The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - Amos Gill on JDFM

Episode Date: May 13, 2024

Amos Gill is on instagram: https://www.instagram.com/abitofamosgill/?hl=enJoin the sailing club to contribute financially to James Donald Forbes McCann's journey to boat ownership: https://www.patreon.com/jdfmccannBuy the several books written by James Donald Forbes McCann: https://www.jdfmccann.com/books Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan. If you'd like to listen to bonus episodes, go sign up to the Patreon. That's patreon.clom. Clom? Ah, we f***ed it. Anyway, look, you'll find a way. Catamaran Home! ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.

I'm Jessie Cruikshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture. But when I have questions, I get to phone a friend. I phone my old friend, Dan Levy. You will not die hosting the Hills after show. I get thirsty for the hot wiggle. I didn't even know what thirsty meant until there was all these headlines and i get schooled by a tween facebook is like a no that's what my grandma's on thank god phone a friend with jesse crookshank is not available on facebook it's out

now wherever you get your podcasts a cast helps creators launch grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere a cast.com Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com No, I just wanted to start again. Why don't you start podcasts the way that Marc Maron does? It's halfway through a conversation, man. I don't like that vibe. Why do we got to start with an introduction?

It's just happening. It's rolling. But people won't know who you are. have to know i'll introduce myself he's got barack obama on the podcast hello james i think you're doing amazing things this is your obama i ain't got very good impressions how dare you come in here and do a black voice you know what i found out is that snl did not have a cast member what do you mean he's indonesian um i uh they didn't have a black cast member when barack obama became president fred armisen is obama yeah fred armisen is the first jay farrow eventually i think they hired jay farrow but to begin with uh fred armisen is their barack obama and he does a pretty good obama and it's long enough ago that...

And they just didn't do blackface on him? No, they just left him as like a, I guess, Hispanic guy. I couldn't believe it. And then no one's gone back and looked at it, presumably, or left a comment. So there's no one to be like, that's what's inappropriate, aren't they? It was like, can you do that?

Can you have a white guy? I mean, I think Fred Armisen probably looks more like him than Kenan Thompson. Yeah. There's other things going for it. But if I do a Busta Rhymes impression, is that okay? Let's see it. I'd love to go for SNL. How fast can you go?

I'm Oprah. Have you heard BBL Drizzy yet? No. This is the end of the Drake-Kendrick feud. I'm done now. BBL Drizzy. No, you're going to love it. It's a song someone's brought up called

Everybody Pause This and Listen to BBL Drizzy and We'll Come Back. I'll just give you the context. Metro Booman, who's part of the feud, made a beat called BBL Drizzy. And it's like anyone can rap on this. And the best anti-Drake rap, you get $10,000 and the beat. You're crowdsourcing hate?

He's crowdsourcing the hate. And it's gone wild on the TikTok home. Let's play it. The best BBL in history. This cake will make you show up. I know you've seen his glow up. As BBL Drizzy. BBL Drizzy.

Hey, good. It's BBL Drizzy. That was awesome. Isn't that great? That's all. Now, what Drake has to do to come back is rap on BBL Drizzy. I do believe. His next diss has to be over the top of BBL Drizzy. He's got to make BBL Drizzy's next big single.

That's got to be. He's got to buy the rights. The best thing is to not even do a diss. Just make it a great hit and profit off it massively. It's too good a song. Make that a number one, huge smash, and then you just post how much money you made from it. Thanks.

One of the Kendrick ones was DJ Mustard. And it does go hard, and you can play that in the club. And then on Drake's response, he's like, Man, I would have danced on that in the club if you didn't call me a pedophile. A lot of music will be ruined for you if you were called a pedophile on it. Yeah, imagine you go to listen to Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, start a side B. James McCann is a pedophile.

Damn it, George! How you going to do me like that? I guess you say James is a pedophile today. Man. I used to love this song. Yeah, there we go. He's talking about young girls. Young girls.

Oh. Yeah, some of those songs you don't have to. Speaking of temptation. You don't have to speaking of temptation you don't have to push very well like Ringo's one of Ringo's

big singles was like you're 16 you're beautiful in your mind my dad's favourite song do you know who's in the video clip who Princess Leia

Carrie Fisher she's the 16 and beautiful girl he was right she's 16 and beautiful she picked it he picked it I can't stop So is that like

I don't keep tabs on it Yeah this is not me I don't know But it's hard to avoid any of this What? Did Drake win? Did Kendrick win? Or is it just a wash?

Shane is a huge Drake fan And he has been He went out I saw he went viral Because he said I think he's gonna be Yeah but that was at the time

When everyone was making jokes Five years ago Everyone was saying it Millie... Yeah, but that was at the time when everyone was making jokes about him. It was five years ago, everyone was saying it. Millie Bubba Brown. And someone said at the show, like, who do you reckon's winning the feud? Drake or Kendrick? Overwhelmingly, people think Kendrick has won,

even though he's never responded to the allegations that he's a wife basher. That's one of the Drake things. Drake's like, you hit your wife. And Kendrick's like, you're a pedophile. And it's like, the next one, Drake's like you hit your wife and Kendrick's like you're a pedophile and it's like the next one Drake's like

I'm not a pedophile are you going to address the wife beating what about the stuff where Drake said that his team who supposedly leaked information

it was a false leak I mean the way that these people talk it sounds like some 1950 CIA versus KGB it's Chase Bank double. It's Chase Bank. Double agent.

It's Chase Bank licking on Wells Fargo. Also, he could just have made that up. That would have been a good thing. That's something that I would 100% make up. You can only come back at that with the, you can't do the pedophile. Well, I actually leaked that I was a pedophile. So you'd say that. So now who's a big silly?

Deep fakes. Yeah. You bought into those deep fakes with me and Millie Bobby Brown. Ha! Idiot. I've got to say, this is the James Donald Forbes McCann catamaran plan. I'm trying to buy a boat. We did an episode just now.

It's on the Patreon. You can go and join the Patreon. We've been friends for... Since 2010? I don't know. Yes. And we've known each other for longer. Yeah.

We did not get along at first. This is true. And we've known each other for longer. We did not get along at first. This is true. But we've been very close friends. Well, just because James was a fat nerd. He makes some good points. You're the easiest man. And you wore linen shorts. Amos.

Big P. Amos, notoriously the easiest man in comedy to get along with. Everybody's best buddy. Amos Gill never has a hard word for anybody. I love you. You're the best man at my wedding. We've both done comedy. We're both trying to make it in the business.

We've never, we've tried a couple times when we lived together to do a podcast. Not really though. Because I was doing a radio show and every time you wanted to do a podcast, I was like, I'm tired. I don't want to do this.

There was one day where I drove, you drove me around your car and I set my phone up on the dashboard to record it. That's as close as we got to doing a podcast. I don't ever do, it's crazy. I did so many years of radio. Yeah.

And then I've just never. Oh, they absolutely wouldn't let me in that. They let me on the mic on the weekends for six months. Yeah, so I had a show and I had a period where I had some hand at the station. I tried to get James a radio show. You would call it hand. You would always call it. I have hand. i have hand i have hand and i gave james a hand and he he grabbed onto that hand and he did a radio show and he had a segment on there called horsing around where he would play a horse sound

effect going i thought it was a good segment i was never able to respect commercial radio enough to do anything but a bad parody. My favorite one was, where is the most shameful place to have hair? Where we would spin the wheel of hair. And people would go, oh, I reckon the big toe hairs. Here's a big one. Pretty shameful. The not so secret sound I did for a long time,

where I would tell people what it was, but then they had to guess something they couldn't hear. So I'd open a packet of chips and then say, what flavor are those chips? It's an iPhone. That's an AirPod case dropping. Call in. Hold on.

What kind of Apple? Is it the Pros? Is it the 2? Is it the Beats? So we had a very unsuccessful broadcast. For whatever reason, they wouldn't give me a proper job and we never got a proper podcast. We had a very unsuccessful broadcast career.

I will have inserted a radio stinger there. Here's my plan. We start our own commercial radio. We do it as a podcast, but we do it in commercial radio format. Can we still get our old bosses involved just to get some negativity around? I would get Jack involved for sure. Jack, button pusher Jack, has gone on to be, he was pushed out and then he went on to be the like, work on the top show. He was my favorite person.

He's like the guy, it was the anchor of the show. Was so obviously being bullied out of that station. And he was a legend and he made me feel great when we'd do the show and they were like, he has to talk less. He's now got the biggest podcast in Australia. He's got the biggest podcast in Australia. One minute remaining. Like the perfect example of a man who was unfairly picked on

and then just went, I'm going to be great and show all of you. I would get him involved in a heartbeat. I love him. Well, he would probably want to get involved. For those who listen to his podcast, he just calls inmates in American prisons from the Gold Coast in Australia

and just chats them and they're like, I didn't kill that bitch. He's like, okay. All right. All right, well, let's talk about what happened. And I was speaking to him about it and he's like, yeah, you do talk to a lot of them and you're like, I should probably do my research. I think you might have done that. He might have killed that woman.

He might have killed that bitch. He's like, it's a real gamble. Well, if he would do it, I mean, he's going to be a busy man. He's got a family. He's going to have too much on, but I think we should ask him. But here's my plan. We do a podcast. Amos Gill on JDFM because my initials form a radio station.

It ends in FM. I mean, that's a gift. And then we see if this is part of the catamaran. We do this under the catamaran plan. We see if a radio station in Australia will buy it and put it on as a national show. You're already thinking about selling us out to an

Australian radio station. Let's record it and if they go, hey, we'd actually like to put that on the air. It's like, alright, fine. Pay us the money. Then I buy a boat. I'd like you to have a sermon on commercial radio after some ads for national tiles you just come on and you talk about the gospel well look i i was meaning that was in my notes for if i was going to do the podcast alone i was going to talk about the book of mark which i had i don't think i'd ever read start to finish i'm really a gospel according to john guy and i rank the gospels

well john for me is number one and then uh luke probably number two matthew way down in the details you know that but mark mark is 16 chapters long it's not long it's like 20 pages it's super to the point it's super immediate it's like no jokes there's like there's some jokes in the other ones i think mark actually might do uh the bit where the one of the disciples has his robe come off and he has to run naked it's just sort of funny it's sort of funny anyway how many gospels were not accepted there's a couple yeah can you get a hold of them oh yeah they're around most of them are around I think and was it because of the quality of their writing

were they like we appreciate people at the time were just like this is not as good it's funny this is one of the arguments because the

Catholics Protestants go like it's it's the Bible everything has to come from the Bible and Catholics like yeah we made the Bible

there were all these books we didn't put in it and we had to write it there was a church before then so like how are you going to decide which books are in and out and the Protestants do like take out a couple books that they don't like because they it's like sola scriptura not that one not that one would have been wonderful if they had a really simplistic writer at the time just a real common man who was like there was a man called Jesus the son of god he died that there was some fish i gotta be honest that's pretty much what reading mark is like mark is like mark doesn't

do the birth mark doesn't do much after he comes back it's like john the baptist was there he was baptizing people our lord was baptized then he walked around did some miracles didn't want anyone to see about him then he went home People didn't like him there Went into Jerusalem They killed him He came back Yeah it's like asking your son What he did in school for the day And then

Then this happened But John is so poetic But anyway Mark I'm going to have to read Mark again To get more out of this You do that when I leave Because I've got to get ready for my show No of course

But I want to tell a story We can do some I think we should be allowed to do some of that On our radio show in Australia Why shouldn't we be allowed to do that? The pagans have had enough. We've got to fashion a cord and whip these money changers in the pit. You know what I'm saying?

I'm not saying money changers as Jews. They're all Jews in the temple. I saw a look when I said money changers that you thought I was being anti-Semitic. What I will say is that just the word commercial radio got into my head and I looked at you like this, dump. Because what you have to understand about commercial radio is there's just a culture of saying nothing. Of course.

You just look around at people. That's why when, you know, where do you keep the ketchup? Where do you keep the tomato sauce, pantry or fridge? That's a segment. That's a real segment you could do on commercial radio. Pantry or fridge. Call in, butter. Pantry or fridge. Yeah, what we don't's a real segment you could do on commercial radio. Pantry or fridge? Call in. Butter.

Pantry or fridge? Yeah, what we don't do is go, do you think interest is wrong? Hey, is usury always a sin? And what is usury exactly? Sonora, okay. How much of a vig is acceptable? Stick it in the bin.

That's like, for me, the archetypal Australian Commercial radio Podcast segment Not podcast Just radio segment Call up What do you want to Stick in the bin

Which is what we call The trash can Charity muggers People on the street That ask you to give money To charities Stick them in the bin Stick them in the bin

My shoes Stop My shoes hurt my feet Because they're too small Stick them in the bin Speaking of charity muggers We're walking today To go look at the Colorado Avalanches ballpark stadium. And a guy comes up to James and goes, do you care about, was it trees?

What was he getting us? It was animals. Animals. He kept asking about animals. And we all said, oh, no, we got to get somewhere. And out of nowhere, this charity guy just goes, hey, man, gingers don't have souls, but if you donate some money, you'll get it back. He was like, did you know 80% of gingers donate to charity?

And I say, oh, better men than I. And he goes, yeah, they're trying to buy their souls back because they don't got one. It's like, all right, mate. All right, I could. Truly, we're racially vilified. Are we going to get into it? You and I, you want to start a racial slinging match right here on the street?

I was happy to leave race out of it. Let's talk about 80% of... We've hit the dump button there. Snicket in the bin. We've hit the dump button. That's the sort of thing we'll be able to do on our podcast. Move it to the trash. Well, I'd like to talk about something before we all have

to go which is a cool experience you're really ready to get out the door it's only what time's your show oh this is gonna be

it's 4.50 4.50 you got time you got time yeah I gotta go shower and get ready hold on is this a new

talk break because if it's a new talk break we gotta do the stinger again I thought we were just doing a regular podcast

I love Post Malone oh yeah i truly love post malone and when i worked on radio i maybe was the only songs i was enjoying that we had to play and i had a mental breakdown in 2015 it was particularly bad i had a breakup and post malone's I Fall Apart had just come out and I was riding my bike up the Mount Lofty Hill and I fell off my bike and was sobbing, thinking about this relationship while Post Malone kept saying, I fall apart, I fall apart. It touched me deeply and I downloaded many of Post Malone's songs and rapped over the top of them.

You did that on commercial radio. And I ended up releasing one of the songs on commercial radio, which still to this day gives me what we call the douche chills. It's horrible. Here's a weird fact about that. There's a couple of weird facts about this. Your timing was so bad, I would stand with you in the booth and squeeze your shoulder when it was time to start the new rap line.

I'd just be wide-eyed, bobbing my head. You'd squeeze me and I'd go, I'm ballin', I'm ballin'. You've missed it. You've missed it. You've missed it. You're off the beat. It's the one in the three. And then also, you released that White Iverson rap cover.

And then as a joke, released it to a bunch of radio stations throughout regional Australia. And one of them really liked it and wanted to have you on as a rapper. And you were like, this is all a joke. And he took it wrong.

Do you remember this? Yeah, so I released this breakup song to White Iverson and it went, I'm bowling, I'm bowling, I'm all a joke. And he took it wrong. Do you remember this? Yeah, so I released this breakup song to Wyatt Iverson, and it went, I'm ballin', I'm ballin', I'm ballin' over you. And this guy's like, man, I think you got something. And I went on Mount Gambier radio, and this guy's like, hey, I got this new artist called Priv Ledge. That was my rap name.

Priv Ledge has just done this drop about how hard it is for men in a breakup. Hey, man, it's really good to have you on here. I think this song's going to help a lot of men through a difficult spot and i was like hey is this a pre-record and he goes yeah i go yeah man it's a it's a joke it's a bit it's a bit that i'm doing about mumble rappers and he was like well you don't have to make me feel like a dick about it basically like because he said he was a bit of a hip-hop expert in the area and like he had a hip-hop show and i was like, if you're singing my praises, your credibility is shot to pieces.

13, 10, 60, when have you gotten the wrong end of the stick? So anyway, that being said, it was an amazing experience for me to go and watch you perform at the Forum, which is wild. It's like near where I live and I drive past it all the time and it's the biggest artist in the world. I'm going to cut to it. 13, 10,60, when have you

been the plus one to get to see Post Malone? Well, James was performing there. It was really dope. Plus one of a plus one. I didn't know anybody there other than James and Shane and they were obviously about to go on and they've got responsibilities. So I'm lingering around. In the green room?

I'm in the green room and James, about 10 minutes before this had bummed a cigarette off post malone you've gone into full broadcast mode you're all your all the clip of your speaking you've gone back into being in a radio station this is great i'm even sitting up right yeah because i'm like the program director could be looking at me and i'm getting paid a lot of money and i'm slumping this is an important story about you meeting Post Malone. Let's get some sizzle on this one. I met Post Malone.

You met Post Malone. And I met Post Malone because you bummed a cigarette off him and then you had to go off and I just kept talking to Post Malone. He's the sweetest man. I had the rarest thing where, you know when you have a social, you're a bit socially anxious. Social blanket. He was my safety spot. Yeah. Which was wild.

Of all the people, and there was a hundred people backstage, the only person I was comfortable talking to about how awkward I was, was Post safety spot. Yeah. Which was wild. Of all the people, and there was 100 people backstage, the only person I was comfortable talking to about how awkward I was was Post Malone, who was kind of the same, who was the biggest sweetheart in the world, chatted to us for about two hours while the show was going on. And then afterwards... You're telling the whole story. You're driving this one.

I'm driving this one. I'll get to this bit. Afterwards, there was talk that Post malone was going to take some people to his studio to play us his brand new album and i thought over to me and he goes can i um can i come to see post malone uh and i'm like i mean i'm shane has been invited i have already asked if i can be invited i went to shane i said can i mustos come too? And Shane said, absolutely not. No. And then I was like, all right, I'll go and tell Amos.

But then before I could get there, he had already gone over to you and said, get in the car. You can come and sit by yourself. No, well, what happened was, is I just was like, okay, fine. Because I had a flight to catch at 6.30 in the morning. Yeah, it was a gift that you were being sent. So I was like, it is 2 a.m. I should probably just Uber home. And then Shane saw that I was Ubering and he was like, jump in the car.

He's the sweetest man. Sweetest man. So we go over to... The place where the studio is. You hit the dump button. James is making me hit the dump button because I revealed that it turns out... I wouldn't give out where it was. It turns out famous people live on the...

I'm going to keep dumping it. I'm going to keep on dumping you saying it. You wouldn't believe this. Stop it. Movie stars live... It's my podcast. Michaelordan has a home in chicago i don't think he does i don't think he does i just i i don't know what he's allowed and what's not allowed and i keep it all very tidy on the podcast sam aril's in new york oh yeah that's oh you're not gonna you don't care about Sam? I've never met Sam Mora. So anyway, we go to...

If it's someone I don't know, I'm happy to give out the exact coordinates of where they are. We go to the recording studio and you can talk us through the rest of this. It's one of those, I live in LA and I bitch about it all the time. We got there at like two in the morning. I bitch about it all the time.

But this was one of those reasons that you go, oh, there's some benefits to living in this town. Yeah, we got there at two in the morning. I bitch about all the time, but this was one of those reasons that you go, oh, there's some benefits to living in this town. Yeah, we got there at two in the morning and we're going to listen to the album. Post Malone just played his favourite songs for two hours. We were told we were going straight into the album, but he set the vibe of... And by the way,

he played a lot of great MGMT tracks. He played Little Dark Age. We were open about dancing. But as it came closer to 3am I thought, I'm going to have to go home now to the hotel and now I'm also doing a radio bit. Man, it's going to be so hard

to do a radio style show in a podcast type. The brain kicks in and goes, you're doing radio! He started playing the album at 3.30. It's great. like everyone's album though it's 16 tracks long if there had been one

dud track on the album I would have walked out and gone home because I was so tired it kept us going we just kept looking at each other doing the number one finger this is number one

yeah everyone kept throwing ones in the air Post Malone's new album is also I don't know in what state I was to judge it because again we listened to it at 4 in the morning I was absolutely hammered.

I was hammered. And I'd just done a huge arena show. We'd had so many barred lights. And we'd smoked a lot of cigarettes. And it was one of those experiences where you are like, is this great or am I just with the artist and I want this to be awesome? I think it's great. I've been thinking about it. And handily, one of the songs has come out since then.

It's like, oh, thank God. It's as good as I thought it was. I have played it. It's so good. I thought it was. I have played it. It's so good. So many times since I've been here in Denver. It's going to be the number one record. It is brilliant. And for me, I mean, I got this photo of you.

Yeah. Which I put on Instagram. And it's you. First of all, it's just like you sitting next to the recording desk and Post Malone smoking a cigarette. Yeah. And the DMs I got on that were, why does James look more like Post Malone than Post Malone? Yes, by not having a haircut and letting my beard grow out, I've accidentally come into a cool look.

And so I'm thinking... I'm getting the braids. I've got to get the braids. I got home to my girlfriend at 6am. I had to be at the airport by 6.45. Yeah. She was like, where have.45 yeah she was like where have you been

I was like I was at Post Malone's house listening to his new album that's why I smell of cigarettes I have not cheated on you I just listened to a man's album and she's like excuse me

I'm like gotta go I'll see you in New York JD FM and hey Moskiel we need songs on the podcast that was a good rave we call that a rave in the business.

James, you keep dumping me and starting again and telling me what the take has to be. I'm producing the show. No, you have picked up alpha energy off Shane Gillis. I don't like this music. Well, I will say this. In comedy, this is one of the reasons I never went along and got along. In any job that I've ever had, I'm the most relaxed.

I just don't care about the job. And I'll let everyone do their thing. Whenever it's a comedy thing, I become a fascist. Everything has to be the way I want it. Even if I can't explain why I want it that way. It's a real problem. It's closed a lot of doors. The brain takes over and goes, we're doing it this way.

You're the same. You're the same. Do you want to write me some lines for what I can say back to that I'll allow you to yes and yes and I think it's good for you to yes and I'm also a fascist

but it's got nothing to do with oh there you go we've run out of dump buttons we're not in delay anymore you've ruined the podcast we're very much in delay we're 13 years in delay if we're doing

JDFM it's more like 75 years in delay. 100 years. Oh, have you been listening to Hitler's AI speeches? Yeah. I have noticed, obviously I love X, I love Elon. I'm getting a lot of full Hitler speeches. It's a lot of Hitler's speeches translated into English,

read out by an AI, doing the cadences and the type of accent Hitler would have if he was an English speaker. I'm just not sure what people are doing on there, where they're playing a lot of Hitler hugging children and then giving speeches going, they denied you this information. No, I was aware that Hitler might have hugged a child and given a speech.

Yeah, I never doubted that he was a popular person. If that was all that was keeping you from becoming a fascist, was you were like, well, I don't think he ever would have given a speech, and I'm sure he never would have met a child. Oh, he did? No! Hold on, this guy seems all right.

They've been lying about him. He had a dog! We're going to need songs on the podcast slash radio show, if we do it. Here was my thought, because we want copyright free music I mean number one we could talk to our friend Post Malone

and just say can we just only play Post Malone songs he would help he'd probably give us the new album I mean the amount of streams on this podcast

would not hurt his financial bottom line at all but also wouldn't help and he's probably way too busy I think we got to meet Post Malone that one time

if I get to meet him again it'll be a great blessing do you think he will remember either of us uh yeah he seemed like one yeah one month i think so it seemed like the sweetest guy i i'm gonna go around saying that i'm personal friends with postman i have already said that to me i said it yesterday on an interview on the radio they said hey how you doing in denver i said I'm lucky to be here just the Post Malone's album party that he had

they go he had a party I go no wasn't really a party close friends only close friends only here's my thought for songs we could play on the podcast

we want copyright free songs one of the songs that is copyright free in terms of places you can get them is Wikipedia it's just going to be your synth album

no no no I can't write a is Wikipedia. It's just going to be your synth albums. No, no, no. I can't write a new song every... The show has got to be talk break, talk break, songs, talk break, talk break,

ads, songs. You know, you're going to have to have more songs than I can write. We go to Wikipedia and we find free songs on Wikipedia.

My thought was National Anthems. Okay. So we cut to... AFL theme songs also? I think thought was national anthems. Okay. So we cut to... AFL theme songs also? I think they're probably copyrighted. There's definitely

no way that you could... Because otherwise people would just be doing ads for like Balfour's Pies. We're the pride of South Australia. We're the mighty Balfour's Pies.

We are better than the village. What's your favourite country to travel to, ever? No, let's just pick... You're Croatian. I'm Croatian. Do you want the Croatian anthem?

Let's hit the Croatian anthem. Let's hit it. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the national anthem of the Republic of Hrvatska. This one dropped in the 90s. Oh, you can play... Hey, we can play old national anthems too. We can play like

the Yugoslavian anthem but you don't just say like on radio you don't go here's the anthem you just sort of fade out

we gotta laugh I don't know I'll introduce it I'll have it fading up here we haven't had one of those we have to say

something really funny © BF-WATCH TV 2021 J.D.F.M. Radio here with Amos Gill for Breakfast. What was that? You're going to love what that song was called. That was the anthem of Yugoslavia. Do you know what it's called? No. It's called Hey Slavs.

Is that what it is? Yeah, it's called Hey Slavs. Which is a breakfast TV show there now. Does hey mean something different in that country? Hey Slavs. Look at this. Hey Slavs. We've had to hit the dump button again. We've had to hit the dump button again.

We've had to hit the dump button once again. The thing is, where I grew up as a Croatian, I'm in this Facebook group called Croatians in Australia. Oh, yes. And if anyone says anything gay, what?

The biggest insult back is, you go. You go. Which is their version of saying, you're a lefty communist so you'll say something like hey you know goran ivan isovich croatian legendary tennis player okay he coaches for was coaching for a while novak djokovic a serb and people will be like how dare goran i will spit on his face in melbourne and then all right hey maybe they're just friends and we don't have to hate every Serb.

You go. You go. And that comment will get like 35 thumbs up and they go, communists aren't welcome here. I've said it before and I've said it again. Croatians are mean, strange, hostile people. And don't forget the big heads. Now, do you consider yourself a Slav?

Are Croats like, we're European? Or do they go, no, we're Slavs? I believe we're Slavs. It's undeniable. Well, I don't know. Hitler didn't think we were Slavs. Is that true? Well, he hated the Slavic people, but he gave us our independence.

How often is this podcast slash radio show going to come back to nice things that Hitler's done for your people? Listen, I need to see corporate sponsorship around me to not bring up Hitler. We better... Until we get San Remo pasta... Let's try and find a deal. Let's try and find some sort of... No, but quite frankly, because Croatians are very mixed looking.

There's people that are blonde, hairless... All over the shop. The only way you can definitely tell that a person is Croatian is that they are starting a fight with a stranger for no reason. JDFM!

Am I skilled? Yeah, I guess we're done talking about that. No, no. I'm sorry, that was punching out. That was always a big thing on radio. You've got to respect the out. You've got to talk for two and a half minutes and then any time after about two minutes

someone says something that might be funny enough, you've all got to laugh really hard and play the stinger. And then you take off your headphones and go, we got away with it again. I thought maybe just nothing would happen that time. But luckily, we all started talking really loud. And then someone laughed hard and we played the stinger. Someone made an inflection with their voice like this. And that was it.

We found a way out. Frankly, all we need. Yeah. Okay. So anyway, my point is is If we are going to do National anthems I think countries That don't exist anymore

Is good That's nice We could do Prussia Yeah we can do Actually a lot of Small German countries Throughout the We could play the

Australia I remember What's that? Well that country's dead Meet me down By the jetty landing Where the pontoons bump and sway. I never know what he's saying there. Bump and sway?

We tried to play that at the Post Malone party and you were like, don't do it. It's too slow. Taking the AUX cord from Post Malone, that was my biggest... I saw you getting ready to snatch the aux cord out of Post Malone's hands. I thought that would be a mistake.

I would say the most audacious aux cord theft in the world. As a man who's playing his own album and you go, oh. Do you want to hear some Australian rock from the early 1980s? You go, powder finger? I'm pretty autistic. People are accusing me of being autistic at the moment in the uh i'm getting accused of autism in australia but even then i'm i'm not so autistic

that i would think snatching an orc squad away from post malone is a cool move i was like what if i show him a good song and that might cement the friendship like he'll be like this guy's hey he's got good taste amos who in in America is able to say your name correctly? Nobody. Well, because they've got the famous Amos cookies. So I got to roll with that. Amos cookies. There's a cookie that's more famous than me.

And so he sets the tempo. He sets the, he decides how my name is spoken. You had them. Is it Amos? Amos. Amis. Amis. Like Amos and Andy.

Amos, yeah. But I keep saying to people, Amos. And they go, Amos. And I go, Amos? Amos. Amis. Amis. Like Amos and Andy. Amos, yeah. But I keep saying to people, Amos. And they go, Amos. And I go, Amos. Just go with Amos. Say whatever you want to say. It doesn't matter. Yes.

You know how you can tell if someone in America has been to Australia? They'll call it Melbourne. They won't say Melbourne. Melbourne. They'll go. They'll be talking like this. And then they'll go, but I was in Melbourne. Melbourne. Like a pastry. Melbourne. They'll go, they'll be talking like this and then they'll go, but I was in Melbourne. Melbourne.

Like a pastry. Melbourne. So James, we've got to go off to our shows, our respective shows. Oh, I thought that was a tight riff. J.D.F.L. Yes, we've got to go and do our shows.

I have to have a shower. I'm thinking about doing that. I've got to blow a lot of snot out my nose. James is trying to not masturbate. We speak about that more on the podcast over on the Patreon. I mean, look, this is still the James Donald Forbes, McCann catamaran plan, but I really think we should do something together of this nature

to try and make money. Maybe when we're... It's so much easier lying on a bed and talking to you. But maybe if we're more energetic. You think we're more energetic? I'm very tired. It's been an extremely difficult And taxing week For me to watch my friends succeed

And a man must wrestle With his envy And that burns some calories I've never felt anything But good about your success Of course I feel good About your success No I want you to know

I've never been jealous Of you one time Do you know what my girlfriend said What did she say I said ah man It's like I'm doing this My Netflix show Is like 20 people

Yeah I'm just This is just not What did she say What did she say And she said James has a family I'm doing this. My Netflix show is like 20 people. Yeah. I'm just, this is just not. What did she say? What did she say? And she said, James has a family and has struggled and has watched you at arenas and have a radio show and buy a house. You can sit and enjoy his success.

She's a good woman. And she said. She's a good woman. And she said, and it'll make you feel good as well. And the best part of my whole week was when you fumbled that trans joke, you dumb... Why must you make me hit the button? Why must you make me hit the delay button?

No, it's honestly... I did. Listen, I fumbled the joke. That's the worst one. So I come out and sometimes I'll go, I go, I'm fat and I'm poor. It's my opening. And then I go,

well, I was fat and poor in America. Sorry, I was... The button on myself there as well. Yeah, I'll come fat and I'm poor. It's my opening. And then I go, well, I was fat and poor in America. Sorry, I was... The button on myself there as well. Yeah, I'll come out and I'll say, I'm fat and I'm poor. Now that I'm in America though, I'm just poor. As if to say like, I'm not fat anymore because you're so fat. But a couple of weeks ago, I did come out and say, I'm fat and I'm poor. Well, I was fat and poor in Australia.

Since I've come to America, I'm just fat. And it was like, just people sat waiting to see where I was going with it. And I was like, it's a bad one to open with. There's a lot of communities that have not recovered since Hurricane Katrina. None of them got skinny. Not one of them got skinny. So anyway, it's been awesome. Every Australian who would talk to me

would be saying how cool it is. Let's not pump Aaron to the tires. It's a great thing. It's a beautiful thing. Gilly, you're an inspiration. I'm not pumping Aaron

Are we doing the podcast? We're going to have to do it remotely because you're in LA. I was trying to set you up. Are we doing, for what? To say something nasty about how you're going

to blow it and go home. Don't feel the need. I think we could do Amos Gill on JDFM. I think that's a serious radio show that we should think about. Absolutely. Well, when are we doing the next one?

In a year. Well, this will come out on the Catamaran Plan because I do need a Catamaran Plan episode. And it's so much easier just talking to a person than doing all the sound. I love doing the editing. I'm worried about doing that. You've got an audience now.

And I listen to Tim Dillon's show and anytime he has a guest, I'm like, I'll hunt them down and hurt them with a brick. Yeah, some of the podcasts I've been on, people have been less than positive.

Although, on the Matt and Shane podcast, people have been super nice. I love the dogs and I think about 95% of the dogs don't mind me. 5% of the people go, it's not as bad as Wolfie.

When Wolfie went on, why are you just rubbing, you've been rubbing your dick. I have a squat rock. You've been rubbing the dick for the whole podcast you just rubbing? You've been rubbing your dick. I have a squat rock. You've been rubbing the dick for the whole podcast. I've been trying not to talk about it. I have a squat rock. Let's end this podcast and you can go and get a credit card and scrape it off.

This is unappealing. It's a non-visual component. 131060, what's the worst genital disease that you've ever accumulated? James McCann used to cut his toenails at my house and put it in cups of tea and then forget to empty out the cup of tea. Yeah, I don't want to put them on. It's not like I was drinking the tea. I just wanted to put them somewhere. I had a girlfriend move in with me and she

was like, that guy's got to go. Alright. Smells. Alright. Yeah, she did kick me out of the house. You say that. She never kicked you out. She was so hostile that I had to move out. She was hostile to me too. I left my... But I didn't leave. I was stuck. I left my bookshelves there thinking that I would come back and get them.

By the time I came back, she'd used them as a shoe rack. She was some Imelda Marcos type woman. I always held that against her. Nice lady. Wish her the best. She was very passive. You know what?

Man, fine. It's a longer podcast than I thought it was going to be. We were both messy we would both leave our stuff all over the house no no she would come over listen you are messy and dirty listen she would come over she would go through the living room she would put all my things in a box put that box by my door and leave all your crap spilled out over the living room one of the nastiest i could never bring myself to say hey hey, how about you step the fuck. We've had to hit the button again there.

How come you can't stop doing that? I never. I just left. What? I just left. I just left that. That's all. She's got a family now.

Good for her. She had a family. Yeah. Good for her. She had a kid. When we broke up, she said, I need to have a child with someone. And then she moved to Greece and partied for three years. I years i thought hmm i thought you were leaving me for a child oh she's putting down the important groundwork there yeah anyway look the sterile a muscule one of your best bits is about not having

i don't think i can have kids and i want them we can't do that joke on this podcast i'm not thinking it's a joke but i want them well you should go and get your ejaculate tested. Eh? You should get your ejaculate tested. Where? Hmm? Do you have to pay for that? All right, we're back.

All right, there's been a lot of... J.D.F.M. Do you want to whisper the Amos Gill part? With Amos Gill. Yeah, there you go. That's a... Look, that's 38 minutes. That's longer than I would ever usually do for a podcast.

Well, you're going to have to chop that down. No. There's a lot of problems there No we've edited that In real time I'm an unpleasant person To talk to Yes comedy was a strange choice No you're a

I think you're a You're a great I was just I was yes anding I didn't know we were Still doing a bit Come on I thought the podcast

Had ended You're a great You're a great broadcaster I think the people Will write in with many comments I don't know Get a boat Amos Kill is great

This is part of getting the boat It used to be about a boat Listen I'm finding That the concept Of a man talking alone About a boat podcast When people come in And they listen to it

They stay We build a big cult audience A lot of people Just want to listen To two bros Wild out And I think we should Perhaps have a side podcast

What about instead Of the catamaran plane A lot of edits But I think a really strong first episode. James won't let me say what I want to say. Well, maybe on a future podcast. You know, doing a commercial radio show, Gilly, is not about saying what you want to say. It's about making the thing that's going to cut through

and get the big mainstream audience on board. And that's what we're about here on Amos Gill on JDFM. It's about women who work in PR. It's about women who work as office managers coming home. Who is our listener? Who's the target? The target audience. See, my podcast, 90% men.

90% men. This could finally be the podcast for the ladies. Gilly brings the chicks. Mother's Day is coming up. Happy Mother's Day To all the mums James has got the fat autistics What? Yeah

I'll bring in the fat autistics You bring in the Or chicks Sticks Or chick sticks That's not strong Hey Moskiel JDFM

Hey that was a 40 minute podcast And there's another Half an hour We keep saying this It was another half an hour On the Patreon 20 minutes of this podcast Is you saying how many minutes we've done already.

I'm anxious to get to the end. Goodbye everybody. Catamaran ho! ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessie Kirkshank and on my podcast Phone A Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture, but Here's a show grandma's on. Thank God Phone a Friend with Jesse Crookshank is not available on Facebook.

It's out now wherever you get your podcasts. ACAST helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. Everywhere. ACAST.com.