The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - boyohboywowee ft. Eve Ellenbogen

Episode Date: May 17, 2024

Here is Eve's instagram: https://www.instagram.com/eveelbow/Join the sailing club to contribute financially to James Donald Forbes McCann's journey to boat ownership: https://www.patreon.com/jdfmccannBuy the several books written by James Donald Forbes McCann: https://www.jdfmccann.com/books Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Acast.com Life is sweet. Life is beautiful and so sweet. Sometimes we forget. Sometimes we don't appreciate just how sweet and beautiful life is. Well, I'm here to tell you. It's a beautiful thing. It's a beautiful thing.

It's a beautiful thing. Hey, it's great to be here. I'm back from the big tour opening for Shane Gillis. Ooh, life on the road is tough. My first night I was back in my bed. I thought I was in a hotel room and I woke up all... My son walked into the room. I was like, how are...

And I was like, ah! This is a man! But I'm now readjusted. And the house is... We're setting up the house beautifully. My wife has done a tremendous job in the house. It's so well set up that I'm now in our bedroom. I'm not in the car.

I'm in the bedroom. It's nice to have a room. It's nice to have a room. It's nice to have a room to quietly sit and do a podcast about your aspirations for boat ownership. I haven't had a room I was able to do this podcast in in some time. And in fact, there's another room that's going to be the set specialty room for doing the podcast. It's a garage. Kick inside to the garage, man. Now, as previously alluded to on the podcast, I'm enlisting help. So video editing will be done so that there can be a visual component and I can just palm that off and say, here's the video, here's the audio,

put something together so the people on YouTube and Instagram can enjoy it. Wonderful. And a producer. Now, I have a difficult history with producers. I've been removed from several radio shows before because of disagreements. I could never get along with the producers. Nice people. Just different views about where the show should go, you know? I thought it should go in one direction. They thought I should be sacked and not hired again. But I've got a producer.

Her name's Eve. She's my friend Eve. She's been on the podcast before. She's also living in Austin. Eve will have a predominantly off-microphone role. She'll be sitting in a corner and preparing things so that I can do the podcast. And I'm telling her what to prepare. She's getting a set ready at the moment and a captain's costume so we can convert the garage into a deep sea theme.

And then I'm having her print out. I mean, we have an interview today. She gets to be on the microphone today. But this is the James Donald Force McCann catamaran plan, and I don't really like having other people on the show. It's me. It's a microphone. That's it. It's some interviews where I can get around to editing them. I feel very bad about

not having edited the kieran j callanan episode yet go listen to that kieran j callanan album it's a delight as are the other kieran j callanan albums gee i've got to get around to it's become a mental block in my mind anyway the important thing is eve uh is gonna help me produce the podcast and i've given her strict instructions about how to produce it. I've gone through the last, oh, I think we're up to almost 130 episodes now. I've picked out the best segments that people seem to like the most.

What have we got in there? We've got ocean news. We've got the advice column. We've got affirmation news. And we've got other stuff as well. We've got stuff that people seem to like on the podcast. Boil that down. Churn that out.

Get that done. I think we could probably do... Oh, I'm trying to have three days where we can do eight-ish episodes. And then I don't have to think about anything else for a while. You know what? It's done. Bang. Bang.

That man sang Bangvia. It was Brian Taylor. Oh, I'm getting... Now that the Crow It was Brian Taylor Oh I'm getting Now that the Crowboys are watchable I'm watching the Crowboys I'm staying up all hours to watch the Crowboys They've got a game tonight I think it's like 10.30 Austin time

We're playing Collingwood After G Difficult game But Collingwood's got some big injuries I'm slowly introducing the Americans To the AFL when I was in Denver On the last night there. Shane and Nate and some people who were at the show

and some bar staff, we got together, and we watched a thrilling draw against the Brisbane Lions. Again, we probably should have won, but still a thrilling draw. And, gee, I'm enjoying just going back and listening to some Brian Taylor commentary. It can't be. It can't be. It can't be. It is.

It can't be. Oh, what a watch. The Opeloi went up with the full force of his body and now rough head. That was out of bounds. That was out of bounds. That was out of bounds. That was out of bounds. And Shields goals.

Boy, oh boy. Big non-decision there, I reckon, Dars. But McDonald kept the booty. It was like a giant clam closing in on Landon. Bang! It just shot, and there was no getting out of that. I mean, he's the best commentator. He's a divisive commentator.

And I've got one friend, oh, I've got one friend, Craig Quartermain, whose judgment is usually pretty sound. But on the topic of Brian Taylor, Craig, I don't know what planet you're on. Brian Taylor is the man. Orazio Fantasia. Tip and Woody. Little quick handball over the top. Lewinberger.

Orazio Fantasia. Orazio Fantasia. Orazio Fantasia. I get the feeling you like Arazio Fantasia as a name It was a good point It was It was a beautiful point And it had a bit of

Electricity about it Bruce He makes me so happy If you're looking for an introduction To Australian Rules Football If you're one of our many American listeners brian taylor best of that's what you want watch the roman brian watch the car this i could just have this podcast could be hours and hours of brian taylor on the rub enjoy go and enjoy or don't maybe do it after the podcast. Or simultaneous with the podcast. Anyway, hey.

Coming up is the interview with new producer Eve Ellenbogen. If you enjoy the interview, there's more of it. We spoke for like half an hour and then that one went on the Patreon. And then we did this chat. So here's Eve. God bless you, Catamaran. Oh. Actually, I will say, at the end of this interview, well, we were sitting in my car getting coffee

and I brought the microphone because that was the only time I had to do it because the life is still very chaotic and we're trying to produce it into something more orderly. But at the end, I said catamaran hoe, which is what I always say. And she thought I was calling her a catamaran hoe. I was like, no, it's like land hoe, but it's a catamaran hoe, which is what I always say. And she thought I was calling her a catamaran hoe. I was like, no, it's like land hoe, but it's a catamaran.

And yeah, so I just thought I should maybe clear that up for anyone else. Okay, this is a very embarrassing moment for me because I just figured out how to record two tracks into GarageBand at the same time. This is the interview with Eve starting now. It's really amazing that you're able to do so much. You're able to write poetry, to open for... You knew how to do this? I know how to Google how to do it.

I don't use GarageBand. What I've been doing is having it onto the one track, and then it recorded one stereo, one mono, and then I'd have to bounce it out of GarageBand, put it in Audacity, split it or combine it, and then put it back in. I think I would have known enough to know that that was not the way. Yeah.

Yeah. I just think, yeah, it's wild. You're able to do so many things but not ask, is this? This is going to make life a lot easier for us from here out. Does that mean that my job is, am I out of a job? No, no, no, not yet. That was my only job. You've got two months of a job.

Now, Eve has been brought on as the producer for the show. Because there's too much going on in my life. I need the podcast to come out every week. Right. He's too successful. It's so hard being successful. Successful is not the word I'd use, but I'm very busy. Yes.

And I'm not taking care of my health. And if I'm to do anything to stay alive longer and have enough energy, I've got to get this podcast figured out. I would say this, though, as a rebuttal to what you're saying. You keep going away. You're opening, can I say what your opening line is often? Oh, yes. You often open with, I'm fat and I'm poor, but the stress is making you not fat.

You look better than I've ever seen you look. I've had to increasingly pick ill-fitting shirts to get away with saying that. I have a jacket where I look too good. Yeah, so I would argue that being this stressed is really helping. Well, I appreciate that. I would like to be fit rather than just wasting away. Yeah, but that's how we know that men and women are different because women are like, I don't care if I'm dying, I've lost weight.

Maybe it's the chemo. Maybe it's anorexia. It's sad, and this is a, as well as being a pro-peace podcast, we just discussed that. Right, sure we did. Just peace in the most vague and general sense, not tied to any particular conflict. Right. We love peace. Inner life, peace?

Out of life, inner life, your life, peace. It's also, I think, not body positivity. No. No. I thought for a second it could be body positivity. We just love everybody. Do we? Yes.

On this podcast, well, we want the biggest number of listeners possible. Yes. We love the listeners. So we don't want to alienate anybody. Unless they're not listening. And then they can go talk to a tree. Death to the un-listener. Yeah, talk to a tree is my version of...

Talk to a tree. Because you said that I can't curse. So I would say go mm yourself. Oh, go talk to a tree. Yeah, I just made it up. Well, no, I mean, it comes obviously from the rich biblical tradition of Moses and the burning bush. Yes. Being a Jew, I just come up with these things.

Or when our Lord goes and talks to a fig tree. Do you know this story? I know the fig tree from the bell jar story. I don't know the bell jar. With Sylvia Plath. Never read it. Wrote poems about it. Never read it.

Well, it's referenced in the TV show Master of None, but basically I relate to it too much, which is that this woman is sitting under a fig tree, looking at all the branches, imagining each possibility as her life path. Like she could marry this person. She could go to Europe. It's a whole big metaphor.

And eventually... Why did she pick the one that ended in the oven? Yeah, well, she's a Jew lover. But... Was Ted Hughes Jewish? No, get it? Oh, I see. No, excuse me.

You know, she actually did end up in an oven. I have a joke about it. I didn't know that. About plating the oven. Well, about how so many women used to stick their heads in ovens at the time. Yeah. Because, you know, they were bummed about their lives. And so the way that society dealt with it, and this is true, is that they changed the design of the oven.

So you can no longer gas yourself in the oven. You still have to stay in the kitchen like a woman and cook dinner and don't come out until it's ready. You can't kill yourself. But you can't kill yourself. It's a lot harder. It's like on the bridge where they're like, people are jumping off the Westgate Bridge. Right. Let's put up a fence. Let's just wreck the view with a big fence. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're not like, what's causing malaise? They're just like, let's make this impossible. None of these anti-suicide measures bring the suicide rate down. No, they just make it harder. They just kill themselves elsewhere.

Yeah, it's not like women stop dying. They just stop dying at dinner. Can you imagine how brittle the attempt to commit suicide would be? I can't get off that bridge. I'm not going to go and find bridge number two. Well, in Japan, they did this in the 90s. Oh, the suicide forest. Well, no, that's still a thing.

But so many people were leaving work and just walking in front of the train in Tokyo. I think they're one of the first places that put up the barriers. So it's like, not today. You have to be careful. You know what? Once you get on that train, it's all going to feel a little better. It is true. When the train is coming and you're exhausted and hungover, because I lived in Asia for a long time,

and you have to go drinking with your boss. You have to stay up late. You can't leave before your coworkers. And so it's like if you've been there for how many hours, 20 hours and you're drunk and then you're getting the train and the train's coming and those lights look like salvation. Sure, you might just step out onto the tracks. But once they have the barrier. I think you're going to be a great producer for this podcast. I think this is actually going to work out really well. Do you know what?

I saw it in your eyes. I saw you go, oh, she actually might be good. We're going to be fine. Well, look, the last time I saw your stand-up comedy, it was in a terrible room. Yeah, but that was also during COVID. It was in Brooklyn during COVID. And then you...

You're my friend, and it's still ashroting as comedy at this point for me. What does that mean? What does that mean? you're my friend and it's still a schrodinger's comedy at this point for me what does that mean what does that mean i don't know if it's good i never get to see you in a good room i'm sure i'll get to see you soon yes you'll get to see me here oh we're doing a show together on friday oh that's right we are all right yeah that's true yeah i better not fucking bomb i'm gonna be running the swearing all right we've edited the swearing out we're a pro piece non-swearing podcast. Sorry, sorry. We want everyone to listen.

We want everybody to love. It's about getting the catamaran as quickly as possible. Yeah, sorry. I apologize. I rescind the thing. No, it's all right. I swear all the time. It just makes me do an extra eight seconds.

Now, I've got someone to edit the videos. Basically, here's what I need for the podcast to work. I need an audio recording of me talking for a half hour. Right, we can do this. Okay, I need to... I've taken the best segments from the podcast in the past. And by the way, if this doesn't work for whatever reason, it's fine. We've got eight episodes that I'm using the Patreon money to pay you to bring on

and the other editor and set up the room. Yes. Where we're going to set it up like under the sea and have a little desk and there's going to be a visual element. Yes. I struggle to make the visual element. I'm going to do it. That's my job.

We're taking the best segments from the podcast. We're taking ocean news. Yes. It's coming back. Yeah. Advice column. Which I think should be called pearls of wisdom. Pearls of wisdom.

Yeah. I would like to call it before swine. All right. And we've got facts about the countries I'll be going to on the boat. Yes. On the sailing journey that starts in Los Angeles and comes down Baja, California. Yeah, yeah. Through to Mexico, through Guatemala, so on and so forth.

Yeah. What else have we got? Affirmations. Affirmations. We're going to do affirmations. And then there's also like a little segment That I'm Like my own little

I will allow you to have a small segment Yes But you know You know when Jamie is on Here's an important thing Yeah When Jamie's on Joe Rogan Yeah

He comes in when he's asked Yeah Yeah Eve Going to keep you on a pretty tight leash To bring me in or to not bring me in I'll bring you in when I need you to come in I'll accept that Yeah And then there you to come in. I accept that.

And then there might be a lot of Eve. Back off! If I do that, I want you to know that's a bit. Yeah, can you hit me? And that's out of love.

How many times are you going to bring up wanting to be hit? What's really going on, Eve? No, I just think it's a working... Is this why it's not working out with the fellas?

Because you keep asking them to hit you? No, maybe it's because I won't let them. And they actually want to. I've seen the's a working thing. Is this why it's not working out with the fellas? Because you keep asking them to hit you? No, maybe it's because I won't let them. And they actually want to. I've seen the men you're dating. I don't think they have the T-scores to hit. They do not. They absolutely do not.

Soft boys. No, I am absolutely not dating any hitters. But also, it's all very gray. You want Barry Bones up in here. I want someone who could hit me, but won't. That's what I want. Isn't that... Have you ever written that down?

I haven't, then I forgot all about it. That's a great bit, Eve. That's what all women want. That's the thing about choking. I want to be choked by someone who could kill me, but won't. Yeah, could kill me, but wouldn't do it. Would never hurt a fly. You want the dangerous man who's got it under control.

Who knows himself. Yeah, yeah. But I don't know. It's so hot. It gets me going right now. This is going to be great. So you're going to set up the room.

Yeah. Get the captain's costume for the video component. Yeah. And print out all the facts and things. You'll get the advice column and the facts about the place

and the ocean news. Yeah, and my little spicy whatever the segments are. And a starfish costume. Yeah, and my little spicy whatever the segments are. And a starfish costume. Yeah, well, I was keeping that a secret. Sitting in the corner. I also thought that a lobster costume might be good. Oh, a lobster costume might be good.

You can do something with the moving arms. You can get a series of fun costumes as you sit in the corner. That's the dream is that I show up in the room. Right. I've got about five pages printed out. Right. I just sit down at the desk. I start reading and riffing.

Yeah. Bang. about five pages printed out. Right. I just sit down at the desk. I start reading and riffing. Yeah. Bang. That's a quality 45-minute podcast episode. And can I just say, by the way, you told me 20, but 45 minutes is great. Or 20.

But can I just say that you said that it might not work out, but I think it's going to work out. Great. Yeah. But I've been put eight episodes. Yeah, eight episodes. And I would say if that's not working out, I'll just keep releasing the podcast as is

and the Patreon will keep going anyway. Right. Because I'm up to that Patreon. Patreon. Well, I don't want to hemorrhage people. I don't want to... I mean, I'm trying not to make changes. Really, what this is,

is I think if we can do the eight in a really thoughtful way, speedily. I mean, we could actually bang it out in two to three days. Yeah. That buys me two months to invest in the next project with my time. Right. Because I take a lot of time doing the podcast. Right.

And I've got to finish Wimbledog. Oh, that's your movie. That's the movie script. Right. I've got to finish writing sketches for when I'm back in Australia. Wimbledog. I've got to finish my comedy special and my album of songs by women. Yes.

Do you know about this one? No. It's called Cover Up. I'm going to cover songs by women. I've got to have time to do it, Heath. I've got to have time. I currently have no time. Right.

No, it's true. I've been to your house. It's Bedlam. Yes, it's crazy. The wife's doing such a good job. She's amazing. We're going to run her the coffee back. I would for sure divorce you.

Like, for sure. But I also would never have married. And I mean that in a nice way back. I would for sure divorce you. Like for sure. But I also would never... And I mean that in a nice way. I take it in a nice way. Yeah, yeah. She's a different woman from mine. She's an angel. She is, yeah.

And she never comes on the podcast. She never... Man, the American R's are starting to creep in. What? Never? Never comes on the podcast. Water, like car. It's coming in.

My wife is just so... Where's an R? Hold on. Terrific. Water like car. It's coming in. My wife is just so. Where's an R? Hold on. Terrific. She's terrific. She's wonderful. It's R's at the end of sentences. Sentencers.

What'd you say? Sentencers. Yeah. Get those sentencers out of here. Yeah. The senators in this country are. Senator. Insaner.

Senator. Senator. Yeah. Senator Kennedy. Yeah. yeah we would we literally go senator hance senator aah i'll tell you what i there's some things i miss about australia uh we just went to this australian coffee shop my god i miss the australian coffee shops like cafes whatever but what i don't miss is the accent yours is, I'm from Adelaide. We have a more, no,

you have your own, it's like, you're like, um, like Lesotho, or you're like, yeah, like Lesotho,

pronounced Lesotho apparently in South Africa, where it's like, you're saying I'm an enclave. Yeah. You're like your own thing. You're like from Australia, but that's not really who you are. You know what I've always been scared of?

And this, this won't necessarily win me friends is, uh, sounding like Josh Thomas because I remember Josh Thomas the comedian from Please Like Me he would come on the screen

you know you're at home watching with your family I'm going to put on an affected Australian accent you're at home with your family watching the television and all of a sudden Josh Thomas is there

and he's hello and you go oh I guess he's from England or something no he just talks and the rest of his family is normal do you think he's, hello. And you go, oh, I guess he's from England or something. Yeah, yeah. No, he just talks, and the rest of his family's normal. Do you think he's affected? Like, do you think it's like an affect?

I mean, it's definitely an affectation. Okay, so you don't... Well, what is it, brain trauma? He's got a weird-shaped mouth? People are... But then I said, people go to me, are you from England? You sound... Do I sound like Josh Thomas?

But people ask me in Australia if I was Australian and I spoke like this. Yes. And people they have brain trauma. They're the problem. We're fine. We don't know what to do

with a Jewish person unless they're from South Africa. We don't know what to do with a Jewish person? No we just don't know what category. The American Jew is except you know like

Margot Robbie that's the one accent Australians can do is Brooklyn Jew. Right. That's it. Is that what she does? She's all, when she's doing Harley Quinn. I really don't.

All the time. I don't like Margot Robbie. What? I don't like her. You're off the show. Yeah, you know what I don't. She's a babe. You know what I don't like her?

Because I found out that she's had like a million little bits of plastic surgery. Has she? Yeah, like a little. She was so beautiful early on, though. Yeah, but she's even more beautiful now. Yeah. And that's upsetting to me. Why?

Because it's like you stop being a real person when you have all these little tweaks. Little tweaks. At least it's not big things. Yeah, but it's like her whole face is just. I don't know. I just, you know, she's. I think she's. Well, like Taylor Swift has had incredible work done.

Really? I just don't like. Look at Taylor Swift then and now. It's incredible. I don't like having work done. I think we should... Well, Taylor Swift has had incredible work done. Really? Look at Taylor Swift then and now. It's incredible. I don't like having work done. I think we should all look horrible. I mean, I disagree. There's a great Camille Paglia essay. Oh, Camille Paglia.

This was our first big argument was about Camille Paglia. How I really met you and thought, I shouldn't be friends with him. But I don't know. I feel like I could. When it was like, you know, back in the day when you, I don't know if you ever were like this, when you had principals and you used to base your- I've got more principals than I've ever had.

But when you used to base your friendships around them. Oh, yeah. So we were walking. We left, I think, Crab Lab. Yes. A really great show in Melbourne, Australia. And we were walking on the street, a few of us, like a crowd of us. And you were telling me how much you loved

Camille Paglia. The greatest. Yeah, that she was like a hero to you and I was like I don't think I should You shouldn't be friends with this man. Because my knowledge of her at that point really was when she was on Bill Maher in the 90s

or early 2000s telling Bill Maher, who by the, I think. So hot. Or early 2000s, telling Bill Maher, who, by the way, interrupted her and called her, I think, insufferable. Yes. But at this one point, they agreed on one thing, which was that if you go home... That's come out.

That's out of the podcast. I didn't know we'd have to take that out of the podcast, but that's the line. We should talk about that. I won't say what I said. No, no, we'll just move on. Just keep going on this is scary because as the producer your job is to say whoa now well i don't know the flavor of the podcast

well you're gonna have to go back and listen to some of the podcast okay i love camille here's one thing i'd like is to get camille palier on the podcast okay she's so great listen i think that she would be a great guest on your podcast. Yeah. I don't think I want to get a coffee after. Eve, it would be the most exciting coffee of all time. It would be a bad date. It would be hanging out with someone.

You think she'd be keen on you? Is that what you're saying? She would. I think she's keen on everybody. I've never seen someone with such a heightened sexual. Yes. I think the more you dislike her, the more keen she is on you. Is that what you're saying? I think she's keen on everybody. I've never seen someone with such a heightened sexual... Yes. I think the more you dislike her, the more keen she is on you. I think that the more you're like, Camille, you are really annoying.

She's like... She's just so excited that you can't stand her. That's so vibrant and exciting. Anyway, listen. James Donald Forbes began Catamaran Plan. It's about the catamaran. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Catamaran! Oh yeah, I have been working on stingers. What are stingers?

JDFM. Yeah, great. Like radio in between certain things. I almost corrected you. I was going to go, that's not your initial. I'm like, oh, those are your initials. It's like a radio station. So at some point I'd like to get Amos.

The Amos Gill episode went, I think it's going fine. Okay. But I'd like to set him up with a commercial radio show he can't um he can't do anything online the poor boy he's such a good comedian why because he's a big big retard right i love that that's fine for the podcast retard yeah yeah but then some of the things i've said you're like eve pull it yeah because you said that you how did it how did it once again? It's wrong when you do it.

It's wrong when I do it. Okay. But we can talk smack about Amos. I mean, I haven't listened... Oh, yeah, of course. Okay. But I mean, I love him. Yeah. And he knows that he's very bad at social media stuff.

But he's... He's my favorite Australian comedian. I'm sorry, Eve. He's my favorite Australian comedian. I'm not Australian, so I don't take it. Although, I'm not going to be your favorite American comedian. No, I'm my favorite American comedian. I could be your favorite Australian comedian. I'm not Australian, so I don't take it. Although I'm not going to be your favorite American comedian. No, I'm my favorite American comedian. I could be your favorite Jewish comedian.

Steve Harvey Jewish? No. Oh. I just don't see. A lot of hard edits coming. I notice the edits increase as the episodes go on. Well, yeah. It's only because we're getting the feel for it.

Next month. Yeah. At some point in the next month or next month, we're going to have this room set up. Yes. We're going to record eight episodes. Blitz, back to back to back to back. Great. I'm just going to show up for those days and make hot content. Yes.

You're going to produce it. Yeah. We're going to send it out. It's going to get edited. It's going to get uploaded. I'm not even going to have to think about it. Right. If they go well, great.

We can keep doing it like that. If they go badly and people go, stop this immediately, we can stop that immediately. Great. Love it. That's my current plan for the podcast. Yes. All right. I'm on board, Captain.

Now, you need to set that. You need a captain's suit. For you. For me. You need an outfit for yourself. Yes. You need to want it to look like it's under the sea. I bought a nice rug and we've got a blue wall in there in the garage that will at some

point be a bedroom for somebody, but it's not the moment. I bought a nice rug and we've got a blue wall in there in the garage that will at some point be a bedroom for somebody, but it's not the moment. What else do we need? Cut out little fish. Yes. Cut out fish. The kids can be involved in that in some way. I think so.

Yeah. Spotlight. Spotlight. We're going to make it out of like a basically super glue. We're going to get a lamp and we're going to super glue some cardboard around it. Right. And we're going to start a fire. Yeah.

Well, we'll get something flame retardant. Do you mind me saying that word? I don't. Listen, I'm not making the rules here. You're the captain, all right? Flaming retardant is Dan's syndrome. Hey, this is going to be a good, clean, loving, open, good podcast. Yes.

Now that I know how to do this, it's so much easier to have a guest on. Yeah. I know. Oh, my. Yeah, and all the hours. Maybe that's why. So much time. But you know what?

If you didn't have that experience, maybe you wouldn't have hired me as a producer because you would have been like, this is so easy. I don't need you anymore. Yeah, yeah, exactly. But you've already agreed to a price. I have. And I want the listeners to know, it's not a lot of money. Eve's very poor.

And I've gotten this deal, really an outrageously small amount of money. I've already spent so much time with you, but it's all right. It's all right. It's also hanging with my pal, JDFM. JDFM. Yeah, we're going to make a lot of the stingers. It's going to be great. All right.

Let's go home. Let's give everyone their coffee. Yep. I got the kids a cookie. Do you want to make a lot of the stingers. Yeah. It's going to be great. All right. Let's go home. Let's give everyone their coffee. Yeah. I got the kids a cookie. Do you want to hear a poem? Yeah. All right. I'll read you my poem.

Ah, man. These poems suck. All right. All right. All right. Okay. Ready. This is one I started writing last night.

It's not really a poem. It's more a series of... If you go to LeBron James' Wikipedia page, in the first paragraph it states he's compared all the time to Michael Jordan in debates over the greatest basketballer. But if you go to Michael Jordan's Wikipedia page, it doesn't even mention that LeBron James exists until you're 7,000 or 8,000 words deep in the thing.

And even then, it's not even in the context of a rivalry. It's a random statistic referencing heaps of other basketball players. And men like Babe Ruth and Wayne Gretzky who didn't even play basketball professionally. Now you tell me what that means for LeBron. You tell me what that means for debating, etc. I am

Michael Jordan. I call that a poem. I call that a manifesto. I call that, if you were a shooter and you left that behind, it would make sense. Can I read you my, this is another poem. Yeah. This won't make the book. Okay.

The tests are coming back fine, which is absolutely what we want to see. She's a healthy, beautiful baby. Yes, you are. Look at you. Now make sure you get that skin-to-skin contact. It's really important important for bonding and here is the number for the breastfeeding hotline you're doing really well but if you want you can call them and that's about it oh you might start to notice that you don't really care about

gaza anymore we've been seeing that a lot with the first time mums it's totally normal it's just part of life and that's a poem about how childless women are really interested in Gaza. I mean, yeah, that makes sense. I don't have any kids. Did you get that that was a poem about childless women in Gaza? Yeah, if I'd had a beat, yeah, I would have gotten that. A beat? A beat to think about it.

You just want to be beaten. You've got a real problem. If someone had beaten me, I really would have understood that poem more. I think that's, everything you do is art. Everything, well. Yes! That's what the producer has to be saying. Look at him, huddled in the corner, huffing cocaine up his nose.

This too is a poem. It's been wonderful having you on the podcast, Eve. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thanks for hiring me. God bless you, God keep you. Goodbye. Catamaran Ho. Thus concludes our interview with Catamaran Ho, Eve Ellen Bogan. We're going to have

a smoother road to the boat than ever before. We're going to be producing some of the best, most beautiful content you've ever seen for boat ownership. Life is very sweet. Life is very beautiful. Life is very sweet. We should remember that. When we are overcome with difficulties and anxieties let us remember how sweet life is very sweet life is very beautiful life is very sweet and we should remember that and when we are overcome

with difficulties and anxieties let us remember how sweet life is so long as the Crowboys win tonight if the Crowboys lose tonight ooh

I'll be in a bad mood I'll be grim I'll be a sour puss I'll be pointing a lot of fingers and doing a lot of shouting but if they win life is sweet life is beautiful

life is good boy oh boy wowee can you believe it it's all happening and doing a lot of shouting, but if they win, life is sweet, life is beautiful, life is good. Boy, oh boy. Wowee. Can you believe it? It's all happening. Anyway, God bless you. God keep you. I love you. Affirmations. Keep it real, son. I didn't really know what keeping it real meant when I was in Australia. I would hear people say, keep it real. And I just, well, how do you not keep it real? Go to a fantasy, develop dementia develop dementia that seems a challenge but now I understand what it is to keep it real it's to you know sort of indescribable now I think it's like just don't don't have the malarkey the nonsense keep it real I'm keeping it real. I'm keeping it real. I apologize.

I just, I found this song on my downloads that I had apparently made. I have no memory of making this song, and I enjoyed it, and I wanted to share it. Oh, let's play some more Brian Taylor commentary. Oh, no. Oh, no. He played deliberate. That is unbelievable. That outlier cannot play that kick. Oh, no.

That bounced it right. Angles that kick there. That is an all-time low. Boy, oh boy, wowee. Yes, it will. Skip's over Simpson. It can't be. It can't be.

It can't be. It is. It can't be. It is't be. It can't be. Some easy goals out the back tonight. Stevie J was run down. Oh, he was wrestling around. Sammy J only needed a little inkling. He got in.

On the left around the corner. Oh, oh, oh. Has taken the mark. 35 metres out. Do not even think about passing the ball. No, half. You've got to go back and kick this one. You're 25 metres out, man. Has taken the mark 35 meters out. Do not even think about passing the ball. Nahas. You've got to go back and kick this one. You're 25 meters out, man.

Well, it worries me that you're thinking about it. You're going to love this. What are you doing, man? Why? Why? Why? Nahas. Are you scouring the web for the best Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals?

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