The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 376- ADHD Test: This Could Explain A Lot..

Episode Date: June 28, 2024

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What's up, guys? It's episode 376. Welcome back to the show. I don't ever slow up. No, I don't teach. I've got no love for the fakeness. If you want to play tough and want to hate this, I'll always show up and make a statement. I don't ever slow up. No, I don't teach. I've got no love for the fakeness. If you want to play tough and want to hate this, I'll always show up and make a statement. hey what's up it's Jacqueline welcome back to the show how are you doing how about that debate right yeah go Trump go Trump go Biden go Trump mostly Trump little Biden little Trump uh who am I

waiting for take your guess okay i'm gonna bring you in right now um yeah how about that debate it's currently friday friday at 9 48 a.m uh typically for the last four years at this hour i would be deep in my emails and my and a spreadsheet uh scrambling to get my work done by noon so I could fuck around on on Friday on a Friday and not have to deal with work um but now we're back on the microphone once again did I even say hi welcome back to the show I think I did yeah we're back on the mic for another episode it's gonna be a great episode today um I feel like this is gonna be a very like I'm just gonna bring you in and kind of tell you what's happening um and just like what's going on because it's not like a lot but like this is gonna be okay

anyways we'll get into that I'm currently drinking a sparkling water a strawberry sunset bubbly ah and a nice coffee cool so let me uh please oh shit please hit that subscribe button wherever you're listening right now, I'm on, I'm on Apple Spotify, Google podcast, Google podcast, it's your breaker overcast for every listen podcast. Please hit that subscribe button. This is a weekly show. I put out an episode every Friday, so please hit that subscribe button, review the show five stars. And most importantly in this current chapter of my, uh, life, please go follow me on TikTok and engage with my latest posts because, um, I'm now a TikToker and that's, I'm like split right now. I'm like, am I a podcast host or am I a TikToker? Like I,

this has never happened to me in my social media career. And now I'm like, I'm, I'm split. I'm, I'm conflicted. I'm like, what do I go hard on? I mean, obviously both, I'm never giving this up, but like, I just got the bug for TikTok hardcore because once they monetize your little, your little profile, it's like, okay, we're off to the races. You're in the game. It's like, I feel like the social media, it's like coach put me in, I'm on the field, everything I post now, like, yeah, it's crazy. It's like, I just, it's so fun to like wake up in the morning when your TikTok's monetized and like see your account just like grow and grow and grow. And you're like, Oh, hi. Um, I guess this is what monetization feels like, like on

YouTube, which I'm also still working on. So please also subscribe to my YouTube channel, patreon.com slash TJMS. If you want to support the show, it's $5 a month. Uh, check it out. Patreon.com slash TJMS. Yeah, I do have a Patreon. Um, I think that's it for the plugs. um yeah let me just bring you in and kind of talk about like my morning what's going on so uh it's Friday it's Friday baby does anyone watch uh the h3 podcast when they have Gabe on on Fridays it's Friday baby that's why I always say that um it's now permanently stuck man okay so um i woke up at 4 a.m and i couldn't sleep so naturally i went on amazon and bought constipation tea

and then i took a gander on some athleisure uh some athleisure websites some wedding uh wedding dress like cocktail like white dress wedding dress attire websites what else um yeah I woke up at 4 a.m we watched the debate I'll talk about like what we did last night for the debate because like I've been like looking forward to this for so long and to be honest like kind of underwhelmed like it was not like what I thought but um yeah it was an early morning for me. I scrolled on my phone, fell back asleep, overslept past our alarm. Didn't get to the gym till seven. Um, I was tired of shit and decided that I don't care what my aura ring says. I don't care that my recovery was complete trash. I'm hitting a heavy leg day because I just felt like

it. Like, I don't know how to explain it. Like sometimes. And I honestly, I feel, I felt better after. Like sometimes those fitness tracker apps and like, I have an, I have an Apple watch and an aura ring. I'm one of those people, but sometimes it like gets in your head and then it's like, wait, you think you're, I don't know. So I, sometimes I go, okay, I know I didn't get the best sleep and it's saying that I have a poor recovery, but I'm going to listen to my body. And my body was like, go do those Bulgarians on the Smith machine, bitch. Like go do those dead go do those hip thrusts like anyways so that was our morning um we worked out and fed the dogs recorded a video for cory um oh my god i'm not so a couple things that are like

some hot button issues in my life right now are number one i have a cyst in my armpit um an ingrown hair am i being gross today i feel like okay first of all i'm wearing like my Adam Sandler outfit like just I look like a garbage can or garbage it's like I'm draped in just whatever clothes I could find that are comfy no makeup skincare hair in a bun you know like I'm just feeling like it's one of those episodes I'm gonna be a little gross I have a ingrown hair or some sort of like infected follicle in my armpit and this like happens like once a year I'll get something weird like this and it's like what's that um and it hurts because I stabbed that thing so hard with a needle as soon as like if you have a picking addiction or

like if you have if you're a picker or like and we're gonna by the way we're gonna do an I finally found an online test to take uh about don't before I say like please like I know this is, is kind of like, why are you doing this? Like, don't do this. Like you're fine. But like, it's an ADHD test for women. And I just, I'm curious what the results are because what was I saying? Oh, was the, if you're a picker like me, um, or if you have like a OCD, like hyper fixation thing with like picking your face. Oh yeah. Yeah. So anyways, like literally I since I woke up I saw it in this morning when I woke up at 4 a.m like or I felt it like it was there and then ever since then all I've been thinking about this morning was popping it like

I could not wait for Corey to go off go to work because like I'm gonna be in that bathroom with a needle and I'm gonna fucking drain this thing because it's like the size of what's like like a blueberry like I would give it yeah like it's like a blueberry sized cyst and um long story short I stabbed it and now it hurts even worse and nothing came out it was just like clear liquid like okay boring um I was hoping it was like white and pussy and like I was hoping like a volcano would shoot out because I've done that before oh my god I'm not even gonna go into this one okay that's going too far um something down south was also ingrown one time and I also stabbed that and it literally shot out like six feet away from my body with you know I was getting laser hair removal for a good

six months and I don't know why I stopped but um now I'm like highly considering getting back to it because these are the kinds of problems that I don't like to deal with with shaving and like ingrown hairs and shit and it's summertime like I was supposed to be but this is the thing i'm tan i am so tan right now i am so tan i finally figured out the best tanning oil the best like thing to put on your skin when you tan i'll just tell you now it's just plain coconut oil on top like if you want to do sunscreen do that and then put coconut oil on top but i'm so tan and i could not do laser hair removal if i was tanning this i would have to do i can't tan and do laser hair removal at the same time so you literally it's like you have this window of

opportunity in the winter time to do it and then if you're gonna be so yeah anyways fuck so that's and then also the other hot button like thing happening in our life right now is we have an ant infestation these mini they're the tiniest little ants and I know it's summertime and it's hot but it's honestly the only flaw about this home we just found our first flaw since we moved in like there was a little ant I think I found one in my sports bra drawer the other day and I was like that's interesting little ant in my drawer weird didn't didn't think anything of it and then next thing I know it's on my toothbrush there's like a little ant crawling around my toiletries in the bathroom and then I was like there's like 10 ants in here they're on the ground they're on

the counter so I was like okay we got ants well then I was in the kitchen okay making cupcakes I made brownie cupcakes the other the other night and once again saw a couple ants and then the next day got worse anyways we have an ant infestation we took these so I looked up the best traps or like best bait or like ant killer stuff and it's called I think taro taro ant poison it's really sad first of all I hate I do not enjoy I don't like killing spiders right like I'm one of one of those people like it's so hard for me to like kill things like I just feel so sad about it so even putting out these little traps and like the second they crawl in there because they're it's it's this clear liquid they like crawl into the trap and they like take this clear liquid some

of them die inside of it but some of the some of them survive and they take the liquid back into their ant hive hill what do ants live in hills ant hives ant wherever they live they take it back do they have a queen like wait a minute are bees and ants like doing the same thing with their colonies like is there a queen ant there must be ant bites are so bad too like I've had I've had bad experiences with ants in the past like big ants like fire ants or whatever like oh I've stepped on an ant hill oh my god worst day of my life I think that was at my brother's little league baseball game one time I was in like flip-flops walking around and just like it took me out so yeah we have an ant thing so this morning we go to the gym

Cory's like I think I called him autistic that was fucked up no I was like he was like he was hyper he doesn't have like like all like I said I'll like hyper fixate on a zit or like you know like something I don't know I'll be like fidgety with stuff where I'm like I can't stop doing the same repetitive thing over and over but he's not like that like at all in any way but like with these ants he was like this morning I'm like he had like one sock on like maybe he put on a pair of gym shorts and was like just staring at the ants zoning out and he's like we got to kill him we got to get rid of him what are we going to do and he just couldn't like stop focusing on it and I'm like Corey like can we do it after the gym because like I can't watch you kill kill them

right now and we're also running late because we slept in anyways so he he ended up going in there with some heavy duty you know Lysol disinfectant spray and um he wiped him out but I didn't say this when we woke up this morning so there was like I think when we went to bed there was like maybe like 20 ants in there there and I had a nightmare by the way I had a nightmare I was like oh my god there's gonna be like a pile of ants when we wake up and lo and behold we wake up thousands of ants like they were literally we had I think four traps set up it attracted all of the ants from the colony and they were just like all over our counter everywhere it was so disgusting and like I said like I was so focused on like getting to the gym I was like I know this is

so gross and so bad, like we cannot do this till we get home. So he Lysol them and I still have to clean them up. So we'll talk about like the cleaning situation right now, but let me get to my notes here. Cause I mean, I could talk about my thoughts on the debate. Obviously that was last night. Um, I have a story about our neighbors, um, and our backyard. I have, I mentioned the ADHD test um I have a dog park story about Louie a skunk update um little wedding planning updates birthday updates because my birthday's in two weeks I'm turning 30 I'm just saying it I'm turning 30 on July 7th so if you want to wish me a happy birthday early uh review the show five store five stars or support the show at patreon.com slash tjms as always um cool so

I'm just checking out my notes here to make sure we're on task yeah so it's like one of those days where here's how I've been living my life lately so because I can work from home and work anywhere I work on my phone work on my laptop like I've just I have been I've been sunbathing and I have been soaking up the summer sun like I am laying out every day I'm just like relaxing I'm making content I'm at home and I'm like it's it's been so great but like this is one of those days where and here's what that here's the thing about when it's sunny here um I'm in San Diego I feel like I have a few new listeners or so maybe more than that um from my TikTok. So if you didn't know, I live in San Diego. Um, but I have, I I'm, it's so hard

to be inside. That's the thing. It's so hard to be inside and be productive when it's super nice out. Like I'm not good at that. So I'm like the mornings are, the mornings are for work and like going hard, kind of like my old job where I was like, Oh, I was getting those spreadsheets done and all my work turned in by noon so I could go enjoy my day. Um, but that's kind of how it is now like the second that marine layer blows off and those clouds clear out like I am out on that deck like tanning and putting on coconut oil and just like being I feel like this it's my favorite thing ever like being tan is my favorite thing ever like sunshine summertime it smells good oh my god I think our neighbors like mowed the lawn this morning it

smells like fresh cut grass. Um, it's just, it's a great time. This is my favorite. If you didn't know, like I think fall is great because of like football and like the holidays going into the winter time and that's great and all, but like summer is my favorite. I love summer. I love enjoying my summer and not putting all this pressure on myself to like, I don't need to do a lot. Like it's like fucking vacate. I'm on vacation. Okay. First of all, I am 12 weeks out for my wedding starting Monday July 1st is Monday okay my birthday's on the 7th and I made this commitment to myself where I said this thing I was like or I made this like mental thing or pact I don't know where I'm like I was like I want to enjoy this time because it's like when else it's

like you're planning a wedding you're prepping for your wedding like be be your best do your best like feel good, be relaxed and Zen. And, and, you know, I've been going to yoga. I've been going to hot yoga multiple times a week. I've been doing Pilates. Like I've been laying out in the sun and I'm like, you know what? I don't feel bad about this at all. Like I'm just very much embracing this time of my life because I know that, you know, in the future, life's going to get busy with kids and stuff and responsibilities. And I'm like, you know what? I'm chilling right now because I'm trying to be really balanced about it all and not I'm not putting a lot of pressure on myself to like you know grind to the grindstone or whatever but I don't know how to

know but I the thing is is like you'll never see me out on my like I don't read books when I tan like I'm like on my phone like responding to TikTok comments like making content or editing or like getting ready to post something like it's or like thinking about my podcast like what I'm gonna do with that and I'm like not good at relaxing like I'm out there like because I feel guilty like I can't just be fucking off in the sun and not work like I have to be it's like Tuesday you know like you have to work so um again I've been really like balanced about it all and I'm just like not putting all this crazy pressure on myself because this is like a really exciting time and it's starting to like get real um the wedding and yeah monday i'm like it's it's time and i

think i'm gonna do a series on my tiktok about like wedding prep and like how i'm gonna look and like what i'm doing to look and feel my best and like maybe record my work yeah no i'm not recording my workouts i just cannot film myself in a gym it's just so weird i just can't do it personally I'll probably like talk about like I'll do like what I eat in a days maybe that might be interesting and like I'll do like my skincare prep for my wedding and I'll talk about like the planning itself and like what we're doing um it's 12 weeks away Monday and we're not sending invitations until like week 10 or 10 weeks out 8 to 10 weeks is the new thing so which is crazy Cause like most people are like, that's like, cause you send out the, save the dates way in

advance. And then the actual invitation doesn't go out until like eight to 10 weeks now. So, um, cause I feel like people are busy, you know, life gets, goes by fast and like, you forget, it's like, oh shit, that wedding, you know? And then they sent the invitation a year before. And I think it's better when you give them a little like shorter notice, you give them the invitation closer to the date so they like can think ahead like oh in three months or in two months we're going to this um so yeah that's kind of what's happening there so we have yeah should I tell the neighbor story um yeah so today's one of those days by the way like I'm just gonna keep bringing you in I'm like hanging hanging out chilling we're podcasting

I have the biggest pile of laundry I think we've ever produced as a couple in the last two years on our bed right now that I need to like deal with and I'm just I might leave it until Corey gets home because we kind of we'll do like a folding party together and it makes it like less I don't know annoying because I don't I really don't like you know if I have to think about it like laundry's a bitch especially when you work out a lot and there's always like sweaty clothes you got to clean. And now that I've been going to hot yoga, it's like, there's just so much like sweaty, gross shit. Um, that's like constantly in the rotation that you got to like keep up with. Cause I will not leave. I'm sorry. Like I cannot leave my sweaty clothes in a basket for like more

than more than like two days where I'm maybe three, but like, I don't know. I just get, I feel like it permeates the fabric and then you can't get that smell out. And all these natural detergents I've been using are not cutting it. And honestly, life update, we went back to gain. We went, we went back to gain. We went, we went back to, I mean, we use Lysol today on the ants. We're not using the natural clean, uh, disinfectant sprays. I just can't do it. I'm like, I go in phases of like, I'm going to clean up everything and we're not going to have any toxic chemicals or fragrances. And then, you know, now we're back to gain. And I love gain. I think it's one of the best. Yeah. I think it's the best laundry

detergent. Um, I'm not a tide girl. I like a good, uh, all free and clear. I grew up on all free and clear. Um, with a scoop of oxy oxy. Did that oxy clean guy die? See, this is where I'm like, I have ADHD oh life update I called my dad again we talked again and that's a thing so yeah um we had a great talk the other day good and bad actually it was kind of one of those things where we were like at the very end we're like that was a lot but this is healthy we're gonna have to go through these hard talks to like get to the other side so um but something that I'm gonna talk to him about next I think we're gonna do like if you don't know the backstory go listen to my the episode before this about calling my dad for the first time in two years on father's day um

and anyways I think we're gonna do like a weekly call kind of like a weekly therapy session and it's funny he mentioned something about his brain that I thought was really interesting like how he has photographic memory and it and I did not like I don't I just feel like I get my wild hyperactive creative brain from my dad and so I want to talk to him more about like that and like what because I don't really I haven't really had guys I don't really want to get into all the details but like I don't really know him anymore if you know what I mean so you don't know because I haven't said anything but it's this weird thing where now that I'm talking to him again I'm like I need to like get to know my dad and like kind of start this start this over if that makes sense

Cause it's been like 10 years, um, since I've really had like a normal face-to-face relationship. I haven't, I've called him for the first time in two years on father's day. And then I hadn't, I haven't seen him in over six years. So, um, you know, everyone's got a different, you know, deck of cards in life. And that's what I was dealt with my parents. And, um, it is what it is, but yeah. So a life update, I called my dad again. Um, let's get into the debate I don't know yeah everyone's talking about the debate um it just wasn't like I'll say this like it just wasn't like Trump didn't he he didn't go hard and like act psycho which I

like he didn't give his full like throttle to Biden like he wasn't like and I think that was by design because the Democrats wanted this debate like they wanted this to happen and so okay let's do it and they're expecting Trump to be you know his Trumpy crazy self and yet he was so composed and calm and like they I feel like they have nothing on him like they can't and then you know Biden I felt I felt bad for him I mean he was just like I know everyone feels that way it's like it's a it's you're just watching a train wreck the entire time and but he did a lot better I have to say I haven't been paying attention to this election or like I haven't watched many speeches most of the Biden stuff I see is like him falling off of a plane or or like him like

tripping up on his words so those are usually the clips I see so like to watch him like produce full sentences and full thoughts and like do that I mean he had some hiccups obviously we all know about that but or we all saw that but like I was like damn actually this isn't as bad as I was expecting and everyone's talking about like the drugs they put him on and like the prep that they give him for like these speeches and these appearances and the first thing I thought of though because I've been kind of in on the conspiracy that he's got a clone or like a or someone like wears a mask because there's like these really weird videos where it's like this isn't Biden but it like looks like him you know but like the first thing I noticed when they came

on stage last night was like that's a hundred thousand percent Biden like you cannot convince me that there's some sort of like clone or double doing this that was totally him and yeah it was just kind of like a like a it was just kind of like I don't know it wasn't that exciting I think um what I was what I found super refreshing was CNN these reporters when they were doing their post debate debrief just being like because typically i feel like that the cnn reporters are so like delusionally confident about or like they're so like like they just only say supportive good nice things about biden and so like for them to say that was bad and he didn't do a good job and i think tomorrow morning they're going to be having a discussion if he should continue or not

like to hear them say that was super refreshing and kind of unexpected because like usually it's just like fuck Trump Biden's great you know like they only say like oh he's they you know what I mean like they're always gassing him up and it's like how are you saying that with a straight face like how are you that like I know they're paying you to say this but like you know so there was a little shift last night after the debate which was kind of nice to see um I don't know it's just it's a, it's a fun thing to watch, I guess, as a, as a spectator, as a citizen, you're just, or it's not even, it's not, I mean, it's not great, but it's good content. It's good. It's interesting. Um, I thought it was funny when they were going, going at each other about golf

and their handicaps and Biden or Trump's like, I've seen your swing. And I remember the gist of it but um okay so let's get into the neighbors and the house update let me get a little sound effect on no new segment um hold on let me get my coffee this chobani creamer by the way slaps so i saw an influencer i follow pour this chobani sweet cream creamer in her iced coffee And I was like, what's this about? And then I saw like 10 other people do it within a week. And I was like, is this a sponsorship going on with Chobani? I don't really know. But then I saw it in the grocery store. I turned that little container around to check the ingredients. And it's literally like milk, cream or it's like cream, milk, cream and sugar or something like no or maybe like natural flavors, which who knows what that means. but it wasn't like full of a bunch of BS. So I thought maybe, is that why everyone's into it right now is because it's like a super like straight up no BS creamer. Um, it's obviously, it's got a lot of sugar in it. It's very sweet, but it's so good for iced coffee. Like I made

frosting the other day with it. Um, I was in the mood to bake and I made vanilla frosting with it. So, um, but yeah, let's get into the house updates. So if you didn't know, we moved into this house, Corey and I bought a house back in February and we're redoing our backyard. So the latest update, we have, we have this like steep backyard that goes into a Canyon and we're trying to make it functional. So there's a way to get down into the yard. That's like nice. Like we, we put in stairs, we're going to put in like a railing. We built a retaining wall. We have like a, a, a section that's like a separate level from the main yard. So we've been working on it. And the biggest thing we've been trying to decide on is the fence. And we

finally picked one out and we put in a fence over what was that last week? Actually, I think on my last episode, the guys were here working when I was recording this. I forget. There's always a crew here this is like a really calm week like have we had any gardeners or any like construction or any I don't think so um so yeah we put in a fence and they did it in like two days it was crazy I was like holy it was so I like blinked and it was done I'm like how did they do it that fast um but anyways um I've mentioned this before but one thing about me is I'm not a good neighbor I don't answer my door or I'm a good neighbor. Shouldn't say I'm not a good neighbor. But one thing about me is I don't answer my front door like ever for any reason. Don't, I never

want to put a face to the name. Like I never want to put my face and this house together as like, Oh, this girl lives here. Cause who knows who's not, who's knocking on your door. Right? Like you just never know. And it's a safety thing. And we have a ring camera so we can see who's there. Corey usually answers the ring and he'll talk to the person through the camera thing and it's what we've always done and for some reason on the day they finished building the fence I got a ring for the doorbell rang um the dogs are going nuts and I'm like oh I thought it was the workers like my brain just went like oh it's the workers like they're gonna come tell tell me they're they're done and they want me to check it out because they've done that before

so I just assumed oh it's the workers like that because they've rang the door before and it was them and I've talked to them so this was unfortunately not the right call or actually it was I guess but um the okay they ring the doorbell and I didn't check the ring because my notifications I had to turn them off because it was too chaotic with the workers going by the ringing every two seconds anyways detail you don't need to know but that's what I do here hi I'm recalling all the specific details um I feel like when I listen to podcasts and they're like really descriptive it helps the story so much like more is more like you're never gonna get too much color or it's never you can never color something too much with a story it's like

um so I didn't check the ring so I didn't see who it was and I opened the door and they're like sorry or they're like oh don't worry we're not Mormons it's like oh that's funny okay and I'm like who's this dude and who's this old lady and I'm like okay hi like hi I'm like hi what's going on they're like hi we're your neighbors we live across the canyon I'm like oh fucking here we go fucking here we go I knew it it's the second they said we live across from you like they share a property line with us basically like I knew where this is going I knew the tone all right it was immediate and I was like fucking a and basically we have our property they have theirs and they assumed that this fence we built is on their property or they're like they're like making

sure we were, we got it surveyed, which we did and it's not in their territory. And they're basically like, yeah, we don't want to have a problem. So, um, you know, we might be getting this survey just so you know, if someone's back there, that's what we're doing. And, um, I think our property touches the older woman's house, like her property line, not his. So it's her that would be doing it, which I mean, not to profile and be like this, but like, you know, some people are bored and they're old and they're like, what else am I going to do? They have no drama in their life. other than, you know, the cat taking a shit outside of the litter box and needing a denture replacement. I don't know. That's so mean. Like I level, like I have a big

heart. Trust me. I do have a big heart. That's why I said I felt bad about Biden tripping up on his words. Because one thing, one thing about me is I respect the elderly and I, and I feel like they're honestly like the forgotten in this, in our society. And it's kind of sad. And so I don't mean to be like, Oh, this old lady has no life. And all she wants to do is like pick a fight with with their young neighbors who just built a fence on her property you know so anyways we're gonna see how this turns out I think it's just better to be safe than sorry so I think maybe they'll get it surveyed or we will again I don't fucking know but it's so annoying because like we want to plant trees and like finish the yard and we're like

if is there even a possibility that they're right and that it could have been put too far on their property I don't know I feel like no because we did our due diligence and we made sure that we were in the clear with where we where there's already a fence there so you know what I mean um but that happened speaking of the canyon speaking of the canyon new segment it's like come on jack i'm like you can get more cream than that oh fuck i can do wait i can do uh i can do oh my god what what what voice is this what oh my god oh my god okay i'm obnoxious

sorry i got carried away uh so we have a neighborhood skunk as you know in the canyon and i do have an update on the skunk actually the the baby skunk so a couple nights ago um actually it's like early in the morning it was about like five in the morning i think when this happened it was like early early morning just like the sun coming up you know and first of all there is nothing cuter than a golden retriever trying to growl or like they do this little like it's like it's not it's so not even scary but like they do it and it's so cute and so through our door like I heard Jimmy just going you know like I don't know it wasn't like he was barking at something it was like a little growl under his breath and I was like oh I wonder what

that is. Cause like, if it was a person, the thing about the dogs is like, they bark like crazy with people, but like a little growl, I'm like, Hmm, what's out there. You know, like, what's this about? So Corey's like, Jacqueline, come look, come look. And I look out and there's a baby little skunky, the cutest little baby skunk. It's so cute. It's like the size of a kitten crawling around, just like walking around our deck, you know, just exploring the deck and it eventually wandered off and I took a cute little video of it. And, uh, long story short, that bitch is flattened on the road right now. And, uh, it died guys. It's done. It's gone. You cannot convince me that that little carcass on the, on the street down, it's like a little further down

from our house. Isn't that baby skunk? Because there's the mama skunk we've seen. We see her almost like every day and then she had a baby and I and I talked about that how Corey called me he's like Jacqueline I'm looking at this second tail behind the mama but behind the big skunk she had a baby and so you know nature took its course that tire that tire took its course at 25 miles per hour probably not very fast and that skunk is that baby skunk is it just wasn't his time it just wasn't uh her time his time and so now we're with we're down we're down a skunk um the new the new baby skunk that we saw it was so sad I'm like we just saw it the other morning on our deck and it was so cute and I took a little video skunks are cute like I know they're like they have

a bad reputation for like squirting their fecal matter whatever they squirt their spray all over and stink up neighborhoods and like spray dogs and poison i don't know but aesthetically like are optically like they're cute they're fluffy they're black and white they're very like you know what i always think of wasn't there like a sexy skunk in the goofy movie wasn't she like the girlfriend of i don't know so that's the skunk update um oh yeah so neighbors the skunk we went golfing on sunday i think we're gonna go again this weekend and go to the san diego fair maybe i don't know we just really want a churro we're literally like gonna we're gonna show up at the fair get a churro get a second churro probably a third

churro and then like walk around and see the farm animals and just like dip because like we're not about to get on these rides. Like one thing about me is I trust Universal Studios, Disney, Knott's Bar, I've never been, but like local fair, local fair, local fair rides. What am I saying? I don't trust that at all. Because first of all, I don't know who said this but like they pack it up and go a lot and it's like there's a lot of disassembly or disassembling and putting up of these rides and it's like there's a lot of room for error and loose screws and the people themselves are missing screws in their brains typically you know typical carnies or like that um i don't know the vibe of the people though at the the del mar fair because

is it the san diego fair i think they changed it to the san diego fair not the del mar fair it's in del mar um at the racetrack or like where is it wait hold on oh yeah they have like this big they have all these facilities specifically for yeah the fair and stuff um but i didn't we didn't ride them on the first time we went to the fair was like the month we met and i don't think we rode rides then we just got churros and walked around but yeah i don't know because like back where I grew up oh my god they were classic carnies like just they have that like homeless person energy I don't really know what it is it's just like they're it's sad okay honestly heart goes out I have a big heart for the homeless as you know and the elderly I'm trying to be nice

you know um but if I was to profile and like draw comparisons there's like a homeless person vibe or like a similarity between carnies and homeless people like but what is that energy they exude it's like sometimes they talk fast or it's just like I know it's the drugs and stuff but it's almost like their aura just gives off crackhead I don't know it's like just like a little something's like going on up there and it's I don't know it's like their smiles they have a certain type of i'm gonna not continue this because like i said everyone gets a different deck of cards in life and we need carnies and god bless them for safely operating their rides when they do but i will not be participating in the uh the zipper the ferris

wheel the tour like what's that one where you get in it's like a room and you get like it's like the gravity sucks you against the wall. Um, no, we're just not going to do the ride. So yeah. Golfing the fair. I think we're going to see his parents. Um, Tik TOK update. I'm still obviously popping off on my Tik TOK. One of my videos is at like 700,000, which is so crazy. Cause like, it's just like so many of you, I just never get that ever on any of my content like that many views so it's TikTok's pumping I'm doing it and I feel like it's really fun because like for the most part I wake up every day and I like post a couple videos interact with my audience and it's like yeah this is what TikTok is all about this is what you do so I'm just doing

it and now I'm getting paid to do it so it's like this is sweet I feel like it's a good it incentivizes creators to post quality content and continue yeah like using the app so it keeps the going and it's kind of a win-win for everyone and now I'm a big believer that see it's so funny like people hate they like hate on TikTok so much and I'm like it's literally so great like you can tell that algorithm whatever you want it to do like you can basically train the algorithm to like educate you on all different types of topics you're interested in and show you people that you never would see before like pilots of fighter jets I love fighter jet TikTok like seeing the behind the scenes of like them putting on their suits and flying the jets and showing you how

they do everything like these are worlds that you never have access to and there's something super like personal about watching a TikTok from like other people's point of view where it's like wow you know like this is cool like we have so many cool things at our fingertips and like like I said again with the deck of cards like everyone has a different deck of cards right a different life path and I think it's really fun to follow and like learn about what other people do because you'll never like I'll never be in the military I'll never be a fighter pilot but like you know I can peek into it peek into that world or what's like another thing I like a lot of psychology stuff therapy stuff obviously because I'm just like I'm really interested in it

and I didn't say this when I mentioned my dad earlier but like I've been training for these conversations like I have been like I found myself on the phone call what was it on what's day Friday we called each other on like Tuesday I found myself like during a monologue I made during one of my times to talk where I said my piece and said what I wanted to say I was like this is exactly the same stuff I talk about on my podcast and I'm like this is crazy it's like I it was so I was so fluent I was so well versed I was so like like on point and I feel like I've repeated the same kind of like the same themes for so long now like three years that it's almost four this will be my fourth year actually holy shit in September um where you know I've basically

like worked out all of my like core values and beliefs and ideas about how people should you know be in a relationship and like what the like correct and not not there's like a there is a right and wrong on how to act you know like there's like a anyways so I was like really I was like damn I've been training for this and um I feel like maybe I'll help him you know maybe I think maybe we'll learn from each other and I'll probably teach him a lot um because I I look at the last 10 years of having this like weird relationship with my dad is like there's just so many lessons there's so many things that I've had epiphanies about um with myself and how I act and just like how you know he operates and like I see it in the world now and it's really clear to

me what's going on and I don't know like I'm sure you know I talk about these things all the time on my show like how to be a good person how to be uh how to work on your emotional intelligence your self-awareness and what that even means and one of the major like my number one how did we get here by the way was i talking about the fair fuck um tiktok i think i was talking about um no but one of the biggest things that i preach on here is 100 personal accountability like like it's so and and you step one with everything is awareness if you have no awareness to begin with and you're not and you're in denial and you have no being aware is like that's hard for some people or it's like you would think like oh how do they not see that or how do they not know that

about themselves and like some people like straight up are they just don't they might may never but being 100% accountable there's so when you admit to your fault and if you and you apologize and you're aware of your behavior and you're like I'm working on this and I know this isn't good and I know this hurts you and I know that is free that is how you access freedom in this life like that is like personal freedom like mental freedom like no one has anything on you you're constantly in the state of like improving and working on yourself and being aware of your behavior so you don't repeat it and hurt people and it's this like constant muscle you work and it's not something you pretend like it isn't there and it you don't have problems like I hate that being

stubborn and being and those are the worst people like we all know them and it's it sucks because you're just like this could this doesn't have to be like this if you were just a little more self-aware and you swallowed your pride and your ego about your behavior and you could fucking you know like grow up um those people like act like toddlers and it's so annoying because you're just like how do they not get it but some people don't and everyone has a separate set of tools in their toolbox and some people never learn and they're, they have these blocks. And, um, so yeah, I'm so about like accountability as you know, and I've preached it so much, but like, um, anyways, so yeah, the fair we'll get in. Oh, I talked about the skunk, the neighbors, um, tech talk. I do have

the dog park update so this is so great this is one take I love these episodes it's like most of them are but like this is a oh I did something oh I did something oh I did something um I'm not a name dropper I hate name droppers I think it's annoying and I don't like you'll never guess or like maybe you'll guess but like I'll never say who it is basically I had sent a dm a like a complimentary dm to a dare I say the biggest podcast host in the world that was too obvious am I talking about that person maybe maybe not a very prominent someone I look up to and highly respect in the podcasting community I sent like a complimentary DM to and I for some reason over the years have been able to

get a hold of this person and they respond to me and so I long story short I made him laugh twice I got a lot of hot ha ha ha ha ha's and responses and um not like a lot of responses but I fangirled and I and I got left on scene and I was like fuck why'd I do that you know but I I had to do it I was like I had to say what I wanted to say and and like put it out there in the universe because it was like a really, I just felt like I have nothing to lose. You know, they're going to read it. They don't have to respond. I don't expect a response, but like I did that. And I was like, kind of like after the fact, I was like, why did I fucking do that? Damn it. Fuck. You know, when you're like, Oh, that's cringy. I can't undo that. It's like, Oh, I don't, I'm not a fan

girl. I hate when like, like if I ever see a celebrity, I'm going to be like, I don't know who that is. Like, I don't fucking, I'm not gonna, I don't know. I just don't want to like, I just don't want to be like that there's like a way to do it that's classy and and calm and like not annoying and so anyways that happened and I'm like still like you know when you have like after you talk like you know after like you fight with someone or you like have a conversation on the phone like you're thinking about oh what I would have said differently or done differently like you can't undo it you know that's kind of where I'm at like I'm still thinking about it I'm like, I feel weird, but it is a cool thing. I'm always like, what does this mean? Like that's so

cool. Um, but I do have a dog park update. So Louie got attacked by a Malinois Malinois. Is that how you say it? Those police dogs. Oh my God. It finally happened. I had to let my boy, I had to let my boy go. I had to let him go. I had to let him fly. I had to, I had to let him go because this man if you didn't know we have an English bulldog named Louie he's a two-year-old bulldog with a big personality and an obsession with balls like I have never met a dog more obsessed with round objects like it doesn't have to just be a ball like literally the dryer balls and the dryer like every time I open the dryer he you hear his little toes his little toenails you know coming down the hallway and he's in that laundry room looking at those dryer balls okay round

pillows around any round object he's his eyes go completely black full dilation and he's locked on and he'll do whatever he'll he'll get the eventually he'll get it in his mouth like he'll do anything to get that ball in his get those balls in his mouth okay now this is a problem we go when we go to the dog park okay by the way this is a new segment this the dog park segment so this is a problem we go to the dog park because you know naturally there's a lot of balls there a lot of dogs there and he thinks that all the balls belong to him and he's very possessive of all of the balls the second he sees a dog playing with a ball he has to go get it you know he can't like i'll be throwing him a ball and he'll see like another dog has a ball

and he's like I want that one and so like he steals them he like it's bad like we I was playing with him for a while and this guy was like hey can we get our ball back it's like shit you know so the other thing about Louie is that he I don't think has ever been he's never gotten checked like he's never gotten roughed up at the dog park like when I took I took Jimmy to the dog park when he was like three months old or maybe a little older than that I don't know and I remember meeting someone and they're like you're not gonna like this it's gonna suck but there's a chance that a dog will like check him and I don't I don't really know what that means that like it's basically like they'll rough them up and then they'll be on their way but it's like a initiation

thing or it just a dog has to go through that apparently to like know their place and how to like I don't know and I don't I haven't done my research on it but like that's kind of what I was told and so I know I've witnessed it with like puppies before that go there um anyways I don't think that ever happened to Louie now he is such an asshole in the dog park like he just he's so first of all he's like not an aggressive dog he's not a mean dog he never he never does that right like he's never you'll never pet him where you're like oh I'm scared no never he's a sweetie pie like all all love he's a big you know lover boy and at the dog park though like he posts up on all the dogs like every every single dog that comes over to him he just like

like wants to fight every single dog I so this happens and I'll tell you about the Malinois but god the other day it was like the last week or the week before I I out of nowhere you know I saw a German Shepherd that was like in the middle of the dog park and Louie and I were playing with a ball and I think the German Shepherd had a ball probably had to have a ball for Louie to do this and I saw Louie I have a video of it like lock on it was like a it was like a fucking it was like a lion on a gazelle like he was like he made eye contact with that or he he saw that ball he saw that German Shepherd and he went full sprint like a hundred yards at this thing and like head butted him

and started going like going crazy at him like like got in a dog fight with this German Shepherd this little German Shepherd was a big one actually cowered and like was scared of Louie and I thought that dog I because you know Germans are protectors you know they're gonna they're you know that's the breed and I was assuming like oh my god this is going to be so bad he's going to get hurt like oh my god oh my god and no that Louie made him scared and he was like cowering and he like was like kept looking back at Louie and and ran away and I felt so bad like I find myself like constantly like apologizing and it's like is he a problem with the dog park probably should we take him there honestly as long as we kind of stay in

our own corner with our own ball like he's fine it's really not that bad and making it sound probably worse than it is but he's aggressive and I think it's because he thinks he can do whatever he wants and he's never been checked before until the Malinois okay so I'll speed up to this so we're back at the dog park and I do this thing where I like put him on the leash when we walk in and I kind of like feel it out with him a little bit just to like see what's around and I don't let him just go because he'll immediately oh my god if I open that gate and just let him run, he'll just immediately chase down a dog or he'll just like immediately look for the ball and go crazy. So kind of have to like warm them up. Um, anyways, we're in like the middle

of the, and I'm always scanning for like certain breeds, like, okay, do we have any pit bulls here? Any German shepherds, any Rottweilers, any, uh, Malinois, there's always like a lot of Malinois was there um it's like very military here in San Diego so like maybe that's why um but and they're always super well trained I've never met one that's like scared like the the one that like fucked up Louie was actually like one of the sweet I was just like damn his disposition is like Jimmy like he didn't scare me at all but anyways he's playing with his owner the Malinois they're he's jumping super high it's always fun to watch that they jump so high you know going after a tennis ball and anyways we we were off to the side playing and the German or not the German the

Malinois goes after a ball jumps up for it and fucking Louis sees the ball goes over to him and it was like the second I saw them nose to nose I'm like this is fucking over I'm like oh my god I'm going to watch Louie get killed. Like, I know these dogs are like vicious, you know, I'm like, Oh fuck. And you don't, the one thing about dogs, you do not break up a fight. Like you do not get in between that. It's better. You're going to lose a finger and an eye. It's not good. I don't, I don't want those scars to, I don't want to have that story to tell like, Oh, one time I, you know, like, I'm sorry. I'm just too vain and too, no, but like, you just don't do that. Like, I mean, I had, I had my, I was on the phone with my mom

talking about stuff. I think we were talking about like wedding planning and i'm sure she thought like something terrible happened because i was like i threw the phone at them so basically they're nose to nose and within like a split second they were fighting like really bad and the malinois got on top of louis there was no like screeching like you know like crying sounds it was just all like rage and the owner had to like run over and he's like oh and i was i threw my cell phone at them as like a reaction i was like fuck what do i do i was like Louie I was like screaming at him and I'm so shooken up because I'm like this Malinois like it's like it's kind of scared me you know and I'm like how is this gonna end and honestly I've been

to the dog park a million times usually they just like fight it out for like 10 seconds and then it's over the only thing you want to work look for obviously are like bites and blood and honestly like Louie was unscathed and the owner was like yeah he if he does this he just gets on top of them and you know goes crazy but he's not he didn't like hurt him louie was louie didn't even it was and then jimmy comes over and like sniffs the malinois and like he was like so scared of him um i was just so shooken up like the adrenaline of like oh my god oh my god my baby's getting like hurt i'm like oh my god oh my god and but but i was also like i'm is this gonna change him probably not like he has such a short memory he's probably just not even like he probably doesn't

even remember that even happened, but, um, I guess that's a good thing for him to get checked and messed up like that by a bigger dog. Cause it's like initiation. It felt, it felt like, yeah, you're earning your stripes out here. You got to get, it's like joining a gang. You got to get your first fight or whatever. What's that thing with gangs? They beat you up as initiation, right like they yeah i'm pretty sure it's like you get beat up so all right that's the dog park update i literally have zero plans for my 30th because i'm assuming that cory's doing something for me because like i don't know i'm just not i've never been a birthday person and something i want to change in my 30s is like like being more enthusiastic maybe is the word like being

more I don't know though because I'm like why am I trying to change who I am I'm learning this like the older I get the more I'm like I'm not like set in my ways but I'm like I I don't want to keep I don't want to should myself and be like oh I should be more like enthusiastic and happy about my birthdays and like excited to have a party like I'm just just not me you know um I think I keep going back to my therapist she always goes it's not good or bad it's just different and it's just like everyone has their but I get it it can be annoying I think for people because they're like aren't you excited you're turning 30 I'm like I don't know I'm not really I'm honestly like I feel like everyone says like you're worried about turning or you're so like oh my god I'm

turning 30 and then you turn 30 and you're like this is the greatest shit ever which I already feel like I'm in my pro like I'm literally I mean once again I'm pretty sure yeah like it happened three times this morning Corey just looks to me don't you just love our life like aren't you so I'm like I was just gonna say that like we literally have like every single day we're just like so grateful so happy we talk about it constantly we we take a moment to smell the roses and like soak in our life and what we're doing and it's like it's a fucking dream like literally I'm living a dream life and it's, it's like, it's just so good. That's the thing. It's just so healthy, good, happy, fun, funny. We're just, it's great. And so yeah, I'm not like in my thirties,

I'm going to make a big change and I'm going to do this. It's like not one of those things where no. Um, but yeah, my thirtieth is coming up. I'm just looking at my list here and then we want to do this ADHD test because I'm just so curious what my results are. um I wrote down high thoughts because oh my god okay I told you guys that Corey and I like go in phases with with weed and I told you how I think this was last episode how we were like driving around looking for a consignment store and we like drove up to the weed shop instead on accident and we're like oh we're here and we might as well so we went through our edibles so those are over and that was a good time and I like edibles they don't I just don't like smoking like I don't

um oh my god I'm lying to you I had okay I literally for the first time in I think it's been over two years yesterday was like I miss my vape I miss nicotine I miss having that vice that getting that fix from like the hit of a fucking puff bar thing or whatever I used what ones did I used to like those tube shaped ones. Like I, I had like a split second or I was like, Oh, I miss this. And then I was like, in my head, I was like, Oh my God, should I just like temporarily get back to vaping because like the wedding and like, maybe like that'll help me with like, like shredding and losing weight and not being, I don't know. I'm like, cause honestly I'm starting Monday, right? Like diet starts Monday. Like literally I've been so shy and like, I don't like being, I've never

wanted to be a creator or like a content person or just anyone online who's like talking and it's obviously because I've had a past with like eating stuff and disorder eating disorders and body image stuff so I'm like the last thing I want to do is make my brand about like I'm on this diet and I'm doing this thing and here's my update today and here's my progress pic and here's my food and here I just never but honestly I'm like look I have 12 weeks until my wedding like why not like I really I'm kind of like what's it called like like shutting off that stupid chatter in my brain because I'm like it's good content it's interesting I like watching other people's fitness stuff and like what they're up to so like I don't know um but yeah like

literally Monday I'm like I have these goals that I want to achieve by the wedding and it's mostly like perfect skin like I'm just so like oh my god what if I have like a zit or like you know I just really want my skin to be like 10 out of 10 on my wedding day and then my body 10 out of like to me I'm definitely one of those people or I know what it's like to hear someone say like oh I want to like lose five pounds or I want to lose weight and they're and you look at them and you're like the fuck I know I'm one of those people like I'm not you know I'm not packing around too much extra but like I do have I've honestly like let myself go no I'm like um it's just the style of working out that I want to switch up like I told you yoga Pilates more of that less

of the lifting and then once again I go to the gym this morning no sleep doing a heavy leg day and killing it because that's my favorite thing ever so it's like really hard to not do that but without telling you anything about my dress something I learned when I just did my try on when I, it, it finally like my, the order came in and I tried on my dress. Like one thing I learned is that we have, if I wanted to, we could, the ass could get fatter. I want to be the lower body's fine. Like I don't have to worry about the lower body. It's the upper body that I'm more like worried, not like worried about, but I just have like a little goal with my upper back and you know, my shoulders and my decollete. Like I just want it to look a certain way

in photos. So that starts Monday. And so what's that? I will be vaping again and losing the weight that way because kidding. It's not weird. I had like this thought. I was like, wait, I missed my vape. It's so bad. It's so bad. Um, oh yeah. Speaking of, oh yeah, I had a high thought. That's what I was going to get into. We have this really good weed. I don't even know what it's called I don't know we we got two joints okay cool am I talking about like smoking weed on my podcast like a grandma right now like we have two joints and edibles anyways we got this and it's so good like it's one of the better strains I've ever had I don't really it's like a hybrid whatever but I had a high thought and I wrote it down that San Diego needs a lazy river I don't know where

I just feel like San Diego, I wrote San Diego needs a lazy river. And that's, that's that on that. Like, I'd have nothing to add. I just feel like, like, where could it go? Maybe, but I'm talking like throughout like Pacific beach or something like it. I think if I was building a city, Oh my God. And like California, like we're taught and nice. Like I would, can you imagine you're just like floating around the city. Like it's an hour and a half ride, you know, and it just goes everywhere and it's going in between the stores and by the water. And I don't know if he's so sweet. You just get on a floaty and go, why not? You know, they have those. I think the last time I was on, I was in a lazy river, I think was in Vegas at Mandalay Bay.

I think that's like the last, yeah, they're just a vibe. Like when you go to the water park and lazy river like it's a vibe like um not to sound like mike malak that's like a core memory of mike mike matt magelick malak come on guys you know i'm impulsive uh impulsive uh co-host friends with logan mike malak you know fifth vital come on anyways that's like a core memory from the back in the day when you would talk about lazy rivers on the podcast all the time it was like what's with that what's with that but i'm just i had this high thought i'm like yeah that would be kind of sweet just somewhere i know we're getting top golf i think next year they're putting in two top golf locations which is gonna be so sick all right let's do i guess is this the

adhd segment this entire episode was like all over the place you know what i mean but i just wanted to hang i i'm like i got this laundry pile to take care of i gotta honestly clean my office here it's like so so i've been doing this thing where because like this is my office like like no one really sees it i've been getting lazy speaking of lazy rivers like when i clean if there's like extra clutter and shit of mine that's like kind of laying around i just like throw it in my office and then i shut the door instead of like putting it away or being organized and so now I'm like looking all this random stuff like golf tees like I took all this stuff out of my golf bag just like on my desk um just paperwork

mail I have like pillows in here that I need to like put pillowcases on just cords and stuff so I'm like I really want to get my office organized today but I'm like the sun the sun i want to tan it's like all i care about right now is just being tan and being in the sun and enjoying my summer and making tiktoks and all right let's take this adhd test now i haven't taken this before so i'm not quite sure where it's gonna take me on this journey when i answer the questions but we're gonna find out together i just took a look at my instagram story uh as one does not weird. Don't act like that's weird. We, how many times a day do you watch your Instagram story? I probably watch it. Thanks for asking. I probably, I'll probably watch my own

story like three or four times. So that doesn't seem like that crazy. Maybe like three times. I don't know. It's just like you get on autopilot with your thumb. Your thumb just goes on autopilot. You open your iPhone and it's just like, it's just already, it's so crazy how that happens. And you're just like tapping around on your Instagram. You're just story, story, stories. You're looking at yourself and then you look at other people and then you're back to your profile and then back to the feed and then you're on the discover page. And oh my God, my discover page right now, I think, you know how people are like, oh my God, at your funeral, like they'll read your Google history or whatever. Like, what's that thing about if someone read your Google

search history that'd be like the worst thing ever mine is god forbid i look at that search bar or that search button on my instagram publicly like if like i was in the sauna on my phone and i was like just you know on autopilot like i was just like wilding out on my instagram wilding out on my instagram and i like went to that search section i was like this girl's a little too close for comfort we're gonna not we're not gonna we're gonna get off this take your guesses send me a dm what do you think's in there because I guess I'll give you hints it's like I can't give hints it's gonna be too like obvious but

I feel like my search section my discover page on Instagram is like not what you think and it's like kind of just yeah we're just gonna leave it at that um anyways adhd test should i go live on tiktok right now while i take this i've never gone live shit why not i'm getting paid to go live now might as well how do i go live this is like real time. You try me figuring out how do you go live? You go to the camera and then you just like, like you press the plus. Hmm. How do people go live? It was not funny. I'm like such a grandma right now. I'm like, I don't know how to do you go to, Oh, live. Oh, sorry. Stay with me.

TikTok shops trying to like make me look at it right now and I don't want to claim offer I don't want this how do I exit out how annoying is this sorry so other people are alive now how do I go live we'll find we'll figure this out maybe for another date okay I figured it out but I'm on camera now and I look like shit uh hi TikTok I'm just going to pay attention to my computer here. We're doing an ADHD test. Come join me. Pulling it up here. This is breeze-wellbeing.com slash ADHD test. So we're just going to take the test. I'm doing this because I don't know. I'm just curious to be honest. Like I feel like over the years, I've read a lot about how women, like a lot of women get undiagnosed and then they find out when

they're like 30 or in their thirties that they have it. And I don't know, it doesn't matter or like, will it change anything? Probably not. I don't know. I just, to me, like I said, I'm all about like self-awareness and knowing why you are the way you are. And so it's just like another way to learn about myself and you know, because literally there's so much going on in my brain all the time and it's a lot and I'm just like what yeah what is this um and I'm not I don't know I'm not very wait are people joining how many am I oh my god it's weird people just come through I guess when you scroll on TikTok you just like see people and they're just like oh you see their live for two seconds. You keep scrolling. Okay. So select your gender. Is that what it was? Yeah.

So male prefer not to say. So take test. Which gender do you identify with? Uh, female. Sure. Select your age, 26 to 30. Am I recording? if you're new I say that once an episode so um yeah we're recording select your age 26 to 30 that would be me do you experience race people want to invite me invite to join live this is my first live if you're watching I've never done this um but I'm monetized on TikTok now so I might as well I guess um I look so bad I'm wearing a Metallica t-shirt do people just like I don't know I I used to go on Instagram live I hated myself for that but I haven't done a live stream in like over two years my brother brother thinks I should twitch stream he's like

you could literally talk for eight hours no problem like just do twitch um I am podcasting cool. I'm like, I'm going to address you guys listening right now and not my Tik TOK, but like, they're just going to witness this ADHD test with you. Um, do you experience racing thoughts during your period or PMS? No, not like specifically. No, this is by the way, this is an ADHD test specifically for women. So I'm sure it's going to have a lot of questions like this. Um, um, like female oriented questions. How often do you experience brain fog or difficulty with memory and recall all the time? I feel like constant, I'm all, I always have brain fog or no, I can't, I'm going to say all the time. I feel like it's, it's something where I'm like,

why I'm always tired. So one of the biggest reasons, reason is that reasons I'm doing this, by the way, is because I like take so many naps. Like I cannot go through a day without taking a nap. So anyways, all the time. Have you ever had someone say to you, you have great potential if only you were to apply more effort? Fucking every day with my podcast, every single person I talk to about my podcast and because like I have almost 400 episodes in three years and they're like oh my god you're killing it and I'm like I've never done any marketing for it I never promote it I just make it and I post it and I just you know that you know that I feel like I have to tell TikTok here because they've probably never listened to my podcast I know I've told you guys this all

the time but it's one of those things where yeah every day people are like you could do so much they're like in shock they're like you should be doing so much more of that more than you're doing you have so much potential so what's the question have you ever heard someone say to you you have great potential potential if only you were to apply more effort yes i've heard that a lot did you know female symptoms are often misdiagnosed and mistreated since most adhd research is male focused i didn't know that wow they're already processing my results after three questions. At Breeze, we get that women's ADHD journey is unique. Okay. Blah, blah, blah, blah. How often do you put off or delay the start of a task that requires a lot of thought?

All the time. So my thing is like, I'm not proactive. Like if I need to make appointments or get errands done, or it's always like the errands like the car stuff or like going to the getting like going to UPS and returning something or like I don't know though because I honestly the wedding planning stuff is really bringing this out in me I'm like I'm just not like I feel like the energy a lot of people have that like maybe it's like the type a type of energy I feel like I'm more like type be. I'm not like the energy is so like, today's a new day and this is my to-do list. And we're going to do it. We're going to knock this off. We're going to do this and this and this,

and we're just going to get shit done. And I'm like all about like, how do I feel about it? You know? And I know that's not how you should live your life. Like, I know we're not supposed to live our lives like that, but like, I'm being honest. I have to be honest. That's the only thing I know. I'm like, I can't not, I don't know how to be a liar. Honestly, this podcast is like, it's a safe place. Um, yeah, I take action based off of feelings and not because I know I'm better and I should just do it anyways. Um, what's it called? Like logic or no, whatever. So yeah, I put off tasks, but see, it's like, I have my, I have my, um, areas where I'm super on my on point and then other areas that I don't excel in where I'm like always behind and I'm always like

you know delaying the task and I'm procrastinating it but then with other things like it's never an issue so I don't know what that is so I'm just gonna put all the time in your spare time you often there's like boxes to check here you often struggle to unwind and relax impulsively switch from one activity to the other feel a strong urge to move around take pleasure in solitary hobbies feel a sense of calm and relaxation or other in my spare time struggle to unwind and relax I mean I just told you that literally all I've been doing this week is relaxing on my deck in the sun but like I said I said I can't just do that without working on my phone and I said you'll never catch me reading a book like I always have to be working when I'm

relaxing if that makes sense like especially like during the day during a weekday like on the weekends it's different but like because I work from home because I do content and because I'm I like put myself on a clock where I'm like it's a weekday you're working but you can so I feel like I do struggle to unwind and relax even on the weekends I feel like I have to clean the house I have to do I have to go do an errand or like be productive um I don't honestly like I remember having lazy days as a kid like being in middle school like just coming home from yeah coming him from school on the bus making top ramen our parents were probably still at work and we're just like home alone watching Arthur and like all the PBS kids shows and just like relaxing and there's

like maybe I had homework but see I would procrastinate I wouldn't do my homework until like 10 p.m I don't know I don't remember but like you would just relax and you don't have a phone super nice and that feeling of like I can actually sit and watch these shows and eat my top ramen and I don't have responsibilities to think about was so nice I so yeah I do struggle to unwind and relax um impulsively switch from one activity to another I feel like I'm the opposite I feel like I hyper fixate I like I do like the task I get going on a task the wrong task I shouldn't be doing like I I prioritize things all backwards that's my issue too I don't do things in the right order that's the thing I like I feel like eventually everything gets done but the way I go

about it is not again it's based off of like what do I feel like doing right now so um I'm just gonna say no to that one feel a strong urge to move around yes it's hard for me to be idle take pleasure in solitary hobbies absolutely podcasting by myself in my office alone fuck yeah um feel a sense of calm and relaxation in my spare time it says do you feel a sense of calm and relaxation yeah because I've said this before like I love my own company as you can tell hi but I do feel when I don't have to manage any other people or any other energy it's like so I could just like be with myself that's like yeah it's very relaxing I feel like everyone feels that way okay I'm gonna go next here what do I put for

other choose as many as you need okay I'm just gonna go next I don't know how long this is by the way we could be here for another hour but I don't think my podcast is gonna hit two hours today. So we're sitting pretty here. Um, all right. How challenging do you find it to sit still, especially when expected during meetings or classes? See, that's not me. No, this isn't like the hyperact. I feel like this isn't hyper. That's hyperactive. The thing with me. Okay. This is again, why I'm taking this test. And I remember I was talking to my therapist and she's like, it's not she's like well okay so i diagnose you and you have adhd now what like what's that going to do for you you're now you're gonna have a label and a diagnosis and i get it like again i'm again

i'm not like searching for a diagnosis and i want to have like a badge to wear now about myself but i notice when i podcast and again this is one take and i'm just like non-stop talking coming up with things to say and it's like not an issue for me and i i love it and it's like i literally press record and my brain goes zero to a hundred and i talk a mile a minute and it's effortless it's so fun and i'm like what is that does that just mean i have a very i think i've heard it before described as like a hyperactive brain or like i know it's a it's like my creative outlet so like i just naturally it's like i enjoy it it flows because this is my creativity i guess but like is there more to it i don't know and when i was talking to my dad and he's like yeah

I have a photographic memory, this, that, and the other. And I wanted to talk and I asked him about his brain. I don't know what I'm going to hear on her next phone call, but I feel like he's going to tell me some like crazy shit about his mind. Cause like, I definitely get it from him. Like the, it's like a quest, like this podcast is like a quest. I just have all these like doors that I'm opening and talking about. And then I like shut them and then I go to the next one. And then I, it's so fun. Um, next question. How do you feel about the following statement? I often feel a strong urge to take action even when unnecessary. Fuck no. Taking, taking action when, even when it's not necessary.

What's the point of that? Like you don't have to take action. So why would you wait? Is it like being a leader and and taking the first step and what is this what is this referring to it applies to me I feel like this often it rarely happens to me I can't relate to this I often feel a strong urge to take action even when unnecessary strong urge to take action no that's just too much that's just too much I'm like less is more like when someone like there's always that person in a group like it's like the group project thing right in school like someone's like they take the charge they're planning everything and they're just like on top of their shit and then they're like delegating

tasks to everyone. I want the tasks to be delegated to me. So I would say it happens to me sometimes like it just depends on the situation. I feel like that's the answer to everything. Like it just depends what the situation is, but I'd say it's more rare than often. So I'm just going to say it rarely happens. I'm trying to think of a scenario when I feel like that, like I got, I have to take action even if it's not necessary that's like so fucking annoying though sometimes like that's like doing the most it's like that's like I hate when things and people are just too much it's like do less we're not asking for this like like sit down you know like those to me like those kinds of people like piss me off it's just like overkill and um I'm asking wait it says

invite to join live if you're new i'm this is my first live on tiktok and i'm doing an adhd test and i'm also podcasting this is my i'm doing my podcast it comes out every friday cool um how often do you find yourself so focused that you tune out everything around you oof yeah me popping the cyst in my armpits warning wait it hurts so bad right now it hurts so bad wait i mean that's like a good example of when i hyper fixate on something and i get locked in and i just like six hours could go by and I'd still be poking that fucker with a needle and just like draining it. And just like, if I'm, Oh my God, the worst thing about smoking now, like now that

we've been doing that for, I feel like the last, like what, like three weeks we've been getting high like every night. Okay, cool. Hi. It's not crazy to say, but, um, the worst thing is like, like I told you for the wedding, all I want is perfect skin, like flawless skin. That's my number one dream for myself as a bride like perfect skin right and I cannot be getting high because like I'll be in front of my magnifying mirror for and I feel like time just goes by slower when you're stoned so like that's probably what I'm I'm probably like making this seem longer than it is but I will sit there and stare at every fucking pore on my face and just like go in and then I it was so bad I like I like scarred myself the other day I'm like I scarred myself on my jawline

like why did I do that I like my nails are sharp and I like so the question is how often do you find yourself so focused that you tune out everything around you it happens all the time so I guess I could put all the time first of all like podcasting I do that when I get on the microphone everything else doesn't matter except this me and you right now in this moment it's gonna be our first dance song Aerosmith I'm pretty sure we're gonna do Aerosmith I could stay awake just to hear you breathing is anyone commenting on this there's just people coming in because I feel like they're scrolling like they're scrolling and they're just like seeing a live and they're like what's this I should probably put like a

a label like come hang with me on my podcast and do an ADHD test but cool um yeah I think we're gonna do Aerosmith or something like that are you supposed to say your first dance song before the wedding. I don't know. But, um, I'd say I tune everything out. Yeah. I'm going to say all the time. So I have the ability to folk. That's the thing. So we're doing the age ADHD test. Right. And that's the whole point of this. But like, I do have the ability to focus. I really do. I mean, I think the best example is the show obviously. And like popping zits. No, but if I'm really interested in what I'm doing there's no issue with the focus it's just the boring shit the stuff I don't want to do where I'm like like at work oh my god I'm so

happy I got fired I'm like I'm like so happy because I would literally be so fucking bored and just like over it and like I couldn't I do my spreadsheet for like two minutes I'd be like fuck and then I have to like literally just go to a I would have to like go clean something and then come back to it to like reset my brain because I could not I cannot just sit and do because it was boring because it was boring but here I am working hi I'm working I'm doing my podcast that's my profession hi and I'll say you're I could do this for 10 hours right like no issue like I do this and I'm there so I'm focused so I have the ability to focus so I'm going to just say I already answered it all the time next question do you tend to interrupt others

or finish their sentences before they're done speaking no I don't I I've listened to too many like self-development podcasts and like I don't know business podcasts and what kinds of just where like they talk about communication tips and things and the number one thing that everyone repeats is like don't um make the conversation all about you like when someone's like oh I did this one time don't be like oh I did it too and you know don't do that so like I consciously when I talk to people I'm like always considering like their point of view and being in the conversation with me and I want to give them space and like time to say their thing and and like I do I feel like I, yeah. So I don't cut people. What's the question? I don't interrupt. Sometimes if I'm

like, even when I was going out with my dad on the phone the other day, I was like, he was talking and I was consciously thinking while he was kind of like going in hard, I was consciously like, like, okay, let him talk, bite your tongue. Like just let it happen. Let it happen. Absorb this, like listen to what he's saying. And then it's your turn. And I had to work, but you have to work on that. Some people like, I feel like when I talk to girls in the sauna, it's like, just like ping pong, like back and forth. Then everyone's like, yeah, you know, talking a hundred miles an hour. And it's like, everyone's cutting each other off and saying, yeah, me too. Me too. Everyone's agreeing with each. That's how women are. I feel like when you're talking to your

girlfriends, it's different. But anyways, the answer for this question is no. I think we're halfway through the test. Um, so how hard do you find it to carry out plans with, with friends? like dude this is my this is my flaw this is my crossed bear in this life this is like my it's so dumb it's so dumb but the whole friends thing is like why can't I figure this out but it's the whole taking action thing like taking action that first step for me there's some sort of block and I talked about this last week like it's not even hard to send a text it's not even hard to ask someone to hang out or or any of that it's not hard like the task the action of doing it is not hard but what is that wall stopping me like what even is it's such bs and

I feel like when I talk to Corey about it because we talk about like you know me and my social life all the time um he's like it's just like a muscle you have to work like you're so out of practice like you're not you're just comfortable like you're in the you're in um what's it called the flow of life or the routine of life and you're not it it doesn't ruin your life that you're not like whisked away every weekend with 17 girlfriends doing something with them and like constantly you know being blown up by texts and calls and facetimes by a bunch of girls like it doesn't ruin your life and so like don't should yourself just recognize that you just have to work the muscle and you're just not really, it's not like part of your agenda. Like you just don't

think about it. So how the question is, how hard do you find it to carry out plans with friends? Extremely hard. I can't believe you have to answer it that way. Hold on. Do you tend to, do you tend to avoid social situations because they are overwhelming or anxiety provoking. God damn it. Do I, what do I do? I feel like, no, because this is the truth. This is the truth. When I'm social, when I'm at the party, when I'm, when I'm, when I'm at the event, I'm on, I'm great. I'm extroverted. I'm having a good time. I'm talking to everyone. Everyone's talking to me. It's like a good time. There's no like block about socializing because every time I do it, it's a great time and I'm having fun. So I don't think I can answer this

um as yes because I never feel anxiety I don't have social anxiety I think the having a usually I go to things with Corey though so like having him as a buffer helps so those are the events where I'm like super like no social anxiety but like I went to this thing this like opening party thing for and I went by myself and I didn't know anyone there and it was kind of clunky like I didn't really enjoy myself because I didn't know anyone it was just kind of clunky you know but I'm just gonna say do I tend to avoid social situations I'm just gonna say yes because when I'm alone it's more like that um how do you feel about the following statement um I often struggle to wait my turn when it's required during a conversation or activity

no, no, I'm not like sitting there, like waiting to talk. Like, I know that might sound insane or like, like you might think I'm that type of person. Who's like, just all I care about is what I have to say. And I want to hear the sound of my own voice. Cause like literally that's my passion is podcasting. And let's see in the sound of my voice and my headphones for two hours a week. Um, but truly like, I'm not sitting there like waiting, like, like, I can't wait to talk. No, unless I have like a really good thought. That's like, I don't know. I'm just going to say I, it rarely happens to me. Here we go. Um, next, the next phase of the test is called wellbeing. So we just did behavior.

This is the final section or the, I think there's one more section after this, but this is the wellbeing section. Uh, do you have any trouble sleeping or suffer from sleep disorders? No. How do you feel about the following statement? I often struggle with low energy or fatigue, even around, even after a good night's sleep. Yes, this is me. It applies to me always, always tired. Always. Have you ever experienced any of the following mental health conditions? Oh, fuck. Oh shit. Here we go. All right. Start your engines. Depression. Check. Anxiety. Check. bipolar disorder not that i know of ocd check ptsd check seasonal effect disorder check i feel like the last one has never had such experiences if you answer that

you are god's favorite like you god bless you know like you're i just got a crazy brain and a lot of trauma handed to me regarding your sexual desire over the past few months. Holy. Okay. We're going here. Um, okay. It's either hot over the last two months. You have an unusually high sex drive, have lost all interest in sexual activity or have a normal level of sexual desire. I'm going to say I have a normal level. Nothing is making me go, Hmm. How often do you feel restless or fidgety? I don't fidget. Never. That's the hyperactive thing. I don't have it. Never fidgety. No. How much time are you willing to dedicate to a personalized plan to improve

your wellbeing? This is, I think at the end of this test, they're going to like send me something in my email and then I can like get help or whatever. Like it'll sign me. It'll, I'm going to get my results and then you can like take a next step. um what are all these things popping up in my life like I'm so intrigued by this how much time are you willing to dedicate to a person okay um I'll just say six months because that's a max and I'm always willing to work on my well-being and improve myself um here's some like info while you're while you take this test they like pop up things you can read the national library of medicine published a study stating that approximately 366.3 million

adults worldwide have symptomatic adhd by the way none of this surprises me like i'm just again curious about it and especially when it comes to myself and how i act the cdc and prevention the center for disease the cdc let me just sum it up the cdc found that 60 percent of children adhd had at least one additional mental emotional behavioral disorder yeah well that tracks you know i've got all kinds of other bs you know it's like past like i have stuff now that i'm still obviously working through personally like my just my stuff but like it's all past I don't like to still talk about it because it's like it's done you know like I said me and Corey are just like chilling right now we're so happy we're just like every day's like a mind

fuck how good it is so um except just like a little wedding stress in the past month have you experienced strong in the past month have you experienced strong negative emotions in reaction to minor setbacks so minor setbacks setback happens do I have strong yeah well I had my like whiny negative biatch phase for like a good six months there and then I just had to call my dad and then I was like then I went viral on tiktok and then everything's better now. So like, I feel like my conclusion is that I had all this like bottled up stuff about my dad that was making me like super negative and like whiny and complaining and in glass half empty. And that was like over the, like I said, the last six months. And then

I've recognized that. And so now I'm just like being so grateful all the time and just like remembering positive things and just snapping out of it. Cause I think that's, I used to not be able to do that by the way it would turn into like the it would just be over consuming and then i would just be like i'm a piece of shit i hate myself and spiral and then you know um but like literally i got fired and i had no emotion i was like thank god i was just happy um which was kind of i i did plan that in a way so it wasn't a shock at all in the past month have you experienced strong negative emotions in reaction to minor setbacks? I'm trying to think of a minor setback. Have I had minor setbacks? Um, one of them is very justified

though. One of my reactions to something negative that happened, which I've never talked about publicly and I never will. That was justified. Um, it was hard. I think it was really a hard time for me and I totally reacted how I, how most people would have. So I don't think that was a strong negative emotion. Like Corey hung up the fucking, did I tell this story? I don't know if I've said it before, but Corey hung up the vacuum, the new Dyson the wrong way. And I like went postal. I like, but the thing is, is he did it the right way. So it was one of those things where like, I was just in a bad, I was just in a bad mood. I don't know. Like we never, like, by the way it's like not like we fought or anything but I just I was being so like just

complaining and just like and but that whole time he did it right but I had in my head he did it wrong and I was so mad at him for doing it because it was my vacuum that I bought for us that I was so excited about the new cordless Dyson vacuum I was so excited then he hung it up in the garage and I was actually mostly mad about the fact he put a nail in the new wall in the garage and I was like you did it wrong and now we're gonna have a hole in the wall but yet when I searched it on Google and I'm literally sitting in the car talking about it in the gym parking garage and I'm just sitting there we're just like going back and forth about this we're just going over the stupid vacuum conversation like over and over for it was just going nowhere and it was stupid

um I just repeated myself twice but I'm literally on Google images and I was trying to find a picture of like the right way to do it and like the entire time I was just I was just scrolling and it was how he did it and I like couldn't admit that I was like I can't admit that you did it right and I was being so stubborn and so like after like I apologized and I told him I was like he's like let me guess you're sitting there on google images while we were having this conversation and all of the pictures were exactly the way I did it I was like you got me so I'm just gonna say that I haven't in the past month had negative strong negative emotions to minor setbacks except for that one time and that was beyond a month ago so the answer is no so it's processing my assessment

oh we have a few more questions and then i think it gives you my results have any of your family members been diagnosed with adhd or other mental health conditions yes depression definitely anxiety definitely would you describe yourself as highly sensitive to loud noises and bright lights who isn't not highly sensitive. Like I was bopping at Luke. Like I was in like those pipes, those, those speakers at Luke Holmes are so loud. I was having a grand old time. Like obviously like loud noises that are unexpected. Sure. I feel like I'm not sensitive. Bright lights. No, I'm just going to say no. Um, okay. It's still processing. I think it's going to ask me another question

or it's developing your personalized plan. I just want to read like, what do the results say to enter your email, explore results, huh? Oh, you won't be charged. wait what does the top say you have a you have moderate adhd assessment okay so physical symptoms low my physical symptoms are rated low can manifest as anxiety depression or mood swings so that's low so which i've worked on so this is a positive because those are the things that those are the physical symptoms that's how this podcast even started that was when I was at my rock bottom right and I like figured it out on the on this show but so that's that's positive so like that area is low great physical psychological symptoms high

such as chronic fatigue insomnia or unexplained physical pain it's honestly just the always tired thing behavioral symptoms high can include flashbacks nightmares or persistent thoughts about a traumatic event i do have a lot of nightmares and intrusive dark thoughts all the time like just fucked up shit just comes in my mind and i don't know why and yeah um impact on your life is also high trust issues fear of abandonment or struggles with intimacy and boundaries. Yeah, that sounds like me. We're prepared to personalize your plans, your empower your healing journey. Sign up for a trial. Okay, well, so I'm just scrolling here. says you are here day 180 productive okay so adhd affects your life negatively it says

based on your responses we've calculated your approximate adhd level most disturbing adhd symptoms you may have uh it says delayed action hi yes that is me uh you may grapple with procrastination off often postponing tasks and responsibilities elusive memory forgetfulness seems to be a reoccurring theme causing occasional disruptions in your daily life the thing is I feel like I always know what I need to do like I always know what is on the to-do list I always have I'm very organized in my brain like I know everything it's never like oh I totally blew that off and forgot ever but it's the taking action on it that part is the where I get

tripped up emotion. The other symptom that's negative or disturbing is emotional roller coaster roller coaster. Mood swings are part of your emotional landscape, which could lead to feelings of frustration and instability. Yeah. Like I'm a cancer it's cancer season. I'm a double cancer um I'm an emotional person like but I'm like I think it's like I I talked about this a lot about being in a long-term committed relationship partnership getting married to someone like this is the first time in my life and also just like going through these new chapters of you know getting engaged buying a house planning a wedding getting fired turning 30 all this stuff it forces you this relationship has forced me to go deep and

like confront all of these things because I used to be like you know living my life whisking around and I didn't have to think about anything like this but now that I'm living with another person and we have these deep talks and conversations stuff comes up and a lot of times I end crying and and like having an emotional fucking moment because it's heavy it's surfacing you know and it's a healthy um release obviously and it's really good for us to like talk it out like that and he's been so good good with me on you know just he's been so great at like helping me with it all and there's really not a lot there it's mostly like like I said the dad stuff and just like just honestly like this whole like ADHD I feel like it's all it's all it

all comes back to this bullshit where like I feel like I should be so much more my progress should be so much further than it actually is and I but then I'm so but the other issue is I'm so hard on myself because most people like I feel like like I have been podcasting for almost this is year four I feel like I'm just getting started. Like literally I'm like, Oh, I have, this is episode three 76. I feel like it's, I'm just scratching the surface of getting started. So like my bar for like where I should be is so high. And then I, so I have high expectations and then I don't meet them every day. And I think what my therapist tells me is that sets you up for failure because the more you just like wake up every day, go through the day and you don't hit those

high expectations and high and those goals like it's gonna affect your self-perception and your like esteem and your and that's gonna so you want to have wins even if it's small and that's something that I've had to like make peace with about myself there are a lot of days where I'll get like one major thing done like the whole day went by and you know it would be like it's Thursday. I got to go to the DMV and you know, I got my car. I drove 30 minutes to the DMV. I sat at the DMV for a couple hours. I was there and then I drove home. Like, that's it. I'm done. Like, I'm not going to go. And like, like some of those days where it's like, you just, you get the, the major elephant done and it's like, that's good enough. Yet you had 15 things

on your to-do list that day. So I've kind of accepted that like, that is a win. That is progress. That's better than not doing anything. And so like focus on that and don't be so hard on yourself and don't have these crazy high expectations. Cause I think that's the issue. I just like overfill my plate. And I'm like, I'm so stressed out. It's like, you don't have to be like you're choosing to me like you're choosing to overfill your plate like so I'm like I guess the new thing I'm doing is recognizing my wins and recognizing like oh I did this day and this day and this day and I do a so I do so much throughout the day if I logged everything I do it's like you're getting a lot done you're doing a lot but it never feels like a lot and I don't

know if it ever will and I don't know if that's just like a trait of being I don't know like what's that trait what kind of people have that trait to me I feel like a lot of successful people do and I identify as a successful hi I'm Jacqueline and I identify as a successful person like you have that imposter thing a little bit or you have that like never satisfied with yourself thing you're always trying to improve yourself and so it's healthy but it can it can backfire if you're not conscious of it. So anyways, what's the other thing? 88% of users with the same results reported enhanced focus and reduce impulsivity after addressing these concerns. Now it's asking me for a credit card. Okay. All right. This is where we just calmly check the X in the corner

tab here and say thank you to breeze well-being for putting together this adhd test for me it's honestly like here's the thing this is like i knew this would happen it's like i take this and i gotta end the episode and put on and lather my body in coconut oil because it's actually kind of overcast right now but like the sun's gonna break through any second i want to be out there when it does um and get this episode out i just knew this was gonna happen I'm going to take this stupid ADHD test. It's going to tell me like, you have symptoms of ADHD and I'm going to be like, I already knew that all this stuff you're telling me, I already know about myself. So taking action is the, uh, what is that? I think it's like an identity thing. God

damn it we're gonna spiral now we're just gonna fucking go into a hole like you know how I made that analogy like oh there's people out there that are super type a and like go go go and they wake up every day and they're like I'm gonna do this this this and this it's like maybe if I just embodied that and woke up and I was like I'm gonna fucking kill my to-do list today I'm gonna do it all I'm gonna maybe that would actually happen but I don't think in that way like I don't it exhausts me like that shit here's the thing though this is the thing back to being comfortable and back to doing what I feel like doing just the thought of being that type a like literally just triggered me and I'm like

I'm exhausted already like I'm just like already annoyed because it's like for what what am I doing this for you know like what's the point you know oh because I want to have I want to be more successful than I am now yes so I guess that's how you become successful you have to like do what you're not doing and change it up but one of some something I'm kind of struggling with right now to be honest is like I feel like I like I know better but I'm not doing better if that makes sense and so maybe I'm looking at looking forward to this like 12 weeks before the wedding time to like I don't know really flex my discipline muscle and like do better instead of just like doing the same things all the time I'm not being very I'm being so vague but um

yeah but again again again give yourself grace I think we all do this to to to ourselves where you're like setting the bar so high for yourself every day and you're not meeting it. And then you're like, but in reality, you're doing just fine. You're doing just fine. And I'm honestly, at the end of the end of the day, um, really proud of myself. I, I know I can't knock myself. Like I, I just, you know, I think I've, I fucking, I've created something nice for myself here that's all I have to say um next episode is how to create your reality dream reality how did I do it though like really how did I do it I think my 20s was all about you know I'm turning 30 so let's do a end of the episode reflection and we'll literally

we'll dip for real and I'm not gonna say we're gonna end the episode 10 times and then actually do it but um my 20s was all about yeah like working on myself I just here's the thing my mom and sister listen to my episode every single week it's so funny like they'll call me they're like oh I just listened to your episode it was so I like this part and they like give me notes but it's so true like I do not want to go into my 30s talking about the same stupid themes of my 20s like not that they're stupid but like I've exhausted the mental health stuff like I've exhausted the self-improvement self-development self-awareness self-accountability like I've exhausted I've told my story a hundred million different times in different ways and I've

and I'm just like what is my 30s I want to like create a new like like show here in my 30s like I'm not gonna like do anything crazy but you know like switch it up a little bit because this is tired this is tired you know one thing I love about reddit snark is uh I read snark on other people's podcasts for research purposes and I recognize that a lot of people a lot of listeners to podcasts say things like oh their show's getting tired or like this they're this is this theme or this um topic's getting tired like as a content creator you have to like you have to evolve at some point and so I don't know I'm like looking at turning 30 is like a pivot time like what am I gonna do I do bangs do I what do I do you know um but seriously like

I'm proud of my I'm proud of where I'm at I think I've I don't look but I'm not I have no regrets my 20s no regrets I think I've lived like 10 different lives I've had so many different chapters of and cool stories and cool things happen where yeah I'm not going into 30 like this is a new beginning and I'm going to be a new person no no like I've done the work I'm turning 30 and I feel good about where I'm at in life and I think I'm lucky to say that and I know I'm lucky to say that because like I said everyone has a different deck of cards and I think a lot of people in my generation in my age are struggling and this is a fucking hard time and it's wild to them to see oh someone else my age is like buying their first home and getting married and planning

a wedding and blah blah and it's like I don't know how that feels to see someone doing what you want to be doing because I'm doing what I want to be doing you know like that sucks I bet that sucks so but I've been there the thing is is I can I have the biggest heart in the world and I have so much empathy for that because I've been there where you're like when am I gonna figure it out when is it going to happen for me like when am I going to arrive and live my dreams and do it all and and how it's like I don't know like maybe I that's my thing is I could teach people how to do but it starts and ends in the mind and that's why like I I don't have any regrets in my 20s or no I'm saying like I know I've exhausted the mental health stuff here but like it's so

important and this is like chapter one of this podcast like first three years is chapter one and then it's like turn 30 we're gonna talk about I don't fucking know like what else I mean this is like not I feel like this is dumb but like are there podcasts on like I know there's like drama channels you know like people talk about like internet drama all the time on their shows but like i would love to break down reddit snark and do like a juicy like segment on like like influencers and like what people are saying about them because like there's a community of people i recognize on reddit who are like super normal everyday joes they're not like trying to be famous on instagram they're just like

they're consumers of content consumers that are not the creator they're the consumer they're the audience they're watching it and I just think it's so interesting because when you read about their raw thoughts and opinions on these influencers it's like it really paints this picture like this picture of reality versus Instagram versus reality right and I think that's such an just where so many people are doing things online and it's like oh it's just same shit different day and then people are like that's insane. But yet the person has, they're oblivious. They have no clue. They don't even, or maybe they're in on it. Maybe they're doing it for the attention. But, um, I think it's a good

tie in with how I feel about, or just like my natural curiosity about human behavior and just like how, um, interesting I find like psychology stuff and why people are the way they are. Um, how did I get here I'm like damn did I like maybe it's just because I I was trying to understand my dad better my whole 20s no like I think a piece of it is that like you're just trying to get answers and so you're searching and you read stuff and you're you know thank god for like the holistic psychologists and all of these books out there that like really break down like but I'd be when I say this I'd be so honestly or so like this is the truth it's time to go clearly it's time to go I'm yawning but um it doesn't rule my life like I

talk about it here I I'm curious about it it's like this is a very um it's a good outlet for me to deep dive into this stuff but it's not like day-to-day I'm just like why is this why is this person the way they are why did it like I don't think about my like I don't spiral about I'm not like non-stop thinking about this kind of stuff if that makes sense um I think it's really helpful though whenever I'm confronted or whenever someone comes to me with like a a like a relationship question or like an issue or like a person issue they're dealing with like a person that's being a shithead or something like I feel like this podcast and just like what I've worked out here like by myself has it's just really nice to talk to people now because I feel like I come with all

this like good um information and I can help them and so I'm like I'm like that just made me feel good about myself wait that just made me feel good about myself I needed that oh am I gonna cry because I'm like I love myself do you ever like tell yourself you love yourself and you like want to cry. Cause it's like, it's just me and you bitch. Like, this is it. Like me, my life, the microphone, like, this is it. You know, we all end up, we, no one like just you and that's it. Um, no, but it's a good feeling. I needed that because I feel like I'm helping you here on my podcast and then I like helped in in real life IRL in the you know out in the streets in the field I'm like helping people too so it's like a good thing all around

I don't feel like this is for nothing you know sometimes it's easy as like a content creator to like um or podcast host or whatever you want to call me influencer I don't fucking care um you feel like oh this is stupid this is nonsense like why am i just like spitting into the abyss all my like opinions and thoughts and ideas that are just all like who like just stupid shit but there's a moral of the story at the end of the day we'll have fun here we'll fuck around and then there's always like a good feeling at the end so where we all learn something and um anyways that's it thanks for hanging out thanks for being here please hit that subscribe button

wherever you're listening right now i'm on apple spotify google podcast stitcher breaker overcast wherever you listen to podcasts please hit that subscribe button put on an episode every friday friday episodes i like friday episodes uh subscribe to my youtube channel the jacqueline monroe show follow me on tiktok jacqueline on tiktok instagram jacqueline monroe and finally if you want to support the show patreon.com slash tjms it's five dollars a month if you want to join my patreon patreon.com slash t j m s what else what am I going to do now clean or tan you know it's like this is what I hate about the summer like the sun I just like I hate being in it's I feel like I'm if I'm inside doing stuff like working cleaning doing anything inside when it's

a hot sunny day I'm like this is affecting my hotness like I need to like I need to be because like I said hair hair tan nails right h t n and I need to make like a little thing about that hair tan nails right so tan tan is a huge thing being tan uh it's core value number two of being a hot girl like you so I like feel like I gotta capitalize on this moment we're getting like we're having this heat wave like we've got all this sunshine so um anyways I used to hate oh my god like for example this time last year I was on the spreadsheet right this time it's 11 57 I started this at what 9 28 was it 9 48 how long is that holy shit um I can't Corey that his favorite thing to do to me is like ask me a math question he'll be like what's 42 plus uh 61 or like he'll

ask like hard like I'm just not quick with it and he thinks that it's because I'm bad at math and it's like no I just like need to like you need to give me like 10 seconds to think about this um dude I just went completely brain dead holy shit oh when I when I was working like last summer I was at my old job and I had to like work during yeah, the sun sunny days and it's just like I hate being inside. I hate it. Wait, I wasn't living in this house this time last summer Oh, I do not miss the apartment. So here's the thing we We were in apartment life for like

A long ass time like I was in it. I don't know how long cory was like renting apartments, you know and then I remember last summer we lived it was nice we lived a block from the beach but it was always a thing like if I wanted to go lay out and be tan we didn't have a deck we had no way of tanning at our complex so we had to like walk to the beach which honestly like I'm making it sound bad but it was a chore like it was a chore there's a lot of tourists like people everywhere and it was just like annoying to do that so I love that I can just like open my back

door and like go on my deck and just like be free and just tan and it's one of the things that's making me super happy right now to be honest like because like I always see girls in San Diego and I'm like oh they're so tan they're so tan I'm like I am too a little bit like I do my spray tans and shit most of the year but um it's like when you see a natural tan and I know this is horrible like I'm pale as it is like naturally pale it's not the best for my skin but um I don't know I just love being tan I'm not gonna apologize for that I'm you guys know I'm covering my extremities my head my face uh my hands I wear tanning gloves anyways okay I need to end the episode I did all my plugs um trying to think if I have anything else I think that's it I hope you have a great

weekend uh and I'll talk to you next week all right bye We'll see you next time. you you Thank you.