The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - can you feel it?

Episode Date: March 12, 2026

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Can you feel it? King back to the old star. You're on the James Donald Foursman, Cadamaran Plan podcast, an audio-only podcast today. The video component was Sam Clark's busy this week. Sam Clark is putting together a little comedy special and that'll come out soon. And hopefully that'll lead more people to buy tickets to my upcoming comedy shows.

I've got two, I think, sold out. I think we sold out two shows in Perth. And I'm with another show in Perth on sale. and there will be a link somewhere for that. I'll come to Perth on the 20th. And Sam Giers, Sam Clark putting together, I did some shows in Adelaide, and he's editing them up. And, well, there's other things that are getting in the way.

I don't like to describe it as getting in the way of bringing in the podcast because they're more important. Oh, what could be more important than the podcast? Do I tell you what? We had a child. Can you feel it? We had a child. And so anybody who's waiting on an email from me,

I apologize. The reason your email hasn't come through yet is because we've had a child. And we're looking after the child. He's a sweet baby boy. And that's all I have to say about it, keeping as I do my family life very private. But I will say this. The baby's doing well. Thank you for your prayers.

My wife's doing well. Thank you for your prayers. And I don't know if it's because we had a child. And that's a scary time. I don't know if it's... Well, look, I suspect this because I watched a documentary on the ABC about starving Afghani children. There's itty-bitty Afghani children starving,

and I watched a program on that. And I think because of that the next day, I started fasting. And we're on about day three of fasting now. And I don't know if I've said, I mean, I would hope that I'm fasting for the Lenton reasons. There's something to offer up to God. Three days of fasting, three days of the rosary every day.

Is it to give... A little sense of control. Maybe. Very teenage girl of me. It's not that I'm not eating at all. I'm just eating very seldom. And it is sort of nice to feel like you can, you know, everything's out of... It's crazy.

It's just crazy times. Very happy to have it. It's not as bad as it has been in the past. It feels manageable. But it's more. It's four. There's four of them. There's four.

I am proud to announce that the transition from three to four thus far, early days, but so far it's the easiest transition of all. People told me it would be. Someone said, you know, three children is hell, four children is cattle. And there's, I don't think three children is hell, but it's really tough. But I think there comes a point. They've taken everything you have to give. You know, first child comes along.

They take, you know, 33% of everything you've got. Second child comes up. They take another 33%. percent of everything you're time for yourself, time of your spouse, time of reading. Third child's got, they take, they take 34%. You're at 100%, you know. And the fourth child comes on, there's nothing left to take away from me. Really, what, this child is just taking away from what I'm giving to the other kids.

You know, they're all getting a smaller portion now, but I don't have anything left for me. So, they might get upset. They're actually all doing really well. They're all very happy to have a new baby brother. are the other children. And we got a nice stroller perambulator.

And I get to walk the baby. It's nice, walking a baby in a big pram. It's a good feeling makes you feel like you're doing, getting something done, you know? Walking a baby to sleep. There are only so many opportunities

as the father to feel like you're making a contribution. There's just not much I can do with the baby. I can hold the baby. I can change the baby. That's it. I can't. entertain the baby. I can't teach the baby anything. I can't feed the baby, but I can put that

baby in a machine and walk that machine around the neighborhood while I don't eat. Yes, I don't know. Again, I don't really understand why I'm radically limiting. I mean, look, it's not that I'm so skinny that you go through a little fasting. I was never really a fasting person. I don't fast very often. I'm more of a slow guy, but I just, you know, I know that's a part of the faith. It's meant to fast, especially in this Lenton season. But, you know, I don't like it because it's unpleasant. But I have been doing it, and it has been actually quite nice. And I don't think I'm doing it to lose weight.

I don't think I'm doing it to look good. But I think I'm doing it to offer it up to God. But then, in my delirium, I think, God wants you to be beautiful. God wants you to be skinny. You ever look up at a stained glass window and see a chunkster? Not very often. God wants skinny disciples. I've only ever once seen a fat depiction of our Lord.

It was at the Stations of the Cross at the Brisbane Cathedral. Check it out if you get up there. These stations at the cross at the Brisbane Cathedral. I mean, you're just a bad thing. Well, he's going to fall off that cross. It's not strong enough. And if you say, oh, it's James, that's very, that's not, that's inappropriate. Yeah.

Tell that to the guy who worked on the Brisbane Cathedral. Other complaints I have from the Brisbane Cathedral. The main crucifix behind the altar, kind of provocative is another problem I had with it. They didn't have pews. They had chairs with back. on them set up straight. And what's nice about pews, something I think natural happens with lines of visibility is you got someone right in front of you. You're on a pew, they're on a pew, someone's right in front of you, just move a little to the left or the right, you know,

and you can stagger just a little bit, just a couple inches, give you a whole line of sight, and everybody's doing that because then, you know, that, and it works beautifully. But if it's seats in set locations, nobody can, because the seats have a little ridge up the side, it's too linear you've got to have a little more room for freedom that's the joy

of the pew one of the many joys of the pew the joy of the pew new book up working on the new joy of the pew yeah look

it's mostly it's mostly fasting and having a baby and trying to get things ready doing this big America tour uh

should I plug tickets at some point as well ads have started we've approved all these advertisers. We've said to them, yes, we don't have a problem with you doing ads. They go, would you have a problem if we gave you money for ads? This is part of the system. And we say, no, I don't have a problem with that. And they go, oh, good to know. And then I just haven't heard back.

But I'm looking for the first one that got in contact was Blue Chew, which is the, it's for having a more powerful erection. And I could do ads for that. I mean, it would be. It would be. difficult for me to say, I mean, I've never used that. And I, frankly, I'd like some sort of drug that did the opposite if I was looking at my life. And I'd say, get to unshackle me from this madman. Anyway, we'll figure out, I don't think there's anything morally wrong with letting people know about that. I mean, I'm not going to give them any more of free advertising, because no one's come through with it. But at some point, there'll be ads. Oh, I'll tell you my shows.

That's what people use their podcasts. Before we jump into the juicy stuff. It's a big tour. It's a ridiculous tour. I count it up. I think it's something like 40 shows all up in a month, which is Elvis Presley going mad type stuff. So, April 24th to the 26th in Austin.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. seven one two good lord seven is it six six six shows in austin and all but one are sold out one two three four five are sold out and one is not sold out and i will also say we i did have to cancel a san antonio show i'm very sorry the san antonians that was going to be on the next it was on the 27th but it had to be canceled so please get on up to austin if you're a san antonian and you have time and the ability to brave the I-35. Get on up. We're next.

I'm going to Albuquerque after that. I'm going to Phoenix and then I have a weekend in San Diego. And then I'm going to be at the Netflix is a joke festival in Hollywood, California. And then I think Seattle's almost sold out. Portland is sold out. Another Portland show got added. Chicago's selling out. what's this one?

Detroit sold out and they cannot add another one. One of the Toronto gigs sold out but the other one is only almost sold out. After that, I've got a New York gig that's sold out and they've added another one. Then Boston, Pittsburgh, Orlando, Naples in Florida,

a Tampa one that sold out, but we've added one in after that, also in Tampa. And then Denver. and then San Francisco. So they're selling very well, and I'm grateful to you for that. If you are going, oh, James, some people are front to me, they go, James, you're not coming to Ohio. Well, in the, yes, I apologize.

In the classic Midwest tradition, though, of driving four hours to go and see something, might I recommend that you come and see me in Pittsburgh? because that's a huge room and it's a lot of shows. And I know that some of the sweet, wonderful people from Stubanville might come up and see the show in Pittsburgh. But there's just so many tickets to sell in Pittsburgh. And if you want it to go, I mean, I think I'll be staying in Stubinville for that weekend. I mean, come and say hi.

If you're a normal, if you're a normal cool guy, come and say hi, I'll be in Stuponville, Ohio, not doing shows, but are just, well, maybe we'll do a little poetry thing, I don't know. Maybe. Anyway, it's, I'm looking forward to it. I've got a couple more shows coming up in Australia. I did one in. Sydney, we've got the Perth, anyway, places, spaces, faces, faces.

And so on. so forth forever and ever. It's a good time. There's a war. Yes, but I never think about the war. Because it's so very far away. It's one of the really nice things about being in Australia is that when a war breaks out, you can go, oh, that's quite far away. It's always far away from where I am.

A war hasn't been close to Adelaide since, I mean, you could call it a war when Whitey got here and took it. But if you're not calling that a war, then there's never been a lot. large-scale industrial warning here. And it's so far away. I mean, it's close to those people. And I've got Persian friends. And they seem pleased. By and large,

I won't speak for them. They seem, you know, they go, Hazar. But also, oh, spooky. That's about all the geopolitical. I don't have much more. There's other people you can go to for your geopolitical.

That's about it for me. Geopop. I'm not much of a guy for geopolitical. You know what I'm about local politics? Not enough people interested in the local politics. People got very big, broad ideas about how to cover up the Middle East, New World Order type business. I'm interested in why is this Labor government taking out some of the buildings from a park

that I'm very fond of? There's a park I'm fond of. And it looks like that the side that's definitely going to win, I mean, all things, short of it would short of anything the guy who's currently the premier

is so convincing maybe is the adjective he's going to win again Jimmy what's he done well he brought a golf tournament here and there's slightly more football being played

here than there was before and he built a new he had a new swimming pool built and you go really is that it you go Kind of.

I mean, there was other stuff going on, you know, sex offenders registered. It's just like populist stuff. And he looks good with his shirt off. His name's Peter Malinouskas. I'm not against him. I'm not against anybody. I'd love to have him on the show. But I would hope a little more grandeur.

But anyway, they want to knock down some trees. They can build a nicer golf course so that the Saudis will delight. more so in golf he brought a motorcycle race here it's all events that's the secret i think to being a state leader is not because you can balance that people go oh you've got to balance the budget of the state why the country will bail you out the country if you use your money as a state if you go way into debt to get like stuff so that people move to your state and you build up really fast and then you're a big powerful state hey guess what at a federal level they'll bail you out I know there's that Gerald Ford you know what he said go to hell he said something about

New York but mostly most of the time states in Australia if you use it to grow they'll bail you out don't worry about so it's like state premier you've got governors in the United States but here State Prove is just like, you know, you're just kind of a guy throwing a party. You don't control income taxes in Australia. The amount of money is kind of set. Here's the other thing. The amount of money you get in Australia as a state is kind of set by how badly you're doing. Like if you're doing better, they take money away from you.

And if you're doing worse, they give you more money. So why get better? Just like throw a party, be popular. That seems to be the answer. Oh, with one exception. If you're in Queensland, then, You can just torpedo free speech.

That's what I mean, I don't know if you're seeing what's happening in Queensland at the moment. They banned the saying And if you're in Queensland and you're listening to this podcast, maybe just turn the volume down for a little bit because we don't want what I'm about to say to be, you don't want people to hear it.

But when people say from the river to the sea, if you say that, the government can arrest you, the state government can arrest you and can send you to jail. for two years if convicted. So that's, I mean, I'm not a person who frequently says the sentence from the river to the sea, unless it is followed by the supplementary sentence,

Israel shall be free, Israel forever, pure, beautiful one state Israel. I'm not really geopolitics. I'm not a big geopolitics guy, but I would say. There's footage out of an 18-year-old girl from the river to the sea. see on her shirt being marched into a paddy wagon by the cops they're taking her away and she's going to be charged and they're really holding her arm my goodness the cops are really holding her arm and um you know what is i would say going to be difficult for the state government there is uh you know she's only 18 and she looks pretty normal she looks like a nice normal

person who's wearing a shirt, like a political shirt, not an especially nuanced political shirt, and then she's being arrested and looks like she's going to get charged. I mean, it's just so not helpful. You're not, it's not, that is not helping. I would just, do you remember when Kanye was coming out and saying, um, Jewish people could take away all my bank accounts if I keep talking about Jewish people? And then Kanye lost access to his bank account. And maybe people will say, oh, that isn't actually how it happened.

This is more specific, more nuanced. Okay. But it's not a good look. And this is, it's not a good, it's not a good look. I know what they were hoping was that they would arrest like, you know, like big, militant, scary looking guys. And they're a big, they're a big, scary anti-Israel guys. anti-Jewish guys, big scary ones. And there's footage of them.

And on October 8th, like immediately after October 7th, they're on the steps of the Sydney Opera House. And they're chanting things about Jewish people, and it's spooky footage. And rather than lock those guys up, they just made it so you couldn't go on the steps of the Sydney Opera House. Someone might write to me and say, chance, it's not actually why you could.

Well, let me tell you this. Last time I went to Sydney, After that it happened, I couldn't get to the Sydney Opera House at night because it was closed off because they got all the security there now, presumably so that doesn't happen again. And I've said this before, and I'll say it again, I don't think the, you know, atheist slash wicken, you know, young woman, anti-Israel. Do you know what I'm saying? thrift store women second hand bookstore women this is not

an inspiration for the hotbed of violent terrorism I understand that we had an act of terrorism in this country against Jewish people it wasn't ladies studying for their arts degree who were responsible for that in some way and those guys who did the killing I don't think we're trying to win the hearts in favor of these women. So you're bringing these laws we can't say from the river to the sea anymore in a certain way.

It's a banned phrase. I mean, can we just stop banning phrases? What do we don't have free speech in this country? Excuse me. I mean, it would just be unthinkable for conservatives to bring that in. I mean, again, what do I know about geopolitics? But I can't see conservatives in the United States getting on board with. banning a political phrase.

Well, anyway, they're doing it in Queensland, and isn't it nice? They're not doing it here in South Australia. How am I meant to go to Queensland and not say? I think it's globalised the interfaida you're not allowed to say, and from the river to the sea, you're not supposed to say. It just puts me in a position when I go there because I don't believe in globalising the interfaitor. And I don't believe that from the river to the sea, all the Jews should be, whatever.

you know, whatever you think that means. I don't think that should happen. But having made that a crime, how am I not supposed to do it when I'm there on the stage? Do you understand? How is anyone not supposed to get into a mic and chat? Like, it's an unjust law. Anyway, we'll cross that, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. over the river and into the sea.

I'm reading Simone Vile at the moment. I think that's how you say her name. I borrowed a, I saw it on a shelf, and I started reading it, and within about a paragraph, I was hooked. I've really been enjoying reading Simone Vile. Sometimes there's an introduction by T.S. Eliot at the start,

and he says, I mean, also, for those who haven't quickly Googled Simone Vile, She was a French, I think she was Jewish. And she, I think, she became a Christian, but she never got baptized because she had something about being on the outside. It explained to me hastily. And anyway, then she only ate, I think, like the rations that they were allowed to have in the, is she regime or prisoners of war or something? Anyway, she died young. And there's some sense that it was like a moral stand of not eating.

James, are you fasting? Because of that, I don't know. I'm just hearing and seeing all these things about not eating. And anyway, Simone, wow, she's pretty good. She's an exciting... Sometimes she does lose me. And T.S. Eliot mentions this in the introduction he writes. Apparently T.S. Eliot was a fan.

But she'll just say things that are so broad as to be... Equality is a need of the human soul. And you go, okay, who are you? Why are you saying that? But then other times, it's beautiful, beautiful sentiments. She writes about democracy and, you know, can you tolerate the anti-democracy forces within the democracy? Because if you push them out, then you're like a hypocrite. But if you keep them in, you're a cuck.

It's just a nice, nice little moral of the little. limer there of all right it's it's like an hour later my my newest son of all my sons he's the most new he woke up and it um took ages getting him back down and on the way back i found uh some books that i bought recently i've been spending some time at second-hand bookstores and i got bang the merchant of venice if you're Cut us, do we not bleed. If you kill us, do not die. That's a good one.

I think, yes. I also got Cori Linus, which is one of my favorite. What is it? It is better to perish than to starve? I'm going to get that wrong. I enjoy the mention of it. I don't. Whoa, whoa.

Die than to famish. Couldn't have got that more wrong. Before we proceed any further, hear me speak. And the citizens go, speak, speak. You are all resolved to die Rather than to famish Rather to die than to famish Resolved, resolved

And it goes on from there Good times The Oxford Book of Christian Verse My wife got that one That's probably The most important one there It's got Paradise Lost is in there And others

Semiotics in the Philosophy of Language By Umberto Eirca who I've never read. I got that one about the Rose, but I never read it. Ibsen, the master builder in other places. I was specifically looking for a doll's house, but couldn't find it. I was wondering if I read the doll's house now. Because when I read it when I was a younger man at school,

I was, of course, on her side. But now, thinking back on it, I suspect I'm on the husband's side. And The Magic Lantern by Ingmar Bergman. I got that. I always hired, rented. I got that out of the library very briefly, and I didn't get to read. But here's one I'm really excited about. It's cultures in contrast, miscommunication and misunderstanding between Chinese and North American.

And it's a book, I think I've spoken about it on the podcast before. But would you like to hear, it'll be like this? It'll be like this. I'm just opening up to a random page, but they're all fun like this one. Hopefully this one's fun. Cheryl is a Chinese American teaching in China. On the first day of class, she told the students that she was from Los Angeles, California. However, right after the first class, a few students came up to her and asked her where she was from.

Cheryl was a little surprised. Then maybe the students did not catch her well in class. So she said, Los Angeles, California. Very slowly. The students did not seem to be happy with the answer. Finally, one of them asked, which part of China are you from? Cheryl was startled. I'm not from China.

I'm from the United States. The students in turn were confused. And then it gives you the Chinese perspective And the North American perspective, and the Chinese perspective is Though people are told the United States and Canada are immigrant countries, it is difficult for them to imagine how diverse these cultures are. It's harder for them to think that someone who looks Chinese would call

So they're just saying like, they're asking, where's your ancestors from? Where's your Chinese origin? They expect people to speak Chinese just because they look Chinese. This expectation has a lot to do with the tradition in which people consider the place where their fraternal ancestor Oh, I was born as their hometown. As a result, someone born and still living in Guangzhou would tell people that Shanghai is his or her hometown, simply because his or her ancestor came from that city.

Such a tradition was taking for granted. I mean, I didn't know that. Did you know that? Did you know that? Some of them, I mean, that's not a fun one. The other ones are more fun. There's one where it's like, a guy fell down and Chinese people laughed at them. And the white guy is like, oh, I better help you.

him up. Why are you laughing at him? And the Chinese people like, I don't know, man, he fell down. And it's the perspective. It's like, Chinese people love it when a guy falls down. Unless he's like really brutally hurt. But if he just like falls down normally, it's so funny when a guy is so weak and silly that he falls down. I don't know that I'll ever read any of these books. I was a, oh yeah, because it's Simoneville. I'm reading Simoneville and she's calling out um Andre Gide

who I'd never heard of before I seen that except that someone I had heard in hindsight like when I looked at it

was like oh that's a name that I associate with Oscar Wild because he writes about Oscar Wilde uh

petterasty and uh peter pimping the North African Escapade in which Oscar Wild

makes puff daddy look like you just you just insert someone, whoever, it makes him look like someone who wouldn't do traffic people across state lines for sex.

So, Andre Gide, I was reading about. G-I-D-E, G-D-A, I was saying, but And Andre Gide is apparently how it said, and he was a pederast. And wrote all these differences of homosexuality, but people said to him, you know, are you a Sotomite? And he said, I'm not a Sotomite, I'm a pederast. You see, because he was interested in young boys. And he was very open about it.

And then he won the Nobel Prize in literature after that was all out and about in 1947. Because he was French and it was a different time. I mean, it was, homosexual was legal, I believe, in France at the time. But it was still considered socially damaging. And so, I mean, I was written about how he was against. He didn't like a Proust. He said Proust wasn't sufficiently gay. Proust was gay, but Proust should have been open about being gay.

Proust's big thing was, never say I. You know, I can have gay characters to do things, but I enjoy. The more I read about Proust, the more he seems to enjoy being closeted. And this is an interesting type of man who I've met many times. The man who enjoys being. People go, I cannot live a lie anymore, but there's a certain kind of gay guy. It's like, ooh, living a lie. Sounds cheeky.

And so it's on one side of that, and Gidey's on the other, where Gidey says, I hate me if you must. I love the children, boy. I'm going to cut myself off. That impression goes on for a long time. I've gone back in the podcast, and I've made... I think people should have to hear that impression. I don't actually know what he sounded like.

But apparently, yeah, Andrei Gide, who I've read some of his work now after reading the... People are not as keen to champion him. Now, if you can believe it. Now, monsieur, I'm not the homosexual. I'm a pederast. It's a documentary. Oh, it's a film.

That might be recorded. Can't wait. Can't wait to see him say it. It's different. The French, you know? The French, they're different. And I'd have to think that this, like him being the preeminent man of Parisian arts letters, I think he was born in the fifth or hundred.

Mont and he died in the sixth. I can't see it. It was something like that. Anyway, but after, in the generation after him, so he dies 51. But then all the people come to, you know, the Sartre and the, someone to be foie.

And I think not Camus, but I do think you're Fokal and, you know, there's probably others as well. But then they're all really like, all like pumped up for Pederasty. They love, they're like, what do we do?

these bourgeois people taking away our pederasty. The French man, different, interesting. In my opinion, bad, bad stuff going on there. Call me a prude if you must, but I disapprove. But I am looking forward to reading the books. And in redoubling, again, you don't hear as many Oscar Wilde defenses out and about in the wild, if you will. But the Wilde in you, as it may have been, if you were a young woman.

but um yeah people people really stand up for a while and you you say he was a better assed and people go oh good that is up at the most far it was you go no he was he was he was Andre greed sorry this book goes taking a ton to the same soul yeah hey look we'll be back to a more regularly scheduled I assure you there will be more regularly more scheduled I think we we're doing such a good job of taking the podcast to a whole other level visually and professionally. And I hope you've enjoyed this brief step back into the past. But, yeah, big, good, good, positive, big good, big good, positive, man. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah. Amos Gill's in town. He might, trying to get him on the show. that sort of business you know working on starting a museum it's going to be called

the Museum of Greatness I think of though I think I'm going to mostly talk about that museum on the Patreon thank you to everybody join the Patreon thousand

plus you know oh yeah we'll get back with Sam Clark it's good having Sam Clark in the room I'm drowning one of my own

I eat food when I break my fast I feel oh what's up Lethargy. Tired. I'm just having heaps of carbs.

Crackers, crackers, crackers. What else have I got here? I'll tell you, the other books, I mean, I've got to sort out my books. When I left for America, I just got, Dante's Hell, I got Shannon Burns' childhood. I got Einrand, the Fountainhead, the Big Three. I have all these. I was an avid book collector when I was in Australia before moving to America. I got thousands of books, and I managed to get rid of a lot of.

of them before I went over stateside, but some of them just went in storage, and then I had to pay all this money. It was, you know, sometimes we didn't have enough money to eat, and I'd look at in the account, and that money had been taken out to preserve the books, which was not clever. Anyway, I'd like to get on top of that. I'd like to actually read some. I'll just Simone Bauer. I've got so many, my room's a mess.

But important to have, I'm going to get. affirmation. I'm going to clean my room. Thank you, Dr. Peterson. And we pray for his good health. We pray for the good health of a lot of people. I'm hearing all these poor, sweet people out there with cancers. Oh, I should also say three, I mean, it's huge events are coming up for me. You're talking about having a child time?

Yeah, yeah. But also, Eurovision's coming up real soon. Love Eurovision. Can't wait to pick which song is going to win. Australian Survivor, love an Australian Survivor, loving it. Loving it. And that's it now.

And the Crowboys playing on Saturday. Huge. It's a very big. It's very big. AFL football starting up again. You baby. And so many wonderful podcasts. This is. How many of will say it is? I don't know. I'm going to clean my room. I've got to go and clear my room. That's what I have.

Thank you for. listening to this, admittedly, stopgap episode. I love you. I miss you. I want you. Khamran, ho. Goodbye.