own research and I you know I read a lot of reviews I'm hoping for the best so yeah that's it I so we went to the Padres so we checked out a new restaurant we got I were watching the NBA um we went to a Padres game I had a black oh let me tell you in college the first time I blacked out so me my two best friends in college go out to a football game and after the game we stay out all night and drink and we're at all the bars and shit and we're drinking vodka crayons over and over like that was my drink in college vodka cranberry double vodka crayon like

that was vodka cran I don't know the last time I've had I don't fucking drink vodka anymore first fall I'm a like like here and there sure if it's like a fancy mixed drink and it has like nice fruits in it and shit but for the most part I'm tequila and tequila only um reposado to sip blanco to shoot and blanco to mix and shit so um Jesus Christ lately it's like I'm doing a lot of so I quit my this is this is my podcast is the character arc or whatever the journey so I was like I was addicted to vaping in 2022 and I quit and started doing but like I've always been healthy diet and exercise wise just no underneath all of this just understand that that is my like bread and butter okay I'm I never miss a workout

I'm there like fucking six to seven days a week on average like I'm a workout whore and a healthy eating whore for the most part some days are better than others and I don't know why I'm saying whore is that degrading myself fuck it who cares it's just it's just a word it's just like a it's putting emphasis on the fact that I'm I'm a fit bitch okay so underneath all of these addictions and substance abuse issues making myself sound like a fucking drug addict I keep it I keep it tight and right and I care about my health so last year was like hey she's she's a vape queen she's in the closet about it no one really knows but she's doing it and then she quits okay she's like this is terrible for my lungs and this is not cute so I quit my vape

2023 rolls around oh okay I'm gonna do cardio and I'm gonna work on my lungs because my because vaping hurt my lungs and I want to have better endurance okay so now I'm cardio bunny also during that time I was doing edibles for a month straight because and I told that story in the last episode now I'm on a little weed kick a little edible kick then the sun fucking comes out for the first time in six months here in Southern California. It's been raining. It's been cloudy. It's been dark. And what does Jacqueline want to do? What is Jacqueline talking about lately? Drinking alcohol, bitch. Drinking alcohol in the sunshine because it's nice out and nothing's better than sunshine and goddamn cocktail by the beach. All right. So that's the character arc. That's the character.

That's a hero's journey. We're replacing, we're changing up one substance for the next one to the next one. What's it going to be next? Probably meth. Who the fuck knows? Kidding. But like it's just wild how like it's always something with me you know what I mean I feel like I'm pretty balanced I'm pretty normal and back to what I said earlier it's kind of annoying but I'll repeat it again I love my life I have no complaints I'm doing well everything's good I'm healthy I'm happy like I don't I'm not turning to things to feel better it's not one of those situations thank god because I know so many people lean on drugs and alcohol for uh support like that but um it's just like I just like to fucking vibe sometimes and have

have a goddamn cocktail and the only thing I'm pissed about at the Padres game is I literally watched they won that game and they I literally watched like maybe one inning in total and yeah so back in college we go out for drinks until like two in the morning whatever and after the football game and that's when I had my own one bedroom apartment um it was really cute had like a wood ceiling I was like older like 70s vibes and I had decorated really cool and this is the blackout story so excuse me why am I talking that's just it makes me feel like dirty when I'm talking about this shit like Jacqueline be a class act be classy you're better than this don't be don't be trash i think trash stories and experience life experiences like this are like

it's more relatable than fucking telling you how squeaky clean i am because you know well again for the most part i am but here and there i dabble um oh if he wanted to he would honey if he wanted to he would just know that if your man isn't giving new texts throughout the day with lots of love and and and good words sorry I just got a text from Corey that's really sweet right now um it just makes my day so anyways my friends and I are walking home from the bars at like 2 30 in the morning and I remember we're always walking home in the cold it's winter time in eastern Washington at Washington State University after a football game it's fucking cold I'm probably dressed in like I don't know like

probably some version of a crop top and jeans okay with heels or like booties and the long story short okay is that was the first time I blacked out ever and I've heard about blacking out I knew that the sororities and fraternities at my college were like the mecca for like getting that turn and what am I saying they were like that's what you did it was like that was the point of drinking in college like for so many people around me it was like let's black we're blacking out tonight it was like I don't know why like people want to black out like I don't understand it like it's just like I don't know I would always hear people like talk about it like that like it's just so like that's the point like we're gonna black out yeah um anyways we're

walking home to my apartment we're halfway down i wish i remember the street let's just call it like a street i actually think i used to live on a street not it wasn't where i lived but it was a b street a street b street was one of those streets next to the stadium and i just the only the last thing i remember is walking down that street then i woke up the next day to a pristinely cleaned apartment okay my place was pristine I couldn't figure out why my two best friends were crashed on the couch and I was like what the fuck like how why are you guys still here like I didn't know what happened I clearly blacked out so they told me Jacqueline we came home from the bars after the football game you made homemade marinara from scratch cooked us a pasta fucking

dinner and like made us a full course meal fed us and then cleaned your apartment and then went to bad and yes I'm tooting my own horn because that was the coolest shit I've ever heard in my life like I'm a productive drunk like I'm a productive like it's hard to explain like I think what happens is my brain gets dialed in somehow like I know it makes you stupider but also like I get more focused in a weird way apparently and I guess yeah I made and I remember the recipe just because I used to make that all the time so when I was blacked out I still remembered and that's also back when I was vegan oh my god I just had a flashback to that just eating a lot of like pasta and potatoes and like just bland fucking boring food and no meat all the time and

oatmeal and shit okay let's move on so um Corey and I are celebrating our anniversary next week we're going to a a getaway a weekend getaway just know that and I am so stoked about my gifts I'm going all out okay I am it's not like I'm it's not like a birthday but like a first year anniversary is kind of a big deal and I got a lot of sentimental shit coming his way and I can't wait for it so it's so crazy we were like we've been like really all about our anniversary over the last like week or so because it's like literally next Wednesday and I'm like I'm like how the fuck like I'm like mind fucked how we're together and like we live together and we it's been a year like what the it's just so crazy and it's like hitting me all at once I

don't know so that's what's coming up as far as like travel and shit um so random but I wrote red meat just red meat on my list here so you know how like the carnivore diet is a thing you know how people talk about like the benefits of liver and red meat and how our body like responds so well to it and it's full of so many vitamins and minerals and nutrients whatever like red meat is like being pushed right now there's like a whole side of it's like the carnivore what's i love his instagram carnivore arulius it's like a meme page for carnivore people um anyways sorry i'm getting a text uh fucking i let me collect my thoughts so the red meat why did i write that down i went to trader joe's and i stocked up on a bunch of groceries last week and

it's weird like cory and i are a ground turkey household i talk about all the time like we eat ground turkey like it's fucking cereal ground turkey salmon chicken is kind of that's kind of our and then tons of sushi um shrimp like we kind of like very little red meat which is weird because i fucking love red meat right and like we'll go to a steakhouse we'll have red meat when we're at like a taco shop getting carne asada tacos or something but we don't really buy it to excuse me to eat at the house and so i'm a trader joe's and i see this this shaved grass fed i don't know what the fuck it was I don't think it was grass-fed I see the shaved the shaved beef container I'm like fuck that fuck yeah I'm gonna get why is my inflection getting all weird I'm like I'm like

damn I'm gonna season this up this is gonna be some good like carne asada meat we'll have this for dinner one of these nights so anyways I'm hungry as fuck midday I don't know like a few days ago and you know, I'm working, it's lunchtime. I'm like, what should I cook? So I take that fucking package of shaved beef out of the fridge and I put it in my, I put it in it, put it in a pan, lightly seasoned with salt and pepper and some garlic powder. And I think a couple of other things maybe some cumin I don't know and I ate the entire fucking package over the I think so I had like because I was like I'm just gonna have this meat I'm gonna try this carnivore diet thing now this was like a package I probably it probably now I eat a high high protein diet just just know

that uh so it's not a lot like eating a lot of meat for me isn't really like it was probably like three times as much as I should have had but I don't know whatever so I literally I had it I was like oh my god this is so fucking good I feel so amazing oh my maybe it was just like because I know red meat's like I I hear about all the benefits of red meat through social media so I'm like and like steak because this that's what it was it was like shaved beef steak I don't know so I'm eating it I'm like oh my god I feel so nourished I feel so healthy if this is tastes so good oh my god I'm like this is what my body needs I need these I need iron right now or whatever fucking red meat has I was like oh yes I'm nourishing I need this I don't eat enough

red meat I need more of this in my diet this is good for me next thing I know the whole fucking pan's gone and I ate the whole goddamn thing of beef so I don't know if I'm gonna be a beef bitch now instead of a ground turkey bitch I'll probably be it all I'll probably do it all but sometimes like that's what so when we were at the steakhouse eating that filet I go I could eat a filet every fucking day of my life and it's my favorite cut of meat filet mignon this is it bitch like i love it i not to sound like i feel like i sound like one of those like what like remy warren isn't he like the hunting dude or like rogan and like you know his hunting bros that he talked like always talked about like elk and shit and like hunting and like red meat

and like but like I kind of get it like I fucking feel great when I eat red meat and it tastes fucking amazing and I literally had not I didn't put sriracha on it I just had it plain like with seasoning it was so fucking good and maybe it's because I don't have it very often but oh what if I do the carnivore diet guys like a really gnarly summer diet holy shit didn't rogan say shit he shot black shit he was shitting black or something when he did the carnivore diet um anyways so i'm gonna kind of like keep this short and sweet jamie foxx is in the hospital this is the current event i want to talk about so yeah jamie fox had a medical emergency this is like a week ago health updates everything we know

um and i was on tiktok and people are saying it's because p diddy tried to kill him diddy and then people then then i was like on a wrap in a rabbit hole about like diddy being like a bad guy and being into like i don't know young boys and shit i don't really know that I wasn't nothing's like it's all shit I saw on TikTok so who knows but I guess he's in the hospital and this headline from Yahoo's like following medical emergency Jamie Foxx's friends and family are reportedly preparing for the worst so what exactly happened this is what I'm trying to get to I don't know what the medical emergency is I don't think there's disclosing very much they're not giving specifics but I think the reason why I guess

this was in atlanta when he was filming the upcoming film he's in it's called back in action i think cameron diaz is in that too and i guess what he told the cops someone tried to kill him not someone apparently is diddy and i just don't really know if that's true or not but that's what's been circling okay um corina reports jamie fox's friends and family are preparing for the worst following his medical emergency last month while in atlanta filling filming for upcoming film back in action with co-star cameron diaz the beloved actor suffered a medical complication offset fox's family has not shared exactly what happened to the actor but has been offering updates indicating his condition is improving despite the word of his conditioning improving jamie

fox's condition remains an alarming concern as doctors continue to monitor the actor the lack of information and general updates has led many to theorize about fox's condition one report said that fox's condition was dire we entered the hospital on april 12th and noted and unnamed sourcing but he wouldn't be in the hospital this long if he was anything close to okay his friends and family are hoping for the best preparing why do i read so fast because i'm good at reading okay cool um i'm just gonna type in jamie fox p diddy or diddy reddit wait this is a top youtube video ti confronts diddy for melting jamie foxx's brain with lithium what yeah diddy was allegedly confronted wait

oh okay because didn't jamie fox expose him expose diddy about having like gay parties and shit is that what the whole thing was i think there was like a i don't know like an interview or him saying some shit yeah jamie foxx opens up about his experience at diddy's party let me read this yeah so there's this video here sorry i just like watched a little bit of it um yeah so apparently some weird shit happens at Diddy's party parties I don't really know guys honestly I just hope he's okay I'm just like what the fuck you know um lithium though

like wait P Diddy Jamie Foxx 50 Cent reveals how Diddy is behind Jamie Foxx's collapse six days ago Diddy was allegedly okay I don't know I don't know what you've heard I don't know if you've even heard about this just know that Jamie Foxx is in the hospital and shit happened on the 12th of April in Atlanta and his family's preparing for the worst whatever that means like we have no details about like what the injury is brain is it brain again that that's a good point sounds like he wouldn't be in the hospital this long if it wasn't serious like you don't just stay in the hospital for over a month um okay the other thing I saw today was this video of ben affleck jennifer lopez i don't really know much about their relationship i just

know that they got they were together and then she was with a rod and then i don't know who was ben affleck who did ben affleck date before j-lo was it garner jennifer garner or he dated jennifer garner so here we go ben affleck's dating history jennifer gardner anna de armas arm is that how you say it um and then j-lo so anyways this viral videos going around of them walking to the car JLo's wearing these like uh jean flare pants and a black turtleneck and she has like a bun in her hair holding a coffee and they're walking to the door and he like does such a I've seen this so many times you guys you've probably you know this

is a this is an uncommon to see couples like clearly annoyed at each other act like this like the body language is everything right here like let me watch it so it says this is page six miserable ben affleck slams door and jennifer lopez in viral video like they're walking to the car um is this somewhere in la um oh shit that's ben affleck visibly irritated irritated slamming the door and jennifer there's one person tweeting it's just so dumb like the pops are the paps the paparazzi got them walk into the car she gets in the car he slams the door walks around just looks so annoyed so irritated and then makes the most like the look on his face he looks right at the camera and he's

just like just so like just go watch it just go look up ben affleck jlo video and you'll find it he purposely looks away from her while she's getting in the car that you're definitely fighting yeah they're having a couple fight you can just tell it's just so classic like the body language is so like you've seen this a million times is like they're you know I don't I just see like you know that shit at the what were they were they at the Oscars or something the vmas and they got caught on camera like she got um it made made it look like they were fighting i don't know why i'm even talking about this i don't care i literally don't talk i don't like talking about celebrity shit because i just like for the most part don't care um

but the video is funny that's why i'm bringing it to bringing it to your attention um it's just so like classic couple fighting just oh he winks at the camera guy um isn't it weird how we like keep up with celebrities we don't even know like we literally don't even know these people yet we know everything about them i guess that's just how the world goes around but like i'm looking at a couple walking down the street right now like this could have been them it's just like it happens to be j-lo and ben affleck and we're so invested in their relationship and people are saying it's like a fake relationship they say shit like that all the time um so i don't know what to wrap up with

going house sitting i'm house sitting excuse me house sitting golf what else am i gonna do this weekend probably gonna lay out barbecue play with the dogs um what's on my list so I was supposed to make a bunch of doctor's appointments appointments this week and I haven't done it yet I literally still need to get my eyes checked I need to get a new dentist I need to go to the chiropractor uh I need a new dermatologist and yeah so there's just like I okay in my my dream is that there's like a master app for everything medical and you just like if you need an appointment or just I wish making doctor's appointments I know it's a quick phone call and you just scheduled a time but I just wish

everything was like this is I'm such a product of my generation like lazy what would you call me a lazy millennial I hate that term it's just like let's be more efficient because time is money and I value my time and I just hate bullshit phone calls that I don't need to make if I can just press a button you know like that's people might think that's lazy but I think that's actually smart so like working smarter not harder everyone's heard that phrase but um I just got another text sorry I'm so ADD right now um yeah I just wish it was easier what am I saying so speaking speaking of being a product of my generation

i actually wrote this down on at dinner last night i made salmon and quinoa and zucchini and brussels sprouts for dinner cool all right why am i talking so softly and we had edamame um but sorry I need to like this is the last topic I'm gonna go go on about and then I'm gonna end the episode so um I wrote this down at dinner I wrote like a few bullet points I don't know if this is gonna make sense when I read it but I wrote I don't want to be a statistic I don't want to be a product of my generation um I don't want to be bummed out I didn't get the fairy tale by 35 I want the fairy tale I'm not settling or holding on to something just because of that this is a

fairy tale I am dating my best friend in love of my life and I like literally wrote this in front okay the reason I wrote this down is like it's because I think I saw well I'll talk about that TikTok but like Corey and I have conversations about our relationship a lot and I'm like I said it I just it just came out of me last night I was like over dinner I'm like I was like I just don't want to be a product of my generation I feel like everywhere I look these days it's like people complaining about dating in 2023 and complaining about dating apps complaining about people being with you know men having horrible communication skills men not giving

women what they need in relationships like men sucking men are trash or women are you know these days are have some have such high standards and demands and need men to you know pay for everything and provide this first class class lifestyle and they have you know women are crazy and there's just like this yin yang of like bullshit between men and women and dating as you know 20 and 30 year olds in 2023 so I was talking to him I'm like I just I don't want I feel like I don't want to be caught up in that I'm not so I'm already I already have I've already created my reality and I'm already in this relationship that's that has nothing to do with that but I'm just like not only am I so glad I'm not in that situation at this point in my 20s I just like I don't want

that for myself and I think if you put that kind of energy out there if you're like I don't want to be a product of my generation I don't want to be a statistic of you know oh women in their 30s are making more money than men and yet they're they're having less children and they're you know not married like I don't want to have that I don't want to be that bitch sorry like it might be for you it's not for me I'm just so happy like I I'm starting I guess to take it more seriously now and value what I have so much more now than ever in my life because I see just in a year how amazing finding your best friend and life partner is and how like fulfilling it fucking is and how good for the soul it is and yeah and I know that's a luck of the draw some people

doesn't work out for them they don't ever find that I get that I have I'm very blessed in that way but um now Corey's calling me it's just like text calls all the I love it I mean maybe we're are we codependent which is some people categorize as that would we are we too close for I I mean fuck it whatever I'd rather my man blow my phone up all day and then not give a fuck about me and act like I don't exist so had both I'd prefer this um but yeah I don't know why I wrote that down I said um I'm not yeah I saw like the Alex Cooper clips of her saying because she just got engaged Alex Cooper host of Call Her Daddy if you don't know um and she said something and I was like I love how she phrased it she goes there's no settle so she's engaged to her fiance Matt

Kaplan I believe I think he's like I don't know what he does I think he's like a producer or something I don't know they're engaged as of like a few weeks ago and she did a podcast about it and I think she was talking to her friend she's like there's no settling or changing who I am at all like not even like one percent in this relationship and that's like her sign that she knows this is right because that's such a good um like gauge or what would you call that a good like mental test of like where you're at with your partner it's like I'm not settling one percent I'm not even I don't have to change myself one percent to be with this person and I think that

is just yeah again like I love how she said that and I feel the same way like um but fuck I don't know I could talk in circles all day long about this but um I think yeah the energy you got to put forward I don't know if this is like advice for dating if you're no one I mean you're not asking what I'm telling you guys anyways just assuming some people out there might be needing dating advice like it's just kind of like your your mindset around it's everything and I think it's easy to get suckered into the negative like you know just the men are trash group thing fucking conversation going on out in the world right now like i just cannot fucking stand it and you know i saw this tiktok it's going viral right now about this girl saying how

because of her female friendships and how great they are and how well her friends treat her something along those lines like um the standard or like the bar is so high for for men because you know to even like let me see if i can find it um i might have saved it or liked it i'm literally sweating right now fuck me um I think I liked it. Shit, I don't think I did. Let me just type in female friendships. I love the search feature on TikTok.

Like, you can, like, it pulls up so many good videos, actually. It's not popping up to the top. Yeah, it's just basically this girl saying, like, dating men is so hard because when you have such strong female friendships and the way you know women listen to you and and see you who for your see holy shit the way your friends see you for who you are and really deeply care about you is like I mean that's such that's like a yeah you know men have to live up to that or whatever I'm trying to fucking get it out and I can't it's of course um I'm trying to remember the TikToks exactly but I can't and I'm like yeah that's all good and well you know that's a good

point like the way your girlfriends are the relationships you have with girls and your is so strong and the way they treat you is so amazing that when a man does less than that it's just such a like what like I get the point do you guys kind of see the gist like I'm I'm trying to explain the gist I'm trying to get the point across it's hard to explain and I think I agree with that like I completely understand that um I don't think all women have positive experiences with other women I think there's like a balance I'm sure most girls have like you know issues with other girls here and there in their life and then they have like their best friends who are their sisters so I think that's most of us so I understand how that feels when you feel like

you're yeah like you have your best friends and what I'm trying to say here I don't know why I didn't cut to the chase earlier is men can be that too it's possible and I read the comments like I was going down the list on that video I wish I fucking saved it and I didn't and I just want I'm like I see these videos so much the whole point of me saying this oh my god Jacqueline in the episode is that it's fucking wild to me and I don't know if it's I guess it's rare it seems rare when I read the comments and I know it's just social media this represents such a small population in the world but I'm like they're talking like there's no hope they've never experienced that men have never treated that way they agree they agree and I'm like I it's I'm

sitting there going like i have that nope a man actually can treat you like that a man is can be your best friend a man can be just like your girlfriend but in a like a male form just like your best friend like it's possible it's fucking i'm like i'm a voice i want to be a voice for the fucking single people out there that people are struggling with men like it's fucking possible i and what i i guess i've i've tried to do this for a while now on my show i end up talking about dating relationships what i don't really know and i can't fucking figure out is like how you get it like how do you because i literally was on a dating app and i matched with cory and the rest is history like that's the path that i took to meet him now

i think it's a lot it's easy for most women out there to get a man keeping a man's different i don't know if that's the difference I don't know if that's where the advice needs to be directed towards is like the keeping the man part and like I don't know but it's also like you attract what you are and I think that's I don't know huge too people are just a mirror and when I like that's I don't know I used to go for the guys that didn't give a fuck about me because they were hot and the fact that they didn't give a fuck about me made them hotter and if you keep going up after those guys it's just not gonna it's never gonna work you're always gonna be disappointed and eventually

you're gonna start uh hating men so it's like I don't know just don't give up that's my advice just don't give up just be a good person uh be kind be nice literally like men are simple they just need a few things and do that and then yeah why did I go on that topic I actually have so much shit saved on my phone I forgot when I look at my tiktoks here um let me pull up what did I save we'll end it with like a tiktok i don't know if anyone saw that video like it makes sense like um the female friendships thing like it saved oh jamie foxx was recently hospitalized and word got out that he told the cops that someone tried to

kill him and there's rumors and speculation that it could possibly be p titty a video recently got out of jamie foxx explaining all the wild things that happen at p diddy's parties and that during one of these parties nick cannon was at his house when he was only 13 years old so i decided to look into p diddy and oh my goodness i might make a five-part series about this guy oh my god these videos oh my god the voice i might make a five-part series about these videos um what else did i save here like i didn't fucking know but there's some clear there's clearly some shady shit um this video gonna blow your mind so i followed him the whole time i remember watching at the beverly hills hotel i'm filming this and it's a pool party that is ridiculous

Jamie Foxx is the latest celeb to speak out on Diddy's rumored secret parties with younger men however fans are saying the real truth is even more disturbing and Jamie is probably holding back because he doesn't want people to know the wild things he was doing at those parties rumors about Diddy being on the DL and having a fondness for younger guys have been circulating for years and multiple people have come forward to say they this is a really long video it's like a five minute tiktok yeah so shit's brewing who knows what's real what's not um i just hope you know jamie foxx is okay because yeah he has like brain damage i don't know what that what that lithium rumor was or whatever i

read oh my god i saved this video of is this that you might have heard it the ai generated drake song here i'll play it is this like i never know if i can play music even though it's ai like i don't fuck it's on tiktok whatever here like are you kidding me what are the comments that's so good like that is actually such a good song like i want to download it like you know it's like fucking it's a robot that made that it's ai it's not even a fucking it's not even him um comment someone's comment drake had potential drake can now enjoy a drake release

this is what drake fans want from him best thing he released in five years this album is it a full album of ai music i don't know can you just ask chat gbt or whatever the fuck an ai audio thing to just like make a drake song like will it just non-stop generate that's what i don't get if you just ask i haven't played with like i've only played with the chat gbt like text thing but if you i don't know what the audio video ones are but can you just like ask it to create a drake song but like a hundred times and it'll make a different drake song a hundred like is it that good that's so fucking crazy that's like literal magic it's magic i think we're playing it's like the it's like dark magic it's like

I don't know if it's like I talked about it last week but like it hasn't really hit me how fucking powerful AI is yet like it's I know about it but like I haven't really seen it like this song is one thing but I can only imagine in like 10 years and okay the thing that someone brought up I forget what podcast I was listening to is like when i think it was a picture of taylor swift after her concert hanging out with maddie healy from the 1975 and apparently they're dating or there's rumors they're dating and i guess what people are saying is that was an ai generated picture of them two together after her concert now what's fucking wild is that the media sees that picture writes a story that they're dating

and it's like that was all what if it was all fake you know like how does the how is the media gonna know what's real and what's not so how are we ever gonna know what's real and what's not if it could be if it could be generated by ai so like literally it's just so like where does the it's like where's the line or like how do you know what's the how do we check realness or or fakeness like is there a way to measure that somehow and to test it it's like it's almost like we need a little ph stick you stick in the water and then it comes out a certain color and like okay this is cleaner it's like you know we need like a tester for ai somehow like is it something that can get scanned or should it always have like a watermark I don't fucking know

I feel like the point of it is to make it look realistic and not fake so like you wouldn't want to put I don't know I'm gonna think overthink it let's end on this video before you get into a relationship with somebody you need to ask yourself does this person need a sweet treat after dinner or are they not into that because if they don't need it and you do need it it's gonna be an issue they're gonna gaslight you and they're gonna be like no i don't i don't need a sweet treat but you do okay you need a sweet little morsel to round off the meal and that's normal and that's okay i love that video i've been saying sweet treat a lot um i watched that one time i'm like every night i'm like sweet treat sweet treat so that is so true like

just knowing whether you're a sweet treat person after dinner or not is so like crucial for a relationship to be healthy because like even if it's a square of dark chocolate literally like that is the baseline dessert I have every single night like just one piece of 85% fucking Uganda fair trade Trader Joe's dark chocolate wherever I get it like or or it's like we're going to fro-yo or we're getting basking robins or we're whatever it's like i require like 90 percent of the time i would say yeah 90 percent of the time i'm i'm i'm fiending fiending fiending fiending for something after dinner that's sweet um and so is cory so that's great because we have that in common i don't know if that's great because

there's we're pushovers with each other we're like if one person says you want ice cream the other one's like fuck yeah I don't push back I just say okay yeah let's do it and it happens 99% of the time so um yeah I don't know it's just crazy how like I I remember a year I think the first year I moved to San Diego by the way this is my anniversary month of moving to San Diego I moved here I think it was like May 30th in 2018 that was a year I was like literally not eating and I think I I can remember the two occasions I had ice cream that entire fucking year literally I have yeah I still remember exactly where I was and when I had it and now it's crazy how like I eat I look better I'm healthier and it's not like I'm

and I have ice cream regular like on a regular basis like it's no issue just so wild like life is beautiful like there's lessons to be learned all the time there's journeys to go on there's adversity to overcome there's challenges to face there's you know and I always wanted to have a balanced life but I was always high strung and freaked out about shit that doesn't matter and now that I'm on the other side I'm like it is possible to overcome anything and I think eliminating your thoughts is so fucking huge like the less you think about whatever the thing is that you struggle with it's like it makes sense when you say it out loud it's like if you stop thinking about it it doesn't exist or it'll go away and that's in my in my case that's what

happened so like because I think you again with the the chick I follow I've talked to her before it was what was it last week she goes life has been really hard lately and then she goes in on a tangent about how life has been hard and she lists everything out and I'm like oh here we fucking go again I think I saw there's this account I follow there's a term for she um it's one of my favorite like meme accounts like she's like no bs says it like it is what's her account called um i think she the term she uses is like over self-analysis oh yeah over self-anal overly self-analytical and i and i don't know how to word it i talk about it a lot like overthinking over um analyzing yourself going within too often like too much of that is not good too much of

anything isn't a good thing but um back to this chick I feel like she overthinks and analyzes every single aspect of her life and it's always kind of like ho-hum miserable and she focuses on how there's stress and there's too much work and there's not a lot of this and i'm just like oh and then the period stuff shall we talk it's just like focusing on that and talking about it's like yeah you're relatable you're trying to like you know make your audience feel like they're not alone or whatever because like but i just feel like when people focus on problems they have more problems period it's just it manifests you just create more of it like i've and i i i don't want to name it's weird like i don't want to be specific or like say who it is because it's like i'm not

sitting here talking shit i'm speaking out of love because i see a problem this person's life i'm like i know she's a therapist i know she has people helping her but like i'm like you're doing it to yourself that's my fucking phrase for everything i'm like people just do shit to themselves you make your life a living hell you are in your own way it's your fault like and I don't know what it is it like fucking pisses me off because I'm like I get I don't know why I care so much about other people I'm like you have one life it life is happiness is fucking free okay it's free and everything you do is your fault it's you bitch it's you okay you're in control you're in charge have a fun free fabulous fucking life

by making good choices and thinking positive thoughts it's not that hard and like I always say and I don't know how I got this but it's like I had this um he's calling me again because I'm podcasting I'm not calling back I had this like weird transition in my mid-20s where I got so chilled out and I would literally say out loud like nothing's that nothing is a problem nothing is ever a big problem or a big deal to me I always figure out a solution I always figure out a way to get to the other side like I never like the smallest things that happen like getting someone you know I don't know like slashes my tires you know I'm fucking pissed for two seconds but then I get the tire fixed or like I that's a bad example that's like never happens

um you know just like little like oh I stubbed my toe or no that's a bad example again Jacqueline come up with something better but just like the little life things that happen I literally just like I have zero and I'm not even I'm not like I don't know how to teach I almost feel like how do you fucking teach us I haven't I almost don't I'm not reactive like I see like Louie might piss on the floor this is a great test for us as future parents like louie's still here and there has accidents i see the piss on the floor i see the dog okay he didn't it's always your fault you didn't take him out you didn't train them well like it's not the dog's fault it's your fault um yes they know better yes he cowers yes he looks like he's in trouble because he knows he

did something wrong however i see the puddle and literally i just go straight to the towel thing the paper towel thing i clean it up it gets some lysol spray it clean it up put him on a leash take him outside i don't yell it i don't like take there's no oh my god he pissed on the floor fucking i don't scream i don't yell same with cory that's what i'm saying like he doesn't he's the same way as me like we just get we just get shit done we just move on that's where i've talked about it before the most if you want to be happy this is my tip my life tip and i'm going to end the episode. I'll finally end it. If you want a nice life, if you want to feel good, if you want to be happy. Okay. Understand that first of all, first of all, life is chaos. It can, it can be

chaotic. You might have a lot of fires to put out every day. Okay. But you don't need an elephant by in one bite you chew you do what is corey always you take one bite at a time okay that's how you eat an elephant so with all the fires you got to put out just approach it one foot in front of the other okay that's just like the basics right there now life is life can be chaotic some days are better than others but when those chaotic moments happen okay when you're you get a flat tire when your dishwasher breaks when uh i don't know just something something goes awry at the home just the way to be happy and this is so simple but just fucking sit down and absorb this absorb this right now is

going from the problem to the solution in as short as in as little time possible problem solution not problem you come across a problem go oh fuck you scream about it you get all upset your heart races and you fucking freak out none of that shit you just militant straight you just no emotion just go to the solution okay maybe your cat dumped over your plant there's potting soil all over the kitchen floor just go grab your vacuum and clean it up that's what I'm talking about I know this can be applied to bigger problems this could be applied to anything you're dealing with at work maybe you have an important meeting that you need to make a presentation for it's like problem solution problem I haven't made the presentation solution

make the presentation just it's just that simple but yet we're all in it but our monkey minds are our brains are like they get in the way so many just it's like and again back to what I was saying earlier it makes me so frustrated because I look at people's one beautiful life and I'm like they're making their life harder for themselves they're clearly shooting themselves in the foot by how they react how it's like your emotion your emotional reactions are unnecessary and for so and I know we're humans I know we we feel it's everything so deeply we're only human I get it okay but I feel like people's reactions to their problems in their lives it doesn't match in a lot a lot of people out there that i've i've witnessed i you know people in my life

not to be you know it's like when the punishment doesn't fit the crime it's like your reaction doesn't fit the problem your reaction to the problem doesn't fit what the problem was in the first place so yeah it's just that fucking simple and that's why when i say i live a good life no there's no issues everything's good it's because I just I don't make anything a big deal I don't nothing and I know I'm blessed I know how I have a cushy life however shit does happen I still have things I have to deal with that are hard and I just put one fucking foot in front of the other and I don't get caught up in my emotions at all I don't know if that's robotic and not really I don't know

hey some people like chaos some people like drama some people thrive off like literally just grinding hard working just pushing against the boulder every day it's a grind grind grind I just want to feel exhausted I just want to be mentally just taxed that's how I know that I I feel alive when I'm like that so that's for some people I think actually thrive in that way but I'd say that for a lot of us out there doing the latter doing or doing the former what I was talking about and just chilling out and getting shit done moving the problem from the problem to the solution short time possible it's probably a better route anyways that's just my two cents holy shit why did this it always ends up being life advice at the end of the episode

I'm drenched in sweat because I have to shut all the doors here so that the sounds like nice and you don't hear the, uh, beach waves crashing outside. I'm kidding. I'm not that close. I'm pretty close. I'm not that close. Um, I'm wearing a crew neck and fucking Adidas joggers and it's sunny out and what the fuck I need to end the episode. Uh, thank you for hanging out. Thanks for tuning in. I hope you enjoyed my stories. Um, am I a storyteller? I feel like I'm a storyteller should i call myself that in my instagram bio storyteller it's like one time i looked at logan paul's um what's it called his bio and it's like artist creator artist i like people

sorry i'm not i just i just see stuff sometimes it's like i'm even judgmental of people's capitalization or lack of capitalization okay there is just just no i maybe that's my my brand maybe that's the show i am like so judgmental like i know we all this is the thing we're all doing it i'm just out here talking about it publicly okay i there is an influencer who I'm like nine out of ten cringed out and annoyed by at this very moment that I just I wish I could talk about publicly how I would do their rebrand and how they could change what they're posting how they're posting how they're doing this how

they're doing that so that they just come across more fucking real because they are real this is what i this again i care so much about people that i don't it's like bitch like some people it's just never gonna you can't solve it solve it all and this is this is of course in my opinion they're just so they're so real right and yet when they post it's like not there's a gap there's a disconnect of who they are and on you know when they're being real and they have a podcast i'll just say okay this is a person in the podcast i'm like oh my god it's just like you're getting more and more phony with the shit you're posting i'm like i just i i wish but god i always check in whenever i talk about other people i always check it i'm like fuck am i doing that fuck me

i got this new app this tezza filter app i'm using the tezza filter a lot makes everything kind of like brown does that make me look like a big bitch on my Instagram story all right I gotta go I love you thanks for hanging out please subscribe to the podcast do your homework review the show and I'll talk to you next week bye I got a lot of shit to say so I'ma do this every day I'll be writing things until I'm fucking buried in my grave six feet deep wonder but my body won't decay because my messages are timeless so they'll put them on display oh yeah I rap with a certainty I have a sense of urgency A message for eternity for everyone internally

I had some people burning me but now they fucking learning See I ain't the one to fuck with Now they looking nervously and I don't really care What you think of me respectfully you you you you

Thank you.