The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - 2 interviews

Episode Date: September 25, 2022

Partake of my #1 bestselling book of poems, Marlon Brando 9/11: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0B92NWWDCGet the audiobook and join the Patreon, and more: https://www.patreon.com/jdfmccannThanks to Mike G https://www.instagram.com/comedymikegoldstein/?hl=enand Billy OakleyCheck out Billy Oakley's exhibition on at Floating Goose,23rd sept- 16th October, open thurs-sun 11-4 https://www.instagram.com/billyoakley_/?hl=en Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan. If you'd like to listen to bonus episodes, go sign up to the Patreon. That's patreon.clom. Clom? Ah, we f***ed it. Anyway, look, you'll find a way. Catamaran Home! Can Indigenous ways of knowing help kids cope with online bullying? At the University of British Columbia,

we believe that they can. Dr. Johanna Sam and her team are researching how both Indigenous and non-Indigenous youth cope with cyber aggression, working to bridge the diversity gap in child psychology research. At UBC, our researchers are answering today's most pressing questions.

To learn how we're moving the world forward, visit ubc.ca forward happens here. are answering today's most pressing questions. To learn how we're moving the world forward, visit ubc.ca forward happens here. Any idiot can release a podcast where they interview somebody, but only a true genius, only a man with the power to turn a podcast into a boat, only the hardest working man in show business would ever even think of the insane possibility of releasing a podcast with not one, but two interviews. Hello and welcome to this very special episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann catamaran plan. Two interviews on today's show. One is an interview with the excellent Mike G. He's on television.

He is on the Phone Hacks podcast with Nick Capa. And I went around and I did their podcast. And then after Nick Capa left, he had to go and do something. Excuse me, I dropped a very large tray. I said, Mike G, can we maybe just sit here and keep talking into the microphones? I found this is an excellent technique for quickly being able to record something. You just record another thing after you do someone else's podcast. And we had a great chat about an upcoming trip to America.

And what is the next interview? I went to Billy Oakley's show. Boys, boys, boys. Billy Oakley is a great artist. I own one of his paintings. A big, beautiful painting that is worth more now than when I Boys. Billy Oakley is a great artist. I own one of his paintings, a big, beautiful painting that is worth more now than when I bought it because his star is on the rise.

And I had some ideas about that and going to the show and talking to him. And the painful blathering commenced the first interview. Mike G, hello. Hello, thanks for having me. This is exciting. I'm nervous. No, don't be, don't be.

All right, so look, the general premise of the podcast is that i'm trying to make enough money to buy a boat yeah so we've raised about two and a half thousand dollars okay you know and then things have been spent things of incoming outcoming but about two and a half thousand dollars towards what's the have you said the final number it's a five hundred thousand dollar boat okay so you only got another 300 years of doing this podcast. It's currently not within my lifetime. The Patreon is doing really well. You can join the Patreon. Anyone listening wants to go to the Patreon link below.

And I've got a book of poems out that we're trying to sell that and make some money. Number one book of poems in Australia. It's incredible how few poems you can sell and get to number one. But one thing that is coming up that I thought, I'm going to America myself that I thought I'm going to America myself

I know you're going to America I've never been and I got I've got a couple people who have said I can stay with them in America and they can give me gigs this is off the back

of the Marlon Brando 9-11 I wish one is one is Amos Gill yeah who is in LA making a fist of it Hollywood Amos Gill

they call him Hollywood Gill yeah he would not be a hard person to come up with things for the Fine Hacks podcast dude He's in LA making a fist of it. Hollywood Amos Guild, they call it. Hollywood Guild, yeah. He would not be a hard person to come up with things for the Fine Hacks podcast. Dude, dream guest. I just had to do the sex doll thing. Yeah, you just did our pod and you posted a fascinating photo,

a bunch of sex dolls that have been dragged out into a field and then it's for the European sex doll meet, which I don't... Well, I imagine it is a real thing oh look i mean i i wonder if that's in europe or if that's whites only sex dolls yeah but the important thing that i want to raise to you i've never been to america i'm going to be in new york i think for a week right i think i've we'll find out but i think i've got a week in new york and a couple days in la yeah i have I've got a minimal amount of time I've got a minimal budget

yeah um because we're having a baby in December and I'm I'm opening for some people in comedy maybe

in November so I've basically got two and a half weeks max so is this part of the New York Comedy Festival no didn't know is that going to be on at the time

I think it's like early to mid November that could be bad uh-huh October sorry it's October I'm mid-November. That could be bad. October, sorry. It's October. I'm doing it in October. Okay.

And no one knows this. I haven't mentioned this to anyone that I'm going to this special catamaran trip. Is this a big announcement right now? Big announcement is that I'm going to America for about two weeks, but I don't know what to do. I don't know who to talk to. I don't know how to build the podcast there. I don't know how to do anything that would be fruitful. Like,

because I've got to leave my family. I've got to spend this boat money going to America trying to build a fan base there to build more money. You know, you go there, you build up an audience.

Maybe I go on Joe Rogan. Maybe I go on Oprah and people start listening to the podcast. Wouldn't that be something? Yeah. How do I make the most of my time? Where do I go? Who do I talk to?

What's worth doing in America? Are you allowed to say who you're opening for? Like, are you doing support spots already? Do you have shit booked? I don't think I have support spots there booked. Sorry, I've got support spots here booked that I can't talk about yet.

So I have to be back by November. Let's say early November. So you're asking me how do you make it in New York in two weeks? If you had two weeks to make it in New York, what would you do? Where would you go? Who would you talk to?

And also, you can go anywhere in America. Say we've got a week in New York. Is it worth going to Ohio? Should Florida have my time? I mean, what do you want? Do you want the beach? Do you want a Midwest experience? None of my personal feelings should come into this.

I want totally results-driven. I want to spend the people who are backing me to buy boats money the best way I can. Yeah. You know? Okay. So you want to up your profile as quickly as possible in the toughest entertainment market in the world.

That's the one. We've already got some fans in Zimbabwe. We're growing in South Africa. These markets I haven't felt as much resistance. I think you have to like kill a famous person or something. I hear that's a good way to do it. I'd say like a Michelle Obama or something. No, I couldn't.

She's so wonderful. We could probably talk about which famous person I could kill. Yeah. Well, so we're thinking New York, a New York-based famous person. If John Lennon happens to be walking through a town, maybe I'll shoot his statue. I got bad news. Oh, yeah.

I take it back. So you've been to America. You're from America. Oh, yeah. And I used to go back every year before. What happened? Something happened in 2020 that kind of prevented me from going back all the time.

But yeah, I would go back for at least a month every year. They stole an election and you decided that wasn't for you anymore. Yeah, exactly. I was like, oh, just off of it. So I could recommend places. I'd say in New York, you could do open mics and bringer shows where-

Not worth my time, frankly. No, no. I've seen that life. I did a bringer show once where they're like, yeah, just bring four people and they all got to pay a two drink minimum. And it'll be, you know, that was the rules to get on at the show.

This is stand up New York. And I went and had a great show because some of the people on the bill, it's hard not to look real good in comparison. And then the club owner comes up to me and he's like, hey, that was really good. I was like, thanks, man. And he goes, yeah, come back next week. And I said, all right. And he was like, yeah, he goes yeah come back next week and I said alright and he was like yeah just bring

six people this time that was the good part was the bringing the people who were drinking exactly so and then you know you feel bad

for your friends and family that you dragged out to the show because they're sitting through the most heinous open mic show I won't let them see me here

yeah exactly yeah so yeah so I guess avoid doing all that shit. And then I would say just have a good time.

Go see shows. Not comedy shows. I'm not here to have a nice time. Go see the Green Day American Idiot musical. Is there really such a thing? Yeah, I went. God, I didn't like it when it was an album. Yeah, it's a bad album.

But, I mean, surely there must be cool podcasts. There must be management people. Is it easy to get on a syndicated television program? Well, I feel like you're asking a guy who's been in Australia, who I guess, quote unquote, has kind of attained some success in Australia. But clearly, I haven't attained any success in America. I don't know. It's opaque to me.

It's like a veil that you go through. I don't know what's happening on the other side. And when you go to America, so you're going to America soon. For how long will. It's opaque to me. It's like a veil that you go through. I don't know what's happening on the other side. And when you go to America, so you're going to America soon. For how long will you be there? Two months. Two months. And what will you do?

You'll see family? So the plan is, so yeah, I fly out in less than a week. I'll go to Kansas first to see my old ass parents. Beautiful part of the world. Yes.

Oh, Trump country. Is it really? Yeah, for sure. Wonderful. Mom had an Obama bumper sticker on her car, and her car got keyed mercilessly.

Well, sometimes justice is done. So I'll go to Kansas, try to get past some jet lag, and then New York for a friend's wedding. My partner will join me in New York. And then from there, we're going to go New Orleans, Miami to see other friends and hang out at the beach. Yes. And then Chicago where I'm dragging her to a…

This is a strange way to do it, isn't it? This is a lot of moving up and down and around and around. I don't know the geography for a while. I guess it would kind of make sense if we went New York, Miami, New Orleans, Chicago. So, that is the more… But they're all a bit closer than the Australian things, right? Yeah. But we're going to do that and then I'm going to go to Kansas

and as a man in his 40s, still just going to jail from my parents' basement for a while. And then from there to back to New York and I'll see my sister in Rhode Island. I hear Rhode Island is one of the worst ones. Yeah, I don't think it's good. I mean, are you thinking Long Island, maybe? No, I'm thinking Wu-Tang Clan.

Okay. Are they from Rhode Island? No, maybe I'm making this. Excuse me, they're from Staten Island. I'm going to have to get all these islands. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Staten Island's real bad. And Pete Davidson also. Is he really?

Staten Island boy. I'm not a fan. No. I don't think he should have had the intimacy with kim kardashian or kate beckinsale is the one that broke my brain was he really yeah gosh there's no two of them are the same dude insane so yeah so i'm i doubt i'll do any gigs because i wouldn't drag my partner through that process of me like going to you won't you So you just see family, you reconnect.

But you have... If you've gone every year... So you've gone... Yeah. And you've tried... The way you speak about it, it makes me sound like you've tried to break America at certain times. Did you do comedy over there?

So I did live in New York for a year and did the open mic scene for a full year. And it was... At the time, it was just... I mean, it's always tons of dudes and comedies but they were all doing impressions of either bilber louis ck or david tell right and like even the boston invasion yeah affectations and the voice the mannerisms were it was crazy yeah and i don't know they're still doing louis ck maybe but i've never really made a concerted effort i'm in with the comedy store in la jolla but not the one in la la jolla yeah where's la jolla sandy isn't that michael jackson's

sister or something yeah la jolla um she's she's got a lot of plastic surgery and so sorry so it's it's in where sorry that one's san diego san diego yeah so i'd worked with a comic in southeast asia who got me in with the club there and then my buddies that i grew up with live in san diego so i'd done la jolla okay yeah and you can edit this out yeah totally if you want because i don't want to stamp on anyone's money yeah but would you get paid to do gigs there oh you're a citizen so you can just make money that's no problem yeah but if i'm I'm visiting, I can't. But it's crazy. The money is dog shit because there's so many people trying to do it. Yes.

But you have much more hustle than me. Like, you know. It's all an illusion. Oh, man. It's all just for the podcast. But I think, you know, like, I'm generally a shame-filled man and so I don't ask for opportunities. You know who I just had on this, my podcast? Yeah. It was Ash Fils-Aimé, who has started asking as he's got older.

And I had him say it on the podcast. But after he recorded his special, I said, how did it go? He told this during the podcast as well, that he told me at a previous time. But I said, how was the special? And he said, it was like God was in the building. And now after a good set, that's what I say. People go, how was the set? And I say, it was like God was in the building. now after a good set that's what i say people go how was the set and i say it was like god was in the building i just love saying it but he said he said he's developed

the ability to ask for things but now hold on but you've got for an australian yeah excellent hustle you know you're always doing things you're always yeah going places i mean that's based on just sheer talent i think that's talent alone yeah that's what I find about getting to do a panel show on television. It's only the very supreme Australian comedians. They say that. The most likable, talented people. Exclusively so. Yeah, get to sit next to...

Sometimes I'll watch the project and go, my eyes are going to fall out with all the excellence before me on this splendid program. So, yeah, outside of murdering a famous New York citizen and then I guess who would it be? Spike Lee? I couldn't kill Spike Lee.

He's a wonderful filmmaker. What was his last good film? I've never seen a Spike Lee joint in my life. You knew it was a joint though. I knew it was a joint but I like it when he stands up at the basketball

and he starts hectoring people. True, true. No, I would never kill Spike Lee. I mean, who would be your new york dream kill that's the question that's a great podcast new york dream kill um it's a great question uh i don't i mean i just think of new york people that i love and would never kill my pete davidson no look even though i disapprove of some of the things comedian you know the brotherhood. Absolutely. And his father died at 9-11. That's very sad.

True. Lauren Michaels, you could just go up the SNL ladder. But he's consistently churned out excellent quality television programming year after year. True. Well, this is what I urge you to do. Right up until about 1995. Sorry, go on. The guy who did the I should be on SNL viral TikTok video.

Didn't that make you want to be sick? Do you want me to euthanize him? Yeah. I would never do that. But you should do something in that vein. I want to make it in New York. But you make yours about the project. I want to get on the project.

Get me on the project. All those project writers do not. Every time I ask or do something like, maybe I could do this on the project, they just look at me with a cold, dead eye. Man, if you did a funny could do this on the project they just look at me with a cold dead eye man if you did a funny musical get me on the project clip

I'm telling you hello Waleed how are you I've got some things to say about the Muslim Brotherhood there you go excuse me

you'll be on well I mean there must be some project equivalent over there I mean the Tonight Show Simon Taylor just made it on the Tonight Show

have you ever been on the Tonight Show I have not I mean there's The View which is Taylor just made it on The Tonight Show. Have you ever been on The Tonight Show? I have not. I mean, there's The View, which is a bunch of old clams sitting around just talking topics. Imagine that view. No, excuse me. Great ladies, great talent. Joy.

They did an amazing thing, though, where that Norm Macdonald clip of him saying Bill Clinton's a murderer. Yeah. They aired it, which is which is to me would never it was a wonderful time comedian saying it's crazy he went on for his apology tour and it was so sad they got him to do that you know in his final years because of that roseanne stuff and the um the thing he said on howard stern howard stern would be a good one to go on oh maybe he'll let me ride that machine that gives you an orgasm. Baba Booey.

Dude, someone, I was just watching the US Open finals on the ball toss. You're a tennis guy. I'm a tennis guy. And someone screamed Baba Booey on the server's ball toss. And it fucking buckled me. Did it kill in the room? No. That's sad.

That's not right. Are you a Nick Kyrgios person? Or do you find him to be too upsetting? Look, I like the tennis, but the screaming at his players' box. It is the screaming at his own people. It's the only really hard thing to stomach. I like the tantrums on the court if it's directed at the other player. I love it.

Or a chair umpire. Or just people he doesn't know personally. But why aren't you getting behind me? Why aren't you supporting me? I find that really hard to see. It's gross. But then the fact that it disappears when the match is over this is a weird thing the he did this time smash the racket on the ground and there was a weird discourse where people in australia were going like he lost and he got angry and i like to see that in nick get angry for losing but usually when he loses it's like a whole weight has come off him yeah and he's just he's not being tortured anymore no it's like a whole weight has come off him. Yeah. And he's just, he's not being tortured anymore. No.

It's a very strange dynamic. This episode is brought to you by Google Pixel. I'm Jessi Cruikshank. I host the number one comedy podcast called Phone a Friend. I also have three kids. I need help making every day easier. So I switched to Google Pixel. It's a phone powered by Gemini, your personal AI assistant.

Gemini can help you summarize your unread emails, suggest what to make with the food in your fridge. And it helped me achieve a family photo where everyone is smiling at the camera. I didn't think it was possible, but it is with Google Pixel 9. Learn more at store.google.com. Breaking news happens anywhere, anytime. Police have warned the protesters repeatedly, get back. CBC News brings the story to you as it happens. Hundreds of wildfires are burning.

Be the first to know what's going on and what that means for you and for Canadians. This situation has changed very quickly. Helping make sense of the world when it matters most. Stay in the know. CBC News. It is, but the fact that he's seemingly trying now, like people are into. He should win a Grand Slam at some point.

Not with these new guys coming up, I think. And, you know, he's already. He made Medvedev, right? True. That's pretty good. Oh, that that's great but he is also i mean he's 27 dude in tennis years that's but what if they find a way to inject embryos into roger federer's knees get him back out there for another couple i mean he is doing this and also that was a jokovic free tournament and i think he's a brick wall that was his chance yeah yeah so that was his big chance that's why he's pissed off and

then he couldn't get through that second Russian, a giant Russian man named Karen, by the way, which is... The worst guy. The worst guy. I don't think they should have let those Russians compete. No, I mean, that's what Wimbledon did, you know. But I kind of support the Russian troops. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. As they flee across the border. Yeah. They're having a hard time at the moment. Are they? But the important thing is this trip to America. I don't know if I've given you a good answer

because I just don't think No, I feel like I haven't weaseled anything. Just anything that I because my thought is Australians go, right? They go to LA. You spend a week in LA.

You go, gee, there's a lot of homeless people here. You know, you go to the Yeezy Gap and you buy yourself a hoodie and then you get on at the worst possible time slot at whatever the store. Yeah. And you get the photo and people go, well can't believe it at the store man it's like a laugh factory at 4

a.m to six people well you can have a kramer style meltdown at the laugh factory i don't want to i mean you don't want to be famous i guess there's got to be a better way than murdering somebody or saying that word over and over yeah and i think also k than murdering somebody or saying that word. Over and over. Yeah. And I think also Kramer goes up there and says that word. That gets on the news. I do it and people go, an unusual Australian man has been removed. I think I am.

I said, make the musical, get me on the project clip, you know, murder. That gets me on the project here. There's no project there, is there? Get me on. So not SNL. That's been done. So maybe get me on what's big over there at the moment here's a thought because some people are going to be easy to get because they've been

cancelled yeah um and they're still big names and maybe they still have a reach like i'm thinking of charlie rose who i don't know what he did but i think it must be pretty bad i'm not even sure what he did no no what was happening behind those black backdrops, who can say? Yeah. And the deep unpleasantness. But I wouldn't mind talking to Charlie Rose. He's probably not a threat to me. Right.

Well, we'll give you legit advice if that's what you want. Yes, please. Legitimate advice. There's a dude who does a podcast in, he's in Melbourne. Yeah. Like he's, he's, Capper and i have both done it very friendly dude yeah but he gets some relatively famous american who is this man um michael something i'll find it i'll find the name of the pod but he legit just puts those things of a celebrity and puts their name like so whatever

so james.mccann yeah and then at gmail.com just get there yeah and then just fires off as many emails as possible and then they respond

and he's got you know some and he has the working relationships with these people well he's got whatever the brief is where you know he goes

I have thousands of listeners or whatever he tells him yeah and then like he gets them on and they're all Zoom calls. But it's a way of, I guess, a lot of celebrities actually just have their name. As their email.

Yeah, at Gmail. Well, I just got through emailing a bunch of people about my book of poems. I tried to reach out to 2 Chainz. Didn't get back to me. Brian Wilson. I don't know if his whole mind is still there no he's gone so yeah maybe try putting in like michelle.obama at gmail.com and then she might like to i've got a poem about her in the book do you yes i mean who's your dream guest really

oh well i mean i'll tell you who the i think is the most exciting person in the world and the best living comedian is Steve Harvey. I'm a big Steve Harvey fan. Oh, Family Feud. So, like, there's a show. You just need a family. I need a family to come with me. Yeah.

I could be on someone else's family. Yeah. But I love Steve Harvey. Well, steve.harvey at gmail.com. He seems like a... He's a hard worker, too. Like, he might be interested. But, I mean, there are many, obviously, great comedians.

Do you have access to the top American... If I said, I like to meet bill burr do you have you met bill burr i haven't met bill burr okay but i mean i know david chapelle david le chapelle i haven't met him i mean i know maybe more mid-tier dudes like your sam murrell's and your mark norman's okay they're great you know mark norman yeah it's incredible But I'm still not going to message him and say... I understand. I understand. Like I've got Ronnie Chang on Facebook because I met him years and years ago

and we did Raw together. Yeah, I know Ronnie. We were never in the same city. But here, this is... I also know for a fact, maybe he stopped doing this, but Mark Norman has a compulsion where he answers every DM he gets on Instagram.

Get out. So send him something. All right, I will. Do it. It's not a bad idea. something. All right, I will. Do it. It's not a bad idea. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Don't drop my name.

Okay. Close personal friend, Mike G. Let me know. This is a good idea. I mean, there are so many great Americans. And you know Shane Gillis now. We just did support for him. So hit him up.

He's in Philadelphia. Well, he's in New York. He lives in Queens. I have hit him up. Yeah. But he's very, I mean, he's also, he's very busy. Yeah. I have hit him up. But he's very busy. Yeah. His career's exploding.

And you ate a sushi. And I did eat all of his sushi. And so I've asked him. He's been really nice in replying to me. But it's also like at some point he could go, excuse me, I have to host the Oscars. And I won't be able to look after him. He's not going to host the Oscars.

SNL fired him. He's so good. He's the best. He's really remarkable. Yeah. But I would like to go to Philly for Matt the man he does the podcast with

and I'd like to talk to him I have to reach out to him yeah I want one of those cheese steaks I'd like to meet this Will Smith maybe Will Smith is a low ebb and could be

could be met and there is a Catholic town called Steubenville in Ohio yeah mostly famous for a high school rape that took place, but also for many great Catholic individuals.

That was at the lacrosse team. No, that was a day off. Sorry, it may have been a lacrosse team. I'm not sure of the school. But I like to go there to meet people. And a big one, my favorite YouTuber is in Ohio, Makara Tours. She makes dresses.

She's great. There's no way I'm getting to meet her. She's too famous. Man, I mean, if you want me to recommend cities and stuff, I'd say skip Kansas. Okay. Yeah. Obviously, you're going to LA.

I'm going to throw names at you. Kentucky. Yeah, we're in Kentucky. Exactly. Is St. Louis in Kentucky? I hear there's a derby. St. Louis is Missouri, which is a great town. I hear St. Louis is great.

Yeah. West Virginia. You could probably get on at the club in St. Louis. I mean, there's improvs everywhere. They call them improvs at clubs. And then if you just send an official enough looking email... Well, here's a thought because I thought what would be good... I've got a three-year-old.

Yeah. And we don't... Probably won't have her starting school till she's six. And we're out of... We've got a house at the moment, but we might have to be out of there a year. There's no way I'm making enough money to buy a house in a year's time. So it's like, what can we do?

Well, you've got to buy a catamaran. I do have to buy a catamaran, and that might happen this year immediately, or it might take a little while. But if I don't have the catamaran in a year's time, could I buy like an RV and get a visa and just travel around America doing comedy clubs with my family and see the country? Yeah.

I mean, there's still that circuit, this strip mall circuit. I have just found out. Amos Gill just did that. He was in, I think it was Kentucky. I don't know. It was the biggest mall in America. And they had a comedy club there. Sorry, it was Minnesota. Yeah. I remember thinking of the little yachty song cold like minnesota when he told me it's a great song

but i just couldn't believe a comedy club in a mall imagine that if you go down you know next to the gucci store in the chaddy yeah and there's a comedy club i love the thought of it oh i mean you love the thought of it but the, I mean, you love the thought of it, but the actual experience? Apparently, it's a decent club, that one. I mean, is it Hilarities? I forget the name of it. But there's also, yeah, do the improvs. I mean, if you get in with one of the chains,

because there's chain clubs, I think. So it's worth trying to get in with the chains. And how would you get in with the chains? Just go and, you know, you're good with the hustle. Just send the emails and say. You keep saying this. This is not true. Drop Gillis's name.

I just supported Shane Gillis, you know, all the rest. Yes. And, I mean, you've got to eat shit for a while. I think you've got to do the. This is my issue. I don't have a while. I don't. Honestly, I've got a heavily pregnant wife.

Yeah. I've got people having crises left, right, and center. The fact that I've got this many at a time is really impressive. If I could even just break one of them, that would be something. Well, then try the improvs, I think. And then, yeah, just say, oh, look, I'll come to a 10-minute spot. And then if you like it, I'm happy to do the weekend, whatever. And then a lot of them do the thing where there'll be an open mic on a tuesday

or whatever and which improv would you go to in which city i mean the only one i'm kind of in with is the kansas city one i will go to kansas city yeah but and you'll you'll be there with your parents in the basement oh true you're there in october i'm just thinking now hold on when are you in kansas city can i stay can i stay with your parents and that's the hustle yeah oh dude it's getting on the couches this sounds not good for anybody at all i'll bunk with you i'll be there from october 14th in kansas city but i think i will leave to go back to new york late october so maybe we're there at the same time that would be very nice. Yeah.

So then we could do the hustle together, you know, strength in numbers. We're coming up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Making it happen. And we'll be doing Madison Square Garden before you leave.

MSG. Yeah. It's my favorite kind of MSG. Michael Stephen Goldstein. Is it really? Yeah. Great on some Chinese food. Yeah.

Look, how long have we done this for? I've taken up too much of your time. 24 minutes. That's a longer podcast episode than I ever do. Mike G. First of all, I just want to say, I end with affirmations on the podcast.

I affirm that we're going to do this. I'm going to meet you in America. We're going to get it done. I might even consider getting vaccinated to be allowed into the country. That's a joke. I took their poison. You're a big Novak supporter.

Novak's jock of it. I got the two, and then I got COVID, and I was fine. So I'm not getting any more getting it's a myth anyways the virus yeah yeah it was not it was easily not one of the top three illnesses i had that year the gastro i had a month prior worse and vomited at the same time in the bed oh you seem like i have it a lot i love experimental chicken that's a really big thing for me but i affirm we're going to make this happen. I'm going to follow up all those leads, except the ones about killing people

or about making a song for the project. Or the Laugh Factory N-word. Hmm? No, I'll be doing that one. Okay. That'd be outrageous. I'll do that at the improv. I've got to crack that.

Well, no, because I'm friends with comics there. And then, you know, we'll just go down to the comedy cellar. If any of them have podcasts that you can get me on, that would also be a great way to crack America. Yeah. Do you know Joseph Rogan? No. He's a big deal.

Is he? I hear. What's he do? He fights people. Physically. He's very small. He's the elk meat guy. No, you're thinking of Alex Jones.

I like him too. Actually, there's so many cancelled people that I think I could hit up. You get on Alex Jones' podcast, you're set. Yeah, I mean, that could be good. He seems like a great guy. I think he is.

Yeah. He's got a lot to say about school shootings. Well, not anymore. Did you see the bit where he was saying, I did it. I killed those kids.

No. I've heard people talk about it, but I haven't seen it either you know that the red scare ladies that's a podcast that seems to be happening i don't know i don't know that's that's the one thing that's a and the references to the communism i think one of them is i don't think they are communists though but i listen to so few podcasts one of them is actually russian right well i think her name is daria i think and i worked with a russian woman named daria i think i'm only privy to this because to so few podcasts. One of them is actually Russian, right? Well, I think her name is Daria, I think. And I worked with a Russian woman named Daria once. I think I'm only privy to this because they were trying to cancel her

for some statement. Ah, probably. I mean, they're trying to get everybody. I don't know what they're trying to get me for. You should do the James McCancel podcast where you just try to... Say things that get me cancelled? No, I think you try to cancel people.

Oh, that's not a bad idea. I think I said about nine things on your podcast that I'm now worried about. I should not have said that Indian bus restaurant joke. Oh, that's not a bad idea. I think I said about nine things on your podcast that I'm now worried about. I should not have said that Indian bus restaurant joke. No, no. Cooley dooly. I condoned it as a smartly Sri Lankan man, so that's fine.

He's the least Sri Lankan person I've ever seen in my life. You're practically translucent. I know. But listen, thank you so much for having me on. Dude, thanks for having me on. And you'll get on the... I just saw I don't have to do any editing because I don't think I've done anything bad on this one.

No, you get it. This is James Don't Force, Ken Catamaran, Plan. Thank you, everybody. Go and listen to that Phone Hacks podcast with Mike G and Nick Capper. Alright. Alright, and we'll talk to you soon. Thanks, everybody. Marlon Brando, 9-11 out now. And now, interview two, Electric Interview-a-loo. I'm joined now by Billy Oakley.

Just whipped my phone out at his Boys, Boys, Boys exhibition. Billy, I've come here a bit late and I've got half an eye on the car that's parked illegally out front. How has it gone? It's gone really well, honestly. It's been busy. It's been cool. I've enjoyed it.

You've sold work tonight. I have, yeah. Several. Several pieces. And this is wonderful. I'll give the details and have people come here. But I own a Billy Oakley myself. An original.

Oh, no. I wouldn't accept a duplicate. Well, I would because I love the work. But my hope is that you become more successful because I think I have an eye for talent. And I go, well, I'm going to buy this now. And I bought it at, I don't mind saying, because your work is worth more than this now. It is. $600, which is now worth at least double. So I'm wondering how can I make you even more successful so that the catamaran plan has...

Do you know what I'm saying? Like, if I make you a star, if I just fucking shoot you down in the street, suddenly my painting's worth big coin. Everyone listening needs to just, like, jump on and, like, get one, buy one as soon as they can. They're gone for red hot cheap. Well, not as cheap as I got it for

because your star is rising. It's reasonably priced. What I'd like to do is sit down with you for a long-form interview over a number of days to transliterate that into a book.

Do it. Then to release that book as like McCann on Ugly and then we sell that, right? Or we just bang that on Amazon or fucking whatever. We find like a little art house publisher

to do a short run. Good. But then the mystique grows. Yes, it does does and then i own and in exchange for it frank all i'll take from you is two more paintings yes to do it that's tax that's tax it's whatever's left over i take two more paintings there's tax listening back to this interview it is quite clear that james was drunk so sorry about that i love the piece the resistance but, the skeleton playing the PS3.

Thank you. That is the McDonald's. That is the hero piece. That's great. I love it. It's the main one. That's where the installation comes from. And then you've got, everything is true to life and sort of warped, but especially the

controller, right? Like the skull is not especially warpy. That's the only one where you're already playing with perspective in that way. Yes. Well, I sort of, you know, to be honest, when I got to the controller, I was like, I can't be f***ed. We're going to leave that out of the podcast so you seem like a better artist who's more exacting.

No, it's beautiful. I love the shoes. I love the... And this cunnilingal one. Yes, yes. With the Dada Ching. Yes. Yes, of course.

Well, it's important. They're the two most important things in life. And Christ is in the background? He is, yes. But with a veil over his face so he doesn't have to look directly at the cunnilingus Yes. Yes, of course. Well, it's important. They're the two most important things in life. And Christ is in the background? He is, yes. But with a veil over his face so he doesn't have to look directly at the cunnilingus? No, he does not. I don't think he would appreciate it. Well, I think that's, you know...

We can see him carrying the cross. Oh, we... Look, that's not only him there, but that's him there. Yeah, it's like a juxtaposition. It's like a movie poster. And using all your book-learning words on me to try and get me... I'm already bad at it. No, I think,

but you obviously have a difficult relationship with like iconographic Christianity. Yes, I do. I do, for sure. Yeah. Well, it's very ingrained into us as Westerners. It's very like deep into our system, being raised Catholic and all that sort of stuff.

And we're going to get, were you raised Catholic? No, I wasn't. And man, I pray for you. But the important thing, and we're going to do this, Paul, it's going to be great. All right, I'm stopping it now.

Now, what are the details of this show? It's Boys, Boys, Boys. It's open from the 23rd of September until the 16th of October. And where are we? Floating Goose Studios. Floating Goose Studios. That's it? Was there free wine here earlier?

Nah, you had to pay. Oh, no, that's all good now. It's just all good tonight. Thank you. bit now just over tonight thank you අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි �ប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប់ពីប្រាប� Bye.