The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - Pre-Organhour - James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - S2EP#5

Episode Date: February 16, 2026

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Thank you for listening to this episode of the James Donald Forbes-McCand-Catamaran plan. If you'd like to listen to bonus episodes, go sign up to the Patreon. That's patreon.com. Clom? Ah, we f***ed that. Anyway, look, you'll find a way. You are listening to The James, Donald, Forbes, Macon, Catamaran plane. We're just going to need a real organ.

Yes, we will. Salvo's Regency Plaza, hardly speaking. Hi, have you got one of those big wooden electric organs? No. That's all right. Thank you so much. Thank you. Bye. There's been a hot day's night, and I've been trying to find an organ. Good afternoon, Windsor Garden Salvo Storr.

This is Michael speaking. How may I help you? Hello, Michael. Have you got one of those big wooden electric organs there? No, we don't. Do you sometimes get them in? On the odd occasion, yes. Okay, thank you. Okay, not a problem. Good afternoon, Campbelltown, Salvos.

Stour guard speaking, how may I help? Hello, do you have one of those wooden electric organs? No, not at this store, I'm afraid. But I would certainly suggest you give our bigger stores a ring, maybe Windsor Gardens or Kensington Gardens. Thank you so much. No worries, you're very welcome. And also check online.

I know. Facebook Marketplace is usually good for it, but I would like to come in and play it before. If I go to someone's house, I'm going to feel obliged. Yeah, no worries. Certainly try the bigger ones. All right. Kensington did you say?

Windsor Gardens on the North East Road. Yep. And Kensington Gardens on McGill Road. All right. Thank you so much. No worries. Good luck. Thank you.

Bye, bye. Good afternoon. Conningtonton Gardens, I'll be speaking. I'll help you. Hi, do you have one of those big wooden electric organs? No, we don't have anything like that. I understand.

Thank you. Be welcome. Look, we'll just do it on Facebook Marketplace in another time. That's fine. We may as well, we've got all this set up. We may as well make a call. Nice will get someone on the pod. Oh, yeah.

See if Samantha wants to talk socks for a minute or two. Hello. Hi, do you have a minute to be on the podcast? Yeah, go on. All right, you're on the podcast. Okay. It's because of being here. What are you want?

Samantha. Well, we did the episode where I ate a steak sandwich. and that went pretty well. Gorgeous. Was it a good steak sandwich? It was one of the best. It was the Exeter one and I'm going to be there. Yeah.

Where from? From the exit. It was the exit. It was the X in town. You'll see. How long until you're here? I arrive on Sunday. So.

This Sunday. Was that five days? Yeah. And we're going to put you up. We're going to figure it out. Yeah, I was going to ask if I need to bring a blow-up mattress. No. No, you don't.

Okay. But we'll figure it out. All right, thank you. And you've got the socks. I've got the socks. I've got a whole stockpile of socks sitting in the corner of my study. How many socks are we talking about? I'll just briefly explain.

Shall I'll give the listeners a heads up. Now's not a bad time to start it. I'm speaking with Samantha, who has been researching the finest socks and has ordered a great many of them. And I'll be finding out which is the finest pair of socks. Sox. Sam, how many pairs of socks are you bringing with you? I'm bringing 10 pairs of socks, James. Whoa! Whoa! Have those Turkish socks come through? They are arriving tomorrow.

Wow. And I think I've actually, I've got a bit of a Uniclo-Sock conspiracy cooking as well. So I think we'll have to explore that one a little bit as well. Did Muzzi socks get a look in? Oh, they absolutely did. Yeah. Interesting. And was it the budget provided for all the socks was acceptable? Absolutely acceptable.

I'm still trying to. Sock budget? I didn't go over. I'm quite under, actually. I'm trying to spend the rest of it. How much have you got left? I'm going to have to buy some more expensive stock. How much have you?

I'll say to the listeners now, I've outlaid money for the sock budget, much in the same way we did with the steak sandwich. We go, that's a $30-40 steak sandwich and a beer, and we got more than $30-40 extra out of it. We've got some money for the sock budget, and we need, to get more views to make it worthwhile to have all the socks, but how much more do we have in the budget? I got $500 left, James.

Wow. Should I just buy some really expensive socks? I mean, the video doesn't have to be as good. Do you know what I'm saying? If it was, and I'll tell Sam now, Sam, how much money did I give you to buy socks? $1,500. I gave $1,500.

I think $1,000 is a good clean amount of money. Sam's not thrilled. I can see it. Sam, are you thrilled? No, I am thrilled. This is good. I believe in the sock. So you want to know what the best socks are, Sam?

Yeah, exactly. I do. This is serious work. What's the best sock? According to me? Actually, yeah, we have to do the test to find out. But that's the whole point. Yeah, we didn't have to do the test.

I mean, I want it to be the Burberry sock. I really want it to be the burberry socks. We got burberry socks, burberry socks, whoa, wearing burberry socks because I'm feeling hella English. An extra 500 is, what were the most expensive socks so far? At this stage, it's still the burberry socks. I got scared of buying those really expensive ones I sent you

because they seemed too expensive. But now I've come so under budget that now I'm regretting not having bought those really expensive ones. I mean, I can see the thumbnail being my face. I look shocked I'm like and the thumbnail says $500 socks

question mark was it worth it and people will need to know I guess I should buy those socks I'm comfortable I'm comfortable 10 is a good number a thousand is a good number

and we can honestly say we've spent a thousand dollars on socks which is huge and wasteful unless we make more than a thousand dollars on the video and then it's an intelligent choice. I think there's a very noble pursuit to be hard in finding out whatever the best socks are. I think it's like, I don't know.

How much suffering is brought about through improper socks? I mean, yeah. Yeah, blisters. I got also coming in the mail of some toe socks because people who walk a lot truly do swear. I love that. You'll be here on Sunday. We're going to make the necessary adjustments.

I'll see you there. God bless you. Thank you, James. I'll speak you soon. Can you make mention of the hazer? Oh, you like that? You love it? No, I don't like it.

I just want the mention made to say that you told me to put it on. I did tell Sam to put the hazer on. I thought it would add something nice. That just clears me from the cinematographic sort of. This is my call. Do you like the haze? Do you not like the haze? Let Sam know.

I don't read the comments. There's a guy on here that I thought about calling, and then I remembered he was dead. It's great to have the technology. I'm ready to start the podcast now. If we'd found an organ, that would have been something. Here we go. I'm ready to start.

This will be the start of the podcast right now. I can do a better start. Oh, it's the James Donald Forbes, McCann, Catmaran, plan up in here. Show today. Is this an exciting enough beginning? I'm trying to really catch people. So much going on on the pod today

Interviews The Bell New music We got the best podcast music I put the hazer on So it's some smoky We got crazy Singaporeese news I bought some stuff

This before I was in such a good mood this afternoon I was in a really good way because I went out and I played tennis in the heat and I was, I took my shirt off. I was playing with my friends, a couple of men and I had my shirt off and I was just like sweating with the shirt. I look terrible with my shirt off, but I was sweating with the shirt off. And it was, felt so good after that. It felt like I'd been sitting in a soreness. Dopamine started going off.

I just, I made that on garage band. That's a song that I've made on garage band on my phone. and I'd like to get together with some Japanese musicians to turn it into a number one hit single in the island nation of Japan. Oh, I've just been brought down low. I was so happy before. I'm having big mood spikes.

James, is it because you stay up late, drinking lots of alcohol at night and watching the Winter Olympics? Yeah! I watched the curling. I watched Canada take on Sweden in the curling, and it was brother and sister versus husband and wife. Powerful stuff. Powerful style.

Is there a way for, just in real time to cut down on editing, that that would have an echo on it when I say powerful stuff? It has to be done manually. There's not like a button that you can push on that. It goes, powerful, powerful, powerful stuff. It's going to have to be post. Well, don't do it because I've just. I've spoken about it, and that would ruin the magic now. We'll give McDonough a quick call.

That'll get me where I need to be to start the show. Good day, man. Hey, have you got a minute? I do, I do. Welcome to the James Donald Forbes-McCann Catamaran Plan. It's Samuel McDonough, my friend and lawyer. How are you, mate? I'm great.

Thanks for being on the pod today. I was a bit gloomy to start up, but when we got the phone system working, so, you know, if you want to be on the show, it'd be great to have you on. Is this being recorded for quality and teaching purposes? Nah, just for the podcast. We've got to get that started up again.

I'm not opposed to doing a couple of calls on that, but it's just, it's the worst time of day to do it unless we're going to call, I think, the United Kingdom. Everyone in Australia is winding down. America hasn't working up yet. I see. Yeah. What's near with you?

I don't know. I'm not sure to have been reading a whole lot about extended joint criminal enterprise and how it attaches to constructive murder. Oh, yeah. You know how it is. It's just another day. Well, it doesn't. It doesn't.

But then, you know, just because you change the foundational offense to one involving violence, I mean, that doesn't really deal with the factual inferences that can be drawn, does it? I wouldn't have thought. I don't know, man. My knowledge of the legal system is entirely, I haven't had time since moving to listen to the U.S. Supreme Court podcast.

So I feel a little adamant. of the loop on international. Do they take any breaks? Yeah, they take a lot of breaks. Yeah, I would have thought. Don't work them too hard. They've got to find time to get in their Mepstein files. I don't know if that's true.

Well, I think that's, what was it, his name? Kavanaugh, he was mentioned. I mean, not, not obviously any direct correspondence with him, but just like, you know, we've got to get Kavanaugh in. Can I tell you about Joe Rogan? I'm so proud of him. Yeah, he apparently had no interest in meeting. interest.

I was proud. With young Jeff. Oh, my goodness. I would have had so much interest. If someone I didn't know got in contact with me, if like a financier got a friend of mine to come to me and say, did you want to have dinner with Woody Allen? I would have been like, yes.

I would have been, that's all I would have had to have said. Did you want to meet a famous person? I would have gone, woo! And then later on they'd go, there's a sex island and I'd go, oh, double trial. Who's going to be there? Yeah. Is Woody Allen going to be there? Maybe, as it turns out.

When is this coming out, this episode? I haven't undecided. We're trying to bank as many as we can. Well, the only reason I say that is because, relevantly, Maggie and I were talking about boy names. Oh, yeah. You're out. You're public with that? Well, it depends what time this comes out. Two weeks?

Oh, yeah, that'll be fine. All right. And I was, like Jeffrey just kind of fell out of my mouth. And I was like, yeah, maybe that is nice. You know, that's really... And then I sat on up for a day and then I googled it and went, oh, God, how could I... No, absolutely not.

I'm not allowed to have Donald for this one. I guess. Because of the controversy around the duck. Yeah, people hate that duck. Also, Scrooge McDuck. The other name that I was really hopeful to get across the line. It's hard. It's hard picking a name.

It is. I'm thinking of calling my son McCann. McCann, McCann. Can? No. The can. Oh, I see. Right. So they have to carry a bell. Everyone, I guess, has to carry a bell?

I'll just call him for sure. Yeah. How do you write that down? Gosh, I wish I had something funny to say in response. I'm still so down. I might have to order some food. Can I tell you what I bought recently, Sam? What did you buy recently?

I bought, and this will be better when you're in the room with me. A phrenology head. Oh, hell you. Yes. Yeah. Hell yes. Yeah. Where'd you get that from?

Strathealban. New South Wales Police Department. No. No. Is that a problem there what happened? I don't think it lines up exactly where I, you know. But I've been touching it and I've been feeling it. Mm.

Mm. And it turns out I love sex and I hate everything else. I've got one sex bump. Mm. Right. So describe to me how it works. So does this, does the head? have like multiple different bumps in multiple different areas and you touch that head and then

like as the reference point to then touch someone else's head and see if you've got the same bumps in the same areas. So there's no so there's no the head is is like the perfect natural head. Right. And then you can feel your head or someone else's head and you touch it because you know one's one's own head is covered in unusual little bumps and whatever. So here I am touching my head and I go, ooh there's a little there's a bump. there, there's a bump there, and what's that? And I look at here, I figure out where my ear is and it's, oh no, I have a timidity bump. Oh.

So I'm high in timidity. But then I... But you famously were dropped on the head as a young child, right? Yeah, so I'm trying not to use that side of it. Okay. I'm hoping it's symmetrical. But would you like to know where I did damage to my head? I would.

Yeah. I've absolutely fucked the prudence section. of the brain, according to the bone. Yeah. Right. So it doesn't matter if... The cautiousness section has a big scar running through it. So it doesn't matter if the bumps or indentations or whatever have occurred naturally or as a result of external pressure.

It would be a good question if anyone who practiced this art was still alive. Oh, I have a huge bump on a big out, yeah. Sense of the terrific. and grandeur. Big bumps. Big bumps. The saving, I actually have a dip in my head on the saving section.

Even just describing those particular bumps at that particular section as huge is like consistent. Yeah. Thank you. I appreciate that. And then you can look at your eye, you know, and you can, oh,

it's so, I mean, they say this, this is all bunkum. But, foresight nothing intuition

nothing philanthropy nothing liberality sympathy a dip in sympathy shit respect

we have a bump thank God we have the bump of respect worship about the same as respect sense of veneration of antiquity

well Really? Sense of veneration of antiquity. Yes. Yes. Sam, if you go right to the top of your head. I mean, we're talking like dead center. Dead center of your head.

Not so far back as the ear. Right in the middle there. Rub the top. Yeah. Have you got a little bump right in the middle of the top of your head? Yeah, I think there could be a little bump there. Sam, you might have a sense of the veneration of antiquity. Anyway, I'm looking forward to having you over it.

Maybe this, I think this might be the pod. Just call and cool. people. Can I turn off the haze? What I've always admired about the James Donald Ford's McCann, Catamaran plan, is that somehow you've squeezed dozens and dozens of episodes describing about how you will do a podcast without ever really having done one. As though I had, but when I have, you're saying I have done it. Yeah, that's right.

You mean, like you've released them and you've called them podcast, but the content is so frequently, this is what we're going to do. Yeah. In a podcast. Yes. I am the I'm sort of the You're selling

Seanberg to a Mozart audience Mr. McCann. Please, please. I would never say that about myself anymore. Stability. Power of the will, I don't mind telling you, feels a little bumpier to me

than stability. How many, like, categories are there? It's the busiest head you've ever seen. I might not be doing a great job. Can I see what it says on the back? For 30 years, I have studied crania and living heads from all parts of the world and have found in every instance that there is a perfect correspondence

between the confirmation of the healthy skull of an individual and his known characteristics. To make my observations available, I have prepared a bust of a superior, form and marked the divisions of the organs in accordance with my research and varied experience. L.N. Fowler. And then, dammer. Not a single outlier in his data sheet. A perfect correspondence. Wow.

Well, it's hard to argue with that. What could I possibly hope to say in response to that? I think the left-hand side of the brain and the right-hand side of the brain are... But like, I mean, it's tricky, right? Because it wouldn't include things like respect for the cinematography in Nigella Bites.

Like, that section doesn't exist. Can I feel that? Well, what do you think that would come under? There's ideality. I think that might come under sublimity and sense of the terrific. There's a good chance of that. There's desire for liquids.

Wow, that seems odd. And desire for solids. Yeah, the temple is desire for liquids and desire for solids. Not the mouth? You think over towards the mouth under the eye, it's your language skills. And on top of the eye, you know, on the, what we call? What's that eye shell? What's that?

Socket. Yeah, socket. Sorry, language is underneath the, the eye and I don't mind telling you that I have like it's the cheek bone the cheek bone corresponds with language I have the flattest cheekbones ever so it's fine that I wouldn't

know I sock it yeah it's all the front reasoning nothing humor mirthfulness and wit I don't know if that's distinctly big that's a big fucking problem for me well you've famously never told a joke

people just assumed they were jokes Angus Hodge once said I was like the horse that people say can count, but it just keeps going. You know, you like, you tell it an equation, then it starts dumping its foot. And when people applaud, it stops. He said, that was my common. You just keep going until you get a laugh, and then you keep going again.

And I thought, I thought that was really unkind. What's Angus up to these days? Wouldn't know, but I actually, you know, last time I saw him, I really got along with him. He seemed happy. I think he was doing watercolors, and I thought, fuck, I should be doing fucking watercolors. My job's hard. I want to do watercolors. You did watercolors briefly.

Yeah, I hate it. Oils. Oils in the future? I think my desire for solids is much greater than my desire for liquids. The secret, can I tell you something funny about this skull? The secretiveness section has been rubbed out. Ah, well. Someone has gotten to know where it is.

I should let you go. should finish this. I should finish the podcast, but this has been a good section. I think this has been a really good section. I'll be to be any assistance. I can be. God bless you. God keep you. I'll talk to you soon. Thank you, James. All the very best, mate. Bye. Bye. Do you know another thing that I bought this week that really made me happy? I brought it in. I brought the two things. Last week I bought that. That made me really happy. And this week I brought that. And the other thing that I bought is these wooden tennis rackets. wooden tennis rackets.

I don't know if they're good ones or bad ones. They were not expensive. They were at... This went to Strath album. They had a lot of antiques there. The antiquing capital of the southern hemisphere. Suck it, Brazil. Sorry, Chile.

Anyway, you can see we've got the Oliver. The Oliver. which is the well it's Oliver I don't know which was which but there's Oliver and there's a kangaroo

and then it says ambassador which I thought was the fanciest one in the store handcrafted from the finest materials

and then the second racket I got is this one that says which is you know I thought ambassador it's probably as good as it's going to get

incorrect Slazinger presents Royal Crown Royal Crown Ambassador I'm not good at tennis It's not my gift But I do find something about the wooden tennis

Records to be really wholesome and charming In the same way that I was looking for that wooden organ before I find wood Something that used to be made out of wood That isn't made of wood anymore I like that So I bought these wooden tennis records They were not expensive

they were $18 each, which is so much cheaper than any other, less nice but maybe more capable tennis racket than a man could buy. And I took them to the tennis racket store, and I said, can I get these restrung? And they said, no. And not only will we not do it, no one can do this anymore. No one has the capability to restring tennis rackets

that are made of wood anymore because the time, I said, was it the sort of thing that I can just do myself? She said, No. So that was tricky. It's got a real bend in it. What does? I don't know if you've seen that.

Oh my. Oh my. It's a real bend. Yeah, that's a little warpy. I didn't notice any problems while I was out playing today. That one's a bit warped. How about this one? Straight as an error.

But they're so nice. And you can just go and play with it. It's not like they're that much worse or different. to the guy who doesn't know what he's doing out there. But you just feel nicer holding a piece of wood. A piece of metal. It's something gross about the new tennis rackets. Reject modernity, embrace tradition.

That's where I meant. So I was thinking that's, I keep thinking what we, I want to open a store. I see it, a shop, a store, a retail outlet. I know all these people who do such a good job in a store and set up so beautifully, but I love going to a little store and I think of what's going to be in the store and one thing I thought we could do is if no one else is doing it

we might get the equipment required to restring wooden tennis records and then maybe we will buy and repair and what I'd love to do I mean I don't know who I could do it with I don't know how it would work but I would love to bring out a line of wooden tennis records I don't know that anyone's doing it anymore.

Is anyone doing it anymore? Is anyone manufacturing wooden tennis rackets? Because it's nicer that way. Wooden tennis rackets. Wooden ter graze rackets. Gray's rackets is still doing it. The manufacturer of high-quality wooden rackets has been at the heart of the graze business

throughout its 170-year history. Oh, wow. One of their records is called The Masterpiece. You can buy The Masterpiece, and it comes unstrung by the looks of it. The Masterpiece, The Wingfield. Do you want to know what the third one is called? I've just discovered my favorite business ever. Mystique.

The next one is called Slam. So they have a new model every year. Every year. Slam was their 2024 model. Mystic was 2023. Wow. 2022 was the wingfield. And in 2019, they launched the masterpiece.

Wow. Wow. Wood tennis club. They run the Wood Tennis Club. Wow. Established in 2019. I'd like to talk to these guys. How much, obviously, all the 2026 model is coming soon.

I mean, I'd like to start with the masterpiece available. How do I buy them? How much do they cost? Our rackets. Our rackets. How much do they cost? They're hiding the prices from me. How much do they cost?

They don't tell you how much they cost, Sam. you have to inquire. Classic. Should we inquire now? Is there any... I found it. I found it. They say they have inquire about it.

Higher up the page. You go, ooh, and then you scroll down and they go, nah. It's 300 US dollars, $295 USD. That's not bad. It's so, it's, that's $500 Australian for a tennis record that's worse, definitely worse than a $30 one. But it's about the quality. of the feeling, not about the quality of the tennis, it's about the quality of the feeling. Do I like only having people named Sam on the podcast?

No, I'd like to get a whole variety of different people. I love all the Sam's, but I'm just saying, you know, is that necessarily the best people all going to have the name Sam in their respective fields? There's no way. But I prefer it that way because I love the feeling. The feeling. Yeah, this is what I want to do I don't probably need

I mean the fact that somebody makes them is fantastic I would be satisfied to restring them and to maybe they'd let me buy them wholesale for the store you come into the store like we get a nice store wouldn't it mean nice to have a beautiful retail environment

but for the shop if people aren't making a good one I think we go well let's see if we can make it but if people are making it this is what I want to do with the socks you know I want to do that with the socks

I mean a thousand dollars there's a lot of money to spend on socks the reason we get Samantha to do it and I will say this they are the best Sam's it's a happy confluence that it's the best of all kinds all right it's good to have three Sam's and these other three people it was entirely

an accident that they were all Sam if I could get Sam Talent on the phone I would but I suspect he will be asleep now but I want to find the best sock. And if we ever were to have a retail, I would want it to be that it's the shop where all the best things are. And that would just be nice to go. And maybe you sell coffee there as well and a little sandwich in the front.

You know, there's a little cafe section. But it's nice to go, because even people, people, it's nice to be in a place where beautiful things are. And I think even if most people, they kind of, people go, I'm struggling to put food on the dinner table. I can't pay $500 Australian for a wooden tennis racket. You go, fair enough,

did you want a $5 dollar coffee and to look at the nice racket? I think people would. And the coffee's bad. Everything else is the best, but the coffee's just black-drip coffee, I think. That's how I see it.

What do you think, sharks? No, the socks would be there, you know? I mean, I would love it if we found the best pair of socks. I'm in a weird, unique position having this show that I can find out where the best pair of socks is. and we'll take cost into account as well. But, you know, maybe there's a good... You don't have a lot of money to spend on socks.

He's the ones you should have. And, hey, you've got a lot of money? Absolutely, here you go. The best... I figured it out. That's the best one. But if you can only get close to the best one, if you want to get pretty close, affordably, you know.

Wooden rackets, again, maybe we just... We get a lot of second-hand wooden rackets, you know? You want a wooden racket? We've got them. okay we've got them they were going to get thrown out they were going to get turned into weapons of war

but we've rescued them they were going to be turned they were just going to cut the end off and they were going to turn them into spikes yeah for Dracula but we've saved them from that I mean if I've managed to go and find

I got a third one at home I don't mind telling you but if I've gone and found those I mean I could put these in a store and if you go I really want a wooden tennis racket, rather than going around op shop after op shop, you'd know where to go. This also goes for wooden, beautiful wooden. Big log organs, non-no's organ.

They're like this big, they're from the 1970s, they're incredibly heavy. You can get them at a thrift store at an op shop, but you've got a fine one that's got it. Well, we go out and we say, okay, honestly, what is the best one? They go, oh, it's this one, it costs X,000 dollars. Right, we'll have one of those in the store so people can look at it. But let's also make sure there's one place where you can get a pair of socks that you like, a wooden tennis racket that feels good. Feels, I don't care about how it is.

I got it feels. Are we selling bells in this store? Yeah. Yeah, we are. I haven't decided that this is the bell that we want moving forward. I like the way it looks. it doesn't quite give me what I need, but a bell. You know what, a pen.

I tell you, so Samantha, she was my boss for a time, but she also had her website called Perfect Forms. I think she was on the podcast. I wonder if she was ever on the podcast talking about it. I don't know if I released that. Anyway, it was called Perfect Forms, and she would just go out and find the perfect version of a thing that she was right, you know, what's the right butter?

Is there one butter that stands supreme? Get the butter. And I listened to Tim Dillon on the way over here, and I'm really struggling not to do the Tim Dillon tone. I think I'm falling into it repeatedly. He has a very sticky way of speaking, and I am listening to the podcast. I mean, he's talking about real important.

He's talking about what's happening with the pedophiles and people who run governments. And I know I'm talking about opening up a store where we sell wooden tennis records and bells. But who's to say? And organs and socks. Nice little coffees. Just a good place to be.

Stationary. Sam, I'm going to take big pauses in between some of the things I say now and please edit them all together like it's beautiful. Well, I couldn't think of anything else. Books. I'd say books? Yeah, books. It's always good to be around books.

Luggage. Records. records physical big you know what I'm saying you love records don't you records I'm going to start again books records luggage knives confection from overseas headphones headphones headphones headphones headphones headphones silk scarves charging cables but really good ones Really good one. Rosary beads And other religious

Little items A comb Go on I think we should hire The world's best engraver I think engraving Is a big part of it But like really high quality engraving

A high quality A really high quality A person they hire To do like the Premiership Cup When the football When they win the football When they cross to the It's because you watch the Australian Open recently

in there, played the engraving. And I thought, man, that person's job, he's being live streamed while he engraves on a trophy. It's a really good engraving. You've got to be really good at engraving. Really good engraving. And with that, with the engraving,

plaques. Yeah. Do your plaques. I think if it's cheap to quickly have a plaque engraved, plaque, plaque, plaque. I think that will start a culture. You know, if they're, That's 30, 40, 40 dollars, which is not cheap.

But I think we can start a culture of putting plaques on that, more memorializing of things, you know. Because a plaque stays. Your graffito, you go, I was here. IKEA! That's a guy's tag in Adelaide that I used to remember. You ever seen the IKEA tag? I've seen that tag. Yeah, he's out in the bout.

But that'll fade, you know, and people will go, oh, that's gross. it over but a plaque I've I've placed only one pirate plaque that I you know plaque that I wasn't a plaque plaque you have pirate plaid I put up one pirate plaque once I won't go into detail about it but I put up a memorial plaque for a friend because actually getting a bench is very expensive getting a memorial bench you got to pay for those thousands of dollars but a plaque I think it costs me little plaque 40 bucks and there's a lot of benches that are not memorialized. And no one's ever going to take the plaque off. Who would question that? Who would go to the memorial bench register? Just get the plaque out there. All he needs the plaque. I think we want to

sell the plaque. Plac. I wonder about makeup and perfume. I wonder about makeup and perfume for the ladies. I think certainly if there was a scent that I felt excited about, But I thought, oh, that's the right smell. I think we could have, that's the perfume that you can just get at the James Donald, Forbes, McCann, Emporium. That's probably not what it's called. I think the store will have a name like, like it'll sound like, but it won't be. Because the word I'm going to say is gross, but it sounds like a good word. It sounds like the right.

So like you couldn't call the store thrush. But I think thrush. Thrush is the right sound. If thrush meant something else, we'd call the store thrush. I'm rushing off to thrush. Where were you on Saturday? I spent two hours in thrush. Do you think the store could be powerful enough to claim back the word thrush?

there won't be another store called thrush I think so long as the you in thrush is designed in a fun way yeah the eye can understand before the brain does the eye can say I know that's a logo for a good store the ear can say you see the eye can look at the colour the weight the size the form of the logo and over by the ear

well that's where the destructiveness. Oh, I'm stuck in. I'll start again on this. You see, the eye can understand the shape of the logo. And the ear can understand the beauty of the sound of the word. Thrash. But the actual brain is probably last, I think.

When I bought it in the store, the guy picked it up like that. He held it like that. He choked it out. I said, can I have that one, please? He went, yeah. Nick knacks, genuinely, like this is a good thing to have in your house. It's a really fun thing to have in your house. And people come over and they go, oh, you've got a phrenology head.

And then they go over it and they touch themselves and they go, I love sex. That's a fun. And frankly, I see no reason that it should cost very much money. There's no way the shape of the head is still in copyright. We could sell phrenology heads. Phrenology heads, composer busts, what are other good things to have in the house? Posters of oil paintings of men in red coats on horses with dogs hunting a fox. Too much for us to sell bathtubs, okay?

Too much. Could we sell feet that attach to a bus? to a bathtub, right, so that you're going to have your bathtub feet, because a bath with feet is so lovely. And we just get little, the feet, the bathtub feet, and you just stick them on there

to your bathtub, you know. Your bathtub's obviously lying down and the feet aren't supporting the weight of the bathtub. We would have to have a lot. Please do not use these feet to support the weight of the tub, let alone with you in it. But, you know, maybe we figure out, We look at some standard tubs and we see what it would be like to put a foot on there.

You know what I'm talking about bathubs with feet? Yeah. That's the sort of thing. We'll be selling at the store. I really like when you go into like a gift store. Yeah. And they have cool numbers for the front of your house. I love that.

I'm going to tell you another one right now. Are you ready? Do you know what is? I'm shocked that they don't make more. of them for how often I hear that people love and want them. Three ducks of diminishing size for the wall. Three ducks in flight, same duck diminishing size on the wall. People love them, people want them. They can't be that expensive to make. Why aren't we doing that? Can they be made of wood? Or does it have to be ceramic? What do you reckon? What's the right

thing for it to be. At thrush, only the best will do. Thrash, T-H. Do you have a pen? Let me do some work on the logo. I don't think we'll be in luck for a pen. Thrush. I'll use my telephone. I don't think that's very good. I think I can do better. I was trying to, what you said about the, hold on. You said that thing about the you. So I was trying to do something a little different with the you. Do you know what I mean? What were you thinking? I think everything else there is a little.

Anyway, we might try that again. We don't want that dollar sign to be part of it. But is there a possibility that the R and the U through sh? Oh, there we. Simplify. Simplify. Simplify. You ready? Just bang some umlouts on it.

Thrush. Throosh. No, it's not thrash. Throosh. You know what I was once thinking of doing for a store? I wanted to, it was a parody script that I, uh, it was like a horror set in a Scandinavian, uh, like a warehouse department store. I won't use the name in case someone gets, you know, let's just say it shares a name

with an Adelaide-based tagger. But I was going to call it Scrum. Like, no one can hear you scrum. In this store, no one can hear you scrum. But like, scrim. Scrum. The scrim. Muji.

Nah, here's the problem. Muji sounds so good. Mujie. Uniclo. It doesn't sound as good. But Mujie. I want to go to Mudge. I want to go to Thrash.

Thrush. Thrash. It feels thrush. It feels expensive. Thrush. Thrush. Thrush. Once, twice. Thrush times a lady.

I don't know who I call to call my name now thrush. I'd like to do all. I'd like to, oh. We'd have really interesting ideas for the kind of paint. Like the store would be painted a certain color. We'd have certain smells for the store. You know, we'd think, I don't know how that. But we do it.

Height of the ceiling. Shade of the light. Scent. The background music. The background music. Would we be writing our own background music? Would we have special music that only plays in thrush? Yeah.

How does the staff look at you? A very special way. What shoes are the staff wearing? The same shoes. The same shoes. Not all these different shoes where you get in there and they're all wearing the same uniform. You look down in your shoes. You go, man, there's a wide diversity of shoe.

The staff wear the same shoe. Do you know what I'm saying? Thrush. Thrash. It's been a difficult day. I really, I like this idea that the store has its own music and you can only hear the music in the store, you know? And it's the best thing. They probably wouldn't be that organ.

and that organ's a bit gauche. But I think, yeah, you know what we'd do? We'd want... Oh, we got a synth pad. No! It obviously doesn't sound like that either. It's a little too spooky. We probably want something a little more.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Wah-ba-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa. This is sort of... You know what it was better... That's slightly wrong. No. Fix that.

There, Sammy. Get out of there. You play one dud note. No, that's not it. But I'm feeling it now. Nah, no, no, no. I mean, I've got this as well. I don't know what they want.

That has to... That has to be... I don't like the reverberation. Anyway, so that's the sort of thing that I thought could be playing in the store. We could have that going in the store while people are doing their shopping. I think that would be...

Obviously, that's just a... sketch and a draft. What a fun time. We'll get that organ. We'll do organ hour. Is this what organ hour is going to look like when we get the organ? I cannot fucking wait to do organ hour. All right. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of the James Donald Fawz-McCann Catamaran plan. I wanted to do a special shout out to our eight Singaporeese listeners. We've moved up to eight. We had one, then we had four. Now we've got eight Singaporeese listeners. God bless. We are growing at an astronomical rate among the

Singaporean community. Thank you. Singaporeans. We love. We love. love you and to everybody else as well we love you really we love everybody we love you unless there's anyone that the singaporeans want us to dislike and then we'll think about it it's very hot in here it's time to end the podcast don't forget that patreon i love you i miss you i want you i need you catamaran ho goodbye