The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - An honourable decision

Episode Date: February 5, 2023

Buy tickets to the most censored Adelaide Fringe show of 2023 (that I am aware of (and also it is not censored anymore)): https://adelaidefringe.com.au/fringetix/the-james-donald-forbes-mccann-catamaran-plan-extravagan-za-af2023Tickets to the Melbourne trial show: https://www.trybooking.com/events/landing?eid=1015944&fbclid=PAAaaMNkEJt9NLX9jhTzWaTx3mk5SuPJEocHrSUeN7Lxtl8DqD_NoT1kLwFPEAnd the Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/jdfmccann Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan. If you'd like to listen to bonus episodes, go sign up to the Patreon. That's patreon.clom. Clom? Ah, we f***ed it. Anyway, look, you'll find a way. Catamaran Home! free data, big savings on plans, and having your unused data roll over to the following month. Every month. At Fizz, you always get more for your money. Terms and conditions for our different

programs and policies apply. Details at Fizz.ca. Hey, it's Mitch from SideNote Podcast, and I'm here to tell you about the new Google Pixel 9 powered by Gemini. Anyone who knows me knows the Pixel has always been my favorite out of all the phones I've ever had. Now, with Gemini built in, it's basically my personal AI assistant. the phones I've ever had. Now with Gemini built in, it's basically my personal AI assistant. Since I'm truly terrible at keeping up with emails, I use Gemini to give me summaries of my inbox, which is a lifesaver. And if I'm feeling stuck creatively, I just ask Gemini for help and bam, instant inspiration. You can learn more about Google Pixel 9 at store.google.com. Breaking news happens anywhere, anytime. Police

have warned the protesters repeatedly, get back. CBC News brings the story to you as it happens. Hundreds of wildfires are burning. Be the first to know what's going on and what that means for you and for Canadians. This situation has changed very quickly. Helping make sense of the world when it matters most. Stay in the know. CBC News. Ladies and gentlemen, it's been a fabulous week for the James Donald Forbes McCann Cameron plan victory. Victory for the underdog. It's been such a difficult week to get to the point of the victory. I was scared.

I was humbled. I was pleased. I was filled with hubris, striding around like a madman, telling people that I would crush them like bugs. It's been a good week, basically. I think when I look back on the last week, boy, it was a good one. And I'd like to fill you in on how it's all gone. So what do I need to tell you to make sense of this story?

Well, if you've never listened to the podcast before, hello. My name is James Donald Forbes McCann. I'm trying to buy a boat. That's the long and short of it. $500,000, and I'm trying to use my plans and my podcast to buy a boat. That's long and short of it. $500,000, and I'm trying to use my plans and my podcast to buy a boat. As a part of that, as a comedian, I'm doing a show on the Adelaide Fringe, the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Blanc Extravagan. Tickets are on sale to that now.

Tickets also on sale now to a show I'm doing in Melbourne in March to trial material for that show in front of a much smaller audience so that if any of it's bad, you know, it's only like 40 people who are having a bad time rather than 600 people. And even then, it's a 600-seat room. That doesn't mean we're necessarily going to get 600, but we're a lot closer to getting 600 people in there now because of the victories that have occurred this week.

I made the poster for the show. I sent it off to my manager. He sent it off to the designer. And I had a photo that I wanted them to replicate with my face. It was anti-Japanese propaganda from the Second World War with a Javanese soldier threatening to bayonet the great nation of Australia. And I had him taken out and he was replaced with me threatening to come to South Australia. And behind me was the quite exciting Japanese flag, the Rising Sun flag.

Japanese flag, the rising sun flag that you may know from the headband, just doing the, just quickly doing the car window up there because I think I was being too loud and I, it is 1230 at night and I'm sitting in a Volvo on the street again. So not so much victory that that has stopped happening. This remains my office. So there's a rising sun flag on the poster. I submitted that poster to the Adelaide Fringe. They rejected it on the grounds that it might incite hatred, either homophobic, racial. They just said it'll incite hate.

And then they listed a bunch of different things that people might hate and i didn't see anything hateful about my poster i changed the uh the sun to a happy yellow sun instead just to get something going and working but um i decided that i would having no no First Amendment rights, see if I could do something in the court of public opinion. So I spoke to my friend Sam, who's my lawyer this week, and I wrote a press release that I was going to send out to all the media of Adelaide detailing my struggle. So I sat down with Sam to see if any of it was defamatory. And so I think it's a good place to start with the story.

This is the conversation that we had. I'm joined here today by Samuel McDonough. Sam. Good afternoon, James. How do you do? I'm very well. Repeat listeners will know you as a top professional lawyer. Oh, will they?

I think you're in the first episode as my lawyer, giving me legal counsel. Yes, yes, yes. Free legal advice, I think, is my specialty. Free legal advice. Free for me. Very costly for pedophiles. But, and all, well, accused pedophiles. Accused, yeah.

Until they're convicted. Which with you, who knows? Maybe they never will be. I've written a press release for this thing, and I wanted to run it by you before I send it off to the media. Hit me. All right. So if anything seems defamatory or should be clarified,

let me know and we'll tidy it up. All right. Title, Adelaide Fringe bans beloved Japanese flag and is accused of anti-Japanese racism. Yeah, I think that's an interesting start because is it a beloved Japanese flag? People have died for it. Beloved by whom?

The living? And the dead. I'm sure some people are very, very in favour. People, yeah, people, I bet we could find someone who loves it. You should probably explain which flag we're talking about. It's the rising sun flag of the Japanese... Imperial Army of World War II, right? Yeah, but also other things, like the current day Maritime Self-Defence Force.

Is that beloved by all Japanese people or a very niche group? Now, come on. In a perceived slight, not a niche group. I mean, they have it, right? Yeah, they do. I'm not out here saying the Japanese are a uniform people. I'm out here saying that at least some Japanese people love that flag. And it's the official flag of Japan.

And who am I to say, oh, Japanese, get over it, change your flag. It's a cool flag. Yeah, I had no doubt about that. But you think calling it beloved is? Yeah, I think that's a stretch. What would you say instead of beloved? Notable? I could just say Japanese flag. I think that's perhaps. Less adverbs is usually the way to go, isn't it?

Adelaide Fringe bans Japanese flag and is accused of anti-Japanese racism. Yeah, and I assume you're the one accusing them of the anti-Japanese racism. Yes, again, I'm trying to make it seem like a... Yeah, I mean, it's me, James Donald Forbes, but I don't want to make myself the... I don't want to be narcissistic. No, no, no, no. You're reporting on your own accusation, though.

I'm accusing them of anti-Japanese racism. Yep, yep. Okay. That's tough. In a perceived slight to Japan and the Japanese people I'm perceiving it The Adelaide Fringe has banned the use of an ancient Japanese symbol At their upcoming festival

A performer at the 2023 festival James Donald Forbes McCann Planned on using the Japanese rising sun symbol In the poster for his show The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan Extravagan Zah Zah However the Fringe has declared it will not tolerate the rising sun

and has demanded that he change the design. Yeah, I think at that point you should probably include what they said about it. Yeah. Yeah, I don't have that on me. And my manager's flying to Perth at the moment, so I'm scrambling to get that, but I think that's a good point. I am shocked by the Adelaide Fringe's decision, says James. I don't expect the Fringe to stand up for freedom of speech.

Freedom of speech isn't particularly trendy at the moment, and no sensible person would expect a government-funded arts festival to defend the artist's right to self-expression. But I didn't expect this. I am appalled by the Adelaide Fringe's flagrant act of anti-Japanese racism. I put flagrant there because it's like flag. Yeah, no, that's very clever. Thank you.

Japan has been disrespected and the Fringe has brought shame and dishonour upon itself. I don't know. In my opinion, that's in quotation marks. Yeah, yeah, no, I understand. But you did shame and dishonor in a slight accent at that moment, and I suspect you were kind. No, no, no, there was no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

There was no. Come on, there was no. Please. Please, shame and dishonor. I was just giving those words the emphasis that was their due. No accent was used. No. No accent at all.

No, and they don't reflect any kind of stereotypical attitudes towards anybody. I think, no, separate from anything that might be in a caricature of anybody, I think it's very dishonourable. Alright, great.

The symbol of the rising sun has been used by the Japanese for hundreds of years. True. Today, it serves as the naval ensign for the Japan Maritime Self-Defense Force, who work closely with the Australian Navy. As recently as last year, Australia and Japan entered into an historic defence pact together. The rising sun flag is a treasured symbol for Australia's ally.

James Donald Force McCann has performed at every Adelaide Fringe Festival for over a decade. Before this incident, his relationship with the Fringe had been uniformly positive. He has won several awards and has even been selected as a grant... There's a little typo there I have to fix. At a grant recipient. As a grant recipient. Yes. That's pretty good.

Thank you. Not in a couple of years, but... Quote, If it were just an insult to me, I'd stay silent. I don't like drama and would really prefer to have a positive relationship with the Adelaide Fringe. But this isn't about me. This is about the people of Japan. I think you should get rid of the I don't like drama part because that's just a lie.

I can see why someone would say that. All right. I'd stay silent because I would. It was just about me. I really would prefer to have a positive relationship with the Adelaide Fringe. I mean, I love drama in the sense of going to the theatre. And being in the theatre, and being on stage.

Yeah, that sort of drama. But real life drama, when someone calls you late at night, and they go this guy, you've got to not talk to him anymore, he's a dog. You know, this sort of interpersonal hubbub. You're above the reality television level drama. I'd be terrible on reality television. I'd never have any drama.

Wouldn't engage with any of them. Married at first sight and it'd just be like, we're very happy. We're making it work. But we're not going to talk into the cameras about our problem. That's an immature way to address a marriage. It's a sacred bond between her and I. It's a sacred bond between this woman that I've just met. Now, if you'll excuse me, we're having our sex ceremony.

That's weird. They do that. Don't they give them a box of sex toys and put them in a bed together or something? I've never watched it. I've never watched it. Australia is watching. Yeah, right. Yeah, beat Australian Survivor by like 400,000 people.

Your dad loves watching maths. I'm sure he does. But, I mean, I suppose you and I are talking about whether or not this particular Japanese flag should have been banned at an Adelaide Fringe Festival, whereas the rest of people are talking about the sex ceremonies and maths. Do you think there might not be a huge audience?

Do you think I should have written a press release about maths? I think that might have been more interesting to other people. Well, yes, we'll see. We'll see how we go. This may not sell any tickets. Not that that's the point. The important thing is not to sell tickets, it's to have justice. No, as you've said, it's not about you at all.

Did I say at all? It isn't about me, semicolon. This is about the people of Japan. About's one of those funny words. Now is about the people of Japan. About's one of those funny words. Now, you'll enjoy this one. As Martin Luther King Jr. said, injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.

I am standing up against this injustice perpetrated against Japan. I am sure the Adelaide Fringe will want to do the right thing, so I've outlined three actions they can take to make restitution and restore their honor. The Adelaide Fringe should apologise not merely to James Donald Forbes, McCann, but to the nation of Japan. Yes. Approval should be given to James to re-release his original poster featuring the rising sun. Yep. The Fringe should hire a new full-time member of staff, a Japanese sensitivity officer,

to ensure that an abuse of this nature never happens again. Yeah, I think these are all great ideas. Okay. That they'll ignore, right? I believe that they'll do the right thing. Which one of those is the right thing? All of them. Yeah, okay, I understand.

Now, can you see anything in there that is defamatory? Against anyone but you? No. That I could be the subject of... Oh oh that i'm defaming myself indeed oh no that's fine i can't bring a lawsuit against my own manic episode that's not can you do that i don't have to pay my own damages minus legal it doesn't wouldn't make any sense well that's what i've currently. Is there anything that you think should go in there to add context? I mean, a response from the Adelaide Fringe in what they precisely said about you can't have this. Yeah, I've got to get the exact quote of what they've said. Because at the moment you're just talking about something,

but anybody reading this doesn't know exactly what you're talking about. So I've hit up the manager and I've said, look, what exactly did they say? He's in a flight to Perth at the moment. It's a long flight to Perth. All right, but as soon as he's landed, I'll get that and we'll insert that there. And then I think we've got some media interest. Yeah.

Have you spoken to like the Japanese consular or anything like that? I think that might be the role of a journalist. I'm not sure. Well, I think you think that might be the role of a journalist. I'm not sure. Well, I think you've kind of assumed the role of a journalist here. You've spoken about yourself in the third person. Press release. I think that's a common occurrence for a... I don't know.

No, I think when I was working as a... I mean, I'd have someone write it for me usually, so I've had to downsize. Yeah, maybe I should... Well, next step, talking to the... I spoke to a... A someone write it for me, usually. So I've had to downsize. Yeah, maybe I should... Well, next step, talking to the... I spoke to a Japanese man who wrote to me. And he said, I'm sorry that they've banned your poster. The comedian?

Yeah. Well, I won't say which one. Because I then said, will you go public about this? And he said, no. I don't want to talk about it. Because he's a polite Japanese man. And the last time that they blew up over a national point of honour ended very badly.

Yeah. So I understand. Fool me once. Tight behaviour there. So, all right, we'll send that off. You were asking me some questions about this before. Just sort of broader questions. Like, why am I doing this?

Oh, yeah, to what end? What are you hoping to achieve? Do you think anything will happen? No. Well, I understand you spoke to somebody at the advertiser. I did. Well, let's find out what happens with that. He seemed on site, and then I spoke to your lawyer mates

out front of the pub. They seemed friendly about it. Ex-member of Parliament was absolutely appalled. He was talking about how once upon a time the fringe itself were putting out the posters that were pushing the frontiers of... He was talking specifically about how great it was that they degraded the Madonna. Yeah. Not just the pop starlet, but the mother of God.

Yeah. I don't think I'm able to invoke that. No. That's for others to do. Yeah, I don't even think his point was good. Yeah, look, he's had a couple of drinks. He was very passionate when he said that as well. Yeah, he was very passionate, very passionate.

You can see how he was a member of the Legislative Council. Honestly, who couldn't become a member of the Legislative Council? I've thought about becoming... That might be next time around I'll run for Senate. You could use the posters then. That would be cool. But then I have to get into an embroiled in a fiasco with the Electoral Commission. Yeah, yeah.

Man. Policy number one. Demolish that Mawson Lakes re-establish the Metropolitan Multifunction Polis. The Japanese city we were going to have. Oh, of course. That's right. Yeah, yeah. I forgot about that.

We often do that the Japanese were going to buy our land and have their own city inside Adelaide. It'd be pretty cool. Yeah. I wonder if it would have been their laws or our laws. We could take the train to Japan. Excuse me. I'm just pumping into Japan. Alright, it's getting now hot in this car.

I should let you go. But thank you for listening to that. I feel a lot better about it. Of course. I tried to write it in a politique fashion. Do you think I can go further anyway? You highlighted dishonourable as a loaded term, maybe. Well, perhaps in the context it could be read in certain unflattering ways.

Might make me seem like I'm being ironic in some way. Yeah. When in fact I'm not being ironic. No, you're being entirely true and honest. Honest truth. I am offended on behalf of the people of Japan Despite having not consulted or spoken to too many of them I'd be pretty upset about it

Someone banned the Australian flag That we used during World War II I think it's the same flag Yeah Exactly They have the same flag. Yeah. Exactly. They have the same flag. They never, they didn't have to get rid of the emperor.

It's not like Germany. Like, I understand that, what I assume has happened is some bureaucrat at the Adelaide Fringe has had an unsophisticated response. And it's very easy just to say no. Yeah, of course. And they didn't expect to have any repercussion. No. But you're going to give them their repercussions in the form of this press release.

Yeah. Well, I mean, what should we do? Should we just suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune or do we stand up and we say,

that's absurd. That's a chill on freedom of speech. This is a term I've found in legal circles a lot where people are like, it has a chilling effect. Like, that it might encourage people not to do something that they want to do that is one of their freedoms, but it doesn't directly get in the way of it.

And so you don't say, this is an affront to freedom of speech. You go, this chills freedom of speech. And it's like a much lower thing to accuse somebody of. But do you find this? Yeah, well, I mean, I think in this particular instance, you should definitely take them to task on the point, particularly when you are selling tickets to this show. You think the timing of it is convenient,

that I'm selling tickets to the show? I mean, when else would you put out a poster other than when you had a show out? I mean, I think anybody who drew that kind of inference would be too cynical. You think I'm... You're in a random bad way of saying, I'd like people to buy tickets to the James Earl,

Forsbacan, Catamaran plant, Extravagan. Tickets are on sale now. Royalty theatre. We've got a lot of tickets left to sell. There's a link down below. Buy tickets immediately. And support free speech. Yeah, specifically my free speech.

I don't care about other people's free speech. I don't care if anyone goes to their show. But come to my show. Yeah. The guy from the advertiser did ask why is there a Japanese flag on the poster? You haven't read the show yet, so that must have been hard. Yeah.

Yep. Yeah, it's tough. All right, well, it's been great. I've written bits of it. I've got costumes. There's a panda costume. What? No, go on.

No, there's a panda. Some of the show's about euthanasia and it involves a story about a panda. Right. Like youth in Asia? Yeah, he's a young panda in Asia. Right. Well, there you go.

Then the Japanese flag kind of makes sense. That's a totally different part of the show. It has nothing to do with it. I'm going to let you go. I'm going to let you go. All right. If you're looking for flexible workouts, Peloton's got you covered. Summer runs or playoff season meditations, whatever your vibe,

Peloton has thousands of classes built to push you. We know how life goes. New father, new routines, new locations. What matters is that you have something there to adapt with you, whether you need a challenge or rest. And Peloton has everything you need, whenever you need it. Find your push. Find your power. Peloton. Visit Peloton at onepeloton.ca. Breaking news happens anywhere, anytime. Police have warned the protesters repeatedly, get back. CBC News brings the story to you as it happens.

Hundreds of wildfires are burning. Be the first to know what's going on and what that means for you and for Canadians. This situation has changed very quickly. Helping make sense of the world when it matters most. Stay in the know. CBC News.

Now something did happen. Something did happen from that press release. I'm back in the Volvo now. Sam's gone. Just to let you know. I'm just turning the light on so I can cover properly what did happen. And what happened was the advertiser wrote a story about it on page 8. Page 8! wrote a story about it on page eight. Page eight. That's one of the top 10 best pages

in a newspaper. Best page is the front cover. Next best page is the back cover. Page number three is page number two. Page number four is page number three. Page number five is page number four. Page number five is page number four. Page number six is page number five. Yeah, page number seven is, I think, inside back cover. The eighth best page would be inside back cover, other one. You know, but basically we're in the top, I would say, 15 or so best pages of the newspaper. And we've got a big full-page story. Opening it up now.

Fringe Sees Red Over Rising Sun. And I'm going to read the story to you now, like that radio station that reads out the newspaper for the blind, but with more commentary. So now I will say another thing. Before this story came out, the fringe called me, Heather Crowell from the fringe called me and she said, listen, I've just heard about what's happened. Tell me what your show's about. And at that point, if I wanted to maximize media coverage, I should have hung up the phone because I knew a story was coming. And it would have been like, that's the first story. They've banned him.

And I thought, if I explain myself now, there's a chance they'll reverse their decision right now and either I won't get a story or they'll just be the one story because it'll be open and closed. So I did answer the phone. I did speak to her. And Heather was just extremely decent and reasonable. And actually, I'm a big fan.

I've always been a big fan of the Adelaide Fringe, aside from this one minor altercation. A minor altercation in which I'm pulling an insane face in the advertiser on a four-page ad. All right. So we'll read the story. But she did call. She was reasonable. I told her what the show was about or some version of what the show was about because I haven't actually written very much on the show yet. And so that comes across in the article as well.

And the press release too. So I called the advertiser and I explained the thing and then I sent them the press release. And you'll see they've used some of the press release, but mostly they've focused on other elements. And also they've focused on conversations I had with the journalist over the phone. I didn't know I was on the record but I could have guessed. Okay, but I didn't say anything heinous. Patrick McDonald, arts editor.

And a fine arts editor he is. Adelaide Fringe banned a comedian's poster which depicted part of the Japanese rising sun flag for being potentially offensive, despite a similar graphic appearing on its own poster, but reversed the decision late on Thursday. Now, I will say, yes, the front of the Fringe Guide, it has been pointed out to me.

Well, we'll get to that later. But it has a rising sun on it in different colours, but similar. Stand-up comic James McCann had to print new posters at his own expense. Not at my manager's expense, but it'll be at my expense at some point in the future. To change the red sun design to a yellow one with a smiley face after the fringe refused to publish the red sun design to a yellow one with a smiley face after the fringe refused to publish the original graphic. Quote, What was Orwellian and pernicious is that they didn't enter into a dialogue

or say what they were opposed to, McCann said. I have no recollection of saying that, but it reads like the sort of pompous arrogance that would spew out of me in regular conversation with no troubles whatsoever however it says fringe director heather kroll said it would now permit the image quote after speaking today with comedian james forbes mccann about the can no one get all four of the names correct after speaking with comedian james forbes mccann about the content of his show and the

purpose of his new poster image, the Fringe is happy to change the image on his show's web listing. Thank you, Heather. You're a very reasonable person. The Rising Sun, and this is back to the article, the Rising Sun flag was first used by feudal warlords from 1603 to 1868, then was adopted as the war flag of the Imperial Japanese Army and is now flown by the Japan Maritime Self-Defense Force. It is controversial in Korea and China, where it is still associated with Japanese militarism and imperialism. McCann's manager was originally told, quote, at Adelaide Fringe, we reserve the right

not to publish images that are liable to incite racial, ethnic or homophobic hatred. Which is pretty broad. Liable. He's doing a lot of lifting there. Incite. I mean, it's just, it's basically, that's just saying we can get rid of anything we don't want from left-wing political grounds, isn't it?

Racial, ethnic, homophobic hatred. What about class-based hatred? What about people who hate the rich? Hmm? No concerns there. Or people who hate the poor, actually. There's a hole in that. Maybe next year my poster will have me kicking the life out

of a pauper um it won't be i'm oh well let's let's cross that bridge when we come to it hey maybe not every creative choice has to be determined by what is a line ball case that might cause somebody to overreact so you can have a story about it in the advertiser. Quote. Ah, no, not a quote. Here we go. President, this is the story. President of the Japan-Australia Friendship Association in Adelaide, Mike Dunphy, said the rising sun flag could be considered offensive. Patrick, they're doing some excellent journalism, contacting the president of the Japan-Australia Friendship Association in Adelaide, who said, quote, it represents a period of history that wasn't very positive for many people, Japanese and their neighbours, Mr Dunphy said.

Yeah. No kidding. Australia-Japan Association of SA president, I guess he's a man, Patrick here has called multiple Japanese-South Australian friendship associations. Australia-Japan Association of SA President Kyoko Katayama, sorry, I was struggling with a burp as I was trying to pronounce that name, Kyoko Katayama said the rising sun flag could be particularly offensive for older people who remembered World War II. Quote, because of my age,

as soon as I see the flag, I think of the war, Mrs. Katayama said. There are lots of, quote, there are lots of, from Katayama, there are lots of Korean people here and Chinese people here, so I don't feel comfortable if they, brackets, artists, use it. Presumably, brackets, flag. So there's, look, I am offended on behalf of Japanese people, as outlined in my press release. But obviously the Japanese here are not offended on their own account. And really this is why Mishima, the great author, homosexual model and coup attempter,

had to kill himself to, with his blood, inspire the Japanese people to take back militarism. So on their behalf, I am offended for the Japanese people. But I will not be committing suicide. Here we go. This year's fringe poster and program cover features an almost identical sun design, except in yellow with red rays in its top left corner. It's true. Look it up. That doesn't say that, but I'm saying that.

It has been changed to blue and yellow for the school's guide. Sure. It's true. Look it up. That doesn't say that, but I'm saying that. It has been changed to blue and yellow for the school's guide. Sure. Here we go. Quote, I couldn't help but notice, end quote. McCann said, man, I just, am I as pompous as it seems that I am in this article? Potentials moi? The comedian's show, or here's the plug, the comedian's show, the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan Extravagan, is at the Royalty Theatre on March 10. That's March 10, now I remember. Quote, there's a discussion of the show, which is a, there's a part of the show which is a discussion of Japanese culture,

but it also looks cool, McCann said, of his reason for using the rising sun design. Made myself laugh. And end paragraph is a little sour one in 2020 the fringe dropped the bondage show from its program after upholding allegations its organizer wore sorry i'm reading this in the car in bad light and probably sounds like i can't read in 2020 the fringe dropped the bondage show from its program after upholding allegations its organizer wore racist costumes, including a Ku Klux Klan-style hood. Now, I don't know what that has to do with my story or why it's at the end there. I don't know if I'm being equated with a bondage show organizer.

I'm just a man who wants to restore honor and dignity to the proud nation and people of Japan. But Patrick, you've done a wonderful job. I also want to thank Dean Martin, the wonderful the photographer Dean Martin for choosing. I tried so hard to look deadpan. I looked deadpan, Dean, in about 50 different photographs that you took. And what was chosen was the one where I look like I'm being electrocuted in the anus. Dean, how you do me dirty like that on the picture, Dean? Dean! Anyway, a happy resolution for all. I think you can agree, a happy resolution for all. I'm getting my poster back. The show got some publicity. The Adelaide Fringe get to not make a terrible mistake.

The people of Japan get to pretend like they're not interested in military exercises through having those sort of pacifist-style anti-flag comments in the newspaper. The newspaper gets a cool story. Dean Martin gets to humiliate me with this insane picture. Dean, I know I made that face, but the wind was extreme and it was hard to hold the posters in the wind. I look like a nut, Dean. But Dean has taken a very good photo nevertheless,

and if it's what the story needed, I thank you, Dean. Oh! So that draws that saga to a close. Obviously, the story isn't really about anything I wrote about in my press release. Pat from the Advertiser has... I talked to him on the phone and I said, Pat, what I'm really angry about is the treatment, the racist treatment of the nation of Japan.

And he said, I thought you were being tongue-in-cheek about that. And I said, well, what does it mean to be tongue- cheek? But I did sort of mean it. I did. No, I did. I do mean it. I do mean it. The nation of Japan deserves an apology. And I will say when I spoke to Heather Kroll and she said, we're letting the poster back in. I told her, I said, thank you. I hope I said, thank you. I hope I said thank you. I hope I was polite. I said, thank you, Ms. Crowell. But what I would like, and I did say this, I said, what I would like is for the Adelaide Fringe to issue a public apology to the nation of Japan, to which Heather Crowell, the head of the Fringe, said, and I hope I'm not talking out of school.

She said, well, I'll take that to my team. out of school, she said, well, I'll take that to my team. And I said, I understand that a decision of that magnitude could only be made in discussion with one's team. Anyway, just having a good time there, but a good time and a serious time. It's only funny because it's true. And I hope Heather Kroll does have a discussion with her team About making a public apology to the nation of Japan And I hope that the team comes to a very honourable decision It's been a wonderful week It's not that often you get in the newspaper

And you get a large bureaucratic arts institution to admit that it was wrong Again, I haven't received an apology, but by their acts, they've obviously, that's an admission that an error occurred. I want to thank everybody who's been so supportive. I want to thank everybody who's bought tickets. I want to thank people at the advertiser. I want to thank Heather Crowell. Sorry, it's very late.

It's 12.30 at night When I'm tired I have V for T-H Inversion Like some sort of working class Englishman saying Oi Eva And it bristles upon me To speak in that way

Gee, they make me seem a bit Pompous in the advertiser article. I could not help but notice. McCann said, what's the other one? It was all willian that they did not enter into a dialogue. That really must be how I speak. Sometimes we don't notice our patterns until they're all laid out in front of us. I want to thank you, dear listener, for coming with me on this wonderful journey.

I want to thank Sam McDonnell, my lawyer. This microphone, I use a portable... Boy, I had a couple of drinkies today and I was in the sun. I was too much in the sun. It was my son's... I know that means something different. It was my son's second birthday today. And I got to be in charge of Pass the Parcel. And I understood. I realized for the first time that Pass the Parcel is rigged.

I could have guessed that years ago. But when you're playing Pass the Parcel as a kid, it just feels like if you hold on to the parcel, you hand it off quickly, you might change it. It's rigged, man. Which also means every time I played past the parcel and didn't win, or like someone was screwing with me. But how was I so dumb not to realize that past the parcel was rigged? Here's another thing. Kids are so excited about past the parcel. You don't have to play the wiggles. You can play whatever music you want. You can play insane music. I played that Japanese song that goes

Do you know the one? And it goes Best bit I don't know the words And I don't want to do Japanese Babble Because that might also be offensive To the proud and noble people of Japan

But hey, maybe I could put that song on the show There's a thought Well, I love you. I need you. I miss you. I want you. Canamaran Ho. This episode is brought to you by Google Pixel.

I'm Jessie Crookshank. I host the number one comedy podcast called Phone a Friend. I also have three kids. I need help making every day easier. So I switched to Google Pixel. It's a phone powered by Gemini, your personal AI assistant. Gemini can help you summarize your unread emails, suggest what to make with the food in your fridge,

and it helped me achieve a family photo where everyone is smiling at the camera. I didn't think it was possible, but it is with Google Pixel 9. Learn more at store.google.com. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessi Kirkshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture. But when I have questions, I get to phone a friend. I phone my old friend, Dan Levy. You will not die hosting the Hills after show. I get thirsty for the hot wiggle.

I didn't even know what thirsty meant until there was all these headlines. And I get schooled by a tween. Facebook is like a no. That's what my grandma's on. Thank God Phone a Friend with Jessie Crookshank is not available on Facebook. It's out now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps

creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com.