The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 82- Sexy Teacher Tuesday: Habits Pt. 2

Episode Date: November 25, 2020

Happy Tuesday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic

Hey guys, happy Tuesday. It's episode 82. Welcome back to the show. hi guys what's up it's Jacqueline happy Tuesday two days before Thanksgiving how how's everyone doing out there clap it up for yourself wow you've made it this far in 2020 you're still alive yay okay wow um holy shit it took me 11 months to get my shit together I had this epiphany today that you know while I was deep cleaning my apartment because I'm leaving home for a whole month so I got this place really clean I was like I've gone through it this year I was getting emotional as I'm cleaning this apartment, my isolation, the tough times I spent alone in here.

It's crazy to sit and think about, I'm going to leave this place for a month. And this represents my literal hell at one point in 2020, or a good chunk of my 2020 when I was in depression. So it felt good to clean it today. But anyways, back to you guys. This podcast has nothing to do with me. It's all about you. like put the focus back on you guys congratulations you made it this far you know we're going to the

happy fucking holiday season I've been looking forward to this this whole year I said look I want to get past the election hump I want to get to the holidays where everyone's with family well am I being ignorant to the fact that a lot of people aren't going home because of restrictions and all that bullshit going on with coronavirus still which completely pisses me like at what point does the solution become worse than the problem here? Like this is family time, holidays. We've all been sucked away from family all year. In fact, like I haven't seen anyone since last Thanksgiving. So I'm selfishly hopping on a plane and going home. But anyways, I'm just excited this time has come so we can go into the new year, start fresh, hopefully. But real quick

Before, you know, I know I've got new listeners here probably today. So go ahead and subscribe to the podcast on the Apple Podcast app. Go over to my YouTube channel to watch the video podcast. It'll be on hold until January. While I'm with family, I will not be on YouTube. And then go over to patreon.com slash TJMS if you want to support the show. And get my Patreon exclusive content. So you'll have access to that if you become a subscriber.

So, um, back to let's, let's do this day. Let's do this thing. Episode 82. Let's talk about what I did. I deep cleaned, um, got emo. I've been through it in this, in this bitch. I've been through it in this apartment with myself and I'm really proud of the progress I've made. You know, I want to talk to you guys right off the bat. We're going to get into teacher Tuesday. I'm going to do a second part to James Clear's Atomic Habits book. I did the first part last Tuesday where I went over some, the first like half of the book and read it quotes and talked about how it applies to my life and maybe how it would help you. So I'll be getting into that heavy hitting teacher Tuesday section in a little bit, but I want to start off with

the topic of my personal progress this year and then happiness and what I've had this epiphany about or the epiphany I made or had, fuck, had made, I make epiphanies. It's an epiphany recipe. I just made it today in my head. Thoughts are, it's just a little ingredients coming together and you have a boom epiphany. So that happened to me today about happiness and this podcast and it's insane. So real quick, I'm standing here November 24th, a different person. Like I feel like a whole new woman. I can't even tell you guys how good it feels to be sitting here right now and basking in this moment because I figured my shit out. I figured everything out. That's like holding me back. Everything that I've struggled with, I've fully addressed, talked it out,

gotten therapy for like working on it. I'm not looking back and I'm not, um, I'm not creating stories I'm not overthinking anymore that's the biggest I think I don't remember I was like what what episode fucking like 58 I wish I remembered the number I literally worked out that epiphany on the podcast and I said overthinking and um getting distracted by new ideas constantly not committing to anything is holding me back so I committed to this podcast and it's making me happier than I've ever been. So boom, there's the little, uh, thought of the day, but here's something I wrote. I'm going to read it to you. I haven't read a lot of notes lately on my phone, but I used to take a lot and I recite them. But anyways, and by the way, Hey,

I got some listeners out there. They're, they're showing up every day, hoping to God I throw some fucking heat, flavor, fuckery, nonsense talk your way. And this is not that style of episode. This is teacher Tuesday. I'm wearing glasses. I'm nerding out. I'm talking about mental health, happiness, that kind of shit in, in, in my style. Okay. I'll try to keep it entertaining for y'all. You know what? Should I fucking talk about cleaning my toilet today first? Would that help you out? Why do I assume that you guys don't want to hear about my happiness? You want to hear about my day because I didn't do a life update I'm going to do this happiness thing and then I'll get into cleaning the toilet because I had a great time so I wrote this for episode 82 I said

I said now I know that I now I know what real happiness is there are zero doubts fears or negative talk involved I said I love this I'm doing this my dream is to be a daily podcaster every day feels like the Super Bowl I have my family I have a job that enables me to work anywhere and I'm doing my dream creative hobby I have my health I have a great lifestyle that all that makes me happy I don't think I can get any more happy than that I said I don't have a huge goal down the road because desire always ruins my happiness I want this to feel the same no matter what level I get to my ego isn't involved at all I'm not putting on a facade like I'm happy doing this with barely anyone listening right now

in two months in you know fucking it's not like I'm Joe Rogan okay I'm not at that level but I said no matter what I want this feeling I have this every day feels like the like we summited a mountain on yesterday's episode jokingly on crutches okay but that's what each episode is it's literally like this is as good as it's gonna get Jacqueline no matter what level you get to you're not gonna be any more happy doing a podcast in 10 years than you are now because this feels fucking amazing and I wrote I'm not putting on a facade like I'm happy doing this barely anyone listening it's real because for the first time in my life I'm expressing myself to my fullest potential without judging myself and that feels so good it makes me happy

yeah so it's wild how I think a lot of people and this was inspired by I was watching the latest or I was listening to what's it called impulsive and Mike had mentioned something about he's eaten steak like wagyu three times in a week and he's like holy shit I used to dream about this now I have it and it's kind of bland this doesn't really phase me anymore it doesn't excite me anymore and I made a decision in that moment when I listened to that I shut it off and I pulled up my phone and wrote a note about what I just exactly what I just read to you because I made a decision in that moment that I never want that to happen to me no matter what level

I get to doesn't matter I want to I've realized with this show and this in this passion this hobby, I found that, that initial feeling I got, I'm sitting in the same place I first recorded this, with my bullshit Apple iPhone headphones, like, with a little microphone, like people do on TikTok, I'm sitting in the same spot, and now I'm 82 episodes in, and I had that initial, like, butterflies, adrenaline, oh my god, I'm, I'm flying, I found my, Jacqueline, this is what you're supposed to do with your life holy shit and I can honestly say that that has sustained that level of fulfillment each episode has it's it's not like I have a goal the reason why I wrote I wrote down I made a decision immediately I said I don't have a goal like a

long-term like in two years I want to have this many downloads and this many subscribers under like that doesn't even exist in my mind because I've talked it out a lot on the show that I've been down on myself a lot in life because I have these lofty dreams and goals that I'm not able to accomplish and that makes me feel like shit about myself so instead of having this desire and this like wish and this wanting thing for my future that hopefully I'll get someday that doesn't even fucking exist because I'm right now I'm doing this I'm at the Super Bowl this is as good as it's going to get. My happiness is probably not going to get any bigger than like, it doesn't, um, it's not, my happiness is not going to depend on numbers, size, growth,

none of that shit because I'm happy literally opening my mouth and pressing record and uploading it. That's end of story. Like that is a, I've boiled everything down to the most simple, um, the simple like the simplest idea that for me to be happy I need to talk a lot okay I need to do a lot of chit chat with myself and have fun with myself because as I've said I've I've been in the past like I feel like a whole new woman now I felt like I kept everything inside and I wasn't expressing myself to my fullest potential and so and I want this for everyone else so maybe here's my teacher Tuesday moment, my life advice. Like once you, I think the key to happiness that I just found this year is literally once you feel like you're not holding anything back, you're not

trying to be something and fit in a box and you're just you a hundred percent, especially on the internet. If you're out there trying to be an internet person, I totally, this is probably preached left and right by so many people that get it. And I feel like I've been watching people my whole life have been sitting back in the crowd being a spectator and those people have figured it out way ahead of me like the Logan Pauls of the world the fucking um who else is a big influencer Gary Vaynerchuk he doesn't he never judged himself he never judged himself since he was like two years old that's what he always talks about that's why he's successful so that the judgment holds you back my judgment myself the judgment I had about my personality how I talk

this sound in my voice all this fucking like how I look it held me back in my 20s so far and I'm like I made a decision no boom not doing it we're not it doesn't exist and as far as happiness goes like this is as good as it's gonna get bitch I don't really think it could get better than this and I mean that and that's not bullshit you guys I hope you know how fun I have on this like because I just I wish everyone could feel this feeling it's it's it's actually crazy to me but now I know what I read the first line I wrote is now I know what real happiness is anyways I had to get that off my chest you want me to talk about cleaning the toilet now so today I cleaned my apartment deep cleaned because I'm leaving for a month

um I want to go back to the old topic about happiness do I want to do I want to do I want to jump to the next segment do do do do do do do clean in my apartment let's do it fuck it um thanks for listening to that monologue I appreciate y'all so I put off my cleaning for a good week okay it started it started to look like a frat house in this bitch I had dishes piled up crumbs all over the floor fucking my toothpaste all over my sink film on my shower tiles and I took care of business day because I'm leaving and I said I'm gonna wait up until the last day to clean so I can do one sweep because I'm leaving for a long time just deal with it at one time so I was exhausted as fuck scrubbing my my my shower tiles took me

about an hour and a half to clean my bathroom because my tiles are so cute and tiny but they are so hard to clean I made an entire I made I you know I was so I was so committed to the process I made a reels. I haven't used Instagram reels really like that much, but I made a reels today of my aesthetically pleasing toilet cleaning and bathroom cleaning session. So go over to Instagram to see that. I fucking like went hard on my tiles. My shoulders almost dislocated. I hurt. I hurt. And I was breathing in that comet and that soft scrub. I do a combo. I do a little trifecta I've got Lysol bleach all-purpose spray okay I don't know why that's the lubrication I don't use water I need something more aggressive than water to get the get the party started so

because I've got these tiles in the shower just imagine this they're all white they all have little grout lines in between them anyways do you guys know what shower tiles look like do you guys fucking know what they look like so anyways I start the party off with my Lysol or I think yeah Lysol doesn't affect and spray shit uh put that all over the shower inhale it a few times just to get I need guys I should have fucking I should have would what kind of drugs would no maybe Adderall what drugs would have made me aggressively clean like something that makes me like is that cocaine I think it's cocaine that's what I should have done I don't know how to do that or where to get it but I think next time I clean my shower I'm gonna need cocaine

because I don't think I can repeat what I just did today. My shoulders aren't going to be able to take it. So I start the party off my Lysol spray. Then I do a dusting of Comet like just all over the floor. I start with the floor and then I squirt over like I do like a hot dog thing like mustard on a hot dog that motion. I do that on top of the Comet powder. It's like this green powder and that's all sitting on top of the Lysol spray. So we've got a concoction happening. We have a chemical reaction about to explode if I don't do things right here so I let that bitch sit for like a minute or two let everything kind of start soaking together and then I just go in I go in until I can't do it any longer and I make it like a workout I make it I just get David

Goggins in my head and I think what would David Goggins do in this moment and then I get it done I just go hard it took me probably 20 minutes to do the floor because the tiles are so fucking tiny and then after I do the floor this is what's bullshit I have to rinse it okay it's not fucking done it's not done then I have to go in and do my I have a little brush like a little Libman it's like the green and white brushes you can buy them at the grocery store they're really easy to find but it goes into the grout so then I have to see the spots I missed and then I have to do detail of those then I have to go around the edges and the corners and get all the there's like yellow gunk which is my conditioner I use that for whatever reason when it dries it turns

into like putty paste that's so it's like the glitter of conditioner like you know when you spill glitter everywhere you can't fucking get rid of it that's how my conditioner is in the shower it's so frustrating so anyways and then guys here guessed it you guessed it then I do round two and I have to you know rinse it again and then I got to do the walls guys there's got to be a better way there's got to be a better way how do you shoot me a dm no no no excuse me i'm sick of that i'm sick of telling you guys dm me leave a review on the apple podcast app any amount of stars i don't give a fuck about the stars i just need this answer how do you clean your shower what is your technique there's got to be another way

a better way i was thinking of getting uh a drill and then putting i think i've seen this before you put a like a rough sponge on the end of it and it spins really fast so you can get aggressive with it and it can i don't know anyway so i did that but guys i have an entire apartment i could talk about cleaning but are we gonna do teacher tuesday am i am i gonna talk about atomic habits the book by james clear maybe we're gonna get there but i could tell you this i uh pre-packed that wasn't on the agenda today that was not on the agenda today but at some point i started getting anxiety and I was like ah shit if I don't start packing now I'm gonna be fucked tomorrow because I leave Thursday I leave on Thanksgiving so I opened my suitcase up I threw all my sweat

pants and sweatshirts in there all my comfy clothes and I decided I'm not bringing anything cute I'm like my mom has cute clothes I'll just use hers so I can bring all the cute sweats and all the you know the fun stuff but um I don't know guys I had a good day cleaning I was tired as shit all day though because it takes the it knocks the wind out of you scrubbing tiles and I started with that task I don't know that was probably a good decision but uh it winded me okay so anyways what else can I fucking tell you I just had dinner guys I'm recording at night whatever don't judge me I remember yesterday I was like I thrive in the morning when I have eight shots of espresso in me and I'm people watching outside on the podcast and I don't know

I get I get wild and I think I'm gonna just become a nighttime podcaster do teachers teach at night that's kind of that's kind of hot I'm teaching you at night just I don't know let's talk about building habits so this section is the part where I'm gonna read the quotes from the chapters that are like key quotes and then I'm gonna talk about them and elaborate about how they've how they apply to my life and maybe something I've learned from it or that you could learn from okay because here's the fucking deal guys okay so let me drink water I haven't drank anything yet you know I'm gonna gargle because this podcast already feels boring that feels good we should gargle water like we should normalize gargling water in at dinner

like after you cheers just cheers okay so the reason I'm doing this is because some episodes I'm like what did I just what kind of value did I bring to my audience today like you know how content creators say that shit I always feel like I leave the episodes going oh like I think I need to at least throw in an educational slash entertaining episode once a week you know so here it is we're going to get into the chapter I think 10 okay so yeah no chapter we left off at chapter 9 yep so we're going to go into chapter 10 so how to find and fix the cause of your bad habits chapter 10 let's get into it so the inversion of the second law of behavior change is to make it unattractive second law of behavior change is to make it unattractive trying to recall

this section of the book so that's the opposite because the first so the second law of behavior changes to make it make it attractive so for the show what's attractive to me about podcasting is what I've described is not only the fact that I'm the face and the name of the show that's so attractive but the fact that I literally simplify the fuck out of it I open my I press record I open my mouth I shut my mouth wait I can do it even more simple than that I press record I talk I stop recording I upload that's it boom done there's no I made it so attractive so anyways and I'm also like chilling I usually have a coffee with me when I'm doing this it's this whole ritual of podcasting is so fucking awesome I am obsessed like I told you guys I

was creating my little universe my little podcast universe in the very very beginning of the show first like 10 episodes I'm like I want to make podcasts you know YouTubers have their sets and their studios with all their makeup collection shit I'm like I want a fucking microphone collection I want cool pieces on my set and not cool lights and mixing boards and like I just want to nerd the fuck out about podcasting and make it this thing because I want more people to do this I think there's space for everyone to be successful here I think it's good for mental health it's free therapy to sit and talk to yourself so and here's the deal it doesn't fucking matter who's listening or how many people the act of doing this I improve I'm being a little

guinea pig on myself for a year here doing it every single day but I'm pretty much at this point convinced that yeah this has drastically improved my mental health and yeah Jacqueline you could also talk to your friends okay same shit hey Jacqueline you could talk to a therapist hey Jacqueline just call your mom it's the same thing talking to someone is healthy duh but I'm also like that I want to be um somebody so you know I gotta fucking put it on the internet post it post it for people listen to get their fucking attention make them even more addicted to social media because they gotta listen to me now I joke I joke I mean there is something inside of me I'm not even talking about this fucking behavioral changes we're gonna get into

it don't worry some people are called you know called like Jesus called like was Jesus called some people are cut out for the biz I think I'm one of them so I have no issue opening my mouth for an hour a day plus sometimes I do an hour and a half almost two hours sometimes no issue doing that no no issue coming up with the content no issue fucking posting it or any of that so I've there's a place for me in this world to be a podcaster and I'm embracing that and yes as a child I was a middle child I think I don't know I was I don't think I was a little attention hoe back in the day but I think I just liked I don't know I like being I like being in front of people I don't know how else to

fucking say it I just like that shit I like it because you know what biggest epiphany and I think this happened in adulthood and new jobs and you know stuffy workplaces I like to be the person in the group that makes everyone else feel like they can take their hair down and just relax and have fun because they're if that person if someone like I come in the group and I if if you're and it's natural like it's not a try hard thing i just do this shit when i'm in new groups of people but i just make joke or i'll fucking play play around with the environment you know talk about something that's on the wall or whatever the fuck and people start feeling a little more relaxed and they're like you know and then i i noticed that it that is an important in in the

world if that's important for uh like social like culture and uh work environments and all that because it just helps the group and you know maybe i'm not the leader maybe i'm not the one maybe i'm not the one just like putting my you know not i'm not bitching at everyone to do their work i'm the one that's like i don't want to work i just want to sit and make people laugh and make people have fun I don't know I used to I used to be the boss I had 15 interns guys at one point each semester a year after college I graduated and I managed 15 interns approximately give or take and I do thrive as a leader in that in that way like delegating tat like I loved having little meetings with my groups. I had marketing interns. I had, um, fucking, who are my other

interns? I had three other ones. I basically taught them how to Photoshop, um, event planners. What's the other two? There's two other ones. Why can't I think event planners, marketing. Anyways, it was fun because I got to bring them into little meetings and I had that first experience being a leader my leadership role my official big girl job leader role they came to me as I'm the boss you know and a fucking name played at my desk and business cards and it was cool but um at the end of the day I would I love that job I like jobs like that where I have I'm an authority i guess but because i i feel like i'm good at that but at the end of the day i want to do what the fuck i'm doing right now this is my dream this is my super bowl i'm here bitch

should i gargle gargle again no i'm not gonna do it that's gross so back to the book why'd i even go on that road Oh, because I had to prove to you guys why I'm doing Teacher Tuesday. Educate, entertain, I don't know. How are you guys doing? This show is about you. It's not about me. Are you feeling educated today?

Okay, so this book's great. Let's get into it. Your habits are modern day solutions to ancient desires. There's the word desires. so let's think of a dumb example your habit let's break this down my habit to do what oh holy fuck dude the egyptians wished they could communicate with people across the land in egypt they desired that that's breaking this down the modern day solution to that

is texting is calling people we did it that's crazy my habit of calling texting is the solution to the Egyptians wishing they could talk to people across the land that's cool that's a dumbed down example but I had fun thinking of that so the cause of your habits is actually the prediction that the credit excuse me the cause of your habits is actually the prediction that precedes them. The prediction leads to a feeling. Okay? Habits are attractive when we associate them with positive feelings

and unattractive when we associate them with negative feelings. Create a motivational ritual by doing something you enjoy immediately before a difficult habit. that's interesting so i'll i'll break that down talk about my life recently i started doing yoga in the morning without my phone i have like my it's my first wave it's my first the wave i ride in the morning i'm not a surfer here in california i'm jealous people that are i wake up and i do yoga it's the second best it's the second best uh option i think here in socal either you're a yogi or you're a surfer and i'm i want to be a hot yoga bitch who goes on the beach someday and

does that when I feel confident about my yoga poses but listen the habit so the create a motivational ritual by doing something you enjoy immediately before a difficult habit it's my shit my favorite thing my my motivational ritual I do before I do yoga in the morning is guess what can you guys guess it drum roll please I make my coffee I make my coffee I make coffee I love my coffee ritual I love waking up and drinking coffee so I know Jacqueline you're gonna sip your coffee slowly because I do yoga and drink coffee at the same time and it's this thing it's like the sun's coming up it's you know I hear you know the nice breeze and the city waking up and I got my coffee down by my yoga mat I'm sipping coffee I'm doing my

morning stretches and it feels so fucking good but it feels um like it's more enjoyable because I have the coffee there because if I didn't drink coffee and do yoga I'd be fine or if I it's like killing two birds with one stone so normally I just sip my coffee and scroll social media like like literally like a psychotic cracked out meth I don't know is I'm cracking meth the same thing I don't know I sit there like a psychopath in the morning checking social media being an idiot getting buzzed on my coffee but now it's like I'm doing yoga which is my goal I want to be a daily a yoga person, but have it part of my lifestyle now, which I'm so committed to. I already did it today. Congratulations, Jacqueline, you're finishing your goals. You're accomplishing your

dreams. Uh, but yeah, I do, I get lit and I do yoga at the same time. It seems like it shouldn't be combined together, but I don't give a fuck. There's people, I know some people drink tea and do yoga. Okay. Some people drink matcha and they do yoga. Some people just don't do caffeine and they, uh, they do yoga. So I'm an extremist. I like shit that doesn't make sense. Hence daily podcasting. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it and something about that might maybe, you know, is that my ego talking here? Maybe there's something apart. No, let me break this bitch down for you. We're going to go back to the atomic habits quotes, but listen to this. I used to live with a person that said to my face in the most like stealthy way that

or like piercing way there's not many people like this in the world he's like I just want to be the best in the world at something and I got chills like I have chills now when it because I still remember when he said this and I got it because I feel like that about myself I'm like not necessarily the best in the world at something but I want to be the best version of myself I want it's like this personal competitive thing now because I said I'm doing it my outstanding unique thing is I do it daily most people do a weekly show I do a daily um but no and like serious honest to god I said this early on I was like all the people I want to be friends with are podcasters so I want to join the

club right I'm like trying to like friend up these motherfuckers so the only thing that's unique about me at this point is the fact I do it every day and so is that incredible is that an is that cool enough is that something to talk about is that because I think a part of me at the beginning was like well it's everyone has a show but like who fucking does it seven days a week you know I'm just telling you guys and here's the thing I tell you literally everything I think I don't care that you guys know that I don't give a fuck because I like doing this I'm not I loved like it'd be weird to take a day off I love this is like my passion my daily ritual now and I don't know but yeah when that guy said I want to be the best of the world something I got it

because I see how that's a different that's a differentiator and people that are uh the best in the world at something and the people that aren't like they it's simple they just want they just want it more and they will work harder they'll outdo everyone they'll stay up later they'll fucking figure it out to get to the top and I like I think I'm drawn and I'm attracted to people like that because in my observation and this doesn't make sense I think my family or you know I I think I struggle um whenever I talk to family members about this my mom especially like it's kind of hard to explain because they don't get it and I look at people in the world that are the one percent the people that are experiencing crazy ass fucking lifestyle the

kevin hart's the world uh you know the top top top celebrities uh actors politicians pop culture people whatever the fuck like people that are rappers you know 50 cent fucking shout out 50 cent episode 50 go listen back if you want to listen to me talk a lot about 50 cent and I'm I'm I'm I don't know if it's a middle child thing I'm an observer I always look around I take notes but I had an early on realization that they're experiencing this life the this one life we have so much differently differently than the rest of us and what is it about them like what do you what how do you do that and that's always been I've always been curious by that because it's crazy to me it's like well like I legitimately think the Kardashian

Jenner family like they're living on another planet than we are there's levels to the shit they're like not even like I have nothing in common with that that family like they're well not that I don't you know the same eyebrows are any or their ass because you know like look at me But, um, hold on a moment of silence, cringe right now with me in three, two, one. Jocko, why'd you say that? So the point of me going here is that I realized that, that, that, that it's different people that are there, it's different for them. And I'm trying to figure out the psychology, how they think, you know, I study a lot of

people that have gotten to that level in life and I think it's cool because it's like when I listen to Kevin Hart's episode on Rogan I think that's what's my top five I just put a top five together I got Alex Jones first of all he bumped out Kevin Hart immediately so I have Alex Jones I'll say Tim Dillon but it was Alex Jones's episode I got uh Kevin Hart oh fuck no Connie did Connie beat out Kevin I'm gonna put Connie after Kevin so Alex Jones Kevin Hart Kanye Elon then David Blaine those are my top five Rogan episodes this year but when I was watching Kevin's episode he was talking about how life's a game and there's levels and

it's like you each year or each day you get a little bit closer like to a new level and you can get yourself drastically closer to the next levels of things in life that you want by surrounding yourself with people that have it that are doing it and that's my biggest takeaway so far in in um I guess business I guess you could say or I'm not like a businesswoman but like I don't you know like that's on my shit but when I worked at a startup company for example I realized that it's about who you know and and what like you can like people you can have people mentor you through the process and that'll eliminate a thousand steps that you would have to figure out yourself so I don't know back to so I've just so that's an observation in itself

Like I was working for this company, seeing how the CEO was acquiring knowledge on how to grow his business and what decisions he should make because the people he was getting advice from were, you know, X their company for like 200 million and they had done it before. So for an example, that's just one example, but, um, and then I think there's this one offs that make it overnight and it's just like, look, but I don't know. I, I study, I think I've always kind of admired and studied the greats out there because I, I'm like, what is that life like? It's very curious to me. I don't know if ever,

I don't think everyone's like this. I think you're either, um, put off by celebrity and status and you're like, you know, you just can't stand it and you're bitter about it or you're curious about, I'm super fucking curious about it. In fact, one of the first jobs I applied for out of college i was gonna move to la i really wanted to and i was gonna work at soho house specifically i think the position i was trying to get was i was gonna work their vips so all the celebrities that go there i was gonna be their like point contact person so yeah i was like really trying to get this fucking job it's like oh you know like that's fucking badass because it's like i don't know people shit on a lot of celebrities and like high status people out there but they're cool as fuck

a lot of them are cool as fuck the coolest people you'll ever meet in the world they're unique they go to the beat of their own drum they're they're full of it you know they express themselves in cool ways they talk about interesting things they you know literally express themselves with singing and and acting and like whatever like comedy and as a human being that's walking the planet i'm looking around i'm like those are the people that i want to be like i want to understand and like like get to know it's interesting I mean no offense to it's not like it's not like we and put yourself in your like get your thoughts brewing about this it's not like we put and maybe it's because you know the media puts out on a pedestal and we're

all thrown you know we're all shown images of concerts and movies and talk shows and so like those people are always in front of our faces not like they're putting you know Bruce from auto parts Napa auto parts on the big screen and showing off him selling nuts and bolts like do they sell those at napa auto parts that's in bolts is like home depot i don't know like new head gaskets what do you buy at napa auto parts i don't know it's not like they it's not like we in society see that see bruce at the napa auto parts or um cindy at the local library on the big screen and we're just like holy shit did you see cindy walking down the street today and we're taking a picture of her fucking outfit there's like paparazzi taking a picture of her

cute outfit she wore to the library today like we don't fucking do that so there's something to be said about there's levels to this shit and human beings have been drawn and and admire and like idolize people that are different that are like doing their own shit creatively especially because that's our that's as a human we're uh we need some sort of level of entertainment to keep us going and stimulus visually you know psychologically emotionally that's why we like movies that's why we like um you know tv shows and we will watch social media because it's visual and it's stimulating and um it lights our brains up we need all that fucking dopamine anyways anyways teacher Tuesday well why did

I go there oh number one at the world guy so and at something yeah I I think I was trying to explain myself here where I've just had it in me from a young age that I don't want to do the average thing I want to be something big I don't know how to explain it and I think a lot of people in entertainment have that they're like yeah I just have that feeling like I'm supposed to do something like that and I think that's what this show is making me realize like hey girl hey hi girl like you're kind of doing it I just saw a post shadow color daddy and this is no shade this is just like what it is she said a reminder on her story Alex Cooper the host um she posted on her story hey guys as a reminder and her format's totally different she does the whole delayed

gratification thing it's not like giving her she doesn't give her audience a show seven days a week like I'm doing it's not better than thing or whatever it just is what it is but I'm like She posted, Hey guys, just remember there's only 40 episodes this year of Call Her Daddy. And I've never felt more like proud of myself and the fact that I'm nobody, I'm fucking Jacqueline Monroe from Washington. Like I don't, uh, you know, I'm not special and like, I don't have some product to give to the world to change it or, you know, like I'm not there yet. Okay.

I don't know if I'll ever be there, but it was cool to sit there and realize, wow, I've done more than double that in two months holy shit and it's not like I said it's not a better her thing is different I've listened to her talk about her show and how she um she she seems to be very very private she doesn't do a lot of interviews but the one I listened to she had explained um how she wants to make her show a show and treat it like like an HBO like I don't know what she exactly said but I understand how the delayed gratification like making her listeners wait a couple weeks builds the you know anticipation I don't know so I just again I felt like wow that's Jacqueline congratulations you did something this year

be proud of yourself so I don't know because I never do that listen that's the thing I here's Teacher Tuesday moment again. Take out your notepad. When you have a moment of success or a period of time, like I'm looking back here, I'm in November, looking back at the year, having these realizations about my life. I'm actually taking a moment to like appreciate this, be grateful for this and be proud of this. Because I think normally, and the fucking podcast every day forces me to because I have to talk about my life. So I don't have to, but I do. So I realized things along the way and that's what I'm doing today. I'm like, holy shit. I figured myself out this year. It's pretty badass. Badass.

Okay. Chapter 11. Let's move on. There's 19 chapters. Let's go through this. I'm not going to get off topic. Promise. Pinky promise. Okay. So chapter 11, walk slowly, but never backward. Okay. So focus on taking action, not being in motion. Habit formation is a process by which a behavior becomes progressively more automatic through repetition. The amount of time you've been performing a habit is not as important as the number of times you have performed it. okay I like this chapter a lot so real quickly focus on the action not being in motion so interesting how do I apply that to this focus on the action not being in motion why don't I understand that clearly all right focus on taking action not being in motion

yeah okay so in motion to me was all my wishy-washy you know thinking before um you know in my 20s so far after college not really having a clear path that was just me being in motion like distracted like getting excited about doing this thing and then getting excited about doing that thing and did at least I was moving forward I was thinking and I was dreaming up my life and you know thinking about my career and all that at least I was in motion but I was spinning like a top so now I feel like the difference is I'm taking action I'm I have a specific goal of daily podcasting and a dream that I've realized that I'm taking action on. So it's a completely different thing. So anyways, um, the amount of time you performed

a habit is not as important as the number of times you have performed it. Okay. Let's fucking break this down, bitch. Where's my water boy. Do you remember when I was going to hire a water boy I also had a recommendation I should get one of those beer hats where you stick I'd stick two um iced coffees on the side and then have straws that come in my mouth dude I just need a feeding tube of caffeine or like just hook me the fuck up to an IV um I know it's quirky to talk about your iced coffee addiction but um and everyone does but I don't give a fuck I I'll I'll never shut up about how much I love coffee I love coffee so the amount of time you've been performing a habit is not as important as the number of times so time length of time

versus number of times so repetitions so the reps are more important than the length of time you've done the done the habit so interesting. So for example, I could do a podcast five minutes a day for seven days a week. And that's better. But the skill, this is about like building a habit and a skill. I got to talk longer than five minutes. I don't know. Let's think of a different example here. The amount of time you've been performing a habit. Why does it seem like it should be easy? I don't fucking know let's think of a habit I want to do oh like brushing my teeth for an hour a day would be bullshit it doesn't you don't need to but if you do it every day and that's the habit

you're trying to build that'll be it'll become autonomous because you repped it out every single day instead of doing it an hour once a week that's the difference I got to put factor in days of the week once a week an hour long to once a week toothbrushing session for an hour is not as important as the number of times you so anyways do it every day for two minutes Jacqueline shut the fuck up should I quit should I fire myself right now chapter 12 the law of least effort the law of least effort human behavior follows the law of least effort we will naturally gravitate toward the option that requires the least amount of work that's why I'm not a YouTube vlogger

literally you guys I'm sitting back right now just let me tell you this so I attempted to YouTube vlogging in the beginning of the year like I guess springtime like basically when the pandemic started and I love editing video don't get me wrong it's so fun to like it's it's like art but when I simplify this bitch down for you earlier and I said I press record I talk I stop recording and I upload that is the definition of creating what is this creating an environment where doing the right thing is as easy as possible or no we will gravitate toward the option that requires the least amount of work I'm more I'm gravitating more to the podcast world than the YouTube vlogging

editing for 18 hours a day world there's a to boil like footage down to 10 minutes and make it entertaining and creative it's takes a lot of effort and time that's why I like the lifestyle of podcasting daily because I literally it takes me I don't want to tell you should I tell you behind the scenes information I'd say post-production is 30 minutes if that like it's quick. That's including YouTube. That's including, uh, posting the links to socials. That's including, uh, getting the bitch uploaded. Like it's literally nothing. So I talk, I post it within 30 minutes. It's seamless. So anyways, um, next thing here is, so we're talking about the law, law of least effort. Reduce the friction associated with good behaviors. When friction

is low, habits are easy. Yeah. Friction, low friction. That's a dumb, dumb example right here, but I roll my yoga mat out. It's all the time. So it's, it's always in front of me. I used to have it. This thing I realized is like, Jacqueline, you never had your yoga mat rolled out. Cause I always roll it up when I'm done back in like the earlier part of the year where I did workouts at home like I don't know like actual intense like YouTube workouts but for a long time like this last the last few months I haven't had it out and so now I just I'm lowering the friction of having to roll it out and find it and put it it takes nothing no effort honestly to do that but seeing it

and making this I'm like priming my environment making the future action of doing yoga so much easier if I already have it out. So chapter 13, let's move on. How to stop procrastinating by using the two minute rule. Oh Jesus Christ. I love a two minute rule. I love a little like, um, cute, like rule. I don't know how, you know, like on people's, it'll be like on social media, people trying to sell you a course. It's like, do this five minute journaling and trying to, you know, make it sound cool. Okay. So I think that's the most faint I've ever done. Why do I do that? Why do I do that? Okay. So chapter 13, how to say we're going to use the two minute rule here. Every day there are a handful of moments that deliver an outsized impact.

James, James Clear, the author, refers to these little choices as decisive moments. Decisive moments set the options available to your future self. A habit must be established before it can be improved. So let's stop here before I move on. Decisive moments set the options available to your future self. Yeah, oh. so the decisive moment which is a thought I did not write this I refuse to write it because every time I write something a goal down this is how my brain works okay I don't recommend following

in my footsteps I sabotage the shit out of myself within minimum two days to two weeks of writing goals on paper every fucking time I don't know why so when I think something like i had the thought i'm going to do a podcast seven days a week and immediately i took action on i set i just i did it took action executed it i made it it was a decisive moment it was a thought that manifested into an actual product an actual like i'm giving the world piece of audio every day and video here back in january go to go over to youtube subscribe to my channel to watch the video podcast. Uh, and so decisive moments, set the options available to your future self is the thing. So, um, set the options available to myself now. How did it do that? I don't really have an

option. I don't have guys. What are my options? Don't do it seven days a week. That doesn't exist in my brain it literally does not I it doesn't exist in my brain I told you jokingly I was like yeah you know what am I gonna do what am I gonna say when I come to the internet if I skip a day yes I got my leg ran over by my mom's tractor at my mom's house sorry it was in the hospital I couldn't record fuck that no I'll be in the hospital bed microphoned up and that is why I do believe I'm going to the big leagues and I'm drowning out these hoes and I think that's that's that would be worthy of a today show appearance morning show appearance an Ellen show like me and my pop star mic getting surgery on my leg mutilated by a tractor wheel

doing a fucking podcast because this is my this is my uh I had a decisive moment I had a decisive thought and I'm an extremist I want to do something amazing with my life and I'm like fuck it figure a way out figure it out I like that I like people that are like that I like the David Goggins of the world I like the uh I just I'm drawn to people that are they're badasses I don't know what it is I think that's why I like a lot of rappers because they just fucking do what they want I love podcasting I love doing this I'm doing what I want I don't give a fuck what anyone says okay should write a rap song about it anyways chapter 13 we're getting there this is a quite a fun episode isn't it so I don't know yeah okay so

let's see here we got another quote okay so this is a two-minute rule the two-minute rule states when you start a new habit it should take less than two minutes to do. Okay. The more you ritualize the beginning of a process, the more likely it becomes that you can slip into the state of deep focus that is required to do great things. Standardize before you optimize. You can't improve a habit that doesn't exist. I like that. So a new habit should take less than two minutes to do when you start so fucking the toothbrush toothbrush example is enough to get me fired jacqueline that was not creative that was not that was bullshit you should be able to think about these

easily great examples for your listeners today as a teacher i just got fired i just got pulled into the principal's office and i was a very bad teacher my neighbors are outside hold on I don't like it when they hear me I think they I don't know who gives a fuck um so the more you ritualize the beginning of a process more okay I'm starting to get annoyed by this book to be honest so I go in and out of liking so this is like counter productive for this episode but like literally do you guys ever feel like this some days I see a motivational inspiring like human optimization type of quote show up on Instagram or whatever and I'm like I fuck with this heavy I'm going to change my life I'm going to go hard

I'm going to like get all my shit together I'm going to clean my house I'm going to make a list I'm going to take a nap I'm going to refresh tomorrow like some days I'm like that and some days I'm just like fuck this two minute rule like I don't want to have to think about I don't want to have to fucking take out a timer and be like do this habit just take less than two minutes is this because if it doesn't it's not going to stick around according to this standardized before you optimize I'm getting annoyed by the the verbiage here as like this is the part of the book where I shut and I don't go back I don't know I have to be real with you sometimes I don't drink all the Kool-Aid. I just drink some of it. And then I'm like, okay, I took what I needed. Time to close

the book and move on. Like you're starting to get the point. Basically, let me bring my two cents into this shit real quick. I think I have a, so I'm highly creative. You know, my perfectionist mindset rules me overrides a lot of the time but I started to learn from observing the opposite brain people like left brain engineers like tech people like the nerds out there that they just do something because it's on they just need that's the it's supposed to get done or like how to explain this they don't draw they don't bring emotions into the equation when they do something like it's actually as a creative it's an epiphany that I need to probably write I should have it out like I need to be reminded of this I should put it on a

a thing on my phone I do alarms throughout the day so I have a reminder about something at each part of the day I used to do positive affirmations every couple hours but I might do something that's like just get it done or don't overthink it or excuse me not overthink it like don't over complicate it um because it's about I think creative minds resist and if you procrastinate because you want it to be perfect like you resist taking action and and you do everything but the task and I've observed the fucking nerds out there I feel like just get it done they're like robotic about it they have no emotion it's like okay so today on the task on the on the agenda I have to go to the like it's me it's like me delaying for fucking eight days to go to UPS

so I had to print I had to print I had to tape my shit I had to decipher which labels went on which packages and it really fucking annoys me to have to do that and when I did the task what was yesterday it took me like under 30 minutes round trip and it was easy like but I resisted because I was like oh I fucking hate doing this I don't make every time I have to package something up I get confused and just stand in line and like I resisted it and I and I delayed a delay delay delay because of the emotion attached to that task. So basically, I think the biggest epiphany I've had recently is just to, it's so much more efficient to delete your emotions when you have basic boring bitch work adult tasks to do. Just do it. And I think that's why a lot of us

millennials and shit we're all just like i've been on my couch i just i'm like scrolling social media i'm depressed i'm just like it's because we sit and stew in our own bullshit about not like we create nothing out of thin air we make everything way worse than it is and uh i don't know that's sad to me because for my life at least because i'm like jacqueline i just i like this has been a tough year like as an adult obviously you know shit's happening in the world but uh you know alone I'm alone but and this is why I started off the show talking about I think I have undiagnosed ADHD because adult 80 like I think it's coming to coming about my 20s ADHD which is a it's a common thing that happens to or like those behaviors I don't want to get

diagnosed and have to get on drugs but the behaviors can show themselves in adults not just kids so um anyways I I feel like as an adult where am I going with this a lot of the shit that I should I should just take care of I don't do like like I've mentioned stuff about my car my mom every time she sees she's like when are you get that fixed like have you changed your oil like are you what's happening and I'm like I don't fucking know like I all my shit's on auto pay like i i'm i always pay my bills and stuff but there's no issues there it's just like stuff that needs to get taken care of i like don't do like right away and i don't know um i'm a human i just like here's the thing i like to i like to have fun i like to do what i

want okay and that's pretty much me like as of late fucking off on social media drinking coffee wearing sweatpants not giving a fuck I don't want to go to UPS fuck that shit okay so chapter 14 how to make good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible fuck there's 19 chapters I'm gonna breeze through these fucking chapters right now because I'm already getting annoyed by this love this book life-changing book I'm not trying to downplay how amazing it is by saying this. I'm just getting exhausted. I'm just like, okay, get the point. Okay, so a commitment device is a choice you make in the present that locks in a better behavior for the future. Okay, the ultimate way to lock in future behavior is to automate your habits.

okay one-time choices like buying a better mattress or enrolling in an automatic savings plan are single actions that automate your future habits and deliver increasing returns over time like buying a better mattress so how does buying a better mattress automate your future habit increasing return why don't i get that you bought a mattress how does it that single action delivers increasing return over returns over time well you could sleep on it every night i guess that's a but i feel like the bet i don't know why don't i get this i feel like a dumb fuck I get it but I don't get it okay so anyways chapter 15 let's just fucking go what moving

forward didn't see that psych I have a college education I'm smart don't fucking come for me uh I feel like the return on your investment from buying a mattress what did it say I just feel like your mattress my brain immediately went like well doesn't your mattresses like wear out and get shittier over time that's like an immediate thought i had chapter 15 their cardinal rule of behavior change the fourth law of behavior change is making it satisfying okay so we're more likely to repeat a behavior when the experience is satisfying okay the human brain evolved to prioritize immediate rewards over delayed rewards

okay dude I just had an epiphany about social media delayed rewards everything's immediate with social media right right we're all addicted to our phones now right we always check it like every two seconds right what if the apps released our notifications

at a time of day like we could pick and that's the only time we could see it and they would accumulate over the day so that way I don't know does that make sense it made sense in my brain or yeah there could be a a lock system I guess that are there things you can put on your apps to lock them so they don't open I don't know I don't think you guys I told you guys this yesterday about my thoughts on social media I don't think it's the apps themselves that suck i think it's the action of grabbing a phone that sucks and that entire

uh piece of like this hardware grabbing a phone is is not it i don't think it's it it's uh that is the i think that is the thing that's shifting culture is us grabbing the apps are bringing us to our phones you could say you could argue that i guess but we wouldn't pick up our phones if we knew that the apps weren't going to be open until fucking I don't know but that's where we do all of our business we have to have them open 24 hours a day because we got emails and fucking texting and dms and I don't know I just I would like to see that shift instead of being compelled to grab your phone that doesn't even exist so what is that thing and where's the money and being in the present moment because there isn't fucking any

there isn't fucking any money in that present moment how do you how do you how do tech companies buy attention people's attention in the present moment should i write that down how do tech companies how do how do companies or where's the money make money off of our attention it's my podcast I'm typing you just sit down

kids I think that's the gold if you wanted to build a company around something that is positive fuck did i just figure something out i don't know so because i'm i'm i'm a i'm i'm at the age where i've seen both sides i've seen pre-psychopath addicted social media world and i've seen uh you know i said pre that and i've seen the what we have now okay what am i saying i used to

make mud pies and play in the dirt okay I didn't have a phone I didn't know what social media was okay I've seen dial-up fucking I've seen that internet I've seen you know okay I got myspace in like seventh grade and that's when my social media usage started and I got grounded for a month but anyway so I've seen both sides so my brain understands that technology isn't going away necessarily but so how do we apply it so it's not going away and it has shifted culture and human like the iphone the social media we live on now has shifted culture and changed human behavior to the point where i i don't know i'm talking i'm talking about myself but i'm sure if you're listening you probably relate to me in some way out there it's making us grab our fucking phones

every two seconds and just stare at shit and it's dividing our attention up into so many different apps and you know things and it's not it's not the best in my opinion forward progression for humanity I don't think this is the best forward step okay if I had to take a step back and say what's the what are we trying to get back to or what do we want to ideally have in a perfect world like what do we want I still want Instagram I still want fucking Twitter I still want you I still want all that shit but I don't want to make it I don't want to I don't want it to feel like I'm in this virtual world when I go to it so how do you what where's the money in the present moment where's the money how do you create product that

makes your present your life experience in the moment as wonderful as the apps where how fucking sad is this fuck this because reality should be but the reality of that is that reality should just be better it is better when you really have conversations and connections with people it's dope as fuck it's the best there's nothing better so i don't know i just think like how do we bridge that gap so we're not grabbing a phone and getting zombied out on our couches with TikTok for five hours a day like how do we I don't know maybe it's I don't know I said talked about glasses yesterday something we put on our

eyes that make things fun that we look at and but see that's not even reality that's not even that's it's like again it's like how do we take a step back and do a little bit less than tapping an app to go into your Instagram like how do we dumb it down so it's I don't fucking know should I try to figure this out right now with myself and not I don't give a fuck how long this i don't edit this i don't care i just want to know like why isn't there one app why isn't there one thing i know there's jacqueline jesus christ it's called competition there's a you know fucking it's like an app war out there it's not like a war but it's like it's a bubble tech stuff

So I guess what I'm saying is if the masses, if we're all collectively on online, we all have an online persona and online avatar of ourselves and online profile information. It's all there on online and we live in a world on our Instagram, on our Twitter, on our YouTube, on TikTok, all that shit, showing off our lives, showing off ourselves. and we're bouncing between apps to do basically the same thing put ourselves out there on the internet in a virtual way why isn't there one thing I think that would be like this is the idealistic you I don't know world where it's like if all the companies could come together and merge and be like we want to put our heads together and create some sort of positive product or that's good for humanity that because people because the internet exists and people do their

online shit so how can we provide them something that isn't tethering doing a tug of war and dividing their attention and then from and it's like that's the shift in humanity where we will this is so fucking trippy like we will literally live in reality in the present moment with virtual representation of who we are in one in one through one lens holy fuck i'm not high guys by the way no drugs on board tonight sober shit on my couch cold actually i need to put socks on yeah how do we see people online through one lens you know there's one like one vessel of social media that everyone in the world it's just like

what we all are on and how people know us virtually i don't know because i actually tweeted that i think like seven fucking years ago popped up the other day i'm like why isn't there one social media app or like one like i don't like bouncing around apps doing the same thing i don't know should i go to the next chapter write a review don't send me a dm about what you think about that section of the podcast the human brain evolved to prioritize immediate rewards over delayed rewards i read that before i went on that tangent and no shit i fucking prioritize my immediate reward of Instagram. Juicy content. I love Instagram. My fucking babe. Delayed rewards. If Instagram

delayed my rewards, delayed my notifications, delayed my, I don't know. That'd be kind of fucked. Chapter six. Let's just move on. How to stick with good habits every day. Oh God, this is my eye roll. This is my eye roll chapter. Fucking how to stick to with good habits every day. I can't take anything fucking seriously. Not even a life-changing book. Oh, Jesus Christ. Okay. So the feeling of making progress is one of the most satisfying feelings. Don't break the chain. Try to keep your habits streak alive. Never miss twice. If you miss one day, try to get back on track as quickly as possible. Just because you can't measure something doesn't mean it's the most important thing. So I love this actually. And I just got annoyed by it,

But now, hey, I love it because it's so true. I think I've established with myself that I'm not consistent. I suck at being consistent with myself about, like, doing tasks that move me closer to my goals. I sabotage. I overthink. I get excited about something else. I get distracted. I'm, like, wishy-washy.

I'm indecisive. and it's not satisfying. So the most satisfying feeling, what I'm realizing now is having a streak. I know it's like that Charlie guy that talks about winning streak, you know, every day, like being a winning streak. Yeah. Don't break the chain. Never miss twice. It's kind of related to, I think I've heard this before about, in terms of fitness, like I never go past two days without working out never miss twice if you miss one day try to get back on track oh well I can't say that 100% you guys know this like I didn't work I didn't work out for a long time this year uh but if you miss one day try to get back on track as quickly as

possible yeah okay let's apply that to diet maybe so like let's say because I know a lot of people are like I even deal where I'll be like I just fucking ate bullshit yesterday so I guess if you eat like shit one day try to get it's just the next day don't and then don't the next it's all about um averages over time when you think about it so that's why people divide their when they when people talk about like what they eat in their diet how they stay healthy and vital they talk about like oh i follow like 80 20 or you know 80 80 percent of time i'm healthy 20 you know 20 percent of time i eat whatever the fuck i want and um anyways it says never miss twice so anyways oh fuck this chapter 17 okay

okay look you know we're 17 how an accountability partner changes everything jesus and then we are less likely to repeat a bad habit if it's painful or unsatisfying okay i'll just go over this quick and accountable you guys know this accountability partner this is like obvious bullshit we care deeply about what others think of us and we do not want others to have lesser opinions of us accountability person will make you do your shit. Cause you don't want them to think like you're a loser. Low key. This is so terrible to admit. Oh fuck. I don't, I'm not influenced by that shit. Honestly. Like I'm the worst. I feel like, I don't know what it is. I can't, it's not that I can't take anything seriously,

but it's like, no, you know, maybe that's, I haven't really done it before. I think I haven't really had, I can't say I've never had someone keeping me accountable, but I just don't like the, I don't like the idea of, um, like having to do something because of someone else. And you're like, the reason you're doing it that day is because you have an accountability person waiting for you like that you have to report to or else you'll feel like or else you'll be uh afraid that they won't think you're as cool as you are or whatever like I don't like that concept because I want to be in control and full I want to have full possession of myself and full possession of the choices I make that aren't

aren't based on anyone but myself I want to have like the 100% responsibility and like the mental energy I put towards a task I don't want to have to I don't want it to be because of someone else thinking less than me if I don't do it it doesn't motivate me exactly because I don't literally and this was probably the root of that is like I don't think that's it's probably a bad thing to say because I'm a you know a former athlete and like yeah you have coaches you have people that help you along the way that's probably positive Jacqueline what the fuck did you just say that for I guess that's ideal for what I just said not needing an accountability person not needing help and I guess that's also because I'm a do-it-myself type of

chick I like don't need no man like I just get shit done I'm like hey fucking I can take care of myself like I can do everything for everyone and you know I don't need her I don't need help and i don't know and maybe my ego i'm like i don't want someone to see me sweat or someone to know i'm struggling so i don't want to fucking have to report to someone and have an accountability person i don't know that's probably it that's cool everyone has a little ego in there somewhere chapter 19 oh my god are we almost done i need to go to bed fuck chapter 19 the goldilocks rule How to stay motivated in life and work. Humans experience peak motivation when working on tasks that are right on the edge of their current abilities.

This is called the Goldilocks zone. As habits become routine, they become less interesting and less satisfying. We get bored. Can't relate. Well, especially for podcasting. i just thought of something let me tell you so when people dream to do something big with their life like be an astronaut be a doctor be a scientist like me i don't know like do something where you're gonna have to go through a lot of

school memorize a lot of shit learn a lot it's gonna be hard i think people like some people thrive with difficult like learning difficult things they thrive they love that that makes them feel alive like they enjoy it they enjoy the fact it's hard it makes them feel good that they understand it after you know years and years of school like that must be really fulfilling for them but I feel like this is so bullshit to say I don't care I'll tell you I'm just like how do I live the most fun easygoing and I just want to like do whatever fuck I want life possible and I think this is it this fucking this or meaning my the thing I dedicate my headspace to every day i'm not deep i'm not balls deep in a quantum physics book

learning about shit that is difficult as fuck because i don't personally get off why am i using sexual references here like i don't find joy struggling my brain like my i don't find joy because I'm like I maybe I'm not like I don't like to say woke and like okay maybe I just have like watched too many fucking conspiracy like like or universe videos maybe it's all the fucking drugs who the fuck knows I just have this understanding that nothing matters and nothing isn't like where everything's like made up and I don't take life very like too seriously and it's very hard for me to read a manual like for example I was working a job I'm not gonna say which I've talked about it before I'm just gonna say I worked

a job where there was training manuals and security videos and things you had to watch you know and I'm just like this is so fucking boring and dry and why I have this one life and I gotta sit through this shit like once you have these thoughts it's hard to exist as a normal person around like I just don't see things like I I ask why a lot and I go I go like this is this is boring it's like why am I what's this it's just this sucks this video is made in the 90s this is this is not how we should live what are we doing I could run this bitch I could make it so fun I could do training videos about security all that it's such a fun way can I rework this bitch for everyone to have so we can have fun here

it's not like life it's here's the thing it's not like I'm not willing to work I've worked my entire like I've never not worked I still work you guys know that I still work I have a job it's amazing but uh there's some jobs I've had where I'm like freaked the fuck out by how people can sit through a career 30 fucking years doing that I'm like there's no awareness of like the insanity of it of it and like the paperwork shit and the fucking i know that's how the world works i just don't really want to play on that playground as an adult i don't want to play on that i don't want to uh go oh jacqueline like you just you know that's the way the world is like just say yes to this job just do it no i quit four fucking jobs in like two years

not because of that at all well the one I just mentioned yes uh it had to do with it wasn't a good fit for Jacqueline I couldn't deal uh and also I was finding something better I needed the sales job I had was ideal because I was able to you know maybe I was it was under the real estate real estate umbrella I was you know with a group of young people my age it was fun we talked all day it was literally all we did is talk and i love that shit and i got to talk to you know people my clients were all you know from all over the world and shit it was cool and that's where i thrive i don't thrive in paperwork and and fucking like dry how to i don't know like type i don't know like i just i'm annoying like that but you should

it's hey at least I have self-awareness because or I'm glad I'm grateful that I'm aware of that and and my psychology in the workplace because I I'm at peace with the fact that some people are cut out for that and some people aren't and I'm not one of them and I don't need to feel ashamed of that I shouldn't feel I think I used to feel weird and different than people like I'd look around you know in meetings and I'm like can I just I just want to like be like why are we on this stuff like why are we making this something why are we gossiping about this it's like bullshit why does this matter like we're not getting closer to the goal here we're not getting I don't know I just think a

lot of things people in the workplace that i've been in it's been a lot of useless uh nonsense that's like i don't know filler it's not productive it's just like office i don't know camaraderie fucking it's all like joe rogan's thing he always talks about the fucking like water cooler talk i don't know what he always says like he's I think I've heard him mention like working a normal job and he's like I can't do it god damn it has he influenced me was I influenced by him in my thinking about this probably I think a lot actually fuck you joking what the fuck uh that's actually weird to admit right now or realize like a lot of my the people that

have influenced the way I think our podcast hosts are like the like the nerds out there like Lex Friedman recently I've just been deep in his podcasts um yeah I think that's good though I think more people should think in alternative ways or just like ask questions about the world because I think that's how it will improve but while I'm learning about the world and myself in my 20s I feel wrong a little bit or I feel guilty about it a little bit like Jacqueline just I don't know my job though like what I actually do is very fulfilling because I realized that I'm using my college degree okay so that's fun yay I love telling my mom that I'm like hey I'm using my fucking degree here okay and it makes me feel like a normal person I'm like

when I talk to other people about my job I'm like it's an actual like job like this is not some alternative weird thing you know it's like this is a legit job and that makes me feel good about myself as a member of society I don't want to live in a tent in the middle of nowhere and like be off the grid like I'm not that my mind isn't that isn't there but um I still have those thoughts I still have those ideas about I guess how people operate in the workplace and it just really rubs me the wrong way I don't know why I don't know why I think I observed so just a background about my upbringing I haven't really mentioned family

in a while but I'll be seeing them in a couple days I feel like my dad was highly creative my mom was not in terms of well she is she's always been in an executive role the boss bitch she's awesome she still is in that type of position but you know man's role her whole life and I learned about working hard that was always preached like we worked so hard as a family not only physical labor but jobs like I watched my mom like my whole life work like a fucking slave to keep us fed and to get us into school and you know same with my dad it's like his situation is a little different but just seeing that and like i watched my dad actually you know i i saw him do what i'm doing now

but older when he's you know midlife because of some changes in his career and i realized like i don't want to be 50 with these thoughts feeling like i'm stuck with a career that is making me operate against the way that I like mentally want to or like you guys know what I mean like it just I want to nip it in the ass now and I think what's awesome is the world now is so different with um especially the there's a great like I guess the startup world is kind of cool there's a lot of jobs that offer amazing work life um you know balance with whatever options fucking the work the workplace is awesome it's super you know fun like the the offices are cool it's it's young it's fun it's hip it's techie it's like it's cool to like work there it doesn't

suck so I guess I'm just thinking of cubicle cubicle shit like boring work I guess scares the fuck out of me but I know I won't be doing that ever like no but I guess I'm trying to understand why people I don't know I shouldn't question it they don't you don't know what you don't know it's what you're exposed to who you listen to what you see on your screen like people some people are fully compliant with that lifestyle in that world and they just don't even think a second thought about it I was working at a publisher shit could I even say this fuck it so I was uh interning at a publisher and book publisher and that's start that's when I started realizing like I don't want to ever be here and like this I don't understand how the I

it wasn't that I don't want to be there it was like I don't understand because I was living so this was out I worked as a publisher so it was the school I went to Washington State University out in the middle of nowhere uh book publisher there I just didn't understand like how are people here happy with what they're like I I guess it's like everything it's like what I'm finding with podcasting it's like it's different strokes for different folks Jacqueline some people live normal like quote-unquote boring average normal lives and they're happy as fuck and they have a family and a house and they maybe live out in the middle of nowhere in in Washington in a college town and they're so excited about that it's hard for me maybe that's what it is

is I am trying I'm like putting my opinions I'm like inflicting on other people are like I'm what is this called projecting I never know the right words someone help me I'm like wishing they I feel like they I'm looking at them and I'm like it seems like your life sucks how do you do you think your life sucks are you cool with this job in this environment in this lifestyle are you having fun is this your dream I just want everyone to live their fucking dreams that's what it is Jacqueline just discovered what she wanted to say I want everyone to live big bold dreams I want everyone to have a fun life where they're lit up inside every day because I think a lot of people are just like lukewarm or just like what's the there's a term for it

you just kind of settle and just like accept and just like go through the motions I have a really overactive brain I don't know why this episode went here is this two hours today it might be I don't know shit you guys know what I mean I think I think a lot and I care about people and so sometimes it hurts to see especially just like fat sad secretaries at the courthouse like that kind of shit I'm just like god damn it i don't know don't you want to be a youtuber why are you at this desk don't you want to go put on makeup me on youtube go live your dream bitch i mean that with love like that's what i mean i just want and i'm assuming like that's the thing is not everyone has my brain everyone

wants to like you know be the center of attention and talk seven days a week I don't know shit it's going on 10 10 p.m. Jesus Christ um okay I'm gonna wrap this bitch up throw it in a throw it in the back of a Honda driveway holy fuck I like to talk I don't know why I said that why did I say that it's a crime podcast this is now true crime this is a crime podcast I'm talking about a kidnapping I gotta hey I'm trying to remember when I caught I was trying to do oh no I didn't try I did a live on a previous episode like a week ago I had a rat slash mouse mouse in house that scared the

fuck out of me it ran across my room and um I set out traps so on the show I lifted I'm sitting where I'm sitting now I got up and I was like look all the top podcasts are crime podcasts okay how do I compete here how do I how do I get to the top charts in the crime category Jacqueline one episode will do it one episode that not a lot of people will hear will do it okay it's not gonna barely anyone's gonna listen to it but somehow it'll it'll rise to the top Jacqueline you're gonna go search for the dead body live on the podcast and I like lifted my fucking couch up looking for the dead mouse slash rat and I was you know narrating it and I had like my fucking one arm lifting my couch one hand on the laptop talking the whole time through it

wrap that bitch up throw her in the back of a honda shit yeah like what's what's going on why do people like listening to that I don't like getting scared I don't like it I don't like I don't like scary movies a lot like I like okay I watch them with boys that that can protect me that's it that's like my only the only time I'm okay with it but alone just like scared like I don't know I did listen to Wrongful Conviction for a while uh with Jason Flom I do like his show about um exonerated the exonerated I don't know what that word means actually criminals wrongly wrongful the fuck Jacqueline wrongful conviction they were convicted wrongfully of crime and they talk about their story it's really good Jacqueline go

a bit. Uh, but yeah, anyways. Okay guys, that's it. That was a long one. I think. Thanks for being here. And I love y'all a lot. I know that's weird, but maybe I'm the only person that told you that I love you. Or what is that saying? Maybe I'm the only person that told you they love you today so I did my best and I mean it so care about y'all a lot hope you're healthy hope your family's doing well have a great Tuesday I don't know I do these at night and I'm like well you're not listening you're not listening to it on Tuesday now okay fucking a uh but yeah just like have a great week with family I'll be here tomorrow so I'll say that again tomorrow but have a great safe travel home for flying home I don't know I'll talk to you

tomorrow guys for Wednesday Wednesday's episode stick around if you're a patron go over to patreon.com slash tjms if you want to support the show and uh yeah that's it wait I just went brain dead fucking a patreon.com slash tjms if you want to support the show everyone gives a shout out everyone gets my exclusive patreon only content and yeah that's it okay i love you guys talk to you tomorrow all right bye hey guys i feel like i've been doing the same shout out forever now and i'm like hello my patrons and i'm annoyed by myself so hi guys what's up how's it going take a seat all right I got four chairs in front of me for four amazing people and making you

famous I'm saying your names seven days a week we got I love how I have four it's perfect got Ricky Jensen in seat number one we're playing musical chairs seat number two we got Trevor Garrett seat number three Eagle One finally seat number four we've got Ozzy Osbourne thanks for your support guys. Thanks for being here. Thanks for, uh, I don't know, just getting me, I guess at this point, if you're, I think you guys, I know, I feel like a lot of you listen daily. So I finally feel accepted by four people. So I just want people to love me. I'm trying to be accepted. I just want that. It's sad. It's sad. Okay. Anyways, I'm joking, but you know what I mean? Okay. I love you guys. Thanks for your support. Talk to you tomorrow. All right. Bye.