The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - Electric Art Auctionaloo

Episode Date: September 25, 2023

Reserve your spot at the ART AUCTION TWO, coming October 13 at praxis in Adelaide: https://www.trybooking.com/events/landing/1061839get onto the patreon: www.patreon.com/jdfmccann Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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CBC News. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessie Cruikshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture. But when I have questions, I get to phone a friend. I phone my old friend, Dan Levy. You will not die hosting the Hills after show.

I get thirsty for the hot wiggle. I didn't even know a thirsty man until there was all these headlines and i get schooled by a tween facebook is like a no that's what my grandma's on thank god phone a friend with jesse crookshank is not available on facebook it's out now wherever you get your podcasts a cast helps creators launch grow and monetize their podcasts everywhere a cast.com Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com I'm back from being on tour, ladies and gentlemen.

And it's great to be here on the James Donald Forbes McCann catamaran plan once more. Am I tired? Yes, I am. Am I tired? Man, oh, man. We did a big tour. Well, a small tour. We were in Melbourne. Sam Clark and I, first mate Sam Clark, we were in Melbourne. We did two shows in a lovely little basement. Then it was off to Wagga Wagga. We caught the train to Wagga Wagga to be at the Stirrits house. And gee, that was a wonderful time.

Thank you to everybody for making that possible for that beautiful backyard gig. And then we capped it off. At the end of that gig, we got quite, well, I became inebriated while watching the football and had a very happy time of it. But then it was a midnight bus to Sydney, which was about as pleasant as you can imagine. And then a glorious gig in Sydney. And then an early flight home to Adelaide. It was a real whirlwind trip. And the good people of Jetstar have now returned my bag. I'm just going to focus on the positives, but they did lose my bag.

They have found my bag. I got it late last night, so there was no podcast. There was no time to record it. You know you're taking a chance when you go with the cheapest airline. You're rolling the dice. You might die. You might lose a dice. You might die. You might lose a bag. You might have to stop a terrorist attack. Get a little food poisoning. You might

fall in love. It was an incredible trip, and I will talk about that hopefully in a follow-up episode. I'll just sit down with Sam Clark this week, and we'll talk about the tour and all the wonderful things that happened. But there is something quite pressing that I have to discuss today, something truly urgent, and it's not something that everybody listening to the podcast will be. It's an Adelaide-based thing. If you have absolutely no interest in what I'm doing in Adelaide, well, this might still be of academic interest to you, but this is largely for the Adelaide listeners.

Listeners in Adelaide. Also, people near Adelaide. If you're in Melbourne and you think you could get over for October the 13th, this could be for you. Perth, Sydney, Brisbane, Wagga Wagga. If you're anywhere and you could be in Adelaide on October the 13th, the day before the First Nations referendum, this is for you. This is very important. It's the James Donald Forbes McCann Art Auction.

Art. Free booze. VIP. Fancy. Good time. I'll be there. That's right. The James Donald Forbes McCann Art Auction is back again. This time we're doing it

at Praxis Art Space on October 13 and spots are limited. There'll be lots of art being auctioned off at a variety of prices. You don't need heaps and heaps of money to come along and invest in your art future or

indeed your art present. You can't invest in the art past. Unless I can invent a time gavel. Friday the 13th of October. There's no way that could be a spooky date for anybody. Friday the 13th of October, Praxis Artspace. We're going to have free booze, live music. We thought about doing some dead music

and thought that would be too macabre. Great art, which from my favourite Adelaide artists, wow, it's going to be a great time. Praxis Artspace, the number one most cool artspace in Adelaide. Currently the plan

is to just do it in the flesh. There's no online component. You've got to get your ass down to Praxis Artspace October 13th. It doesn't cost anything to come along. It'll be a wonderful evening. Highly recommended it. This week I'm just organising promo for the art auction. We've got almost three weeks to make sure.

We've got the art. That's great. I'm going to start securing the art this week. We've got the space. That's done. Done. We've got the drinks. That's done. Done. We've got the live music. I'm going to start securing the art this week. We've got the space. That's done. Done. We've got the drinks. That's done.

Done. We've got the live music, I'm pretty sure. And we'll check that today as well. I thought about doing it. I haven't done it yet. Now we've just got to get all the glorious people of Adelaide and the Adelaide surrounds who are interested in coming and having a glorious night of art, merriment, and buying me a boat.

That's the Adelaide Art Auction, Friday the 13th. Tickets available now. I say tickets, it is free. You just have to register a spot. It's a big room, Praxis Art Space. I hope to fill it up with lots of art-loving people. Last time we got 70 spectators along. That was the maximum number under the then COVID restrictions that

we could get into the wonderful space we did it at then. This time, it's bigger, it's better, it's more productive. Wow. Hey, here's Paul. Paul's coming into the room. Hi, Paul. Hi. Come and talk into the microphone. Paul is helping with the art auction, but he's also opening a bar, so he's got a lot on. Paul, how good is this art auction going to be? Oh, it's going to be incredible There's just going to be so much art, I think Right in the mic

Right in the mic The art auction Boy, boy am I excited Paul's got a lot of other stuff on his mind at the moment Get out of here, Paul I'm going to keep telling people about this wonderful art auction Can you move your car? Yes telling people about this wonderful art auction. Can you move your car? Yes!

Okay, I'm back from having moved the car and I'm back into single-mindedly pursuing making the art auction a good time. Last time we did the art auction, it started off as a joke. I got a napkin from Dusty Rich. He's a comedian. I did a gig with him. He doodled on a napkin

and I thought about, I think it was him. He doodled on a napkin, and I thought about, I think it was Pablo Picasso used to doodle on a napkin, and then now you can buy his napkins at auction. So I thought, why wait for someone to die if they do a great napkin doodle? I took his napkin, and I said, right, we're doing the big art auction for the napkin. Then all these people started coming out of the woodwork saying can you we could do my art too and I thought well maybe I'll ask a couple people if I can do their art and then all of a sudden we had a big art auction and I uh I don't know if I let on too much while I was doing I had just started the James Donald Forbes McCann catamaran plan podcast at the time but I really thought it

was going to be a big failure, and I was very, very scared, and then it went very well. It went so well that people told me, James, you have to do that again, and it's not as though there's not enough to be done as it is. I've got to sort my visa out. I've got to do my job. We've got to edit up the special that we just recorded across three cities. I've got a book of poems that needs to come out. Although I am glad to possibly delay the poems a little bit because I wrote some new poems on tour. Oh, would you like to hear one of the poems? Oh, I'm so glad you asked.

This poem is called Young Sheldon. Sheldon. They're up to Young Sheldon season six? Sheldon. Is that necessary? Is that possible? Sheldon. Sheldon Season 6? Sheldon. Is that necessary? Is that possible? Sheldon. Sheldon must be getting older now

than the average lifespan in Guinea-Bissau. Baby, how long does Young Sheldon have to run before it synchronizes with the Big Bang Theory? And then we'll have achieved what? 30 years of Sheldon?

Are we approaching, forgive me, dementia Sheldon? of Sheldon? Are we approaching, forgive me, dementia Sheldon? Dead Sheldon? Just season after season of an urn. For how insatiable is America's appetite for Sheldon? We all remember the first time we saw Sheldon. And we all thought, didn't we,

an autistic professor. Good with numbers. Hard time with the ladies. Onwards and upwards. What's next on the list of fresh new ideas? Bringing back the twist? Sheldon. Is what we all said to ourselves.

Sheldon. But out there in the suburbs, they cannot get enough. Sheldon. They want Sheldon in the morning. Sheldon in the evening. Sheldon in the afternoon. And through the long, cold, lonely night. Sheldon in the evening, Sheldon in the afternoon, and through the long cold, lonely night, Sheldon. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bring this poem to an end

before it grows to Sheldonesque proportion. I'm not fully happy with that poem. That's a first draft. That's a first draft we did on a plane, and we're going to work on another one before that makes its way into the new book of poems. Oh, let's have another poem, hey? Another poem. It's a short one. I'm gay. You're gay. We're all gay.

For gay cream. That one didn't do well when I read it out loud to other people, and I don't like saying it now on my own. Licensees. Licensing. Frasier Crane. Chandler Bing. We're working on the poems. it out loud to other people and I don't like saying it now on my own, licenses, licensing, Frasier Crane, Chandler Bing, we're working on the poems, we're working on the, there's a lot of notes for poems, these aren't, ah, maybe we got, Elton John, Elton is bereft, Elton John, Elton husband left, Elton John cannot carry on, Elton John not allowed to see his son, Elton John not allowed to see his son I don't know that one Here's another one

Russell Brand it's getting out of hand I heard he from Khomeini Man that's very sad Anyway we're still What I'm saying is we're working on the poems There's more poems to come I don't want to just dash out the silly Well one more poem

Man slash woman Is a very inclusive category I don't want to just dash out the silly well one more poem I'll give you one more alright here's a poem man slash woman is a very inclusive category but a very nasty instruction it's more of a joke than a poem I just wish I had more poems I keep working on my damn poems

don't make me chat desperate weekend dad in an upper middle class adventure playground Poems Don't make me chat Desperate weekend dad In an upper middle class adventure playground Anyway we're working on the poems And that'll all be out soon in the book of poems Big happy explosive book of poems But we're not thinking about the poems

We're just thinking about the art auction Now I'm going to keep this episode short I've got a lot to do for the art auction today If you are in Adelaide or could come to Adelaide for October 13, please do come to the art auction. There'll be an episode later this week, a proper one. We're going to sit down with Sam Clark.

We're going to do a proper debrief on the tour. I am looking at the analytics for the show. Here's a little something that I would like to mention. It seems... Well, hello, T-Tap. Hello, Jack. How are you? I'm all right. How are you? Well well i'm just recording the podcast um this ah we're fast approaching 100 and no closer to having a boat but we're just organizing

the art auction at the moment which is october 13 i don't know if you're free or if you know anyone with a lot of money who could come along. Timothy Tubbins just popped into the office. I don't know if I've explained what's happening with the office. So my friend Paul, who I'm doing the art auction with, and he's also my neighbor and many other projects and really living out of each other's pockets. And boy, when I started living next to Paul, I thought that was insane because we were already friends and Paul was for it and his wife was for it and my wife was for it and I thought you can't move one door down from a close friend. Be in the same neighborhood, great, but that will absolutely bespoil a friendship if you're that close to one another. I was totally wrong. It's been a wonderful thing for my life and for our friendship and for our children's lives and really it has done more than anything to convert me to an anti-car position where we

live in walkable communities and we know all of our neighbors and i i'm a big believer in that and it's all thanks to that anyway paul is starting a bar i have an office in uh just off the bar but it's a it's a flurry of activity now. The office is fast filling up with things that they'll be putting in the bar. Bookcases, a little picture of Mary of Guadalupe, a lot of big light globes. I think the big light globes have actually been taken out because the previous occupiers of the space, they had those big Edison bulbs. And they've been removed for what purpose?

I do not know. Maybe big bulbs are out and it's all about small bulbs. As go asses, so go bulbs. And I'm very proud of my friend Paul for opening this bar. It's something he's wanted to do for a long time. It's something his sister, who has passed, wanted to do. And he's living that out, making this literary bar. It's something he's wanted to do for a long time. It's something his sister, who has passed, wanted to do. And he's living that out, making this literary bar. I'll say more about it later. But it's, you know, maybe it's an exciting time. It was weird walking through the streets of Melbourne. And there are just so many cool little bars. So many. Adelaide, we got like three. We got about three cool small bars and there's a pretty high

turnover it's a very different city i mean it's smaller melbourne has what like four or five million people something like that adelaide's got one million so you know for a long time melbourne was around four times bigger but it has more than four times of the youth and the culture and the jobs that that's always... You want to be outperforming for your culture, for your city showing up. I have big problems with Melbourne. I'm an avowed Adelaide advocate.

But it's part of the reason people feel that they need to get out of Adelaide. It's because we don't have culture here 11 months of the year. That's the vibe. We've got the Adelaide Fringe Festival. It's the biggest fringe festival got the adelaide fringe festival it's the biggest fringe festival in the southern hemisphere which is always a beautiful it sounds impressive when

you say southern hemisphere until you realize that really just means better than argentina it's there's a couple not all there's a couple of South American countries. Actually, no. Hold on. Is all of South America under the equator? Ecuador? Hold on. Hold on. We'll open up the phone. What do you reckon? What do you reckon? What do you think?

How many countries are under the equator in South America? Loading. It is. Where's the equator? Where's the equator? Why isn't the equator on Google Maps? Did anyone else know this? That they don't put the equator on Google...

Ah, so I've got to go to Google Earth now. Hold on. Bloody hell. Got to load up Google Earth like some sort of, what was I looking at last time, well, where's the equator on Google Earth, well, they just don't put the equator on these things, I gotta do it, I gotta eyeball it, if I get the polar at the bottom and the arctic at the top, I'd never realized they don't put the effing equator on. Everything. Give me everything. Give me the equator. Did anyone else know that they don't put the equator

on Google? Equator. Far out. There we go. Okay. Yes. It is as I suspected. It runs through Brazil. You don't get Guiana. That's in the Northern Hemisphere. What's that? I can't even zoom in enough on this tiny little... It was a simpler world when we all just had globes. Can you hear the frustration sinking in? Anyway, what I wanted to say was we were in Melbourne. There was a lot of cool stuff going on. Made me think of Adelaide, how there's not as much cool stuff going on. And I was proud of my friend Paul for making a cool place. That's it. Ooh, we're going to get this art auction done.

It's going to be beautiful. And let's have a... Oh, why not bring it back now? We said we were going to bring it back. Let's have some affirmations. Some affirmations. I affirm that I'm going to work hard to make this the best art auction I can. I'm not going to die wondering.

Affirmation. And I'm going to make this a big, beautiful art auction. I'm going to get a cool outfit. Affirmation. And a real gavel. I'm not going to resort to just using a hammer this time. And we're going to have great music and great plonk and great beer. And we've already got the great art.

And we're going to get, whoa, the big, powerful people. Affirmation. We're going to make it work. And we're going to get whoa a big powerful people affirmation we're going to make it work we're going to get the money use that money to buy a boat affirmation is that an affirmation not sure i'm new to doing this again we can just try our best oh here's another one i've come back from being on tour and i've been grumpy with my family today boy i was grumpy with my family today. Boy, I was grumpy with my family this morning because I'm in my bed in the morning. Every child I have comes through and gets in the damned. I wake up. Affirmation. Not only is my beautiful wife in the bed, that's part of it that I like. Three kids in the bed. Oh, I try and get up before the kids. They get up so early.

In my day, I just wanted to sleep in. I wanted to sleep. When does that kick in? When do kids start wanting to sleep in? Ah, and then I'm a grump with my wife in the morning. We're trying to have our coffee and the kids are coming out and they're just badgering, badgering, badgering. And I love my children so much.

But I just want to sit and have a coffee with my beautiful wife. And it's weird. There's a real anger to having the small children get in your way. And it goes away when you're living in that house for a while. But you go away for as few as 24 hours and I come back. And I'm just not adjusted to being a happy groovy dad I'm so grumpy but I affirm that I will stay the course I will be less grumpy I will not be as grumpy when I'm tired with all my kids affirmation I will not I will not be so grumpy I'll be a better, kinder father. I'll be a more attentive husband.

Ah, I'm just so angry at all of my small children in my bed in the morning. The screaming. The screaming. There's oh so much. Where did they get it from, Jimmy? Maybe they get it from you. Affirmation. Affirmation. I'm going to try from you with this thing. Affirmation.

Affirmation. I'm going to try and keep my voice down. Affirmation. We're going to try and keep the voice down a little bit more. Affirmation. Ah, I love you. I love you. I need you. I miss you.

I want you. Canna Moran ho. Let's just all try and be our best selves. Affirmation. Nah, let's not do that. That's a terrible week. That's a terrible week. That's a piss week philosophy. Let's become saints.

Let's prayerfully become saints as soon. Right now. Not as soon as, we're saints today. I'm going to try and go to confession. I will go to confession today. Affirmation. I will go to confession today. If they're running confession

I'm going to look it up I'm sure they're running it somewhere Here's a song I wrote on a train It's called Choo Choo It'll be out soon Don't forget to reserve your spot For the hard auction baby Choo Choo Thank you. අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි Thank you. අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි අපි Thank you. Bye. As a Fizz member, you can look forward to free data, big savings on plans,

and having your unused data roll over to the following month. Every month. At Fizz, you always get more for your money. Terms and conditions for our different programs and policies apply. Details at Fizz.ca. If you're looking for flexible workouts, Peloton's got you covered. Summer runs or playoff season meditations, whatever your vibe, Peloton has thousands of classes built to push you.

We know how life goes. New father, new routines, new locations. What matters is that you have something there to adapt with you, whether you need a challenge or rest. And Peloton has everything you need, whenever you need it. Find your push. Find your power. Peloton. Visit Peloton at one you need, whenever you need it. Find your push. Find your power. Peloton. Visit Peloton at onepeloton.ca.

ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessie Kirkshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture. But when I have questions, I get to phone a friend. I phone my old friend, Dan Levy. You will not die hosting the Hills after show. I get thirsty for the hot wiggle. I didn't even know what thirsty meant until there was all these headlines.

And I get schooled by a tween. Facebook is like a node. That's what my grandma's on. Thank God Phone a Friend with Jessie Crokschank is not available on Facebook. It's out now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts. Everywhere. Acast.com.