The Jacqueline Monroe Show - 91- Spider Played Dead

Episode Date: December 4, 2020

Happy Thursday!! :) Patreon.com/TJMS https://soundcloud.com/robmonmusic

What's up, y'all? It's episode 91. Welcome back to the show. good evening we are live from jacqueline's mom's kitchen on thursday december 4th Excuse me. It's the third. It's my dad's 60th birthday. How did I fuck that up? Welcome back to the show. It's Jacqueline. Let's do a podcast. All right. 91 episodes in 91 days. I feel boring lately. Let's get into it. Let me set the stage. My mom's in bed. Uh, we're getting up. We have an early wake up call tomorrow. We're rolling over the mountains, going over the mountains through the woods to grandmother's to my sister's house. Excuse me. We go, we're going to help her move and it's a big excursion, six hour drive. So we have an early wake up call. My mom's in

bed. I'm out in the kitchen. I've got a big ass cup of water and some whiskey. Okay. I got a little shot of whiskey on the rocks right now. I'm cold. Whenever I'm cold, I like drinking whiskey. It's a nice little warmup, a little warm and fuzzy in my tummy feeling, but yeah, that's what's going on tonight. Uh, let's get into it. Like I said, I feel boring lately. I don't know what to do. I'm like, uh, are you a radio announcer? Do you wake up early in the morning and make this a morning show if you're doing it every day because you keep doing it at night when you're tired and out of juice so what the fuck um I'm gonna just go into detail about my day here's what I want to tell you guys cliff notes or bullet points about today's show we're gonna go into my day

okay we're gonna go into my day my daily vlog this is an audio vlog I'm here seven days a week updating you on my life if you're new I'm gonna go into some thoughts I have about uh being in my 20s moving away and the feedback I'm getting from my mom every day about like potentially moving back to Washington and I feel like anyways I'll get into that and then I don't know what's going on in the world uh my mom and I like briefly watch the news a little bit at night but I don't really know what the fuck's going on uh I want to go check like the daily news whatever like I want to go on the the internet and cruise it with you guys and bring you along and figure out what happened today because I've been working sitting

around doing uh shit for my job all day I haven't really looked at the news so I don't know what to do let's get into it woke up uh oh god oh my god okay wait guys okay I woke up to a very frustrated mother um she had so I had an important phone call this morning right at like the person I'm calling is in the office, uh, for whatever reason from like 6 to 8 AM only. So I emailed her yesterday and I said, I'll call you at 6 30. And my mom thought I said six. So she's pounding on my door. Jacqueline, weren't you going to call it six? Weren't you going to call it six? All right, come on, get up. And I had this intense, like it, it was like, I wasn't, my eyes weren't even open. I hadn't even, my alarm hadn't even gone off and she's pounding on my door. I'm like, this is not

good for my cortisol. Okay. It's shooting up. I'm stressed out. This is fight or flight going too soon in the day. I had a plan and she corrupted it. She gets up at like four fucking AM. God bless her soul. Actually she slept, I think till five yesterday, which is a big deal for her. But yeah, she was already up. She like made croissants. She worked out. I'm like asleep. Anyways, I had an important phone call at six 30. So I roll out of bed. I was so tired. I just I slept hard I feel like you guys don't know this but all of our furniture like my old beds and stuff has been it's like my mom's got it or my sister's using it it's like all gone it's all out of the house we're getting new shit so I'm on a blow-up mattress I haven't even told you

that but yeah I've been sleeping on a blow-up mattress and uh it's been great but like I sleep like it's almost like a hammock because you know blow-up mattresses lose their uh air a little bit and throughout the night it kind of sinks down in the middle and I feel like I'm in a little hammock and then I put like 50 pounds of blankets on top of me really heavy blankets and I feel so nestled and cozy so I slept great woke up to uh my mom freaking me out but it was all good we had a really successful well we had a great phone call you know I'm in my 20s now shit's happening with my life and I have to deal with shit and I'm like thank god I have a mom who's supporting me through all the things I got to learn all the life lessons uh I don't want to go into it it's

not important to discuss but I'm just like growing up and taking care of business and it feels good so then uh my mom had to go she had a couple meetings this morning bright and early and after the phone call she had left and then I sat and worked in her kitchen I kind of cleaned up though I was like what would it be like if I lived here and this was my place and my mom wasn't here and no one was here I would just like I wanted to reorganize and make it how I would want it so I kind of did that for an hour drink coffee did a little bit of yoga I didn't go outside today don't tell my mom but I didn't go outside today um actually I did one time when I took a video of her looking like a hot milf getting in her Porsche and I was like sending it to my sister

because she had sunglasses on she's like getting in the Porsche and it looks she just like out the kitchen window I saw that and I'm like I have to document this moment and send it to my sister because she's like my mom to us is like Kris Jenner that's how we think of our mom like she's just great on camera and so entertaining to watch so I don't know I did that that's a one time I went outside today and anyways but when my mom was at the office this morning I basically just worked sat inside drank coffee get cleaned up shit did some laundry my mom told me I used too much soap. I got that lecture later on. Um, I always use too much stuff. You know how they're like, Oh, it's concentrated. It's only a, you only need a third of the cap to do a load. It's like

500 loads per gallon jug of detergent. It's like, bitch, I use a full cap. Okay. I feel like I know what I'm doing. I, I, I've never, I've only had success stories doing a full cap. Whenever I do a little fourth cap, I feel like there's a little stank in the armpit armpits still in my workout clothes I'm on one tonight guys I'm trying to bring it for you I feel like I've been slacking lately and uh I don't know um fucking it's 8 15 I gotta get to bed by 9 bitch okay so I worked broke up my day bake some cookies okay every time I come home all I do is sit around and bake shit because my mom's got a kitchen aid I don't she has all the supplies I don't uh I busted out some oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. They were so good. I ate like half the, I literally ate half

the cookie dough. I'm pretty sure over the day, my mom comes home. She's like, Hey, do you want to get like Mexican tonight? Do you want to like order like takeout? I'm like, bitch, I don't think I'm going to eat till Saturday. Okay. I feel so, you know, when you eat too much sugar and you just feel like sick. I was like a little kid again, just with no breaks. So excited. I mean, I've been so Thanksgiving was exactly a week ago when I went all out but now I'm like okay I've been super rains have been pulled back all week I've been eating super healthy and shit and all of a sudden I had down all this fucking cookie dough midday okay this is my work break this is my lunch break I'm like working from home lunchtime hits I'm like yep bitch bake

cookies because I'm gonna bring them on our weekend we're going so let me update you guys we're helping my sister move tomorrow and like this whole weekend. And we're staying in a cabin. My grandparents are coming. My aunts, everyone's going to be there. I'm going to see my baby cousin for the first time in like over a year. And I don't think she's going to recognize me because I'm blonde. And anyways, so that's what we're doing this weekend. So I baked cookies to bring along. And anyways, that's what I did. And then I went back to work, took a little nap and I could totally do my day so fast but we got to talk about fucking my my mom and I had a conversation when she came home from work and then that's what I want to talk about and then

the world news um dude I'm just having a great time I love podcasting I feel like I'm back in San Diego the energy the vibes how I'm moving along the show today it feels good 91 days of podcasting holy shit should I tell you what I'm wearing I don't know I've been in uh sweatpants my mom doesn't like it when I wear baggy sweats she likes when I wear tight clothes so she can see my body and I think that's awkward it's not like that but she never saw the shape of my body until yesterday I've been home for seven days and I finally put on yoga pants and uh like a tight top and she's like oh you should wear that you shouldn't wear the big XL sweats and I'm like mom I do what I want

and it's cute as fuck. I like wearing big sweatsuits. It's cozy. Uh, so I got a big sweatsuit on pink, purple. It's like hot pink, light pink, purple. I'm wearing wool socks with my cheetah print slippers. My mom actually got me these at target. I insisted I would buy them and she's like, no, I got it. Just throw them in the car. You know, my mom always does that. I'm always trying to like, I don't know. It's so hard with my mom. Cause she'll just take care of it and I'm like mom I feel bad come on like I want to I want to own these and think I bought them I feel good about myself when I do that but I have a pink hoodie on hair up oh shit I didn't tell you guys this morning I had like a self-care pamper day when my mom left before before I started

work I did like my hair oh my god am I burping that's that's the whiskey whiskey burps are so gross whiskey's not bad though I like it and I like it when I'm cold I think it's like it makes you feel fuzzy inside and warm so I shit fucking shit uh hi mom are you hearing this right now I hope you're asleep shit she's far she's on the other end of the house by the way so I'm hoping this isn't too loud um I was I missed the part I told you I had a self-care morning why do we give a fuck about that Jacqueline washed her hair and had a me me moment this morning with the skincare and the all the shit so oh fuck I forgot to paint my nails for tomorrow I'm gonna have crusty nails this weekend if I don't paint them ew um okay so mom comes home after so I basically

here's my day. Intense phone call. Uh, mom goes to work. I work from home. I make cookies. I work, I take a nap and the mom comes home. So let's get to the part where mom comes home. Uh, we had a conversation about, it was great. She comes home and, um, I showed her how I made cookies. It was great. She made some food. And whenever we sit down and just have like heart to heart. I just like get, we work everything out. Right. And I feel like I need to mention and do a little update about what it's like to be a kid who moves to a new state where there's no family. Um, other than my mom's boyfriend that travels there frequently, like he comes to San Diego, I think every month. So that's like it for family that's down there, but that doesn't really

count I guess because no one's like living there but basically I've tried to express to my mom that or what I got through to her today after a conversation was I would rather because she offered she's like Jacqueline you know the pandemic who knows what's gonna happen jobs all this shit because you guys know I lost my job I uh lost my job was on you know the unemployment shit then I got a new job from August up until now I've been doing media relations uh PR work that kind of stuff remotely and um what was I gonna say shit uh but she's considering like well the world and the current state of the who knows what's gonna happen next year if it's gonna be a repeat year you might as well move home and no rent you know

you don't have to deal with that and I'm at this I had I expressed to her that I'll cut to the chase I wanted to tell her that or I did tell her that part of me being in my mid-20s living on my own being independent I have zero financial support from family like I'm out there doing it all on my own part of me thinks that coming and like moving home is like the easy route it's like a, it would be in my brain taking a step backwards. Cause I've served, I've like made it happen there for the last two and a half years. And I don't want to stop. I'm, I'm in this mindset now where it's so like, I'm on the up, I'm on the up and up right now. Like I just crawled my shit. I crawled myself out. I crawled myself out of a depression hole this year. I am finally getting

uh, help, you know, therapy families on board with where I'm at, um, with working on myself, trying to be a better person, all these things. And the like moving home, isn't, it's just not for me. I'm here right now. And I try to express to her, like, mom, nothing about being home so far is making me want, like, I'm not envisioning. I, I vision, I'm a very, uh, like visual person. I don't envision a life here even if it's a temporary like move home for a year don't live in San Diego you know don't do like I don't that's not even on my brain I don't even consider that as a possibility so it's really hard to I just feel like my mom wants me to move home and I really feel like that's her core she cares for me she wants me to be you know well off and not in a

And not, you know, by herself in uncertain times, but I just told her straight up. I'm like, I love the, I love the grind. I love having, I love being on the edge. Like, I don't like it when things are super comfortable and easy. If I just kicked my feet up and worked at your house remotely, the same job and everything and didn't pay rent and just like hung out for a year to bridge me to the next, I don't know. it's I'm like trying to like I said a couple days ago I've showed her all of my finances she knows

where I'm at it's not like I need to move home and I so I think underneath it all she just wants me to like I don't know be closer to family and it's kind of hard because I told her I'm at this point where I can I can basically do whatever I want work wherever I want take a trip home whenever I want I want to do it more frequently that's the solution here as long as I can whiz home like four or five six times a year you know week trips weekend trips all the holidays like I'm fine like that's perfect for me because I love my independence I love being away uh doing my own thing because I it's not easy it's like I have to get creative and get crafty on how to thrive in a city alone and like not have support in my back pocket with family down the

road and I don't know it's just a different lifestyle but I want to update you guys because I know maybe some of you have moved away from home and I don't know what your kind of relationships are with your parents and family and what they think of it but it's not necessarily the easiest thing but I told her she's like well why did it take you until now to like why are you getting your shit together now like what's what was that all about I'm like mom I graduated from college and set out like I packed up and moved out to California I was like called there like something in my soul whatever was like go to San Diego and I know that sounds woo-woo but I just had this like calling about it and I did it alone did it all on my own and I was like mom well the first couple

years you're working the kinks out you're figuring out how to live down there and I learned a lot of lessons along the way and now I'm at this point in my 26th year of realizing that moving forward I just want to be really proactive and not repeat mistakes learn from the past and just really take a like my life by the reins and boss up because the last couple years was like a frolicking around like a little lost puppy dog and now it's like shit you're you got to get your you got to get your shit together because the world's weird you're alone still anyway so that's a conversation we had when she came home from work it was really good I just um I guess at the end of the day you never really know what to expect and then I don't know like

you can't like, I, I know my parents support me a hundred percent. They are always going to give me the parental advice, the opposing, like the counter, like the alternative plan B if what my plan, if my plan doesn't work out. So I appreciate that. I'm so grateful for that because I know a lot of people move, they have terrible relationships with parents, family, and it's harder for them than I have it. So, uh, at the end of the day, I'm grateful for that, but it can be frustrating Cause I'm like, so basically mom, I got to move home to make you happy, but it's not like that. She just, um, doesn't want me to struggle, which I'm not, I feel like I've never been this. I've, I feel like I'm thriving in so many ways and it's awesome. So let's see. Okay. So,

oh my God, it's eight 30 almost. Um, dude, how's your December going so far? I feel like it's crazy. It's December. I feel like we're all reminiscing about 2020 right now. Everyone got their Spotify, uh, wrapped thing that came out, uh, their yearly recap of their Spotify songs and shit. And people were sending me screenshots of my podcast. I was like, Oh fuck. Okay. I didn't realize you were even listening. That's cool. Um, so yeah, I feel like this is a sweet time. It's the holidays. I feel like a lot of people are going home for the entire month, like going home for from Thanksgiving to Christmas like what I'm doing but I don't know it's just I hope you guys are doing good um I just have like a little bit left in my day to talk about and then uh we'll

get into oh I have a spider story oh my god and then we'll get into I gotta check the news before I go to bed just to like touch touch base with the world get a little pulse on what's going on so after our talk my mom works out she's rowing for charity she did 10,000 meters again um she did that I was doing yoga the whole time listening to a podcast doing yoga just kind of stretching it wasn't like a normal flow I do like a class it was just a uh like an hour or so stretching and okay so this is the spider story so while I'm in there I'm not used to the spiders in Washington because they're fucking terrifying they're like tarantula sized not that big they're just like big thick bitches and so this spider I saw in the corner of my eye uh while I was doing

yoga and I kept tabs on it I'm like okay I'm not scared of you you're just in your little web it was like a cobweb in the corner of the room the room I do yoga in is my old high school bedroom that my mom uses as like a storage closet like just random shit ends up we have like a piano in there we have luggage in there there's an old dresser all this random shit so uh I found like I cleared out the middle and I just like put my yoga mat down and put a mirror up so I see this little spider in the corner and I'm like okay I'm not I'm not afraid of you you're you're okay uh freaked me out at first of course anyways I'm done with yoga I'm talking to my mom and I'm like okay mom there's do you want to see this spider like it's fucking huge

and she's like go take care of it go take care of it and I'm like like kill it I think she want me and I don't kill spiders I just can't especially big ones I just feel like we need them anyways I go into the kitchen and I get a glass like a drinking glass because I was going to put it over it and then catch it right so I go into the back into the yoga room and it's still there had it moved I trusted that it would stay put because it was just sitting chilling in the corner you know it wasn't on the move like when you see a spider and it's crawling on the floor do not leave the room because you will lose sight of it so I was trusting it was still going to be there and it was okay this is the freakiest shit ever it's huge like I want to give it let me size compare it to

body the size of a quarter black okay uh like a little yeah like a quarter but make a quarter into a sphere like it's a body that's the size of that legs are about the length of a quarter just like thick black legs chilling in the corner I go over with the glass and I put the glass right on top of it dead center where the the spider would be in the middle of the glass as I cup it right I didn't clip its legs I didn't hurt it in any way it wasn't smashed nothing okay this fucking spider immediately died or played dead I don't know because I was like what the fuck it shriveled up into the smallest little ball it was as if it had a heart attack and all of its limbs just like balled up and like tensed up it was so freaky I

was like what just happened because normally they you know they'll run around inside the glass when you cover it when you try to catch it it'll run around and it'll be alive it'll be freaking out right but no this thing just immediately balled up and I was like what the hell so then I was like mom come look at this and she was just chilling on the couch on the phone with her boyfriend but anyways I go back and I'm like moving the glass around tried I like didn't take it off and poke it but I just like moved the glass and it was rolling around like a tumbleweed like completely dead. And I actually, after the show, I'm going to go in and check on it. Cause I'm like, what the fuck was that? It's still under the glass in there. It was so weird. I don't know if it can

spiders play dead. Should I Google that? Yeah, I should Google that. That's something guys. I don't Google things anymore. I don't like, I don't, I just like rant. I just don't, I don't rant. I just go today. I did this and this and this and this. I do exactly what I say. I don't like what influencers do at 6 a.m. I wake up and I go on a walk and then I literally like this whole time home I've been doing that so I'm sorry okay can spiders play dead Jamie can spiders play dead all right how to tell if a spider is playing dead or is really dead this is an actual Quora thing oh my god oh my god it says oh my god guys I think it was playing dead wait okay I just I love learning new things okay okay quora.com load bitch load bitch okay this is

really interesting I caught a spider in my house I kept it in a cup for about an hour and then brought it outside to let it go it crawled off the paper onto the deck and within seconds curled up and died why okay this is what people are saying if a spider is playing dead it is because something has knocked it out of its web when this happens most spiders will ball up and they may stay that way until there has been no further disturbance for a few minutes when I've poked a spider like that with a blade of grass they usually get up and run but it would be more kind to wait them out. Okay. So that spider was a hundred percent playing dead. Cause it didn't make sense when I covered it with a cup that I didn't hit it. It didn't get smashed. And I

immediately just like play dead and died. And it like, even when, even when I was moving the cup, it just like rolled around like lifeless. Okay. Anyways, that's my spider, spider story. Uh, after I did yoga, I caught the spider. Okay. And then let's see my mom, she made some prawns for dinner and I didn't eat dinner because I had too many cookies I was not fucking hungry I just like I hate when I do that I just like ate too much cookie shit midday and I was like I just felt like gross uh so I didn't eat dinner she made like big shrimp like huge I don't even know what they're prong prongs prongs she had that and we just like watched videos of my little cousin doing shit and uh we watched the news a little bit um

what else I think that's about it and then we just like talked and she went to bed but like there's something missing ah mom that's it that's that's the day so now that that's over with I'm gonna go into the news and check what's going on I really okay so before I came to Washington I knew there was shit going on with the election like Trump was saying it was there's voter fraud uh the election system is faulty or whatever like there's shit going on with that and now I'm hearing that some attorney or some guy something car is his last name uh some top guy was like there's no evidence of election fraud or there's not enough

to support Trump's claims I don't know so let me go let me just look this up you guys probably know all about it I just haven't been on the news I haven't I've all I know is that Biden is the president-elect Trump is trying to he's I guess announcing or already planning on running in 2024 uh the pandemic is escalating apparently in in the county I live the cases are really high and they're saying like you're probably gonna if you're in public in this valley you're probably gonna pass someone with virus so it's like going crazy here um I know the pandemic is still going on I know a vaccine is on the way something going on with the UK and the vaccine don't really know much about it just see some like I see some clips on the t the tv I read like the bottom description

I'm like okay that's something's going on with the vaccine then we got the Steelers what are they 12 and 0 now 11 and 0 first time in NFL history I watched that game last night it was great um I think that's badass I don't really like the Steelers Steelers that much but that's exciting for them uh that's going on in the news that's your sports news but I'm actually gonna look it up okay so where do you guys look at the news my mom's boyfriend asked me that he's like where because you're 26 you know I do I'm like older I do my thing with checking the news uh what do you do and I'm like I don't I just like see shit on social media if it's important enough, it'll bump up to the top, and I'll find out, and then randomly, like, I'll go

to Twitter, and I'll look at, like, the news shit, or I follow, like, I'll go to, uh, like, the, what's it called, uh, routers, routers, routers, I don't fucking know, I'm not, like, in it anymore, I, guys, I, I used to, I've told this story in college, I used to check, or I would buy New York Times every single day, and, or we didn't have to buy them on campus. I think they were free. Yeah. I would like wake up, read the entire, like basically all the times, the New York times and Thursday styles was my favorite day of the week. Cause they do the fashion section. I remember that. And I'd sip my coffee. I was like a 90 year old grandpa reading the newspaper thinking I was going to be a news reporter journalist. How did that work out? Oh, news. I'm doing some shit. Oh,

let's top stories here we go in fact this is me the national news tonight news them news them what's going on with california oh wildfires california's got some wildfires i saw that guys i'm your news reporter today i'm your if you haven't heard about the news today i'm doing my best i'm trying to update you guys in the most uh eloquent well-spoken uh knowledgeable way possible just off the top of my head all right news app isn't loading the Los Angeles Times Newsom orders new limits on California businesses and activities as COVID-19 soars yeah okay I'm just gonna like okay that's the news off the top of my head I gotta cut this because I gotta get I gotta I got an early wake-up call I gotta jump my grandpa okay he's

gonna pick us up at 7 which means 6 30 my grandpa's gonna come here 30 minutes early maybe I'll have some donuts that would be great uh we're driving six hours we're doing a family road trip it's gonna be great and uh so yeah I gotta get to bed but let me just like give you guys my it's December now virus has been going on since March I'm at this point now where here's my two cents I feel like what I'm observing doesn't make any sense you know what I mean it's like wait what the fuck are we doing california gavin gavin gavin jay inslee here in washington what the fuck it doesn't make any sense and like i'm not being insensitive to the fact that yes people are dying of this but i like i acknowledge that but it's as if we're trying to save

every like a hundred percent of lives and i know it's a new virus we you know i i don't know i just feel like the mask like biden announced when he's inaugurated like in the end of january he's gonna say or he's gonna put in a hundred day mask mandate or whatever in place where he's asking us for a hundred days when he's elected to wear a mask i'm like bitch we've been doing that all fucking year haven't we I mean what's different than what we've been doing now are we gonna be required to wear a mask all at all times like I don't get it it just seems stupid like when I heard that I was like what does that even what's that gonna do and then it's like okay the same time there's gonna be a vaccine early spring uh I guess I'm assuming I'm I guess elderly are gonna

to get it first. Um, I just feel like, can we just like, okay. I don't mind in 2021 continuing the mask thing. I don't mind. I don't mind wearing a mask at all. Businesses shutting down when there's a vaccine around the corner, that's going to like eliminate all the bullshit pretty much. Like that's how my brain works. I'm like, wait, so if we were going to have a vaccine, let's say February I don't know when it's coming out I'm just gonna off the top of my head say February why the fuck are we shutting shit down right now like I know there's cases on the rise and all this stuff but like I don't know I just feel like do you know what I mean it seems dumb am I I don't know I don't know vaccine will come out can we just open everything back can we just go back to

normal please is that how that works I don't know I don't know how vaccines work but my brain thinks. Everything we're doing now is dumb because there's a cure or there's a vaccine. There's some hope around the corner and we're able to treat it 10 times better than we did at first. And like, what's the COVID death rate? I don't even want, I should, I looked this up before I go to bed. I'll probably have fucking nightmares about this. It's so low, right? COVID death rate, death rate well they said one every minute now cdc coronavirus disease covet 19 cdc website okay the reason why i think it's bullshit is when the cdc came out with the numbers that said so after the new york times said a hundred thousand deaths of

COVID, that big headline that came out, I don't know the timeline, but after maybe two or three weeks, a week, a few days, CDC released the data that says basically the percentage of people that died of COVID, 100% from COVID, basically it turned out to be like 9,000 deaths from just covid all the other people that died had some sort of comorbidity there's something else going on that contributed to the death like probably probably um it was i don't know so that was just like what the fuck and so now i'm like wait it's probably still the same these people dying from it's probably the same shit like they probably have um okay here's sorry let me i'm just ranting now. I just don't understand it fully. And it doesn't, like I said, I just feel like it doesn't

make any sense. Nothing makes sense. It doesn't make sense. And I hate that. I'm like, wait, what's, are you kidding me? Okay. Here's what I don't like. I guess this is what doesn't make sense the most to me is when I'm in the fucking grocery store on the little, I can't do the L's. You guys know I have struggles with my L's because I have an overactive tongue that thrusts forward and I had a gap in my teeth my whole childhood and I have this issue with my fucking tongue and I don't know what to do the lily lily the lily pads the lily how do I do an L oh lily ew guys that's disgusting the lily pads how did that sound the lily pads at the grocery store make zero sense I get the idea social distance six feet in line when you're standing waiting to get

checked out but like people are like at Vons in California there's like okay backed up to the freezer section there's like little dots you got to stand on with your cart but then at the same time someone's grabbing ice cream grabbing a pizza going all around you it's like it's just fucking stupid and every time I see stuff like that the social even the fucking why am I swearing the glass they put in front of like or the plastic and shit I'm like I'm what percent like how effective like how much is that helping and I'm sure it's the littlest amount makes the biggest difference like it's better than nothing that's kind of the mindset I have probably it's probably better have that little screen up at the cashier than having nothing but I don't know it just looks

so dumb. That's all it is to me. I just look at it. I'm like, this is fucking dumb. Okay. Wait. Um, okay. So COVID death rate worldwide mortality. I want to know us. Um, this infographic is fucky on my phone. Fatality rate country. Okay. Let's go to us. How are you guys doing? Have you guys had COVID yet? what's the what's the latest what's the status um lebanon india iceland finland want to go to united states where is it i'm scrolling down all the countries my whoop shop just yelled at me aim for five hours and five hours and 48 minutes of sleep tonight that's weird that's like nothing dude why is the united states easy to find on this

we're like it's usually us at the top what the food um white privilege united states privilege who are usually just easy to find on maps and shit and lists because we're the most important okay is it literally the first one oh oh united states two percent what does that mean case fatality deaths per 100k wait deaths per 100k population united states six wait a minute united arab emirates you guys this is boring i'm just looking at data data okay i gotta know this what's the covid death rate what changing death rates tell us about covid 19 another sip of whiskey

i'm a slow sipper i slip i sip very slow okay they have ranged from less than one percent to as much as 25 in some countries the death rate okay i don't give a fuck okay guys vaccines coming out bitch 2021 is gonna hit new president potentially I don't fucking think coronavirus I don't think Trump's gonna I don't think Trump's gonna be uh in the house in the White House for the next four years I would do don't think that's gonna happen for him RIP Trump 2020 just didn't work out for you uh good luck in 2024 fucking Biden will be the president masked up will mask up for 100 days like he says same shit different

year fucking 2020 repeat we're gonna vaccine uh I believe I think the kinks are gonna work out next year with the virus it's gonna unfold vaccines will roll out people calm the fuck down and then business as usual hopefully 2022 but look have no fear like the I saw this great quote this girl on Instagram, um, she's like an Insta baddie. Um, hold on. Nikki San Diego. I don't know her, but she's, uh, from San Diego. She posted a quote, Nikki San Diego. Uh, there she is. Nikki Sullivan. She posted something and I read it and it was a great, um, summary of like how I think about COVID and how it's just like a cool, it's a great, it's worded well, Jesus Christ, I can go to bed. Just because someone isn't afraid of COVID-19 doesn't mean

that he or she doesn't believe in it. It just means that he or she understands the risk, but doesn't prioritize fear over life and freedom. And that's the tea. That's it. Okay. that's it because I don't prioritize fear over life and freedom like I've I don't know you guys just you guys get the you guys optimism Gary Vee a glass half full don't be negative COVID-19 don't be have no fear you guys get the idea I'm not going to go into like the psychology of living in fear and versus living in like, uh, abundance and freedom. Uh, I think your body knows if you're in a state of fear, that's going to weaken your immune system. You guys know all this shit. It's been a whole year of, of education about immune systems, coronavirus, stay safe, social distance,

unprecedented times, global pandemic, uh, fucking we've learned zoom meeting etiquette. We've watch Tiger King I need to end this fucking podcast this is a very educational year about global global global pandemics and I think at the end of the day my biggest eye-opening uh lesson was how fucking dumb we are I know we're gonna look back at this in like 10 years and be like we are so fucking stupid we're doing the best we can but I feel like it's just like Gavin Gavin Gavin Gavin Newsom what are you fucking doing okay what are you doing it's fucking stupid I just can't make sense of it my brain does not it just doesn't understand it I say open the fucking floodgates everyone fend for yourself social distance

yourself mask up yourself I like the fact that I like the freedom aspect where we we're free to choose what we want to do if you're you know immunocompromised and elderly obviously don't don't go gyrate in the club but like people should still be able to gyrate in the club actually I feel like that shit's been going on and people are getting really sick I don't know to do. Guys, just wait till 2022. We'll figure it out. I don't know. Okay. I just dragged this on way too long. Happy Thursday. Can't believe Thanksgiving was exactly a week ago. I've been home for a whole week now. Holy shit. Episode 91. We're coming to a close here. Hope you had a great day. I got to pack tomorrow morning for the weekend. I'm going to a cabin. I got to shave.

I'm going to sit in a hot tub with my family and I, no, wait, I shaved this morning. Did I shave this morning? I did. Guys, I just caught myself. That's cool. That's always the best. You're like, I already took care of business. Um, but yeah, hope you had a great day. Talk to you tomorrow. Stick around. Oh my God. I didn't plug. I didn't plug anything on this episode. Stick around if you're a patron and if you don't know what that means, is go over to patreon.com slash tjms to become a patron if you want to support the show everyone gets a shout out everyone gets my exclusive patreon only content it's fun i do phone calls i post pics that don't make it to instagram there that kind of shit uh also another way to support

the show is leave a review on the apple podcast app and if you haven't already go ahead and subscribe, like actually subscribe to the show. Uh, also follow me on Instagram. That was fun. Is this an ASMR channel now? I don't fucking know. Should I do that? Should I do an ASMR section for you guys? I'm annoying. Um, literally three sips of whiskey, feeling it, feeling fuzzy Jacqueline go to bed uh that's it you can follow me on Instagram too YouTube's coming back in January I don't give a fuck about that basically patreon.com slash tjms or and or leave a review on the apple podcast ad that's all I got for you today talk to you tomorrow for Friday all right bye all right today's patreon.com slash tjms patron shout outs go to

my four amigos my four compadres my four stooges we got ricky jensen thank you ricky for your support i really appreciate you trevor garrett eagle one and ozzy osbourne i just gave ricky more appreciation the last three of you guys you know what i feel you know i feel a lot i feel grateful I feel thankful for your support means a lot to me I hope you're doing well I hope you enjoy this episode if you didn't I get it like fucking Jacqueline does it seven days a week it's getting a little bit overkill you're just like all right when are your interviews coming we need to hear someone else talk I know I know well actually yesterday did my mom yesterday's my first interview so go back to episode 90 to hear that okay you guys know you probably already

did. Love you guys. Thanks for your support. Talk to you tomorrow. All right. Bye.