The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - S2 Ep26: newton's cradle high score

Episode Date: August 23, 2026

There are also episodes on the Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/c/jdfmccannQUINCE: https://quince.com/catamaran

beautiful things are happening. Beautiful things are happening all around you if you stop to take a look. Beautiful things are happening everywhere. I've been on a movie set all week. It's been genuinely hard, but not as hard as a stand-up comedy tour because you're with people and being with people makes all the difference. I'm not saying one thing's hard, so you know, so you do enough things and you say, oh, this is actually hard and that's all right. And being on a movie set, wow, it's so hard. But stand-up comedy remains really, really hard. But anyway, it's so beautiful being with these people.

I love these people that I'm making this movie with. The crew, all these beautiful extras have come in. And to the public, I'm not saying. Here's another reason it might not be as hard, I think, to make the movie than doing the stand-up comedy is I think I'm worse at it. And so I don't necessarily know. Do you know what I mean? Like to me, the easiest thing in the world is making music,

but I have been, I've been assured that I'm bad at that. And I think maybe things get more, you allow things to become more difficult by being better at them. You get to go to the more difficult places anyway. Sorry, there's just a little, there's a ribbon off the, I find, man, I find the loneliness of the road very difficult, but making this movie is beautiful. Being on the road or something as well.

But there's so many people on this office, you know, doing this podcast. Is it hard to do the podcast? Well, I tell you what's not hard. Finding beautiful things. Bang, bang. Oh, ho. Yeah.

Come on. To go in the office. Not quite reaching podcast studio normalcy as we had hoped. Also, I have to really get this one right in one. I just really have to get this one right because I lent a cable. I lent the charging cable to somebody during the movie shoot. And then I forgot about it. And so now if I don't get it, you know,

It's not enough battery to do this multiple times. I actually didn't, I don't even remember checking to see how that one was going, but I'm just going to take it on faith that it's going all right. Beautiful things are happening all around you. We're making a movie, and we're having a great time making the movie. There's so many exciting things, but we're making it in a bar, and we've covered the windows so that we can shoot all times a day and make the light look the way we want it to at various times.

Do you know what I'm saying? And what I'm saying is to the public, to people walking by. You know, oh, it's just a bar, it's just a closed bar. But on the inside, something beautiful is happening. And I know that behind closed doors and shuttered windows, maybe we often think about the worst things that might be happening. Excuse me. Excuse me, what did I eat that's making me feel this way?

I don't feel like I've eaten very much of anything. Or maybe it was all those glasses of wine that I had. My point being, I'm getting so fat. It's not what I'm here to talk about. beautiful things are happening all around you unbeknownst to the public behind that door even if even

and I suspect that what's being made for this movie is excellent I can't know that for sure but I suspect that it is excellent because I'm working with excellent people I am the worst actor on the movie

I wish I was just directing I think in terms of directing I might be we'll see we'll see but I enjoy that and acting I both do not enjoy and I'm very bad at it

and wonderfully even though I have to be in the damn thing quite a lot just had money the other people in it are really wonderful and they're lifting me up I've never felt so much like Jerry Seinfeld having my own show and being the worst person in it

and I'm not saying that Jerry Seinfeld is bad but boy he picked good people to be he picked good people to be around him anyway when is you're walking down the street You say, ah, that's a closed door, and you might think, oh, there's some violence is happening there, or abandon, or just rats eating the carcasses of other rats. But actually, what's happening is, and again, even if the thing we're making is no good, the experience of making it together is a joy and a delight. And I'm having such a wonderful time making the damn thing. Just the making of it is so much fun.

If at the end of it, someone said, every file has been corrupted. There is nothing to edit into a movie. It's a huge loss of money. The first thing I would do would be to scream. That vase, done. No, I actually love and respect that vase, so I'd keep that. But something, I would have to destroy something. I would be really frustrated.

But my life would still be richer for having had the experience that I've had thus far, even though I am getting very fat and I'm doing very little. We've got to get this body right. We can't be having the body that we have at the moment. It's not right. It's absolutely not right. I can feel my guts in ways that I never used to be able to feel my guts. Oh, and I'm just, there's food on the set.

And it's not, you know, some of it's lovely, and there's healthy options, but I'm not reaching out for the healthy options. Are you, are you, Jimmy? Beautiful things are happening all around you. And I think we forget that. I forget that. I'm ultimately a pessimist. and I'm going to try, you know, I mean, there's obviously you can see I'm in some sort of office somewhere,

and I'm going to imagine that there's beautiful things. Usually I would see behind an office door, and I just think, yeah, I bet people hate their lives. And then I'm going to think, maybe people are actually doing wonderful things, wonderful things that are not visible to me, wonderful, strange, exciting things. Yeah. Can you feel it? Can you feel it? I wonder if you can feel it.

I got my picture of America back. Well, I'm not just all of America. It's New York City. Man, did that really wear me out? It did. I should stop doing it. I should have a sit down. Oh, wait to have a sit down.

We'll do the standing up part of the podcast. It's been a big week. Sorry, this one's coming slightly late. Beautiful things are happening. Karen J. Callan was on the movie this week. She's coming back as well. She was great. Not a word. She'll more.

Keep it on. I'm going to keep it on. Oh, that's it. Amos Gil, Ruby Sitnik. Waka! Really good people. Samantha's mother. She was...

Well, that'll make sense in the future. I'm pretty sure that'll make it into the edit. Oh, and all the wonderful extras. So many people have just shown up to give their time to this movie. And it means so much to me. And I really hope I'm not making a big piece of... I really hope. I mean, who can know? Who can know? What's good, what's bad? I find that I actually have enough ego not to be worried. If I think, good, thank you, thank, I can say this honestly and not with irony, but thank God for my ego. Thank you, God, forgiving me, for doing, I don't know how to phrase this exactly, for giving me an ego that is a little too large for the every day, caused me a

great deal of pain to get to this point. But thank you, God, for giving me an ego big enough, not to doubt that what we're doing is worthwhile. If I had a regular man's ego, I would be man shaken in the corner, saying, this ain't right that this many people should be working together to bring something that I wrote in a plague child center in Austin. Well, my wife was sick. Just to fill the days and not be so despairing. That's a thing. when I wrote it. I wouldn't have written it. I wouldn't have, even if I had a normal ego, having written that, I would have gone, well, no one would want to see that. Certainly, I wouldn't want to waste anyone's time making it. How could I ever hope people would waste

their time watching the damn thing? But God, thank you for giving me a big enough ego to get this to the end and not to doubt that it's worthwhile. It takes a sick man to be able to do that. Texas, a truly depraved individual to think that all these people, given their time and their effort, are some of the best ever performances for something that are fool like me, right? You've got to have an ego on you the size of Texas. Now, remind me, is that big or is that small? Thank you, God. Here in this office, beautiful provisions taken care of.

I remember when I was in a car, in a few. field in the cupboard. I've got to keep adding things in here until the echo is not quite so extreme. I really like this picture. I think it's from people might be able to zoom in and tell when it's from. I don't know when it's from. I mean, you can see, I think it's from before the Twin Towers were built, so that helps. And it also has a power plant.

I don't know if that helps. And yes, if anyone can tell me the year that this is from. Also, if anyone can date this vase, identify this. cat and plant. Beautiful things are happening all around you all the time. If you're starting to get down, beautiful things are happening. My children have blossoming interior lives, and I'm so proud of them. My daughter, I got a friend who has to do a psych test, a psychological evaluation, to see if she gets a job. She goes, I'm doing my psych test. And my daughter heard this. And my daughter goes, what's the psych test? And we explain sort of

You know, they want to test how your mental health, how your thinking is. Are you thinking, okay? And my daughter just doesn't know. And my daughter, she goes, sometimes I get angry at my head because there are too many voices in there. And I thought, yeah, honey, me too. But that's, ah, you. Something beautiful is happening inside that brain and something painful. I got angry at my head.

That's, oh, daddy knows what, honey, honey, out of the mouths of babes. Honey, daddy knows what you're talking about. Let's try and channel those feelings into something constructive. Because there's going to be a lot of people offering you drugs to deal with that. What about exercises instead? What about it? Something beautiful is happening. Something beautiful is happening in there.

I bet something's happening in your life that's beautiful. Are you awake enough to appreciate it? Woo! Katermaran Ho! James Donald Forbes-McCand Catamaran plan. Let me get you up to speed on something that's happening that I haven't been speaking very much about, but that has been occupying my mind a great deal

as I work on the movie. It's the pride of South Australia, the mighty Adelaide grows. We're in the finals. There's 18 teams in Australian football for the American listeners. Now is not a bad time to watchafl.com, I think, is one of the options.

There are ways to watch it. But the final series is coming up. It looks at the moment like we're going to finish sixth because Melbourne absolutely did what we needed them to do so they'll take our spot in the wild card round having lost to the Western Bulldogs if you can believe that so we get a week off and then we get to play the top rank team and that's good for us as well

the top ranked team from the wild card round that'll be our first game of the playoffs or as we call them the finals. And it's been an emotional week as an Adelaide Crows fan. Big Tex is retiring. Big Tex Taylor Walker is retiring from the game. He's my favorite player of all time. A better set shot you'll never see.

And he's given me so much joy. I started watching... This is 19th season, I believe. And I started watching football or I guess around 15, 14 years ago. I didn't watch it as a child. I watched it when I came back home to Adelaide. and he had just come back from a knee injury at the time and I've just about watched every game of football

that man has played since then and it's brought me so much happiness and joy and it's very sad for me that he's retiring and I hope we can get a premiership I hope it's premiership time Premiership is when you win the whole thing that's when you win the Super Bowl for the American listeners America's team the Adelaide Crows

if we would all just get around it that would mean so much to me so much to big decks if we could just get around it, it's possible to win from sixth. It's not easy to win from sixth. It's better to win from the four. It's much more likely to win from the top four with how the system works. But it's a rigid system wildcard. Let's see how that. Anyway, we're playing from sixth. We've got a week off. We're playing the next week. It's very exciting. Come on, big techs. He just had his last game in the home and away season. That's what they call it, the normal season, the home and away season. You play games at home

and away. You still play home and away during the finals, but anyway, they don't call it that. They call it the finals. Last game, he kicks six goals. People are going, he's got to play on, and other people are going, you know when your body's had enough, but six goals. I mean, he's having a belt a year. He's back in the, he's fine, fine form. He's had some, he's had a couple years there where you've gone, oh, this might be it for the Texan, but he keeps going, and he's not going anymore, and it breaks my, it honestly, it's very, it's very painful. I hope he, I hope it does take the coaching because I'm very invested in the man. He's given me so much pleasure.

And I appreciate that. Shout out the Texan. Shout out the Crow Boys. Let's see what happens. Stay tuned potentially for another very sad podcast from me in the future. I'll let you know after the next final how it goes. And if you want, I mean, start paying attention. Now's not a bad time to jump on the bandwagon.

You want to carry some favor with James Donald Fools, Let me tell you. Let me tell you. You know, because caring about football is a gift that we give to other people. Caring about football is a gift that we give to other people. Is it an immature activity? Sure, I guess. Is it decadent? Yeah, maybe. But when you know about football and a stranger knows about football, you can talk with a stranger about something you might both have an opinion about. Caring, and it's not enough to know about it, you have to keep.

caring about football is an act of charity. It's an act of generosity. It's an act of kindness. I was on the movie set. One of the film guys, he got out his iPad, at some point, there was a lull, and he popped on, just in the corner of the Grand Prix. Someone in the visual team popped on the Grand Prix that was going around at that time. Now, I'm not a Grand Prix guy, but at that moment I wish I had been,

because he obviously cared a lot about the Grand Prix. And caring about the Grand Prix would have been a grand prix. an act of kindness and generosity and connection and togetherness. We owe it to ourselves and to other people to care about sport. Oh, sports dumb, I don't care about sport. You don't care about other people. You are a big silly. It's not about the football.

It's just men running around the field. Yes. Yes. What I've got to do to make you understand? Do you see what I'm saying? It's an act of generosity. How long do I have to keep talking for? How long is...

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That's my personal endorsement of Quince. Ha! I got it. Have I done any of these things? Yeah, I did that. No, I haven't done that, but I can... I'll be doing that in a good... Yeah, I probably did that already.

I just have to do that. Anyway, the important thing is that I have to fill up another, at least, listen, I don't have any more insights. I genuinely, I'm fresh out. It's been that sort of week. It's been up. You can give 110%. You can only give 110%.

Man, this is turning very quickly. This becomes a, whoa, what about it? It's a motivational podcast. People say, give 110%. They say, give 110%. But you can really only give 110% for so long before it comes to you burn up I said I think I said about someone on set I think I've got burned it out and someone else on said said yeah open up your nostrils you're gonna smell a whole lot of burning

plastic which is a wonderful line and I don't know where that came from or if that's someone that said that before yeah I think we're all I think we're all a little bit burning out I have fashioned this little you can see that Is that visible? A fashion that from Blue Tech. Oh, he's not happy. Whoa.

No, look, it's gone really well. It's just a lot, man. You know, you know, you don't know how hard to push people. We don't know how to push yourself. You've got to look after yourself. You're going to look out of yourself. But, you know, what else I have to look after is the absolute bottle. I mean, I'm aware that if I go and make this movie,

one of the best things I could do to have this movie be a successful would be to have an engaged and successful podcast base to really push that out. You know, all those movies that have come out from podcasts. all those people who've managed to flip podcasting into something more successful than that. Me neither. It's a tiny, tiny list of people. It's tiny. It's incredible.

I think how seldom it happens, how much people just stay in the... Stay in your lane. I've never liked staying in my lane. I've had... I need more lane. I've got so precious, I would like that. What else is around the office? James, what else is around the office?

I'd like to know. Well, I'm going to tell you. Here are the books that are around the office that I've brought in that I have not read. Chekhov's plays. Do we think we'll ever read them? I don't know. The interior castle.

Thank you, Kyle. I've started reading it. Here's one that a man that I met at Harvard University gave me. It's a Harvard classics. Five-foot shelf of books, the Confessions of St. Augustine and the imitation of Christ.

It's a nice, beautiful, probably, relatively valuable Harvard edition. He wrote, I just met him at Harvard. And we looked at a Henry Moore together, and I think I said, come down to the show. And he wrote something really nice. I think I bought him a book, and he wrote something really nice in there. And he said it's a bit of an overly sophisticated translation. and gave me his name. And it's very kind.

And I won't read it because it's private and personal, but that book's here, and I was removed. I was very moved. I was removed by that. Ooh. What else is I got? Profile, profile, profile, profile, profile, profile, profile. Bobby Fisher. Some of Bobby Fisher's games.

My clarinet teacher once gave me that book, and I meant to give him his books back. He lent it to me. And I had it. and then I whatever reason I held on to that copy maybe it was greed, maybe it was pride, maybe I just forgot

but later on I had that book still so I bought another copy of the book which is this one so that if I ever see that clarinet teacher again I can give it to him because I still want a copy of that book and I don't know where his copy is anymore you know I just saw it and I recognized it and I bought it and I'm you know

so many people I've forgotten to pay back over the years and it's too long and painful a list to bridge up but I will I must get around to getting back to some of them oh we got this we got this for the movie we got this I haven't figured out what it's meant to do yet doesn't seem like it's really meant to do anything I guess I'll figure that out let me know if you have any idea what that's supposed to do what else have we got here we have this tablecloth have some deodorant I don't really know how to hang that tablecloth that was a piece of chalk that fell on the floor

got this tape measure good working order on the tape measure and um nice chair i do actually i'm now sad that i've i've tangled that as a part of a joke that i was trying to do and um i'll be able to untangle that sim clark will be absolutely furious with me if i can't untangle this mutton's cradle and i did it all for a cheap bit as a cheap ridiculous bit. Aha, yes. Okay, hold on now, hold on, hold on. That's got to come, oh, sugar. Okay, all right, we might need the glasses for this bad boy.

I thought this would be easy, and it's more, hmm, so these ones are fine. Great. Oh, Jimmy, you don't want to have to cut that down and put that back up again. Damn it! Okay, hold on, we can do this. That I think comes through there. Yes. Yes. And then this other...

Yes! Yes! And just these ones to go. I can do it. This, okay. All right. Foof. And okay.

How am I done so much? I'm going the wrong way. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. No. Oh, I forgot a lot of you.

Yes. Yes. You need to see it to be satisfied. I'll get it to you. Oh, that's going to be more subtle with it. My understanding is if you do two of them, it goes two up, two down. Oh, man. That's satisfying.

Oh. Oh, that's incredible stuff, isn't it? Powerful staff on the James Donald Fours McCann-Catimaranplan. party in here. Man, the most impressive of all swinging together, no matter the weather. What if I, oh yeah, what if I, okay? Oh, man, oh man. Oh, that's what I need after a long hard day. The office is a bit of, a bit of Newton's crap. What do you reckon? I can I count them. I reckon I count them off. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 80, 20, 21, 29, 30, 30, 31, 32, 33, 33, 33, 34, 47, 48, 49, 50, 501, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 7, 8, 9, 6, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 80, 80, 1, 21, 2, 3,000, 100, 100, 142, that's pretty good.

well that that probably does yeah I'd be shocked if that I'd be shocked if that wasn't the end of the James Donald Fawkes-Wikant Catamaran plan for the week I love you I miss you I want you I need you I'm still I'm gonna keep working on the film and I think I've managed I don't think there's another advertisement coming for this podcast for a little while so you better go sign up to the Patreon if you'd like to see more I think the next few episodes are just coming out on the Patreon I love you